 Back to a week of my life vlog. Wow. But Macy just got back from New York. It's because, I mean, I wear this all the time. We have a uniform from my house, my free people shirt that's bleached, or I spilled bleach on. Obsessed, obsessed. Guys, it's Tuesday, I did a vlog yesterday, and then I had the whole thing tonight. But this morning, I woke up and I went to a needle point class with my grandmother and let me show you what I'm working on. Oh, I have a good TikTok that I need to edit, remind me of that. It's gonna be like when I wanted chaos, or no, just kidding you about wanting chaos. It's Tuesday at 10 a.m. and I went to a needle point class with my girl, like, chaos. I'm like laughing, but like I'm gonna cry. Hensley's having a hard day. No, it's just, I want to see Nala, it's just like, whatever, anyways. We have this needle point. Look at how perfect I did that up there, as you guys can see. And I want this to be on a pillow, and I understand that like the reality, like this is a very easy needle point thing, right? Compared to like what the other woman were doing, it was like a bunch of other people, similar age to my grandmother. And I was talking, and like normally, I would just be like really talking to like, that is my ideal demographic. Like a woman over 60, like oh my God, I love that I love hearing about their lives, I love everything about it. There's like not having a good day. So we didn't talk to them that much, but there's this one woman next to my grandma, who was so fabulous, and like that is who I'm gonna be obsessed with. And we're gonna regularly do these classes. Anyways, all I have to say, their needle point stuff was very advanced. And I'm like, I don't even know to finish this by Christmas, because I'm gonna have to go back in, and like get all the other stuff with colors. But I'm gonna try to do as much of the like, actually did natural white, not white. See, this is what my YouTube channel is about, I'm like, this is what people don't watch my YouTube, because like I'm sitting here for two minutes, like my needle point. You know what I mean? I went to at home after needle point, and I got the cutest trigger-winning Christmas, Christmas tabletop, but I'm gonna go get more. But like look at how cute it is. I need so many more just to have forever. It does give me a friend of mine vibes. It's just perfect. Good morning, y'all. It is Wednesday. I just made my coffee. I'm about to take Coco to her appointment. It's now October, and the weather's dropping a little bit. And I just am like, I don't know. I just have been in a like weird funk. I feel like I've just been kind of in like a weird mood the past like month or two, just like wanting something new in my life, like maybe being born. I don't know how to describe it. Like, you know what it's like in a weird phase, and you kind of feel like numb to everything almost, like it sounds really depressing. I thought it was my PMDD, which has really been acting up. I'm like going back on meds and figuring it all out, but I don't know. I've just been in like a weird place lately, and I'm starting to stress out because I'm like, this is my favorite time of the year, and I just thought it was gonna go away, and I'd be happy. And I feel like I'm getting in like a better spot. I would go to a doctor, should I say like two hours? Not really helped, but yeah, I don't know. If you guys are in a weird mood, I see you. I get it. I just like, there's something, it's not good, it's not fun. Okay, I'm gonna talk more about this on the podcast. And just like, I don't know, we'll go into it there. But I make coffee. I'm about to take over an appointment. I actually have therapy tonight, which I took a break from. I have a happy hour thing tonight for the family place, which is the organization that I work with that helps the victims of family violence or domestic violence. And it's for like, watching all these people to like, see how they can get involved and whatnot. So hopefully lots of people come to that. I keep ordering from friend of mine. Well, I've done it. This is my second time. I'm being dramatic. But because I want to see what the customer experience is like, so we're gonna do a little friend of mine unboxing. Here we go. I don't know why I would just wonder if I could not coax you on afghans. Oh, I did that separately. Look at how cute. Here's the recipe journal. I just keep giving these to people. I wish I was gonna have enough to give because I'm hosting a dinner party tomorrow night, which is gonna be so much fun. I decided we're gonna do like quarter four vision boards. So that's gonna be good. I wish I had enough to give to everyone that's coming tomorrow, but I don't. Unless someone already have them, I'll figure that out. But this is my recipe journal and the friend of mine