 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back with another Raw Tier List video with my special guest, BatGrad. And today, we are drinking Life's Necessity, Mother Nature's Breast Milk. Breast milk? Yeah. That's coconut water. That's coconut milk. This is Mother Nature's water. This is Mother Nature's... Huh? Mother Nature's... What were you saying? Cheers! Okay, what are we doing? What are we doing there? We're ranking. We're going to try all these beautiful waters. We're out here in Austin, Texas on special location because the finest water in the world is from Texas, I've heard. That's where the song is from? Yup. Filming for Barbara Brigade Channel. So if you guys want to check out all the fun we're having out here with some of the most amazing guests and coolest people, go to Barbara Brigade's channel. In the meantime, grab your favorite Mother's Breast Milk. So we're going to let Barth the lead the way. We have a variety here. We're going to read about it. We're going to talk about it. We're going to dive in. Where would you like to start here? Can I... Let's just go in order. Yeah. Lead the way. Let's see. Do you have a bias already? Looking at the list, you probably do. Yeah. I'm bougie, so this one, let's bottle. Yeah. Just because of the bottle, right? It's glass. And this one? I don't know. Is that the fake bougie, right? But you know, I've also never been in a, like, taste test hat on. So it's different. Yeah. You know what I mean? I haven't got... I have good vibes about this. Proud source? I don't know why. Metal containers do produce a really nice, oh, we should have some liquid death. I know. So they do have some bubbly ones and a coconut water, but I hate coconut water and liquid death. The bubbles make it better for me. Yeah, yeah. So it might be biased. We're starting with the Desani. Waterfall? I don't care if you don't care. For reals? I have everything. Like this? Well, now I care. I didn't care 10 seconds. Pretty good to shove your ass on it too. Oh, you don't care in that case. All right. You just tainted the whole water. You didn't even going to do a swisher or a smell? Here. Tastes like water. It's a battle drink. So what was it? Heaven? TV static? No. Ohio? Well, you can just go like A through B and I'll put it where it goes. Okay. I think it's B. Yeah. Like, okay. Nothing outstanding, but doesn't taste like Arrowhead. When I'm traveling, Desani is like a gold standard for me. Yeah. Because I know it's going to be pretty good. Like Calistoga, Arrowhead tastes weird. Calistoga. You know how Calistoga? That's a water right? That's some NorCal shit. You know how Calistoga water? I think it's like Arrowhead. Isn't it Calistoga? Like Niagara Falls? So we just had Desani and we're going to probably say okay. Yeah. Which is like B. B. Okay. And I agree. Dude, you just tongue punched the living fuck out of the other one. Now you're water falling? I tasted your dinner from three days ago on the top of Desani. I'm going to save my comments, but you go. This one's fancy. I heard Evion is fancy. It's very fancy. Because I think it comes in glass. And I think it's all perfect. So I do think it has more flavor than Desani, but I don't think it's good flavor. I think this feels like a nice mouth feel. This one feels like this, like has like this lack of water, lack of life. This tastes like someone took this. And tongue punched it. Boiled the fuck out of it and then took out the good tasting minerals. I do agree with you. It's not as good. The only issue with the stuff here is, and we can rearrange as we go. Okay. Because we don't know, right? Yeah. So if I had to even rearrange now, I would probably, because there's no good, we go from okay to great. Okay. I'd probably say Desani's good and this is okay. Okay. I'll put these like this. And then so the best will be here and then. Yeah. And I'll put it, I have them here too. And the shittiest will be here. You ready? You want to go first? What was that called? Evion? Evion. I like our flow here. I don't even see Evion. Oh, pH 8.4. I don't know if you say that. Planet Hollywood? It sounds like I'm smart. That one is popular though. Everyone talks about Evion. I think only like fucking yogurt chicks or whatever. That is the yogurt chick water. What is this? Icelandic? Oh, it's got to be the best. Look at the can. This thing's lit. I just kind of taste the burger I ate earlier. Yeah. I did too. I'm not talking to Desani. I got this fucking cheese residue. This looks fancy. It does look fancy. You've seen Waterboy? No. Dude, I didn't have a child that I told you so many times. Why? Do you gotta fucking make fun of me like that? You've never seen Waterboy? I have to watch it. So he