 It's not everybody understands, not every doctor understands, that these things can have quite an impact on your life. The main thing when you take antidepressants is to improve your life. And if they've got negative effects on your mental state, on your ability to function, that make it worse, what's the point? My god, it's sunny. You know what, I'll probably go back inside, I don't want to. I'll say I could go for a little walk, wouldn't I? I'm gonna go for a walk. Walk and talk. I'm gonna head outside to do my vlog video. Whatever, whatever you want to call it. It's a log on a video. So yeah, here we go. Hopefully the audio isn't too distorted by the wind. That's why I take a walk in nature while I'm talking about today's topic, everybody. I forgot to say actually, welcome to my video. And today we are going to be talking to you, obviously, when we're talking about. Today we're going to be talking about antidepressants and my experience with antidepressants. So basically, if you've seen any of my other videos, it's no lie that I've had quite a tough childhood, quite a tough teenager and period when I was younger, and I've suffered from depression for about, god, maybe like eight years. Maybe eight years is a bit of a stretch. Six or seven years, I'd say my actual diagnosis was moderate depression. And in some cases, when it was really bad, it tippled up to severe. As well as the depression, I also had problems with severe anxiety as well. Obviously, first give me some psychological treatment and then try some drugs out on me, which did help, I've got to say. So first I want to talk about the first drug that I tried, which was Prozac. I can't remember the chemical, the normal name for it. What's the name of it? Anyway, Prozac, you can probably google it if you don't know the chemical name for it. Prozac is basically a blade. It's an SSRI, which is serotonin reuptake inhibitor. And it works on basically giving you a boost of serotonin in your brain, which is responsible for mood in a lot of cases. And the basis of it is elevating your mood so that you don't have those depressive symptoms. And you don't have all those issues with suicide and self-harm, which I didn't have all the time. Initially, when I talked to the antidepressants, I was in a very, like, strange time of my life. It's hormone and when you're a teenager, my mood fluctuated quite a lot on a very large scale. Like, I was completely okay at school, talking to my friends and stuff, to wear a very large, slight bounce of depression, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts, stuff like that, when I was at home. You could say it made you almost kind of fluctuated from that day. So as on that Prozac for, I think maybe three or four years, when you really notice the effects of them coming off the antidepressant, you really notice the negatives of it and the positive aint on after you've actually, you know, come off them. One of the things that I found was, as well as the enhancement of the negative emotions, and obviously if I felt bad, it would probably be a lot easier for me to get suicidal thoughts and issues with my mood when I was off the Prozac. But it also elevated my positive thoughts as well, which is one of the reasons why I made this video today is I wanted to just brainstorm some ideas about the negatives and the positives of antidepressants and stuff, because it's not all, take this, you're going to feel better. It's not like Alice in Wonderland, feel better instantly, look down the looking glass and you'll be alright, kind of deal with antidepressants. It's a double-edged sword in some cases. So it's not uncommon for people to have these kind of feelings about antidepressants. They kind of, there's a thing in the community of people to take them where, I don't know why I said community, there's no Prozac community going on. Well, I meant there might be, I don't know. Some people might be really obsessed with antidepressants, I don't know. There's some weird stuff going on on the internet. But yeah, it can leave you sort of feeling like a zombie. It suppresses your negative emotions and it suppresses your positive emotions as well. So, one of my conclusions from the whole antidepressant Prozac stuff like that is that although it can be a very good measure of reducing those negative emotions and good in cases where someone's depression is that bad that they consider it ending their life or they've already tried, which had happened in my case, which is obviously not the best scenario. But also I find that it is true that positive emotions and the tie of positive emotions to your actions is a very good motivator. For example, if you take antidepressants, you get used to the positive emotions not being too strong, not being much of a motivator. I'm going out of breath now, I haven't been, I've been lazing about on the sofa for about a week and a half. So walking is getting me tired now, what's going on? So yeah, these positive emotions can be a really big motivator and they can be dampened down, which can reduce your, you want to, you know, do stuff. And a lot of the issues with