 Told him not to put his dick in it because it's already rotten and there's no point in fucking something It's been lying there for four hours. Yeah, I live only Welcome everybody to episode number 27. This is episode number 27. So we've done 26 episodes That's half a year. This is one after 26. So yeah, we've just done over six months now. So Um, and we've decided that we'll um, this will be our last ever episode 27 they say that's the age to die So, um, it's a little bit of a special episode. This one. It is our very last ever podcast This is for you James Dean. We have a special guest on today. His name actually it's not just a special He's very special guest He's he probably means um a lot to uh, a lot more to us than than a lot of other people Because it just happens that Michael is uh, seeing is dating this person. Yeah, well, I've got it's an open relationship with my girlfriend And she's allowed me Because he's fucking he's yeah, he's he's amazing. He's he's cute as a button. Yeah. Yeah, don't say who it is yet But it is Michael's boyfriend will be on later in the show We were lying about um, it being our last episode too. So Don't go crying. Sorry about that And um today's date is the 9th of september, which of course is two days before September 11th, which of course is famous for back in the day When there was a famous horse race in yugoslavia and The horse the smallest horse its legs were two meters tall. Everyone thought it was retarded. No one thought it had a chance Ended up winning. So the horse is called bark Bark bark ended up winning on september 11 2002 And that's why september 11 is so renowned. That's why everyone knows you might think september 9 11, what why is that ring such a bell 9 11 9 11 9 11 9 11? Why is that so familiar 9 11? That's why bark the horse Won a horse race against all odds So what he's back legs two meters tall two meters tall and what did they come down like did they snap? No, no, it was just two meters tall his back legs It looked like he couldn't even really walk, but it just turns out that it's actually Quite an advantage having your hind legs be two meters tall. He just basically ran like a human Had was he from yugoslavia or did he go on a plane? No one knows but people think that he's some sort of hybrid between a horse and a silverback gorilla Wow, fuck me. Well, there you go Um on this day in 1908 orville right makes the first one hour airplane flight in the u.s And 1908 they had planes. That's the right one of the right brothers. Oh, he was so right. Yeah What was it like a wooden plane? Was it yeah, it was a wooden plane and they didn't actually have wings They had just two huge feathers. It was a very small plane It was about 30 centimeters long And all right wasn't actually on it. He was just running alongside it With it holding it And he went what around the world, what was it? No, it was just one hour flight Oh, so yeah, he's fucking running for an hour running around his backyard in circles for an hour That's easy and then three weeks later Orville right was actually shot in the head because people thought he was Insane So he was shot to death Do they have guns back in 1908 as well? Orville right actually invented the gun. Holy shit Bad move. You shouldn't invent a gun and then do stupid shit like that. Yeah, you're gonna get shot Especially in america three times out of ten. You're gonna get shot All right famous birthdays. All right. Keanu Reeves the actor from the matrix turns 54 today Dude, he looks like 30. Yeah, he looks really good And his secret is listening to this podcast So Keanu fucking did catch up with him in LA. Oh man. Remember that fucking thing on the uh, I told you on the bus Don't fucking tell anyone that keezy. Haha. You're fucking dog. Can't Fucking dog. Can't don't fucking mention shit to anyone And we also have Salma Hayek the actor who turns 52 today. Who the fuck is that? She's that chick with four tits Dude, she's cool. Yeah, I don't mind that And of course our friend jamie zoo turns 25 today. Fuck. We're so old I'm only four years old. I that's nothing. Yeah, you've four and a half. Keanu Reeves is 54 Yeah, but he's like really successful and He's done heaps of shit already. We haven't done shit. We've got fucking 26 episodes of a podcast 27 Not yet. What happened this weekend? Oh, I don't think I should say it Michael pissed his girlfriend's Betty pissed all over his girlfriend That's why Michael's leaning towards locky now because she's a bit off him. So locky gets oh, fuck. I've mentioned his name I guess today's locky. So Michael's been pumping locky a little bit since uh, he's girlfriend Yeah, well you fucking mean watching me and Jackson put him on the spear Yeah, well there's a difference between watching and participating. Yeah, well if you're there, you're sort of participating I am saying no, no, please stop. I feel uncomfortable the whole time. Yeah, but you still stay you could have let and once I did take my shirt off Yeah, yeah, you'd had like a bottle of wine that night and you had we just drove past a cow field