 Your coca-cola bottle presents Claudia based on the famous play and novels by Rose Franken Brought to you transcribed Monday through Friday by your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola Relax and while you're listening refresh yourself have a coke and now Claudia Hey David, it's freezing out. It's what I just opened the door. It's freezing out Well, there's one see how cold it is all Sure, I'm winter You better drink another cup of coffee and drink it hot. Why is it so cold and I gotta put my nose on Keep it in the house where it's warm my nose. Oh I just hate you're having to put yourself outside darling goes right through you like a knife. Oh, I'll survive I'm a great big rugged outdoor man Great big outdoor man or not winter is on our doorstep thoroughly. It is almost enter at our house This is a day for folks to stay by their fire. Is that what it is? Oh, it's a nice and warm. Yeah, that's what it is No living creatures should be made to go out today. Not even termites. What do you have against termites? We don't have Doesn't that apple tree look for law or not there in the bleak that apple tree has weathered more winters than we ever will What a nasty thought darling This is not not going to budge all day so nice and warm in the house. I'm not gonna budge. I can't do tell I do Hope it's warm up at the barn too. Why don't you bring majesty down in the kitchen? It's an idea Pregnant cows should be warm, you know and and and Ruby too the cow in the South stayed up at the barn And when the winter winds blew they only said Darn because they felt so warm No David maybe the trains won't be running to New York and you won't have to go trains don't mind the weather. Well, they should I do David look quickly. See on the windowsill. Claudia. I'm trying to read the paper. You can read your paper any old time That's what you think put it down. All right. Now. What is it there on the windowsill? What do you think it is a black bear nothing but a little bird What poor little wisp of a bird? He must be freezing out there and open the window. Let him in I even went near the window. We'd fly away Oh, David. He must be starving. What earth is there to eat at this time of year for a bird grass Where berries where? nuts Where right here chattering beside me very funny and worms. Oh, I hate worms Whispered in the little birds here. You're such a fool Thank you. Seriously David wouldn't you hate being a bird in this weather most birds aren't in this weather They they flew away months ago. Well, this poor little bird didn't he got left behind all of that. That's a winter bird Some birds don't fly south for instance Farrows some rent. He looks so pathetic. It's a skimpy little feathers David his nose must be frozen his nose the birds have noses birds have built and beaks Oh, well, this poor little bird's gonna be a blue beak before the day's over. Oh, look at him hopping around. Oh If you're cold just looking at him Skinny little bird, isn't he? What is all this sudden interest in birds mrs. Auto button? I am conscious stricken Here we are sitting at this this laden breakfast table coffee toast Marmalade and the poor little bird has to skimp for respect and I mean Scrape you mean big So cold today the worms have probably gone way deep into the earth and the birds can't get out Hey, he's gone. He's probably been looking at you and shaking his head and pity I mean, I don't think you you realize how pathetic you look without your wings and landlocked and Cluttered with clothes and only two legs to get around would be nice to have wings not today though. I bet they're absolutely stiff with cold Say David, are you finished with that piece of toast? Sure, why give it to me? Hmm. Now you can make yourself a fresh piece of toast Well, I you don't have to eat the remains of mine. I Treat yourself have a fresh piece of toast for you. Go ahead. Nothing too good for you. Well, it's not for me No, you're not very nice to mama. Well, she can have a fresh piece of toast, too I wouldn't regret it. It's not for mama David. It's for the little bird with a blue beak I'm gonna crumble it into crumbs and I'm gonna spread it all over the lawn. What a sweet and generous girl I married. I know. Oh, so sweet. Well, listen, if you were a bird, how'd you feel if nobody gave you anything to eat? How do you do? If I were a bird, I'd have a bird like appetite and I could probably take care of myself Heartless that's all as well as being an absolute idiot Here it is almost Christmas. And what is all most Christmas got to do with it? Aren't you filled with the spirit of giving? I'm filled with coffee and toast. No, no, stop protesting You're filled with yuletide spirit as well. You hardly ate any toast at all since it's almost Christmas This year, we're going to remember the birds. Lady bountiful. Oh, well, what's a piece of toast to me, David? And just think what it'll mean to that poor little sparrow everything and here's this crust of bread We can give them that too. Aren't you going to butter it first? Do you think they'd like butter? Put a little fat on their feathers. You are not being very amusing Huh? There we are All in my napkin and I shall distribute it among our flock my own private little st. Francis of Assisi What? Never mind Don't you want to come out with me and feed the boys? Yeah, I think you're able to handle that job alone You just love pretending you're tough, don't you? No, I'm not pretending. I am tough. Oh, oh, yes, yes Oh, David, if you're going out you better put on your overcoat. I bet you don't believe how cold it is Well, I should by now. Oh, help me Michael. Would you David's right there? We'll just drop it on my shoulder. Now you put that napkin full of crumbs down and put on your coat properly How do you know? Little bird told me. What kind of little bird? You take your choice. Sparrow? A magpie. All right, you can hold the crumbs since you insist I button up that last button. Oh, no. Button it up. Check out my chair. Button it up. Oh, honestly, you're the bossy Isn't it alright? I'm buttoned. Gimme me crumbs. Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme me crumbs Gimme me crumbs Oh, feels like spring will never come. The weather's just begun. Oh, don't keep reminding me you know the birds all be dead by spring day we should have built the more houses that's why my soul and body you would deprive even the birds of their freedom you honest appeal if you don't lead everybody by the hand they'll get lost birds don't have you even want to take the birds under your wings that's because I'm a mother a mother those Danes of ours have a fine opinion of themselves you're calling the sparrows and they answer I'd be modest guess I better scouted the crumbs and then come in their own good time I hope the crows don't get them all why don't you put a place card out on the lawn idea napkin and a fork and really make a bad for this after all you can't feed a strange bird a mere crumb thoughtful darling come on back in the house with none of this nonsense oh what a horrible day goodbye birdies whimsy there's a very self-satisfied look about you today should be I feel just like little orphan and me I said before it's very nice and warm in our house are you little orphan Annie because you've done your good deeds I fed the birds of Eastbrook stop convincing yourself how noble you are well don't you think I'm noble I see a halo of feathers on your brow I get out of my way I've got to the office I can't spend all day in this aviary there aren't any airplanes around well it really isn't fun pretending to yourself that you're ignorant I don't know fun for me fun for me I have a wonderful time in your way I think it's because I'm married to a bird love David was Florence Nightingale a bird lover go away was Robin Hood a bird lover don't kill yourself I know I know another night and guess Swedish Jenny Lynn she's a bird lover I'll paint I bright you just think you're the funniest thing oh take off David let me pat down your don't you touch me that keep your head keep your head get away from the roosterly darling what's in it for me well don't you want your little canary to be sad you don't want me to be you a canary well you can't even see I can't I can sing like a crow like a crow I'm the only bird in this family or a rooster and I'm a rooster who sings like a bird listen wonderful do it again no just thank for my breakfast now I have to leave you until supper David you are a ventriloquist bird that's a lot of ventriloquist birds listen to what you're doing sounds like the birds were all I was afraid this would happen afraid what it has oh let's look I still have my coat I'll be warm enough David for heaven's sakes will you look at great day in the morning it's a lie I never saw so many birds will be drowned snowed under every kind of good heavens I didn't know there were so many birds are you asked for the wonderful look at them all I'll say sweet David tell me what kind they are that one right over there you see that one that is a lead bellied thrush oh that belly drop that went on the drop as I live and breathe yes sir a put it back I swear that's it what it it's a red cockled mackerel that's what it is that that's a funny name for bird there's something very fishy about that very famous bird very famous comes from way down way down in south of heaven but I think I have a name there is something fishy about it it's a red mackerel cockerel that's what it is it's a very very rare bird very sure there's that kind of a bird I'm perfectly sure and then you see that one right over there coming around the edge of that bush sneaking around there peeping at it that is a thrushal wish I'm not I swear I know my thrushal wishes when I see them you think for a minute I believe you oh more birds this place is getting worse in the public library on 42nd Street you started yes you realize you'll go over there it'll all be back every single morning if there's our waiting to be fed oh I don't mind I do I oh they look so starved so cold how are we going to support all these hungry mouths and beyond me there aren't an awful lot of mouths in the global birds and at eight every morning each little mouth will be chirping for its breakfast and these birds will tell their brothers and sisters and uncles and aunts now for an example one bird will come up and say um what's that mean well that means if you go over to the knot and you can get some food any other one will say and then we'll be picked lean by ravenous birds all because of one little crumb one little salt hard magpie calm there's only one solution David we'll have to give the birds the loaf and we'll keep the crumbs and as Confucius say a bird in the hand means two in the breadbox lead me away darling I am going to the birds home sweet home seems twice as sweet to most folks when friends and neighbors drop in and hospitality reigns supreme with fun and talk and refreshment that's the time when coca-cola served icy cold provides the most welcome and delicious treat and you're glad to have a good supply on ice how's your supply right now better get some today hey Joe what's up David nothing's up everything it should be up is down mean there's not a bird left in the sky I mean there is not one single solitary single bird left in the sky not one what did you expect I expect very much I think I'll go out front and fly away to New York now well have a good day a good flight into the city thank you take my advice David finish up all your work there all of it because tomorrow you won't I won't what finish it up too many interruption oh so work while you can and while Claudia isn't around I'll do that so long Joe bye David every day Monday through Friday Claudia comes to you transcribed with the best wishes of your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola so listen again tomorrow at the same time and now this is Joe King saying all of war and remember whoever you are whatever you do wherever you may be when you think of refreshment think of coca-cola or coca-cola makes any pause the pause that refreshes and ice cold coca-cola is everywhere this broadcast of Claudia was supervised and directed by William Brown Maloney and now here's a word from your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola