 Hi guys, are you applying to UNC's medical program? If you are and want some guidance on the second areas, stay tuned. Hi, my name is Dr. Josie. This is Write Your Acceptance. I work with students on personal statements and secondary editing. More than that actually, it's kind of content, generation, and phrasing and how to really establish yourself on the page so you are as competitive as possible. So if you want to learn more about that and how I work with students because you're in the process, get your free 15 minute consult with me in the description below. We have the personal statement guide. You have a deep dive workshop. So you have all these goodies in the description below. But if you are here for UNC, stick around. Let's get started. So first I want to say thank you to Dr. Rex. I will link his YouTube channel below. He shared, he so graciously shared his essays with us. And so that is what we're workshopping today. So let's get started. So the first prompt. Describe a situation or an experience you've had when you were unsuccessful. Tell us what you learned from this experience. So these are 1000 character essays, right? So kind of blurbs. And so this is what he wrote. And then let's talk about it. During my sophomore year, I attempted to organize a fundraiser sports camp to benefit women and their children receiving substance at use disorder treatment from UNC horizons. This population is one I care deeply about and very much wanted to help. Unfortunately, I was unsuccessful at accomplishing this for a variety of logistical reasons. I generally take pride in my ability to organize events, but this proved to be a case where I overextended myself and had to admit that I failed. However, I do not think this was a wasted effort. I met some amazing people and learned a lot about an equally amazing organization. Additionally, I learned in hindsight, how important it is to not try to do tasks on my own. I was trying to plan things myself, even though I had resources available to me that I could have utilized. Since this experience, I have always been willing to reach out to others for help and utilize resources that are accessible to me. So short and sweet, right? These 1000 character blurbs don't really kind of give you much space to stretch and describe a couple of things are kind of happening that I like in this response. We get the purpose of the kind of task, right? What it was for and kind of working with horizons and how that was important to them. We also get very kind of plainly plain. I mean very directly how they quote unquote were unsuccessful or how they failed. And so a lot of times I find that students want to kind of paint such a pretty picture about themselves and you do. You want to showcase your best self, but if they're kind of directly asking you for a setback, an obstacle, a failure, sometime you felt unsuccessful, you want to kind of not gloss over that and just give this like rosy colored glasses type response. So I appreciate that they kind of are very direct, that he is very direct and that he kind of explained what his shortcomings were. I do feel like there is some room for improvement in paragraph two. For example, I met some amazing people and learned a lot about an equally amazing organization. I would have swapped that out for two or three sentences where we can really humanize the event and we can really see kind of a couple of amazing people. Why are they amazing? How did they connect with the student? So I would like to see that kind of particularity, that kind of detail and it also offers kind of some image driven sensory language that would punch up the narrative. Prompt two. Give an example of how you made a difference in someone's life and explain what this experience taught you about yourself. Also 1,000 characters. So last year I made a difference in the life of first year student whom I met through my church by being a friend to her and helping her as she adjusted to college while suffering from depression and anxiety. Anyone was not qualified to give her all the help she needed but I connected with the resources and walked with her to counseling and psychological services. More significantly, I went on long walks with her whenever she falls overwhelmed and just needed to escape and many times stayed up late just to be with her so she did not have to cry alone. This experience taught me how I can better relate to others beyond understanding and sharing in the feelings and experiences of another person. This experience helped me actually see myself in my friend because I had been in similar circumstances before. Furthermore, this taught me that the biggest differences I can make in some people's lives do not require any special skills but only to be there for them when they need it. Okay, so another successful essay, right? There were a couple things that I really really like in this prompt. In the first paragraph, he really kind of focuses on what was his role in her journey, right? I think it's important to know your limits in what you can and cannot do especially if you're talking about someone's mental health, if you're helping someone physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically. I like that the student kind of is very honest about the limitations of their direct intervention and also how they kind of are our support system in very specific ways. I can see a relationship flourishing in a very kind of authentic, genuine dynamic way. And then paragraph two, I really appreciate how the essay gets bigger. What I mean is that the kind of reflection goes beyond this experience. So this experience helped me actually see myself in my friend because I had been in a circumstance, okay, I wouldn't say more of that personally, that's just kind of my opinion. But then further, this taught me that the biggest differences I can make in someone's life and then they kind of talk a little bit about how they can be a support system to anyone. And so it really shows the student's ability to critically think about and assess their experiences and how they kind of take that valuable knowledge and apply it elsewhere and kind of make it a practicing trait for them. Problems three, what motivates you to apply to UNC School of Medicine? So another 1000 character essay. This one I have very specific feedback on. So here we go. Over the past three years, UNC has truly become my home. Something I've always valued is building a sense of community with where I am. That is something I've tried to do with my relationships to the Carolina community, the UNC Newman Catholic Student Center parish, my classmates, Carolina housing and UNC athletics. I've come to love these communities and not ready to leave them. Additionally, as a UNC undergrad, I have already gotten to experience a part of the wonderful caliber of professors and classmates I can expect to have at UNC Medical School. During the time I've spent in and around the UNC hospitals, I've only met outstanding doctors and nurses that I would