 without a bounce with Jamie and Abby. Today, we have a special guest with us, Ms. Clark Byrd. She is the wife of our very own Kevin Byrd, and she's gonna be joining us for our holiday edition of our podcast. Yes, we're so excited to have her. And before we talk all things holiday and get you in the mood for Christmas or whatever you celebrate, we are gonna get to know Clark a little bit better. So let's just start from the beginning. Where are you from? I am from Decatur, Georgia. So I have a little bit of a strange history around that. I lived with my grandparents my whole life and my mom and my granddad was in the army. So I was actually born on the army base in Louisiana. Oh, wow. Fort Polk, Fort Polk, the army base. What port, where's Fort Polk? I have no idea. Somewhere. I know it's in Louisiana. I know that. Derrida or like somewhere in that kind of area, I would assume. They live there for quite a bit. So my mom brought me down there and had me at that hospital there. Then we moved to Denver. So I was about three. And then we moved to Decatur, Georgia. And then we moved to Boston and then we came back to Georgia. But I've been in Georgia the longest. So that's where Kevin and I met in high school in Atlanta. Oh, what grade? 10th. Oh, wow. Did you start dating or were you from? Yeah, we started dating in 10th grade. So did you break up between like, then or you just stay together through college? Yeah, we've been together the whole time. That's so sweet. That's awesome. We've been together the whole time. Wow. So how long have y'all been married now? Three years. I knew it was soon because I remember those pictures. Oh yeah. They were stunning. Thank you. We had a great time. Our whole family came. It was amazing. But you'd been dating how long before he proposed? Wow. Probably about 10. Yeah, probably eight years. Wow. Yeah. That's great. So you were really there through his whole career, like high school, college, yeah, so I've seen, yeah, I've seen his whole career from the beginning. So has my family. So they're always excited when they come up. It's hard for them not to pass a billboard with him wanting to not start crying. They cry at everything. They see him on the stadium. They're like, oh my gosh, give me a hand. That's so sweet. Somebody with his jersey on. They're like, oh my God. I know him. They cry at a drop of a hat. But we, yeah, we watched the whole thing. We actually went to two separate colleges. So I would fly back to Tennessee and then go back to school. Where did you go? I went to Howard University in Washington, D.C. Oh wow. What did you major in? Pre-law. Are you kidding me? No, I completely opposite. Right now I'm trying to become a doula so that I obviously not use a modifier. Oh wow. Yeah, but yeah. And you guys have two children, correct? Okay, what are their ages and names? So my daughter is the oldest. Her name is Eliana Rose Byert. She's named after her middle names after my grandmother, Rosemary. And she's two. She just turned two, August 22nd. And my son, Kevin Byert IV, he is one. He turned one, August 23rd. Oh my gosh. And they're a year apart now. That's crazy. They are a year apart. He was born at home by accident the day after my daughter's COVID birthday party at our house. Tell us about that because I remember the phone call like Kevin calling John and I woke up and I'm like, what's going on? Clark is having her baby? He's like, Jamie and Kevin just delivered the baby. I'm like, oh my gosh. Just tell us about that. It was full on Lifetime Movie Special. It was insane. We had the little birthday party for my daughter the night before because of COVID. Thank God. That's the only reason why Kevin was at home because this was training camp. Yes. So this happened the year before. I would have just been at home by myself. So thank God for that. I don't know what I would have been up a creek. And I must thank God that he didn't pass out. He went into full game day mode like, come on, turn around like that. OK, I got it. Yeah, he's been under pressure. I'll say that. Wait, so did you just wake up with contractions and kind of like? Yeah, my water didn't break. I didn't have any of the pre, all the things that they tell you and all of that movie. I thought it was going to be like you're in a wheelchair. You get rushed in the hospital and you have a baby. But obviously not. I didn't have any of the pre. Did you have it with your daughter though? So I was induced with my daughter. Oh, OK. So my doctor called me and was like, hey, we're having a baby today. And I'm like, OK, we came in and that was another thing. I had to call Kevin at the facility and get him out of the training camp then the same time the year before and have him leave the facility for that and come for that. But so I'd had never had labor, like active labor before because when you're induced, they give you the right. You know, so I was I had the epidural before anything started. So I was kind of just chilling out with my daughter. I can do this. Yeah, I'm like, yeah, let's have seven more. Like, I don't I don't feel a thing. Well, yeah, definitely not the next time. Did they say why would happen? And no, there's no explanation on why your water didn't break. And well, they the run in theory right now is that my kids are so close together that he just kind of had a good way out. But they're like, well, I he probably just knew what he was doing. He you know, she paved the way. But yeah, he he just came out and I don't even think it was 45 minutes. But to not feel like that's kind of nice. And then all of a sudden. Well, I mean, like the first part. Well, yeah. Yeah. And then I'm sure you were like, give me to the hospital. I'm a girl. We had gone to sleep. We had gone to sleep and we were like, well, the baby's not coming today. You know, I have my backpack. I'm a type A person. I have my possible backpack for like two months. I had a list. I had a binder with my birth plan. I had a room therapy candle. She's mean. That's happy. I had a full plan. So that definitely was the complete opposite of what I was thinking. But we had gone to sleep. Kevin goes Kevin's a granddaddy. He was he goes to sleep like nine thirty ten o'clock every night. Anyway, he was knocked out. So I'm like, go to the bathroom and I'm like, oh, I think I'm in labor. But by the time I realized that I couldn't walk. So I'm like, just crawling like trying to get out the bathroom. And I'm like, he's he's just snoring. I'm like, you've got to be kidding me. I'm like, Kevin, he's like, this is like a real life situation. Like, I kind of need you to wake up. So I'm like, throwing conditioner under my vanity because that's all I could like read. I'm like, and he wakes up. He's like, are you OK? I'm like, no. I'm having a baby. And he believed me. Well, he thought that like, oh, it's just painful. Like, you can make it. We only live like 10 minutes away from the hospital. So like, we can make it. We can make it like put your pants on. Like, it's not happening. It's not happening. So the doula, he called our doula and she had on her way, but she lives in Murphy's, bro. So she was like, trying to get there. And she was like, well, look down there. So he goes, oh, I hear him go, oh, my God, I see the head. Oh, my God. It was that quick, that quick. So he had no choice. Yeah, that's insane. But the baby was saying good. Thank God, no complications. I mean, he came out healthy with seven pounds. Yeah, by the time the ambulance got there, we were just sitting there hanging out and they came. How big is he now? He's a big boy. He is huge. He's a big boy. He's huge. Eliana's about 26 pounds. I want to say he's 23 and a half. So they're the same size. He always thinks they're twins. Oh, I bet they do. They're the exact same size. How are they together? Great. She's a little mommy now. She has to get him to where he's going and checks on him. He was crying earlier just because he was tired. She came over and was patting him on the back. It's OK, buddy. Do you guys want more kids, do you think? Or you don't know yet? You know what? I don't know. I don't think so. We're kind of like in a good groove with the two. And we like to travel. And then with games, everything that's going on, it's like, yeah, it's like a ready to go starter set. So I don't know. They're kind of getting in a little groove. I'm really loving it. So I don't know. We'll see. Yeah, but you guys are so young, too, right? You have time to figure it out. Don't use to always say, he's like, we have two. That's man to man. Well, I don't want to go in zone coverage. I don't know how to tell Kevin that. Because I think that's exactly how Kevin describes the situation. Yeah, exactly what he says. And he also says we're going to end up with three girls. Oh, if we have three girls, that's three weddings. Oh, that's true. I don't want to do three weddings. That's true. That's true. That's very true. And if there anything like me and how I like parties and. Can we talk about your party? You just recently had a party. Yeah. Oh, my birthday party a little while ago. Yeah, that was insane. Oh, thank you. It was beautiful. Well, we usually do like a brunch. So we usually do like a charitable moment to where we go volunteer. Since COVID, a lot of places aren't bringing in volunteers. The last year we did it before COVID, once at the So Farms to volunteer and then we had a brunch the next day. This year, so many of the girls that have participated last year are around the country now. So everybody had flown back in for it. So I'm like, well, I can't have people get babysitters. I'm like, do all the things and then we go and like sit, you know, and have a little dinner somewhere. Like, we got to do it big, if y'all are going to leave your families. And so we actually had a brunch at my house in the morning. We did goat yoga. So they brought little goats out and they jumped on us. And they did like hoses and the whole thing. The girls flipped out. Well, we had a great time until they started like waterfall pooping on my back. But we had a great time. And then we went to the 1230 Club and they have like a little room up there that has like a little terrace on the side of it. So we got to sit in there and have dinner together and go to the balcony and take pictures and just kind of talk with everybody. And then we went to Elastin's soda shop and we kind of close it down and we got chandeliers brought in, your pictures. It was gorgeous. They let you do that. They let you rent it out. That's how did you hear about that? Well, I didn't. I kind of just caught around and see who would like deal with my craziness. Maybe you should be a party planner. Well, I have a really good one that I work with. His name is Josiah. He does the 9th and Everett as his company. And he is like, just tell me whatever and I will figure it out. He's amazing. So I come up with the most insane things. And I'm like, is that too? He's like, no, we can do it. We can do it. Nothing is too much for Clark. So he brought in an R&B band and so they played on the stage and they passed around banana splits and we had cake and we had all the things. We had a great time. I loved it. I will say I love seeing all the pictures of all the ladies and all the ladies that were here before that I got to meet at the same time I met you. I love seeing all that. It was nice. It was a little reunion to come back together. A lot of them are retired now too. So it was really fun to all be in the same city again because unless we do something event-wise it probably won't happen again like that. So it was really special. Isn't it amazing? Because that's the way I look at with us being with, well, this is our third team. There's just, it's football family wherever you go and my kids have football cousins. And you know, it's just, I love seeing everybody throughout the year and I don't know. Is that what you usually hang out with? Are there all like other wives and stuff here like on a day-to-day basis or? It depends. It's kind of a mix. I have like neighbors and people that I've met throughout like just living in Nashville that I hang out quite a bit. But the girls here are so sweet. It's hard not to want to just be up under them all the time. I don't know if we just have like a really good set, like a really good team here or what. So, but the girls are amazing. Who? Mallory. Oh yeah, she's a sweetheart. Yeah, when Kevin and I first moved to Nashville, we actually lived next door to her and Kyle. And we've been friends ever since. And so that was before both of us had kids and now we both have two kids. Yeah, and your kids are similar ages. I can see other similar in age, yeah. Oh, that's fun. That's so fun. Yeah, she's a sweetheart. So what is, I'm like so curious cause I know not saying about the NFL really. Like what's your year look like? Like is Kevin gone a certain amount? Like I just don't know anything about it. Well, our year in Jamie Kent probably attached to this too. It's a little bipolar, so. I love that. It's like cut and dried. Now in the season, it's, you know, we're focused. We're in a routine. We're like, okay, Dad is gonna have to go do this. So we're getting everything together. It's very, it's very scheduled. And in the off season, it's like, oh, we're just happy to like be all together. Like let's just go lay out on the porch and have a picnic. And it's just very relaxed and go by the flow. And so it's just completely different depending on what time of the year it is. But we love it. That's hard though. Are you, do you just kind of buckle down with your kids and go like, okay, I'm gonna hang out with friends, I'm gonna have family in to help out? Yeah. I think in the beginning it's hard cause you just get kind of get adjusted. Sometimes at a 10, you're like moving to a place where you don't know anybody. Right. Which is, I think it's