 Thanks for staying with us now. Having good communication skills can help you uncover your needs and those of others that will enhance understanding and empathy and also help you set strategies that are more effective in creating actual change. And transformative communication is for anyone who wants to improve their relationships with the aim of bringing more awareness and harmony to their relationship. It is aimed at both groups and individuals and can be used on a professional level. So today we're asking how can we ensure transformation through communication. Now please let's share what you have to say. Remember you can join the conversations and there's an SMS or what's up to rate one is your 34663. You can also do that as a ratio after one, the hashtag ratio. I'm just going to do it in one second because I have two guests to bring in now. You know you are the communication person. So how have you translated, what's it called, the skills that you have through communication? How has it transformed you as a person and people around you? Well, I'm very big on communication and I think that when the objective for you is, you do not just want to have communication for the sake of just speaking. You truly want to communicate with the other person and you truly want it to be transformative. Then it goes to influences how you communicate to people in terms of your language, in terms of the fact that you're speaking to people, you're open to feedback, you're open to understanding your thought process, you're open to listening, not for the sake of being defensive or arguing, but truly trying to understand where they are coming from. In that space, when you have transformative communication for me like that, I have benefited from the fact that people usually let down their guard and they are more open to speaking to you from a place of empathy, from a place of honesty, not necessarily because you have also attacked them and then they feel like they need to bear their guards up and then reply back the same way that you have come at them. So yeah, really transformative communication for me has influenced the language, my nuance, my body language, bringing all my communication skills to bear every time I need to speak to somebody, engage people, whether at an individual or at a group level. Okay, NJ, you want to add to that? No? I love you here again, Distinguished Master Kubiyanga is a writer and communication consultant. He is an immediate past president, married to Toastmaster Sikedra Program Quality Director and Division Director-Elect, Division F and Co-Chair Education and Training Committee District 94. I have no idea what all of those things are. The Toastmaster message judge, Iqbafi, is an award-winning tech evangelist, Agile coach with impeccable analytic skills, proficient in data analytics, Agile's from Kanban, business analysis, project management and digital marketing. She's the chairperson of Media, Publicity and Branding of Nigerian Toastmasters Conference and the founder of Lento, I think, I believe. And they've joined us live in studio. So when you see all these Toastmasters people, I'm not wondering why it's not my fan. I'm not the one hosting the show today. So I just want to take a break. Well, hey, thank you so much for joining us this evening. Thank you so much for having us. All right, so this conversation, first of all, because Mondays are dedicated to us governance leadership, right? We must first of all find a way. Is it possible for us to start to have transformative, transformative style of communication amongst our leaders? If it is possible, how do they even start? Because I think there's a big gap when it comes to communication and Nigerian leadership. If you would agree. If not, tell me why not. Let's go in first. Okay, maybe I actually mentioned it to him. The way you waved your hand with regards to the world's soft city and the lack of communication with the government and the citizens. There's a massive lacuna. And it is possible. You learn how to speak. There's a reason we have two years and one month. The goal is to listen more. And the only organization that I believe that gives you that kind of platform is those masters. I'll let him speak to that. But I totally agree that transformative communication is a game changer. Donald Trump did it. He was engaging with the people. Every step of the way, he was having conversation. But our government feel there is no need to have conversation. But they did have conversation when answers happened. So it's impossible to have transformative communication with people. It's important to have a dialogue. Don't feel that you have to be backed into a corner. Peter, we did that. He was engaging, communicating with the people. So Toastmaster is that organization that they love you to go out and pay public speakers, motivational speakers. It gives you where you learn how to speak effectively and how to lead. Because once you can speak effectively, you can lead. You can become a better leader. You will be definitely transformed leader through the way you communicate with the people that you work with and lead with influence. So I'll let him speak, my distinguished Toastmaster Kubi, to speak on the value. It's something you earn years of working and offering your service as a Toastmaster. You are honored with Distinguished Toastmaster. Before Distinguished Toastmaster comes in, I just want to add that I am a product