 Hello, hello, hello, everyone. My name is Matt and I'm here with the amazing and wonderful Helena Hart and today we're going to be talking about the number one mindset to attract a soulmate relationship that lasts. So why is this important? So the whole concept of mindset, right? Creating the right mindsets is important because if you feel like you endlessly have to learn all these new techniques and tactics to attract a guy or if you feel like you have to play games with men when you're around them in order to attract them and keep them attracted to you, what you really need to do is learn the right mindset. Because what the mindset does, what all these tactics and techniques really do is a lot of them are just emulating somebody that already has kind of this confident, attractive mindset that just naturally attracts men. The way that it works is your thoughts, right? Create your feelings and your feelings then in turn influence your actions. And if you have the right mindsets, then the right actions are going to naturally come out of you. And there's other things that you can do with communication and techniques and stuff to kind of fine tune and hone it, but having the right mindsets is by far the most important kind of foundation for attracting and keeping the right kind of guy. So what happens a lot of times is women come to us and they'll be struggling, they're struggling in these relationships. They might attract a guy, maybe things go really great initially, but down the road what ends up happening is they end up sabotaging things or maybe they learned a bunch of tactics and techniques which got the guy kind of attracted initially or kind of deepened the attraction that they had together and then kind of all these things start coming up, right? Her insecurities start coming up. And a lot of times women will end up sabotaging what's going on with a man, not completely accidentally, not meaning to. And a lot of times the best way to fix that is through kind of a shift in your mindset. And so if you feel like nothing, no matter what you do, nothing will ever be good enough for a man, then this is what you need to be learning about right here. And so the things that we're going to be talking about, Helena is going to be doing a lot of the talking today. And here are some of the things that we're going to be talking about. So one of them is going to be the four beliefs that you need to have about yourself to have the mindset that attracts a soulmate relationship. The second thing that we're going to be talking about is the biggest mindset mistakes that repel good quality men who want a real relationship with you. And it's kind of like what we were just talking about a second ago where a lot of times these things start coming up or these things that have been hidden or these things that have kind of created kind of like a toxic foundation for a relationship. And these are very important to create awareness around and get rid of. And so we'll be talking about those today. We're going to be talking about how to use the right mindset to create an irresistible attraction with the man that you want to have in your life. And the last two things that we're going to be doing is we're going to have a really, it's a really cool and powerful exercise that can help you become much more confident with men and kind of incorporate this mindset that we're going to be talking about today. And if you haven't been one of my coaching clients, if you haven't gone through one of my coaching processes, you've never seen this before. I created this about five years ago. And it's really, really powerful and it's made a massive impact on a lot of the women that have used it. And then at the end, we're going to be doing question and answer because I'm sure that you're going to have some questions for us. And so we're going to do some question and answer for you. And so let me introduce Helena real quickly. We're just Helena. Helena is one of my favorite people in the world. And we were just talking last night, actually, I was telling her how much I really appreciate everything she's done for a commitment connection and being a part of this business. And she's really been the backbone of the whole commitment connection YouTube channel, which has had explosive growth because of her and a lot of the great ideas and information and stuff and energy that she brings to our YouTube channel. And so I really appreciate, Helena, I really appreciate you for that. And Helena is now becoming our head dating coach here at Commitment Connection. And she's going to be taking on that mantle and doing our coaching for us really because she is an amazing coach. And every time she sent me some of the testimonials and stuff that she gets from people and every time I look at them, it's just so amazing. Like the work that Helena does in helping women attract great guys into their lives. All the testimonials about these women getting married who have been Helena's clients. I mean, it's absolutely fantastic. And so she's helped people kind of turn around situations where they felt like they were lost or stuck or even completely hopeless. And it's pretty amazing what she does. And so if if you want to attract and keep a soulmate relationship, Helena is really, in my opinion, the best person that you could possibly go to for this information. And so I'm just going to turn it over to Helena so that she can kind of get started in take take the rest of a lot of the rest of this stuff going forward. So, Helena, thanks for being here. Thank you and hi to everyone who's joining us. I can't see who's joining or anything, but we're so excited to have you here. Thank you. That was like I'm like getting all teary eyed over here when I didn't you're going to say all that nice stuff. And I'm just I'm really excited to say I'm a little nervous too, because this topic is so it's just so important to me. It's so near and dear to my heart. My back for those of you who don't know me, my background is in psychology. You know, I went to grad school for psychology. So the whole thing about mindsets is just crucial, in my opinion, when it comes to really attracting the man and the relationship of your dreams. And, you know, for myself, I had the knowledge, like I said, I'm a master's degree in psychology, you know, certifications and everything. But I've always just been interested in helping people, helping women specifically just like improve their lives. But really, you know, the reason why I decided to become a relationship coach was because of my own experiences and just the way I was before I turned everything around. For those of you who don't know my story, I was always like attracting emotionally unavailable men, men who didn't want a committed relationship. And just the idea of a high quality guy showing up and just, you know, saying, I want to commit myself to you forever and devote my life, you know, to this relationship, that was just like not even in my consciousness at all. I had no idea what that would feel like or feel like. And, you know, something that a lot of my clients experience, too, they sort of seem to have it all together on the outside. And they're really like beautiful and sweet and smart and successful and just great catches. But for some reason, they just can't, you know, they haven't had an easy time in their love lives, like attracting men or like for myself, I never really had a problem attracting men initially, but they never really stuck. Like at least the ones I wanted to be with never stuck around and took things to the next level and they sort of always left me broken and hurt. So the number one thing I had to do was shift my mindset. And we're going to talk, you know, we're going to talk about exactly how to do that today. And hopefully this is stuff that you've never really heard from me before. And I really think it's like really in all areas of your life, but especially your love life. So, Matt, did you want to add anything? Or can we just go ahead and go with the number one mindset? Yeah, no, I didn't I didn't want to add anything. I just want to say hi to everybody that's here. We've got a lot of people on our our live stream here. So hello, everybody. Hello, Darla. Hello, Array, Janet, Heather, everybody. So thank you for being here and make sure you say hi if you're here. Leave a comment. OK, yeah, everybody. OK, so I'm just going to jump right in if that's OK with you. The number one mindset that you need to attract a soulmate relationship is that having the relationship you want is absolutely possible for you. And not only is it possible, it is on its way to you. It's like about to happen. And we're going to go into the four beliefs that you need to embody this mindset. But do you have anything you want to add there before we jump into the four components to this? No, we're calling this the goddess mindset. And so it's it's this it's kind of the the this mindset kind of encompasses so many different things. And when you hear it, it might kind of feel like, oh, that's kind of broad or generic or something. But it really what when we when Helena talks a little bit more about it and then we go through this exercise that we go through a little bit later, I think you'll get a little bit better of a sense of what it is exactly that we're talking about and why this is so powerful and important if you want to really attract the right guy into the right type of relationship for you. Yeah, if you want to stay around for that exercise, when I personally first did this exercise, I was shocked by the results that I got. So you'll want to definitely stay tuned for that. So