 Welcome to your friendly neighborhood amputee Q&A part 2. Good morning, my beautiful friends. Welcome back I did a Q&A video I want to say about a month ago, but there are so many more of you here now And so I put out I call on the community tab on my channel So check that out if you don't know what exists and also on Instagram So follow me there if you don't already if you feel like it for questions So I'm gonna get through as many of those as I possibly can without making this video way too long and boring you guys So let's dive in also real quick I've linked videos below that answers some of the other questions you guys had like what happened in the first place Our first question is from footy wish as I'm not sure if that's how you say your name Let's hope so. Have you always been so positive about your operations and procedures the answer is yes and no I As we know I've had many many operations and procedures not just on my ankle. I've also had Wrist surgery. I don't know if you can see this guy there. Maybe I've also had knee surgery. I've had heart surgery I was supposed to have brain surgery I think that is basically it the first many years that I was having surgeries I was positive But I think it was a faked positivity like I felt like I had to be positive because people had started congratulating me for being Positive and I was like, oh, I have to keep being positive if I want people to like me This is when I was a teenager like 13 14 15 16 and so what other people thought about me really mattered to me and I think that I Projected an image that wasn't necessarily authentic. I didn't really know myself at that point I mean like what teenager totally does we're all figuring ourselves out and so I went through life Not like bitter or negative But I didn't allow myself to really feel anything Because it was scary because it was hard because it was difficult and so I just pretended like everything was fine It wasn't until a couple years ago that I think I really processed all those emotions felt Angry and bitter and I'm sure I probably still have some stuff left to process But that allowed me to actually look at things in a more positive and optimistic light and that allowed me to go into this surgery With I think a more realistic view knowing that like it will be okay, but it's also gonna be really hard Like it's also gonna suck like I talked about in a previous video. I think that's what real positivity actually is It's not always being happy, but it's looking at things and knowing that it will be okay eventually from edfw Were you ashamed at first when you went out wearing your process? That I think they meant prosthetic they said prostate, but hey autocorrect is a funny thing, right? No, I wasn't ashamed when I went with my prosthetic for the first time, but it definitely was weird I have this really odd thing I know a lot of amputees who like wanted to hide their Prosthesis or their prosthetic parts because they don't want people to know that they're different. I feel like for me This is only for me like literally for nobody else like I feel like that's Like I can't do that. Even if I feel weird about it. I What I don't want to hide it. I want people to know it's there And so I've never felt ashamed about it. I have felt very conspicuous and odd about it I feel weirder going out without it because like right now I can't wear it at all So when I'm out in public, it's just me and chopped off leg Which you don't see very often in public You definitely see amputees with prosthetic legs a lot more than people without any leg Natalie Jodlis writes What advice would you give to the caregiver of someone who recently went through an amputation? I think it's got to be really hard to be on that side of things I'm an amputee. So I like one through the surgery But I feel like the people who are taking care of us sometimes get forgotten and it's important to take care of yourself So I think that's what I would say if you are a caregiver of someone who's going through significant Anything make sure that you are taking breaks and taking time for yourself There is nothing wrong with calling in reinforcements calling in a friend or family member and be like hey Can you babysit this person not babysit? But you know adults it or just hang out with them for a couple hours while I go to the gym or hang out at a coffee shop Or take a walk or whatever like there is no shame in taking time for yourself because though It may seem like everything is about this person right now because there's so much energy being focused on them and in recovery It's okay to have a life still and things are still about you as well I was hoping that someone would ask this question. What other youtubers do I watch? Okay? I am very devoted to Kayla Nicholson I will link her channel down below. You know, I don't live my life like she does like I'm not mostly vegan I don't work out 24-7, but she's just such a lovely human being I also listen to a ton of Gary Vaynerchuk or Gary V if you know who he is He talks a lot about you know going after what you love in life. He also curses a lot He's a very interesting person. He's an entrepreneur and I just I love him. He's great I got to see him speak live earlier this year, which was awesome And then there were like 40 others that I love I'll link some of the other channels I like down below. Ila Carter asks am I restricted to only flat footwear. Yes Now I was thinking that after amputation the answer would be no because I could only wear flat shoes before because my ankle was fused Which means that essentially like my leg we're gonna pretend this my leg was screwed into my foot And so like it didn't move so I couldn't wear heels anything like a little bit would really hurt because it didn't move It put pressure on the other joints in my foot cause a lot of pain So I thought I could maybe wear things like I heels for the first time ever not true There are certain legs that allow you to like adjust the height of your foot But the first question my prosthetist asked me is would you like to be able to be active or wear high heels? And the answer was very obvious to me obviously be active like that's my life I love going out and doing things and hiking biking going to jitsu like taking my dogs out Way more important to me than wearing high heels So currently yes, I am restricted to flat feet if I ever had an extra 20 grand lying around that had no other good purpose Which would never happen. I would buy myself an extra leg so I could wear high heels, but that's not gonna happen Miss Sadie here Just looked extremely lonely and like she needed to play some tennis ball. So We're outside playing tennis ball with her by the way, please take note of the chewed corners of my house That's where lovely Sophie my other shepherd when she was a puppy The only thing she ever ever did wrong ever and we had her since she was seven weeks old But she decided to eat the house. She just ate just ate the house Have I gained or lost any friends since my amputation lost? No, absolutely none I think that's a real gift Sadie's like pushing me over Though I have gained some actually I've gained some amputee friends because I got involved with the new community Which is really awesome and I got way more connected with with acquaintances We previously had like for instance We had friends at our jiu-jitsu gym who like we were friends with me knew them in passing But as I was having my surgery they asked if they could bring us food over and so they did and we got