And yeah, you were a bit friskified But yeah, yeah, she's not happy. Obviously. It's the first time I've pissed her bed and it's like Fuck So awkward i'm 29 and oh, it's not on She sends me to the carpet Because she's pissed off. I've just pissed her bed and then I piss the carpet as well. Oh my god What the fuck man? Just go to the toilet. I was Fucked I don't even remember. Yeah. Yeah a lot obviously I can't believe you still haven't thought of something to counter your pissing Yeah, just make make your own that be like a blanket and staple it together around the sides Well, we were talking about that night when we're going to the party She she got brought up and I was and then I was like, oh, I was just fucking wearing adult nappy And it's like we manifested it So we were talking about it early on and then that night was the night I fucking did it I wonder if you put on a pair of underwear and then just glad wrapped Everything like a whole be like a pool of piss whole layer of glad wrap around inside there. Yeah If you would still it would spray out Yeah, yours seems to be getting worse. Yeah, I'll have a beer with dinner and shit on the floor Well, I guess that has happened before but that's because I was trying to show you what shit looks like on the floor No, and it just slipped seeped out a bit Yeah Anyway, I've I'm a grown up in 29 We've put up a story on instagram asking for some questions and apparently there's a shit load Wanting to know think people want to know stuff about locky So we're going to combine the fan questions and the Special guest. All right. Um, so let's without further ado. Let us introduce our guest for the for the episode He has amassed a huge following on tiktok He he has filmed for the biggest stars in the world He's been entrepreneur of the year in australia He owns a page called subtle bogan traits and a group. They've 95k in that group But that's not his biggest following tiktok Tiktok is his main following. He's verified on tiktok. He's been uh, he's been he's been to court for assault twice Yeah, and but that's because the chick deserved it grievous bodily harm. I don't know about the second charge He really fucking hit her. Yeah. She was fucking. Yeah. Yeah, no, she was you're right. She shouldn't have dropped that drink Yeah, I hate it. All right without further ado. It is at its locky You have to move over now mike Oh, fuck me. We need to buy another mic Lucky we're fucking rich. Okay, locky. You're a little confused early when we said do you want to come on the podcast? You you were a bit nervous about what we're going to ask you So why don't we start by um, you just telling everyone Who the fuck you are and what the fuck you fucking do can't and how you fucking got into fucking social media Fucking 21 year old 20 year old little fucking locky. It's fucking 20 years old cunt 20 i'm 29. She's 30. How did it all start? What did you how did you start filming with shami because that's like the first yeah, well How I basically started social media when I was like 13 to 15 I had this weird Thing I would do I'd sit at home and watch x-factor. Oh, yeah And then whenever there was a good person on x-factor I'd quickly make a facebook page And then It would get a lot of likes really quickly because they were trending. Yeah, and then I would sell those pages So whoever the fuck wanted them. Oh wow and like I would sell them so cheap because I was like 13 And I would sell them for like a hundred dollars and have like 60k people on it. Oh, wow But like a hundred dollars to a 13 year old is a lot of money. It's a lot of lollies And then it just progressed. I just make like iphone meme pages and then I just sell those and then I just Worked my way up into more pages And then I finished school at year 12 Never had any interest in filming my whole entire life And I brought a cheap camera and I just started filming weddings and then yeah, I went from there And I had to meet shami and stuff because he's afraid you're filming with him first yeah, so they messaged one of the pages I was running and Wanted to do like a share for share And then they kind of looked at my profile so that I filmed and then asked me if I wanted to film for them Wow Started from there. Yeah, I just started filming for Yeah him and then and then how long were you filming and living with shami for so I lived with shami for about two years I think yeah, and then yeah, we kind of just traveled the world did vlogs did That was my main thing filming vlogs And filming little skits and stuff And then you guys Parted ways and then and then what and then you fucking and then had to start with because now you film for Jackson Yeah, yeah, sorry. I left working for shami and I just kind of had like a six months off I just played games in my room For six months. I didn't leave. I pissed everywhere. That's my boy. That's my boy. I wrote that from michael And then um, yeah, jackson was needing to go over to la and needed a film And I said, yeah, I'll do it and boom boom boom here. You are handling him in film one for Jackson for now