like I mentioned, the number one mindset that you need to embody is that you can absolutely have the relationship you want. And not only that, it is just right on its way to you right around the corner. And I really do believe that if you want something like to attract a great guy and get into a long term relationship, that it is just like automatically yours. It's automatically guaranteed to you and it's you're worthy of it. You're worthy of it just by your sheer wanting of that. That's really what I believe. So the first belief we're going to be talking about four beliefs that are kind of like components to this mindset. And they're so, so important. I'm just going to jump right into the first one. And that is that you've already created your dream relationship. In a sense, your life experience has caused you to know what you don't want in a guy, know what you want in a relationship, all of that stuff. You've already created it. That work is done basically. Now you just need to allow it. And this is a very feminine energy quality, trusting and allowing a really feminine energy qualities. Whereas leaning forward and working hard and striving for this relationship or running after a man and trying to make him give you what you want is a very masculine energy quality. So anytime you've like made the man the goal or like the prize in your mind, you kind of can't help it. There's this subconscious drive that makes us want to like go after him or prove ourselves to him or make him give us the relationship that we want. And when we do that, it's like you can't help that just pushes the man away. When we put him on a pedestal like that. So you want to switch all of this around. You're not trying to make things happen in your love life anymore. You're leaning back into your feminine energy and allowing things to happen, allowing that man to show up in your life experience. If you haven't met your soulmate yet or if you are with a man or you have one particular man in mind, you're going to, you know, allow things to unfold between the two of you in a way that feels really good where you're not like pushing and shoving your way into trying to get this man to give you what you want. Never tried that, just know that it doesn't work. So like I mentioned, your life experience has already caused you to create it. That's kind of like the masculine energy side. Now you want to lean back into your feminine energy. And how do you know when you're in the state of allowing? And the answer to that is it just feels good. So anytime you're feeling good, you're in the state of allowing. And, you know, if you could feel like clarity or appreciation or eagerness, anticipation, and it also feels like results, because I don't want you to think that, oh, I just want you to feel good, even if things aren't going so well in your love life. It also definitely feels like results, because I found what's showing up in your life is just more momentum of these beliefs and mindsets that are going on within you. So what happens for a lot of women is their awareness of what's been going on in their life, particularly if they haven't had a lot of really good experiences in dating and relationships. Your awareness of that might be like training yourself into this place that's not allowing improvement. And that might sound a little complicated. So let me give you some examples. If you've been single for a long time and you're feeling burnt out in dating, if you're like constantly complaining to your girlfriends or your family, like there are no good men out there, all men are liars or cheaters or they only want one thing or all the good men are taken, whatever you're telling yourself is, in my experience, what's going to keep showing up. So if what has been going on in your love life hasn't felt good to you, you have to take your attention off of that just for a little while to get yourself into this space that will actually allow improvement because I've really found that the story you're telling yourself is creating the results that you're getting in your love life. So it's about shifting the story often to something that feels better, something that improves your emotional state. Just a little bit, you don't have to jump to the if you're in total hopelessness about your love life. It's going to be hard to jump all the way to your bliss. Right. So you're just reaching for a little bit of relief. Just a little tiny shift in the story that will allow you to start to feel better. And I've really found the better you feel, the more you're allowing the more good things you're allowing to show up in your love life. And better men will start showing up or if you're in a relationship, your man will start to see you in a whole new way because think about it. No man wants to feel that your happiness and your self-esteem is like hinging on him doing something or not doing something. You know, men want to know that you are the source of your own happiness. And a lot of times when you're looking for your soulmate, a lot of a lot of us can get into this place where you're looking to fill this gap between you, where you are and where you want to be. Basically, you're looking to fill this gap between you and you. So when you show yourself that you can fill that gap on your own, regardless of what a man is doing or not doing, like bingo, that's when you start getting some huge results in your love life. So it's about really matching your beliefs and your energy to your desires rather than matching it to what's been going on. What's been going on hasn't been pleasing to you. And I know these are really big concepts and it gets a little complicated. So we'll definitely do Q&A at the end. But Matt, did you have anything you wanted to add there? So I want to create a kind of a distinction here. So was that was that the first one? Oh, yeah, I switched the order one without telling you. I'm sorry. Yes, that's the first one. OK, so what happens a lot of times with women that come to us and kind of situations that I've seen with women who have experienced this whole the opposite, right? So the the thing we're talking about here is allowing something to happen. The opposite is kind of this this eagerness, right? It's this like it feels like scratching, clawing, trying to get somewhere, right? Trying to get something to happen. Like it almost turns into this madness, right? Where you just it's like you're trying to do all these things and you're like a lot of women come when they come to us in this situation. They usually feel like they aren't there. They're never going to be good enough, right? They're no matter how much they do, no matter how much effort they put in, it's like they're never good enough for this guy or a guy. And they have all these different relationships where they feel like they're giving everything to this relationship and they're ending up with nothing. You know, they're still in the same situation. They're still in this, you know, either casual relationship or they're in relationship limbo where it's not, you know, moving forward and pushing forward. And so, you know, when you do that to a man, it, you know, it might not be, but it feels like neediness, right? It feels like desperation. It feels like it feels like he needs to, like, push away and get some space because he feels like he's being smothered. And so, you know, it's amazing. This is actually one of the biggest kind of transformations that a lot of women make when they go through some of our stuff is that they have this experience where all of a sudden they're doing, they're putting themselves into this situation where they're allowing. And men start completely like what Helena said. Men start reacting and responding completely differently, right? And all of a sudden you'll see a guy who, you know, you feel like he's pulling away. You feel like he's trying to get away from you. All of a sudden he starts kind of moving towards you and he starts taking sometimes these little baby steps. Sometimes it's big leaps and you'll see him start stepping up and acting completely differently, not always because sometimes there's foundational things that need to be fixed. But many times it happens that way. And so, yeah, I don't want to steal it from you. Yeah, for me, it feels like it's like a pressure valve gets released, you know, like, oh, she's not she's not waiting on me to make some decision. She doesn't need me to do something in order to feel good and be happy. And it's a little counterintuitive. But once a man really gets the sense that you're the source of your own happiness, you're not constantly trying to get things from him. It sort of makes him want to to step up in a relationship and, you know, and make you feel good and make you happy because it takes the pressure off, it takes the pressure off. When you stop trying to make things happen, instead, start allowing things to happen. So, yeah, can I move on to number two? Yes, please. OK, number two is you want to believe that he exists or believe that your dream relationship exists. So basically, if you don't believe that you're, you know, the man of your dreams that you've always wanted to be with doesn't exist. He can't show up in your life or even if he did, you wouldn't be able to see him. There's not like a framework in your brain yet for that kind of man, especially if you've had bad experiences where you only attracted men who lie or cheat or who don't want to commit. It can be easy to not even have a framework in your brain of a high quality man who really wants a life long, committed relationship. I've heard that analogy before is kind of like when you get a new car and maybe you haven't noticed that car, you know, on the road before. But once you buy it or you start, you know, looking, researching it, all of a sudden you see that car everywhere that happened to me. I haven't bought a new car in like three years, but all this. I didn't I don't know a lot about cars, but I started kind of looking into it and I started seeing it everywhere because now I had a framework in my brain for that. So if you don't believe he exists, he can't show up. Or if you don't believe it's possible for things to work out between you and your man, if you're in a relationship, like I mentioned, in the first belief, you're training yourself into this place that won't allow improvements. You have to believe that it's possible for you. You have to believe that the man that you want to be with exists and that, you know, your dream relationship exists in order for it to show up. And that's that's a shorter one. That's really all they have for that one. Matt, do you want to add anything? Yeah, one of the things that I'd like to add is that a lot of times you don't really know that this exists because a lot of times you might think to yourself like, yeah, OK, this man is out there. I think this man is out there. I believe this man is out there. But deep down, you don't really. And that that is where the sabotage comes up, right? Because it's not like this conscious level thing where you're like, yeah, I don't, you know, and sometimes sometimes it is you'll hear women a lot. I'm sure you've heard women many times in your life. You know, every single person on here has probably heard women talk this way where they're like, you know, I there are no good men out there. And, you know, the good men don't exist, you know, like, you know, men just want this and men are that and blah, blah, blah, blah. And a lot of times we pick that up subconsciously. We pick it up from our parents, right? We inherit it from people, our parents, from our social circle, from people that we are around when we're growing up. And then maybe we want to have a different thought process on it because we know that if you believe that he's not out there, when you see a guy and he's a great guy, you're going to turn him into a guy just in your mental state that is a bad guy, you know, you're going to find reasons to make him not a good man to be with, even if he's a great, awesome guy. If a guy comes up and he's got a lot of great qualities, you'll find reasons to reject him. You'll find reasons to push him away. And it's that kind of a thought process and belief system that really will sabotage everything that you're doing, even if you're not consciously aware that it's going on. If it's kind of this deep level emotional thing, this visceral emotional thing, a lot of times you'll see it come up that way where you're like, it's something that it just comes out of you, you know, because it is kind of this deep internal thing is it comes out in your behavior, the way you talk, somebody says something, you know, you'll catch yourself saying things like, oh, well, there just aren't any good men or you'll catch yourself thinking that way or you'll catch yourself feeling that way. And that's all the same thing. So that's all I wanted to say for that. Yeah, I knew I was forgetting something. That's exactly what I wanted to say that, you know, you'll make him the wrong guy, even if he's the right guy, if you don't have this belief. I was like the queen of, you know, a guy showed up and he just wanted to love me to death. And I didn't want anything to do with that kind of guy. I always found something wrong. That was a belief that I created. Like there's always something wrong. Maybe, you know, he's really sweet and he treats me well, but I'm just not attracted to it. Or maybe I am attracted to him, but, you know, he doesn't want a relationship. I just always find something wrong with these really great, high quality guys. And it kept me apart from what I really wanted. So that is huge. And it really brings us right to the third belief. Can I jump into that one? Please do. Actually, you know what? Let me just shout out for a few people that are here, Miss Molly and Cheryl and Leanne and Carolyn and Janet and Darina. And yeah, thanks everybody for being here. If you're here, make sure you say hi and we'll answer some questions at the end. So, yep, go ahead. Okay. Hi everybody. It's so exciting. I can't see who's on here, but I love just knowing that people are here. It's awesome. It really changes the energy. So the third belief is you want to believe you deserve it. And it sort of goes along with the other one. Like if you don't believe that deep down, if you don't believe that you deserve a great guy, if you don't believe that you deserve a high quality man all to yourself, you know, that's going to, it's going to show up in your love life. You have to believe that you deserve it. And one thing I always say is the great thing about being a woman is that, you know, getting a man to see how wonderful you are and you know, want to be with you doesn't really involve all that much effort at all, effort in the traditional sense of doing a bunch of things and showing him how great you are. It's really about being who you are rather than doing something towards him. So it's about like uncovering, the work is in uncovering your own blocks to the love that we set up to try and keep ourselves safe. The work is on yourself. So then the right guy can just show up and you'll actually recognize love when it shows up and then allow it to become everything you've ever dreamed up. So these are kind of interconnected. But yeah, you have to believe that you deserve it. And some of these beliefs we might think of as like deep seated beliefs. I didn't want to mention this. And that to me feels like a lot of work. Like, oh my God, I have to go back decades when these beliefs were created and try and undo them. To me, that feels very like impossible. So what I want you to do is stop. Don't think of it as having to go back and undo all these deep seated beliefs. Just think of it as changing the habit of the thought. Because in my opinion, that's just what a belief is. It's a thought that you keep thinking. You don't have to go back and undo the belief. You just have to break the pattern of the thought. So if you are telling yourself negative things about yourself that you don't deserve a great man and a great relationship or maybe you're not pretty enough, you need to lose weight, you need to get your life together before a good guy can show up. You just have to break that thought process. And those negative thoughts won't keep affecting you unless you think them again. So this can be a lot easier than it seems. Sometimes it's about having someone to shine the spotlight on some of these patterns that you have. But that's the third one. You have to absolutely believe that you deserve it just because of who you are as a person. Not because of what you can do or give to a man. I've really found that so many of us have been brought up kind of placing our worth and our value on what we can do or accomplish or give to others. And those are all masculine energy traits, right? Doing and accomplishing and striving for goals. So the thought of someone just loving us for who we are just not because of what we do but just because of who we are deep down is kind of a foreign concept. A lot of us women out there, myself included for sure. And I see that in a lot of women that I work with. So it's something to start to think about. Just the awareness of that is kind of the first step to turn some of these patterns around. Do you wanna add anything to that one? Yeah, so just speaking to kind of the manifestation of kind of the belief system where you feel like you don't deserve a great guy or you don't deserve a great relationship, right? What ends up happening a lot of times with women who come from this mindset is what they'll do is they will, they'll settle. They'll end up settling for guys, for situations, for things that they don't really want, right? And what you'll see is a lot of times women will, they'll kind of latch themselves onto something because they're so afraid, right? It's like, okay, well, if I let go of this, what is that, where does that leave me? Am I ever gonna find a guy as good as this ever again? So a lot of times these women will end up settling. Sometimes they settle in abusive relationships. Sometimes they settle in relationships where they're not getting their needs fulfilled. Sometimes, which in my opinion is also a form of kind of abusing yourself, right? Is putting yourself in a situation where you're not getting your needs fulfilled. Or, so a lot of times they'll hang on to guys or situations just because it's convenient instead of really finding a situation in a man that they really want. Sometimes they'll settle for a relationship limbo or they'll settle for not actually getting what they want because they just don't feel like they deserve it. And flipping it around the other way, when you do feel like you deserve it, when you come into an interaction with a man and you talk and you speak from a place, not of entitlement, but from a space of really kind of feeling like you deserve something wonderful and that you're not gonna settle for anything less, it can be really, really attractive to a man. The difference between deserving and entitlement is entitlement is surrounded by expectations, right? It's surrounded by trying to force something to happen and making somebody do something, whereas deserving is more like it's this confidence and knowing and looking at at least the deserving in the way that we're talking about it is coming from a space of knowing what you want and not settling for anything less. And it's not wrapping expectations around, it's not forcing somebody to do something, it's not kind of crapping on a man for not being the way that you want him to be. It's coming from a space of loving yourself. It's coming from a space of knowing in your heart that you do accept yourself and that you accept others and that you're not going to settle for anything less than what you really deserve. And coming from that space, it actually raises your value in a man's eyes and he starts to look at you as a woman who deserves that and that's a really, really powerful place to come from. Yeah, I love that. And it's just everything else falls into place once you have that belief installed, so to speak. Because think about it, if you believe you deserve a great man and a great relationship, you're not going to tolerate bad treatment or neglect. You'd instinctively feel turned off if a man wasn't treating you well or if he was interested in other women or if he's clearly told you that he doesn't want a loving relationship. You just instinctively feel turned off. You'd get bored and lose interest rather than that stirring up something in you and making you want to lean forward and change his mind or prove yourself to him like, oh, well, if only I were different, then he would drop all these other women and just want to be with me or then he'd be available for a real committed relationship. And I can tell you from experience that if only thing is not a game, you're ever going to win. So it all starts with in you and this belief that you deserve a great man. Then everything just organically falls into place because if a man will start to see you as a super high value woman, that he's gonna have to treat you really well in order to keep you in his life. So can I move on to the fourth one? Okay. Let's do it. Number four, I muted myself and I'm like, yeah. Okay, yeah. So number four is, this one is so huge. Oh my gosh, it's the belief that you don't know how, you don't have to know how it's all going to come together in order for your love life to fall into place. And this is what holds everybody up in really any area of your life. Like I don't, this is what I want. And I don't, because of my past and because of my current experiences, I don't know how it's going to happen. I don't know, yeah, I don't know how, like let's say you wanna get married and start a family and you're like, well, time's running out for me. I don't see how that's possible. And just like the first belief that keeps you stuck in this kind of zone or space where it can't show up. So don't worry about the how, the how it's all gonna come about for right now is not your job. You just have to keep these beliefs in mind. And so just think about it. If what you want is to attract a great guy and get into this soulmate relationship and you don't know how it's all going to come together is criticizing yourself the right path? No, not at all. It's getting really specific and trying to make things happen in the aspects of your love life that you haven't figured out yet. No, I would say no. I would say it's leaning back and becoming more general about things. And therefore kind of soothing yourself to this place where you start to feel a little bit better. You start to reach for a little relief. That's your path, right? So you don't want to reach further than you believe. It's important to start telling yourself a new story like I mentioned in the first belief but you don't want to reach further than you believe. So if you, and let me give you some examples because I know these are really big concepts. So if you were to say something like, I'm going to meet the love of my life this month, right? Most people, if they haven't had a lot of luck in dating and relationships, they might not really believe that that, right? So it kicks in this voice, this critical voice in your head that might say, no, that's not possible. You're not good enough. Good men like that don't exist, right? So you want to, if that's happening for you, if you're starting to like contradict your desires with some of your beliefs, you're just getting too specific. When I'm back up and get more general, just something super general. I'm on the right path. I'm getting really good at this. Things are unfolding exactly how they're supposed to. You know, this great guy and this great relationship is just right there waiting for me and it's not going to come all at once. And I don't want it to come all at once because I couldn't handle it all at once. I just really appreciate that it's going to show up and unfold in a way that feels like ease in a way that I can easily recognize it and allow it to, allow it to unfold. So you just don't want to get too specific, especially when you don't know how all of this is going to work out. You want to back up and then become more general until you can kind of click into the certainty of some of these things. Then once you kind of start to believe these things like great men are all over the place, you deserve to have a wonderful relationship. Once you start attracting experiences that assist you in feeling that way, then you become more and more specific. So that's kind of a general overview of this fourth belief that just because you don't know how it's all going to come together, doesn't mean that it's not possible for you. You want to add anything to that one? Yeah, I want to kind of take a different kind of a spin and kind of a look at that and say there's, there's kind of this group of women that kind of run into the same problem over and over and over again. And it's, and it is exactly what you're talking about. It's kind of saying, okay, I already know what this is going to look like. I already know what he's going to look like. I already know what everything's going to look like. And usually what ends up happening is like we talked about before, they kind of wrap these expectations around their meetings with men. They wrap expectations around how things go and what happens with the man. And this principle that Helena's talking about right now is something that applies in everything in life. If you're building a business, if you're going into the gym for the first time and you're trying to exercise or you're looking to lose weight or whatever, a lot of times we'll come into it with this idea of how we want things to look. We're going to do this and we're going to do that and we're going to follow this diet and we're going to follow that diet. And we haven't even figured out if that actually, if that diet works for our bodies, we haven't figured out that maybe this type of way that you want to run this business or do this job might not be the best for you and your situation. A lot of times the women that are trying to find a guy with this mindset, what they'll do is I have this category, the syndrome that I call all the wrong men syndrome. And it's these women will get so fixated on, this guy's going to look like this and he's going to be this tall and he's going to act like this and he's going to have all these different features and he's going to come from this family and then they meet these great guys who are awesome, just amazing guys. And they're like, oh, well that's not the guy that I'm looking for. Even though, because it's good to know what you want but it's bad to get so fixated on things that don't matter that you miss a guy that you really would be awesome with a guy that you really could want, right? That would be perfect for you. That would be an amazing, charged relationship. I actually had a friend a few years ago who was telling me about how she ended up getting married to this guy and she was friends with them, right? And she kind of had this syndrome too, right? She knew this guy and they were friends and they hung out together and they enjoyed each other's company and they were into lots of the same things together. They're big into personal growth stuff. And she looked at him and she's like, yeah, but he's not the right guy. And why isn't he not the right guy? Because of this massive, because of this massive list of crazy expectations that narrows her possibility of having the right guy down to like three guys, one lives in India and another guy lives in Thailand and one's in Norway and she's in America over here with this massive ridiculous list of what she wants from a guy. And this guy, that's amazing. They have great chemistry together. They're into the same things. They have, they share similar values. They're growing in the same way together. She's looking at him and she's, oh, he's not the right guy, right? Because she's missing it. She's missing the guy that's right in front of him for this kind of fantasy that she's created that not only isn't realistic, but isn't ideal. And so a lot of times, this kind of belief system will prevent you from, you know, meeting a great guy who might be in front of you, meeting a great, having a great opportunity to attract a really great guy because it's too, it's just too narrow down to things that don't really matter. Yeah. Did I just go off on a tangent? No, it was great. No, I was just gonna say like, insisting on details always limits you, always, always limits you. Your, this feeling of urgency, like I needed to look this way with this specific kind of man on this timeline directly interferes with your ability to quickly attract your soulmate, whether or not he's in your life yet or if he's the man right in front of you, that urgency and that insisting upon the details like that