 Lookout World, Lindsay Lohan's back in a brand new film, Straight to Netflix, oh, called Irish Wish. Oh, the title. Yeah, I know what you're thinking, Adam, this is another cash scrap, Straight to Netflix, Pilot Crap, low effort, low energy, no budget whatsoever, just cashing in on the holiday for Lindsay Lohan's 500th comeback attempt. That's exactly what it is. That's exactly what it is, so let's talk about it. Did you know that if a video on YouTube is over eight minutes, you get extra ad revenue? I'm not sure I could talk about Irish Wish for eight minutes. But maybe if I padded out with Coke drinking and subscribed to the channel notification, we could get there. I think we can get there. Please subscribe to the channel, Adam Does Movies. Not only do I cover big movies, but also this shit that goes to Netflix and other streaming apps shows up on my front page, says it's ranked number one in the world right now, so I have to watch it. I have to see what the fuss is about, according to Netflix. It's never about anything. This stuff comes out, it's there for like a day or two, and then it's gone in the breeze, wafts away, never to be heard of, never to be spoken about again, kind of like Lindsay Lohan's career about 20 times. Yeah, we're gonna go full ham on this video. Let's talk about Irish Wish. Hey, you know what I wish for, Netflix? Trying to give a single iota of a fuck once in a while when you put out a movie. This is embarrassing. I sat- No, you know what's embarrassing? A grown-ass man putting on Irish Wish and wasting an hour and 25 minutes of his time. That's right. I don't think this one even hits an hour and 30 minutes, and that's the best thing I can say about the film. Occasionally, there's one or two decent vista shots. This is in Ireland, I think, or at least it's pretending to be. Lindsay Lohan's the star, there's other people in it, I guess. But let's talk about this plot, the rich plot that you're gonna get from this movie. For starters, this sets the table instantaneously with a couple sentences explaining how a magical wish can be granted to those that search it out, seek to find. And a magical fairy Irish godmother will come along and wave her wand and say, Fibbity-bobbity, bitch, you're going to the wedding of your dreams. And that's what this movie's about, but let's backtrack. So after a super, super-duper rushed introduction, with the title card just splatted on there willy-nilly, we get the opening scene, which takes place at night in the city, really just in a small little venue outside. Looks to be the back lot of whatever area of Hollywood they don't use anymore, some decrepit rundown place. They quickly swept up and said, Lindsay Lohan's here, roll out the carpet for Lindsay Lohan. And Lindsay comes out, she's like, hey everybody. And she trips and falls and breaks her leg, but gets back up and is like, I'm incorrigible. This is what I do in all my movies. I fall all the time. I'm so up in the air with things. I'm so George Clooney with things. He was in a movie called Up in the Air, subscribe. Seriously, Lindsay Lohan is the same character in every freaking movie. Fish out of water. Not sure what she's supposed to do. She's super wild, super fascinated and excited by everything. Wow, I'm so happy to be here. But she's also a klutz, falls over things, trips over her own patheticness. And then by the end of it, she's a little bit more confident, ready to take on the world. Ready to take on the life that she wants to have, but didn't think she could achieve it on her own. But turns out she actually can't sort of thing. Spoiler, that's exactly what she is here too. Irish Wish asks the tough questions. What if you could have your own wish granted? What would you do? Who would you screw? I think that's a DMX song. Y'all gonna make me lose my mind if you keep coming out with these crappy Netflix films. Our girl Lindsay plays Maddie here. She's a ghost writer for Paul, who's a renowned celebrity in the writing space. He's wrote a couple books. They're very well received. Number one author, but really it's her. She's really the number one author. She's really his lap dog at the end of the day, keeps her in her pocket, saves her for later, especially when there's another book on the horizon. If he says fetch, she runs after whatever it is he's tossing out there and she might come back with her heart one day. But she's too scared to make that plunge, to tell him how she feels. Even though her lovely mother, who she has several fun conversations with via FaceTime, literally always ensues. All of people don't know how to use phones. Laugh! Her mom gives her sage advice, which is to put her heart out there and tell James how she feels, but she won't. And alas, it becomes too late very soon when her best friend in him fall in love and tie the knot. Or at least they're about to tie the knot. That is, until Maddie goes up to a hill to pout for a little while, not realizing she's next to a magic wishing stone. A wishing stone that features a fairy Irish godmother who pops out and says, What would you like me lassie? That's, that's my, that's my attempt. And Maddie's like, I just wish I could find a ma- Ow! I hit my- Uh! Uh! Ow! Pshuh! Pshuh! Pshuh! Oh, I fell again. Laugh! Are you searching for your true love, little lassie? And she says, Yes ma'am, I am. I want to marry this guy, but my best friend is and I should be with him. It's not fair. And then the flowers rustle up. And the next thing you know, we freaky Friday this bitch. And she wakes up in a totally different scenario. She's now the one that's actually marrying him. Whaaat? Now, because this is literally every single hallmark movie ever made, done worse, we have a second guy in the mix. She's gonna run into a guy named James earlier in the flick. They're gonna have a little bit of chemistry there. Maybe a little bit of a push and pull situation where he kind of repels her, but at the same time, she's very attracted to him almost. Not really able to put her clit on why, but eventually it's gonna come to a head. That