 Step number two is taking ownership for your role. So this can be in a few different ways. Number one, it can just be in general, when you ask for the counseling, say, look, I would like to work on our relationship. I know that I have not been the best husband and best wife. I'd like to be a better spouse. Um, and I like to learn that together with you. So we're getting them to join with you as opposed to putting the blame on them. Yeah. So much less threatening. It's, it's, you know, it's so much less threatening to use I statements. And even though you may not want to say, I know I've been not the best spouse to you because they're equally to blame. It shows that you're willing to take ownership for your piece. Right. And that's, that's a little bit safer. So it's like, okay, like, so you're not just bringing me to therapy to change me. And I think for a lot of men, it's, uh, men in general don't like to share their feelings. You don't like to go to therapy. It's, you know, women are much better at in general. So people are reluctant as is. So if you feel like you're coming to change them and fix them, forget it. So the more that you can take ownership, the better.