always, it just always interferes with your ability to create results. And it's, I always say that the, you've had a history of attracting men where things didn't work out, your soulmate is probably not going to look like you think he might look, right? He's gonna be like this foreign animal to you and you're gonna have to get used to it, you know? A man who just like, it's not that you have to end up with some guy you're not attracted to because everyone worries about that. You will be way more attracted to the love of your life, your soulmate, however you wanna put it, then you were to the men who sort of lit your fire based on your old relationship patterns, old, sometimes toxic relationship patterns. And we might be getting to, this is like getting into the psychology of the science behind it, but yeah, that your Mr. Right will probably not look like how you thought he would look like. Or, you know, he might be a little different but I promise you the attraction in the chemistry will be way stronger and way deeper than any other man you've ever been with before. I can attest to that for sure. So that's all I had for that fourth belief is should we go into the exercise or before we get into that, do you wanna talk about? Yeah, so before we get into this exercise, I've got a really great exercise for you. Helena's actually, we've kind of changed things up a bit. We're doing something different than we've ever done before. So before we were taking kind of private clients on and so like I said, we're about to do this really great exercise and it's gonna help you kind of incorporate and it's really powerful. It's gonna help you incorporate a lot of these belief systems kind of see what might be lacking for you a little bit. But before we do that, I'd just like to talk about this new kind of group coaching program that we have going on. Helena's going to be leading this program. Did you wanna talk a little bit about what's gonna be in this coaching program that you've got? Yeah, absolutely, yeah. So like this is gonna be, I'm gonna be completely focused on this and actually not even going to be taking one-on-one coaching clients anymore. So I could totally just devote my whole, all of my energy to this group of women that I'm gonna be working with. So it includes four private coaching sessions with me. So this will be the only way to get a private session with me from here on out, most likely. And also weekly Q and A calls, a lot of video content and email access to me, which is something I rarely do, but I'm opening it up just for this program. So it's email coaching, personal coaching with me and group Q and A calls and a Facebook group. Am I missing anything there? I don't think so. Okay, so it's, yeah, let me double check here. Yeah, so group Q and A calls with you, personal access to Helena and with emails, you're gonna get four private one-hour coaching sessions with Helena that you're gonna use throughout the, the, it's a 12-week program, so you're gonna use those throughout the 12 weeks of the program. There's a video recordings of kind of, the name of this program is called the soulmate attraction system, right? And it's, there's video recordings that'll help you. If you feel like you're in kind of a space where you're feeling stuck or you're feeling like, you need to kind of break out of it and you want some help, you want some guidance with it, then that's what this program is about. It's about helping you kind of either attract a soulmate relationship with a guy if you're single or if you're seeing somebody, it's about really kind of letting go of the things that might be sabotaging your ability to create that soulmate connection with a man. And Helena's gonna be focusing on that. There's also a Facebook group, a private closed Facebook group where we're gonna have a coach that monitors that and is gonna be answering questions and stuff for you as well. So it's really a great deal and a lot of cool things that are going on with it. And so if you're interested in that, we're gonna talk a little bit about that more in a minute. If you're really interested in it and you really wanna sign up right now, there should be a link underneath here. There's either a button or, depending on where you're watching this, if you're on YouTube right now, there's a, in the description, there'll be a link in there if you're interested in checking out more about the program and you wanna sign up. And so let's jump into this exercise real quickly since it is such a powerful, awesome thing. And I know that so many of the wonderful women with us right now are going to want to gonna want to hear this stuff, right? So I'm gonna do the exercise. And so here's what it is, okay? What I want you to do, and if you have a pen and a piece of paper, you can use that or if you don't it's fine, you can just kind of imagine this in your mind. And so what I want you to do is just take a second and think about everyone in your world, right? Think about all the people that are in your world. And in ranking order, what I want you to do is take the top three people in your world who you believe have the best chance of having the type of relationship that you wanna have, right? So in ranking order, the top three, one, two and three, who are some people in your world, in your life, in your space? Who are the top three people that you can think of who you believe have the best chance of having the type of relationship that you wanna have? And so I'm gonna give you about 20 seconds, 30 seconds maybe, to figure this out. And so we'll just go ahead and begin. So think of top three people in your world who you believe have the best chance of having the type of relationship that you wanna have. Number one, two and three. 20 seconds was kinda short, so I'm gonna give you another 20 seconds. Just three people in your world who you believe have the best chance of having the type of relationship that you wanna have. Top three people. Okay, so what I want you to do is if you wrote this down, I want you to look at the list. If you came up with these people in your mind, in your head, I want you to think about these people in your mind. I want you to see this list in your mind. And now what I want you to do is I want you to figure out where are you on this list, right? And so there's usually three types of people who do this exercise with me. And I've done this with hundreds and hundreds of women before, and it's always this way, right? There's gonna be three types of women. There's gonna be women who never put themselves on that list, right? There are gonna be women that put themselves somewhere on the list, and then there are gonna be women who put themselves at the top of the list. And the question is where did you put yourself, right? If you didn't put yourself on this list, why didn't you put yourself on this list? If you put yourself on the list, but you're not number one, why did you put yourself where you put yourself? And if you did put yourself as number one, where in your relationships do you not put yourself as number one? And really this is an exercise in awareness. It's an exercise in kind of looking at the way that you treat your life, right? And a lot of times what I'll have women do is they'll say things like, well, you didn't say me, you didn't say, look at myself, and that's kind of the point, is do you come up for you, right? Are you somebody who comes up when you think about yourself and what you want and what you deserve? And this kind of goes back to this space where you look at yourself and if you believe that, if you have the mindset that this is coming for you, that this is gonna happen for you, you're gonna not only put yourself at the top of this list for this exercise, but you'll do it in every situation in your life. And after this, we're gonna go to question and answer, but real quickly, I just wanna say that we just went through this whole, like this whole kind of webinar, live stream that we just did, and we gave you kind of the answer to this exercise throughout this whole thing. We gave you this answer where we told you multiple times that it's about putting yourself first. It's about believing that this can happen for you. It's about believing that it will happen for you. It's about getting rid of these thoughts and these mindsets that are keeping you from believing that this can happen for you. And just looking at some of these comments, I can already see that there are a lot of people that did not put themselves first. Some of the people don't even know anybody that they believe should be on this list. And when you think about it from that standpoint, that's why coaching is so valuable. So if all we needed was information, if all we needed was book knowledge, then we'd all be thin, we'd all be rich, and we'd all have great relationships. And one of the reasons that we don't have a lot of these things is because we subconsciously sabotage ourselves. We prevent ourselves from getting what we want. We stop ourselves, I mean, how many people do you know who go on a diet and don't ever even lose any weight? Or go on a diet and lose weight and then gain it all back? Or who know what kind of a guy that they wanna have in their lives, but end up dating guys that are completely different or who know what kind of a guy would be good for them but end up with guys who are really bad for them. And a lot of times it's because we subconsciously sabotage ourselves. And so before we jump into the question and answer real quick, I just want to, there's gonna be some women who are on this live stream, who are on this webinar, and who are going to feel like they're