 Hey there friends, how's it going? My name is Kevin and today we're playing The Binding of Isaac Rebirth. I bought this game when it came out and I never really played it for some reason. Even though I've seen a lot of it, maybe it just reminded me too much of my childhood. There's a lot of similarities there and, uh, I don't know, a lot of, a lot of repressed memories. Oh god, the screams. The terrible, terrible screams. And so much yogurt for some reason. Yogurt everywhere. Anyway, do it. Play video games to distract myself. Ooh, hurt myself today to see if I can still feel. Alright, just a heads up. Okay, I know these games have intense followings, but, uh, I'm not gonna be good at this. And that's just a fact. So if you're here for tips and tricks, you're at the wrong place. You must be new. Okay, so just like any game I play, I move, I attack, I bomb, and I steal. This should be easy. Yep, just like any game I play, Sims comes to mind. Okay, that hurts. Should have probably understood that without having to walk on spiky objects. You know what? I should probably just die. I've got off to a bad start. Hold on, kill me. Hold on, kill. Kill. Alright, at least now I've set the barrel low. I died immediately. I lasted about 15 seconds that run, so at least that's my worst run over. And I got mom's perfume in my eye. Oh god, I'm just thinking about the yogurt again. I don't understand what I did. It just blocked one of my eyes. Oh yes, the poop room, of course. Again, it's just too much like my childhood. I understand why I didn't play this game. Kevin, your father's done in the poop room. You need to clean it. Oh mom. Oh no, I'm a monster. Oh my god, I'm not ready for a boss fight. I'm not ready for a fight. I'm not ready for a boss. I've never had a boss. I've always been self-employed. And I just, I don't feel like I'd be able to respect their authority or be competent. So I'd probably have fired immediately. Is this good? I just found bombs. Oh, I found out how to use them. Oh, I'm doing well. Well, I don't know if you could say well, but I'm doing. Oh god, no, I'm not doing anymore. I'm dead. I feel like I should have looked for more stuff before going into a boss fight. But that's okay, because now I can see that I found my glasses. Double shot. Okay, perfect. What is that? Is that his smile? Is he just really happy or does he have like an overbite all of a sudden? This is fantastic. I love this game now. Why did I ever get lasik? Glasses are the way to go. I miss being able to double shoot when I had glasses. What's this? I don't know what this is. Okay, I'm going to leave that behind. Someone's going to get angry at me because I didn't pick that up. Oh, no, it's the poop room again. Oh, the memories. The PTSD. It's all coming back. Okay, I'm ready for a boss fight because I have spectacles now. Oh, it's a different boss fight. It's Larry Jr. God, I don't want to see Larry senior. Is there a pattern? I don't, I don't understand. I think I'm winning. I think he's playing snake. He's just going in circles. He's running in circles and pooping everywhere. It's just like a pet. Why am I killing him? People pay good money to get pets, you know. All right. Well, now he's meat. Oh, look at mama's cankles. Wait, what? Oh, no. What's this? Oh, am I going to lose my glasses? Oh, my glasses. Oh, no. I got glasses back. Turns out just because I found new pants doesn't mean I have to take off my glasses. I thought we were playing strip of binding of Isaac and I could have to take off a layer. Oh, another boss room. This time I have glasses and pants. I cannot be defeated. It's this fella for earlier. He doesn't have a chance. Especially if he's crushing his minions like that. I don't even understand what's happening. Like, I don't understand what's happening in general in this game, but he's just throwing out balls at me. Okay, he exploded and I got his tooth. I don't know what this store is. It's got a demon on the top. I don't know if it's a good idea. I'm going down into the basement. That's my safest base. I like basements. I'm used to them. Oh, God damn it. The enemies keep changing and I just don't know what to expect. Even the door was my enemy there. He hurt me. So is that a risk-reward thing? Like, it hurt myself to go in and out of there, but I did get hurt so I guess it was worth it. Like, it's weird. I guess everything is just random every time because some enemies are awful and really difficult to deal with. And I didn't get a level like this and those are just slugs pooping themselves. And he's just kind of killed them. Like, look at this compared to the last one. Jesus Christ. They have a bone to pick with me. Humor is the best defense. Specifically, horrible, horrible lame dad humor. Ah, yeah, mature coral rice. Jesus, the game knows me well. Okay, these are more poop slugs, but for fuck's sake. But they had a head on either side, so I didn't know which side to avoid. Oh, ooh, a lovely shop. Wait, no, I didn't want to gamble. Oh, I just donated a coin. I don't have the kind of money. Can I take it back? Of course I can't. I just gave another one. I think the shopkeeper's dead. Can I just break the machine? Second lame shop. I'm out of here. See you. Oh, another boss fight. I don't think I'm ready for this, but you know what? Pull up your big boy pants, adjust your glasses, and let's go. Oh my God. No amount of adjusting your glasses can prepare you for this. Ah, ah, my glasses. My glasses. I can't be seen without my glasses. They keep hurting me with that crappy attack. Oh no, I'm gonna die, aren't I? I think I should just try and kill this thing sooner rather than later. No, how do I avoid that? No, no, no, no, no, no. I had it this close to death. Dear diary, today I died. I was killed by this thing in some cave. That's a good drawing. A bit mean to put in the ugly thing underneath it, though. Poor Isaac. He didn't deserve this ending. He deserves better than me. I feel like my stuff was really good as well, but maybe it wasn't. It did feel like I got really lucky. You know, luck of the Irish and all that. The thing about luck of the Irish is I think it is really a give and take game. Like, you get lucky in a video game, life hits you with a car. It's always give and take. Oh, I wonder what it'll take for me for getting this. What is this? The peeper. Okay, I thought it was a monocle. I don't know if I'm happy about this upgrade. Then again, if life is removing one of my eyes and it's all give and take, I should get something really good. My eye is not helping me at all. It's just running away. And if that's my eye, and my eye is doing nothing for me, I can't be trusted. And if I can't trust I, as in myself. Oh God. Let's just go to the next room. This is getting too confusing. Like, what's it doing? It's doing nothing for me. I don't think it's a great fucking upgrade, to be honest with you. Oh God, they're trapping me in with a poop ball. I should have seen a coming. Those bastards. Okay, my eye did something for me, and now I've stem cells over my other eye. Why didn't you put it on the bad one? All right, this is fine. What do you say, conjoined twin? It's not fine. I thought I had my eyes back for a second there. Eye was excited. Glasses. I have no eyes. What are they gonna do for me? Okay, great. He puts them on anyway. I'm finding dingles. I'm not too excited about this, to be honest. Why is he singing? He's summoning more poop. Oh no, he's running, which I just really don't like even saying that, to be honest. Okay, at least he's defeated. Give me those hearts. I'm not feeling too good. Oh, underpants. Thank God. Oh, it's mom's underwear. Okay, I put it on anyway. What an outfit. No eyes, glasses, and mom's underwear. It's gonna be a fun day. What the hell is that? I walked into fire just for a cool bracelet. Wait, what the hell? Okay, I think this is good actually. This looks devastating. Oh yeah, this is fantastic. I don't even have to worry about accuracy anymore. What is this? Soy milk. Oh, great. Oh my Jesus. Is this a time thing or does this last forever? Okay, it does seem weaker, but again, I don't have to worry about accuracy at all. Jesus, it's like a machine gun. Mom's toenail. Oh, great. That'll go great with... Oh wait, what the hell? She just tried to smush me. All right, you can have your toenail back. I'll take the ringworm. I don't know how to get over here. I wish I did, because I really want this heart especially. I guess I'll just keep going. I must be driving so many Isaac players insane. They're just screaming at their screen, but honestly, the sooner you learn that I cannot be helped, the better. A lot of people had to learn that the hard way. Ooh, what's this? Oh, I have no money. This has been great. It's good to see you're doing better though. You're no longer dead. You're just waiting for death. I'm not ready for a boss fight, but I have no... Let me Google how to fucking get over gaps. How to get over grief. No, how to get over gaps. Some bombing rocks can make paths. How do I... What? I just triggered puberty somehow. How did I do this and how come my eyes came back? Whose eye is that then? God, puberty's been rough. You might notice hair where you didn't have hair before. I just mean your head. You've grown four hairs. Alright, time for a boss battle. Now that I've reached puberty, I think that I know everything about the world and I can do anything I want, including beat Chubb once and for all. Oh God. Oh God, Chubb wants to eat me. The thing is, he looks so friendly. I think he must be going through a confusing period in his life as well. I'm trapped in the corner, but he laid off me. That was mercy, but I won't show Chubb any mercy. I will get rid of this Chubb. Yes, my Chubb is gone. Oh, Mama's lipstick. I am at that age where I can start using makeup, right? Look at how far I'm getting. I'm on the fourth level. Oh no. Oh no, the fourth level is scary. Hey, little fella. Dark bum, he wants to take your life. Why do I want him on my side? I mean, keep your enemies close and all that, I