 وَأَقُولُوا فِي القُرْآنِ مَا جَاءَتْ بِيهِ اَيَاتُوهُ فَهُوَ الْكَارِيمُ الْمُنْزَالُوَ وَأَقُولُوا قَالَ اللَّهُ جَلَّ جَلَالُوهُ وَالْمُصْطَافَ الْهَاديِ وَلَا أَتْ أَوْوَالُوَ الحمد لله رب العالمين والصلاة والسلام على المبعوث رحمة للعالمين نبينا محمد وعلى آله وصحبه أجمعين السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته مرحباً لكم في هذه المسلمة المسلمة هذه المسلمة التي سنتحدث عنها is all about the parents and there is no doubt whatsoever that this is the greatest of all of the rights after the right of Allah there is no right greater than the right of the parents after the right of Allah and that would have suggested that perhaps we should have put this at the beginning of the course but we structured the course chronologically going through the beginning of creation Adam and Hawa, marriage and then children and then the child is brought up to treat the parents well and so in terms of chronology that's why we reached Birol Wali Day towards the end of the course and what we're going to talk about today is this whole concept of Birol Wali Day we hear this word a lot and we also hear frequently the word إحسان و بالواليدين إحسانة so let's start by looking at the linguistic meaning and the Islamic understanding of Birol Wali Day and الإحسان إليهما being good to them and having Birol towards them so let's have a little look at what this means in terms of the language and in terms of the Islamic definition so the word بير لنوستيكلي the verb itself it can be used for صلاحة it can be used for أطاعة it can be used for صدقة so it can refer to الصدق الصلاحة الطاعة الخير الصلاحة and so on so it can be used to refer to truthfulness or being true towards someone and it can be used for obedience the word البير meaning الطاعة and it can be used for أنواع الخير all of the types of good and goodness towards someone الفضل grace towards someone and it can be used for الصلاحة keeping ties with someone these are some of the linguistic meanings around the word البير and the person who has that attribute they are called بار رن or they are called بار رن either بار or بار and the plural being أبرار or بررة and the angels are called بررة كيرامن بررة so the angels are described with this characteristic of البير here referring to their obedience and referring to the good that they only do good so they are described with this term الباررة because of their طاعة their obedience to Allah the خير and the good that they do so this is a general word and it's one of the most comprehensive words that you can see even in terms of its usage in the Qur'an it's a very comprehensive word that covers all kinds of good and that's why راغب العصف هاني رحمه الله تعالى he said that البير is التوسر في الخير والطاعة he said it is to go to be expansive to be vast in goodness and obedience he said it is a توسر to really go to a large extent in الخير in goodness and in الطاعة in obedience and that's why المناوي رحمه الله تعالى he said وبر الوالد he said that بر as it relates to the والد as it relates to the parent is التوسر في الإحسان إلي it is to really go to the utmost extent in إحسان towards that parent وَتَحَرِّ مَحَابِّه and to really seek out everything that they love وَتَوَقِّ مَكَارِهِ and to keep yourself away from everything that they would dislike وَرِفْقُ بِهِ and to be soft and gentle with them وَضِدُهُ أَلْعُقُوْقُ and the opposite of it is وَلْعُقُوْقُ so we see how vast this word is and how vast this concept of بر الوالد is that the word بر it indicates التوسر في الإحسان even لغة and linguistically التوسر في الخير التوسر في الإحسان being very vast really going to the utmost extent in good in إحسان and we're going to come to that word in a moment in التاعة in obedience in الخير in goodness and he gave examples of that he said that you are seeking out everything that person loves everything that parent loves you're looking for it and seeking it and trying to achieve it across every spectrum this is something worse here it's very expansive so in every single area of their lives and your life you're seeking to do what they love and you're keeping yourself away and being careful to protect yourself from anything they would dislike not talking about something necessarily has to be hard on anything they would dislike being soft to them and being kind to them in speech in mannerisms in the way even in the way that you disobey them it is obligatory for the Muslim to have aرفق with the wallet with the parent even in the way that you disobey them even when you have to obligatory it is obligatory upon you and you have to disobey them in Islam you do so with aرفق and الإحسان with goodness and kindness and gentleness and he also told us at Munawi that the opposite of البر is الإحسان is to be bad to your parents and this is