stuck. They're gonna feel like they're in a place where they don't know what to do. They feel like they've tried pretty much everything and they aren't really getting what they want. Maybe you've purchased a whole bunch of low end programs and you've tried all these things and you feel like you're scrambling but you're not really attracting the guy, you're not really keeping the guy that you wanna have in your life. And so if you've been listening to us today and you feel like this stuff resonates with you and you feel like this is kind of the direction that you wanna go and you would like to be a part of a program where we take a look at what's really going on with you and your situation and help you fix it, then I wanna invite you to go and click the link below. There's a link in the description or if you're watching this on the webinar, there should be a button underneath here and go check out the program. And if it's right for you, there's gonna be, and before you do real quick, there's gonna be a couple of different types of people that go and click on the link and go to this next program. Like I said, like Helena said earlier, we're keeping this to a small intimate group of 15 people. And so if you go down there and it's open, then we haven't reached that 15 people yet. And so there's gonna be a couple of different types of people that go, right? And the first type is gonna be the person who really feels like this is right for you and you're gonna sign up and jump on board immediately and that's awesome. And then there's gonna be this other group of people who kind of feel like it's right for you and at the same time, you're gonna have your own kind of mind, kind of try to sabotage it. You're gonna have hesitancy that comes up for you. And usually it's around time or energy or money investment. And but here's the thing, right? Fear and indecision are what keep you stuck, right? So how long have you been kind of dealing with this situation? Has it been a couple months? Has it been a couple years? Many times the women that come to us are in this situation where they've had this problem go on for years, right? They've been dealing with this stuff for years and years and years, sometimes decades, right? And many times it's just a small little shift that they need to make in their mindset or something that they're doing that will completely open things up and change things dramatically for them. And so how long has this been a part of your world? And are you okay with feeling stuck, with feeling like you're not getting what you want and you're not going to get what you want for the next, I mean, six months, year, five years, 10 years? How long are you willing to kind of hold on to this and continue to allow yourself to stay in this stuck place? And if this program isn't right for you, that's fine, totally fine. There's plenty of people that it's not right for, right? We have a couple hundred people on this livestream right now and not everybody's joining the program. But if it is right for you, my suggestion is that you allow us to work together and push through, let's make the decision to move forward and push through together. And if this program, like we talked about before, this program, it's our highest end program, right? It's not a cheap program. It costs more than any of the other programs that we have. And so if money is a factor for you, what we do have is if you go to the next page, there's an offer page there, and then at the bottom it says get started now and if you click on the button that says get started now, there's kind of an order form. And if you click on the PayPal link, you can actually sign up for a PayPal credit line, right? Which, well, if you want to join this program and you don't feel like you have kind of the funds for it right now, just go and click on that PayPal link and it'll give you an option to sign up for PayPal credit and you can pay back the money to them with no interest for up to six months. And so, yeah, there's really no reason if you feel like this resonates with you, if you feel like this is right for you, if you feel like you're tired of being stuck and you really want to push through and get to a space where you can really welcome and attract the man and the relationship that you want in your life, then my suggestion is that you click through and sign up for the program. And so that's all I'm gonna say on that. Let's jump into question and answer. Um, so, uh, yeah. So who has some questions here that they want us to answer about their situation? If you've got a question, throw it out there. Let's see, man, there's so many comments in here. All right, values, path life has changed. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. So Helena, Helena. Yes. You're still there? Yeah, I can see the comments that you had. I've been talking a lot, so I just wanted to kind of make sure you're still alive and still here with us. Yeah, I can see the comments. I haven't been looking at them. Yeah, so we don't have any comments right now. If you do have a, or any questions right now, if you do have a question, um, then, um, so the first question is from Melanie, and she asks, does this program help us to put ourselves out there so men know that we are single? Yes, the answer is yes. Absolutely, yeah. And it's the way, it's all about the way you do it. It's about like uncovering your authentic self, like, you know, who you truly are so that the right man for you sees you, knows he's interested, knows he wants to be with you right off the bat. Like I mentioned, it's not about doing, it's about being. And yes, absolutely. All right, yeah, absolutely. So next question is from Cheryl, and Cheryl asks, how are things different with distance? Meaning like a long distance relationship? Yeah, I think that's what she's talking about, is she's trying to figure out how, kind of a connection or how working with a man is different from a long distance standpoint. Yeah, that's a great question. We get so many questions about long distance relationships, like unbelievable. I don't know if it's just because of like global economy or just people, you know, meeting online and things like that, yeah. I like to think of it as like everything is energy. If you have your, one example, you have your focus on a man, your laser focused on him, if you have him as like the goal or the prize in your mind or if you have him up on a pedestal, he can feel that, he can feel that in your energy, he can feel it in the tone of your voice or sometimes it's just somewhere in our eyes or somewhere in our energy field and the distance doesn't matter, he can absolutely feel that and it will keep him at a distance or keep him from wanting to take the relationship to the next level. There's so many things with long distance, you know, like do you have a, is there a plan for the progression of the relationship? Is there a plan for you, the two of you to live closer together? You know, what are the expectations set up in that relationship around the amount of contact that you need of the two of you exclusive? There's so many factors long distance. This is also where coaching is really helpful because I can get into, you know, once I have all those specifics of your situation, I can really, you know, get in there with you and work some of these things out. But yeah, in general, this, all of this work and the whole, you know, feminine energy methods and principles apply to long distance as well, I believe, because a man can feel it in your energy when your laser focus on him or when you're embodying some of these beliefs and this mindset. Yeah, absolutely. And I think there's also kind of this, this, these different commitment aspects, right? And there's these kind of different routines and systems that you need to have with a man if you're in a long distance relationship because it, you know, things can kind of blow up or fall apart very easily and quickly if you're not as, if you don't have commitment set up in the right way and if you don't have kind of routines and rituals and things that you do to make sure that you're connecting with each other and that you're getting to see each other on an enough basis like actually in person to maintain and fulfill all the needs that two people have in a relationship. And so there are some big challenges that long distance requires but they're not things that you can't work through or that you can't deal with and you can't, you know, have. So yeah, again, if you wanna join our soulmate attraction system program go click on the link in the description. Go click on the link in the description below. Okay, so next question. How long should you give space to a guy in the first few months of dating before deciding to throw in the towel? It sounds like a tough situation. Yeah, well, again, the details are important here. What's been happening, you know, what I would suggest is stop doing all of those things that push him away. So stop initiating contact constantly, stop reaching out, stop trying to make things happen. And basically I don't know the situation really if you're not in a relationship with this guy you should ideally your energy should be open to other men for sure whose energy is coming towards you. And the idea is it's not about waiting like just the thought of waiting on a man like, oh, it just like feels terrible. So you don't wanna wait at all. Like basically you're moving forward with your life. You're taking steps towards your dream relationship with or without him. And if a man decides that he wants to be on that journey with you, you just imagine yourself like walking across a bridge at the end