depression is that it can affect your noisy cat. It can affect your mood, not my mood, what am I talking about? It can affect your energy and it can affect your positive outlook in life. You may settle for lower paying jobs when you're depressed. You may have less confidence, less ability to form relationships, friendships. You're more likely to settle for jobs that you don't like as much and not go for the stuff that you really care about and the stuff that enrich your life and make you feel better about yourself, which is quite a big importance. Being a kid on antidepressants, obviously, is going to set a baseline for most of your life that's going to be very hard to come back from and you'll have an idea of what positive emotions feel like and they'll be dampened down compared to everybody else's. So it's going to be very hard to empathise with the level of emotion that you're expected to feel about things and people are going to question why you're not so excited about something and why you're not so positive about something because it makes it harder. It makes it harder to do that because it's not as good to feel good when you're on Prozac. I've only made a lap around the place near my dad's house and there's a lot of old grannies in the gardens giving me some weird looks. Why is he talking to his mobile? It's such a wide angle. So yeah, the positive dampening of antidepressants is so alive. There's quite a good psychologist guy who's been in the American media for quite a long time called Jordan Peterson. He's had a tribunal or something, not a tribunal. I'm using that word flippantly, I don't really know what it means. He's been to court and stuff and he's had some issues with feminists and stuff because he knows how to transcend the community and accepted pronouns and stuff. But apart from that, he's a very good psychologist. He talks a lot about issues to do with depression. For example, one of the things that he was talking about was how our central nervous systems are very similar to lobsters. So antidepressants actually work on lobsters, which is a very strange thing. Apart from that silly gimmick, he's also not silly. But apart from that funny fact, he also mentioned antidepressants may not be effective. Obviously, he's only one psychologist and there's a whole host of information that says otherwise. But although depressants can have an uplifting effect and it can ward off suicide, it does not necessarily make you feel good and make you feel not depressed. If you're depressed and you've got everything else in your life sorted out, it can be very good. You could have everything sorted out, which in your life, relationships, job, money, whatever, you could be comfortable, but have those depressive effects that is commonly associated with depression and the low serotonin in your brain. So you could have everything sorted out, but you could be depressed. And those kind of situations could be really good for the use of depressants, antidepressants, which was what he was saying quite a lot. And in some cases, when you don't have all that sorted out and you don't have all the family, the friends, the job, the confidence, the maturity, and they can't help, they don't help very much in a lot of cases. And obviously from what I was saying before, they can dampen down your positive experiences, which is definitely something that I've found. So I've talked a little bit about Prozac and my experience with depression symptoms and the side effects of Prozac and antidepressants are the side effects of analgasmia and appetite stuff and all those kind of stuff. I'm talking about the actual mental effects to do with your depression. So it's worth taking that into note. If you're an adult having a look for your kid, maybe they're suffering with depression, it might be worth taking this on board and mentioning it to your doctor. Obviously I'm not a trained medical professional, so I'm just giving you my experience with depression. Hopefully it will give you a bit more information about what it will be like. So you don't want to turn your kids into zombies, you don't want to send yourself into a zombie if you can help it. One thing also to mention is that depressant doses can vary very, very widely depending on the person and also the type of depression as well. So if you're very high energy and your energy is bad, maybe you've got ADHD or something, you might have better times with one medication and if you're quite relaxed, you don't really like doing much stuff, not much motivation, you might be better with a depression which is more energy-based. It's not going to dampen your energy down and you sleep and make you sleep too much. Which brings me on to my next tablet that I've tried, which is Matrazapine. Matrazapine isn't an SSRI, it's to do with, I believe it's mostly to do with, things like N-A-S-S-R or something like that. Don't call me on that actually. Forget that, I can't really remember. Basically Matrazapine is a drug which is also a sensitive as well. So basically this whole video is talking about the effects of depressants that are not well documented and they're