 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another video, Silent Mike here, Nature, that's why I come out here. I'm talking about health. I'm talking about food. I'm talking about eating out. We love food. I love food. Hopefully you love food. We're going to talk about how you can eat a little bit healthier out here at Mickey D's, America's Goodness, America's lovely fast food chain that's been around forever. Have you seen the movie Founders? Amazing film. Highly recommended. Backstabbing sons of bitches. We're hungry for money. And I get it. I want money too, but bring your friends along. And I guess they try to give them mixed feelings. I guess you guys have to see the movie. I have mixed feelings on who was in the right and who was in the wrong. One wanted to keep it mom and pop. One wanted to make a lot of money. They wanted to scale it up with them, but sometimes you get left behind, I guess. Don't get left behind, I guess, Mr. McDonald's. So when we're talking about healthy eating, healthy foods, I don't like the term healthy because, again, we have to start to have the same conversation. Everyone's talking, but we're having different conversations. We're talking about maybe what's healthy and maybe how you can lose weight. And so, of course, when we're talking health, general health, longevity, feeling good, making our bodies function well, we need to talk about micronutrients, vitamins, minerals, all these things are better found in fresh fruits, fresh vegetables, and homemade food most of the time. So when we're talking healthy eating at McDonald's, no, it's probably not the first go-around. If you have some nice fresh steamed broccoli and a nice little lean cut filet at home, you're probably going to be a little bit better off. But when we're talking about calorie deficit, when we're just talking about losing weight, feeling good, getting a little bit of protein in a meal in, we might be able to do that at McDonald's. And that's what we tried to do today. My fitness pal, a lot of different apps online, can allow you to track your food very easily. You can be a little bit flexible with it. Overall, does it have the micronutrients of a fresh steamed broccoli and steak meal? No. Does it have a little extra sodium? Yes. But, again, everything in life, moderation. Growing up as a kid, mom worked late every Wednesday. And I don't know if my parents had this kind of power. It might be some Illuminati shit. But maybe they had a conversation with McDonald's because every Wednesday for a while there, a hamburger was $0.25. I don't know if you guys remember that. And this isn't the old, I used to buy a hot dog and a soda pop with a nickel. This is 2000, probably year 2000, maybe late 90s. There was hamburgers for $0.25, I think just a quarter. So mom worked late until like 7 o'clock. I think dad, he always worked overtime. He would pick us up from like daycare or school or whoever was babysitting me late after school. I was probably 18. Just kidding. I was young. So we were being babysat or watched or whatever. We got picked up at 7 o'clock straight through the drive-thru. Not only did we get 25 cent burgers and I get like five of them growing boy, we also the Monopoly game. If you don't know about Chicken Nuggets, 25 cent hamburgers and playing Monopoly on the newspaper of McDonald's, you can get on out of here right now because that is America. That is my childhood. So this is like half of what I typically get. Look, I love a vanilla cone, but I got to go work out later. I love a McFlurry. I love all that. I love me a Big Mac. But we're trying to do moderation, trying to get to it. We want small fry. Great nickname. But I want small fry. This is the go-to. This is that new shit. When I'm talking about nostalgia, when I'm talking about the old good of a McChicken, I love one of my favorite foods and you guys can make the bland taste bud joke all you want. I love a good chicken nugget or a chicken strip from anywhere. Dip it in a little barbecue, dip it in a little ketchup. I absolutely love chicken. So I would rather have McNuggets, I guess was a long story short. But what we went with is the grilled artisan. Got a little bun here. It actually looks like a fancy bun. They're trying to make it look artisan, which means high class I believe here in McDonald's talk. It looks a little plasticky, but I've had it before. It tastes decent. Lettuce is looking a little sad. If this lettuce had an emoji face, it would probably be frowning. We have a tomato that actually looks pretty fresh, considering we're here at Mickey D's. Tomato looks fresh and to be quite honest, the chicken breast isn't looking too bad. So I'm going to take my wilted salad out of the picture for nostalgia. Why did you put it upside down? Look, I know you guys are getting paid not much. I know you're probably in high school, but just put it the right side. Don't they know that we're coming here to make content? When you order a hamburger, anywhere else in the world? You get such a little hamburger. A total of 20 chunks of onion, one pickle off-centered, seven dollops of mustard, and a nice squirt of ketchup. Little did they know. I guess they read minds. I love ketchup. I'm not a big mustard guy. I forgot to order it. And then the grayest, saddest burger you've ever seen in your life. But we're going to ignore that for nostalgia. Overall, probably a medium, moderate carb meal here, a little bit higher carb with these fries, but you've got to get fries when you go to Mickey D's. Come on. The chicken and the burger together, decent amount of protein, probably 50 grams or so. And then the fat, again, moderate. The burger's a little bit higher than the chicken. This chicken, if you want to go real low fat, you could hammer a couple of those. And then the fries bring up the fat a little bit. Sodium, again, if your sodium is in moderation day to day or meal to meal, you'll probably be okay. Yes, this is a little bit higher dose than a home-cooked meal. But if you're not eating this three, four times a day, you'll probably be just fine. And a Diet Coke to top it off because, you know, shreds life. That's what we're about here. I don't know who made the standard of burgers, but I believe the standard is what? Quarter pound, third pound, half pound burger. I'm not a scale, but typically it's just by the meat. And I think this entire thing is probably less than a quarter pound. That burger's, I don't know, centimeters well, but it's like an eighth of an inch thick. Normally a burger also, you can kind of order it how you want, right? Like medium, rare, rare, well done. And that goes by the color that's on the inside of the burger. We're just going to ignore that for this burger. I don't even want to look inside what type of color we have going on, but it's probably a nice grayish hue. These fries, people talk a lot of shit on them. Mike, they'll survive an apocalypse. You could throw that thing in the ocean and it'll come back and it'll be fully together. It won't absorb any water. Oh, that thing will outlive a cockroach. Oh, that thing's full of nuclear power. Yeah, and they're fucking delicious. So, you know, if you're eating them every day, watch yourself. But if you haven't known that, I'm into it. Now, we're talking French fries. It's a hard rating to give when we're talking about pure taste because there's such a variety of fry, right? We got the steak fry, the nice thick cut that actually looks like potato. You got the curly Q that looked like a little tail of a cute little piggy, even though it is not a piggy, it is potato. Those are some of my favorites. A lot of seasoning, a lot of crunch on the inside, some soft on the inside, some crunch on the outside, some soft on the inside. I think that's the goal when we're trying to get to any French fry. Steak fry, right? You want a little, it's obviously fried, so you want a little crispy on the outside, but the inside real potato-y, the diameter of the curly fry is a little bit less, so you don't get as much softness, but you can still sense that the outside is protecting the inside morsel of warm potato. Now we're kind of going to the regular French fry world. Things do become a little bit more bland, and that's when the ketchup gets involved. And when you're talking scalability here, when you're talking, you know, in and out, potatoes are probably a little fresher, but you're talking Burger King, you're talking McDonald's, you're talking Wendy's, you're talking kind of the, you know, the first tier A1, A single A ball of fast food. McDonald's still reigns the king. They still reign the king. It's a quality French fry that will tickle your taste buds with consistency every single time you order it. Is it the best fry in the world, though? Is it consistent and nostalgic? Fuck yeah. On an anabolic scale of fast food, the fry is probably like one out of nine. You know, it's a little good pre-workout, I guess, because some salt can give you a little bit of a pump, but talking about macro and micronutrients is probably not the direction we want to go. Moving on to the burger, I probably haven't had a McDonald's burger in, let's count it a decade. It's probably been a decade. First thing you notice is that the bread, although it looks very fake, tastes pretty decent, and you get a nice, you get a nice mixture, even though they only have five onions on there, one pickle, a dollop of mustard and a wad of ketchup. It is actually a good balance, a good ratio. What I would say is the ratio of bread is a little hot. When we're talking total taste, again, we have to talk about, we're almost below one a single ball, because this is the sad representation of a burger. There's no real meat. I'm the guy that wants at least a two to one ratio of bread to burger, and this is probably like a five bread one burger here, so one that brings our scale a little bit down, two it's in a different league, right? You go Big Mac, at least you got double burger. I guess when you go McDonald's, the general rule of thumb is you should probably always go double patty just to make up that ratio, because if you don't have that ratio, I don't think we can call it a burger. I think that's what we're getting at. So, whatever it is I just ate, even though the ratio of flavors taste okay, the texture is not, there is too much bread. On a scale of one single A, fast food burger, the most basic thing, this is probably the first thing McDonald's ever made, whatever, in the 50s, 60s. We're going to give it, we're going to give it a 4.1 out of 8. 