 The Kraft Foods Company presents Willard Waterman as the Great Gilded Sleeve. The Great Gilded Sleeve is brought to you partially transcribed by the Kraft Foods Company. Kraft, makers of Velvita, the famous pasteurized processed cheese food that tastes so good and is so good for you. Velvita is another of the Kraft family of fine foods. Foods you can depend on for delicious eating, for wholesome healthy eating. So remember, to get the pasteurized processed cheese food of quality, get Velvita made only by Kraft. Well, it's getting close to the first of the month, the time when a great many people start worrying about their bills. But to Summerfield's water commissioner, it's the time when he starts worrying about how Mayor to Williger will receive his monthly water report. Well, that's it, Mr. Mayor. All 19 pages of it. What do you think, Your Honor? It's an excellent report, Gilded Sleeve. Well, thank you. I checked it very carefully. And there's not a single misspelled word. Very commendable. And the addition seems to be unusually accurate. Yes, sir. Last month, if I recall, 7 and 12 made 10. I can explain that, Mr. Mayor. I added the number of the page to something we bought on the 10th of the month. Yes, I see. You'll notice this month that I've kept the expenses down. The water commissioner doesn't let the city's money leak through his fingers. Well, Gilded Sleeve, this is a very good report. Thank you. With one exception. Oh? This month I notice our consumers haven't used as much water. Well... The revenue has fallen off. How do you account for it? Well, it's there for them to use. I can lead a customer to water, but I can't make him drink. Yes, but you're the city water commissioner. I depend on you to keep things humming. After all, it's city revenue that pays your salary. Let's look to it, Gilded Sleeve. Well, I thought I had a good report, Mr. Mayor. Grammatically, yes. Financially, no. Good day. Goodbye, Mr. Mayor. You are a little powder pigeon. You couldn't find anything wrong with my report. So he's blaming me because people don't use more water. Mr. Gilded Sleeve? You say there's Bronco. Go in, Bronco. Oh, how are you this morning? Great, my boy. How are my's re in the twin? Oh, fine. Couldn't be better. I'm not interrupting anything, am I? Oh, no. Glad to see a friendly face. Sit down. Thank you. Mr. Gilded Sleeve, I have a business opportunity I'd like to discuss with you. Oh? It's something so good it can't wait. Well... I said to myself, Bronco, let's keep this in the family. So I'm letting you in on the ground floor. Good. You have a cigar. No, thanks. But if you go in with me, you'll be smoking cigars a block long. Oh, I like the ring of this, Bronco. What's your proposition? Well, I'm going to put bottled water into every home in Summerfield. What's the matter, Mr. Gilded Sleeve? Can I get you some water? No, no, thanks. I just could hardly believe what I heard. Bottled water, you say? Oh, yes, sir. I formed the Babbling Brook Water Company. I'm offering a few shares to my family and friends. Bronco, do you realize what you're doing? Yes, sir. I'm going to make some money, and I'd like to cut you in. But I'm the City Water Commissioner. You don't expect me to go into competition with myself. Oh, Mr. Gilded Sleeve, every city of any size has a bottled water company. Besides, what would people say if a relative of the Water Commissioner started selling water? Well, I'd say I wish I'd thought of that. Oh, no. Bronco, my boy, I've been in water for some time. Let me give you some good advice. Stay out of it. Oh? Furnishing water for the public is a thankless job. The mayor was just in here talking about it. And my department isn't making any money. Oh, but I'm going to run this on a business-like basis. Oop. Bronco, you're probably just tired of your real estate job. You think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. Well... Listen to an older head. Give it plenty of thought, Bronco, and then forget it. Well, I'll talk to a few more people, and if they agree with you, I'll give it up. Good boy. Yeah, I always say, look before you leap, especially where water is concerned. Well, thanks for your advice, Mr. Gilded Sleeve. You don't mention it, my boy. Goodbye. Goodbye. I'm glad I corked up the bottled water business. Well, it hasn't been a bad day. I got out my water report and got rid of some competition. Yes, sir. I think I'll stop in at TV's and replenish