love to work alongside someday. For these reasons, UNC School of Medicine is the most obvious medical school I can see myself thriving at. So this is a very personal reflection, right? A very personal essay. They attended UNC for undergrad, so they have these very specific experiences that they can draw upon. Amazing if that is your journey. However, most students for the most part will not be applying to UNC from UNC undergrad. A lot will, but a good chunk may not, right? And so if you are not, your essay, your kind of why us essay should be very, very different. You want to make sure and so if you want a little bit more information on a why us secondary, I have my template in the description below. You can grab that there, but you want to make sure that it is kind of information driven, right? So as many details as possible. You want to look at their research, what their curriculum looks like, what are community service activities that students can get involved with? What are the student run clinics? What is kind of like the living and learning environment and culture of the program? So really kind of arm yourself with that type of information for a why us for UNC or any other. Do you have questions on your secondary essays? Comment below. I'd love to help you out. All right. So this is prompt for UNC School of Medicine values diversity and inclusion across the institution. We believe that education and professional development are enhanced in educational settings that include individuals from diverse backgrounds and experiences. Please describe how your background and or experiences would contribute to the UNC SOM community 1000 characters. This is what Dr. Rex said. My most unique experience that will contribute to the UNC SOM community is being a student athlete, particularly a wrestler. As a student athlete, I have had to make a conscious effort to prioritize and balance all aspects of my life. I believe that maintaining balance is an important attribute for success in medical school that I will share with my classmates. Additionally, I view challenges as how they can be accomplished as a team. Success in athletics comes from communicating with teammates, her trusting in them and pushing them to become better. This is also how I believe the best medical care is provided through a collaborative team effort. Lastly, I believe as a wrestler, I bring focus and drive to accomplish tasks that is unique among most students. I am not afraid of failure, adversity or any challenge and I'm willing to put in any amount of work to accomplish a goal. Not only will this drive help me personally, but I will use it to help inspire my classmates to succeed as well. I appreciate how different this response is. I think more and more we're getting secondaries that are asking about how do you diversify our student profile? What diversity do you bring? How do you practice inclusion, social justice? So we're getting a lot of kind of diversity and inclusion type language in our prompts in secondaries. I appreciate and applaud Rex for kind of taking a different spin on this because it doesn't always have to be about ethnicity or race or cultural difference. It can be. And by all means, if that is how you practice and you identify your diversity and you kind of contribute in a meaningful way, you should explore that, but you don't have to necessarily, right? You can talk about how your background, how you're upbringing, how your values and very specific ways will help shape a diverse student population right in their program. And so I think Rex does that very nicely. I also like how towards the end there's a shift in perspective, right? I really like that because it gives kind of like solid lessons. So for example, this is also how I believe the best medical care is provided through a collaborative team effort. So Rex really kind of opens up the, the answer. So I did this kind of not in order, but I wanted to kind of go over all of the prompts first. And then if you are applying to UNC and you have that why UNC essay prompt this coming cycle, but you didn't attend, right? And you want to do something slightly different. These are a couple of tidbits on UNC that I thought were really interesting. The last two essays. So the why UNC and then the diversity essay, I think should really kind of have something program specific that not only shows your fit into the program, but how you would kind of really take advantage of their offerings and of their programs and how you fit in, right? So it's not only all about them, but it's a little bit about you for the why us. And it's not only all about you in the diversity, but maybe a little bit about them too. So just a tidbit, right? Right on the front page is an equity newsletter. So you know, and it outlines their new hires, their actual initiatives, you know, this is top of mind. And so I think that that prompt that asking you kind of how do you contribute to that conversation is key. They have a rural primary care scholars program and they play students in rural areas in North Carolina. It's kind of to really take advantage and expand a kind of a diverse primary care workforce. They also kind of, you know, support students in very interesting ways through the training academia, health research. It's an office of inclusive excellence. So you do have kind of support system built in through STAR with an H, S, T, A, H, R. They have cluster mentoring and that kind of curriculum focuses on identity development, psychological support, social support, academic professional development, sense of belonging, so community and kind of being different together, right, is of interest. And then another thing that I tell students, if you're writing a why us, you want to maybe kind of take a peek at the student profiles. So who is actually attending or who just attended? What are they working on? And so maybe you mentioned, maybe you contact a student, maybe you mentioned one of the students and what they're kind of focused on beyond the classroom as a way to kind of show how you would be interested in expanding a program or kind of continuing that work. So for example, Celeste Brown co-founded White Coats Black Doctors, an organization to celebrate, unite and uplift black medical students and physicians. And then kind of, you know, step three also learn the types of facilities available and the kind of technologies and types of research you can do there. I'll link all of the kind of websites for these pointers below. I hope this was helpful. Hope the essay breakdown was helpful. Please give us a like if you have another program you want to kind of run through together, name that program in the comments. Thank you again, Rex. I'm going to link his channel. It is fantastic and you can kind of kind of live through the journey with him, which is great. If you need help on your personal statement or secondaries and want to know how I work with students, definitely schedule your free 15 minute call and we'll talk soon. Take care. Bye.