Yeah, since like this late December. It's a nearly year. Yeah There you go. So you blocky seen some shit Yeah, he's seen some shit We're in la with locky not long ago And that is what and so I guess we can just quickly talk about the relationship you two have so we went over to la Locky was over there with Jackson and um, there's always been a bit of sexual tension with these two You know flirting here and there I'd notice like they'd both be blushing and looking at each other smiling Just little things and then we went over to la and things sort of escalated a little bit and uh, you know, the physical touches started Compliments were flowing and um, and yeah, they've uh, you guys have kissed now and you are in fact an item now You are together you are dating you were a couple Yeah Oh I'm blushing Yeah, I'm a bit shy too So, um, where where's this gonna go because there's a bit of an age gap as well. You're only fucking 20 years old When's your 21st october so next month what what dates 27? So we have to do something probably 21 It's fucking 21 and he's fucking earning more money than every single person watching What do you want to do be a birthday? I don't know maybe play some crash team racing That's all we do now guys is literally crash team racing. They just remade it. It was originally a playstation 1 game And now I got locky my boyfriend and Jackson into it. And now all we do is play crash team racing So yeah, maybe a crash team racing themed party with pingas every single time you lose you have to do a pinga Yeah, yeah, I like that. That's good Can you pass me my beer boyfriend? So, uh, you're making a bit of content now yourself locky So where do you want to what do you want to go with it? What do you want to be doing in five years time where you don't even fucking know? You just know you're just gonna be rolling in cash. You just don't know how yet. Yeah five years I don't know. It's always I've always created content Since I was like young so when I was in school we had this page called born awkward 101 Yeah, and we were just basically a copycat of the junoskians and we would just do the dumbest shit We just we literally had like 5000 likes When we were young and then we had like two haters and we stopped Because like we were so young and they really got to us. Yeah And then yeah, I've just really been making little videos here and there but not we've never really done it full time Yeah, yeah, but yeah, maybe five years I'd like to be doing it full time just doing dumb shit. Yeah. Well your tiktok will be pretty big in five years time Yeah, I know This should this should definitely get you a couple hundred thousand new followers. I was thinking. Yeah, at least 500k That's the average awesome. Then there'll be a quarter of my followers. Yeah I've already got 12 million. Oh, it's my boy It's my boyfriend. All right. We got some questions for you, dude. Yeah, there's quite a lot of interest in uh In you lucky from these from what I've heard for these questions So let's uh, let's get into the questions All right, this is for all of us this question the first one is from Big underscore chungus underscore worldwide. How much pieces of lego can you shove up your ass? Uh 16 pieces, but those are the ones with the three Dots down in the tour cross. So the pretty big one but your 16 is the answer for me. I could I've never tried it, but I reckon I could give it a good go Without going to hospital. I reckon I could do 10. I reckon you could do 13 or 14 Well, you'd have to shit him out it'd be really hard like and they get stuck because of the jagged edges I reckon I could put like 30 in there I just I'd have to go to hospital. No, you just manipulate your cheeks roll them around from side to side and the Shapes of the lego moves around inside until you get the Smooth edge that comes out it come out with the shit with the lego You're like your arsehole can expand to the size of a 50 cent piece and any lego could pass through that So if you think about a wide cock going into an arse easily stretches to 50 cent pieces So you just have to pull your cheeks open enough So that the lego can sort of and then just move your cheeks from side to side So the lego can sort of move and then come out in the right angle But you could even get your fingers in your arse and pick them out yourself another Yep, another thing. Do you just pull the cheeks apart and get a friend to help parrot tongs? You would get into a cannibal position And then sneeze all out at once You'll probably cut yourself on the way out, but at least it's all over it's fast You'd have to lube him up, but it'd just be like shelving pills. It's like ripping a band-aid off really really big big pills big pills Hard pills Great question. Great question. All right next question is from jake underscore banyard When are marty and michael going to adopt locky? Um, why would that's so fucked up think about that? That's fucked. Yeah, that would mean that it's okay for marty. Locky's dad is Fucking him So yeah, it's not it's not okay Just because of the relationship that