 Hello everyone, another NARC Survivor Live video. I'm out here tonight in the middle of the jungle. Just done quite a bit of a drive exploring. Got the new BMW 320i with this sports body kit. Can't really see it too well in the dark. I just picked it up today and I'll give it a clean and showcase it in my next video, hopefully. It's a nice car, quite fast too. But yes, and this one I'm going to be talking about something that we do not talk about too often. And that is how you are actually not as significant as you think to the narcissist. Because a lot of you are thinking, I've been with this person for a very long time. You may have been with them for 10 years and you may feel like they know you. You know them, you may feel like you had something, you had this connection. And although they did some things sometimes that you did not approve of, you felt like they cared about you, they loved you. Because they weren't always bad. I mean yes, there were a lot of arguments, there were a lot of fights. It's when it seemed like they actually cared. And I know what that's like, I've experienced it many times myself. And it makes you doubt all of the negative experiences that you had with them. It makes you feel like maybe you got it wrong, maybe you weren't dealing with a narcissist after all. But actually narcissists, a lot of them do have empathy as well. It's just that their narcissistic tendencies override it a lot of times. But then other times, if their day is going well, if they're happy, then they can treat you right, even if it's only for a short time. So it leads you to believe that you're something significant to them. The reality is that you are not. Just look back through the amount of time that you spent with them. When was the last time that you actually sat down with them and had a conversation? And I don't just mean a conversation about the weather. What about a conversation about your feelings and needs? About what is or what is not OK for you? About what matters to you? About what is important to you in life? When was the last time you had that with the narcissist? Just think about that for a moment. Because you've got to look at it like this. You found my videos because there was a problem. And you were looking for a solution to that problem. And if you look at it, the problem was you felt invalidated. You felt like they couldn't hear you. They weren't listening to you. And many of you, you watch my videos because you feel like I'm filling in that space. Like I am hearing you and validating your experience. Which is something that I can do in such a short space of time. And it's so easy for me to do it. And yet you may have been with this narcissist for 10 years. There was never a time where you sat down and had a conversation like that. Which is how you should know that you're actually not significant at all. And in fact, it could have been anyone. It could have been anyone in your place. It's just that you are the one who chose to give them the time of day. You are the one who decided to entertain their advances. You decided to give them a chance. And if it wasn't you, then it would have been someone else. I don't know, with a lot of you, you're already aware that they have or they had other sources of supply on the side. They were entertaining other people. And you may know about the Rex's. They didn't want to put up with them. The narcissist may have said that they were crazy. They did them wrong. But maybe they just didn't fall for the illusion. Maybe that's what it was. Because you're actually not that important to them at all. They don't even know who you are. They don't know your likes and interests. They don't know what makes you tick. What turns you on. No, they don't know any of that stuff. All they know is what makes them feel good. What makes them upset or angry. What they want. And unfortunately for you, what they want doesn't typically align with what you want. That's why you find you're having so many disagreements with them. So much conflict where it's like they can't even understand you. Because you're not significant to them. And you've got to think about it like this. If you are so significant to them, then why would it go from the love bombing to the devaluation? And in some cases they end up discarding you. You've been discarded already. Why would that happen? If you were so significant to them, if they cared about you. Why would they triangle it with someone else? Why would they replace you? I mean if you are very significant to someone, it's not going to be so easy for them to replace you. And in fact it might take them a long time, it might take them years. They're not just going to replace you overnight or even in a few days, a few weeks, a few months. They're not going to be able to do that so quickly and easily. Which is how you should know. And how you should be aware that no, you're not significant to them at all. But yes, there may be certain qualities and traits that you have that are significant to them. Things such as your love, your joy and positivity, your innocence and purity. All of these things that narcissists do not possess. So they've got to get that from you. They've got to strip you of your qualities and virtues. Because it fulfills them, it gives them supply when they're able to take that away from you. But that's the thing. Could it be in anyone? It didn't have to be you. They could have got that from someone else. These qualities and virtues that you possess. They got it from you because you were willing to give that to them. And honestly, if they could just strip you of that, take it away from you. They'd probably just do that