brings a man to life, basically. He's the Waterboy. You get the gist. And he's special, I guess. And he brings... He said I was special. You and Adam Sandler in that movie are a lot alike. He like has this glowing water that he brings a man to life with. And I forgot where he says it's from, but I think Iceland. I might be wrong. I mean that bottle is special. That tastes more like Evion than Desani to me. Yeah. I would place it like in the middle. What do you think? I'll probably say the same. So right now we're going to go okay to Desani. And then the only next category we have is TV static, but then I rank them in the TV static. So that's the top of TV static. Right now. But you drink the whole thing. It's not gross. It's not gross. But this is the closest to Earl Head for me for so far. Oh really? This does have a weird aftertaste that it has more flavor, but I don't think it's good flavor, which is kind of a weird thing. Is it fair that this is lukewarm or still geyser? I think that we're such trained pallets. Yeah. Honest, we are both kind of foodies and we do like good shit that I think we can distinguish it. Okay. What do you think? No? You can't change that? Sometimes the temperature does a lot. Smart water is when I feel fancy. Because I've ever had warm beer. Yeah. You're not wrong. You don't drink room temp water at all. Some people prefer- I do, but it's just these guys are freezing. These are chicks with their makeup on and then this is a chick with no makeup and then we're trying to like, yeah, trying to- I believe in monogamy unlike someone else, I guess. I'm going to be peeing all night. Now I feel like they're starting to taste the same and we need like a chaser, like, what do you chase water with? Why do they say water has no taste? There has to be a taste. We just can't describe it. Well, it tastes like water. You know what I mean? You've said that, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They are tasting a lot of like. I feel like that tastes like the zombie though. Drink that again. Drink that again. I bet you you'll taste something. This is good. Dude, we got to go for a walk. We had a hard cardio session. All right. Here, let me see. Do you want your water to not taste like nothing? Close your fucking eyes won't help. Yeah, you need that though. I kind of taste my burger too. That's not good. It tastes exactly the same. Okay, now do that. Do that one then. Go back to the top. I'm gonna- No way, dude. You're drinking three ounces. How dehydrated are you? I'm gonna piss my brain off. It's good to do that. You ever played beer pong or fucking drunk by the end of it? I know, but we're drinking water. We're not gonna die. They literally all taste the same now. I'm so fucked. This one's better than Evion. Okay, for sure. I agree with you. Smart Boy's gonna go at the bottom of okay. Yep, that's all you got so far. All right. Might as well get this one out since you're all biased about it. And this one too. This might be delicious. I don't think so. I've had that. I grew up with crystal guys. And you like it? I have fun feelings about it. Really? That's my least favorite I think. Now this tastes like nothing. And those taste like magnesium or whatever. Tastes like nothing. I've seen like a water documentary and they talk about like the minerals like magnesium and they're like just bubbles that should adjust the taste. But do all these suck? Are they all the same? Or are we idiots? This tastes like liquid air. Does the air taste like what it's in it? I guess so. Like if someone just farted. I would put this, I'm gonna just split this down the middle. I think this is the standard. So that's the top of static maybe? This is just the middle standard and if it starts tasting shitty, imagine those were open to pretend. Oh shit. Yeah. This, this is the right smack in the middle. All right. So that's top of static. But they're not bad. Not bad. Static's the bad thing. There you go. One, two, three, four. Let's go with this one. We only have five more. You're fine. Let's go with this one. I like the look of it. Appalachian force. See. That's gotta be good. Would you shake it? I don't know. It's a protein shake? Yeah. I like that. What was that all about? That was mother's milk. They say that baking the best coffee depends on the best water. Everything. Ramen, pizza, all of it. But what water then? Yeah. They say New York pizza is only New York pizza because of water. But what water do they use? Bagels. Yeah. They say the bagels, but what water do they use? We don't have New York water. Oh man. The minute you throw a metal container. It's it. Game changer, dude. That's what liquid death to me is like over here. That is good. But then