of Richmond Dio Johnson. His leadership, his mentorship, he saw me a diamond in the rough and said, I see you beyond who you are as a person and I want to invest. And I see this because I know how much he also impacted a lot of leaders in Nigeria. Governors, senators, he was always helping them to guide how they communicate. And they became better leaders, right? They were more empathetic to the ones they were governing. So just to allude to what you were saying, that truly it can make you different. But let me come to you, Distinguished Toastmaster. Thank you very much. Isidro, I'll start from here. Everything rises and falls on leadership. And I can take it forward that communication, effective communication is the language of leadership. Now there are many instances dotted in history where effective communication led to positive transformation. The inspiring speeches of Winston Churchill that galvanized the British war efforts and ultimately led to the victory of the Allies in the World War. This is just one situation. I mean, I have a dream speech. So everything that any human being wants is on the other side of effective communication. So anyone who wants to go somewhere, has a dream, wants to achieve anything, must first learn to communicate effectively. Because that is what precedes the transformation that you seek. Absolutely. Okay, so for me, you know, I know about, I have been apart in due to association. We all have been. Yes, due to association to Toastmasters. And I'm here this evening actually to learn more and to see how, you know, some of these qualities that, you know, you both possess can be, you know, transmitted into other people through, you know, the television, those listening, and what needs to be done to get to that point where we can actually communicate effectively. And why do I say that? If we keep saying we are the leaders of tomorrow, and at this point, we haven't started to learn the skills and the qualities that we require in order to communicate effectively and become better leaders, how do we prepare ourselves and how are we ready when, you know, the opportunity arises? And that is why, you know, we are interested in an avenue like this to be able to get value for, you know, for just knowledge to get ourselves better and better positioned for opportunities so that when these opportunities do arise, we are able to rise up to that location and take the boat by the home. If I can speak experientially, I always say I'm nearly 50 years old. I wish. I knew. Actually, I'm 15 extra. I wish I knew Toastmasters in my 80s, say 2030s. Why do I say that? This is one of the best organization that is out there, over 100 years old, and in 145 countries with 300,000 members. Now, this is the caveat. I always like to emphasize this. This is one organization you can't hide. You have a foul personality. You can't hide because you lead by leading. You speak by speaking, and you are speaking. Your peers are giving you feedback. So you are being evaluated and celebrated as you speak. Experientially, I saw a guy on YouTube and the way he held the audience Spellbound with a stick of seagate in his hand. He was a champion for the speech contest. And by the way, you need to know that Toastmaster is closely affiliated with all this platform. Majority of the speakers you see in the world, they are offshoot of Toastmasters. Unfortunately, Africans are not embracing Toastmasters the way it should be. This organization is beyond public speaking. It's beyond leadership. Because in the process of leading, like you talked about the RDJ, I had opportunity to meet him and it was a missed opportunity because I wish I was immersed under his mentorship. My life would have been better because I had the opportunity to walk closely. He actually brought me in to where I was working to work. I didn't know he was a Toastmasters. And now I'm figuring Toastmasters and I'm seeing the value that it brings to the table. My vocal variety is so loud. I tell people I don't need a microphone. I would naturally speak no matter how far you are, you would hear me. But learning the ability to speak, the vocal dexterity that you need to master is so critical. And because you've been given evaluation, you've been given feedback, it helps. And that's why I'm so grateful for the community because they push you to grow. So you can't be a dodgy character and be a Toastmasters because it requires work. It requires your dedication. You have to craft the speech. You have to prepare the speech. You have to deliver the speech. You have to get the feedback. You have to go back. It's like a school. It is a school. So that's the only way it can be transformative. And that's why I'm particularly excited with the play thorough of guests that we have at the Toastmasters Nigeria conference that is scheduled to hold in the next two days. Okay. So let's quickly go on a very short break. When we come back from that break out, I want to touch on something you said around why you think Nigerians are not embracing it. And I'll come to you Deola, stay with us, we'll be right back. All right. Thanks for staying with us. Now if you're just cheering in, we're discussing transformation through communication with Toastmasters Messi and Distinguished Toastmaster Kubi. Now please let's hear what you have. So remember you can join the conversation. Send us an SMS or WhatsApp to 0-8-1-8-0-3-8-4-6-6-3. You can also tweet at us at