and leave you. They wouldn't need you around. And it's the same thing if they can find that in someone else. It's so easy for them to replace you because you're actually not so significant to them at all. You're not important to them. And it's not just you, it's everyone. People are disposable objects to the narcissist. They're expendable. They can get rid of you without notice. Because you don't matter to them as much as you might think. They don't really value your individuality. They don't value your quirks and mannerisms, all of these things that make you. You. They don't care about your passions and interests. They don't care about you having a purpose of your own. When did they ever support you in any of that? When did they ever encourage these individual things about you? When did they ever do that? And in fact, by being with a narcissist, you may have found that you've lost yourself. They raised you at a core level. Remember all of the things you were doing before you met them? You had all of these hobbies and interests, all of these passions, these values and virtues, these things that mattered to you. What happened to all of that? Where did that all go? And that's when it should hit you. That's when you should know you should recognize that they never valued you as a person. They saw you as an object that existed to meet their needs. They saw you as an extension of them. And then it was all about just molding you into whatever they wanted you to be. Whatever would serve them. It was never about developing the person that you are. We're encouraging you to become the best version of yourself. No, it was never about that at all. It was all about what they were going to get from you, that they never actually cared about you, they never valued you as a person. They never saw you as a separate person with your own feelings and needs. And I know this may be difficult for a lot of you to hear, but I do believe that it is very important. It's something that you need to understand and it will help you to detach from them by knowing that they never actually cared about you at all. If they cared about you, they wouldn't have been able to do those things to you. They wouldn't have harmed you if they really loved you. You don't harm something that you love, but for them it was all about sabotaging and destroying you, holding you back in life. But guess what? You may not have been significant to the narcissist, but you can be significant to yourself by practicing self-love and self-care. Recognizing your value, because a lot of you are very intelligent and attractive people. You have these qualities and virtues which they did recognize. Yes, they recognize the value of that and those things belong to you. That's what drew them to you. That's what made them target you. And these things are a part of you, but they didn't see them as a part of you. It was all about stripping that away from you. As though it was something that could be detached from you, because that's just how they think. So, yes, I want to end this on a positive note by encouraging and inspiring you to develop yourself, your identity, your passions and interests, the things that matter to you. Even if those things didn't matter to them, they can matter to you. By doing that, by practicing self-love and self-care, then in time, you'll be able to attract someone who does love you for you. Someone who recognizes your value and appreciates you. Yes, you will find that for real. It all starts by loving yourself and forgiving yourself for being involved with them. Got Nala jumping around you. As I said, we are traveling, exploring the jungle. Going to have a lot more videos now in the jungle over the next few days. Got quite a long trip. Been in the city for quite a few weeks, so we decided to go exploring Nala's tale here. But yes, it's sad I know it just feels like you wasted all of your time with this person and you could have spent that time doing something else. But this is just the reality of it. You were not significant to them. You were just the one who gave them a chance. You accepted them and you tolerated the abuse. And they know a lot of other people would not have tolerated that. A lot of other people are not empaths. They wouldn't even try to understand them. They would just walk away in the very beginning. But you didn't do that. So you're a rare breed. It was difficult for them to find someone like you. But that's just it. It was never about you, it was a person. Which of course is why they dehumanized you. They crucified you. But yes, as I said, you can move on. Practice self-love. Value yourself. And you will find someone who values you. Someone who shares the same qualities and virtues as you do. Instead of someone who's only looking to strip that away because they don't have that and the envious of it. Because that's what this is about. Yes, of course, they are envious and jealous of your qualities, virtues, abilities and achievements, all of these things. The very envious and jealous of that, that's why they become so competitive. But you can take that and find someone who will appreciate you as a person. And they will recognize that these things belong to you. And they will respect your individuality instead of trying to tear it down. So yes, that's what I wanted to say tonight in this message. And I hope it was helpful for you. I'm going to continue now with my journey. Got another hour of driving through the jungle. So I'm going to enjoy that. And yeah, until next time, thank you all for watching. Please give it a thumbs up down below. Share and subscribe. And as always, I'll talk to you in another one very soon.