 What do you welcome to psychic medium Tony Green? I am Tony Green. And today I'm doing a extremely special episode called What type of relationship are you in? Now, before I start this show, before I bring on my co hosts, I want to say a few things. First, if you are extremely sensitive, this might not be the show for you. There may be trigger warnings in this show. So if you get offended easily, please take everything we are about to say with a grain of salt. The reason I'm doing this show is, first of all, just relationships today can be really complicated and difficult to navigate. I wanted to bring this show in a somewhat funny way with a somewhat funny. I wanted to be a little bit comical about it. So again, it's all about relationships. But if you get triggered easily, if you are very sensitive to these subjects, please, if you need to click, click away, click away. Okay. Second, don't take one thing I say and run with it. Your relationship is based on many, many different aspects. So if I say one thing, and you're like, Oh, my gosh, that happened six months ago. This is my whole relation. No, no, it's not your whole relationship. It's one thing that happened. Don't take one thing I say and turn it into your relationship. You know your relationship. This might be one thing that just happened at one point. It doesn't define your relationship. So the first co host today is Dylan. Hey, Dylan, what's up? Good. Thanks for having me. Absolutely. So Dylan, today we are doing a show about the different types of relationships and some of some of the aspects in those relationships. Are you ready? Are you ready for this? Let me start there. We will see, we will see if I'm ready. Yeah, I have some really tough awesome. I have some pretty tough questions for Dylan because Dylan is Dylan, you're single dating? Yes, single. Yes. Okay, so Dylan's single. And he has a lot of guy friends. He has a lot of guy acquaintances. So his answers might not be based on his personal experience. But if they're based on experience of what he has seen, he can bring accurate answers. Now, again, part of the reason I'm doing this show is I think sometimes men and women in relationships can easily be misled, can easily be misunderstand where a relationship is at, right? They can think it's one place, but it's really another place just because either there's not clear conversation or, or for whatever reason, it's happening, it's happening. So here we go. The first type of relationship, and I'm comparing these all to different types of movies, just so you know. So the first type of relationship is a rom-com, a romantic comedy, some something that both people are interested in taking it to the next level. They're both working on the relationship. There are a few little mishaps. The relationship goes up and down. There's, there's dinners, there's plans for the future, there's weekend getaways. That's what I would describe as a kind of like a romantic comedy type of relationship where there might be a few misunderstandings, but both people are sincerely and truly working on getting that relationship to the next level with each other. Okay. The next type of relationship is the reality show relationship. It's a lot of drama, maybe some baby mama drama, maybe some family drama, maybe just arguments between the two of you, constant jealousy, maybe some, you know, adult beverages or addictions are involved. There's, it's just a dramatic relationship. Like, it's a Jerry Springer type of relationship. Now, not many of my people are going to be having this relationship, but there might be aspects where like, oh my gosh, his sister just brings so much drama to our relationship or, you know, whatever it is. And the third type of relationship is, are you in a porn? Because, and now before you get offended, don't get offended, everybody, y'all just hold on, take a breath. This is like the friends with benefits relationship. This is the relationship where they come over possibly late at night, mid afternoon, early morning. There's some adult activities going on. So there's a lot of coming and going. Let's just put it that way. There's a lot of coming and going in this relationship, but there's no plans for the future. There's no real talk about, you know, hey, where's this going? And this might be the type of relationship where one person, and I think we're going to spend a lot of time on this relationship over the other two types of relationships today, because this is the type of relationship that can bring one person a lot of confusion, because they think it's going someplace. They have this, they're just hoping or thinking it's going to go someplace. It's going to be a really more of a relationship like, well, we're in this state, but eventually we'll get to this place or be doing this thing. And I think that is probably where we're going to have some serious questions today and some serious conversations, because a lot of people that come into my office, a lot of people that call on the show, a lot of people that have sessions over the phone, this is the type of relationship they're talking about the type of relationship where they are hoping it's one thing or they're thinking it's one thing and the other person is just not on that page for whatever reason. So I'm going to start with a question for Dylan. Dylan, there are there are different types. I have to turn my, okay, everybody, my text, my text notification is a dog barking. So clearly I need to turn that off now. So that that doesn't come through anymore. So, okay, Dylan, a man, when a man, when a man meets a woman, I feel like breaking out into verse on that. And he is serious about this woman. How long does it take a man to know he's like serious about the woman like this is it? Like, not necessarily this is it. I want to marry her just wow, I think I want to find out more about her. How long does that take? Well, yeah, like, you know, keep moving forward. Yeah, well, okay, so it's something he's serious about. So let's just say you go to dinner with a woman. Do you know during that first dinner, or that first date, or that first coffee, do you know how much like in man speak not only you but other guy friends of yours? Are you aware at that point in time that this is something like do you know throughout that conversation, like, hey, I really like this person. I'm going to take it further. Well, yeah, okay, three days are if you want to keep pursuing it. So I was in that first two weeks, you would know. Okay, perfect. So that level that you're and that's really good for women to know because sometimes women think men are wanting to possibly like they keep going out with them or keep meeting up with them. Because the woman