my cigar supply. Hello, TV. Well, Mr. Gilded Sleeve. What can I do for you this afternoon? I'm going over to Lila's tonight, and I'd like to take some cigars. Yeah, well, what kind does she smoke? You know they're for me, TV. I'll take a couple of El Lobos. Yeah, well, that ambitious son-in-law of yours was in today. Bronco? Oh, fine, boy. Yes, he is. He was in to see me this morning, came to me for advice. My, my. Bronco had what he thought was a clever scheme for making money. But fortunately he came to me first, and I stirred him off the idea. Well, he must have got another idea. Well, he sold me some shares in a new company he's forming. Well, what's he in now? Water. Water? The stuff you used to sell in pipes before he thought of selling it in bottles. What do you mean, used to sell? Well, I just figure we'll be getting the trade from now on. Who's we, TV? The astute stockholders who got in on the babbling book water company. Oh, my goodness. I plan to put it in here at the fountain. TV, you use a lot of water. That's what I say. Over. If you don't watch it, I may take my business to Beckman's. Well, I may start trading at Beckman's myself. What? When the water business gets rolling, I may sell the pharmacy and just clip coupon. TV, you don't know it, but you're the one who got clipped. No, I wouldn't say that. I'm surprised that a conservative businessman and a good friend like P.B. going into that bottled water deal. Oh, well, I'm going to forget it. I just... Hey, what's this on the floor? Leroy's piggy bank broken open. Is that you, aunt? Hello, Leroy. Did you drop your piggy bank on the floor? No, I threw it on the floor. What? I wanted to get some money in a hurry. I'm not going to pass up any big deals. I'm in the water business. You bought some of Banco's stock, too? Two shares of the ground floor. Whatever that means. Oh, my goodness. It's an investment in my future, aunt. By the time I'm out of high school, I'll have a lot of money. Yes, yes. I suppose you think you'll have enough to put you through college. Heck, no. I'll have so much you won't have to go to college. Leroy, what's Bronco been telling you? Nothing. He shouldn't have sold you any stock? We didn't want to. I talked him into it. How many shares have you got, aunt? Absolutely none. Wouldn't he let you buy any? Wouldn't he let me buy any? I was the first one offered a chance. Muffed it, huh? No. Bronco came to my office with his water stock first thing this morning, and I turned him down. Oh, I get it. Afraid of what the mayor would say. Of course not. Just use good business judgment, that's all. The fact that I'm in charge of the mayor's water department had nothing to do with it. Ha! Young man. Excuse me, uncle. I've got to go see the neighbors. Why are you going to go see them? That boy. I didn't think anybody in this family would be silly enough to go into competition with me. That's unit guilty. Yes, birdie. I'll take you home. I want to ask you advice about something. Oh? Mr. Bronco has some stock for sale at the Badling Brookwater Company. Well, I'm glad somebody came to me for advice before buying it. Oh, I already bought it. I just wanted to buy some more. Birdie, I'm surprised at you. I didn't think you'd buy a gold brick. What's wrong with buying a gold brick if you can buy it cheap enough? Well... Mr. Guelsy, don't tell me you don't have some of this stock. I do not. Birdie, I work for the city. Yes, but you don't want to work for them forever, do you? Birdie, don't get carried away. No, sir. But when Birdie hears the opportunity knocking at the door, she opens it. Yes, sir, Birdie says, come here an opportunity instead of a while. Yes, yes. I sure am surprised that you didn't open the door to opportunity, Mr. Guelsy. But Birdie, I'm the water commissioner. Yes, sir, but if you open the door to opportunity, you can be the water... bottle water commissioner. All right, Birdie. Yes, sir, you're just the water commissioner now, but you could be the bottle water commissioner. Birdie, please. Mr. Guelsy, do you know what you could be if you opened the door to opportunity? Yes, but... That's right. You could be the bottle water commissioner. All right, Leela. Don't worry. You can't get rid of me. What a girl. If I did try to slip out, I'll bet she'd tackle me at the gate. Right, George. This is a pretty nice place to come when the little family turns against me. Imagine them buying that stock. If I married Leela and moved over here, they'd be sorry. I wonder if I'd be too. Yeah, I can. Good. Well, Leela, sounds like you have a new dress. How do I look? You say the most complimentary thing. Well, your dress is very pretty. Care to sit down? Or can you? Do you think it's too snug? Oh, no. No use wasting material. Let's sit here on the love seat. Love it. Right, George, Leela. There's something about a woman in sat. Well, I'll admit I'm a little overdressed if we aren't going anywhere. Are we? If you don't mind, let's stay home this evening. I don't mind, but I did want you to see my dress. Pretty. And then, of course, a girl never knows when her bow might take her eye off. It's been a trying day. Leela, you haven't been approached by Bronco, have you? What about? He's organizing a bottled water company. I'll declare. I hadn't heard about that. Well, it's a good thing I came over to warn you. He's selling stock to his friends around town. Keep the padlock on your purse, Leela. Oh, I don't know the first thing about buying stocks. I've seen it as Leroy, but he's got some. Leroy? He's invested in two shares, and he thinks he'll be independently wealthy before he's out of high school. Good gracious. And Birdie's sold on it. She is. Funny how gullible some people are. Even Peavey bought in. But Mr. Peavey's such a conservative business mind. That's what I've always thought. But now he's thinking of selling the drugstore and retiring. Really? Goodness, yes. Excuse me while I phone Bronco before all that stock's down. Now I'm selling his stock. Dave Gildeslee will be back in just a minute. You'd be surprised at what wonderful things you can do for your menu with a little imagination and Velvita Craft's famous pasteurized processed cheese food. 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Get a two pound loaf of Velvita tomorrow. Just be sure you get genuine Velvita, the quality cheese food that's made only by craft. Well our water commissioner took a dim view of Bronco's new bottle water company, but now that his family and friends all own stock, the great gilded sleeve begins to feel a little left out. I ran into Judge Hooker, and it seems he's invested in Bronco's new business too, Bertie. Yes, sir. He probably had a roll of $2 bills buried in the backyard. Yes, sir. That judge is a smart man. You change your mind about the babbling Brooke company yet, Miss Guilty? Oh, no. Just because all my family and friends are climbing on the bandwagon doesn't mean I have to. No, sir. But the first thing we're going to play on that bandwagon is, we're in the money, we're in the money. Bertie. We got a lot of water to take to get along. All right, Bertie. Miss Guilty, you better get off this Bronco's bandwagon. Bertie, that doesn't worry me one bit. The thing that concerns me is whether or not I offended Bronco by refusing when he first offered me the stock. Yes, sir. After all, he married my niece and I really should encourage the boy. Yes, sir. The charitable thing for me to do is to go buy the rest of his stock just to help him along. Yes. Bronco? Oh, hello, Mr. Killer Sleep. I'm on the phone right now. I'll be wicking just a minute. Here you go. Right ahead, my boy. I'll wait. Yeah, hello, Mr. Mumford. Yeah, well, as I was saying, we appreciate what the banks offer to do, but frankly, we have all the money we need to get started. Oh. Yes, sir. Yeah, we're raising it from private sources. Maybe there's still a chance. Hang up, Bronco. Yeah, thank you, Mr. Mumford. Yeah, goodbye. Oh, yes, Mr. Killer Sleep. Well, Bronco. Do you want to hang up your hat? No, I'll hold it in my hand. Bronco, I've been thinking about your offer the other day and I hope you aren't offended because I turned it down temporarily. No, no. Now you have your right. Your opinion is a businessman. You've made the decision. I'm sure you're happy with it. Well, let's put it this way. I have an obligation to you as a relative. Well, Mr. Killer Sleep. Yes, I do. The same as you have an obligation to me. Well, that's why I didn't force the stock on you. You will try it again. What? You don't give up, Bronco. You'll never get anywhere that way. Well, I'm sorry, Mr. Killer Sleep, but I've raised the necessary capital. You have? But if things continue as they're going, we may want to expand. I'll call you. Thank you very much, Bronco. I'll appreciate anything you can do. Well, the bank certainly thinks highly of Bronco's company. I