of the bridge is your, you know, lifelong committed relationship. Either that man's gonna wanna jump on that bridge with you or not. So it's not about waiting a certain amount of time. It's about you're moving forward with or without him. Which is by the way, very attractive, right? It's a very attractive quality. So, you know, the right man for you is not going to stay away for very long. He's gonna wanna make sure that he gets in your life. So he doesn't lose you to another man. If a man gets the sense that he, you know, you'll just be waiting around for him forever. There's no reason for him to make a decision. There's no, there's just no reason for it. There needs to be a little bit of urgency on the man's part to get back in touch with you and take you off the market, right? Yeah, you know, it sounds like there's a lot more going on in that situation that then we're kind of getting, you know, she just said, I stopped texting and calling. I've been the initiator and felt like he needed to step up, right? And yeah, I mean, there's a lot of stuff. If a man's pulling away, you know, even if it's kind of in the initial phases, it's not as simple. That's why that's another reason why doing like one-on-one work and coaching work is so important is because, you know, this, every situation is different, right? Your situation is unique. You've had kind of things that built up to this, right? It didn't just happen all of a sudden out of nowhere. There were signs, there were indicators that maybe you didn't see, but that, you know, we would see if we were talking to you about your situation as it was going on. And, you know, if you have a coach that's taking you through that, you know, it's a lot easier to have that coach help you kind of navigate the waters so that you can end up in the right space that you want to be with the man that you want instead of ending up in a situation where he's pulling away and then you're freaking out and going, oh my God. And then you look at it and maybe it's too late. You know, I don't know what your situation is. It kind of really depends on a lot of things that happened before this. And so, yeah, if you, like I said, join, if you think this is right for you, if you want some one-on-one coaching and you want to, you know, if you're tired of being stuck, if you're tired of feeling frustrated, go click the link below and check out the offer page and see if this program is right for you and sign up because you're awesome. Okay, so let's see, other questions, what do we have here? What is the first step to change your inner beliefs, changing your story? What do you have to say about that, Helena? I love that question, that is so great. The first step, like I mentioned, I don't know if you were here for this part, it's not about undoing your beliefs, it's about changing the habit of the thought. So the first step is awareness, that's the first step to turning anything around. So what are you telling yourself? You know, write down some things that you've been telling yourself and how can you shift that story in a way that makes you feel better? So it's just a, you have to tell a story that shifts your emotion as you tell it. So like I mentioned, you're just reaching for a little bit of relief. You know, I'm getting pretty good at this. Other people are in relationships so that's evidence that it's absolutely possible for me too. And like I mentioned in the fourth one, don't get too specific, back up and just be really, really general. And it's just about changing the habit of that thought. So if you are telling yourself that you're not good enough or that there's no good men out there, it's just catching it, that's the awareness and telling yourself something that feels a little better that you can, that you actually believe right now. And then your beliefs will start to shift as you start telling yourself a new story and breaking the, it's like a pattern interrupt, breaking the pattern of that thought. Yeah, and I just want to mention that awareness really is the first step. And a lot of times it's difficult to even see it, right? Like we talked about earlier, it's like if you want to see the picture, sometimes it's really hard if you're inside the frame. And so, you know, which is another reason why coaches are so valuable. You know, one of the things that I've done a lot of times in my kind of coaching practices, I'll get deep into what's going on with you and figure out like, you know, what are those beliefs, what's going on there? You know, like what's really stopping you and then kind of narrowing it down and then, you know, putting together a game plan to fix it and break those beliefs and form new beliefs, new mindsets, new habits that actually serve you in your life and your quest to, you know, have this amazing, wonderful relationship that you really want. And so, if you want somebody to help you, go down and click the link in the description and check out our coaching program. It's really awesome. Gonna say that forever. Okay, so what else we got here? How do I cope with long distance? We were just talking about that pretty in depth. It's a, there's a lot of different components that you need in order to cope with long distance. And one is kind of rituals and habits and kind of routines that you do with a man and there needs to be a certain level of commitment that you have. And there has to be a lot of different things like, you know, meeting up and times when you meet up and kind of set kind of schedules because things can really, like I was saying before, things can fall apart pretty quickly. At some point, we're gonna be doing a whole video series on long distance relationships. So, how often, how long will you be doing the program? So, right now it's a running program. It's if we're gonna allow 15 people into it. And when it's full, it's full until people are out of it and then we will allow more people back into it. So, it kind of depends on how many people sign up. Let's see. Chaotic Kim, ha ha, Chaotic Kim asks, how do we show a man we appreciate him without being mushy? I feel so mushy weird telling a man I appreciate certain things. I know men supposedly love it, but I feel weird doing it. That's an awesome question, I love that. Yeah, just a simple thank you that feels so good. It goes a long way. Men really gravitate towards people and experiences and situations that make them feel appreciated and they avoid people and situations that make them feel incompetent. I always talk about in my videos and newsletters and stuff that men, they wanna know that what they do makes you happy especially if he's a masculine energy man who really cares about you. He's gonna wanna know that he makes you happy, it makes you feel good. So yeah, just a simple like wow thank you when you took care of that. I just felt so incredible. It feels so nice to be able to relax and not have to think about it. Whatever it is that he did that you appreciate. Just try it, just try it. That's the fuel that's gonna drive him in the relationship, that acknowledgement and appreciation. You don't have to grovel and go overboard. Just a simple like one sentence, one sentence thing. You'll love it. And one thing I wanna throw in there about that is just practice doing it with everybody, right? Do it, practice doing it when you're at the store. Practice doing it with your friends. Practice doing it over the phone with people that you know, right? Just everybody loves appreciation. I don't know anybody that doesn't love appreciation especially if it's their love languages, words of affirmation, they really love appreciation. And so just get used to just saying things, just appreciating people and doing it in a genuine way. And the more you do it, the more confident you'll feel doing it, right? And eventually it'll be like, oh yeah, you'll see something and you'll latch onto it and you'll be like, oh yeah, I really appreciate that. I really appreciate this. And for some people, me in particular, right? I grew up in an environment where we didn't kind of appreciate each other. Everybody was just sarcastic and kind of mean to each other. My family growing up. You wanna hear about my dysfunction? Let me tell ya. And I learned kind of the value of appreciation when I was in college. And I didn't know the value of appreciation before college. Before college it was, I kind of had this mindset that I think I inherited from my parents where it was like, I believe that if you did what you're like something good or something nice that it was just expected of you. And so you don't deserve appreciation for it, right? And I didn't understand that people really liked appreciation that much and all kinds of things. And so I've had to develop it. And that's one of the ways that I started doing it was I just started talking to people and I'm not great at it. I've never been great at it, but people love it. I think Helena liked my appreciation at the beginning of this video. Didn't she like it, Helena? Yeah, yeah. Helena's awesome, she's amazing. She's definitely the heart and the soul of our YouTube channel here and everybody loves her and she's wonderful and amazing. And they like her a lot more than me, so. No, I don't know about that, but. Seriously, now we're getting all warm and gushy, but seriously, I mean, Helena is, she's awesome and she's come on a few journeys with me and I really could never have done all the stuff that I've been doing with this business and our YouTube channel and everything without Helena. And so I just really appreciate her being here and being a part of this and being so on board with everything. So thank you, Helena. Oh