thinks it's serious, but the man is just in that casual, let's have fun place, right? So it's good to know that within like maybe that first two weeks, a man is aware of the fact if he wants to take this a little further or not, right? That's really, I think that's very telling. Now, it doesn't mean that within the first two weeks, the man is going to be madly in love with you, or be planning the wedding. That's more of a girl thing than a man thing. So girls, you know, be practical about these answers. And if it doesn't, if he doesn't show something in the first two weeks, it doesn't mean that there's absolutely no interest there either. It just means, you know, that maybe he's on the fence or something like that. But Dylan, in a relationship, what are the steps when a man is serious about a woman? What are the steps that that man will take based on your friends and you with the steps the man will take with the woman to let her know he's a little bit more serious and it's not so casual? Probably introducing to some family or friends, you know, some people that are close to that person that individual is talking about going or talk about future things, more of what couple friends that you have, or intimate interests that you're sharing that kind of information, that would be a very positive sign that it's moving in a really good direction. Absolutely, I agree 100%. And I can't stress this enough. If someone is, I think if someone's truly interested in you, you're going to know by the content of their conversation, and the, the, the time you spend together where it is and what you're doing. Okay. Now, from a man's perspective. And I know this is really hard for women to hear and it's really hard for some men to hear too. And I, I'm trying in my head to come up with that really right way to phrase this, to not be too, to not let this question sound too harsh. But if a woman is allowing a man to come over for adult activities, he will, will he do that for as long as he can without like, a commitment, even if he's not interested in a commitment? That's, that's for you, Dylan. That's a tough one. I think that, that could be different for each guy, I would say. I think off your topic a little bit, if the guy is asking more about maybe a lot of questions or asking what you think of the future, that would be a definite sign that he's interested in pursuing it even further. Even if it is, will you just into that? You know, I think sometimes that's missed that it could develop from starting at that type of relationship. Now this guy, he feels more interested and he's asking more questions and wanting to know more about Okay, that's a good, that's a very good valid point. Thank you for adding that. So if somebody is like starting to ask more questions or starting to be more interested in your life, how, because I think like women assume, like we've not, I don't want to say assume, but we've been together this long, this has been going on. This is just the way it is. Eventually, we're going to get there. And I know you can't speak for all men, but at what point, at what point do women does in a partnership in a couple ship? At what point do you have to say, Okay, it's been like this for this long. And I don't really see progression in the relationship. At what point do you think if a woman is interested in progression, she can really call a guy out on that sort of behavior? Because women, I'm going to tell you from a woman's perspective, and not only from my perspective from, from a lot of women that I've talked to, we try to be understanding, we try to be nurturing, we try to feed the relationship, we think if we do certain things, it's going to lead to a certain place. And we think the guy is on the same page. And a lot of times they're not. So at what point, and I know it's different for every man, but at what point should a woman, or a man in this situation, who wants a serious, a more serious relationship, really say, look, we're here, when are we going to get here? Because you don't want to do that on the third date, you don't want to do that in the first month, even I don't think I don't think the first month is a good time to really try to pinpoint that some plans for the future. So we could go up for this vacation spot. Let's do the show you how serious it is. I love that something that's a month out point blank answer. Let's do this. Let's do this for you know, even a week vacation or going somewhere farther away, that might be where you might get your answer. If he hesitates, like coming up with reasons why he can't, you might have your answer right there. Because he should want to. If it's something hits, he's like, I'm all in. I'm in on this. I want to see this relationship move forward and see where it goes to. Excellent. That's an awesome answer, Dylan. So in that case, like, I think most people know the relationship they're in and the dynamics of it. And many times people let it go so long, they think that well, naturally, there's going to be a payoff or they're just too afraid to quit the relationship and go for something new. They don't the biggest thing I hear from men and women is I don't want to start over again. I just I don't want to start over again. I don't want to have to go out there and start dating again. I don't want to have to go through all those first stages again. I don't want to have to start meeting people again and have it not possibly not work out again. So my I'm going to give you my answer and then I'll let you give yours, Dylan, but you're talking risk, right now risk reward, right? Right? Like, okay, if you I think if you're not getting what you want in a relationship, and you've given it a certain amount of time, and that amount of time has to be comfortable for each person. But I think once you get past a certain amount of time, you have to look at the relationship and say, Okay, this is what it is. I get it's not going to be when you're talking years in. It's I don't think it's changing. Do you once we get to those years, Mark? Period time. So that is up for interpretation. Okay. If a guy is okay, if a guy is serious about a woman, and he's invested two years, is he making those moves to make it more serious? Is he making those moves to let her know? Or is he just going with the flow? He's got to make some tiny commitment as he goes along. He has to maybe it's just something is he lives far away, or he's out of town. He makes a commitment to two years or a year and a half. That's a commitment that he's wanting to move a positive direction. Okay, what if they're both local? And it's good. Because the thing is, I think a lot of times in a relationship, people either have the assumption it's going someplace, or they