another reason why a lot of girls kind of like stick to each other because you probably don't know anybody else there unless you lived there for a while. But I try not to complain. We did an event with the Boys and Girls Club a few years ago and there was an officer there and he was helping us out with the kids and handing out gifts and everything. And his wife came up to me and she said, it's so hard for your husband to be gone all the time and this and that and that. And I couldn't believe she said that to me. Cause I'm like, your husband is a police officer. You know? And I'm like, I've never. So ever since then I'm like, I'm never complaining a day in my life cause she has to think is he coming home. Yeah. You know? So it's hard. That's a good attitude. But it's not terrible. You know? Yeah. Yeah. I look at it sometimes as it's almost like being a normie wife. But again, like what you just schedule-wise but what you just pointed out, our husbands are coming home. And, but that's the way I put it. I'm like, oh, we don't have it as bad. You know, their schedules are really tough. The schedule was tough. It's a tough schedule, but you know what? It's just, it is what it is. We're blessed. So we just shot it, you know? You guys share the love though, right? Cause I was reading about like your contribution to DCS and stuff here in Nashville, which I just thought was so heartwarming. Oh, thank you. Can you tell us about it? Yeah. So we have a foundation, Kevin and I. It's called the Bired Family Legacy Fund and we're really big on second chances. Like I said, my granddad was in the military. He was actually a chaplain in the military and the army. So I always grew up being that house where people, he did marriage counseling. He did all the things outside of our house. So I was just always around that kind of atmosphere. And so I always had just, always looking for ways to help people because he was such a helper, such a servant to the Lord. And so I always try to find ways to help. And then Kevin has just really been a go-getter his whole life, everything he's done, everything he's ever had to do. He really granced and to get there. But that hasn't been by himself. There's so many people that have reached out and helped him and like seen something in him and gave him a chance. And so we really have just censored our foundation around God's grace because we feel like that's just a common theme in both of our lives. Like there's nothing that we have done on our own. Like it's been somebody that said, hey, can you, you know, I can help you with this or I can do this. And it just has carried us throughout. So we try to like insert that in people's lives a little bit where we can. And so we did the renovation of the foster care center for child services here in Davidson County. It's the only center in Davidson County. So they touch every child that's going into the foster care system. I want to say it's about 700 kids in the foster care system right now. And so they take them there until they can find placement. Usually you'll try to do that 24 hours. So we renovated that space. So we wanted the kids, since everyone of them come in there to feel warm and happy because usually these are emergency types of situations. And it just broke my heart. I couldn't imagine, you know, being taken out. Regardless of the situation was bad or not, you're still taken out of what was familiar to you to a whole nother facility with strangers and like, you know, it's just uncomfortable. And we're not going to fix that. We can't fix foster care, but we're hoping just to like warm it up a little bit, make it a little brighter, make them feel a little bit more comfortable when they walk in. Well, we didn't go there for that. Initially Kevin was speaking for their graduation ceremony for the kids. And so we had to meet there to go over everything. And the woman was so passionate about everything that they do there. She was telling us everything. And I'm like, how can we help like in the next couple of months? Because I don't know what else we can do. And that's what we came up with. That's great. So we're excited about it. You were supposed to be there at that time. God brought you there to see that. And the confirmation was one of the plumbers that came during their renovation brought a kid with him to help him out. The kid had been in foster care. And he said, I remember coming in here as a child, me and my four siblings, and it did not look like this. He said, he almost cried. He was like this. And I said, okay, this is right. We're supposed to be there. It's just been amazing to just see people's faces light up. I've loved watching y'all. Because whenever Kevin was drafted, y'all literally started with the ground running, with your foundation. And he's always been in front with the media and with just helping with the community. And it's been amazing to watch both of y'all do that. Thank you so much. It's been amazing to be able to do it. It's a blessing just to see people's faces and see, just a little hope. We can't fix everything. But just hope people feel like, okay, there's somebody else that cares about me. That's really all we want to do. So do you pick different organizations each year? How do you, how does the fun work? So we have programming that we do every year that's just constant. That's annual. We have our Thanksgiving program. We have a Christmas program. And then we have our football camp that we do every year. So we pick different organizations each year. So we can try to spread that around. But we also have a grant program called the Grace Grant. And people can apply to that through our website. So we do it with two organizations a year and two individual families or individual people. And they can just write in and tell their story. And we just pick from there. There's no requirements for the Grace Grant other than you need a little help. That's really it. So we just try to pick from that. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah. Good for y'all. That's amazing. Thank you so much. How can people get involved with it? Can they donate on your site or anything? Yeah, so we have a donation button on our site. And then we also have a contact form. And people can just submit their information that way. Because we do such different events throughout the year, it really just depends on what event we're doing and how much help we need. So we kind of just refer back to that. Or people can sign up for the newsletter on our website. And that way they can see what they do and don't want to participate in. And they can just pick from there. Wow. Yeah, that's amazing. So you have, and I'm picturing two kids, this huge foundation. Please tell me you have somebody that helps you with the foundation. Yeah, so we have a grant writer. OK. And he is amazing. He helps us get grants to really be able to do all these things. He helps us reach out to organizations. We've been so blessed. Walmart, United Way. We have very big sponsors that are always willing Crosspoint that help us pull off a lot of big things. I love Crosspoint. They are amazing. They are amazing. They sure are. Yeah, so he and I really work together to try to get everything done. I love it. I remember seeing y'all. Was it during COVID? Y'all were on Crosspoint. Oh, yes. We did a Christmas giveaway at the stadium, actually. That's what it was. We turned the stadium into a Santa's workshop. And these families from the Dream Center had written their Christmas wish list, all the kids and all the adults. And we just told them, like, whatever you think, they didn't know what was going on. And we just went shopping. Lauren Tannehill and Ryan Tannehill helped us out with that, too. And so Lauren and I went to Walmart and we shopped everything on these wish lists. I mean, laptops and Xbox games and all the things that the kids wanted. And some of them were so sweet. They're like, well, we just want a bed set. Oh, my God. And they just said, you know, like those kind of things. I'm like, you're getting that. But you're getting some fun stuff, too. Great. Walmart let us go crazy. They were standing there with shopping carts helping us push around. And then Lauren and I just packed our cars up to the top. We had a great time. But then all the kids came into the Nissan Stadium and we had it all set out like a store. And then they started realizing, oh, this is what I asked for. And yeah, it was awesome. Did it have their names on it? No, they thought that they were just going to pick from like donation types of things. But then they started realizing like, oh, no, this is what was on my list. And yeah, it was amazing. And then they had like Crosspoint had people to wrap everything because some people didn't bring their kids so they could surprise their kids with the stuff on Christmas. So we did it like that, too. That's awesome. It was so fun. Are y'all doing that every year? Or was it just a? I think we might. I think we might. I think we might. We had such an awesome time seeing their faces. And it was amazing. Well, tell us, whenever y'all started dating, did he think about NFL? Did y'all think that this is where your life would lead? When did you realize? I didn't. I didn't. I mean, Kevin has always had a goal to be the best in whatever he can be. And obviously his sights were set on the NFL side. He always saw that. In my mind, I won't say I didn't think that he can make it there, but I wasn't thinking of myself in that same situation. We were so young. I honestly didn't think that far down the road. I'm like, I'm going to college. I'll see you later. So I didn't think that far down. I was thinking just separate. So I always knew that he would be great at whatever he did. And I knew that he could make it to the NFL. And it felt very hard to get into. So we're just like, we'll see what can happen. But whatever he puts his mind to, he's going to go get it. Was that like something from his childhood or instilled in him for a reason? Well, actually, Kevin did. I don't think he started playing football until high school. Really? I hear that so much. Yeah. A lot of players that don't play until later on. He played outside for fun, but on any type of organized sports. Like he didn't do any of the little league kind of stuff. And he didn't do any of that. He got serious like organized in high school. Wow. And he wasn't a safety either. He played like quarterback in high school. He played offense and defense when we were in high school. Like he literally didn't leave the field. He played the whole game, offense and defense. I want to say he played wide receiver and quarterback. Is that because he was that good or was that because it was a small school? Probably both. Probably both. Actually, I danced in high school as I was standing in the stands and we would dance in the stands. And that's how I started watching football because I had to. I had to look at the field from the stands. But yeah, he played the whole game and he was playing quarterback. And then I don't think he switched to safety until college. So with me, I still flub up football all the time. Yeah. Because he's never with me to watch it. So I never really had anybody to say, OK, this is what's going on. And this is why you have this penalty. In fact, Taylor knows about it way more than what I do. I'm not kidding. And it's so cute to watch Bailey because she's starting to understand it too. And she's asking more questions about it. And so when when did you do you get like that? Or do you you're strict football mode? You know it all. I know defense more than I know anything else because that's when he's on. It's like, oh, I know him. I know what he has to do. So I know that very well. The only thing that still is kind of confusing me is the whole kickoff situation and the punt team and those kind of things. I'm still confused. I know Brett is amazing. And that's about the extent of the whole thing that I know. So I'm still I'm working on that. That's what I'm working on. We were we were we were kicking off. And I was like, I asked Taylor, I said, why isn't Brett out there kicking and she's like, Mom, he doesn't kick right now. And I'm like, what do you mean? Yeah, she's like, mom, it's OK. It's OK. I mean, like this really just happened recently. I'm still working on that. What I do know is whenever Brett's out there, I'm excited because I know whatever he does, he does it very well and it's very good for the team. But that's about the extent. So I'm I'm learning that part. Do you do you and Kevin like talk football or does he kind of come home and turn it off like John does? I know Kevin is a football. Kevin is Liv's breeze and dies. He's going to watch the game. And that's what I don't understand, because for me, if I'm doing something all day, I want to come home and like not look at it for a little bit. He's coming home and he's watching the next game and then a game after that. And he has his film pad and he's watching film and watching somebody just playing and I'm like, how are how are you doing? You're like, you want to eat dinner? Yeah, like do you want to turn to like Sweet Home Alabama? Or watch something else? John does. Well, he'll watch his film and all that, but he like doesn't talk about it. Yeah, like, I know nothing about anything. Yeah. And but I think it was Sunday and he was on there watching the game, you know, that we just won. Yeah. And I do not do not stop. No, this is why I read so much. Yeah, yeah. This is why we read so much. Exactly. Clarkson, the reader as well. Yeah, he actually watches the game as soon as he gets home from the game. He pulls out his pad and he sits down and he watches the whole game over and everything he did and like what he can do better. And wow, as soon as he gets home and now my daughter is noticing it, so she'll go sit in. So cute. She'll go sit on his lap and she goes, Daddy, and she looks at the little thing so they watch film together. Oh, my gosh. Do they like going to the games? Oh, they love it. Yeah. I don't love it as much, but they love it. I bet, I bet. They love it. Well, it's right in the middle of nap time. So you're playing Russian roulette. There's going to be a really good day or a dirty, like a ticking time bomb. Yeah. Like they're going to spaz out in any given second because they're tired and hungry and all the things. But they need a nursery at the stadium. Is that in the neighborhood? Well, they have one. Oh, do they? I think after COVID we had to take a break from it. For the ones. Oh, they're good. Yeah, they do. Which we didn't, did we? And I just didn't choose. I think we had one in the Patriots, I think. And I just, I just had someone that came. It was easier for me and I get to tailgate a little longer. Yeah. That's fun. That's not what I should do, bring somebody else to help out. I'm not thinking about that. For sure. Yeah. Yeah. You said you're a dancer. Tell us about that because, you know, my Taylor's a dancer. So I love to dance. I actually started dancing in church. My aunt was the dance director at the church that she had gone to in Atlanta. So she had me started to dance like three or four years old and we would do praise dancing. But then I love that so much that I went starting on to a studio. And so I danced from that point all the way up until my freshman year at college. And then I said, OK, I probably should actually study. So I stopped then. But that's how Kevin and I met. I was dancing for our football team at our high school. And we always, you know, they have, we had practice around the same time. And then we ended up just seeing each other and from there. Look at that cute little girl. Yeah. That new student. Exactly. Well, he was new. He came. So he has, he's not from Atlanta. His family is from Philadelphia. Oh, wow. Yeah. So he moved to our town about ninth grade, I think. So I didn't meet him until that next year. He was there. So he was fairly new himself. Why did they move? Just for. I want to say for, like, just better opportunities. I think the school he had gone to before, I don't even think they had a football team or something like that. Oh, wow. Yeah. So she, I guess he was good and they were like, we're going to go when his mom had a friend that had lived in Atlanta and she loved it a lot. And she was like, hey, girl, come down here. Nice. They moved him and his six brothers and sisters and they moved down. Six? Yeah. Oh my gosh. We have a huge family. Heaven is the second oldest of the siblings that grew up in his home. Wow. OK. So he's very good with children. Even when I was pregnant, there are things that I didn't even know about pregnancy. He was like, you didn't know that. And I'm like, no, all my siblings are very young. So I was gone to college and out the house before. I've never lived with a baby until I had them. He, on the other hand, is like, OK, you do this. And you put this here and I said, OK, that's nice. He has a down pack. Yeah, he has a down pack. So I'm learning. How young is the youngest? She is in ninth grade, I believe, 14. Oh, wow. Yeah. Wow. So yeah. So she's a sweetheart. I've known her since she was about four, I want to say. She will come sit in between Kevin and I. She's like, excuse me, this is my brother. OK. You're doing a little too much. So did you dance at Howard? My first year, I did. We had a homecoming dance team. Homecoming is very big. At my school, the whole city just has to shut down and they have a whole long weekend of activities and concerts and all the things. And so the dorms actually would have a step show and a dance show and a competition. And so you had to try out for the dance teams and all the different things. So I danced on my dorm's homecoming team. OK, nice. And then after that, you're like, nope, I got to study. Yeah. So they have a dance team at Howard. Actually, that's similar to what I did in high school. But the scheduling is just so crazy. And I was actually paying my way through school while I was in school, so I was working. Oh, gosh. Yeah, it was just not. It's a lot. That's a lot. I didn't even go see your honey. That too. That too. So I was a little bit like that. I was a little bit like that. I can't be dancing every weekend. Yes, exactly. So I'm like, if y'all want to give me a scholarship to dance, then I just can't. I can't do it. Well, tell us, you mentioned something a little while ago that you're studying to be a doula. Yes. Tell us about that. So after my experience with both my daughter and my son, actually with my daughter, I had a liver condition called cholestasis, which I had never heard of. It makes your hands and your feet itch. I'm trying to think of what it would be so much like, yeah, dorm pregnancy. Oh, wow. But it's like an extreme, like you can't. There's nothing you can do. And there's no rat. Like nothing that would indicate why you would be itching, but you just feel like inside of your hands and your feet. And so I was telling my doctor, and she's like, oh, you're fine. You're just swollen. And I said, no, ma'am, I don't think this is normal. So I did the absolute worst thing that you can do. I googled. And I found out I was dying, and I had all that. And that was obviously not true. But so after I told her that, she said, well, stay off of Google. But I'm like, I will feel more comfortable if you just did the blood test, or just appease and just do the blood test. And then she caught and go, oh, you're right. You have cholestasis. And we're going to have to monitor that. So Googling can be good. I never. Yeah, if it doesn't freak you out too much before you actually get to the things, because I thought I had all kind of tumors and stuff, but apparently that was not a thing. So they can just do a blood test and tell you? Oh, that's nice. So they did the blood test, and they had to monitor me. But the thing is that it can stunt the baby's growth, which is what was happening with my daughter. So they ended up inducing me earlier. She was about a month early. And they ended up inducing me to get her out so she could continue to develop. She wasn't developing anymore. Oh, wow. So that was a little bit of a situation. But my next pregnancy, Madula says, well, we just have to keep your liver flushed out. Drink some dandelion tea. And that was it? Didn't it work? Didn't have it. Everything cleared and like nothing. So that's why you have a lot of hashtag saying holistic healing. Yeah. That's why I was going to ask you that. I'm not against Western medicine, obviously. If you need stuff, do what works. But there's just so many things that if you can't make it. Some people don't have the insurance. Like if you can't make it to these certain avenues quickly, there are certain things that if it's not life-threatening or anything like that that you can do to