locky and michael have so if they weren't romantically interested in each other Yes, we would definitely adopt locky. It would be a very funny video. Can you adopt someone over 18? I don't know. We should do it though. Or you could at least become a guardian. That'd be a good video I would if I had to choose a guardian it would not be any of you He's seen some shit. Oh great question. Great question Next question is from sophie dot salinas Salaninas How would you pronounce that? Salinas is Salinas is I thought michael's boyfriend was marty. Anyway, how michael and locky become boyfriends. How did I guess? You want to tell the story locky? Okay So one day we were we were taking a hike to the hollywood sign And then we we were waiting for jackson to come and we were waiting for ages And I was getting boring and we were like me and michael like, okay Let's just get a quick photo in front of the hollywood sign And then I looked at michael to see if he was ready for the photo and he looked at me And then he just came in for the kiss and then I actually captured that moment Oh, where there's a photo of them There were times beforehand where because me and locky are normally in the back seat When we're driving somewhere marty's in the front and so jackson's on me driving And like we sometimes look at each other and I know I guess I was just nervous I was nervous at the beginning But like there were times where I'd catch myself just like going into like a dream state And I just my eyes would close and I'd start leaning in and I just go closer And then there were times where it started off. He'd just ignore me like you were ignoring me I didn't know what you were doing. Yeah. Yeah, you didn't understand it And this is like there's a whole fucking, you know meet it between us But then it got to the point where He started to close his eyes and do it back And we were like getting real close But we're nervous like I hadn't spoken to my girlfriend yet about having a boyfriend And yeah, like I didn't want to actually kiss and the hollywood sign It was like it was the moment that like it was powerful a lot of overseas It was special romantic There was people watching us and we just let it out. You couldn't you couldn't not kiss. It was very There's a lot of energy. There's a lot of passion in the air. So it's just official from there really Yeah, ever since then they've sort of been just slamming each other's arse. It's pumping away like I'm like Come in the bum come the bum. Yelp. You yelp sometimes. Yeah Like imagine hitting a small dog Like that exactly like that Great question All right next questions from Oh, he's done that thing again worry screenshots when someone's Notifications come down from the top to hide the user names are sorry to whoever this is But great questions. Mary fuck kill godzilla dwayne johnson Matthew brown from wholesome um I would um I would uh I'd fuck godzilla Uh, I'd have to marry Matthew brown from wholesome Our producer. He's very uh gentle very beautiful man, and um I'd have to kill Uh dwayne the rock johnson Um Just you know, if you fuck godzilla and kill dwayne the rock johnson No one's ever gonna fuck with you again. If you have that much power You know what I mean? Oh, that's the guy that fucked godzilla. Like imagine just overpowering and fucking godzilla That's insane, but he couldn't fuck you because that's the end Yeah, and I'm pretty sure godzilla's a chick just based on how pissed off he is I don't know what we were yelling at then I'd probably Marry actually fuck it. I'd fuck matt brown I'd marry dwayne because of the cash and I'd kill godzilla to save everyone I had Of course the money the money for dwayne johnson. Yeah, boyfriends think alike. I don't want to be a one-night stand for dwayne johnson Yeah, I'm not in it for the money. I'm in it for uh for love Oh, no you kill him who dwayne. No. Yeah. No, that's what I mean. I'm not in it for the money. I mean it for love Oh, you want to marry Matthew from wholesome. Okay from he's also asked this person If you could suck your own dick, would it feel more like getting your dick sucked or sucking a dick? Oh, wow, that's pretty good. That's incredible I actually have I've not been able to like Suck my dick, but I've been able to stretch it and then get my like I've touched it with it like my Holy shit. Just just like just did an experiment as I'm a scientist I swear to fucking god, you know, I remember you're doing that a lot trying to and then yeah, it's very it was very uncomfortable Obviously if you can't suck your dick unless you're some freakishly flexible person, but I imagine it would It would be a combination of the two It'd be like 70% getting your dick sucked 30% because you go into like, you know You just rhythm and it wouldn't even feel like you're sucking a dick. Well, you compare it to giving you Tossing off it doesn't feel like you're tossing a dick. It feels like you're getting tossed off So I imagine it would be the same. Yeah, well and those questions were from Trenticles underscore 87. Thank you. Trenticles. Thank