have the assumption, like this has been going on this long. Let's say it's been somewhat casual for this long. But if I just hold on, it's going to get serious. So in in my in my thought, in my thought, if it's gone on for a certain amount of time, and it hasn't changed, and you've had those conversations, it's probably not going to change. Now, I would agree with you. Yeah, if you've had the conversations, if you've asked the important questions, don't make a I don't think we can make a lot of assumptions in relationships, because we don't know the dynamics of the other person's mind at any given moment. But we do have the right to question where things are going. And if I want to say this, a lot of women will say, Well, I don't want to ask him because I don't want to upset him. In my opinion, if you're afraid, they don't want to know the answer. That's I think that's yeah, I think that's a really big part of it. I honestly do think that we don't want to ask sometimes because we're afraid of the answer, or we're hoping the answer is going to be this and it's not. But if you're sincerely afraid to upset someone by asking them a question, that's not someone you should even be in a relationship with as a friend, let alone a partner. If somebody gets upset, every relationship is going nowhere then. Exactly. You're afraid to ask someone a question? Yes. No. If you're afraid of the answer, that's one thing. But if you're afraid, you're going to upset them with a question, then you already know what the answer is, and they're getting irritated because either they don't want to tell you the truth, or they've already had this conversation. Either way, if somebody's going to get upset based on your question, and you have a certain amount of fear with that, you need to maybe think about letting that go. Just let it go. No, I want to Exactly. I want to go back to getting out of a relationship because I started saying a lot of women and men, they don't want to start over again. But I just have this belief system, if you're not getting what you want in the relationship that you're in, A, you're never going to get what you want in that relationship. And you have to decide, A, is it more important to keep a situation you're not happy in, or get what you want and be happy? Do you believe what you want is out there? And believe me, it's out there. If there's something you want in a relationship, if you want your relationship to look at a certain way, trust me, there is another person out there for you that also wants that. It might take a minute to find them. So I always say, don't be afraid to start over. If you're truly not happy, don't be afraid to start over, don't be afraid to let go and move to something else. If you're not happy and you're not getting what you want, because there are millions of people in this world, you are going to find one that fits your criteria. Would you agree with that, Tim? Dylan, God, where did that come from? I'm so sorry. I would say two things to that. I think another part to that would be in yourself that you should trust that there is somebody that might be the right fit. Yeah, you are taking a risk. You're taking a risk or maybe this is going okay, you're somewhat happy with it, but it's not going anywhere, maybe. And so then you are taking a risk that now, like anything, you might have to take two steps backwards or one step backwards to go two steps forward, right? That would be kind of that. And just the confidence in yourself that you will find something different. You will find something better, but it is a risk. I can see why anybody would be scared of that. Yes, absolutely. It's not easy to walk away from something, especially something you have invested time and love in your heart in. And letting somebody go is never easy. I don't care. Sometimes you could be with somebody for three months and felt such a deep and profound connection to them. And you still know that this might not be the right person for you. And it's difficult. And it sometimes it hurts a great deal to walk away from something that didn't work out or isn't working out. But the the the question you have to ask yourself and it depends on the type of relationship you're in. If somebody keeps, you know, if if you're only getting this aspect of the relationship and you're not getting the whole relationship that you want, are you willing to settle for that for the rest of your life? Because that hurts too to be in something where you're not fulfilled. It eventually you feel defeated. It takes pieces away from you. And whether you're male or female, that that's just a solid fact. And so sometimes you have to walk away just to regroup yourself and rebuild yourself. And then, you know, the right thing can come in. What what do you think Dylan? Well, I would say if you've got to be old, you know, there's been a lot of books written out there about if you're open to it, you got to be open to it. If it's going to come, just going to be closed minded and think it'll never happen and go back to that confidence idea that you've got to be confident that there is something else out there for you. Do you have your mind open minded to that? A lot better chance that that's going to happen. No guarantee. Obviously, that's why it's a risk. There's no guarantee, but you're more open minded to and a lot of times I think early on, if you express what you want out of a relationship, you know, you put out there what you want to have. This is what I'm looking for in the first day, not on the second day, but as it progresses in the first month or two, and you express that, well, confidence might be first and more and more. Absolutely. And we are coming up on the 30 minute mark. And I just want to say, I agree 100% with what you said, Dylan. And I'm going to add to that. I always find a way to ask a guy, are you looking for something serious? It doesn't have to be with me. Okay. But if they're not even in a place where they're looking for something serious, that you're not going to be the person that changes their mind. You're not. Because they're not even looking at a commitment. They're not they're nowhere near being in a commitment. It doesn't matter what you do, how you do it. But I think that's a fair question, even on a first date. Not asking, where do you see this going with me? But what are you looking at at this time in relationships? And I do feel like that might be a fair question to put out there right away. So you don't invest either one of you invest in something that neither one of you might be, I'm saying that so backwards. But I think everybody knows what I mean with that one. So have an absolutely amazing rest of the week and a beautiful weekend, everybody.