The Universe Made Car Sales People





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Published on Feb 11, 2013

There is a reason we have people who sell cars. This video is for everyone in the business.

Feel free to distribute away! BUT... please.. do not re-label it or edit or anything of the sort. This means the "by" line should either read "Shocktane" or "Chris Adams." If you have any questions please contact shocktane@gmail.com or on facebook : SHOCKTANE video (c)2013 Chris Adams


About a century ago, we needed a way to get from point A to point B. So Daimler and Benz, Maybach and Peugoet, Ford, Olds, and a bunch of engineers and dreamers and ironworkers came up with cars.

And the universe said, these machines aren't easy to understand for ordinary folks, and they cost a lot of money. We better get some salespeople quick. And the Universe gave us car salesman.
The Universe said "I need someone willing to work bell to bell, six days a week, make a hundred phone calls a day, handle floor traffic, close four deals on the last day of the month, stay out till last call celebrating and still make it into the 830AM sales meeting the next day wide awake, ready to kick ass and take names." So the Universe gave us car salesmen.

The Universe said "I need someone who can charm the pants off a nun, talk business with executives, football with steelworkers, and knows just enough about just about everything to have an intelligent conversation with anyone, no matter what their hobbies or line of business. A fellow who is dropforged from steel, with brass balls the size of grapefruits, the confidence of a trapeze artist, the bravado of a pool hustler, the memory of an elephant, the skin of a rhinoceros, the horns of a bull and the polish of a statesman. ." So the Universe gave us car salesmen.

The Universe said "I need someone to shovel snow in sub-zero cold, to move a minivans worth of stuff into a new car in boiling heat. I need someone with the patience to teach your grandmother how to use a factory navigation system and the drive and determination to do a ninety minute demonstration for every customer, even if they came in ten minutes after close and can't finance a hot dog. " So the Universe gave us car salesmen.

The Universe said "I need someone who can get things fixed at Service without running up a bill. I need someone who can entertain kids and shut down third basemen and stand up to sales managers and close three deals by noon. I need someone who can survive for fourteen hours on nothing but coffee, adrenaline, and half a slice of pizza inhaled in a three minute lunch break, dealing with folks that shop prices against every dealer in the tri-state area and still have to think about it." So the Universe gave us car salesmen.

"I need someone who isn't going to break down when he has three deals unwind in one day. Someone who is willing to stay five hours over so his teammate can watch their kids' recital and get the short end of a split deal and not bitch about it. I need someone who knows the product line inside, outside, and upside down and can still sell what's on the lot today." So the Universe gave us car salesmen.

"But most of all, I need someone who will study. Learn the craft. Treat the people right. Train the new guy when you're not playing pranks on him. Take him under your wing. Pass down everything you've learned. So that one day, after you've sold everyone, and their families, and their coworkers, you're living out your days puttering around dealerships doing dealer trades, you can look out at all the young faces in the showroom, and know that somehow, some way, you made an impact on the world."

And so, the Universe gave us car salesmen.,. (c) Chris Adams 2012


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