last expression was maybe a bit much, but who the hell's watching this video? It's Irish Wish. It's Irish Wish! What am I doing with my life? Why? As this movie unfolds, Maddie is gonna find out that this relationship that she thought she wanted to be in, this torrid love affair, this beautiful wedding, maybe not the one that she was meant to have. Maybe not the one... I thought I was gonna go somewhere a little bit more clever with, uh, I guess not. Bottom line is this isn't for her. She should be with that quirky guy that she ran into earlier and wouldn't look have it. He happens to be a photographer and wouldn't look also have it. This wedding party needs a photographer because they've been through several. Why? Because Paul's mom's the worst. Wipe out. I laughed like that because that's how the family laughs when one of the relatives says that very same thing. Mom, it's because you're the worst. That's right. This movie is full of canned laughter. Whenever a person says something that's not remotely funny, everyone else in the room goes, acting. Has it been eight minutes yet? Let's press on. In Christmas of 2022 on the precipice of 2023, Lindsay Lohan was in another holiday film, Falling for Christmas. That's right. I feel like she had a phone call, maybe a luncheon with one of her mean girl stars, Lacey Chabert. Lacey rolls up in her Maserati full of shopping bags, shades on the whole nine yards, cute little dog runs out and she says, listen, Lindsay, you need to go the Hallmark route. Okay. Mainstream movies, the whole A-list celebrity game. That's long gone. Look at me. I am Hallmark royalty. I was in 45 Hallmark movies last week. This shit is green screened and just reused over and over. Get into the Hallmark game. But Lindsay Lohan couldn't get in there. She had too much baggage of her own and not the kind you get at Macy's. She had some problems in her past life and so she needed to reinvent herself as a Netflix starlet in the Hallmark space. So we have this Christmas movie. We have Irish Wish. What's next? The sky's the limit as long as it's holiday themed and about love. We're going to have our starlet over there. Netflix is going to have their own Lacey Chabert. What is there to say about Irish Wish that really needs to be said at all? Nothing. If you like schlocky garbage films, I like some myself. That's fine. No judgment. Go to Hallmark. Watch them. They're there. They're bad. I mean, they're really terrible. It's all built up in algorithm at this point. Chat GPT is working extra innings to try to get this stuff out the door in time. What can we do this week? How about one where there's a city guy who's really highly paid, highly respected? He goes to a small town in the middle of butt-fuck America and all these locals are like, oh, I remember you graduated here 35 years ago. What have you been doing with your life? And the guy's like, shut up, old man. Shut up, you old hag. I'm just here to get some parts because my car broke down and then the local hottie comes out. Beautiful. Of course, white comes out. She's like, Jason? Jason, is that you or John? Jason, John? Something short, something stupid that people can remember. He's like, Elizabeth? It's been so long. It's been ages. You look great. So do you. Where are you staying tonight? I was just gonna maybe stay at a hotel if you know one. Well, as a matter of fact, I do. I run a bed and breakfast right down the road. Maybe something they could think about doing. I'm sure it hasn't been done 8,000 times. That's all of these movies. Every single one of these movies follows the playbook of either a city guy coming to a small town or fish out of water story where there's some random act of magic. And then it turns out there's a second man that's just as great. Night much better than the first. And that's what we have with Irish Wish. Budget hallmark edition. As far as Lindsay's performance, fine. She's kind of the same as she was in Mean Girls and Freaky Friday, Herbie fully loaded. I know too many movies with Lindsay Lohan apparently. She really hasn't changed since Parent Trap. It's all the same shit. She's just, she's so in shock. She's so amazed. She's klutzy. It's all the same crap. So yeah, I guess good for Lindsay for getting a paycheck. You know, she seems like a perfectly likable person. It's too bad her lawsuit with Rockstar didn't go anywhere many years ago when she sued for the likeness of a character on a picture looking like her, even though it didn't look anything like her. But yeah, I think she's making work and she's getting money. So that's great. This movie sucks. It's, it's absolutely shit. You can like shit. That's fine, but I didn't. I didn't like this movie at all. It's Irish Wish. Check it out on Netflix or better yet, don't. Go find yourself a wishing stone and say, I wish to never see this movie and maybe that's what it takes for you to avoid it. For me though, I'm doing the work for you. I'm doing the service of watching this trash so you can hopefully avoid it unless this sounds like something right up your alley. No jokes that land. No real action. No real comedy even at all. The romance is entirely superficial and half-baked. The plot, the concept, it's just wash, rinse, repeat, recycle from a million other Hallmark movies. And there you have it, Irish Wish. I could have done this whole review in 20 seconds, but I think we had to hit that eight minute mark for the ad revenue. So again, if you like or pity me, please subscribe to the channel, Adam Does Movies. I cover a wide range of films from the, from the large guys to these small little fish that you find flopping around at number one on Netflix for some reason. Please think about supporting the channel as a Patreon at patreon.com slash Adam Does Movies. There's multiple different tiers. They come with different perks. Oh, and if you want to do me a super thanks, you can just hit a super thanks button right under this video. Say, hey, Adam, here's a few bucks. I love this video. Keep doing your thing. And hopefully I catch you next time. Take care.