among the worst of the major sins and we're going to hear some of the evidences for this so this the word البر as we heard from these definitions is it is a comprehensive word and it covers الكلام والفعل والمال حتى ما في القلب it covers how you speak how you behave it covers how you spend your money and spending upon them and it even covers what is in the heart how you feel towards them and the love that you have for them the care you have for them and the priorities that you have for them the way that you they come first in your heart this even this comes under the word البر so it is a very comprehensive concept and الموارد رحمه الله تعالى he said البر ونوعان صلة ومعروف he said that بر is of two types generally the word not necessarily related to بر والدي he said صلة and this refers to wealth and معروف which refers to القول والعمل so we're talking about things you say things you do and even the spending of wealth in فاق and we're also talking about الأمور القلبية the matters of the heart all of this comes within the topic of البر as for الإحسان رحمه الله تعالى he said الحسن عبارة عن كل منهج مرهوب فيه he said that الحاء and the scene in the noon here refer to everything every way which is desirable every desirable thing or every desirable way of doing something it can be referred to with this word الحسن or الإحسان والإحسان يقالوا على وجهين he said that there are two ref or two meanings broad meanings for the word إحسان أحدهما الإنعام الإنعام على الغير والثاني إحسان في فعليه وذلك إذا علم علم حسنة أو عمل عمل حسنة he said إحسان can be referred to two things one is to give more to someone give extra to someone or to bless to bless someone إنعام to give someone more than what they more than what they would expect or more than what they would than would be like what they deserve or would be like a one for one so this is what you say about to go beyond and to go further than the expectations so this is one of the meanings of إحسان towards someone to go beyond to exceed the expectations and to give them more than they give you and the second is to have إحسان i.e. to perfect an action when someone learns some knowledge which is good and does an action which is good we say to them أحسنة أحسنة you did something good so to perform an action which is complete and good and to give someone more than what they would expect these are two of the meanings or two of the primary meanings behind the word behind the word إحسان and رغب الاصفة هاني he said رحمه الله تعالى regarding the statement of Allah إن الله يأمر بالعدل والإحسان indeed Allah commands العدل which is justice he said فالإحسان فوق العدل وذلك أن العدل هو أن يُعطي ما عليه ويأخذوا ما له والإحسان أن يُعطي أكثر من ما عليه ويأخذ أقل من ما له he said that is because العدل justice is a person taking what or giving what they have to give and taking what is theirs to take but إحسان is to give more than what they have to give and to take less than what they have to take and we're going to see both meanings of إحسان as it relates to إحسان إلى الوالدين we're going to see this concept even especially when we come to talk about بر الوالدين among the Salaf Al-Saleh you see them going to an extent of بر الوالدين that a person it's hard to even imagine it's hard to even imagine and you also see across all of the stories and the examples that we're going to bring إن شاء الله تعالى the striving for excellence and perfecting that particular إبادة that is an Ibadah towards Allah إِنَّ حَأَتَّهَيَسْتَ so both of these are meanings of the word إحسان and also while we're talking about meanings it's also important to talk about the word الوالد and that's because from among the people of knowledge are those who say that الوالد it doesn't just limit itself to your parents rather it includes your parents and all of the ascendance above them so your grandparents and your great grandparents all of them linguistically come under the come under the title الوالد or given the name الوالد that is the father and the grandfather so likewise we want to make people understand that even though no doubt the parent the mother and the father have that special place in Islam that there is also بر الوالدين that has to be done towards the grandparents and the great grandparents as well if they are still alive that isn't excluded from the concept of بر الوالدين because the والد is the father or the parent وإن على and all of those who go upwards all of them who go upwards and Insha'Allah to Allah later on we're going to come to talk about the relatives and that's another segment the issue of أول الأرحام the people who are related to you your relatives we're going to talk about that إن شاء الله تعالى a bit later on in the course insha'Allah so let's come on to talk about بر الوالدين in the Quran