 When you tried to move on from the narcissist When you were in the relationship with a narcissist They never wanted you to succeed They never wanted you to achieve the desired aim or result They wanted you to fail So that they could be the center of attention They could not allow you to have the opportunity to outshine them That would only cause them to feel worthless and insignificant So while they were with you, they became envious and jealous They had to sabotage any potential progress that you were making They had to isolate you and hide you from the rest of the world Regardless of how the relationship ends When it is finally over Whether you discard them or they discard you They still want to have access to you They still want to have the ability to contact you or check in on what you are doing They still want the right or opportunity to approach or see you To be around you This then gives them the ability to hoover you to return or reconnect with you This is why they never give you closure This is why they never give you the opportunity to come to terms with the end of the relationship They never talk about it with you They cannot allow you to have the feeling that the emotional or traumatic experience has been resolved Because then that would give them no relevance to you It would leave them no longer closely connected to you, no longer appropriate No longer suitable or proper in the circumstances And the narcissist always wants to remain relevant in their target's life They do everything they can to avoid their inner feelings of worthlessness and insignificance If they were to give you closure That would mean that they have to close the door on everything that you and they once had That would mean that they could no longer return to you when they need attention They can no longer return to you to use as their emotional punching bag They can no longer return to you when they need something from you Giving you closure or trying to resolve the experience is not going to benefit them in any way It's just going to leave them feeling small and insignificant with no attention No opportunity to come back to you or be around you again It's the last thing the narcissist wants They always want to have that opportunity to come back to you if they need to And that is why they will not give you closure Once the narcissist begins to realize and accept that you have moved on from them They begin to feel rejected They begin to feel inadequate As though they are lacking the quality or quantity required As though they are insufficient for a purpose As though they were unable or not good enough to deal with the situation it causes a narcissistic injury And they become even more envious and jealous than you have ever seen before They feel that they have the right to do or have whatever they want Without having to work for it or deserve it Regardless of how you feel or what you want If they want you you should be theirs That's how they see it They are entitled and self-absorbed They believe that they are inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment Regardless of what you or anyone else thinks feels or desires They try to act impressive or imposing in style or appearance And they have an exaggerated sense of their own importance and abilities So they believe that if they want you You should want them And there should be no thought or consideration towards any other ideas or alternatives Even if they are the ones to discard you And then a few weeks or months later they then decide to hoover you They then decide to return or reconnect with you And you are no longer interested in them or no longer desiring to be with them They will still see it as rejection They will still see it as though you are dismissing or refusing their proposal or idea As though you are refusing to accept or believe them In their minds you are not supposed to not want them You are not supposed to move on from them No matter how many weeks, months or even years go by That is the purpose of them not giving you closure Not trying to resolve what you have experienced with them They never want you to move on They never want you to forget about them They want you to remain unhealed So that if it doesn't work out with their new source of supply They can always come back to you And you will be there waiting for them Feeling confused and wondering what happened Hoping to receive closure on what you had experienced It leaves the door open for them to come back in It makes you more likely to give in to their Hoover attempt When you have been discarded by the narcissist You often blame yourself You often look at yourself and wonder if you have done something wrong Or if there is something wrong with you The narcissist trains you from the devaluation phase onwards To make you believe that you are the problem So when they discard you and then they finally come back to you You might try to accommodate them You might try to fit in with their needs or wishes Or try to adapt to their behaviour And the narcissist will continue to blame you While they are abusing you When you go no contact with the narcissist When you stop engaging or interacting with them When you stop responding to their Hoover attempts They begin to feel rejected They begin to feel inadequate It causes a narcissistic injury They become even more envious and jealous Than you have ever seen before They will try to destroy you They will do whatever they can to stop you from moving on They might start harassing and stalking you They might enforce flying monkeys and start a smear campaign When they know that there is no way for them to come back And there is no way for them to get you to see them the same way again There is no way to get you to be susceptible to their manipulation again They will start smearing your name And trying to assassinate your character or reputation They will try to portray you as this bad or evil person When you try to move on This is when they show you who they really are They have very low self-worth, self-esteem and self-importance Which was dependent on and regulated by you And forced to supply So when you begin to move on They are forced to reflect on how they really feel about themselves They are so self-absorbed that they cannot consider you They cannot have any regard for you All they care about is themselves When you try to move on from the narcissist They feel rejected And they experience a narcissistic injury They will try to smear your name Or assassinate your character or reputation They will also be trying to find a new source of supply They are not happy They are not satisfied They are just trying to get by with whatever they can find to sustain them While trying to prop up their false self and maintain their image But nothing ever changes Because they never look within The problem is always someone else or something outside of them So they never resolve anything They never learn from their mistakes or grow They just keep doing the same thing again and again Expecting a different result Thank you for watching I hope this video will resonate with you Please like, comment, share and subscribe Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos If you are delighted today My PayPal link is in the video description Coaching inquiries you can email me at nagsfathercoaching at gmail.com Check out the immersion dice in the nagsfather store Where you can purchase your own nagsfather t-shirt, tag top or mug The link is in the video description Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon