 Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa sallallahu ala Sayyidina Muhammad wa ala adihi wa sahbihi wa sallam In the name of God the most gracious the most compassionate and may his peace and blessings be upon our dear beloved messenger Muhammad and Upon his family and his companions and all those who sincerely just try To follow his example until the last day My name is Aaron a.k.a. Haroon sellers Hamdulillah, I accepted Islam in 1994 and Currently Work at Zaituna College at the top of a mountain in Berkeley, California. Hamdulillah America's first accredited Muslim liberal arts college a father of four daughters and And so far my wife hasn't given up for me. So Hamdulillah 25 years so far Hamdulillah How's everybody doing? Hamdulillah, I think that's that that fasting Hamdulah. So yeah, we're in that that last hour So if anybody nods off, I'm not gonna take it personally. It's it's okay Hamdulillah who's uh Who here it's their very first Ramadan anybody? Oh supama two people Hamdulillah first Ramadan Allah Akbar How about anybody? This is their second or third like first to fifth. This is your second Then what about you second third? Okay Okay, Hamdulillah fifth and what you raised your hand. I think sister Six okay, Hamdulillah Allah Akbar all praise and thanks be to Allah who Brung us to another one inshallah get another one under our belt We pray that we go all the way to the end and cross the finish line Inshallah so we can eat drink and praise the Lord like the Prophet saw us on commanded us And I was so happy to read that hadith likes literally commanding us to eat drink and praise the Lord So Hamdulillah will make it to do that I'm considering this is the hour, you know that That kind of nerve-wracking hour Before breaking the fast. I'll try to keep this light and then very open and easy on everybody inshallah no quizzes But it's it's really a it's it's really something to be really thankful for That you're able to fast and break your fast attached to some type of community and With some type of knowledge. Is there anybody here who experimented with fasting before they accepted Islam raise your hand. Oh Okay Several people and so for those who raise your hand, maybe yourself sister How did you come to do that? Like how did you know? Muslims fasted and Like how did you even know how to fast? Okay Okay So was it was it like a book or somebody told you like hey, here's how you fast Savannah, well, how did how did you find out like how do you do this Muslim fasting? Like was it through her or sort like a you read an article or a book? Okay Awesome, okay, excellent Okay, I'm do anybody else. How did you who I've got else who else raised their hand that they tried fasting for how did you find out about it? Yeah Mmm in that deep. Yeah Okay, one more person who experimented how was right male I reward them. They did their best That's all I asked for just do your best male I reward them for every fast you've done since then they get a Big portion of that inshallah that that's really beautiful Well myself I also I'm asking that question because I also experimented with fasting before like signing up, you know to be a Muslim and I thought I would share a poem that I wrote About that experience because I was very impacted by it So I wrote this on my break at work since I wasn't taking the typical lunch break that day But actually once I would this was in a period where I was investigating Islam And I knew that Muslims fasted as I said, yeah, let me give it a try and see what that's like And I also convinced my friend My friend Chris who was all who was actually the guitars in the alternative rock band that I was the lead singer in At the time so he thought it was a cool Alternative idea to try and so we're like we picked the day and we said, okay, we're gonna fast on this day and So what I wrote is Feeling kind of dizzy because of the fast But I've got to make it. No, I'm sorry. My head is spinning. There we go My head is spinning the first line is literally my head is spinning And I think we can all relate with that first line My head is spinning. How long will I last? Feeling kind of dizzy because of the fast But I've got to make it. I've got to take it Try not to fake it. Try not to break it Because I believe I shall receive what I'm looking for if I break through the door Again and again I bow and nod humbling myself to the will of God Because what I want to know might not be shown God has keys to knowledge unknown. I'm out for my own when I make the endeavor Some say I'm stupid. Some say I'm clever Some people think I'm wasting my time, but their souls theirs and my soul's mine Sometimes I think that I'll wait until I'm dead, but every single day it burns in my head It permeates my thoughts permeates my dreams Sometimes I feel like the product of a scheme But I don't want to wait until I'm dead to know what I want to know. I want to know now instead I owe it to my soul to try Some wonder why I'm on the level I'm on. I'm coming from the Bible and then the Quran Two great books one short one long, but one says words and the other are wrong It says that the words we have now are residual Seems kind of right because I can't find the original But I don't want a man to tell me what to do. So I'm waiting for my Lord to guide me through And so that was literally a song that we recorded in the group called the fasting song. So the the interesting Unwritten conclusion to that scenario was so Chris picked me up from work and his head was spinning too and You know, it was a nine to five. So we still had some time to go we went back to his house and We're all of course obsessing over what we're gonna eat, you know, we break our fast and being two single musicians The only thing we could come up with was some ramen noodles some noodles and noodles So you're gonna have some noodles and noodles and And So we're just waiting talking kind of reflecting spacing out Hits increasing least spinning even more and more and it got to the point I remember and that's what's interesting even about kind of sitting on the floor like this. We started kind of like Walking around this house and stuff and then we went to sitting in the chair And then we ended up like sitting on the floor like this and then we ended up like It's like this just littered there was one of these big circular clocks on like the opposite wall and I just remember how long we stared at that clock and We were just waiting until 1201 Midnight because I thought you didn't break your fast to the next day. That's what I thought Well some fast, you know 30 days So I was like, okay, we're gonna try that and I didn't think you broke your fast the next day And I swear that the time it took from the clock to go from 12 to 1201 It seemed like an eternity So when it follows like click like Oodles of noodles, you know, we like attack those noodles. They were like the best Oodles and noodles I've ever had till this day. How do you love? so fast forward We're at the musket That I was advised to go to Because the sister told me may God reward her. She said if you want to free Quran just go to this much it in false church Dari hid your musket. I Had been reading the Quran up to you know to that point and then Chris, you know He said he wanted to read some Quran too So he kept barring my Quran and I got tired of that and so I was like dude you need to get your own Quran and Then the sister ma'sha'Allah Aisha who gave me my first Quran at the record store that I was working at To make a long story short She said hey if you go to this mosque over here in false church now far away from you guys live They'll give you a free one. I was like and especially because the Quran was pretty thick with the Arabic and English I was like, they'll give me a free one of those that book looks expensive, you know Just like no just go telling you they'll give you a free one So we go there and Hamdulillah the record we walked in there with shorts and tank tops and earrings and Everything and the man ma'sha'Allah. He came out. He was wearing a nice two-piece suit with pinstripes Very well groomed all gray hair and he just smiled at us with this big smile He was like sure you can have a free Quran I was like are you for real like free free like F-R-E-E and he's like and he laughed and he was like yes, but come talk to us first You know just let's sit in my office And Hamdulillah After a good conversation a few other Interesting events I signed up for Islam, you know in that moment. I said yeah, this is it. I took my shahada Chris wasn't quite ready at that time But he was very happy to get the free Quran and I was very happy to get my Quran back To continue the reading Hamdulillah And Hamdulillah he did eventually a couple months after that except Islam as well and still my best friend till this day Hamdulillah, I wish he was right right right here with me Telling his side of the the fasting song Hamdulillah, but I'm also saying that to say that Like a Hamdulillah for guidance and that we have teachers, you know, that's why we don't Want to do it yourself Islam You know you this is a big blessing to see you all here in this situation attached to some type of community and Learning how to fast well and obviously it's a lifelong Effort, you know fasting. It's not just so you do it once or twice or 30 days and you're like a pro You know, this has been what 28 years or so for me and I'm still feeling like it's my first Ramadan You know what I mean? But and I just wanted to discover a couple couple things in that regard Firstly everybody by now is probably memorized that verse in the Quran from chapter 2 verse 183 where Allah says what may be translated as oh you who believe Fasting is prescribed for you as it was prescribed for those before you that you may develop what? God consciousness Hamdulillah, this was very appealing to me as a convert God saying that it was been prescribed for this Community as it was prescribed for those before you that really appealed to me as a Christian I was familiar and with the idea of fasting from the Bible from the gospel in the Old Testament You hear fasting 30 day and no fasting 40 days and 40 nights Right, but there were no like really details to that So what I really appreciate again as a convert this this verse because it gave me a sense of continuity But also it was a reminder that fasting is is something that That our Creator prescribed and it's something perennial like it's a cross human history this Spiritual practice of fasting and that's something we should take some honor in that Also, we too now as a Muslim community and followers of the the last of the prophets peace be upon them We get to partake in something that Allah has prescribed as a spiritual practice and Very distinct and unique way of spiritual development that's been going on You know since humans have been on the earth And so we should also it's a struggle, but that's a reminder We should feel a sense of honor in that struggle as well because it's not something that Allah just imposed on us to be You know strict, you know with us, you know, I mean Allah is not a no He's not an oppressor he forbade him himself from oppressing oppression So it's something when it feels hard just remember that this is something that's been happening in humankind since the beginning And we're just part of that Continuance insha'Allah we pray that we're amongst those who you know keep it going past the baton To those who are next insha'Allah In that regard I didn't want to especially since I like I said I work at Zaituna College with In the company of many great teachers and great students as well But one of our faculty members who some of you may have met or heard or seen because he also lectures here Cajun, Dr. Ali Atayi I recorded and shared a very Profound lecture by him on the Zaituna College YouTube channel where he discusses and goes through fasting in Judaism Christianity in Islam and he maps it out in a very brief format and then a Year ago that this video was maybe Six or seven years ago Yeah, maybe about six years ago, but then last year he did a Podcast recording and that I recorded with him at the college as well Where he expanded on that and it's even like at length He has a full episode on fasting and Judaism full episode on fasting and Christianity and a full episode on fasting in Islam And it's really really informative and I think very very beneficial As a as a convert so if you just type in Zaituna College Ali Atayi fasting in YouTube you should find it if you type in Zaituna College podcast Ali Atayi you should find it shalom. If not, you can definitely reach out to me as well as yourself I can give you the direct links and you can share it, you know with the group I think you would find find that very enriching inshallah Next from the hadith, you know are the other source that that we take inspiration and guidance from The companion Abu Huraira may Allah be pleased with him He reported that Allah's messenger may Allah bless him and grant him peace said what may be translated as Who ever observes fast during the month of Ramadan out of sincere faith and hoping to attain Allah's rewards Then all of his or her past sins will be forgiven Now that is a I mean God like what a deal Like all we have to do is just refrain You know not tell 12-1-1 midnight right We just got to refrain for a few hours whatever that happens to be that season Right and not just from food and drink as we know it's not just refraining from food and drink. It's also other actions and especially character traits as Well that we should be avoiding and also character traits that we should be bringing on it But all we have to do is just hang on and do that Sincerely, you know at the root of it. There has to be sincere sincerity in it. I and For 30 days and look what we get everything just wiped out like your newborn baby And that's why they say though that at the end of Ramadan the only Person that's not forgiven is the person who refused it and that's something at the end of Ramadan The only person not forgiven is the person that just refused that's how open and available Allah's forgiveness is During this month in this particular Hadith meant a lot to me too because it was a reminder that Jesus didn't have to die for me to forgot to forgive me didn't not at all and Even technically we know it's not we're it's not just literally by our actions That we're forgiven as a prophet Muhammad peace be upon him told us and reminded us that we're forgiven by grace ultimately That we are commanded to be an upright community and be virtuous and get out there and act and Ramadan is just one of those acts But ultimately we are forgiven by grace and from his grace. He's given us a means and from his grace He didn't require that prophet Jesus who many of us any of us I would you know who were anybody else from a Christian background Right, that's the good news like we know gospel means good news Don't you think that's good news that he didn't have to die for us to be forgiven? I? Think that is great news, and I think if you were to ask me like as like a checkbox or or a choice whether God could forgive me in order for God to forgive me with Jesus have to die or God forgives me without him dying. What would you choose? And a lot gave us that you know Ramadan is just one of them you get forgiven just given salams To your fellow, you know Muslims just spreading salams as a means of forgiveness So many other things do this do this forgiven forgiven do this forgiven Say this some things you just say it and it's a means of forgiveness Right, so how do love what a blessing what what what a gift we have to this? And so it's been a blessing for me Yeah, fasting now for for 28 years, but it did At one point it was kind of daunting You know when I really thought about what I'm doing for 30 days, and then I've done this you Know for over 20 years You have to ask yourself like what's the result of that like what's the impact of me doing something? Especially in this day and time like that's something pretty significant You know what I mean to actually do something like a Ramadan in today's day and age in That the whole purpose of it is to develop a closer relationship to God a closer relationship To your friends family neighbors co-workers, right It's not literally just for you and let alone ultimately through that a closer relationship with with God Right because fasting is easy to hide from people You know unless they're around you in that last 10 minutes, you know We start acting kind of off and they ask you what's the matter with you? You know, but generally it's pretty easy to hide Right, and that's what's so beautiful that specifically a law says the reward of fasting is his he will reward for it specifically with a specific type of reward Right So hum do love fasting it's tough, but a hum do love for fasting But I went through a stage with it where I really was like Kind of getting down on myself about it. I'm like gosh, man. I've been fasting like 10 12 13 14 20 Ramadan's and like Look at my character. You know what I mean? Like There should be like a real Some type of mark on a person who's done something like that that many times You know and when you know what the What the goal of that is and so I looked at a lot of the things that I was had written like poems I had written Over the years and all and I noticed I was always writing these really kind of like dark poems and I looked at the dates They were right before Ramadan So I was like, oh, there's like a pattern here right before Ramadan seemed like I go through something Every single time and then I realized okay like It just reinforced that there's deep spiritual realities to what we're doing here Spiritually it is much deeper than just not eating and drinking And so forth and that's why we have that warning woe to the one who got nothing from their fast But hunger and thirst that's all they got out of it No, it should be something more but at the same time That hadith about how Allah took it upon himself To reward for fasting that gave me some like Okay, I can do this but don't like beat myself up about it as a matter of fact My weaknesses are just a sign of my humanity and the way God made me You know that we're gonna have these peaks and these dips, you know, it's a roller coaster Sometimes but now I want to share something shall love you guys don't mind that I wrote after Sometime experiencing this fasting thing as a Muslim a day of fasting is a day of caution Feeling fatigued from desires exhaustion Pass or fail is a matter of the unseen So struggle I must to keep my record clean They tune up for the soul more vital than a car To clean up a sinful heart and crusted like tar It's been a little while since I entered this state. I taste a bitter patience during my tasteless weight The sting of thirst settles in as well as painful memories of sin Realizing how much my soul has been ignored Realizing that true hunger is distance from my Lord Realizing careless words that cut like a knife Realizing I have never been truly hungry in my life Realizing I have much longer to go than I thought Realizing that purification is not easily bought But it is a gift for the sick and diseased It is a gift from a Lord well pleased Like one searching all his life for a lost treasure Can we survive one second outside of his pleasure? Oh, how I hope that he is pleased with me when I return How I hope to be shown my mistakes now that I might learn Learn to draw near like those that draw nearest Learn to make a place in my heart where his remembrance is dearest Thoughts crystal clear now To see the ways of error Reflection upon that great day its rewards and its terror Clear is the way of the rejecters who have fled from his life Clear is the way of the reflectors who flow with insight Increasing in certitude of the overwhelming event Increasing in sensitivity to how time is best spent Followers of the prophets whose restraint gave them power Manifestors of truth Satan can't devour Oh consumers of the illicit no shame in how we're behaving Is the permissible not sufficient to satisfy our cravings? Are you a Muslim or a fool? Accept this invitation to a pool Fid by a river whiter than milk sweeter than honey For those whose Lord was God not sex food and money Rejoicing that the life of this world is a goner Waiting for that first glance at the one full of majesty bounty and honor How joyful these thoughts as my heart seems to soften Surely I said fast more often Something like that something like that Something like that Hamdulillah. Thank you. Thank you for that that feedback. There's Many many poems many songs Hamdulillah that I do hope to compile and share for the sake of Allah All of it's about this journey That I'm wanting and that we're on Yes, I contributed some lines to it. Yeah with the Sheikh Mohammed Mendez to had some some Hamdulillah And Hamdulillah in in summary I'm saying that to say again as you can just hear in that poem. It is a very like Ramadan is a process You know, and it's it's a deep physical process, but a very spiritual process And we should you know, especially as the days You know continuing Ramadan just remind ourselves of those those aspects of Ramadan And to remember the hadith for the prophet upon him Bega's blessings and peace said what may be translated as Every good deed of Adam's son the children of Adam is for him Except fasting it is for me and I shall reward the fasting person for it Hamdulillah so everything in this month as we know is multiplied That's something I'd like to remember as a person Uh As a person who likes video games personally Everything is multiplied and so I'm always looking at these connection points try to make these connection points with pop culture or something in In culture and our beautiful faith And so Ramadan is literally like the the bonus level the points multiplier level Everything is multiplied So don't feel overburdened by anything If you feel weak physically Just say something just say subhanAllah And know that it's multiplied just say hamdulillah And know that it's multiplied Just say leh leh lillah know it's multiplied If your mouth is too dry to say anything just try to squeeze out a smile This smile and the reward of smiling in Ramadan is multiplied Everything we do Big or small in Ramadan is multiplied without Uh A limited count because it's with Allah The reward is with him and we know for sure it's multiplied So I'm saying that to remind myself when I feel kind of beat up about Ramadan sometimes and just My head is spinning I'm like come on. I run just SubhanAllah Can't you just say subhanAllah Okay, mouth is pasty just Just go smile at somebody smile at your children Smile at your wife Smile at your co-worker Or just smile at Allah just Allah hamdulillah, you know And that's what I wanted to share today it's all multiplied may Allah accept From from all of us and multiply our rewards and Give us good greetings Good meetings and at the end of this good eating inshallah, okay Khulas did I fulfill the request? Okay Hamdulillah That's it for me great Hamdulillah Sure sure people Oh sure sure we can do that If anybody wants to take a nap or you know The prayer area is so nice and dimly lit over there. It's like asking for a nap I wanted to ask you I Me and My sweetheart are having debates over my fasting He because I have diabetes He says I'm sick and I shouldn't fast I say I can handle this And I do have water with my medicines, but I am fasting from food And so the reason I do this is because I could eat I could say okay. Yeah, I don't like calling myself sick because I don't think of myself as sick. I have diabetes It's a health condition. Right. Right. So I think to myself if I don't eat I feel that Allah will be I just have to say it this way will be proud of me You know that's a deep one That's a deep one So is your question like kind of what I think about that? Yeah, because like I want fast and I don't consider myself sick And I feel like Allah will bless me more if I do fast even though I don't have to is that a good way to say it? Yeah, I get it Thank you. Well First of all disclaimer, you know, no Not a medical professional. I'm not a Islamic scholarly professional Just your brother. I've learned a few things and if there's something I have a confident understanding of I'm going to share that And if I don't I'll just say I don't know Or I'll say, you know ask someone here at the mcc, you know, who's more knowledgeable and can get you an answer But I will say since you disclosed something very personal. I have diabetes as well And hamdulillah. I'm so far. It hasn't prevented me from fasting but even the most important thing before that is that Whether we fast or not the most important thing is it's just obedience, you know, to Allah's upon Allah. It's not And sometimes the tough word obedience, you know submission But no, but look who we're trying to submit to and be obedient to like alhamdulillah, you know but fasting Or your choice to not fast Both of those are be obedience to Allah and they're equal So if you're choosing the fast and it's sincere then The the form of that fast is a specific form. It's refraining from food and drink and water and all that That's the the fast of the prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So if you do that you are rewarded for that But that same lord that decreed that also gave exemptions For that under certain conditions and you have to get medical help And you also have to consult your you know, what you know of your condition because no one knows how you feel natural but you So do know that if you don't fast at all And you're doing that out of knowledge knowing that Allah himself has given you that exemption that itself is Reward as well because you're doing that with knowledge You're not just saying oh, I don't feel like fasting that's different Then I can't fast or fasting in this way With all of its conditions meaning fasting from food and drink and the you know intimate relations and and so forth That is the complete fast to not do that from knowledge Same reward So don't again that was one of my points In in my presence. You don't beat yourself up Because you could also a lot could be displeased with you taking on a hardship That he didn't put on you. It's something you're doing yourself All right, and that's really important and it's something he's he says about the the monks The christian monks and concerning monasticism, you know swearing off, you know Marriage and intimacy, you know with the spouse Uh, he says in the quran and paraphrase. It's something that they put on themselves We did not put them on them and they didn't even fulfill it Like they didn't really give it its due And so upon on don't we see problems? You know, especially in the catholic community where that's uh, you know A dominant practice of the priests and nuns is this celibacy Allah says they put that on themselves. We did not put them on them that on them and they didn't even give it its its due So that's a big lesson about you know, in a in a in a warning about Not putting on ourselves hardships Unnecessarily that don't come from the Lord Because Allah desires ease for us. He desires success for us Okay, so I hope that helps. It's not a fatwa You know, it's just something to really think about because I want you to take care of yourself physically And I want you to take care of yourself spiritually and I want you to have a really healthy Eternal relationship with a lot. I want you to burn out Right because some of these things make converse burn out You know, like I can't do this too hard and they don't realize no, there's a way out You know, there's a way and you taking that is worship and just as much reward That's a multiplied reward for just obeying him through not harming yourself Unnecessarily So Is that okay? Yes, thank you And thank you for saying that about subhanallah because I got nauseous a few times. I didn't know what to say Subhanallah Allah Akbar Alhamdulillah Anybody else Waelicam Salam Just any type of advice My struggle with Ramadan. It's not the food. It's not water it's lack of sleep because I work and um, I'm a teacher so I was we were fortunate Anyone that teaches in school. We had this week off this last week was off. So we started. Oh, right spring break Yeah, yeah spring breaks. Right. So hamdallah hamdallah And so I got a chance to sleep in, you know a little bit but now When I because I wake up for four In the morning because I drink water for like an hour before I You know every 20 minutes I drink water. It's just to get water in my system before I eat So long story short, there's no going back to sleep. You know once the time comes in And so coming home in the evening Sometimes taking a nap that late in the evening is a challenge. You know, so I don't know like Do you have any suggestions? Yeah, well that struggle is real as they say the struggle is real um Something I've been doing is taking the nap in the car at work And uh, if that's something that you can find a way to do That's something I'd recently started trying Ramadan That's something I I recently started experimenting with is taking a power nap during doing work during Ramadan And that's been really really helpful. I started doing that this month Just last week And it was a big help because the sleep it that's a big struggle For myself too. I'm sure Plenty of others can vouch for that and besides like Trying to commit to to getting up for sewhore like when you're in the state that you know that you're praying That's helped to give you a little bit of energy So, you know as opposed to forgetting to wake up for sewhore missing sewhore that kind of adds to the to the struggle But I would definitely encourage trying to see if you can get a power nap On a breakout at work, you know take that 30 minutes Or if you got a job where you have a 30 minute and two 15 minutes Just kind of go somewhere if there's some place um In the workplace where you can kind of have a little private corner You know just to close your eyes for that period if not If you can do that in your car, but don't forget to leave the crack in the window And find a little some shade or something Just try taking a nap and see if that that helps with that Um, obviously when you get home if you have a little time, you know before breaking the fast, you know, it's it's it's obviously Encouraged to stay awake during that time, you know as much as possible, especially even in general Sleeping after osso between osso and mugrib is discouraged But in this case try it You know if you got to take another power nap as soon as you get home before you break fast Just don't forget to set in the locker that happened to me the other night and I didn't wake up till after midnight And I feel like I missed like the everything um So yeah, and if there's anybody else who you know, this isn't like a one person show if anybody else has Advice feedback on that but that's something I've been trying to do now taking a nap and At work and that's been really helpful for me personally Insha'Allah Anybody else any other if it's not questions, I could just be thoughts or Or somebody just wants to take the mic and say supon a lot. No problem Allah like but Anybody else any other thoughts? I was thinking because I was like, yeah, it's kind of to keep it on the topic of Ramadan So um, but I don't know this is just something well two things like as a christian You know, you know just speaking to christian, you know family or you know about like the crucifixion. It's almost like It it's so emotional and it's like the crux of christianity and There's you can't really speak logically about it or you're right because it's just so emotionally bound to the christian paradigm It's what unites all of christians too They don't all believe certain things, but that is one of the things that they're all united on right. So it's something that's um How do you You know what I mean? I just I feel like that's kind of the point like like my mom for instance. Mashallah. She's She's like amazing and she actually she's like she's like when I eat you when I When I call out to god, I say Allah god, you know, she believes in the prophet Muhammad But when it comes to the crucifixion, it's like She she she can't let go of it right and so it's just it's like really amazing So I'm just kind of wondering here from your experience or just in dawah or you know what I'm saying like how do we kind of How do we bridge that in the sense that we know that that? Um that someone was made to look like east at east of them You know I'm saying so it almost makes sense that they would believe that So kind of what just from your experience your perspective on that Well, one thing is like I said sometime you got to do the uh The multiple choice thing that I mentioned you know like If you had a choice if the choice was yours that In order for god to forgive you He had to kill jesus who didn't do any of this Or He could forgive you just by grace and you making a sincere effort you saying sorry Just ask sometimes just reducing it down to just Presenting it some type of rational Kind of multiple choice It puts it in a different context because ultimately it's it's it's something that For for christian that's salvation You know myself when I was uh Starting to read the quran and read more into it. That was the one issue for me personally. I was like, yeah, I believe god is one I don't believe jesus is god um Everything i'm reading but then when it got to that particular issue That they didn't kill nor crucified him only a likeness of that was shown to him And with no other details I was it like put me in my crisis Like what am I supposed to do and then I had to really work through that like well, what does That issue really involved for me. Why do I feel so attached to it because that's to do it how we're forgiven Right and that's one of the gifts of religion is a means of forgiveness Right Like how do we write our wrongs? You know not just there's writing our wrongs that we do from one human to another right that's one But then how do we write the wrongs that we do before our creator? right that has to be like of like Not prime primary importance because some one thing I even learned this was maybe about a Just a few months ago. This reflection really hit me that We believed in the ten commandments Right as christians. Everybody knows about the ten commandments. What's the first one? right Exactly Thou shall have no other gods before me, which we can easily translate as la la la I say wow, and don't we believe that God gives a sense of priority to things So there's a list of ten commandments. Why is that the first one? We would say There's intention behind that being the first commandment And so it made me realize even still like I said, I've been muslim for almost 28 years I'm still learning and it just hit me recently That wow like islam is reviving The primacy of the first commandment Right, and that's why a law says and advises us when we have these discussions with the people of the book Say come to a word. We share between us Which is not whether or not jesus was crucified peace be upon him The word that we share between us is that we both say There's nothing worthy worse of god We both say there's one god god is one And so That caused a shift for me personally just to focus like Okay This crucifixion thing that is an issue But that has to do with how we rectify our affair with god But there's this other thing that's even more important. Believe it or not. It's more important than that Which is the very first commandment If we can agree to that Then let's see what's Calling to that in the clearest most unambiguous manner Because once I shifted my like I said I literally became obsessed with this issue of crucifixion I wrote songs. I was in the band at that time I have songs about two songs in particular That I wrote about this issue of the crucifixion Okay As a christian and so here I am writing a song, but that's how much it like It gripped me, you know spiritually and theologically that I'm writing about it in a rock song, you know But again, I had to look at what else is around this You know what I mean? How am I forgiven and when I finally got to the verse in the quran where god talks about sacrifices and How just like fasting he's also given Right sacrificial rights To this community and also other communities, but he says it's not their meat nor their blood that reaches a law It's the piety in your heart When I read that I was I was done with that whole thing I was like, okay Even as you know having this understanding that You know as a christian we've been okay. They were always being taught. He was the sacrificial lamb He's you know that the jews used to have you know to be forgiven They had to sacrifice the lambs and animals and and then he realized it's actually There were other things they did like what if you didn't have a a lamb or a sheep? I mean you can't be forgiven. No they had other things you could use grain You're right certain types of stocks that you had stored up Why because it really in in the sight of god, it's not just Ultimately like the verse is it's not the meat or the blood or in the the case on the jewish tradition It's not the grain in the wheat that reaches