cards. And then this, which I love these cards. So fun. And I'm shooting the product that we have. I don't know when I'm gonna say what it is. I'm shooting that product Monday and I'm very excited about it. And I'm already working on the second one of it. I'm gonna have all of it done besides finalizing the design. And then it'll go into sampling. But I'm very excited. If you guys don't know, a friend of mine is my brand. It is, I don't know how to describe it. It's just, it's like Nancy Meyers means Martha Stewart means like Gen Z, Kenzie Elizabeth kind of vibe. Like what's a lot of it is like hosting. We'll expand into other categories. This recipe journal I'm just saying for the holidays is the best gift for anyone, especially if you want it to be like a family like heirloom type thing where you like pass it down. But it's just such a good gift. I would get them now because I don't even think. I don't know if we're gonna even have any for sale by the time like December rolls around. Just depending on our inventory. We are like way more than halfway through inventory. And I ordered a lot more than I thought I would need. So I would get them now if I were you. Anyways, I have my coffee. I haven't even been drinking my Califia farm because now you know my anxiety isn't bad. Haven't even been having my Califia farms. Califia farms because I've been so anxious. I haven't been drinking coffee. Yeah, mm-hmm. Well guys, as if this week couldn't get worse. Let's see what Fitz got up to. A little emergency room trip. This is his hotspot he already had last week that we've already taken care of. This is charcoal because someone decided to get into chocolate chip cookies. Isn't that right? Isn't that right? So now he has to go to the happy hour with me and I'm late. And we sent the whole afternoon at the ER. Poor dude. He's totally fine though. So, you know, he's, he has, we've had better times. Oh, okay. Maybe, maybe not on my white hoodie. Thank you. Thank you. Happy Thursday. So today is dinner party day. Yesterday ended up being a shit show. Fitz is currently covered in charcoal and I've tried to get it out. Thank God he's getting groomed today. So it's worked out. He's fine. I never leave things out on my counter but also he never gets into anything. Like he's such a good dog. So I wouldn't even have thought if I left something out on the counter he would have gotten into it. And Jess had made us cookies and it was like chocolate chip chocolate cookies or something. I don't even know how much he had. We took him to the ER as you guys know and it was fine. He was totally okay. But it was just something. The first half of this week, not my week. Second half of this week, really gonna be my week because we have the dinner party today and that's gonna take all day to prep for. I've got a lot of stuff going. And then tomorrow I'm going riding with my manager and then we're supposed to go to the State Fair tourney. Saturday I have PBR, which I am so excited about. It's professional bull riding. If you guys didn't know, I'm going with Kate Davis who I love Kate Davis. I'm so excited to finally meet her. Her husband Cooper Davis is a bull rider. And she has this brand at First Class Cowboys that is so cute. So we're going with them. They're doing the pop up and then we have like a whole thing and I'm really excited. Oh my God, I ordered outfits and they haven't come in. I don't know, I'll have to figure that one out. It is just coming together. This is actually kind of like my ideal dream week. Everything's going together. The weather's dropping. It's only 60 degrees right now and it rained like crazy last night. So the dogs were like in my arms freaking out all night. But anyways, I'm off to get my Thursday blowout and then I have a lot of errands to run this morning. I need to go to the car wash. I need to go to Trader Joe's which is where I shop for gender parties that's cheaper and I can get, well, like I like the flowers there better. I need to go to CDS for other stuff cause we're going to make quarter four vision boards. And then I need to also go to at home cause I need to get more bowls for pasta. And then hopefully I can get more of those like Christmas tabletop things. Last night I literally laid in bed and I watched a podcast and I need appointed. So yeah, like I feel like this is a PSI. You know, I said I went a lot of chaos in my life in my 26 year, it's already October and like I've had enough as is. Like I can't do it anymore. Like something happened. I met chaos in my life, not chaos in like my personal life. Like in that I need stability. Okay, so I feel like I wasn't clear enough. I wanted chaos and like my fun social life, not serious not chaos and things that actually matter to me. You know what I mean? So we're done with chaos. Chaotic year canceled no longer. Actually, I don't know. I kind of do want to come back to it. I'm thinking now that this has happened I'm like maybe I'll just be like more chaotic than ever. I don't know. We'll see. Just got my car wash and my hair done. Now we're off to Trader Joe's and to run a couple errands. I'm trying to get this done as fast as possible. Here's my hair. It's already falling. It's so humid. If I wasn't already buying so much stuff I would be getting pumpkins today. Oh, wow. This is so exciting. These are so creepy like, ew. But I feel like I need pumpkins. I just don't have time or I don't have room today. I'm gonna have too much stuff. So many. Got so much stuff. Oh my God. So much food. Oh my God. And I had to make another door desk order from Sprouts for short rib and a couple other things. Wow. Back at my favorite store. These just to see. All right. We're out. Last errand finally. Getting stuff to make our vision boards. All right guys. I've been in the kitchen all day. I have Cooper here which is just a strawberry now. This is our little tablescape. I need to take this candle away for inside. I need to get the utensils out. And then we also have one for outside. The thing is, it's either nine people coming or 11. So I don't have my exact correct amount yet but I made these floral arrangements as you all saw. They're super cozy. Look at how cute. It looks so cute. So simple, amazing. I put a pasta in my mouth and it burned me. Did you guys see that? I didn't know it was going like that. You made me wear that. Happy Friday. So the dinner party last night was great. We just hung out. We sat outside in my pool right now. Looks so gross. It's literally like green out of nowhere. It was perfectly clean. And then we had a really bad storm and I need to get under it and do the filter thing. Anyways, I'm going to the ranch today to go riding. My manager and I are going. Like I said, this week isn't really weird. I also have such low energy levels. Like I've canceled two workouts and I couldn't even tell you the last time I canceled, like one workout a year. Like I never ever cancel. So I just wanted to lay in bed in order to play and wash the Kardashian. So that is what I did. I loved the episode. I feel like I just been in a weird funk. I don't know. I can't remember what I said to the vlog and what I said to my friends. I want to have some of the podcast and everything, but I just feel like I've been in a weird funk and then I just had a really bad week. Like so many, everything that could go wrong, basically so many different things have gone wrong. Even to the point where like my neighbors last night, they're gonna parked on the street. We have people over, everyone parks on the street. It's like not that big of a deal. And I wasn't out there when this happened, but like one of them came out and started yelling at Jess and was like, you guys are blocking. Which like my neighborhood, the streets are weird. I'm like, by the way, things are blocked on streets all the time and I just drive to the next one and go around and it happens literally all the time. And I, when I went out there, I don't know if I just like didn't see what they were talking about, but like no one was even blocked. I don't know. They were like screaming. And then just like they were just so rude. And then they were like, your neighbor who hasn't even introduced herself to anyone on the street. And I'm like, first off, like I have introduced myself to people on the street. Like I also like, I'm like 26. Everyone who lives in my neighbor, I don't know why I'm like telling you guys my neighbor going. Like everyone who lives in my neighborhood, they're like, their kids are like in college. Like there's no young kids. There's a very big age gap, right? Like I just like already feel awkward. And then when, I don't know, I just had like weird experiences. Okay, so anyways, I've always, if I see a neighbor, I'm always like, hi, I can introduce myself, whatever. I've met like three of them. But a lot of them just like aren't out. And then one of my neighbors told me that like two of the people are like one of the houses someone, they don't live there during the summer. I don't know. I don't know. And whatever, maybe I should have been trying harder, but also like I, they weren't outside. I'm like, I just feel like are we still in an age where you go over and bring cookies and also mind you, they haven't introduced themselves to me either. So I'm like, what? Anyways, he was so rude and yelling. And I'm like, see, normally I'd be able to handle that and just be like, hey, like what's going on? Like I'm pretty good at like those kinds of situations because I grew up in a very like reactive household. Anyways, I literally was like, I'm gonna lose my mind. Like I, I'm gonna lose my mind. I