should have taken the stock when it was first offered. Why should I worry about what the mayor thinks? I guess my only chance is to find a friend who'll sell me part of his. I'll have to be cagey about this. Hello, BB. Hello, Mr. Killer Sleep. My tongue, your mind. Oh, nothing. Just thought I'd drop in. Yeah, you're in. P.D., we've been friends for a long time. Yeah, it did seem like a long time. You bet. We're jolly boys together. Yeah? I'm a customer of yours. I guess there's nothing I wouldn't do for you and nothing you wouldn't do for me. What are you getting at, Mr. Gilda Sleep? Nothing, nothing at all. I was just saying that friendship is friendship. Well, I'm glad to hear you say that. It makes it easier to discuss something with you that's been on my mind ever since I bought Bronco's stock. Hello? Hot dog. Go ahead, P.D. This is confidential, Mr. Gilda Sleep. Oh, my, yes. I'm wondering if you'd care to make a little investment. Yeah, he's playing right into my hand. Go ahead, P.D. Well, you know, I bought quite a chunk of that bottled water company. A lot of it, huh? How can I help you out? When it starts to pay off, how would you like to buy my drugstore? Oh! Fine dinner, Bertie. Thank you, Mr. Gilda Sleep. More coffee? Well... You'd better have some if you're going out again tonight. Well, I thought I might stay home. You say Bronco's coming over to see me? Yeah, he's delivering Bertie's and my stock. Oh, yes. The Bertie's sure looking forward to that. She's going to have a stock full of stock. Fine. Hey, you know what Bronco says? Every shareholder is a partner in the company. Oh, that's right, isn't it? We get to vote on everything the company does. You do? Say, has there been any talk of taking in any new partners? I'm dying to get in, Bertie. Well, that's the way it is with a good thing. Everybody wants in too late. Well, I admit I made a mistake. But still, if you two have voting stock, you may be able to help me. Yeah? At your first meeting, you might see if you can vote some shares for me. Okay. Bertie, let's hold a board of directors meeting. You and me? This director ought to be washing dishes. Ah, stick around. Members of the board, we will now consider admitting that Morton P. Gillers-Leave is a partner in the company. Oh, Leroy, I'm serious about this. I'm just getting to the voting. All in favor of letting them in say aye. Aye. Aye. Well, I'm glad there are two people who will vote for me. There's only one trouble, Aunt. What? I can't vote until I'm 21. Oh, well, all you have are two shares, anyway. But Bertie's over 21. Yes, sir, slightly. Bertie, you might use your influence. You can count on me, Mr. Gillers-Leave. Good. How'd you like to take the day off tomorrow and talk to Bronco for me? The whole day off? You bet. I know you've been saving your money, and a good word put in by a big shareholder might swing it. Yes, sir. By the way, how many shares have you? One. Oh, my goodness. I'm going in the parlor. Sorry I can't help you, Aunt. That's all right. It doesn't mean that much to me. Is the paper in the parlor, Bertie? Yes, it's right on the couch. I'm going to forget about that stock. I don't care if I don't have any. I... I think I'll stretch out. Pretty big dinner. No, I don't care. What if I am the only member of the family that doesn't have stock? Well, put it out of your mind, Gillers-Leave. Even Leela has stock. And the judge. And Pee-Pee. Bottle of water. Bottle of water. Water. Water. There's a lot of water out here. I wonder who owns the yacht. Running out here in the middle of the water. Are you hitchhiking? I don't know how I got out here. Oh, come aboard, Shirley. Thank you. You're very kind. Oh, Leela doesn't forget how old friends were on their offers. Well... Throckmorton, what ever happened to your job as water commissioner? Oh, I'm still hanging on. But the mayor had to cut my salary because everybody started using water in bottles. Who's yacht is this, Leela? It's one of mine. Oh? Say, there's Pee-Pee in a Commodore's yacht. Doesn't Mr. Pee-Pee look nice in his brass button? Yeah. Pick up some flotsam, did you, Mrs. Ransom? Oh, Pee-Pee, you know me. It's Throckmorton. Well, hello, Mr. Diodesley. Pee-Pee, what are you doing on this yacht? Mrs. Ransom uses her little yacht to take me out to my big yacht. I really missed the boat. Mrs. Ransom, don't go too close to that island. Judge Hooker owns it. Yeah, I thought I saw an old goat up on that