along Super well and ever since then we've hung out with them a lot Which has been really really cool and I don't think we would have necessarily done that if they hadn't you know come over and Spent time with us where we were just friends and passing before and that's happened with more than one person a beautiful scenic YouTube background Isn't it next question? Do I consider myself disabled? That is a really good question, Kristen That's a hard word for me honestly because technically yes, I am I am part of the disabled community Sadie But I think it's a word that I'm in the process of figuring out what it means to me And making peace with I think that's really the only answer I have the definition of the word means that there are certain things that you can't do that there are abilities that you don't have and That's simply accurate like I can't walk on two feet anymore because I don't have them So I'm still in the process of figuring out exactly what that means to me And if that's part of I guess identity would be the word. All right. This is an excellent question What do I think of inspiration for now if you don't know what that is? It's like when people put together compilation videos on Facebook or stuff like that of people who are missing legs or missing arms or in wheelchairs But they're still doing things and isn't that awesome and you know, I used to see things like that used to watch things like that and Probably had a positive reaction to it and now I really don't like the argument like and if it helps people that's awesome But at the same time I think we change our perception a little bit and understand that people are amazing for all different reasons and also the Argument that someone is doing something and they're inspirational So you should do everything to just doesn't work because that's not how the world works and that's not how people work Marshmallow asks have I ever gone to school and talked about my amputation? No But that is something I'd really like to do talking to schools And other group situations is something I'd really like to expand into as I mentioned before I've done public speaking for years. It's something I'd really like to do more professionally because I really enjoy it I like it. I'm part of a toastmasters group, which is like a public speaking group I'm a nerd like that and I really like it. Sister JJ asks when I had the cast on was I nervous to know what it looked like underneath Yes, I know that many of you weren't here for my earlier videos But I think that having a cast on because a lot of amputees don't have a cast on after surgery They just have like bandages. I think having a cast on was like a good transition for me Because I could see that my leg wasn't there But I didn't have to see that my leg wasn't there immediately It was like covered for two weeks, you know and I got to kind of ease into it and adjust to the idea a little bit more instead of Immediately being faced with this new reality if that makes sense and I was scared to see it I was really freaked out the day of surgery. I'll link the video up above I took a video of the day actually one up to get my cast off And I thought I would like sob or break down or something like that and I didn't I was like actually okay I was way more adjusted to it than I thought I would be. I think the weirdness has come actually More lately than anything like after the wound is healed when I'm back in normal life I'm like, oh, this is what it's gonna look like forever That's been way more of an adjustment than being scared of what it looked like underneath the cast I'm being invaded by creatures everywhere for everyone who's wondering. This is our cat cake. That is Louis and over here We have Sadie actually a lot of the questions were about our pets. So there you go Alright cakes. You're gonna need to move. You're gonna see a cat tail again in a second But I don't know if you can tell I'm feeling a little out of it a little like migrainy Oh God cakes and I answer some questions, but if I seem a little out of it, I am so there you have it Ali asks what I ever do a video about my tattoos absolutely. I actually have eight I think you guys have only ever seen two and they're all super meaningful to me because I'm lame like that And I well, I won't get anything permanent when you on my body unless it means a lot to me So yes, expect a video like that in the future. How do you say please? I think that's the username says what helps you pull yourself out of bed on bad days So I have a lot of those as I talked about before When things get really dark or when I'm having a really hard time the easiest thing in the world is just to stay Safe under covers or safe on the couch the general wisdom is to do the opposite of what your body is telling you when like depression hits So if you feel like the only thing you should do is stay in bed and not talk to anyone It's generally a good idea to get out of bed and like text a friend or try to go do something now I don't think that works a hundred percent of time. I think sometimes you need to take a break However when things are really dark I think back to other dark days I've had where I was convinced and I mean convinced that nothing would ever ever ever be Okay, ever again, and then it was because I held on because I chose to make it through another day If I can manage it I will take a shower because if I can like feel more human by cleaning myself That usually helps that usually is like a step in the right direction And if I can at least take that step I can usually go a little bit further than that It's rose not rosy asks. That's a great username by the way. What's the best thing that happened to me this week? We got dinner with a couple friends who we were just acquaintances with and Had an awesome conversation and realized that we should be much better friends with them and that was lovely It's always good to have great conversations with people and really connect so that was awesome pause for just a second I pulled up Instagram to look at the question some more. Look at this guy Someone drew that of me. That seriously looks like me I am just blown away that someone took the time to do that. So thank you I will put their name on Instagram in the description down below Please go check them out and adrovica asked how much did my foot weigh so it's gonna be different for everybody They didn't actually like technically weigh mine when they took it off But mine it was probably between five and ten pounds somewhere like that For above knee amputees is obviously a lot heavier because your thigh is pretty weighty But I'm not a giant person. I'm five five and it was below knee So it was about like five or ten pounds somewhere in there real quick. I had an idea yesterday I wanted to ask you guys about it I was thinking about doing a YouTube live and bringing Brian in because a lot of these questions are about him and me I would love for him to like actually talk with you guys So like this video if you think that that would be something you would enjoy And it would obviously be recorded if you couldn't you know be there for the actual live time But let me know if that's an idea that you would be on board for and I think this migraine is gonna win today And I can no longer have the window open because it is getting worse. So with that I'm gonna say I love you guys You're amazing. Thank you for all your questions, and I cannot wait to talk to you in the next video. Bye guys. Oh, that is a very wet gross tennis ball