do feel like I'm like getting, coming back to, but like I was just saying I've been feeling very almost like, I don't know if not myself is the right way. I just feel like I've been in a weird kind of funk the past like couple of months, but I had other things going on. So it was distracting me. And now I'm like, wait, no, I actually do kind of feel that way. So anyways, with that being said, I watched Kardashian this morning when Kardashian goes to Harvard and something about that really inspired me and made me feel better. I feel like every other vlog I come on, I'm like, I make sure this is a role a lot. I just feel like it's annoying of me. But the other thing is that like, I just feel like it's so normal in your 20s. Like how these weeks where I've just been feeling like very lost and confused and like things are just like not going my way and like people are being mean and just like whatever. And that happens and it's normal. And I get it. I really, really, really do get it. Maybe I'll record a podcast episode. Like at this point I really might. So anyways, I'm getting dressed right now. I'm gonna wear Abercrombie jeans this top, it's 70. So I can wear this is from Abercrombie also. It's my favorite top and I also have it in the bodysuit, which I like the bodysuit better. I will link these. They are literally my favorite things ever. I also, we were here to the fair tonight but it's like the Red River weekend. And I feel like that's just the worst time to go to the fair ever. It's gonna be too crazy and I'm going to PBR tomorrow. So I feel like I'm just gonna have some family over and we're gonna like cook or something. I don't know, we'll see. And just chill and relax. So I'm gonna change and show you guys my outfit. Okay, I'm gonna do my makeup but I mean barely any makeup. This is my look. My hat is from friend of mine. These are dropping very soon actually. We're shooting some stuff on Monday, which I also really need to finalize today. Honestly, I just need to like stay in and work tonight, I think that's just gonna happen. But anyways, this is the look. My Annie is my favorite cowboy boots ever. Could do an entire YouTube video on cowboy boots. I feel like that's not really like a YouTube vibe. Maybe TikTok, I don't know. But I love it. I also have my find me in Texas hat that I love. This hat kind of looks better. No, it's like too casual. Camo, this is merch of mine, find me in Texas. It's really sick. It's on the deer media shop merch page, it's linked below. So anyways, I'm gonna go get ready. Hi, can I just get a sausage, cheddar, and egg sandwich? Sausage, cheddar, egg sandwich. Of course, anything else for you today? Yeah, and then a grande pumpkin cream cold brew, please. And then a grande pumpkin cream cold brew, of course. Anything else for you today? That's it. 10, 28, thank you. Thank you. Good morning, y'all. It's Saturday. We're not gonna vlog the PBR for the vlog, but we are gonna film and get ready with me and then we're gonna vlog the rest on TikTok. Macy's coming over in like an hour and we're gonna get ready. I'm very excited. The PBR is professional bull riding, if you didn't know. So yesterday I went to the ranch, we went riding and I had guys like just the irony of everything this week. I had a horrible allergic reaction. It went down by like five p.m., probably, but like this has been happening to me lately on the ranch that I just get like my face puffs up and like I had like a line here that was just like puffed, so painful. And then I worked and then Macy and I watched the Beckham documentary, watched the first like episode and a half. We really liked it. And now we're going to the PBR and we've decided that today is gonna be such a good day. That's Macy. She's just crazy. Okay, I'm getting my coffee. I don't know when I became like a Star Wars girl again. I just cause I've had the weirdest week of my life. Hi, get her you. I have points I think too. Perfect, thank you. Thank you, can I get a straw as well? Thank you, have a good day. Okay, it's time to get ready. Macy was supposed to come and get ready with me but she just called me and she just got out of the shower. And so anyways, we need to be on time and I'm getting ready right now. I'm wearing a very simple outfit you all see. Honestly, I don't even know just saying this, get ready with me because I'm like, it was gonna talk to Macy. But I guess we'll talk about a couple things that I wanted to do for friend of mine because I've just been thinking about like the staples of my life and things that I like really need. I've decided what we're talking about today. Disappointment in your 20s and friend of mine. So things that I wanna do, I've mentioned this before but I really, really want to do like a dinner party tour which is gonna take a lot of planning and