4.1 out of 8. On an anabolic scale, considering that my body probably cannot digest or absorb anything I'm eating, besides maybe this chicken breast, it's probably going to also be a 1 out of 10. It's going to be a 1 out of 10 on an anabolic fast food. Very least, if I put a different logo right here, and this said Mike's mom and pop, artisan chicken sandwich, and you guys opened it, I think it's believable. Besides the one random french fry that I spilled in there, and the wilted lettuce, this is a believable sandwich that you could get at a reputable place. And I'm not meaning here to bash all the McDonald's lovers. I like a little McDonald's of my life, again, nostalgia. The taste overall is still solid. I mean, we just bought half of the menu, and it cost me $10. There's some miracles in McDonald's, but I actually like food, all right? I actually like food. I'm not a chef, I'm not a professional taster, although my mom does have a professional palate, so it's in me somewhere. I like good food, I think I have a good taste buds. I think I know what's good, what's bad, what's shit, and what's decent. And on the scale of chicken sandwich or the scale of burger, we know what we're dealing with here. That's why I'm putting it out there. Let's all step into the same league. We can't compare apples with oranges, even though some people can if you're saying your favorite fruit, but beside the point, let's dig in. My fault. We'll get there. There you go, it's my fault. I won't chew this way. Now people, have you picked up the latest glamour magazine, shape magazine, men's health, whatever? Oftentimes, they start talking about the devil in the sauces, right? There's condiments. There's a lot of calories that we don't necessarily need. Lucky for me, I'm not a huge fan of condiments in general. I like a little ketchup, little barbecue, something like that. Not a male guy, not a mustard guy, even though mustard's not that calorie dense. I'm not big on sauces. So this normally comes with a vinaigrette on it, and I think it's an aioli of some nature. Aiolis typically are pretty fatty, so I got no aioli. I guess overall it's a bad choice. That was a little bit dry. McDonald's so good a fly will eat it. It's a little bit dry without the aioli. So I guess if you guys want to be flexible in your dieting, probably keep the aioli in there just for texture reasons. But overall, it's a good ratio. The bread's a little bit better than this bread. It takes a little bit more real. And the chicken itself, although dry as dirt, tastes like I just bit into a poor pigeon that's been walking through the Mojave Desert for 10 weeks straight, not a drip of water, trying to get a drip of water from some cactus. But it tastes like chicken. At one point, this was a real chicken. I don't know how long ago. I think that's the real issue here. These flies are really trying to get on my Mickey D's. Don't touch the Mickey D's nuts, right? No? So they're pretty, it's pretty good. It's pretty good. And this is typically, I've probably been to McDonald's four, five times over the last year or so. But one time I had to get the chicken nuggets from my kid, from my childhood, the inner mic. I love chicken nuggets. But the other times when I'm trying to eat a little bit healthier, I do go here because it's good amount of protein. Taste like, you can look at that. That looks like a chicken you cook at home, you know? It's fully cooked through. It's a real chicken breast. The bread's actually really solid. And I showed you that tomato. That tomato was rock solid. Now what I forgot to do at McDonald's, I think they have a new burger out. It's supposed to be premium. They say it's like real beef. Like, oh, then what's this other one, right? We should have got that to try it, but that about wraps it up. On the taste of, let's throw this into the big leagues. Hey little buddy, you ready to go to the big leagues? He's ready to go to the big leagues. So all chicken sandwiches across the world, scale out of 10. This chicken sandwich, this artisan chicken sandwich is still a four out of 10 chicken sandwich. It's still a four out of 10. Could I go to a random cafe and probably get a better one? Yes, that's probably gonna be the five out of five. But for the convenience, for the price, for the memories, the history of the drive-through factor, four out of 10 is not bad, Mickey D's. On the anabolic scale of fast food gains, the artisan chicken sandwich gets a seven out of 10. Seven out of freaking 10, eat the artisan chicken sandwich, get swole, my friends. That was what you were looking for. I'm not too happy.