you Thank you And this is from jake dot underscore underscore dot 21 How did you meet each other and what was the weirdest things that happened in school? I hope the question is good enough It is all right. Well has to instead of school to keep locking involved. What's the weirdest shit you've seen? In your head. How did we meet each other? We met you through shami. Yeah, who you used to film for Yeah, remember the first time we met we met you guys at a Well, I don't know if it was the first time we met but the first time we hung out was at our pub And um, and then we all just got fucking hammered together during the day Especially me and marty. We did I don't think did you drink? I can't remember We just kept getting those fucking monster jugs of beer. Oh, they call the juggernauts. Yeah. Yeah, I remember that And then I remember I walked in I think it was you marty I walked in the cubicle and you're pissing all over the wall I remember that at the pub sick. We were the only people in the pub and then one other guy walks in Obviously has to be one of us that has done that Oh, man. Yeah, so we met him what like two years ago. Oh, yeah two. Yeah two and a half a year and a half Two years ago Anyway for the school thing. Yeah, you think that lockies little angel, but He's fucking done some shit done some shit at school. Yeah, haven't you locky? What did you get? What did you get expelled for? I was just used to getting so many fights Like when I say like I was like eight nine And anyone that annoyed me I just I would fight them but I wasn't an angry kid And then uh, I probably was an angry kid. I used to get in the fights with my mom Not like I wouldn't go at her she'd get angry at me and then she'd go to smack me and then I would just block it Did you ever throw one back at her? No, I never punched her in the face Not yet. Oh, yeah, it still could happen. Yeah. Yeah, mom careful She's in Nigel's basement. Yeah, I don't talk too much What's any other crazy stories? If you if you're if you're out and if you ever see locky out in a nightclub and you have a pill In your pocket doesn't even need to be a drug just anything just pop it in his mouth and he'll swallow without asking any questions Probably take it. There's been so many. Yeah. Well a couple times where I just swallow whatever I put in his mouth See him out just fucking whatever you've got on him. He'll swallow just feed him And then we'll see what happens in 40 minutes. I could be passed out. I could be dancing I would suggest giving me a ping up because you'll see some good dancing But I'll take what I can get Could be fucking chloroform All right next questions from hannah underscore robbo one would you rather swallow or spit Spit if we're talking about cum. I'd probably prefer to Spit it out. Well, I guess it's in your mouth and it is funny to say to people we have swallowed a load before Yeah, actually. Yeah, you're right. It's 50 50. So for street cred, I'd swallow the fucking thing It'd be so funny. Imagine if you came in a girl's mouth and she spat it back at you. Yeah Wow back into your mouth And then like birds Yeah, it's a spitting cum And you make the same noise as birds do when they feed each other. What noise is that? Well, we always like we I don't know I was up and he just started pumping blokes now since being with locky And we we we we spit we don't I don't know. It's weird. Yeah, I don't want to get pregnant Simple as that. I'm not getting pregnant. Yeah, it's 2019. Yeah. Yeah, you can't risk. We don't want to risk that shit Michael just pulls out and and just sprays his Chunks all over locky's back And then I slide on the floor like a slug We use his feet to slither down the Floorboards to the bathroom and he's still hard This is very graphic. How do you know this? I watch. Yeah, but I don't participate I just watch great question Great question. All right, next question is from jaden peter sen and then it's run out because I've screenshoted it And he's got a long name on instagram So this type jaden pesh la clefleur. How did locky link up with so many top-notch creators? Yeah, lucky that they linked up with him. You don't have to fucking do it I guess explain that right? Yeah, like logan paul's messaging me last week saying when can I hang out with you again? He's fucking Matt. He's you played piano for logan paul. Yeah In a The hotel that michael jackson used to live in It's fucking like the biggest penthouse slash apartment in Vegas, and they it's like what 80 grand a night 60,000 usd a night. So a hundred grand a night They got it and then you played piano for logan paul He was laying on top of the piano staring at me and I just played him a song Fuck you don't tell me about that. She's gonna say I was gonna say I can see he's getting a bit jealous Yeah, so like he's 20 years old. He all the all the biggest influences of the world. He fucking knows him They come to him They come to him. That's why he's here. We came to him some even come in him Great question Next question seb dot wadrow. What is locky's sexuality? Are you bi? Are you