the opposite happens with beer, right? People prefer tap or glass. That is true. But that's in here. Yeah. Or maybe it's just the flavor paired well with metal. No, it's rare. Where you put that? Better than Dasani? Yeah. I'm gonna pour over here. I'm down. It tastes good. I do think it keeps it colder longer. So if you're a cold water person. Does it feel like you're a cold water person? Yeah. Some people don't like it cold. I like both. I like it cold. Let's go with the fancy mancy boss. Is this like, is it Kirkland? They say like gray goose was the shit, right? When we were younger, it was like gray goose. Oh, you're fancy. But then they say Kirkland's the same vodka. Yeah. Do you think this is like that? Like if we put this or this shit Evian into a glass bottle, now we think we're. Well, if you start the experience, right? From the minute your fingers touch the bottle. Yeah. I already feel like a thousand bucks. You feel rich? Watch. Watch. Grab this. Yeah. This feels like a homeless man. No. This reminds me of like summer seventh grade soccer. No. I felt like a homeless man. Like this is my only water. I don't know what that feels like. Okay. And now grab this. Oh. Pull around the Bentley, please. Please. Yeah. See. Yeah. You're right. You're not wrong. So if I start the experience from here, it's like. Oh. What's wrong with me? What's this? It is. You almost missed it. It's thick glass too. That's not a joke of glass. Damn. I think glass wins, dude. No way. More than the metal. Once it touches your lips. I feel like it tastes like something. Like once it touches your lips and it's just. I think that's it. That's number one. Yep. There's that water from the streams of fucking heaven. This might, this might be the water from the streams of heaven. Or did you just fall for marketing? Probably both. All of the above. Because if we took out all the water. Yeah. And we rearranged the container was in. You think we had a different game going on? I might even still just go with the glass bottle. Cause just the experience from the touch has been the best. Which tells you something about branding and entrepreneurship. If you're out there. Yep. All right. Let's go with. We got four more actually. I feel like Fiji gets a bad rap. But I always had a great time with Fiji. You know what? You know what's fancy? One of my favorites. It's hard to find is the one from Hawaii. Oh. I forgot what it's called. But it looks like that maybe a little bit. Yeah. Flowers and shit. I think this is one of the purest waters. I wonder if they add minerals and shit on purpose. They do. They make it taste. Yeah. But then why can't we taste it? Are we just idiots? Like one of my favorite is also aquafina. That tastes good. And aftertaste. Arrowhead tastes like it has zero minerals. That's why it tastes like shit. Still. So where do you put this? I like it. Maybe bottom of okay? Where are you putting it? Up here. Maybe even with the metal boy? Yeah. Push all the way down. Yeah. That's fair. Oh, you really like the Fiji. I think it's owned by Coke. One of these is Odesanias. Odesanias. I think that's why it gets a bad rap. Oh. You know what I mean? Going back to marketing. People are like, oh, that's unhealthy and it's American. All right. This is the five bucks for 24. That's what we do. Going to Airbnb a house with your boys. That's what we bought. That's what it is. It's the cheapest fuck. Yeah. But it'll hydrate you. Tastes like a diluted luge. Oh. Even the plastic feels cheap. That does change. Yeah. Even this is like something. This is really. But it's not bad. There is a not good taste. Because this is like you drink it. Your dog's dirty. You drink some too. You drink some more. Or you mix your supplements with it. Yeah. Because you just don't give a fuck. You don't give a fuck. But I don't like that they made the top so small. Everything about it's kind of cheap. Yeah. Because the minute you grab it it makes a noise. Yeah. When things are within. Like I don't know. But let's say this is $1.50. Yeah. And this is $1.20. Yeah. I am buying this. And I'm not talking about the size. But like the plastic. The branding. Yeah. I like to feel like I like nice shit. There's an experience. Even if it's a micro experience. Yeah. The only difference I won't do that was thousands of dollars. Yeah. Now we got Texas tap water. Cheers. Out of a whiskey cup. You know what it tastes like? Copper pipes. That's just a grass. That tastes like dirt. Yeah. It does taste like grass. Like you ever like been tackled or eat shit. And then there's just like elements of grass and dirt in your mouth. It does taste like I need to brush my teeth. Yeah. Like dust. Yeah. Dusty pipes. Yeah. Like an old closet that hasn't been opened in a while. Oh, I forgot where to put this. Probably at the end. Oh, yeah. And then probably at the end, right? Worse than Evian, you think? Just because the experience. Work experience. Yeah. Just the experience. Because Evian, at least you have to sound like you're speaking French. Yeah. And the bottle's nice. Yeah. How do you like that? Evian. I love that. Evian. Where's the Texas water go? Probably all the way down there. Yeah. Ohio tap water. Yeah. Last one. Okay. Oh, read it. Okay. Mr. Science. Perfectly balanced pH purified water. Okay. It doesn't even say it's water. It says it's a core hydrator. 