a lot. It's just The sincerity of giving up sacrificing something of value For him has a sign that no i'm serious. I'm sorry. I'm gonna give up this thing You see me so for me Those types of things really helpful and at the end of the day I would just encourage Kind of shifting the emphasis to the first command because that's something as a christian Yes, we know those 10 commandments right just Consider the first one. Why is that the first the first commandment is not about salvation at all right And we have plenty of beautiful and very powerful supporting scripture about the oneness of god and Even forgiveness that's attained just by believing that and those who just say la la la The heaviest thing on the scale Right. We're forgiven even just for saying that believing it obviously in our heart and saying it forgiven And just offer that is the good news say that's our good news the gospel is the good news That's the good news at the end of the day We just can present it and so i'm just trying to share some tools to consider And your next presentation with mom You know to say a mom, you know, let's reflect on the very first command Because I think maybe we've got sidetracked with some of these other things that are important And we do that is also getting to talk about women in islam and he jab in islam and jihad in islam Start with la la la la Islam is the revival of the first commandment That's all it's it's it's unambiguous uncomplicated monotheism That it's finest that we should be proud to have that in this form So just something to consider It may a lot got all our parents, you know our siblings Our cousins and we should beg for that Ramadan, you know, I'm talking to myself, too Like did I pray for my my mom and dad last night? I didn't You know, so i'm saying this just a reminder you were reminding me of my mom My dad My three brothers and sister and my grandmother You know, we gotta pray for folks. Don't be stingy with your prayers and just Thinking about yourself and your issues and your needs You know, what about the people look at look at where we're sitting right now You know, I just was seeing part of this documentary about skid row and la and just how exacerbated The homeless situation is there in subhanallah. Look at where we are. I'm like, that's not me sitting out there like that I'm sitting here nice carpet. You know, there's food being prepared for me. I'm not even like Do I'm not even cooking the food is being prepared for me while I'm sitting on the Carpet in the air conditioned room You know in a group of like loving caring believers people modest God Alhamdulillah subhanallah I had a question What's one good thing you could do on any day in rabid on that's like one really good selfless thing that In terms of goodness outweighs like All the lesser sins you did throughout like a whole year What's one good selfless thing you could do in rabid on that's just like the the ultimate level up Like just super awesome good deed Right, is that the question? Right It's just Fast sincere just be sincere So yeah, be sincere Because if you're no matter what you're doing uh Whether it's going outside feeding a thousand people or Uh, giving your mom a foot massage Um Giving your dad a back massage men are always complaining about their backs Any of that which are great things or donating a large sum of money to the mcc which I do hope you do in this month um No matter what you do my good brother The the heart of it is sincerity If you're just focusing on doing the act itself without focusing on Why you're doing it and who you're doing it for doing it for Allah then there you go If you just focus on that Being sincere in that i'm doing i'm doing because that's what Allah says in the hadith Whoever fast the month of Ramadan sincerely He could have not said that right why did he could have just said whoever fast Ramadan? Right, but he said whoever fast sincerely All your sins will be forgiven So that that's my advice I want I want, uh I don't want to tell you things specific Other than that to do because that's the basis of whatever you decide to do, but I want you to take that uh That inspiration and be be spiritually creative And just come up with something that you feel like kind of led to do You know what I mean because we all have our kind of personal interests and leanings So you kind of tap into yourself. I'm like, you know, what's something I could do that That will feel good and then I can do sincerely Even if nobody sees it with Allah Right inshallah Is that okay? Yes, I had I had another question. Um, I've been a student of uh of islam for the past eight years Oh, but I've only been a student and in eight years Like it's enough time to like get a phd if you're in a university, but they uh, but like I have no um I've been kind of like hoarding all this knowledge unintentionally and uh, I've You acquire all this knowledge like Let I sort of lack the intention of acquiring the knowledge in the first place Which was to become a teacher of islam and have students and pass on knowledge of islam to the next generation And to my peers in my community And any like toilet that wants to uh learn about uh any like A through z when it comes to islam, but I've uh, sort of lack any um Uh, like I I rarely come across anybody who who's like, uh Like who's a toilet, you know like any sort there's there's no toilet in my life And I just feel like I'm just selflessly learning all this knowledge and and I don't have any sort of like, um foundation or environment to like Spread that knowledge in There's not a lot of people in this country that um cares about You know learning about the quran or arabic or islamic history And I just feel like uh unless I had like a phd um, I'm not Worthy of like ever calling myself A teacher which has been like uh like a a dream like a a career dream of mine Um, and it's created a lot of depression Like what do you say like to someone who's aspiring to be like a teacher, but Has to stay a student In the hopes of like obtaining a dream that you know, lakar olam may not come true So you're if I understand what what you asked, uh correctly You you have an interest to be a student of knowledge Right and you it sounds like what