straight? Yeah, yeah, I'm straight locky's straight Yeah, obviously, but yeah, they he fucks Michael and he fucks guys, but yeah, he's straight I'm not gay. I just fuck Michael bi. He's just he's just he fucks Michael. He's just a straight guy that fucks guys Exactly. I can see that. Okay Thought that was pretty obvious. Great question Great question. This one's from linden bc 24. Do you guys pay locky or does he get paid from videos as well? Well, well if when locky comes along and helps us out and stuff Yeah, or he he sometimes locky will get us some work and then we give him a little bit of money But yeah, the people he works for it does work for yeah, they pay him. So he gets paid via social media This one's from marty and mickey underscore are Who's loudest out of youtube when it comes to sex me and you? No, it depends who's going but depends he's doing the pumping. I yelp Michael more like more of a roar In terms of decibels though, I've yeah, I would say that Michael from what I've heard Michael's definitely louder Funny enough though, Michael's got the bigger dick Yeah, Michael is a triangle dick, but I'm not a I'm not a suck You know, I don't I don't suck about I just take it takes it. Yeah, it does a bit of yelping and then they swap That's my boy. This is really fucked up Aren't you glad you came on this? How did locky fall out the window from locky wall underscore 17 So there was a video on locky's instagram of um Me pushing him out of the window guy of a geese. It was an accident. It was just a joke gone wrong in uh in la I was michael's like pulled his phone. I was like we go scare locky and like pretend to push him out the window But the sill is the window sill is like quite low. It's like it's like knee height It's we piss out of there into the spa. Yeah, and um locky was like leaning out the window I went to scare him and it scared him so much that he fell forwards Two stories and landed on his fucking back No, I spent a day in hospital. So that wasn't fun. Sorry about that Not dead. Yeah, exactly So, um, that's how we fell out the window. Great question Oh two more and this is how many times do you masturbate or suck michael's or marty's dick for money asking for their friend These questions this is from miss morgan kelly some of these questions are very uh very sexually based And i'm not sure why but anyway answer the question Well, you don't do it for money for me. It's for free We just don't Be were buds normally like we got we don't have like it's more weekend Shit because we get a bit drunk and then we act out because we're still so new to this shit that like You know, it's only just started la was the first time we kissed Now it's like we have a few beers and then shit happens. I can't remember half the sex we have I was on blackout But like I know that it I can't As far as I know, I'm having sex with a girl when Mark is in doggy Yeah, he's got the long lush blondish sandy blonde hair reddish and he arches his back like a chick too He's getting fucked like his chest is on the mattress and he's just like I think he's trying to like smell the ground I've seen him grab like his hand and put it on his boobs and he'll squish his pecs here like that So it feels like he's got a tit Yeah, Marty was watching and then he'll push back unlock his cock into it. Yeah, I always try to tell him not to like pump I just want to do all the work But yeah, that's yeah, as I said, it's when We're drunk and I don't remember half of it, but I always come Great question Last question last question something a little bit different from what we've been talking about This is from dream work dream works factory. What kind of music do you like techno? They're assuming like techno um, I like um Fuck he's a different shit. He's like classics. He's like classics. Yeah, we're old We're like people we like music that was popular when we were favorite band 18 probably the food fighters or um Miley Cyrus Mine's black sabbath. If you look to our right here, that is an original 1970s black sabbath poster That's scary. Yeah. Yeah, it's haunted apparently one of the Osborne's the one on the far right Which would be your left if you're watching this I just listened to like a lot of mumble rap, you know, I'm one of them and classics. I like classics Yeah, yeah, look, he's a great great dj whenever we are driving with him He puts the playlist on and we never ever like yeah, that's why I'm with him. He's a good guy Okay guys, um, that is the end of the fan questions and that is the end of our special guest segment with uh, Lachlan got free uh, go and follow him on all of his social medias Um, he's a fucking genius. He's 20 years old and he's better than everyone that watches this He's he's nearly up there with us. That's how good he is So, uh, what's your handles? He just said it. It's locky. It's it's lats la cci My mom was drunk tick tock Is that actually how you spell your name? Yeah, la cclan is tasteful my name and his mom was hammered Yeah, all right. Locky. Thanks for coming on the show, man. We'll fucking see you soon, brother