7.4. Oh. Your body's natural pH balance. See, I was telling you it's more basic than 7.2. Seven stage purification process. Bro. I mean, but they all be saying all that. Look, we didn't read smart water. Purity, you can taste, hydration, you can feel. I throw some shade, but they give us nature's pure source of water. This one has a poem. This one's doing a, what's it called? High cook. Yeah. When you speak, not free speech, but a. Spoken word. Yeah. Spoken word. It's got spoken word on the back. Oh, this one's a squirter. Why are we water falling now? You literally tongue punched my other one. Oh. He likes it. I kind of like the squirting. I do. Do you remember it was probably when you were just in college because I was just graduating high school where they made like a sucky mouth top for the Gatorades? Yeah. Yeah. That was the best. I don't like the squirted. I've never squirted water. Try that. But I also think we fucked up and I'll tell you why after. That's it. It's pretty good, right? That's the best one. So the reason why I think we fucked up is this one was kind of back to back to back to back. So our mouth temp. Yeah. Stay cold. We talked a little bit. Mouth temp got warm. Yeah. And we had Texas gross water. It's really good. It's like, blesses you. But there is something about the squirter for sure. I love squirters. I kind of like squirters myself. And if only there's more squirters. It's like one in 10 chance to get a squirter. Everyone says Voss is it. That is the lululemon of water. It is the lululemon of water. Squirt for me. But nothing beats a squirter. Is it just me or this one's colder too? Yeah. It's cold. Well, these have sat out here. That's why. These have sat out here. We just did a video. I think core is it, dude. Kind of the worst packaging. Except for the squirter. It looks kind of like loser-y. Yeah. I don't love it. This is probably the worst packaging. Or this. But yeah, I think core might be it. You think that's also from the gods of heaven? Oh, we have to drink hose water. Okay. Let's do that. All right. We're going to do hose water. Are we going to run it first? No. To get the fucking cockroaches out? No. You eat the cockroach, I think. Oh, God. What would you do as a kid? You let it run? Hell yeah. All right. Then we'll let it run. Do we even have a hose? My ankle. Do we have a hose out there? Oh. Oh. Oh, no. Oh, no. Dude. Dude, dude. Are you serious? Yeah. I think we have to. All right. Oh. I was just squirting up. All right. Here we go. This water has a smell to it. We just heard that Austin has a serial killer dumping dead. Bodies in the river. Absolutely the worst. Absolutely. All right. I guess our ratings done. I don't need to do it. You got to taste it. No. I heard you. I heard you're right. You got to taste what aged rubber tastes like. I can't. I know it. You could taste plastic or rubber or whatever the hell that is. I don't know when I did it. But as a kid, when you're thirsty, it's delicious. So I think it only, yeah. It only really can do its thing. Yeah. But when it's 100, LA was probably not the same, bro. Yeah. It hit harder in sec. 100 degrees outside. Okay. Mom says you have to go play outside. Yeah. I played too much Ninja Turtles. Yeah. So I have to go play basketball. Yeah. 100 degrees. It's the best. Then it hits. Yeah. It hits really good. Because once you get all the hot water out, it's ice cold. Yeah. It was hot for a long time, which I think kind of added to it. Yeah. Sometimes it would burn your face in Sacramento. Yeah. But that was probably the worst one. The rubberiest one I've ever had. Yeah. That one really tastes good. Ladies and gentlemen, that's your raw water unfiltered, literally unfiltered cheer review. Appreciate you. New content every single day on the channel. Check out Barbara Brigade. We've got a dope, dope talk shows coming and some lifting videos with some amazing guests. So we'll catch you. We're heading off to Houston. Maybe we'll do another cheer list there if we can find something to do. Appreciate you. We'll see you out on the mic. We're out.