you're trying to do is study islam systematically Right Like not just internet islam or you know Like you would like to study islam systematically which i'm doing Okay, are you studying is it with a teacher or do you it's just through books that have been recommended or through both books and university professors and books recommended by university professors and um Uh accredited people Right, so it sounds like What it sounds like a a missing ingredient is just like a dedicated islamic studies teacher like a muslim like like that I'm I've hoarded so much knowledge. I mean, I don't I don't claim. I know everything right. I don't claim I know everything but um, I feel like why will I ever know enough to be able to like Teach what I know because there's no point in like learning right from from, you know professors and scholars and reading books if Um, you're just going to keep all that knowledge inside your head Never let it out and then like never share it with anyone and then die and then all that knowledge goes to your grave So what like this is like an existential fear of mine um, what what advice do you have like about like For like giving hope to anyone who like wants to um, uh, like spread islamic knowledge, um Through uh, just means um to like uh anyone like if a I don't know like, um Uh, this is like a like a Like a duty of mine like some people like to say doula Um, or some people would say be a university professor But like the road has been like very long And um come almost at the end of it god inshallah, but I cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel unfortunately Got it. Got it. Well, there's there's probably A lot at play with it. You know, there's a a lot of dynamics Uh Involved with a question like that Uh, number one It's it's it's it's a great question like you should be happy to even be concerned with something like that I think that's uh, you should take that as a very hopeful sign or a sign to put hope in that you even care about the religion Right seriously like you should be like take that as a good sign That you actually care about the religion Number two that you care about the religion enough that you want to learn more about it So that's the second thing you should be hopeful about Also Remember, you know, and I think that's been a theme You know that I'm seeing in in this presentation I've tried to offer is not beating yourself up and overburdening yourself Right because a law doesn't do that to us. He doesn't overburden us or be a lot of this are burdens Which things we're doing to ourselves Okay, and the prophet peace upon him told us in this regard What may be translated as convey from me even if one verse Convey from me like convey uh This knowledge that we have that's Been revealed through the prophet Muhammad peace be upon them Even if it's one verse willow aya even just one Verse so it's not a don't don't look at your pursuit Of knowledge and in particular your sharing of knowledge don't look at it as this cumulative Thing always break things back to their essentials because if you're always looking at The big things that you desire you'll miss what's been right next to you And that's why you have to work with first Your sphere of influence And identify your sphere of influence and your sphere of concern Your sphere of concern is probably the whole world Right. We care about humanity. We care about this thing happening over here and this thing happening over there But a lot of times over obsessing about our sphere of concern or our realm of concern Makes us miss our sphere of actual influence Which is our families coworkers neighbors We're so thinking about what's happening here and there and we miss The brother sitting right next to you to your left You see what I mean you forget to Give him a salam and a good greeting and smiling at his face and You see what I mean those little things And that's done out of knowledge Right, but sometimes overthinking about you know over complicating we miss these little things You know and so that's something i'm very You know particular about Is those little things and in particular out of the things to study Give some priority to the study of the character aspects of the prophet Muhammad peace be upon him A book specifically the content of character the content of character Is a book by by sheikh hamza yusuf that he translated That is one of my top favorite books personally Because it's just a translation of a compilation of just Character-centric hadith that's narrated authentically from the prophet Muhammad peace be upon them That are like so readily Like they're accessible and like doable inshallah Yeah, and so that i'm just saying that to to not um Tell you exactly what to do but also tell you a good focal point of what you're trying to do Be sincere And focus on those Essential simple thing even if it's one verse But specifically don't forget about your sphere of influence, which is those more direct people in your life And your interaction with those direct people should be The knowledge your your that that interaction should be based on is the beautiful character traits of the prophet Muhammad peace be upon him Not the do's and don'ts The dawah doesn't start the the call and the invitation of people does not start with telling them what they can't do And what they have to start doing It's reminding them that they have a creator number one Right and then to take on beautiful Propheted character traits and that there's healing and there's beauty and there's light in that And that's that's my advice for that The content of character Is both Well, it's an english book, but it has the hadith are in arabic and english So yeah, it's a pure english book, but for the hadith they do have them in arabic english I'm sorry. Did you you're here? Did you have something to say? I totally not trying to diss my man there Okay, so sorry for there. Uh, we are time it is time for makhrib Allallah Mashallah, so we went the whole time. Take beer. Allallah. Allahu Akbar May Allah bless you with our beautiful it just flew by the time Allah, so it's a very precious time right now. Please pray for your brother before you break the fast Yes for all this community play for everyone here