We fucking love you to pieces I'm just gonna kiss each other. Goodbye. What a lovely way to end that segment All right, it's time for our next segment and the segment name has been changed this week. It's uh, been renamed to And this of course is just where we talk about an old story that's happened to us and this week's story is the time we Had a little shitty tv show and they canceled it on us because of our behavior Yeah, fuck All right, so this was like 2016 or some shit and you wouldn't even really call it a tv show it was like community tv so you like it's One state your show is shown in yeah, and it's like like just shit quality low production shit But a lot of big a lot of big TV personalities start on community tv like rove Really rove started on brisk 31 Anyway, we had a show and um, that's actually how we met Jackson and show me as well We got him on the show as guests, but as soon as they um, as soon as we had the first episode ready to air I wrote the monologue and we were doing this show with uh, two other guys and um, they hated it straight away They couldn't take a joke this just it's just So the tv station just couldn't handle the monologue, but now looking back at it. You don't Pay out the people who are fucking feeding you. It's like biting the hand that feed you if so this channel that gave us this opportunity for this show We basically in the monologue of our show Put him down like they were scum fucks They are though So it's just fun to take the piece out of it and they they should know that and just be able to take a Fucking joke Anyway, that set the precedent for the rest of the season and they just hated us and we're trying to stop us at every turn Who had a contract written up so they couldn't but then Two episodes before we were due to finish the season and um Get paid they they uh, we had the show cancelled because mark and I were doing this segment out in the streets Where um, we were interviewing drunk people asking them, you know, I forget what we were even asking them But we had to make them sign these forms saying that they give permission For us to put them on tv And our product was a big line of people and our production system making everyone sign and then we had like a fucking stack of Waves like this high You know of people that have given consent for themselves to be on tv Then the episode as So one bitch calls in and complains, you know, they never can send anything She did she fucking signed the way of a dumb drunk for god She was so fucking sick The tits were over her back Like she just wouldn't she wouldn't have her tits here. She'd flip them over her back because they were so fucked I think And anyway, she was yeah, just a real nasty bitch. Just wanted to fucking. Yeah, this is gonna hurt my work Fucking interview get interviewed Anyway, flipped bitch fucking teeth flipping her tits over her shoulders as she was talking to us. Anyway, then the Station was like, oh, this this girl's putting a formal complaint Do you have the the waivers and then we looked for the waivers and they're fucking gone And um, and so they're like what the fuck you like this she could sue us for you know defamation Blah blah blah big tit back Tits on the back Ploppy fucking boobs just all over her back and shoulders hairy chest Really upside down underneath breast thing knees buckling. Fuck ankles thicker than her body And um, she uh, I don't think she was even I can't even remember what she looks like to be honest Oh, yeah, I just remember that. Yeah, there was tits on her back Yeah, no that definitely sounds like her And uh, yeah, so she put in a formal complaint and they tore her contract up two weeks out before we would you to finish the season And get paid So we didn't get paid and we spent all this money and got into a lot of debt because of it and uh, fuck you bitch Yeah, it's Like far out just like yeah, and it's like she could have it could have been worse She could have sued and then we would have been bloody Really fucked but um, yeah, we just lost the show and then we just went back to the internet And then from that point on it took like another year and a half before we got anywhere Like tv's dead anyway, and Good thing that happened from that show was we met Jackson and shami We met a lot of cool people and yeah, and yeah, mike goldman from big brother came on as a guest Michael beverage from big brother came on as a guest susie taylor came on Susie taylor Who else fucking came on the show? Uh, just some other some other youtubers. We had brock paulkey Yeah, owner of blokes advice We had um, it was it was a fun. It was fun. Arnie donna came on come on. Arnie donna. They're amazing Yeah, we had some fucking cool people come on the show And that was that was the best part of it We got to meet some cool people and we got to be on a tv set We and we had to do our own little segment. We had the tit challenge. It was called competitions. Yeah, we are one And then I got to as the winner I got to the michael's overall punishment for the entire season was that I got to pick the tattoo that