بر الوالدين in the Quran الله عز وجل He said وعبد الله ولا تشرك به شيئة وبالوالدين إحسانة وبيذ القربة وليتامة والمساكين والجارذ القربة والجار الجنوبي والصاحب والسبيل وما ملكت أيمانكم هذه صورة النساء آية نمى 36 الله عز وجل ورشب الله ونفعل أي شخص with him وكون جيد to your parents سبحان الله first of all الله عز وجل begins the آية with his حق his right وعبد الله this is the right of Allah عز وجل all the His servants like the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said to أتدري ما حق الله على العباد وما حق العباد على الله do you know what the right of Allah is over his servants and the right of the servants is over Allah قال خلط الله ورسوله عالم he said Allah and his messenger no best and the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said حق الله على العباد أن يعبدوه ولا يشركوا به شيئة the right of Allah over his servants is they worship him and they don't make any partner with him this is the greatest of all the حق and this is the religion of Islam and it is العروة الوثقات the trustworthy handhold that will never break and it is the meaning of لا إله إلا الله وعبدو الله ولا تشركوا به شيئة worship Allah and don't make any partner with him but look at how Allah عز وجل joined between his right and the right of the parents to show you that there is no right there are no حقوق there is no right or no rights on the face of this earth or in this religion of Islam greater than the right of the parents after the right of Allah عز وجل and this also benefits us that when there is a تعارل a contradiction between the rights of Allah and the rights of the parent the rights of Allah come first the rights of Allah come before everything and everyone else but after the right of Allah عز وجل there is no greater right than the right of the parent وابل واليديني إحسانة and to your parents do good now here the word واليدين the two parents it covers the father and the mother and it covers the two of them together and we're going to hear in other ayat about the fact that the right of the parents is not only when they are together even when they are separate the right each one of them still has their right but here it doesn't limit the واليدين to الواليدين المسلمين the two Muslim parents it is general and that's why we're going to hear also later on that there is no specific ruling about limiting this to the Muslim however the Muslim has an additional right over you the right of the parent and the right of Islam and so on but even the parent that is not a Muslim we're going to hear إن شاء الله as we move through the ayat and the Ahadith even the parent that is not a Muslim still has that right over you and Allah as we said إحسان to your parents to إحسان and we've heard إحسان is to have excellence in every way that you deal with them that every aspect and we said القول الفعل الإنفاق الأمور القلبية the things you say the things you do the money you spend the affairs of the heart all of it towards your parent should be إحسان it should be at the highest standard of what Islam expects from you rather the word إحسان also indicates going beyond إن الله يأمر بالعدلي والإحسان Allah commands justice and he commands إحسان الإحسان to do what you have to do and الإحسان to go beyond what you have to do and you see from the understanding of the Salaf Al-Saleh رحمه الله و تعالى that which makes it crystal clear that they understood that a person should go beyond even the the basic kind of things that you would expect a child to do for a parent so you find one of them would put his face on the ground and tell his mother stand put your feet upon my rest your feet upon my cheek و بالوالدين إحسان سبحان الله and this is not by any means the most emphatic example among the actions of the Salaf رحمه الله و تعالى so you are commanded to have excellence in every single aspect of the way you deal with your parents everything from the way you speak to them the things you do for them the things you don't do because they asked you not to do them your obedience to them because we said it covers obedience and the way that you spend and the way that your heart is towards them and your softness in all of these you should have excellence and then you should aim to go even beyond what they would expect and that is why when we talked about the definition that was given earlier on talked about تحرى تحرى محاب بي تأ a person actually actively seeks out the things that make their parents happy and instinctively knows و توقع مكاره and instinctively knows the things that make their parents sad the person it's not إحسان for the parent to have to ask the child to do something this is an idol this is you know fairness the parent says bring me a glass of water and the child brings the parent a glass of water this is an idol but it's not