mountain peak. Good gracious, here comes the Shaw Patrol. Somebody on there shaking his fist at you. Kill the slave! Uh-oh, this mayor's willing to. Kill the slave, what's the idea of half-nobbing with a bottle of water, people? Well, Mr. Mayor. Get back to your cubby-hole in the city hall. I'm not so sure I want to go. Oh, yes, you do. Mr. Mayor, stop. Stop pulling me by my arse. Come on, kill the slave. Wait a minute, stop. You pull me off the yacht. Wake up, Mr. Gilder Sleeve. Wake up. Wake up. Hey, where's Judge? Mr. Gilder Sleeve, come on, wake up. Oh, Bronco, what happened? Oh, I tried to awaken you and you fell off the couch. Yeah, you were yelling at the mayor. You must have been dreaming. Well, if the mayor was in it, it was a nightmare. Hey, Bronco brought me to stock. Look. Please, Leroy, get it out of my face. Don't flaunt it. Mr. Gilder Sleeve, when you came in the office this morning, I just couldn't resist having a little fun with you. What do you mean, Bronco? Well, if you really want to buy some of our stock, shares are still available. Well, teasing me, huh? Yeah, I should take you to task for this. Ah, don't boot up. Well, the old water department office looks a little shabby with this new stock laying on my desk. I guess I better get it in my strong box before somebody comes in. See, here's something I almost forgot I had. Some shares in that lost gold mine. I know who lost. Yeah, I wonder if I'll do any better this time with the bottle of water company. Yeah, this office doesn't look as bad as I thought. Gilder Sleeve? Uh-oh, can't let the mayor see this. Ouch, closed the lid on my hand. What are you doing? Me? Gilder Sleeve, is that stock? Is that stock? Well, yes, it is, isn't it? Don't tell me you've invested in that new bottle of water company. Yeah, but... It got back to me that you were trying to buy in. It did. And you trusted employee trying to get by with something. No, Mr. Mayor, what's wrong with my owning a little stock in the company? What's wrong with it? You didn't let me in on it! Well, if we have any left, I'll call you. The Great Gilder Sleeve will be with us again in just 30 seconds. Mom, did you know that a sandwich made with velvita, Kraft's famous pasteurized processed cheese food is one of the most nourishing sandwiches you can make? That's true. Two ounces of velvita, the amount you usually put in a sandwich, gives you more of milk's vital food values than you get an eight ounce glass of milk. Remember that when you're making sandwiches for your family. Make them with the cheese food that's not only delicious, but really nourishing too. The cheese food of finest quality, velvita. Well, I thought I'd listen to one man's family on the radio. Yeah? It's their 21st anniversary. Gosh, they've been around longer than I have. Yeah, it's a fine show. And let's not forget we have an anniversary coming up next week, my boy. We do? Yep. Marjorie and Bronco's wedding anniversary. Yeah, and George the Gears roll around pretty fast. Seems like only yesterday they were married. I bet it seems a lot longer than them. No, my boy, they're a very devoted couple. Oh, all that lovey-dovey telephone during the day. Kissing each other when Bronco leaves in the morning, kissing when he comes home at night. What a wife! Lira has a lot to learn, hasn't she? Good night, brother. The Great Gildersleeve is played by Willard Waterton. The show is written by John Elliott and Andy White, and is partially transcribed. We put it in the cast by Walter Tethlee, Lillian Randolph, Dick Prenner, Shirley Mitchell, Stanley Ferrar, and Dick Lagrange. Musical compositions by Jack Meakin. This is John Heaston saying goodnight for the Kraft Foods Company, makers of the famous line of Kraft quality food products. Be sure to listen in next week and every week for the further adventures of The Great Gildersleeve. What goes into your favorite sandwich? Maybe it's roast beef or savory baked ham. Whatever your favorite, the perfect meat sandwich needs the perfect mustard. Kraft prepared mustard. For when you add a little mustard, you add a lot of tang. You can take your choice of two kinds of Kraft mustard. Mild Kraft mustard is smooth and delicately spiced. Or if you like your mustard with extra pep, try Kraft mustard with snappy horseradish added. Keep them both on hand and keep everyone in the family happy. Next time, get Kraft prepared mustard. This is NBC, the national broadcasting company.