 Hey, Psych2Goers. Are you currently in a relationship you feel isn't working out? You may be trying your best to save what's left of the relationship and are making sure you're making the right decision. But sometimes it's better to have a good healthy separation with someone rather than staying in a dying relationship. This is why it's helpful to understand some signs that someone may not be for you. So here are a few signs. Number one, you feel like you can't be yourself around them. Which parts of yourself do you change when you're with a person? Is it a certain personality trait of yours? Your looks? Your style? Why? You may feel like this because you're afraid of them viewing you in a certain way. This is not a good sign because it means that you think that they're only attracted to a certain idea of you. If you feel like you have to alter a part of yourself just to meet another person's standards or to be of value, you might be going through a personal problem brought on by self-esteem issues. This type of behavior may be improved by talking to your partner, friends, family, or a mental health professional. Please remember that you're beautiful just the way you are and your self-worth isn't determined by the way you look. Number two, you always initiate conversations and dates. Are you always texting them first? Is it you who always reaches out to them and asks what they're doing, how their day was, or if they want to go out? Does it feel like you're the only one putting in the effort? Someone being indifferent towards your efforts can actually have a negative impact on your self-esteem. Not having open, healthy communication in your relationship may cause anxiety and self-blame. Bring this issue up with your partner to understand each other's sides of the story and find solutions. If this type of behavior doesn't change after a while, it's probably an indication that this person really isn't for you because you're worth more than a half-hearted relationship. Number three, you don't feel their trust. Do they often threaten you with breaking up if you do something they don't like? Are they the overly jealous type? Have you been forbidden to talk to specific people because your partner doesn't like them? Your partner not trusting you may be a manifestation of their own insecurity. This might stem from many possible causes like childhood upbringing or bad experiences in the past. It's encouraged to talk to them about this behavior and tell them how you feel when they try to micromanage you. You may also get help by encouraging them to talk to you. They're loved ones or a therapist. If their behavior doesn't change after a while, then it's probably best to give them some space to sort out their own problems by themselves. Number four, you fight instead of having healthy arguments. Arguments, if done right, are healthy parts of a relationship. They can promote individuality, openness and respect between partners. Through arguments, you learn more about the other person and their perspectives on different topics. This helps you view future events through their lens and understand their ways of thinking. Arguments stop being helpful when it's all about the fighting and no longer about the growth. When you notice that your fights are getting more frequent and intense involving toxic relationship traits such as the use of negative terms, physical abuse and manipulation, then it might be best to ask for outside help and intervention. Number five, you can't open up to them about anything. Your partner is your other half in your support person. It's only fitting that you feel comfortable around them enough to talk about diverse topics, both serious and light-hearted. If your partner constantly cuts you off, doesn't validate your own opinions and spends most of the time talking about themselves, they may just be looking for someone to talk to. It's best to clear out any misunderstandings in the relationship beforehand. Do they just want someone to vent to? Are they irritated when you talk about yourself? If your partner does these things out of narcissistic tendencies, then they really may not be for you. Number six, you're very defensive when asked about them. Somehow your friends often seem to know when things are going south in a relationship. This is because they care about you a lot. They tend to ask questions and observe you and your partner when you are together. Do you often feel the need to defend your partner even though no suspicious questions are being asked? It probably stems from how you perceive your partner based on their own actions. What are you defensive of? Is it their attitude? Have they done something you don't want to tell your friends? It might be a good idea to ask yourself these questions and why you don't like being asked about your partner in the first place. If there really is an issue, you might want to talk about this with your partner to address the main problems in the first place. Number seven, you're afraid to let them meet the people you're close to. Are you postponing your partner meeting your friends or family? Why do you think so? It might be because you already know they're not going to hit it off well. The people close to you know you well, sometimes even better than you know yourself. The fact that you're avoiding the inevitable meetup shows that you think there is something wrong in your own relationship. It might be a good idea to ask yourself about the reasons for this fear in the first place. Is it because of how your partner behaves? Do you think their personality clashes with the people you're close to? Have they done something your family will not approve of? It's encouraged to talk to your partner about these things for their own awareness, too. After all, not all people will get along at first, however, most of the time the people you're close to only want the best for you. So if you think they'll have a negative impression of your relationship partner, they really might be something wrong. Number eight, you're constantly on the lookout for new partners. Are you often asking yourself if they're the right person for you? Do you repetitively imagine yourself being together with other people? Asking yourself if it would be a better match. If you're always thinking about other people or looking at others during dates with your partner, it might be a sign that you're not as invested in the relationship as you think you are. Attraction to other people is normal. It's just an act of notice and good traits in others. But when you decide to act on those harmless feelings, it's where things go awry. You may feel this way due to a lack of excitement in your relationship. It might also be a method of escape from a restrictive relationship or a way of seeking comfort from others because of bad communication habits in your own relationship. Whatever the reason is, it's important to ask yourself why you're doing this in the first place. Are you unsatisfied? Does the thought of breaking up with them frequently come to your head? It's encouraged to discuss these points with your partner to come across a mutual understanding and conclusion together. Number nine, you don't feel like you're becoming a better person. Have you reached a point in the relationship where you've become stagnant? Are you no longer interested in your hobbies? Does it feel like you are not improving? Collective growth is important in a relationship. Your partner inspires you to be a better person and vice versa. However, if you both reach a standstill where you feel unmotivated by each other's presence and instead feel tired and weary, it might be better to take a step back and give space where it's needed. A lot of this is caused when the relationship becomes a routine instead of something exciting with your other half. If you're starting to feel like it's a task rather than an expression of love, then it might work to find other ways to get yourselves engaged in the relationship once again. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Sometimes breaking up with them is the breath of fresh air you might actually need. And number ten, you're staying in the relationship out of comfort. Has it become a habit to stay in the relationship just for the sake of it? Are you afraid of the thought of being alone if you break up with them? If you think the relationship has reached its end and there is no possible way for it to go anywhere else, it might be best to end it properly. It's nice to keep in mind that not all endings have to be bad. Sometimes you just have to do it and let life move on. It may help to acknowledge that you've done all that you can and that is what is important. Sometimes letting go is better than holding on to something that no longer brings you joy or growth. It's good to continuously ask yourself, are you still happy? It sucks being in a relationship with someone who you feel isn't right for you. Do you have someone like this in your life? What made you say so? Please share your experiences in the comment section below. We'd appreciate hearing about your stories. Did you find this video valuable? Tell us in the comments below. Please like it and share it with friends that might find use in this video too. Make sure to subscribe to Psych2Go and hit the notification bell for more content. All the references used are added in the description box below. Thanks so much for watching and we'll see you next time.