release and try, that might be easier for you to keep up with. So it's more of that kind of thing. So when she did that, it blew my mind. Like there's studies on how eggplant can help lower your blood pressure if people have a preclampsia during their pregnancy. If you eat enough eggplant, that can help prevent that. So it's just like those little things. It's like, why don't they tell us? Yeah. So it's a huge believer. Because as you know, my Taylor has alopecia. And she now has a shaved head. Gorgeous girl. Thank you. Well, when she decided to shave her head, it was completely bald at the top. She had just a little patch that you can kind of cover up the bald spot. Well, it just got battered up. She was like, I got to do it. Well, one of my girlfriends is she heals through food. And she's amazing. And she sat with us in the kitchen. And we changed our whole way of eating. Taylor got off a gluten and dairy, which she needed to do a long time ago. And she also has other autoimmune issues. Her hair is now back. It's now back. Are you serious? I'm not kidding. I'll have to show you the picture. Because it's incredible. I'm serious. Like all this, a whole handful of hair was gone. I did also bring her to see my little Chinese doctor who does my acupuncture. Oh, you have to. Oh, she's amazing. And she did acupuncture on her head. I mean, it wasn't just the top. It was the sides. It was the whole bag. And forever, there was no blood. Because once you put the needle in there, and there's no redness coming to it. So it's saying there's no blood flow. And your cuticles need blood flow to grow, right? I'll never forget the day she came running out of Taylor's room screaming. I mean, little bitty doctor. We have blood. We have blood, you know? But it's all because I swear it's all the change in the diet. She was vegan for a year. Not saying you have to be vegan. I mean, she eats meat now. But at the time that I swear by it, that's what helped her. That's what helped her. They say that information and mucus are like the number one causes of disease in your body. Every disease starts with either information or with buildup of mucus. And a lot of that is coming from what we eat and how we treat our bodies and what we're putting in our bodies and all the things. So if you can make those changes like what she's doing, sometimes out of 10 are going to see very drastic changes. That's amazing. Yes. Hands down, that's what saved her head. And now she still has, like I noticed the other day, she gets patches here and there. And it's a seasonal thing. But then they'll grow back. So I'm like, you going to grow your hair back? She's like, nah, nah. Yeah, I'm like, no, girl. She was good ball. She was. I'm loving it. I'll be kind of sad as she got the hair back. That's her thing. It is. Every now and then she'll play with a wig here and there. But it's hilarious. She comes down. One time she got it just for the fun of it. Her and her friend went to a party city and she came back with this blonde wig. And she came downstairs and like, yeah, no. Yeah, I know. You don't want to go in here. She doesn't need that. So what is the training for the doula? What does that look like? So I'm training under the doula that I had, that I am swearing by, she literally saved my life. So we're doing sessions to where she has me doing a course online. But we're also doing a lot of in-person sessions as well. So I'm going to be going to some births. I'm going to do a lot of hands-on work. I'm super excited for that. I don't know what to expect because every breath can be so different. But I'm very super excited for that. But it's a lot of reading. I want to say my book list is probably at least 25 books long. So I'm not even going to ask what you're reading right now because I'm probably not reading it. Yeah, birthing babies, like all the things. It's a lot. Another reason why I was kind of looking forward to getting into this field is when I was pregnant with my son. I had gone to the nail salon and a girl was telling me how bad of an experience she had at the doctor, going to get a checkup. Let's make a long story short. She decided that she was going to have her baby at home because her and her husband had watched YouTube videos of how to have a baby. And I'm like, no. Don't do that. I'm not telling you have to be in the hospital, but at least have a midwife, have somebody there that you feel. But she just felt so unsupported that that was her. It's so sad. Yeah, so I was like, what can we do about this? Like, we have to. I'm just looking forward to hopefully making somebody feel comfortable enough that they want support. To be their advocate at either appointments or at the hospital when you get there. Because it is scary when you're in labor and you don't have anyone vouching for you. That's the main thing for Dula, is being like you're saying, being an advocate. That's the whole reason for having one. Obviously, some people say, well, I'm not going to have it because I'm going to go on to the doctor. But your husband, I know my husband's in there. He's not going to know all the questions you want to have to ask. There are so many women that are dying in childbirth and a lot of it's because they're having C-sections that they didn't need to have. And but to have that person there that can be monitoring and say, hey, I don't think it's time to do that. Or I don't think that's a good decision for her. That's what you really want. Yeah, for sure. I didn't have a Dula, but I used the Vanderbilt midwives for both of my birds. And so they I knew that they weren't going to push me in a direction I wasn't comfortable with. So if I had if I was using a doctor, I would have had a Dula just after a lot of research and stuff. But I'd never think you should always have a Dula. If you like, I'd never think it could hurt. My birds are also very fast. So it was like. Yeah, and midwives. Yeah, midwives too. I don't mean to isolate that. Midwife, Dula, yeah. Anybody for that can be there. I don't ever remember that being offered or like me knowing of what a Dula was whenever my kids were born. Yeah, I don't know. It's become more popular I think in the last like 10 years or so as there have been. So I think like the C-section rate became so high or that's kind of when I was having just as six years ago. It was like, you know, sometimes they'll kind of push you into a C-section because you have been in like, there's always medical reasons. You always want to trust your doctor. Like I'm not saying that. I think it's just, we learned a lot about women needing to advocate for themselves and needing someone else in the room to do that for you because you're in labor. Yeah. No, there's also been a boom in the profession in general. So I want to say even 10, 15 years ago, the amount of Dulas in that field that there are now wasn't as much of a thing like you might, in your area might've been three or four of them. As