not well, they're not entwined with the mental health aspects of depressants which is arguably the most important side effects and when you've got low motivation and low energy and you're trying to get your life back on check, some of these effects can have a large impact on your ability to function. I found particularly with Matrazapine that it has quite a big sedative effect. So a sedative effect, it makes you feel drowsy and sleepy. When you first go onto these tablets, the effects can be immediately noticed. You take them at night, it knocks you out, it helps them in some of your light levels, it's really good if you take them on the regular. But especially if you're a student and you have quite a variable sleep period, a variable time to wake up for lectures, it can be quite difficult to do all that kind of stuff. And when you, fingers with this tablet is when you take it, the levels of it build up in your system and it can get very, let's turn around now, it can get very high levels and it can make you very drowsy during the day as well. And it can make you very, it's really, really, really, really difficult to wake up in the morning, even more than having severe depression in my case, where you just can't move in the morning or have severe anxiety. It totally triples that, it just makes it so difficult. Up until the point where I was, at one point I was waking up at about 3pm and going to sleep at about 4am, which is obviously not very good for you. And it's a good job that, you know, my job allowed for that and I could adjust my sleeping periods and my work periods to that because, you know, it was open all through the night, so I could just work. But yeah, that was one of the really debilitating side effects for me. Obviously for some people, you might have the routine, it might be a lot easier for you to wake up. But I found myself three or four hours after waking up from these tablets, ridiculously drowsy, and I couldn't do anything. And the lack of ability to get the energy to do stuff, to wake up at a reasonable time, and it really took a big toll on my self-esteem as well and my confidence in myself, which was quite a big importance in recovering from depression. Another thing was the appetite gain as well. Obviously this medication would be great for someone with anorexia or someone who struggles with eating, nausea, you know, obviously not nausea, sorry. Any kind of, you know, thing to do with that. And we're not eating enough. But with me, there's basically the effects of the appetite stimulation was also quite a big problem for me. Basically what it does is it scales up your appetite by about 400-500 calories. The peak of the appetite increase is after you take the tablet. So if you're prone to binge eating and late night snacking like I am, it can exhaust a bit of that quite a lot and it can make it a big thing to be able to overcome, which, you know, it's not particularly the best. Also if you're struggling with your confidence issues and you already have a significant amount of weight on or you've got a very fragile ego, if you're a gym goer, if you're trying to lose weight, trying to look good and stuff, taking this tablet can make it significantly harder to diet. If you're an athlete, it can harder to wake you, make you weight. It can make it harder to feel good about yourself, which is another aspect of mental health, which is a side effect, which is not really highlighted enough in these type of things. That's my experience from a Trazapine. I was on the Max Dose, one on the Max Dose, but pre-high dose of 30 milligrams every day, which I have voluntarily on my own, which I do not recommend unless you know a lot about medications and you know how to scale yourself back, which I reduce my dose to about a quarter. So I took 15 every two days, and that seemed to give me quite a boost on the days that I took it in terms of serotonin, and it allowed me to also notice the effects when I was on it, the sedative effects, and also get the energy I needed on some days to wake up in the morning and feel good about myself and feel like I can set my routine at sleep and then wake up the next day, maybe a bit harder because of the tablet, but I could still do it because I had my sleep in from the briefest night. I wasn't in this spiral of going later, later and later into the night, which happened a lot when I was in Thailand. So that's the two tablets that I've tried. I've tried other tablets, like anti-anxiety tablets. That's a whole different ballpark. Benzeday is a penis, visa blockers. I've tried a lot of that stuff. Very much trial and error and some of them were very debilitating as well. Maybe that's for a different video. I hope you found this interesting if you're thinking about taking antidepressants or you just want a bit of empathy in terms of that to get a bit of understanding with some of the effects because not everybody understands, not every doctor understands that these things can have quite an impact on your life. The main thing when you take antidepressants is to improve your life. If they've got negative effects on your mental state, on your ability to function that make it worse, what's the point? So in conclusion, antidepressants are a great thing for a lot of people. Some people, not so much. Second thing, antidepressants can have, as well as the side effects physically, it can have effects on your mental ability to function and it can have effects on other arbitrary things like confidence and ability to regulate and stuff and if you take yourself in quite high esteem and you have quite a big ego like myself, having these effects can be quite hard on you and quite hard for you to deal with and accept and accept for other people and tell your doctors so it can have quite a bit of a big effect if you don't try and mitigate it. Obviously, if you talk to professionals and you have depression, you should consult them always about this kind of stuff. Don't take my advice as gold. This is my experience with it. It may differ person to person. Antidepressants have a very good level of effectiveness in most people. So don't dismiss that fact. They are definitely a very reasonable form of dealing with this kind of thing. You need to make sure that you highlight to your doctors how much of a problem your depression may be. A lot of the cases they may be quite reluctant to put you onto them. You need to be very proactive in getting in your appointments on a regular basis in order to make sure that they give you proper treatment and to make sure that you question a lot of what they say to make sure that you're getting the correct treatment for yourself. For example, reading up on different medications, suggesting different medications. A lot of doctors, although they are very expertise and they've got a lot of knowledge on this kind of stuff, they don't always have the right answers and they don't always have all the knowledge that's needed, especially to do with new medications that might work. So that's quite a big second point. Number three is... I just wanted to mention this last thing that I've been researching quite a bit recently. This is a different type of drug called Bruperium. It's basically a drug that when taken in conjunction with something other or just on its own, can have both a negative and a personal effect. And it can also work on increasing the amount of positivity that you can get and the amount of pleasure that you can get from life. So that's been strange when you say it like that, but basically it's also a dopamine real technique which is dopamine is these pleasurable sensations that you get from the environment. Music, anything, any sort of loving interaction, any sort of happy thing that happens in your life. Dopamine. Your motivation is very, very much measured by dopamine. Dopamine is the molecule of survival so it gets you to do what you want to do. Food, eating, you know, sugar, obviously not great in this society. Sex, all those kind of things. Dopamine regulated. All that pleasure is regulated by dopamine so it's quite an important chemical. And if you're very deficient in that, your motivation to do so can be quite lacking. So with, I recommend you check in now. I'm not recommending you take it, I recommend you having a look at it because it's one of the possibilities that you could mention to your doctor if you're struggling with quite a hard bit. And also, my child's very small at the moment so if you have any problems with depression, any problems with anxiety, any problems with medication, you want a bit of help, a bit of a second person's view, send me a comment, put me a comment in the comment section and tell me about it. Or if you don't want to disclose it on the comment section, you can always DM me or join my page and DM me on Facebook. You can always, you know, do it on Instagram if you really feel like you want to DM on Instagram. And I think maybe there is also a YouTube messaging thing now as well. There's loads of stuff like that. I mean, if you can't do any of that stuff and you just have an email, then I'll give you my email. You can send me a message if you want to talk to me about it. Also, if it's something that you really want to talk quite a lot about, I'm very willing to talk about these kind of video calls and stuff if you really need to talk about stuff. Because obviously I don't want to do anything stupid or I want to help people obviously and I can do that now that I've got social and a lot of other stuff. I might change when I get a bit more and sort it out in terms of subscribers and likes and popularity and whatever. All those kind of stuff on YouTube. But for now I'm here for you guys and I really do respect every subscriber that I have anybody who watches my videos. You don't have to comment just watching my videos is just such a great thing for me and I'm really happy to be able to put these out and help people. That's what it's all about for me. I'm not just saying that because I want to sound cool or nice or I really do. 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So thank you very very much I would put my hands together in thanks but I'll just do it one hand thank you for watching again and I'll see you in the next video hopefully