my God, you're awesome. Yeah, that feels like amazing to hear. And even just like this is so much fun, this is truly my passion and I love our community. So we always have so much fun doing these live streams and hearing from you and getting that immediate feedback. And yeah, and to answer this woman's question, if all you did in life were just to look around you and look for things to appreciate, that's all you need to do to get into this state of allowing that we talked about in belief number one. That's it, just literally just keep a notebook or type it into your phone. These are the list of things I appreciate. Just every little tiny thing you appreciate. It's really, really amazing. That will just, it trains yourself into this place where everything you want and just show right up in your life. Pretty amazing. Yeah, and so let's see, what else do we have here? What do you think are the best ways to enjoy single life? How do you make the most of single life when you were single? It's an interesting question. How do you enjoy your life? Do you have anything you wanna say about this, Helena? Yeah, I don't know. The first thing that popped into my mind is that if it doesn't feel good on your way to it, it's not gonna feel good when you get there. I have this one client, some of my clients met their husbands on like the very first online date was their future husband or their fiance or whatever, because we did so many weeks of this mindset work. Some people are just ready to jump right in and start dating, have this one client who met her husband. He was like the 21st guy that she met online. She just did these coffee dates, these quick first dates. And something that always, she's in a lot of my live trainings and stuff. She always says, I started just, I started having fun with it. I started feeling really feminine and sparkly and I just kind of found ways to have fun with it. And that's always kind of stuck with me. You have to have fun on your way there or it's not gonna feel good when you get there. If you're looking for your soulmate because you feel this gap within yourself, you're trying to like feel this void between you and you, something that only you can fill within yourself, being in a relationship is only going to exaggerate that discord. If you've ever met a man when you're not at a place where you feel really aligned and you feel like you're at a good place, it might feel good at the beginning, but over time I can pretty much guarantee it just exaggerates the discord you're feeling within yourself. So yeah, have fun with it. And the way to do that is by releasing your attachment to the outcome or the results of any interaction you have with the man. When you're putting so much weight on these interactions, like, well, this needs to go perfectly. Otherwise, that means that I'm never gonna get what I want. You're placing all this importance on these interactions. It takes the fun out of it and it gets you into this urgent place. So yeah, just release your attachment to the outcome of any interaction and just have fun with it. It'll supercharge this process and make it happen much more quickly for you. Well, that was a much better answer than what I had, so. That was a good one. Yeah, I knew it was gonna be better too. So that's good. We'll just move on to the next one. So what else do we have here? Oh, I've been implementing a lot of your texting advice. I'm guessing you're talking about my texting advice. It's more gradual than I like. That happens pretty often. Yeah, because I really think it's because he's not as much of a talker as I'm used to. Interesting. How do I find the balance between patience and leaning back and letting things unfold and knowing that things are going nowhere? That's a good question. That's a great question. Can you repeat it? That broke up a little bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So this is all from Cheryl. And what she asked is, how do I find the difference or the balance between patience and leaning back and letting things unfold and knowing that things are going nowhere? Such a great question. Patience is something I personally struggle with. Right, and that can probably tell you. I'm an impatient person. So a lot of the stuff that I teach, it's like I teach it because it helps me myself. I heard this great quote. This is in one of my earlier videos. It's what true patience is, is knowing that you want it and knowing that it's coming and actually enjoying the unfolding along the way. Kind of speaks to the last question of how to have fun with it, right? So when you're starting to feel impatient, a lot of times it's because your masculine energy, we all have both masculine and feminine energy, it's going unemployed in other areas of our life. And that's when we tend to wanna turn it onto a man and start to feel things like this is going nowhere. How do I get this to go somewhere, right? It's a big clue that your masculine energy is going urgent and needs something else to do that has nothing to do with this man. So what else, what can you do with your masculine energy? Where can you use it and work or in raising kids or in other areas of your life? So then when you're with a man, you can, like you said, switch to your feminine energy, lean back and create that space for him to step up. That's what I would say. That combined with, if you go with that bridge analogy where you're moving forward with your life, you're not waiting around for a man. Nothing turns a guy off faster than this, like, well, I'm just gonna wait around forever for you. Or that desperate, like, I'll do anything to be with this guy, right? So you have to trust that if he's the right man for you, he's gonna wanna jump on that bridge with you. So he doesn't lose you to someone else. I truly believe that for you. He's the right guy. He's not going to jeopardize his, he's not gonna jeopardize his opportunity to be with you. Especially if he sees you as this super high value woman, right? Mm-hmm, yep. And he's afraid that you're going to not stay, which, you know, he should be. He should be. And it's not hard for a guy to start recognizing that if you're doing the right things and you kinda have the right mindsets in place because it'll start becoming very, very evident to a man. And he'll look at you and he'll be like, wow, she's amazing. By far the best woman that I've ever met in my life that I've ever dated, that I've ever seen, and I wanna keep her. And so I'm gonna do whatever I have to in order to keep her because, you know, let's be honest. Most women that most guys meet out there are kind of like, it's kind of this bland feeling, especially these days, because of kind of the hookup culture and a lot of the other things that we have going on where a lot of women are really kind of devaluing themselves, devaluing, you know, kind of the sacred experience of having sex with another person and, you know, jumping into a lot of women are jumping into these relationships and committing themselves to men who aren't committing to them, you know, and, you know, the whole swipe thing and all that kind of stuff. It's really making it challenging. It's really for guys. Most guys when they're out meeting women, it's like there's not, it's like, ugh, you know, it's not like this, like, oh, I'm really excited about this woman and I'm really excited about that woman. Obviously, that does happen. You know, we still have millions of men getting married in America every year and, you know, there's plenty of people that are figuring out the right things to do and there's lots of, you know, clients of ours. Yeah. Mention the clients. Yeah, so if you, again, again, you know, if you want to jump in our coaching program and you want to find out what's going on with you, you know, go and hit the link down in the description below and check out our system, our soulmate attraction system and Helena will do a great job of figuring out what's going on with you and help you get into the soulmate relationship you want. So I think that's wrapping it up for the time that we have today. So I just want to thank everybody for being here with us. Everybody that's here, you're awesome. It's amazing how many people that we get that come to these videos that we do and, you know, I'm hoping that you get a lot of value out of them from what I hear. A lot of people have been seeming to get a lot of value out of a lot of the things that we talk about. And so thank you so much for being here. Thank you for being the best part of our community. Like I said before, if you want to join the soulmate attraction system, if you're tired of being stuck, you know, go and hit the link below. And thank you, Helena, for being here because you're awesome. And yeah, so is there anything else you wanted to say? Just, yeah, just thanks for staying all the way till the end if you're still watching this. I would love to work with you personally and like I think I mentioned, this is probably the only way to, or it will be the only way to work with me personally for at least for a little while or, you know, we want 15 people in this program. So that would, once it fills up, it's gonna, we're gonna have to wait for people to finish it before, you know, whatever. So I'm gonna just devote my whole like working life to this group of women for the next 12 weeks and I'm super excited. I would love to work with you if these concepts resonated with you and you're really ready to attract your soulmate relationship. And I would definitely love to work with you, I'm really excited about this program. All right, well, thank you everybody. And we will talk with you again soon.