of now it might be 10 or 15, you know? So that just wasn't as popular as the situation. And they also support you after with like nursing or you know, like after the baby's there, which is so important now too. Because I, okay, this is, I told y'all when I was going to do this podcast that I was going to lay it all out there. So here we go. I hope this is not the one that John decides to listen to. So I could not breastfeed. Taylor was tongue-tied and I had inverted nipples. So I told you I'm throwing it out there. I like it. You got the inverted nipple at pregnancy or you always had them and didn't know? I think I always had them and did not know. What? So she was not latching on, she could not, they wanted to clip her right then and there and I freaked out and was like, absolutely not. And looking back, I wish I would have done it for both of my kids. I would have tried a little bit harder, but I had someone in my face like kind of yelling at me. And I was like, she made me uncomfortable. So of course they'll be inverted, you know? Because I'm freaking out. That shame in the hospital after that from a lot of people about breastfeeding and like where people like nurses have shamed, moms for not doing it correctly or not wanting to do it as often as they felt like they should have been doing it. I couldn't breastfeed either. I couldn't with, Ellie came so early that I wasn't even making milk when she came out. So we tried, but she had to be fed in the, in the Niki for a little bit, a tiny bit. And then she had to be fed in like a little special theater bottle because she was so tiny. So we just had to, yeah, we had to get her formula. And then my son, same situation, but they didn't catch it. He had a lip tie anytime time. They didn't even let me know until a month and a half after he was born. She had it too. She had a lip tie. She had a lip tie. She had both. Yeah, so I couldn't figure out. That's why I had a lactation consultant come over. I mean, we had a chef making me lactate and producing food. I mean, I tried everything. So I say that to say, I don't know if it was, you know what I mean? Like sometimes it just does not work out. Like we tried all the things and I flipped out too. When they took him back to do, they had a laser for him, but you didn't hear him back. I was in there. I remember whenever I decided that I just had to give up. Honestly, it was, I think the day or two after we got home and by this point I was having to supplement because I mean, she wasn't eating and she was losing weight. And so the sweet little nurse came in at one point in the hospital and was just like, it's okay, Jamie. She was like, don't be hard on yourself, you know, this doesn't happen for everyone. She was, I'll never forget her ever, ever, ever in my life. So she taught me how to supplement. And when I got home, finally, John, I had to sit me down because y'all was exhausted. You could see I was holding the camera. My mom was holding the baby and you see the camera doing this because I was falling asleep. But, and then at that point I just went and I just did formula and I remember just crying and crying and crying and saying, because you felt like a failure, you know? And it was such a job. And when you're working out hard at doing it and it's not coming and it's not produced, you're like, what am I, why can't I do this? My friends who still have frucious bowl because they were just pumping it out. And I'm like, what am I doing wrong? I'm eating cookies, I'm doing this, I got dates. Like I'm doing all the things and nothing is working. But I wish, like you're saying, I wish people were able to talk to women and have better conversations surrounding breastfeeding because I've known girls too that have told me I have such bad postpartum trying to keep up with breastfeeding. And you don't even know, really. I feel like, like I kind of had it with Justin and didn't really know until I was out of it that I was a little depressed and just overwhelmed. So being a doula, you're gonna be so good at it. I can already tell. If I was a third, you're coming over. I'm ready, girlfriend. I got the candles. I got everything that I didn't get to use from her. Get the bag you packed. And you know what's so cool? This is why we started this podcast, is to be able to talk about inverted nipples. And things like this, right? You wanna just have a life, Jamie. Everybody go check your nipples and make sure. It's only too hard on yourself. So since this is our holiday episode, I wanna hit like real quick on traditions or food or like we need to talk a little holiday. Oh yes, you can't skip Christmas. I love Christmas. Yeah, what do you do at home like that you've done since you were young that you still do? So the main thing we do is we have to read a story out the Bible before we open our presents. And I remember that I'm doing it and I remember hating it so much as a kid. My granddad would break it, his old Bible and all the presents would be sitting there and they'd glory and I'm like, no, just one. Okay, wait, is this Christmas morning or Christmas Eve? Christmas morning. Yeah, we didn't do Christmas Eve. Christmas morning. But now that I'm older and I think about it, that's something that I definitely wanna like carry on through my kisses. I feel like it gives you like a sense of like, this isn't about me. This isn't about this right now. Like it's fun to do it, but there's such a bigger reason or surrounding Christmas. And I really wanna make sure we continue that now that he's passed, continue that tradition throughout my family. And my other big tradition is all the music, all the cookie decorating, all the things. When does the music start in your house? My music starts the day, well, I'll probably say the night of Thanksgiving. Yeah, that's usually, yeah, yeah. Right after we clean the dishes from Thanksgiving then I'm pulling everything out, I'm ready to go. I can't wait, I love Christmas so much. That's what we do, because typically our guys work a lot of times. So for Thanksgiving, John would either go to work early and come home later or, so anyway, sometimes during the day he's not there. So that's when the girls and I take everything out and we start decorating Christmas. That's our, yeah, we usually have guys over that, you know, they can't get home. So you should have teammates over if they don't have family or if it's just like them and their kid or whomever. That way they don't like, everybody's not like by themselves in their little places everywhere. Like we can kind of get together and love on each other a little bit, have a good time, have some food. This year I'm gonna do something a little different. I've learned how to make a vegan heavy cream from charity, my friend charity, Derek Morgan's wife. And so I'm gonna try to cook all my cakes and pies, vegan this year. And if I can figure out how to do that and still keep my grandmama's flavor in there then I'm