That I put on michael and we went to the tattooist and it was all set and he's like, oh, yeah, all right And michael was like blindfolded. He didn't know what he was going to get And then I had to tell the tattoo artist what I wanted to get on his ass And it was so vulgar that he was like no, no I'm not doing that and he got really upset with me because I suggested this it was pretty fucked I wanted to get on michael I Fuck kids like imagine if I would get that covered up if that was it's pretty oh like 50 I might have gotten that covered up. I can't guarantee that it is a shocking thing to have on your body But yeah, I can see why I said no and then we ended up just getting I have herpes on him Which is like it was funny and there's little red dots on it So really I lose because he likes it. Yeah, it looks cool. It's pretty It shocks girls and then anyway the tv station had to um go online and then they fucking shit and fuck you Fucking dumb dogs were the best and you guys are just fucked Well that tv station that we did that show is now shut down. Is that what you just said something like that? Yeah, all right on to our last segment of the show Um, and of course it is the the uh, the prank call, but the segment has been renamed Do you guys want to know what it's been renamed to do you want? It's been renamed to that Holy shit my ears hurt So basically it's just a prank call and for this week. I'm going to um What was I gonna do again? Oh really strange. Oh, yeah, I'm gonna just be really weird. I'm just gonna say very strange things Do weird noises and just really try and fuck with them a little bit. Domino's has been hanging up on us A fair bit lately, so I don't know if we'll be able to go with them Okay, so here comes the prank call everyone get ready. So you call domino's aspley Here we go I'm gonna be lucky. He just kissed me. He just blew a kiss at me Yeah, good day, mate. Can I just make a pickup order, please? Can I just make a pickup order, please? Yeah Can I just get a couple um, I'll have a um Beef basement outside put some stairs down the railings and I'll be back later on to give you the final invoice I'll just have a barbecue meatlovers, please one on And um, then can I also get a Large breasts a Hawaiian please on a uh pan Um, and what are the uh, are there any sort of two pizzas inside? Any side specials? Yeah for pickup Oh, yeah, um Yeah, I don't know last time I garlic bread there Last time I garlic bread there, uh, my legs were shaking until I started Falling backwards for a little while, but um, I guess I'll get some garlic bread and um, Wander down the city streets and sing to the cattle Yes, I'll so I'll just I'll uh, confirm the garlic bread and I'll also get a um, a drink. Do you guys have any? um bottled grass bottled grass Bottled grass with vinegar in it No, we have only Pepsi Pepsi Max Oh, yeah, I think that bottled grass with vinegar. I think uh, the american term is mountain dew So I'll get a mountain dew my fake no shneelu pain tin tin. I'm knocking on the neighbor's windows, man And I'll also just get so can you just read that order back to me now? Yeah, so we've got one large barbecue meatlovers and I've thrown it downstairs And then I've got one Hawaiian on a pan and I've been stomping on that thing for four hours and then we've got The garlic bread which I've thrown in the oven and then yelled at my wife and then a um mountain dew which I've poured Down a hill Yeah, and then can I just get one more um side I'll just get a um Massaman chicken curry and a um tie beef salad Do you have any? Do you have any live salmon with electric fence? Sorry, do you have any live salmon with electric fence? There's a chair downstairs No, we have only pieces Only pieces no sandwich. Oh, sorry. I'm just doing the electrical work on a penthouse where I used to live So, uh, just excuse my um thumping headache. My balls are big Where are you? All right, sweet. Well, I might take my horse down there tie it to the back and then stick a knife in its throat No, no, and I'm not gonna Where am I? All right, sweet. All right, so um I'll come and oh can I just put can I just come and get that um on saturday? I just need to um roll in some glad wrap and spit on my uncle So this is just Yeah, yeah, just but can I just can I just book this in for pick up on saturday saturday The 17th of october 2021 I'm blind. I can't see right now You know it like straight away. He'd be up with something like what the fuck's wrong with you when you start He's like jibber jabbing his final sentence was oh, sorry wrong number Shut the fuck off. That's the wrong now. We know exactly who we're calling Fucking well, I can't believe he doesn't crack up there. It's so hard not to laugh I saw you you almost cracked it at the pouring mountain I liked it when you said you was shoving the garlic bread into the oven and yelling at your wife Okay, that is the end of episode number 27 And uh, we'd just like to finish this episode by thanking our sponsors. Fuck. We're the best We're the best. We're the best. We're the best. We're the best