weishorafka one with the hashtag weishor. All right Deola, I want to come to you. Then I'll come back to what I was trying to point out. Okay. So interesting that, I mean, I was, when you said something about, you were going to talk about what I, maybe Nigerians had, you know, what they have a bit of a challenge, you know, being a part of the Toastmasters. I just smiled because that was a question I was going to ask. What are some of the challenges that, you know, people have when it comes to transformative communication, especially with Nigerians, you know, not being in that space, not wanting, you know, to make better their communication styles. And then, is there any way that you can help us learn, you know, how to overcome these challenges? You want to come in? Oh yes. And here's the point I want to come in. Let's know, because a lot of people don't know what Toastmasters is about. Exactly. Toastmasters clubs provide a positive and supportive environment where members are empowered to learn leadership and communication skills, which results in personal confidence and growth. So that's what Toastmasters gives people. You gain confidence and, of course, growth. And the conference we are having at the Civic Center, Victoria Island, on the 8th and 9th, is designed to show the many benefits, the transformational benefits that Toastmasters membership offers. We have conference speeches, keynote speeches, panel discussions, a debate, an Oxford-style debate, all lined up over two days, the 8th and 9th of June 2023. Is this free for people? No. So you have to pay us for deciding it. But I want to answer to your last question, because she asked why. I would ask you, if you meet a young graduate today, how do they communicate? Horrible. It's short language. They want to do something, they use S, shaking my head, S, H. They can't compete in the world that we are. And they feel that it's a very, it's travesty for me that communication has degenerated so badly. It's even worse because of the dopamine that they take on when they have a mobile phone. Because they're like this with the phone and scrolling and scrolling and scrolling. You're not learning. And so when you want to respond, you respond in short words, and that is not communication. For you to be transformed to embrace organization like this, like the Indians have done, they are predominantly Toastmasters. They don't speak in English. Toastmasters is in every 100 yards within the environment. And that's how they learn English. Because they go by speaking. Like I said, this organization is structured from the region to the district, like I just came back from Togo, then to local clubs, where you can go into a club. And being a member, this is very important. So long as you join a member, join a club, a local club, you can speak in China. You can speak in the US. Just imagine the opportunity that it provides for you. So let's keep Toastmasters aside. We have a communication problem in Nigeria, right? And I believe that where I was coming with, when you said that we had a lot of challenges, right? How do we integrate something like this starting it from primary school? I remember we used to go on debates. We used to do a lot of things. Some of these things have died. The idea of short codes when texting, I can't do that because I always feel like Nigeria is going to be cringing. So he just kind of like worried it in my head that you must type your message complete. And we don't have those kinds of mentorship. Because again, I have seen what fantastic and effective communication can do to either motivate and influence an entire generation that you start to see greatness coming out of, just oozing out from everywhere. The reason we are degenerated as a people, I think I also want to tie it to also poor educational structure. And again, when somebody keeps emphasizing certain things into your subconscious and you are just there, nobody is actually even helping you to spot whatever greatness that you have inside of you. So I mean, I understand the power of words and I understand if woven together, those words can actually make a difference in the lives of millions of people, right? So if Nigerians are not embracing it, two things. And again, this was the worry I had. And I thought, I can't be sounding like you. I want to speak my PG in English. I cannot be like you. And you said to me, what? You have the freedom to be yourself, right? And you also have the freedom. But again, I think we need to find a way to localize the, what's it called, the communication, find a way to blend it in to the culture, to the local people so that they see it and they don't see it as foreign. That way, I believe they would embrace it better. I just came back from Togo. I know. French. In Tosmaster, they were speaking French. I understand. There's been French. So we had a contest where it was localized, right? Yes. You spoke Ybibyo. You spoke Pijit. You speak. We are having a club that is bilingual. Diversity. So I mean, if we start to have these kinds of things. No, we have. And we now start to imbibe speaking rights from secondary school. So we are trying. So imagine as you are now speaking to the commissioners of education across board, or let's even go to the highest kid at the minister for education. And we then trickle it down to states and say, okay, you know what? Every child, maybe from the age of five, must begin to start to do all the old people