 Look, I'm not gonna do it! I'm Stan and I was wrong! I'm singing the Stan wrong song! I shouldn't have taken that chance! Now here's my remorseful dance! Do the kick! Jazzy! I could use some api slices, actually, if you wouldn't mind. And a little peanut butter to dip them in. Fucking of course I want peanut butter, Clint! SCP Redacted is a dollar store mascot costume by the name of Bucky and the person who inhabits it. The mascot's ventilator is broken and thus is in a constant state of deflation. And the individual inside has never responded to any name except Bucky, nor has it eaten, slept, or performed any other necessary biological function. It's easily contained as it never leaves this warehouse and is also creepy as hell. Oh no, yeah, for sure. Yeah, I totally get it. He did not get it. In fact, he had absolutely no fucking clue what was going on. I have often seen spinning a pen in my videos and a constant comment is, how often do you drop that pen and have to do retakes? Enough that I've actually dented the tip so that the pen doesn't open and close properly anymore. So between my spinning pen that I can't write with and my fountain pen which gets ink everywhere if I spin it, well, I have one functional pen total. Oh, I need to get to work, but I've got so much washing up to do. I have warned you repeatedly about keeping a clean workspace nugget. Oh, hi. What the? No! Call security! The Little Chef Entity is on the rampage! Wait, belay that order. No, you know what? I admire violence in the name of cleanliness. Approved. Drop the banana. Put officer. What banana? What are you- Naaaaaaah! We lost six good agents in that raid. What have I told you about head-on confrontations with anomalous magicians? That's right. Don't. As this D-Class will demonstrate, knocking on the mirror in this particular way will cause the mirror entities to reach out and take you. Yes, it works on any mirror. No, I don't sleep at night. My friend, did you disappear last year? Thank you so much! Best friend! Are you playing with God? I mean, if you want to go to SCP-343 cell and tell it you're canceling its poker night, be my guest, but you better have the biggest of all britches if you think you're going to tell God who it can and can't play games with. And nothing can go wrong! Site 42 reading recommendation. We do that sometimes, right? Add Absentia, a short emotional tale about a woman who doesn't know what her husband does for a living. Available in audio on the Site 42 YouTube channel. Give it a look or a listen. It's a good one. But a flat dog, however. Actually, here he is now. Hey, flat dog! He's straight from the void. There's too many anomalies. There's the VR person, the curtain, the conehead on the shelf, the flat dog, the void! Day 42 of trying to convince thee, oh, my, that the pestilence is actually... Yeah, we're not actually sure what the pestilence is yet, but we are certain that it can be cured by that drip, my dudes! This is a common misconception in ominous doorway or management. A modicum of human affection within the first seven days would have caused it to leave on its own, but you can still survive as long as you don't. The energy that we've created in the studio today. Where did I put my spaghetti tacos? No... Ah, the duct-taped diners. Now, this is an anomaly that does the opposite of what you would expect. You see the plates they have there? They're expecting you to give them a meal. And if you do give them a meal, do the generous proper thing. They thank you by pulling your skin off as if it were duct tape. You see, they're trying to be helpful. If you refuse to feed them, then the disappointed duct-taped diners just leave. And they leave you alone because you didn't help them. They're not going to help you. So, you know, you gotta disappoint them, but it's a fate better than death, I so to think. But... Hi, Dr. Sherman. Hello, yet another Connors? Yeah, I'm a Dr. Connors. Just... Wonderful, yet another reality I take it. And now, how long will you be with us? Don't worry, that's between our reality. I'll have in some form of Connors exchange program. Well, long ago. Mm-hmm, good for her. So, I'm just returning the favor and checking out yours. Do y'all have a system for telling each other apart? You can call me R-8s. It's nice to meet you. Well, this you. Oh, this is giving me cat boy dimension flashbacks. Cheers. Oh, I could really go for a drink. We don't have a test schedule for today. Both of them? All right, don't exacerbate the situation. I'm calling security. Absolute pawns. Security, I need you in the nugget wing immediately. Oh, bring a medic. Sometimes it's a heavy burden being a man of science. I know what you mean, Jimmy. That's why I decided early on to sabotage my highly scientific mind with cartoons and sugar. All swimming pools in the city have spontaneously combusted. We need a team out there ASAP. Douse it with water. The water is on fire! Begin test. I kind of feel like having a cheese toasty. And right on cue. Oh, hello. Okay. That's my little chef. Ooh, that was a very clear toasty. Language skills improving. Butter coordination needs work. Too much butter. Whoa, still not taking critique well. Also, too much butter. Excellent cheese tetris. All right. Whose idea was this testing music? This is dope. Get a little salsa going. Oh, we can put some salsa on that cheese toasty. Thank you. Now I'm hungry. Hey there, Site 42 fam. It's come to my attention that not a lot of people know that we have a Site 42 SCP merch store. We've commissioned art from multiple artists to make SCP-related merch and we've got stickers for the Site 42 channel. And so if you want some SCP merch as well as helping support the Site 42 channel, teespring.com slash stores slash Site 42. Thank you in advance and cheers.