a lot of work around Texas or just like random cities to where I can host dinner parties for you all and you guys like buy a ticket and then it kind of serves like as a pop-up but obviously it's a little bit different, you know? So I'm excited about that stuff. I really wanna do robes. I wanna do more kitchen stuff. The thing that I'm shooting next week and I'm sure I'll share with you all soon is I'm like so confident in this and I just feel like it's like the best thing that I could do like product-wise and I'm really excited for it. It's something that I actually want you guys to comment below. It's something that I bring with me to dinners all the time and it's like something that I play with friends. And my friends, I have other products of it from like other brands and my friends are always like, please bring that to dinner because we just love playing these like games if you will. We love them. So I feel like after that you guys will understand. But anyways, I feel like I'm kind of coming out of this weird funk like yesterday when I went to the ranch as my manager and I was talking and I was like, I just feel like, like your 20s are obviously like so turbulent and up and down and like there's not a lot of stability in it which I feel like I used to hate and then I started to love and I was like, it's fun. But I feel like when I start to hate it is when I like and really like let down in a certain area of my life, like not even like let down but like something hurts me and I'm like, God, like I just want the stability as if like I'll never be hurting in life. But like someone just like, I don't know if you think something good is happening or you think like a drug wants to cover you think like whatever it is, fill in the blank, you know? And sometimes I just like get really down which is so dumb and like I hate that I do that because it's like there's so many other amazing things around my life. And I'm like the luckiest girl ever. So I feel annoying. But then at the same time it's like you actually need to be able to like feel a certain way. Like I've been telling my friends I'm like give me like three days and I won't care anymore. And they're like, it's okay though. Like if like it's not three days and you still care like you're allowed to do that. But I'm just so like, I'm like an efficient person. You know what I'm saying? So like I want to like not be bothered by things. And it's like why it's hard for me to let like people in my life, not like friends. I feel like I have like the best friends in the world but like it's hard for me to look like people in my life because I don't like when people can like affect my emotions. That makes any sense, which isn't great. And obviously I have to like work on that. But yeah, I don't know. I've just been thinking a lot about like disappointment and how like every single time in the past I've been disappointed or let down or like hurt by someone or whatever. I always say this, like there's not a relationship in my life in any capacity that I no longer have that I wish I did. You know, like I always end up being like thank God. Like that was not. It doesn't even mean like that person or that situation or that work thing or like whatever opportunity it was. It doesn't even mean that like it was necessarily bad. It's just like you look back a kind of 2020 and you always end up looking back and you're like, well, like thank God, you know what I mean? Like I'm actually so glad that didn't happen because now I see why it didn't happen because this needed to happen like whatever. And you know what I mean? So I'm just like thinking that way but also I'm like it is okay because I'm so like, I don't know because I love like, I think like self-development and like therapy and all these things and just like trying to be like a really like as healthy as I can possibly be. I feel like sometimes I like discredit my own emotions or I discredit like it's okay sometimes to feel even though it looks like you have everything that you want, like it's okay to just be down sometimes. It is okay, you know what I mean? And I think sometimes I'll be feeling that way. And also I have PVD and that's been like pretty bad lately but I'll be feeling that way and I don't like allow myself to feel that way. If that makes any sense. Also I got this, what is this? Who is it? Like I'm like prison ball? I don't even know what it's called. I don't know, whatever on accident. I think I like had it in my car and then I like forgot to take it out of my car and everyone's like, oh, everyone's like, okay so I'm not supposed to apply that way. Everyone was saying it's like the best powder ever and I really do like it but I'm just noticing that I have no idea what I'm doing. I might not think eyelash is today. I might as well because like if I'm