who call those things that speeches, whatever and all of that. There is no way we will not clean up an entire generation. We already have that in Tosmaster. There is something like that. You know, Tosmasters has the entry requirements of 18 years and above. But we have gavel clubs. There are affiliates of Tosmasters International. For children. Children can join gavel clubs. We found a couple of gavel clubs in Leicester. One of them is Blumas gavel club that was founded in Blooming Lights Montessori in Amole Feswan by myself. There are such things, but I understand your point of systemising it. So it's not just a spark here, another one over there to make it into something that is brought into the curriculum so that transformation can reach everybody. Yeah. But that is inclusive in terms of government participation and parents have to get involved. You see, we always tend to blame the government. Parents have a role. Now I'm speaking to you as a parent. So my daughter is 11 years old. You saw her. She gave a Tosmaster speech yesterday. Everything I'm doing, I'm carrying them alone. We can't say it's a government. Tosmaster has created the platform. Are you struggling? You have children that are struggling to communicate. They can't even express themselves. Sign them up to Tosmasters. Why you get a coach? You get mentors. You get feedback. You improve. There is no way to go through the process of Tosmaster. Your life is not transformed and you don't have to sound like RDJ. You are authentic to yourself. So parents need to get involved and role your children. This organisation helps you to grow as a leader. Helps you to improve your communication ability and the fact that it gives you a platform to network like no other. Because you meet professionals as a Tosmaster in a club. Or if you're in my club, you can go to US and your keyword is just I'm a Tosmaster. I want to deliver a speech. And we deliver a speech and you network with someone in the US. What do you think is going to happen to you? Or you go to the UK as a club virtually. I'm not saying travel. Because when you hear me say go there, it means join the club. I think this joining of club virtually COVID helps you guys. Oh yes. Because I know that it was called the new reality that came after the advent of COVID that helped a lot of clubs to start going online virtually and all of that. But I just wish that for the children, maybe it's free. It's free. The gavel is free. You mentioned that. I know I'm so full play. In Tosmas, members pay and not use each member's dollars. Does it cover the child? No, gavel clubs, they have just a yearly certification fee that covers all the members of the club. Don't speak my language. You have a human focus. Because transformation, in order for there to be success in transformation, there has to be proper communication. It's always better when it has a human focus because it will be easy to adopt. I actually love the fact that you have thought about involving individuals from when they're still young and still impressionable and you can start to affect those changes, whether in speech or in character and confidence helping them to build their self-esteem early. This all helps to get them ready earlier unlike some of us are learning in our old age but it's never too late to learn. I love the idea and definitely if we can make it for the conference while we try. It's a civic center. In two days, we are expecting the wife of the governor. We are expecting a keynote speaker. We are expecting a few commissioners. It's not about them. I want you to come and meet with professionals. You're looking for work. Come and network. You never know. You're looking to improve your leadership skill. Come and see what is done. My life was changed going to Togo. I've traveled and been to Seven Continents but going for a Toastmasters conference is like none other. Just the diversity, the opportunity, the freedom to say I am a Toastmaster, to someone that has never met with you and no guards, no heirs, and you're interacting and is not limited to just being in the club. I've come here today. You come to my club. You've come to know certain people. There's a member of my club that is a Canadian. She's in my club and she's a semi-finalist on the Toastmasters International State. This is the best school you would ever need. For leadership. When are you going to Switzerland? I want you to come here. I wanted to say, when are you going to park all this hour? Our leaders, senators, all of them, let us juke their missile to smother. We need it. Don't ever pose in this country. You want to call me? Yeah, first thing first, you cannot give what you do not have. I hear you when you say that you have programs that cater to different demographic or however, I still think that it's important that you up your awareness. People need to know as a parent, if I don't know, I can't help my child. I can't even introduce them to something like this. That becomes the Toastmasters job. Because again, looking on self-transformation, we're looking at a really in-nation-wide transformation. Well, since you guys are doing a fantastic job, I mean, you're the tip of the iceberg. You have to do much more to raise this awareness. Because people who honestly get involved in this, people need to understand how... That's why I'm trying to... I'm happy you're bringing this up and that's why I'm trying to emphasize that you see what