gonna be on to something. So I'm looking forward to that. You can do it, you can do it. I'm looking forward to that, so. What is yours, what do y'all decorate? Well, we decorate right after Thanksgiving as well, but like in my house, in my mom, when we grew up, my mom would, you know, we'd get the fake tree down from the attic, we'd all put it together and do all the branches and it was like, you know. So uncomfortable. And then we'd all hang the ornaments, it was so sweet. And so the first year that Josh joined us and like the family, he's like, all right, what are the rules? Like how do I put the ornaments on? We're like, there are no rules. And then he hangs the first ornament and we're all like, ooh, no. I can't put it there. Like that's mom's favorite. It has to go here, it has to go here. So I feel like decorating the tree is like our big thing. I love decorating the tree. But Josh's family does Christmas Eve, they open all the gifts. Which kind of, I know, and I feel like some people, like I have no other families that do that too, but it works out because when we do like Christmas Eve with his family, this is so new to me. Oh, that's nice. Whenever we started having kids, we lived in, well, Taylor was born in Georgia, Bailey was born in Texas. And then we moved to Boston when Bailey was just a baby and Taylor was four. So that's their main Christmas time. But we didn't have any family around. We didn't do anything on Christmas Eve. So to make it special for them, I would let them open Christmas gifts from our parents and aunts and uncles and stuff like that. Cause I wanted Christmas Eve to be fun. Yeah, do something. Yeah, that's really nice. We'll have to figure out how we're gonna navigate that. So now that you said that, they haven't been old enough to really know the difference, but we'll be in the same spot. Cause unless our family can't get up here, then we're usually just kind of hanging out. The first couple of years we would go to like Magianos or you know, Valentino's just go sit down and just have dinner together, whatever they were serving that day. But now we've been trying to have a little bit more of like a home situation, like people over and things. Yeah, to make traditions for your kids now. I know that's the shift is then you come into your own traditions and you're no longer doing what your parents did. And it's interesting. Well, yeah, that's why we had to invite people because I didn't know how, I don't know how to cook holiday food for two people. It's like either you're cooking it for 18 or like, what am I doing? So we had to go out to dinner cause I was making all this food the first year and he was like, what are you gonna do with it? What do you cook besides pies, vegan? Maybe vegan. Yeah, maybe vegan, I'm praying on it. Everything, we usually do like a turkey, salmon, brisket, macaroni and cheese, mashed potatoes, like all the things, sweet potatoes, cornbread. I don't do anything without cornbread. Cornbread is a food group in my house. So we're doing, make sure we have our honey cornbread and then a vegetable. If I don't have vegetables, Kevin will pass out. So we're gonna have some type of green bean, Brussels sprouts or something green and that fits that requirement. And then all the cakes and pies That's amazing. We do breakfast. You do? Yeah, so that's a tradition that I got from my in-laws. I don't remember why they did it, but she wakes up and she does a huge brunch. And I know why because she said Thanksgiving was so close and it's all the same foods. Oh, that's true. So I kind of took that on and I in fact, if John has to work in the morning or after opening gifts, we'll still do a small brunch at night. Yeah, that's a good idea actually. I love that. Yeah. I might have to steal that one from you. Go for it. I feel like we do Christmas, we do Christmas dinner kind of on, well we can do all of it. It's like Christmas Eve, then brunch on Christmas because it takes us like four years to open gifts. I swear. It's like, we're all in the family room. It's like, someone needs a drink. Someone's got a piece. Someone's got to do this. Someone's got to do that. And then we all do it one at a time. Oh wow. Do you guys just like go for it? Oh my gosh. It takes so long, but it's fun. And the kids know they'll see a similar package and they're like, okay, on the count of three. Yes. One, two, three, and then they'll open it together. But do they tell each other? We tell each other. Yeah, you hurry it up and open it. That is so cute. I used to do that with my sister. We said it's so cute. Yeah, my family used to wrap everybody's gifts in like their own, like everybody had different wrapping paper. So you didn't get disappointed if you're like, any more for me. Like, you know what's yours and what's somebody else's and that's it. So we'll see. Kevin and I are trying to figure out where we're gonna approach Christmas with our kids. Right now we're saying we're gonna do just three gifts. And I said every year, we'll see if they wear us down. But right now, like that's the plan, just the three gifts. Wow, that takes a lot of strength. I was gonna say, I don't know if I did. I do know that people that, I know families that do do that. And I love that. We're gonna make them like volunteer or something and then we'll just do like a specified number and then we'll just like leave it at that. So it doesn't turn into like a whole thing. I love like the Christmas Santa came moment. So I just try to like make it look like more than it is. Oh, please. Or else you have to get like so many gifts and then they just open all of them and they're too overwhelmed to even know what went on. That's why I do the grandparents in all the day before because I don't want them to get confused and, you know. That's really good. Yeah, well, we'll figure it out. Well, it's gonna be fun. Well, thank you so much. Thank you for having me. I had a great time. And your dress like stunned all of us. I know. All of the episode. I love it. I love Christmas. I was ready to break out. I know. But like go for it. Well, where can people find you or the foundation? What wherever you want people to follow? Our foundation website is buyatfamilylegacy.org. And then we're on Instagram, Twitter, all the things. Kevin's page links to that. My page is Clark Byer. I'm not gonna tell you to go there because I really don't have much on there. But if you like, page is on. And I'm linked to the foundation page as well. But yeah, follow our page. And we do a lot of cool things throughout the year and we can use all the support we can get to help reach everybody in Tennessee that we can. I mean, we do all around the world, but we really try to love on Tennessee because Tennessee has really loved on there. So. Aww. That's so nice. Oh, we love you. Yeah. You're amazing. Thank you so much. Thank you for everything you do for the community. I appreciate it. It's awesome. Get up now.