 Thank you everyone. Thank you for coming. So I'm going to everyone that is joining us via live. We really appreciate all of you guys coming out and listening in. My name is Tana Sabhani and I am the founder of Wasila Connections. So today we're just going to talk about a little bit about Wasila Connections, sort of my story, the journey into Wasila and how we came about and what we're doing and what our hopes are in the future of Wasila and you all. So let's get started. So here I have up our website. We are a non-profit organization. We started in 2020, right before COVID. So we were able to start right before COVID. But before I kind of go into who Wasila is or what Wasila is, I want to tell you guys about me so that you guys can go on this journey with me and I want to take you on the journey with Wasila so you can kind of get a feel and picture of how we came about to this, to today, really. So my name, you know, as I mentioned, my name is Tana Sabhani. I am a divorcee. I am a single mom of four daughters. And I am a clinical social worker. So mental health, personal experience all in one. I got divorced in 2018. And right before I had gotten divorced, you know, we subconsciously have this idea in our mind that marriage is our end all be all. That's what we were raised to be, that we grow up and get married and that's it. You have to stay married no matter what. And towards the last year of my marriage, I started having those thoughts of, like, this has to work. This has to go. I, you know, what's going to happen? Who's going to say what? What are people going to say? I couldn't break free from this ideology that I'm going to be divorced. So, you know, throughout my journey of coming to that decision, there was a lot of heartache, a lot of difficulties, a lot of shackles in my mind that I didn't think existed, you know? And I grew up here and I grew up in California. And so I was someone who didn't care what people thought, wasn't really interested in how people viewed me or what I did. But this subconsciously was inside my mind and I had no idea until it came time to actually make that decision. And so, you know, I had a friend tell me, before you make the decision, make sure, you are 200% sure that the decision that you are making is what you want. And that there isn't, that you're going to look back and regret your decision. And so I thought about it. I thought about it. And I finally came to the realization that I did what I could. I did everything I could do. Therefore, this is really the only option for me right now. And so, I decided that the divorce was best. And everything I feared about people, community, what would people say, how would it be afterwards? Didn't actually come to be in a way. It didn't go the way I thought it was going to go. Now, Alhamdulillah, Allah swt blessed me with the family that was supportive. Alhamdulillah, Allah swt blessed me with a community that was supportive. Alhamdulillah, Allah swt blessed me with friends that were supportive. And so, thus became my journey of being a divorcee and a single mom. And a South Asian, a Desi Muslim. So, as you can see, all the taboos, all in one. So then I, you know, I started, started working. I started, I started working and I started just going about my life. And as people started finding out, I got commentary like, why didn't you stay in there for the sake of your kids? Your kids have a broken home now. You know, why, why couldn't you make it work? And just comments and questions that honestly were not appropriate. But Alhamdulillah, you know, I was able to talk to people about that. And soon, a lot of other people started coming up to me and talking about their stories and their journey. You know, I had a friend who came up to me and said, they were raised by a single mother. I had many other single parents that I formed a relationship with that talked about some of the things that I necessarily didn't go through, but I understood. I had, I had friends tell me that, or the single parents say that we get shunned by the community. Everyone looks at us as where we don't belong. And they would talk about how their families were not willing to take them back. They would talk about their parents, who just didn't want anything to do with them because they were divorced or that they were deciding to leave or that they were in an abusive marriage and they just, they just, they couldn't, they couldn't continue. Yet their families turned away from them. And a lot of the things I heard at that point was that if you're going to leave your marriage, you better come as a dead person. These are hurtful comments. A lot of the women that I was talking to, some of them attempted to commit suicide. Some of them had to raise their own children without their families around or without any support. Some of their friends of these women turned their backs on them, you know, and it was heartbreaking. But how can we, how can a community that once was their friend, their, how can a family that loved them, that married them off, that honored them, just dishonored them over, over a marital status. So a lot of, I was hearing a lot of that. And a friend came up and said, you have to do something about it. At that time, I, you know, I was working and was, was, you know, working and trying to, you know, grow my career and, and figure out what, what could be best for the community at that time. And I didn't, I didn't think too much about having this, or even, or even, you know, creating an organization by and means. I then went to a, and I kept, I kept getting pushed and, you know, said, Hey, let's, let's do something. Let's do something. And I said, you know, we have so many organizations in the Bay Area. We have so much. I don't want to reinvent the wheel. And then I went to a conference. I went to a conference that in that conference, Mothik Amani was speaking. And he said something so profound that I realized that we just do not have that anymore in our community. And that was, that wherever the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam went, he created a community. What does a community mean? Not just people living side by side, not knowing what's happening, but a community, a body of people that came together and helped one another in their most difficult time of need. Where was everybody? That was a solidification in my heart that I said, okay, that's what we don't have. That's what I'm going to create, inshallah. And thus the journey of Wasila started. Now, I got together with a couple of people, and we, we talked about what is it that we can do for the Muslim community? How can we help the Muslim community? I mean, we, there's so much need in the community. You know, it's not if it's one thing, it's another thing. And it's just all these things. It's like, well, what can, what is, what's going on in our community that no one has talked about? Nobody has touched, and lo and behold, the divorce community, the divorce, the separated, the widows, all of them were not in the spotlight. So we said, that's it. That's, that's what we're going to do. We are going to focus on that. What does that look like? So when we were coming up with, with the name Wasila, we just want to, just want to talk about what the definition of Wasila means. Wasila means a means of getting close to Allah. And just I, and I want to, I want to give sort of a quick definition linguistically what, what the meaning of Wasila actually is. So Wasila was derived from the Quranic verse mentioned in sort of 5 ayah 35 where Allah swt commands us towards the fear of Allah and to seek a Wasila, to gain closeness to him and strive in the path of Allah if you wish to be successful. Wasila spelled with a scene is derived from the word Wasila, which means to make effort to become close to someone. Relationships are important at Wasila connections. And honoring the relationship that Allah swt informed us to honor is of the utmost priority in the era of abuse and oppression. Interesting enough, Wasila spelled with a slide refers to becoming close to someone in an absolute sense, whereas Wasila with the scenes means to seek gain nearness with longing and love. So in that sense, Wasila connection strives to help build, rectify, maintain healthy relationships with others so that all of these become a Wasila to, in building a relationship with our creator, our sustainer. And this commentary of Wasila was taken from Marafiq Quran and Vafiq Shah, Shafiq Ar-Rahmanullah. That, you know, what's amazing is that Wasila is also translated due to this verse as the act of seeking, you know, closeness, but we seek helping others as a means of ourselves being in closeness. And so with Wasila, we're a means we want to create more ease for those that have been forgotten or that those that have been neglected. And so that's, that's really what Wasila means. And when I heard it, I said, that's it. That's what it is. We are going to be a means of ease to those that are going through a hardship time. We are going to be that collective community that strives to build such a movement that doesn't leave anyone behind and helps them through their difficult time. And what saddens me is that, yes, the divorce and the suffering of widows are often forgotten unfortunately. Now, although our primary audience is for divorce and separated widows, it's not, it's not just divorce. It's, we want to, we want to look at this in a more holistic way. And when I say holistic, although our focal point is divorce, it goes beyond that. It goes before that where you're struggling in your marriage or you're struggling with something in your life. So the marital aspect. And then it goes even beyond before that, which is struggling before getting married. There's something happening there that you are struggling with. And then even before that individually, what are you doing as an individual? How can you support you as an individual? Because with all of these labels, married, divorced, separated, widowed, these are all labels. We are not defined by labels. Therefore, we want to move away from that definition. And then even after that post-divorce, what can we do to help support after you've gone through it? And then even after that, and it goes deeper into how can we bring the community involved in it? So just multiple layers is who we want to encompass. So that's really the essence of who we are as a Wasila, how we came about. We, you know, we have our nonprofit status. And we went ahead and did some programming over the last two and a half years. And some of the programming that I have placed up here is we've done co-parenting series. I think it's very important that when you do get divorced, those that have kids that are single moms, single dads, that you now have to take a look at your relationship not as a spouse, but as a partnership so that your children can thrive. Because children are also part of this. And you're often also neglected in this process. We've had other events such as a Ramadan event. We have ithars. We have an e-basket program for our divorce fees in separated widows and their children. We started a clinical therapy practice. We provide therapy virtually. We also have a religious consultation model where you get access to Olimah. I know sometimes it's really hard to reach out to the Olimah. And, you know, in a Masjid as well, our Olimah are trying to do their best and try to get to everybody. But we know, you know, sometimes, you know, sometimes it does get hard to get back. So we have direct access to that. We have parent consultations. We have a board certified behavior analyst on our team that provides parental consultation because oftentimes as single parents, we, our children ask those questions or our children are behaving in a certain way that really hard to navigate because we ourselves are going through an emotional turmoil that we also have to take care of our young ones as well. So really that's there to support that process too. We've had community events. We've had socials. And these socials we've, in the past we've done as socials, we've had 200 women and children come out. Because really the idea behind Wasila is to create a collective community, create a movement that you find support with one another. You, you have, you have support with each other because women, we need to, as women and men and women, everybody, we need to create a village. What does that village look like if we ourselves as women are not coming together for each other? So we have community events. We have primarily, we have primarily workshops. I also, we also do support groups for single moms and divorced women. And we also do support groups for divorced men. Yesterday, we actually, we actually had a event for the brothers who we did a brothers bonfire. And the topic was the manly man. We want to cultivate that, that definition of what does it mean to be a man through the son of a proper thought fellow? What does it mean to be a real man in this day and age? So we recently have that. And then we also have a lot of other workshops. You know, we have multiple workshops that we plan out throughout the year. And so, you know, in Ramadan, we have a worship with these campaign that we do Ramadan at stars. And one-on-one guidance support. We're going to be having that because I know a lot of the times when we're going through these situations, who do we go to? Who do we talk to? I know a lot of women tell me that it's really hard to talk to someone who hasn't gone through this. And I understand. I understand completely that when you reach out to someone, you feel like, do they really know what I feel? Do they really understand me? Can they really be there for me? That's a hard question to ask when you're meeting that someone. I know a lot of women talk to me about feeling isolated. And that's what our community events are meant to do, is to break that isolation. Is to recreate that no, you don't need to go through this by yourself. No, you don't need to face people that have this idea that they want to shun you. No, that is not us. That is not our ummah. That is not what we are supposed to be here on earth for. Our Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, gave us the perfect role model, the perfect guide to how we should be with each other. And that is what Wasila Connections aims to be, is to make sure we build those connections and we come together and maintain those connections. No matter what difficulty we are going through. So, yeah, so what we're going to do is we're going to keep questions towards the end because we want to honor this space. We are, in the last one, we are live streaming and we want to give you guys the privacy and security. So we will have Q&A at the end, inshallah, if that's okay. And those that are live streaming, those that are on our page, please ask questions so that we can definitely get to that as well. But this is essentially the heart of us right now. Again, salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu, everyone, inshallah. What an honor to have all of you here. I'm really just so moved by this beautiful space and I want to credit my dear sister Sana for all of her work, all of her efforts, all of the time that she's put into this incredible organization, which I really am looking forward to even hearing more about in her closing remarks, but really may Allah reward you, Sana, for all the work that you're doing to bring all of us here together and all of you as well. I know I've heard, masha'Allah, from some of you that you've come from as far as San Francisco, San Bruno, and I'm sure other places, and we will continue with the introductions. We will, inshallah. I'm not going to talk too long. I just wanted to, again, show support because this type of work is so necessary. For those who don't know, Alhamdulillah, I'm part of the Bay Area Community here at MCCA. I offer halafas and classes regularly. I meet with sisters all the time, and it's actually the largest demographic that I work with for over 25 years. I've facilitated halafas in the Bay Area and in Southern California, and I've always seen that this particular demographic, this group of sisters who are, have come out of a marriage and have suffered all of the inequities and the stigmas and all of the just the terrible things that we we know exist, and we are, inshallah, going to do everything in our power to overcome, but they come to those spaces, looking for healing, looking for support, looking for community, as the inshallah spoke about, but oftentimes they don't really feel like other people understand, right, their circumstances. So that's why having an organization like inshallah dedicated solely to serving the needs of the demographic and also the needs of the children, for example, and other families, family members who are also support systems for the sisters and brothers who are, who have come out of divorce, is so, so critical. So I just was so honored by the invitation to participate and really happy to have all of you here. As I mentioned, my work with women over 25 or so years ago, I began as a female organizer for some of the organizations here in the Bay area. And that kind of turned into this role in the community that I didn't, I wasn't certainly qualified for, because I was young and I didn't really have any expertise, but I think because the stigma, not just around divorce and the topic of divorce, but really mental health issues and any type of those types of issues are so common and prevalent, we didn't have the amount of now, like we do now, right, we have martial almost therapists, we have entire agencies, we have so much more now. So we've definitely built a lot of infrastructure over the 20 or so years. So back then we didn't have that. So I kind of ended up finding myself, because I was visible in the community, people could recognize me as someone who was volunteering and working, I would, you know, be approached by sisters, some I knew, some I didn't know, seeking advice, they were struggling in their marriages, they were struggling with, you know, the day to day, but also with the heavy questions, like, should I stay? How can I get out? What am I going to do? What about my children? So those types of questions, and I was, you know, in my 20s, I didn't like have a lot of life experience, but I think the the ability or the role that I was able to offer at that time was to be an empathic, you know, to just listen. And sometimes that's the best thing that we can offer, right? Is to be there, to look at someone, you know, even if we don't know every detail of their life, but to have that heart connection, which is much more what our dear sister was able to demonstrate for us, like the hearts would just immediately open, right? Which is one of the amazing, if you look at the research about women, when women come together in healing spaces like this, even without words exchanged, our oxytocin levels go up, which is the feel good hormone. All of our stress levels go down. We don't have to talk. We just sit here in silence and smile at each other, and there'll be healing. So imagine taking it to the next level, where you actually look at someone and say, I see you, you may feel invisible, right? To everyone else, you may be hidden, because as Santa knows, as all of us know, who've been down this road before, oftentimes you feel like you are hidden, right? People don't want to associate with you. They don't want to tell your story or you to tell your story. They want to silence you, right? So to come into a space where it's like you are center stage, we want to see you, we want to feel you, your needs matter to us, and we want to try to find a way where we can support you and fulfill those needs for you, whatever we can do, whatever we can. At that point though, as I said, when I was on this path of my own, I wasn't, there weren't these types of services, so I just kind of ended up having that role, and then it kind of word started spreading, and I ended up having this reputation as a counselor, although I'm not, and I always try to tell people I'm not a certified, qualified counselor, it's just, you know, a Dino Nasiha, so, you know, that's about where I started and ended up counseling, where you can just be a sister to someone or a brother. But what people didn't know is during that time of me supporting a lot of people with their relationships, not just marriage, home, life, many things, but mainly marriage, was that I myself was going through a very difficult marriage, and, you know, it was years of doing this work and kind of having a reputation, but at the same time simultaneously hiding my secrets, right, my big secret that my own home was broken, my own home was, didn't feel like a home, it was the house, didn't feel like a home, it didn't feel like a, something that I was, was proud of, or I was, you know, feeling safe. And so I kind of sought out community work as a way to cope with my own issues and my own private life. You know, it was for me doing Dawah, being, you know, in the service of the community, learning, Alhamdulillah, we had the opportunity to learn from some of the great teachers in the day. That was for me a way to cope with what I was struggling with in my own relationship. And one of the beautiful things that I will always look back at, and I'm so filled with gratitude to Allah, so final thought on what I look at that eight year period of hardship, because some of the most beautiful relationships I have with sisters came out of that. And in the last two years of my previous marriage, it was about a year and a half, two years, we did work like this, but not in this professional established way. We would just get together as sisters who were divorced or thinking about divorce or struggling in their marriage. In homes, we just get together and facilitate conversations and listen to one another. And the healing that came from those circles. I know, I remember, I had testimonies right in front of me of sisters who were struggling with suicidal ideation, who had all of these really dark thoughts, but just weekly or monthly, however often we were meeting, knowing that they could come to a place and have non-judgment. Nobody's trying to judge. Nobody needs to, nobody's, you know, expecting you to tell them anything. You share what you want, right? It's your story to tell, however way you want to tell it, if you want to tell it, but there's no presumption. There's no prejudgment, which is unfortunately the case often, right? Where people hear of the divorce and immediately rush to assume that somehow there was a failing. And who does that land on most often than not, right? The women, right? It's the woman who couldn't keep her husband happy. The woman who couldn't keep her home running, completely denying or neglecting the fact that it takes two people, SubhanAllah, to make a home. And if one is not just, you know, neglecting, but in addition to that, abusing, let's still blame the woman. It's, it's, we've got so much work to do, which is why, again, this work that Mashallah is doing is so essential. And we really, as a community, have to support it. And it starts right here. And the fact that you all came is just such an amazing, real, you know, great step towards what inshallah, I know her vision. I've had beautiful conversations with her. She's a visionary, Mashallah. And she, you know, there's people who talk. There's a lot of people who do a lot of talking. And I'm sure we know, you know, people who always have ideas, you know, like, Oh, the Masjid needs more of this. And the Muslim community doesn't have enough of this. And there's always complainers and people who are just, you know, armchair, you know, spectators or activists, whatever they call them, but they're just sitting in their comfortable homes, willing to criticize everybody. And then there's doers. There's people who actually say, you know what, there's something that's needed. And I need to get my hands into it. I'm willing to roll up my sleeves and get in there and do the work of Mashallah. That's why, again, you know, we have to support this organization because she's done so much of the legwork. I mean, have you heard? I've never heard of another organization that serves only sisters who've gone through the work and brothers, right? We have to reiterate that it's for, for all. It's not one or the other, but predominantly it's serving women and children, right? And so Mashallah, I've never heard of another organization that was established with that intention. It's a beautiful intention. And, you know, I know from the work that I do with women, this is so needed. I had people reach out from all over the world asking that this was going to be live stream because they know they don't have support groups like this in their own cities, in their own states, some in their own countries. So, Alhamdulillah, you know, we're here for that intention. We're here because we need to have these conversations openly. And this is how we destigmatize the voice. We don't need to hide it. To me, I think it's in unbelievable that we live in a time where people will stigmatize divorcees, especially, and then completely overlook the fact that the Prophet's life set him himself. He, he divorced one of his wives, you know, Haqsa, right? And he took her back. So what about when she was in that status of divorce, right? Did her position or her value change whatsoever? No, he took her back. His own daughters, right? Were divorced. And he welcomed them back with compassion. So I always, my, my kind of question about anybody who has, who somehow, you know, perpetuates this notion that a divorce, you know, kind of brings people down a notch is like, really, do you think that you are above the Messenger of Allah, you have no idea, you know, you're, it's just ignorant. A lot of it comes from culture, but it's certainly not our Dean. And the only way that we're going to be able to restore the honor that's given to all believers, regardless of their status. Because this doesn't, as Sana said, these labels don't define us. None of these labels define us. And, you know, there's so many proofs we can pull from, from the Sahabiyah. You know, there's a, she was, she's known as the, the wife of the martyrs. She married five times to Khulafa, to some of the greatest Sahaba. She was married, divorced, married, divorced. Did her estimation change in the community? No. The Khulafa were marrying her. So this is all, you know, ignorant conditioning that's come over centuries of cultural ideas being put on our community. And we as women have to undo that. And the only way we're going to do that is by telling our stories, by coming together, by not hiding behind, you know, not as long as I've been speaking in the community. I've never hid the fact that I was previously married. I have no reason to hide that. And I know unfortunately, sisters who feel kind of, you know, because they're afraid of the backlash, it's afraid of being treated a little differently. They kind of hide it. And I'm like, no, that this is contributing to the stigma. Why should we be ashamed? I am nothing to be ashamed about. Alhamdulillah wa shukrullah. It's a phase of life that some people go through and some people don't. And that's all it is. And nobody should be refined by these things. And I think the only reason why we're, we're coming together in these spaces is not to emphasize the label, but it's to say, we have been underserved in our community. And there's a lot of us that are struggling, especially those who are single and who are lightly still in court cases and, you know, challenging, I mean, having all of those legal fights still ongoing, and then not having family support, having to go into community spaces and not feel like the programs have anything to offer to them. This is not, this is no longer tolerable, right? We can't let that continue. And so that's why alhamdulillah, having an organization that's already established with the 501C3, we can start to really grow this organization and, you know, call on people to, to support it so that we can provide those services, right? So that Mashallah Sana and her team can provide those services to the community and come together in these types of healing spaces that, again, restore the honor that you already have. You have honor before Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. You have honor. You're believing women, inshallah. All of you are, are, you know, you're, you're counted amongst the group that the Prophet Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in the, from the beginning of his mission until the very last words of his last book included as being the ones deserving protection. So you have to claim that. And that's why alhamdulillah, again, I'm just really excited for the, for what's to come. You know, what, what, what the future holds. And I really want so much for all of you who are watching, for everybody who is here and who wants to, whether you're married, divorces, doesn't matter. If you recognize that this demographic has been long, this conversation is long overdue, these services are long overdue, and you recognize the importance of it, then inshallah, we call on you to, you know, to do, to support this work and to inshallah, you know, follow Wasila, you know, and look into their socials, look at the work and the programings that they're offering for everybody for the community. And let's just start having these conversations. And, you know, this was a, this was kind of like, you know, it's a meet and greet, it's like an introduction. But for those of you who are, who came from far distances, it's going to get real and a little bit more intimate once we turn all this off, right? So this is just for, you know, for everyone else to really to know about this incredible organization. I'm going to pass the mic back to Sana because, you know, there's more that she wants to share. And then inshallah, we will do those introductions. Okay, promise, we're going to do those introductions. And maybe we'll have some chai and some other people. You know, I just want to share this, you know, there are some people that you meet that when you're sitting with them, and they just, they make you feel a certain type of way. Let me just put this on. I'm not tech savvy. You know, I had the pleasure of, I'm just going to share this really quickly because I think it is, I think it's important to, so I'm going to share it really quickly, that how Alice wants to facilitate everything. I mean, I know the sister was talking about how, from where, you know, she, she, you know, was able to see us or come to this, right? I reached out to Hussai a couple of years ago when I was starting this. And, and, you know, I, you know, I wanted to reach out, I want to collaborate. I'm, you know, I'm all about this idea of let's hold hands together because we can do a lot more together than we can by ourselves. And alhamdulillah, you know, Allah's timing is the best. That was not the right time yet. So I continue to do my mission. I continue to, you know, create programs, do programs, reach out to people, talk to them. And then this year, I had the opportunity to help out another organization in an event earlier this year in February. And I saw Hussai there and I, and we got, we got to talking. And it was, it was like my first, like we had our, we were able to connect. And then I had another opportunity when we said, you know, yes, let's, let's continue connecting. But of course, as life gets busy for all of us, you know, we're like, okay, let's, let's do it. Let's do it. You know, time goes by. Then I had another opportunity with the same organization to do another event, to help out with another event. And there I was able to again connect with Osada Hussai. And then there was another event. And that, I think that event, and I don't know how that recently solidified and we're like, we need to sit down and talk. And subhanallah, as I was sitting and talking with her, just her story moved me, her, her mission moved me. And just what she's doing, what she's done, just, just everything about her just moved me. And I just said, alhamdulillah, this was the perfect timing. This was the timing that we need to meet. So, you know, never, never underestimate a less month, less timing. We're creatures of impatience that we, we want things to happen right now. You know, this, this pain has to go away right now. This, this solution has to come right now. But if everything came right now with a, with a, you know, a snap of a finger, how would we experience? How will we grow? How will we understand and break our own shackles? And, you know, subhanallah, I, I appreciate us all coming and, and supporting this and, you know, inshallah, many more of you to come and support our work. So I just want to really quickly talk about how can you, as an individual, how can you as a community be a part of this collective movement that Wasila is attempting to create with the help of Allah and for the sake of Allah? You know, one, one aspect is the thought process, destigmatization. There is so much stigma around this. The tragedy is that recently, I don't know if many of you know, but as the death of Sister Sanya rocked the community, you know, yes, it was a murder. But the tragedy around it is that she had no support. It was the stigma. It was the labels. It was all of that that led her to be in isolation. She documented it and how many more women and men, how many, how many more women are going through this day in, day out that you do not hear about it. You are not going to hear about it because they're not, they're not on social media. They're not documenting it. They're not doing it. They're suffering silently. And that's why this event is called Breaking Bread and Stigma are Forgotten Sisters because there are so many out there that are continued to be forgotten. There are so many out there that are not on the limelight and don't ever come out in the limelight. So how can we know? How can we, well, what can we do with those hidden sisters? And this is what we're trying to do. We're trying to break that and bring them out because what she went through is not just only her that she went through it. A lot of women go through this every day and day and out. I have many women that have come to me. I started a, when we first started Wasila, we did a some in-person support group out here in the Bay Area. You know how many women showed up? 30 women showed up. I myself was shocked. I, I expected 10 or 12. I said, you know, Shala, maybe there's more, but that many women and many more were sharing their stories of abuse, of domestic violence, of emotional abuse, many, many reasons. And even some that just didn't compatibility right. And it's okay. It's okay. We all rushed to blame somebody as I was talking about. We blame, we want to blame someone. We want to hold someone accountable, but that's not getting us anywhere. That's just, yes, it's fueling the fire, but what is, what's happening after some week, the fire dies down. Everyone has now moved on because there's a new, there's a new problem out in the community now. There's a new issue out in the community. And that's fine. I don't know. There's lots of issues happening, but we again are leaving our sisters behind. They're again forgotten. And that's not what our aim is. It's not what our mission is. Our mission is to continue to bring it on the limelight and continue to remind people that this is not just an event. This is just not just a moment of, of tragedy or what have you. It is a continuous issue and a continuous problem until we do something about it. You know, the stigma just doesn't, you know, we, we, we often, we often say that, okay, there's this cultural taboo and there's this societal stigma. But as I mentioned earlier in my, my story, I subconsciously had that stigma upon myself. Although nobody around me was saying it, nobody around showed me that, but I somehow had that in my mind because that's just how we were training. We grow up with certain ideas. My parents didn't train us that way, but that's just what it was because society has an impact on it. What we see has an impact on it. And so when we ourselves, like Osalastair said that when we label ourselves, we are also part of that problem. We are also contributing to that stigma because we are accepting of that label, accepting that that is what is holding us down, and that is what's continuing. No, we need to break that within ourselves as well. So really, our mission is to de-stigmatize this. And it starts with ourselves. Osalastair says that he doesn't change the condition of, of the people until they change the condition of themselves. So what does that mean? We start with ourselves, and then we move to our families, our mothers, our brothers, our sisters, or, you know, our cousins or nieces, everybody in the family unit because I love made a family unit to be sacred. And that bond is so sacred, you know, you hear blood is thicker than water. It's meant to be thicker than water because we hold such a significance. So when you, when we start to change our family's mindset, and we start to encourage our family to do better, think better, be better, who do the family members go out to then they then go out and become the community. And that ripple effect is what we want to happen in the community, what needs to happen in the community. It no longer can be me, myself, and I, it's no, it's never designed to be me, myself, and I, it's designed to be with every single individual collectively coming together and creating that movement, which was the, and as I mentioned, changing that internal definition and that dialogue within ourselves. I know a lot of women feel isolated, tired. You know, recently we did a, we did a drop in session and a lot of the, the the feelings that were coming up with it, they're tired. They're tired. Exhausted, yes. Very much exhausted. You just do this by yourself. And then fearing that the community consistently asked them questions. When are we going to have the prophetic model and understand that what their business is is not in your business? Stop asking what, why, where, who, and start asking yourself, how can I help? Start being the Wasila for them, not, not for them to feel even more drained so that they don't come out anymore. Each of us are responsible for that. Our actions is what drives people. Our actions is what brings either people closer to our dean or further away from our dean. Our character is what brings people together and what brings people apart. You know, as I was saying, you mentioned a lot of, you know, there's a lot of ignorance going on. I was just thinking about this, this term, ignorance is a bliss. How many of you guys have heard this, right? This is just being drilled in all of us. You want to say ignorance is a bliss? You know, I'd rather not know. But will ignorance be a bliss if your actions caused harm to someone's heart? Will ignorance be a bliss if your words caused the heart of a believer that is close to Allah? And will ignorance be a bliss when you get to the day of judgment and know that that ignorance that you held is the reason why some of your deeds would go? Will ignorance be a bliss then? Absolutely not. Ignorance is a bliss, is a misconception in our society that, that halts us from moving forward, halts us from growing. We are not an umma that needs to stay stagnant. We need to move forward. The idea of progressiveness, you know, the term gets used for a different reason. But we ourselves need to continue to progress and elevate ourselves and change these mindsets within ourselves and within everybody else. And so, ignorance is not a bliss. And I tell our community members, it's not, it's time to learn, reeducate yourself. What our Dean says, we're not going away from our Dean or everything that we do is all embedded into our Dean. We just have forgotten about it and we have mixed our cultural and our societal definitions into that. So, then comes to my next point of creating a village. We can create it, yes, but it takes strength to continue it. It takes strength to further it. And so, my ask for the community members and even for us as that are divorced or single moms or what have you or married or whatever label you have yourself as is to create that village, create that system that will continue to move forward. We cannot create something and leave it. We have to strengthen the foundation of it. And that means that we continue to hold hands with each other and continue that movement together. You know, even if it means that just one person is holding your hand, that's it. That's all it needs to take. It just takes one person to do that. And then that change continues. One of the other models of Wasila is that, you know, we take it from Immanuel Vazali's teacher that when he had a school, he went around and asking all of the students, what do you want to be a selfie for? What do you want to be a jurist? But why are you here learning? And forgive me if the story is long or it's just something that I've heard. And I, that everyone wanted it for, you know, for a worldly gain and why they wanted to become an Imam. And the teacher felt that why am I doing this school? There's nothing but until he came across Immanuel Vazali as he was a student. And Immanuel Vazali said, I'm doing this for the sake of Allah. And the teacher said, that's it. Just one. All I need to do is have one person. And look at, look at the Isha'a, the Medina all came from Immanuel Vazali. Everyone is, you know, knows them. Just one. So really that's our motto. Even if one person, you know, I was just telling this out there, even if one or two people showed up today, that's enough. Because those two people then go out in the world and then multiply and continue and create. So some of the action items that we, you know, want to request everyone to do is that we, we have a lot of programs. We have a lot of things that we have going on. And we want to make it known as one, we have surveys out that really bring out your opinion. Because each one of us have a different story. My story is different from your story. Your story is different from her story. Your story is different from her story. So I can't sit there and say, I know it all. I don't, I don't know all of it. So you have to help me know that. You have to help me create these programs that are going to be beneficial. I don't want to create them just to create them. If it's not going to be beneficial, then, then it's not worth it. So we have surveys out that, that take your information and all are anonymous. None of your information is going to go out anywhere. We value the idea of trust in Imanah. So please take those surveys and tell us what your concerns are. Tell us what you need. And, you know, and show us what it is because that's what we take and that's what we, you know, continue with. So I'm going to have, you know, in this next slide, I'm going to put up some QR codes, which will be easier for you to access. The other thing is sign up. Sign up to be a Wasila, either for yourself or for others, but be a part of our movement. Be a part of what we are doing because this all requires all of your help. So sign up and whether you, you know, whether you want to be, you know, want to stay connected or whether you want to know other programs or, you know, we're constantly creating, constantly doing more. So sign up and get connected with us. So our last part of our name is with Wasila Connection. We want to maintain the connections with all of you. And then there's a program called Gems of Wasila. I haven't officially announced it. This is my first time that I'm going to announce that our team, Wasila, beautifully created this. We want to hear your story because how will anyone know what is actually happening if we don't create a voice? We want to create that platform for everybody to have the opportunity to share their story, whatever struggle you went through, or maybe whatever helped you. What helped you get through that struggle? Because we're all looking for something. We're all looking for some sort of help. So maybe perhaps your story will help another individual. Maybe you talking about your story will help you. You know, and I'll go through some of my own personal, personal things that have helped me throughout my time. But we want to hear you. We want to hear your voice. So please do, you know, sign up for that and share what your stories are. We want to create that. And lastly, not, I will say this, I'm not here to ask for money, but an organization can't continue without some sort of funding for all the viewers that are watching us. I encourage you really if, and I tell this to my team all the time, I can get 500 people to just do $10 a month. You know how much that can go. It can go a long way. Just $10 a month. Be a member. Be a member of Asila indeed, the reason for an ease for another believer. Allah swt will help those that help others. You have a front row seat ticket to Allah swt. When you help another person in need, Allah will take care of all of your needs. Just imagine if your $10 a month does exactly that, that brings a breath of ease to somebody. Imagine going on the day of judgment and Allah swt telling you, go to Jannah and you're wondering, oh, what? Like I had, I, what, why are you are you serious? Or, you know, I guess because that one action of yours that you thought might have been very small but was so great in the eyes of Allah. So inshallah, I asked that everybody look, you know, check us out. Hear all the QR codes for everything that I've talked about. We have our email. That's put up there. Please reach out to us. If you have questions, concerns, just want to talk to somebody. Come talk to us. That's what we're here for. We're here to hear you guys. So please, you know, and if you know anyone who needs this service or who wants to talk to someone or just is going through a difficult time, let them know that we're here. We're here to help. We're here to stay and we're here to continue this. Lastly, I'm just going to end. I just want to share a couple of things that, you know, a lot of, a lot of women have come up to me and said this, right? We're in this era of social media. People are posting pictures showing their amazing life. MashaAllah. May Allah protect everybody. I mean, but let's just say it. That's not the reality. Every individual is going through something. Sometimes our heart, we look at another, maybe a couple or maybe we look at someone else that's having a great time and you're like, I wish I could just be like that. That's contributing to a lot more of the stress and the depression that a lot of us are going through. And unless, you know, the Prophet's saying, don't look at someone who's above you. Look at someone who's below you because that's what gives you a little bit more strength. Not someone that is, that is above you. I just, I just want to share. You may see me as, you know, someone, someone once told me like, you got it. You, you know, you got this. You're just out there. You're doing this. You're, you've made it. I haven't made it until I get to do that, guys. Let me just say this. I haven't made it yet. But it's just an appearance. Just like all of you, I have nights where I cry. I have nights where I'm tired. I have days when I am depressed as well. And we're hearing that from a, you know, clinical social worker that's like, what? You go through the questions, you know, all therapists, you're a therapist. But these are emotions that are natural. They're normal. They're not, no one's immune from these emotions. There are days where I just feel helpless sometimes that I myself also feel like, when is there an end in sight? When is there support? Months and months can go by. It's very debilitating, you know? And while everyone can see, I'm smiling. I'm doing this. I'm going here. I'm talking here. Yes. But I'm not immune from these struggles either. So some things that have helped me and I just want to share, you know, one of those things that have really, really helped support me throughout my journey is I was, when I was married, I came across this, this lecture by, I'm not sure what his last name is, but he was speaking at the RIS conference in Toronto years ago. And this was for the youth. I found it very beneficial for me. And he talked about how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, the year that he had just lost Khalid Jaladi ala Farah, the year that he's lost his uncle. And then he was at Sa'if and he was getting pelted with rocks and bloody. His last name was bloody. And in some marriages, they say that he also saw Aslam, didn't receive a fee for six months. But the pain that he, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, was going through was too heavy. And then the ayah comes up. We know the condition of your heart. Allah swt is telling the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. We know the condition of your heart. Just let's think about that for a second. You and I can share a common story, a common emotion, but really the depth or the intricacies that you're going through, can I actually know that? No. Can you know that about mine? No. We're individuals. And the individual pain that we go through is very, very unique to us. But Allah is saying that we know that He knows the condition of each of your hearts. Let's also know the condition of this mic, if I knock it over. He knows the condition of your heart. Who better than your Creator to know it? Who better? And then He, Allah swt says, remember me. Why does Allah ask us to remember Him? You know, Ashef of ours was talking about this, where there was, in ala malru, the world of souls before we came to light here, Allah swt manifested Himself as best as He saw fit. And we as souls connected to Allah. So Allah is asking us again to our souls, remember that connection, remember me. That's why it says that when you start zikr, you're remembering Allah. The heart is unrested because our heart is our soul. Your soul is rested. So then Allah swt goes on to say, be like the people of sajda. He could have said, go make wudhu, pray, surka, put your hijab on. Yes, He could have said that. But He just said, be like the people of sajda because when we are in such extreme pain, we are just crying inside, screaming inside with this unbearable pain. We just need to drop our head down because our Creator is the closest to us than our jugular vein. And there's no veil between you and Him when you are in this most broken state. He is the most closest you at that time. Can you imagine just what's one of those, the attention of Allah is on you? You don't even have to say anything and Allah knows exactly what you need. Can anyone do that for us? Can anyone really know what we need at that moment? So this particular thing has helped me where I've tried and tested. And lastly, I don't want to take too much of your time, but there's been two instances that I can share that there was a moment where I felt that I was lost. I felt like I had no control over the situation. It felt like I was just tearing apart. And I remember I sat away in my parents' garage and I was crying. I was in the middle of the night. I learned the art of silently crying. And I just 15 minutes put my head down on the ground and just cried my heart out. And all I was able to say was Allah just hugged me. Because that's all that was coming out of my heart. Allah please love me. Allah please comfort me. 15 minutes I cried and cried. And then 15 minutes later my brother comes downstairs in the garage, turns on the light. I don't even know I was there. Looks at me, calls my mom and says, go give her a hug. Nobody heard me. Allah heard me. Allah hear you. Allah knows what you didn't even know I needed a hug from my mom. Very anti-hug. Very anti-affectionate. And the fact that she came and gave me a hug, that was just the clear sign that Allah was listening to me. And he provided contentment in my heart at that moment. The very next day provided a solution. All I had to do was just trust, just let go and believe that Allah is listening to me and Allah will soothe my heart. Nobody else can. There was another moment where I, someone had said something to me that was very hurtful. I took that as, okay, there's a lesson in here. Maybe I need to change up a little bit. I needed to hear this. And I said, Allah, whatever this is, please guide me to it. But at the end of the day, I was still hurt. Because how that was delivered to me was very, very hurtful for me. But I knew I needed to change. So I said, Allah, that's okay. But I didn't know what I needed. I cried all night because I was in pain by myself. He said, Allah, I don't know what I need, but I don't know what to do. You know I need to change. I know I need to do this, but I don't know what to do. The very next morning, this individual comes up to me and gives me a hug and says, I am so sorry that I said those things to you. I thought of you all night. I was over there in the thick of night crying and asking Allah, I don't know what I need, all night. And this individual love put in their hearts to think of me that night and to come to me in the morning and say, I'm sorry, here I am for you. Allah not only gave me an apology from, I wasn't even expecting it. I didn't think, I didn't even need it, or I felt I didn't need it. And turned that individual as a source of wasila for me. That's the power of Allah. That's the power of trusting that you have a creator that loves a 70 times more than our mother. So this is what continues for me and I wanted to share that gem. So whatever situation you're in, whatever feeling you're in, sit with it. Talk to Allah. Talk to somebody because Allah will provide that wasila for you. He will provide that wasila for you and inshallah we can also be that wasila for you. This is Akalo, I don't know. Inshallah, we'll take questions if anybody has questions. I know we have quite a few people on live as well. If you have questions, you can I don't have access to. I have no idea if you guys are watching on YouTube, if you do, join our live on YouTube. We have someone monitoring the questions. Inshallah, please submit your questions. We're not going to share your names and we'll try to answer them as best as possible if we want to allow those that are here to also ask questions. So I'm just going to rephrase the question for everybody. So just essentially I think what you were asking was that although I had the family, I had the support, there's many people that do not have that and I recognize that and I understand that. How can we at wasila recreate that for the sisters or the brothers to come together and have that and meet the needs that are still, yes, how to recreate the family structure and unit. So I'll just share a couple of things. I've been divorced for four years. I am still divorced. I'm not remarried. I think that's the next challenge and that actually not the next challenge, but that is a very serious challenge or that is a big issue because in the community what we're seeing is the stigma continues that brothers are not considering women that have been previously divorced. There are some brothers that are not even looking at the women who have children who are single moms. There's also the family unit where the stigma continues where the mothers of the sons are also not okay with that. There's the families that are not okay with that and then we have the issue of do we have men out there that are men that are going to take, you know, that are going to stand up and take the stance. I'm just going to share a couple of thoughts on it. Number one, that's what we're doing. We're changing the mindset. We're trying to change the mindset of every individual to stop looking at our sisters that are single mothers that are divorced as something that is a bad thing. To stop feeling like you're less than the one that hasn't been married before. And it's hard. It is hard. I'll share a story. I'll share the story on my platform. I tend to share these stories a bit of my own journey and struggle with that is that, you know, we also have mothers who, there was a brother who I considered and his own mother was a single mom who got remarried. She had two children, but she was not accepting of me because I had two more children than she did. So that stigma and that hypocrisy exist not only in the men, but also in the mothers and the women. So that's why we tackle both ends of it. We tackle the women as well. And we tackle the men as well. We recently just had an event yesterday. Yeah. So we are starting. So that is one of our goals is to start this trajectory teaching our men or inviting our men to have these real, raw conversations of what does it mean to be a man the way the Prophet ﷺ was and the way he saw us and taught us. As we know, everyone likes to, everybody likes to say, Oh, the Prophet ﷺ, you know, married Khadija de la Hanna. Everyone talks about how the Prophet ﷺ had multiple wives. You know, there's yes, that's yes, which which which is which is a which is a problem as well. But what I think at the end of it, right, as we continue to change them, the the definitions in everybody's minds, inshallah, that we continue to talk about and continue to inject in our communities and our families on how to actually think about these things and how to actually bring those lessons into our lives and implementing those lessons into our lives. I will say that there are men out there that do marry divorced women that do marry single mothers that I have come across many of them as well, that there are brothers who have stood against not against but stood their feet down and said this is my decision and that I will that I will marry this. Yes. Yes. Yes. So, so in that in that regard, Wasila is going to continue to have these programs to continue talking about these things, co-parenting, you know, blended families, how to navigate those challenges because those challenges are there with blended families as well. You're now, you're now divide, you're now bringing together two, two families with children, and it's becoming, you know, a bigger family unit, how to navigate those challenges. So, Inchela, in the future we are, we are actively working on things where we can provide that support to both individuals to really, you know, work on that. But I think, Sister Asana, yeah, I think you might have some. Yeah, and it's such a good question because I think, you know, as Marshal Asana has already elucidated that the aim of this organization is a very multi-factorial, like there's a lot of different, you know, aspects to what she, you know, the vision is for this organization. But I think the biggest thing that we can do now, the starting point, is the unlearning, right, which is what the destigmatization is. It's unlearning. We have to teach our, our communities from our men to our women, our leadership. Every aspect of our community just needs to unlearn whatever conditioning they've been conditioned to think about this word divorce and relearn the prophetic way. And until we do that, we're going to keep, you know, hitting these barriers. So I think that's why these types of conversations are so important. Honest conversations about openly sharing, openly talking about divorce. There's no shame. There's no stigma. I don't walk with your head high. What do you have to walk into a room and feel as though, oh, someone's judging me. Don't let them judge you. You know, show that you have Issa because Allah has created you with that. And he's the one that you are, you know, upheld by. You don't need to look and, and to other people's, you know, opinions of you and then determine yourself worth from that. So it's on us as women to hold our heads a certain way and walk with that honor. And it's also on organizations like Wasila and other teachers or people in the community who can start to reframe these conversations. So we call on the leadership. We call on the brothers and the sisters who are in these positions to start to talk about this topic of marriage and divorce. And especially, I think we need to start talking about them together, because sometimes the conversations are separated, right? So there's a lot of conversations around premarital, right, preparation around marriage, family. And then as an afterthought, maybe once in a blue moon, you see something that has to do with divorce. And I think that's a real, this just it's wrong. It's all part of, you know, the experience of life. And just like when you study fiqh, for example, you have to study, you know, the fiqh of these things, right? Why can't we bring this more mature, educated, you know, a lens or approach to these topics instead of fearing them or thinking like, oh, if we talk about them, we're endorsing them. That's just insane to me, right? No, if we're talking and teaching, for example, young couples about divorce, the fiqh of divorce, how the Quran calls on men to marry and divorce. And the way that it should be done doesn't mean we're pushing people to divorce. But this is sometimes the, you know, the ignorant way that people even receive that. So the idea here is that, no, we have to just talk about relationships, what healthy relationships are, what unhealthy relationships are, so that we can learn to recognize, right, and teach our young men and women to recognize patterns, to avoid patterns, to fear God. I mean, these are the kinds of conversations we have to be having. So I think a lot of what you're asking is very valid. And inshallah, we're working towards that goal. But for those of you who are, you know, who may not know, if you are looking for opportunities to meet other people, right? Because sometimes, you know, you may be in that place, right? There's everybody's journey is different. So if you're in a place where like, okay, I'm ready to meet someone for the sake of marriage and maybe talk for the next chapter of my life, there will be an event here, I think in two weeks, right? Yeah, August 13th with half our Dean. It's I think it's still should be open in terms of registration. But you know, we've got to sometimes take those leaps of faith and make ourselves vulnerable. You know, like I said, you have to come out and own, you know, who you are and put yourself into those situations where you could find, you know, those opportunities and talk about a lot. At the end of the day, talk about a lot. So there are those efforts happening. And inshallah, you know, it's working. Yeah, you know, it's it's it's a it's a work in progress and slowly step by step. So just alcohol and fear question. I appreciate it. Yeah, we are, we are definitely working on we're revamping our website, inshallah. And so we'll have it a little bit more accessible as we continue. But you brought up a really good point where and I just wanted to highlight that each one of us holds a specific trait. We have a specific expertise within us. And that's what we need. We need people to come forward and and do what you're best out, do what you're good at, do what you love. And here at wasila, we do create those platforms for that. You know, I get people asking me that, can I do this? Can I do that? And I want to be that organization that allows, you know, gives that space. So, you know, inshallah, please do connect with us. I think, I think we'll we'll definitely have some space for that too. But that's that's that's what it that's what it takes, right? That's what it takes to create a village. You come exactly, you connect, you connect with like minded individuals. You have a passion. And here's a platform to continue that passion. So inshallah, please definitely do connect with me. Yeah, so there's I hear a couple of different questions. One I hear, is there any legal help or legal support on how to navigate the legal needs of what's your what's your rights and what you you know what's there. The second question I think I hear is that how how to navigate, you know, informing the kids and how to work through that. Yeah, step by step. So to let me answer the last one, we do have co parenting series, which which although it says co parenting, we have multiple people just come normally not not the co parent, you know, we like both the parents to come so both parents can hear the information. And we go through that. We talk about how to navigate some of those things. How do we talk to children in different age levels? You know what what you can say? Yes, so so that we don't have yet as we we need trained professional. I think one of the things that I that I am very staunch on is that I don't want any just anyone coming and talking about that I want the trained professionals that are knowledgeable and that I'm in the ABA field. So I understand. Yeah, so I understand what you're saying. We have a BCBA on, you know, there that can actually provide us a person. We do have that service for the BCBA. So you can definitely check us out on the website. We have a link for that. Yes, it's on our it's there's a there's a portion on our website that says mental health. And in that, there's our clinical therapy. There's a parent consultation. And there's also therapy, a religious consultation on there. So if you can't click on the link, I have the email up, it's admin at wassila connect or please email us if you want a session for that, we can definitely book you in for that session. Now going back to the legal or smiling because we've we've had this conversation over years. And I know how difficult it is to navigate the legal system here. It's it's very difficult. And thousands and thousands of dollars do go. I do want to share one resource we just, we just got Michelle, haven't launched it yet, but I'm going to share it with you guys, is that we now have a resource specifically for our Muslims, where you can navigate doing the form. So if you were going through a divorce, we have a certain form that you need to fill out in the court system. And you cannot, you know, you don't have the resources to go to a lawyer. We now have the system called legal FINA. It was, yeah, so I, if you email us, we can share the resource with you. It's specifically, you know, it's, it's to help support, you know, individuals who want to navigate that system, kind of like a, kind of like a, yeah, like a, like a, what's the word, robot, like a automated system that kind of guides you each step of the way to help support you in like what, what aspect it is. And there's customer service on there to help, help you navigate some of those legal terminology and, and what have you. So that is there. So if you need that, or if you know someone who would like to check that it is still a work in progress, it's, it's created by a family, a brother who, who really, you know, wanted to provide the community with that service. So Michelle, you know, they had been working on it for years, and they finally just launched, and there's still a work in progress. But please email us if you'd like to have that. And we can, we can talk more about that. As far as lawyers go, you know, it is, it is difficult to find. And it family law just in itself is very, very like it does, there's no like, you know, it sounds, sounds kind of depressing to say, but there's no end to sometimes these family law cases, right? So you don't know how long a particular case is going to go. You don't know how short it's going to go. You don't know how long maybe there's different complications that do come up. So it's really hard because a lot of these lawyers are very much like just slammed with, with these cases. I mean, we have top notch lawyers that are amazing, but they can't take anyone on because there's a lot of these cases. And so we are attempting to work on finding resources for lawyers. We unfortunately cannot, at this time, do not have a list of that. But we go beyond just Muslim lawyers. I think, you know, Cesar Hussai and I were talking about this, that we don't need to specifically look for a Muslim lawyer. You, yeah. So, so there are a lot of other lawyers out there. So we are, you know, we are still working on that resource to just have, and I know Hussar Hussai has, you know, maybe might have some research too. We're all sort of coming together and trying to create those resources. And in shallow, once we have them, we will definitely put them out on our network. But if you individually, you know, have a specific question about that, you can definitely reach out to us. And as a social worker, my job in itself is to find resources. So whatever I have, whatever knowledge I have, I can, I can share that information with you too. So sorry, I know I didn't answer your question. So, so interpretation, I see, yeah. So challenges on understanding how to navigate that process. It is, it is very difficult. I, you know, I will agree with that. I myself went through that process. It's hard to understand the, you know, the legalities and yes, we did have, we actually had a workshop that we had it about a, about maybe about a year and a half ago, to just kind of talk about some of those terms. I will see what we'll, you know, we'll, in shallow, we'll take that feedback. Yeah, we'll take that feedback. And, you know, in shallow, we'll reconsider, you know, talk about it. The sticky situation is that everybody's situation is different. And, you know, there isn't just a one answer to solve everyone's or a general generic thing that we that lawyers can share. But I know there are some lawyers that provide free consultations. And those consultations are, are helpful. So, inshallah, if any of you, or if you know people who, who want some of those resources, inshallah, we can try to help support that. But, yeah. Yeah, and that's what, that's what we seek to, to, to solve, right? It's guidance, guidance on what to do, where to go, resources. We actually have something in the works. I mean, it's, it's there, we haven't completely launched it, but it, but I'll just share it. We have an intake form that, that you can fill out and request that you have certain needs, and you're looking for certain services. And that's what the surveys are for actually to gather the information of how many people are in need of the specific service, like for example, legal help, financial help, job skills, training, housing resource. So that's what we're right now, we're in that stage of collecting that information so that we can actively make those skillset and that, that, that specific resource for it. Yeah, so we, we, you know, we are the service right now, that's what, that's the phase that we're in right now is that we're taking that data right now. And then inshallah, we actually, you know, we actually talked about this, me and Asala Hussai talked about how each of us are in a different phase of life, even with the divorce, you know, some of us need emotional support, some of us need hands-on job training, some of us need educational grants, some of us need, you know, legal help, financial help. So there's different, different areas that we can touch. And that's what we are currently creating, inshallah, where we can provide that support and services. So we do have, we do have that form, inshallah, we will post that up. If you, you know, if you connect with us and be on our newsletter, we do send out some of those information. And so inshallah, please keep a lookout. Soon we'll have that, have that up. But for the mean, in the meantime, if everyone is looking for some, some sort of help, please email us at admin at wassilaconnect.org. And, you know, ask us and that, you know, that way we can individually see what your needs are. And we have a lot of organizations that have, have those resources too. So, you know, we're, we're looking to not reinvent the wheel, but also, you know, collaborate with these other organizations to provide the support. So I have in the past, you know, someone has come to me for an housing issue or a rent issue, I will connect them with another organization and MCC Mashallah is a beautiful organization that really helps support, support these matters too. So I can definitely connect you with, with some of those resources too and where to look for them too. Jazakaloka and the question was, what are the resources and support for our youth and our younger, our children as a single parent? So this is something that, you know, we, we definitely recognize that, you know, me having my four as well, I constantly think about what, what can I provide for my own children? So we are, you know, working on, that's where our community aspect comes in, where we do community programs, where we do socials, you know, we will have more programs and events and activities really to, to connect our youth back into our community. And that's really, you know, a lot of the massages and a lot of the organizations are actively working on this as well, where they're, you know, looking, we're creating programs for the youth to join. That way, they are, they're, you know, finding, you know, some, some sort of support because us adults, we can sit through this lecture, we can, or we can sit through a support group and a talk therapy, we can sit through all this, but our kids cannot. And that's not something our kids want, right? So we have to think on their levels where what does a 14 year old like to do, you know, for guys, maybe, you know, play basketball, you know, go to the beach, go to the movies, whatever is your child's like, we're trying to create those type of programs and those community programs. So that is something that we are actively working on. Please stay tuned. There is going to be something happening soon with that. So, but we do hear you in terms of like what other support systems are there, you know, there's a great organization, they do a lot of youth events to is called El MISPA. I know they're pretty far there in Sacramento, but they do a lot of programs for youth as well. MCC actually had a lot of youth programs as well. I know because of COVID, a lot of those things have stopped, but I know they are reemerging with with those. So please connect with this massage it as well, get on their mailing list and see what other programs they have for you. There's a lot. I know there's a new community called the Centerville Islamic Center in Fremont that they also are providing. They do, they do soccer camps, they do basketball camps, they do, you know, I think there's another, there's, I just recently came across a flyer in the Fremont area where there's the wrestling club. So there's, there's a lot of, a lot of programs coming up now for the youth, but it's part of the issue is that getting that word out there and seeing that. So, you know, if you, if you have questions about that or ideas about that, please email us, you know, we are connected in different communities that we can give you that resource and send you these flyers and send you these, this information of that. So, you know, there's a guy, I think there's arts and craft for girls coming up or there's like a, you know, a kickboxing. I know there's like a kickboxing class. So there are lots of programs out there, but in Shella, with Waseela specifically, we are actively looking at that. You know, we have a lot of work to do. We have a lot, a lot of ways to do, but we are actively considering that in Shella in the future. We should be able to provide more programming for that. No, just like I'll get into all of you, I just wanted to reiterate, I think, Mashallah, from having heard directly from Cent over the course of many conversations, the vision that she and her team have, there are so many, all of these concerns about, you know, legal, as we mentioned, aid, financial aid, you know, providing resources for childcare, especially for single families, all of these things are on her radar. It's all there. It's just a matter of getting the support from the community and obviously hearing from you. So that's why I wanted to just really do another push about the importance of these surveys and the data that she's collecting, because when we, when she can analyze that, you know, the majority of the, you know, submissions were highlighting this particular area, or maybe a percentage was, then she can know how to distribute those resources, how to allocate funds, how to do grant, you know, because she's also looking at grants. So Mashallah, they're really actively trying to meet the needs of your needs, but we need to hear from you. And we also need to have more and more sisters join. So if you know sisters who couldn't make it today, please encourage them to, you know, follow these, all take all these QR codes, share it with them, and let them know that data is really going to, you know, make the difference here. The more information she can get, the more she can hear from what your specific needs and wants are, the more her and her team can really assess, come together, you know, and assess, you know, how to do that. But if we don't know, and then we're just kind of trying to, you know, put things together based on our observations, it may not, you know, it may take much longer, right? So you'll actually help the process, you'll facilitate the process tremendously. If you participate, get involved, start joining, get the word out, follow the socials. Make sure, I'm so like right now in this mindset of, this organization has to be at the top, like if you do this search for like divorce and Islam, you know, or, you know, Waseel would come up, come up at the top of those search results, right? That it's that recognized as a national, you know, community, I mean, organization, leading the conversation on divorce and how to help people navigate all of the different aspects of it. But in order to get there, we need more and more people involved in it. So really important to do that. Yeah, I'll say this, a lot of the things that you guys have asked, we've been having these conversations for three years, you know, three years, we've been continuing having and some of these things that you guys have asked, it's already created. And I, I have them backlogged, I have them tabled, because I need, I need support. You know, I haven't, I haven't said this openly and I'm saying this today, you know, my team also tells me they're like, you can't just, you can't just stay quiet, you got to go out there and get to talk to people, you have to, you have to present this stuff. My motto with Wasila was, I'm not going to go out there and ask first, I'm going to do the work first. I want to show everybody that we're doing the work. And we're in year two, two and a half years, and this is all the work we've done and much more. And there's so many things that, you know, my, I have that I unfortunately cannot launch it because I don't have the manpower for it nor do I have the funding for it. And as, you know, as idealistic, I'd like it to be in a perfect world that I have all the funding, all the manpower to do this, I don't. So it's going to take every individual out there in the community to really support us. And I think we are now at that prime where we realize that this is, this is just going on and up and up. And, you know, I used to not have so much love for research, but I see why research is really important. And our team has, Mashala, you know, we have a wonderful social media team, we have a wonderful, you know, we have a lot of, we have some interns as well. So if you have people that would love to volunteer with us, please, you know, connect with us on that. If you have expertise in a certain area, bring them forward, because that's what we need because together we can do much more bigger changes. I can't do it by myself. I just, for the viewers who are listening, one of our dear sisters here made a really beautiful, profound point that I just wanted to, if I won't do it as justice as you did, but Mashala paraphrase it, is that, you know, many of us in our own struggle sometimes we forget the fact that when we turn our focus to Khidmah, to service, to serving, you know, Allah Almighty is serving His creation that we actually will lighten our own burdens as opposed to just becoming insular, focusing on ourselves, which is what Shaitan usually, that's one of his tactics, right? Isolate, make you completely wallow in your own self, you know, as they say, misery loves company. So he'll just be right there, you know, to drown you in your sorrows and have you stuck either in the past, right? Which is what oftentimes people say is what depression is, right? You're stuck in the past or anxious about the future and you forget the now, right? But we're called to be people of Tawakar Allah, we don't despair, right? Despairs haram in Islam. We have hope. We don't let the thoughts of darkness and hopelessness ever overcome us because Allah is hope. So, and then we see that there's also this law of reciprocity, right? When, as Allah Almighty says, when you are grateful for the abundance of blessings, I will increase you. And how do we show that gratitude, right? By using the blessings that He's given us, the faculties that He's given us, the skills that He's given us for good, right? Paying it forward. That is actual gratitude. Gratitude isn't just saying Alhamdulillah, everybody can say that on their tongue, right? It's actual action. It's an actionable thing. So when you, as Mashallah's sister said, you know, all of us have, should have a stake in supporting this organization because to be honest, and for those who are watching too, if you're married, if you're a brother, if you are, you know, feeling like this is maybe you, you tuned in, I don't know, by choice or accidentally, but you're thinking, well, this only applies to sisters who are divorced. That thinking we want you to not do. This is not about, you know, this is the community. This is a, this is a, everybody in the community has to have participate in supporting this organization, right? It's not just only a certain group, right? Because as Sana has mentioned, there's a ripple effect. If we want our community to be whole, right? Then we have to come together and provide those services, come together as a community, support one another and be whole together. Not everybody go into their little, you know, groups and forget about each other. And this is the danger of the modern world, right? Everybody's just stuck in their own labels and identity politics. And, you know, it doesn't apply to me. I'm not interested. This is not our Dean. The, our Dean is, as the hadith says, we're an Oma, we're like one body, if one part of the body hurts, the entire body hurts. So when you see, as I'm, we mentioned a specific group being underserved for far too long, neglected for far too long, oppressed for far too long, that is why we all have to step up and undo the harm that has been caused. And that requires everybody, every individual to participate. So I'm sorry, you had a question. Yes. Yes, ignorance. Yeah. Yeah. No, I that that is, that is a real, that is a real issue where we have had multiple women and men to have said that their friends dropped them overnight. And they no longer include them. So really, we have to look at ourselves and those that are married out there, those that are, you know, that you aren't married or single, you know, I've never been married, like, don't, don't turn away. I mean, if there's no such thing as, you know, your friend is divorced, that was the, you know, that the juju will come on you, you know, or that, that, that, that, that, that saw about or something is going to come on you. Yeah. Exactly. And I just want to reiterate to everyone that's watching, one of the, one of the feelings that, you know, you as friends, when you turn away from your divorced friends, you make them feel like they're not worth it. You, you know, as I was saying, it's a betrayal. It is, it's, it's like, what were you friends for in the beginning? You know, what was your, where was your heart? Where was your intention? You know, and we are to be together and, you know, together and work together and, you know, and continue to help one another, but you're just little action of slowly moving away from them because they no longer share a status is very, very harmful. It's ignorant and it is not from the Dean. It is absolutely not from the Dean. You know, I look at each individual, one of you women, and you might have seen me walk around and would you have guessed anything? No, you would look at me as a person. So really, I think, you know, those that are married, that those that are in the community, think about your actions, think about what you're doing that is causing and contributing to the entire stigma of this and contributing to the feelings that have hurt in another believer's heart. I think they, they just honestly reveal their own ignorance, unfortunately. And like you said, for people like that, good riddance, if they, you know, don't understand the very basics of decency and, you know, showing kindness and compassion, then, you know, you don't need to, you know, waste your time on that. And Allah sometimes removes people from you for that reason. Yeah. And this is what we were speaking about is the unlearning. It's very painful. It's very painful. But Alhamdulillah for, you know, creating new, newer, better networks. And that's what this is about. You know, we don't need to, we can just close the door on all that negativity and move forward. You know, some, you know, you know, as a final thought, I'll share that, you know, as Hussada Hussai was saying that there, Allah SWT will reveal who is beneficial for you, who is not good for you. You know, as I spoke about in the beginning where I had all these attachments, these attachments to certain people, and I didn't want to let go of those attachments. And I had people telling me, let them go, let them go. They're not worth it. I just couldn't let them go. But Allah will show you the true colors of each individual in your life. Because sometimes we either learn by advice or we learn by falling. So really, sometimes a lot of us, you know, I learned by painful situations of how these people that I was so attached to that I respected that I loved all slowly turned away from me. And I said, today I say good riddance because Alhamdulillah Allah SWT is still watching out for me. And not only that, when Allah SWT takes something away from you, he will replace it with something even much better. So if he is taking people away from you, Alhamdulillah, you will have someone in just much better than they were, better, better people than they were. And you won't even think about them anymore. They won't even occupy that space in your mind that they didn't deserve to be occupied in. And that's what we have to look forward to. That Allah, you've taken this person away. Alhamdulillah, replace it with something so much more better. Yes, don't let them live rent free. Yes. Yes, we allow a lot of things to live rent free in our mind. So Alhamdulillah, I think we, you know, we are at 330. I, you know, what we're going to do, Inshallah, is just wrap up, wrap up our online live feed. There's there's snacks, there's shy and everything we want to appreciate. Everyone who is who has logged on, has watched any of our portions there. Please, if you have questions, concerns, please don't hesitate to reach out to us. We have Instagram, we have Facebook, we have our socials. If you haven't gotten it, please, you know, look, look us up. We're out there email us. So some of the services we have really quickly is that I have a monthly support group for divorced women and single moms. They happen the first Saturday of every month. And we, if you get on our website, we'll be able to give you not website, if you email us, we'll be able to give you a link. That link, if anyone who has watched us has ever had our previous link, that has changed. So please do email us if you don't have our new link. So we have monthly, we are consistently having programs every month. So I'll just give you a highlight really quickly. This tomorrow's August, the time is flying. We have, we have a co-parenting workshop coming up in July, August 21st. Please do, you know, please do register once that comes out. We will also, you know, for the brothers that are watching, we're also going to have another Manly's Man series in July coming up. So please do keep, keep in tune for that. We have, we have, we have a couple other workshops and program. We also have an EED gift program that we did. Right now it's closed. We've, we are not, we're serving this EED. We are serving 50, I believe 52 children and 25 adults. So, you know, if you, you know, those that are watching, we are still, we are still in need of about 600 to cover up the cost for that. If you'd like to donate, please do donate on that, but we are making gift baskets for our divorce or separated and our widows and their children. So we've, I just got all those boxes in my home. So I'm excited. I'm going to be, we're going to be making those baskets. So this is going to be an annual thing because EED is such a blessed time and we want to be able to provide some, some sort of love, you know, from some physical form of love and giving gift. So that is, that is there as well. Each Ramadan, we have Iftars and, and I, and we will have in-person socials coming up more and I will start, we'll start releasing some of those things. So those are some of our current programs happening. Please again, reach out to us and give us more feedback on what you'd like to see more of. So Jazak al-Al-Qaeda for everyone that's been watching us, appreciate it. Please keep us in your do'az. I'm so sorry if you want to. Jazak al-Qaeda, again, everyone, in the honor of being in your company, hearing your beautiful stories, opening your heart to us. I hope, inshallah, this is the first of many more events with all of you and more, inshallah, as we continue to grow. With that said, inshallah,