إحسان this is not what الله عز وجل commanded الإحسان is that you bring your parent the water before they ask for it that's إحسان you bring it to them before they ask for it because you are actively searching out the things that they like you know what they need before they have to ask for it for all life they have to ask for it this is this is a تقصير في حق الوالد this is deficiency as it relates to the right of the parent and it doesn't come under the full meaning of the word إحسان the full meaning of the word إحسان would indicate that you give your parents what they want and what they need and you avoid what they dislike before they even say the words that's what إحسان is so yes إحسان is to excel that you are obedient that when you when they tell you to do something you do it and so on but it's more than that it's also about being ahead of what they ask you to do and actively looking that what would make my mom happy today what would make my dad happy today what would my mom dislike from the things that I'm doing or even if they didn't say because some of the parents maybe they have حياء they're too shy to say to their children that's something they don't like so they maybe keep it quiet maybe they keep it inside of themselves so a person actively thinks what am I doing that I know maybe I feel that my parents wouldn't like and even those things they leave and the word إحسان here in the آية is general it's not there's no particular kind of إحسان specified because this is أم it's a kelly which is أم it's general for every kind of action and that's why Allah didn't specify it He didn't say a kind of إحسان و بالوالدين إحسانا you know for example in what you say in what you do or إحسانا in the way you treat them while this is from the most generic of terms it covers and we said like the word إحسان the word البر these are كلمات جامعة these are words and phrases that are completely general and cover literally every single thing in the spectrum و بالوالدين إحسانا and that's why it was kept general وبيذ القرباء and to your relatives وليتامة و المساكين till the end of the آية look at the system of the organization of the society in Islam what a beautiful system this can only be a system which came from the Lord of the heavens and the earth because there is this the way this is organized و الله this آية on its own is enough for a person to accept Islam if this is the only آية they had because if you سبحان الله how Allah عز وجل organized the society everyone getting their rights first of all the right of Allah our society our مجتمع is built upon the rights of Allah before everything and anyone else then the right of the parents and they're the most deserving of the people of you fulfilling their rights and then the relatives each one of them according to how near they are each one of them according so their brothers the sisters the uncles and the aunts and then outwards to the cousins and then outwards and outwards and looking after the آية و المساكين the orphan who doesn't have perhaps they don't have the orphan is the one that their father passed away before they reached the age of puberty and maybe some of them perhaps their mother even passed away as well and they don't have the the valid to to look after them and take care of them and protect their interests and the مساكين the one who is so poor that they have they've been afflicted by المسكين and their destitute and the الجار القربة the neighbor that is a relative of yours or صاحبي بالجمب and the one that works with you or is next to you in travel or at your workplace or in your school وابن سبيل and the one who is cut off from their their wealth and they might be wealthy but they're traveling and they don't have access to it وَمَا مَلَكَتْ إِمَانُكُمْ even the people who are enslaved سبحان الله look at the way Islam gave rights to all of them each one of them organized in a perfect organization and in a perfect organization each one of them given the rights that they have to be given فأعطي كل ذي حق الحق give everyone who has a right over you their right so a person should be grateful to Allah عز وجل for this religion of الإسلام and they should recognize the perfection and the wisdom حكمة بالغة and infinite wisdom that exists in the next episode we're going to continue on إن شاء الله about the بير الواليدين إن قرآن and إن شاء الله perhaps we can move on a little bit to بير الواليدين in the sunnah of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم that's what Allah made easy for me to mention and Allah knows best صلى الله عليه وسلم على نبينا محمد وعلى آله وصحبه أجمعي السلام عليكم if you're enjoying these videos and you'd like to keep up to date with all of the courses we're going to be running make sure you head over to amauathome.com