guess. No, no, no, no. Dude, please, please. I, I, I want those. I mean, there's no way I can cross anyway, but still. Oh, oh life. Yeah, give me life. Yes, I love this shop. Good to see you're thriving in this economy, buddy. That is not fucking worth it. I, I, no, I'm just leaving. Oh my God, big room, big room, big room. I don't, do not want. There's too much going on here. I don't understand. This is fucking just stressful. Look at how much room I have to dodge these. What's this? Medication. Eat it without reading the label. Can I, will I use it? Range down. I don't want that. The hell is this? Oh my God. What's going on? Great, I found more medication. Let's just eat this. Oh my God. The bombs, the horrible bombs. I'm getting nan flashbacks. Oh, they almost killed me for fuck's sake. I don't even know where I'm supposed to go. Great, I found the boss fight, but at what cost? I may as well run to the shop, I guess, and just see if I can afford anything. I don't think I can. Look at all those. I wish I could get them. Could my eye just grab them or something? Any of them? You couldn't give me a friendly discount, could you? You have no foot traffic. No one else is going to buy this, whatever it is. All right, fine. I got to go into a boss fight with one heart. Fantastic. All right, here goes nothing, and I mean nothing. Like how am I supposed to beat Mega Fatty? I struggle with Chob. Never mind Mega Fatty. Oh my God, he's farming everywhere. He's farming everywhere. Okay, Mega Fatty battle is actually going pretty okay. Surprisingly. I think my long range is really helping me here. Oh my God, I beat Mega Fatty with one heart and little Chubby has appeared in the basement, whatever that means. Oh, hearts and drugs. This is what I want. Damage plus range up, perfect. We're on to the final little level here, the final rectangle, and it gave me a heart. I'm in depths one. I'm scared. Oh, happy rainbows came out of the poop. That's nice. Oh, how do I free him, the poor little fecker? No, I'm sorry, buddy. I don't know what to do. All right, there's something in here. Is it worth going in through the damaged door? No, I'm going to leave it. It's not worth it to me. Oh, yes, an extra foot. I would prefer the helping hand, but I'll take a foot. My luck went up. Along with luck of the Irish, now I have luck of the foot. A common saying. Oh, I might buy that life. Give me that, give me that. I want to live. I think I'm doing actually okay for once. I'm like this loser. I feel a little bad. He looks lost and afraid. He reminds me of myself. I found the boss room. I think I'm ready to just go for it. I, oh, wait, there's bombs in there. Yes, let me in. All right, now I'm ready to just go for it. Gertie Jr. Wait, I thought I beat him. No, I beat Larry Jr., right? Oh, God. Oh, sweep of Jesus, they're fast. Okay, one of them is dead and this one's going off screen luckily enough. Oh, this one is stressful. They're too fast. Okay, thank God. Okay, I think I'm actually leaving with more life than I entered. I might be completely wrong though. Okay, I'm on to skull level, which I mean in the past, skull level usually means bad, skull bad. Oh, for fuck's sake. It's like, how was I supposed to know he was going to do that? What's this? I'm afraid to pick up anything, but I started with two eyes. Then I was down to one eye, then no eyes, then two eyes, then three eyes, now four eyes. Oh, the poor little factor. No, I'm still not saving you. Sorry. Okay, this seems a little unfair. Jeez, it's getting really difficult at parts. And I think the worst part is like with a lot of enemies, I just don't know what's going to happen. So I don't know how to react. Oh, wait, wait, wait. I think I get it. I gotta kill them, and then they turn into slime, and then I kill the slime. Okay, I didn't understand, and they just kept respawning, and they hurt me so much. God damn it. You see what I mean? What the hell is that? What the? I'm gonna die because of that, aren't I? Oh, for fuck's sake. Maybe that was a good thing. I need to find a shop really bad, and I'm gonna die. Oh, God damn it. Oh, my dad joke came back to bite me. He had a bone to pick with me after that joke. You can't just use the same joke. It doesn't work. All right, well, goodbye, cruel world. This was really fun though. I really enjoyed it. Like, I was getting really into it in that last run. I really, really wanted to win it. I have a feeling I'm gonna get addicted to this game. It's gonna be the next idle breakout. But I hope you enjoyed the video. If you want to see more, please do let me know. And if there's any old gems like this, let me know because I've missed out on a lot. You know, I call myself a gamer, but really I just have no life and never go outside. Not the same thing. But I hope you enjoyed. If you want to see more of me, I post every day. I also stream over on Twitch. Check that out. Link in the description. But other than that, I just thank you for watching. Appreciate you. And hope to see you next time. Bye for now.