going to Kate's thing, you know, it's like her eyelashes anyways. I only wear rain lashes but I feel like lashes for 12 hours is a lot but it also makes you look like you've got your makeup done. So maybe I'll do that. It was the only one that I can do. The only issue is that I have to cut them and I hate cutting lashes. So we'll see. But I was leaving yesterday and I was just like, I don't know. I just feel like I'm in like this weird rut and like blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, whatever. And obviously like it's pretty dramatic for no reason, you know, whatever. And then I left and I got like the coolest email ever and I was like, see like good things are like always right around the corner. You know what I mean? But I don't, I don't know. I just feel like I always am like thinking and like hopefully like when I'm like 30, 31 and I feel like I have more stability in my life, I'll be like, oh my God, like that was like so dumb. You know what I mean? Like it's like anytime you're upset over like an ex-boyfriend or something, like later you're like, oh my God, that's embarrassing. Like that kind of eye. But I try to channel that in every area of my life where I'm like disappointed. I'm like, no, like trust me, I'm gonna be happy about it one day and that day is probably gonna be sooner than not. And I also feel like I've already at that point but I don't know. It just sounds like when you're like excited about something or when you like take a chance on something or whatever. And then it's not that. I'm gonna finish doing my makeup because I feel like I just keep rambling on. But I'm excited for next week's vlog because I'm going to Memphis and I'm going through the single country cares, which if you guys follow me on Instagram at this point, I'm sure you've seen. It was like a really big honor. It's with St. Jude. So I'm really excited about that. I don't know anyone who's going on the trip at all. So it'll be like a good experience. I feel like a lot of the time when I do things like this that are like really outside my comfort zone ends up being like a really like monumental week almost to where I feel like I just get like new like clarity or like direction or something. And then maybe I can use, I can just like do better things in the world. My sister's calling me. I gotta go, bye. I finished getting ready. I wanted to do my fake lashes but couldn't find my lash glue. So this is the makeup look. Also can someone explain to me why my left eye always looks worse. Like the mascara just like doesn't work as well. And it drives me crazy. I'm sure it's like no one else notices. But I notice, okay? So I obviously use my setting spray. I feel like I'm just constantly spraying this thing. Also, I've been wearing this Saint Laurent perfume and I've got a lot of compliments on it. What even is it? I don't know. Libre? I'm not sure, but it smells really good. And I get a ton of compliments. You know what else is amazing? This is my second one. I'm already down on anymore. The Capari Golden Aura Body Oil. This is amazing. There's nothing I've ever put on my body that hasn't made it, that has actually even compared to this. It's so glowy and it's so moisturizing by not being too oily and it doesn't make you look greasy. Like it is just, I don't know what they did here but it's amazing if you need any body oil or anything. Like this is my holy grail product for the rest of my life. I'm not kidding. So I'll link that below too. It's unreal. Okay, so this is my outfit. It's cute. I feel like the belt. I like the belt with it but it kind of like messes up with the vest. It's my boots of Lucacy. I need to put like my body oil on and then I'm pretty much good to go. I'm like out the door. I need to add my earrings that are in one of my purses. Why does it look like I'm crying? I feel like it always looks like that when I'm in this room. But anyways, I just like can't decide because I feel like the belt, it just like doesn't work but then what if like throughout the day this gets loose? You know what I mean? I don't know. Maybe I can fit it in my purse if I really want to. Hopefully that'll work. Okay, we are off. I hope you guys enjoyed this vlog. There's a lot more content on TikTok and next week the vlog will be better and I'll be in a better mood. I love you all and I will talk to you soon. Bye. I feel like people who came in during that time had a very different idea of who I was and it wasn't necessarily that I was being fake on mine at all actually. I just like, I was actually sharing like what was going on in my life at that point. It was just like a different period of time but I couldn't share a lot of them. Anyways, with that being said, I just wanted to share with you guys the story of how I got the nickname Delilah in Bible College.