happens with familiarity. If you introduce a brand, there's top-of-the-mind awareness. If you introduce a brand to a child, there's every likelihood that if that brand can meet the need of that child even up until old age, adulthood, that child will stick to that brand. So that's where I'm going with it and that's why it has to be free. Because we're trying to solve a problem. I'm saying to you that you have to find a way that incorporating this curriculum into classrooms for children maybe from 5 years and above it is free. So you might have to strike deals with state commissioners of education. They must understand the vision and the importance. Why we have a lot of troubled leaders today is because first of all, some of them cannot even express. They can't express what it is that they feel, how they feel about the people. They can't even express properly. You now have a lot of clash. The people are not listening to your leaders. The leaders are not communicating effectively. So imagine if we start it and we say we're on a mission to clean up Nigeria and let us even start from the young age. We start to incorporate it. If I have been taught something for like 10 years of my life maybe I started from age 5 I'm now 12 or something. There's every likelihood that upon graduation as I'm leaving secondary school I'm going to go and sign up now professionally to say you know what, I am part of this brand. So that's why I'm saying that we have to find a way to try to solve a problem here. If we want to transform life, we know that communication is one of the most effective ways to transform life. So what are we doing in terms of putting that communication where it's needed from that age? Can I comment? I would say quickly I would if they told me Toastmaster should be free I would kick against it. I'm a trainer I have a business that I train what you don't pay for you will never value I tell you that for free Toastmaster can never be free what we are paying is for not for children. I'm saying I'm coming somewhere. Like I told you the gavel club is free but someone needs to pay it's just one year's license. You're paying 50 dollars for one year for a group of 20 children that is free as a member what I'm paying for a year is 90 dollars that is the most ridiculous of prices and the reason I say this with every sense of responsibility what I pay for my hair or going to fill my phone is not close to the value that I get. Is it the resources? the slides that come with Toastmasters? Is it a networking opportunity? I'm not advocating the only area that I would say we have a gap as a Toastmaster is our marketing. Our marketing it's not great and I know we need to improve on that but in terms of the value nobody is disputing the value but let's quickly take the comments Jela and Gav, then Jela's take comments oh so I have a comment from Daniel Hilo says good evening my dear beautiful sisters of what are you saying ways transformation in communication in a nutshell my dear beautiful sister Jela made mention of two people communicating with each other to rob minds and apply solution to the system which is key your guest made mention of a good leader being recognized through his communication and she also said that that audibly I'm very key too sister Uwa said that one can be free to communicate with any language of their choice sister Uwa you said on the show that you have been stressed you are too beautiful to be stressed just relax it is well with you my name is Daniel Hilo ways regular family go ahead okay and this one is from Santos he says that your topic transformation through communication is an interesting one but my question to toastmasters is how do you make it to reach every corner and cranny of the Nigerian society you want to wrap up on that we have a minute let me speak everything starts with a seed the first toastmasters club in Nigeria was found in Victoria Island by a man the lead ambassador of Vincenzo sunny Okobi today we have about 50 clubs across the country so because it is like this today it does not mean it cannot transform better or something greater tomorrow I link that back to what you say you should be free well can I tell you a fun fact toastmasters originally did not admit women it started admitting women in 1973 and the first woman to join officially was the first international president of toastmasters distinguished toastmasters Helen Blanchard she had already been a member of the student of Huma for five years before that so you see she came in things changed maybe you can come in what happened I know my name I am coming don't worry if I did not carry me there it is a fantastic platform I have seen the lives of people around me I am very proud of everyone if you can it is an important thing to have as part of your life I love the discipline it is something you have to really be committed I have a lot of things on my plate but thank you so much distinguished toastmasters thank you for having us before we go show you photos across all social media show Africa you can interact with us further drop a comment and more follow all our engagements on social media like share and invite your families and friends to watch and follow the conversation if you missed our quote for today here it is again if you just communicate you can get by but if you communicate skillfully you can work miracles see you guys tomorrow at 8pm bring another great conversation to your screen enjoy