 Today, I brought a very special guest to talk about overcoming anxiety and what it was like talking about on such a large platform. What is up, everybody? This is Chris from the Rewired Soul, where we talk about the problem, but focus on the solution. And as you can see, I'm joined by a very special guest for the few people who do not know you. Go ahead and introduce yourself. I'm the specialist of guests. The soul. The almighty. Hey guys, my name is Swoop, and yeah, happy to be here. What do you do on your channel? Yeah, in simplistic terms, it's kind of scripted life meets reality, meets craziness. I'm most often compared to, like, if Casey Neistat and Ryan Higa had a love child. So it's very cinematic. I do short films. I do serious work, but I do a lot of comedy and a lot of roasts. And then crazy things, like crashing my subscribers' wedding, that kind of stuff. Yeah, yeah, that was awesome. And she also, as well as behind the camera, did an awesome remix of Shane Dawson's Laugh. Yes. I'll play a clip of that right here. What if his laugh triggers the algorithm? What the hell are you talking about? What if we sample his laugh and make a beat just using his laugh? Okay, I like that part. Right? And then we could, like, go blast it in the streets of Los Angeles. I like that part also. And see if we can hypnotize people. I understand. Oh, come on, let's do it. Let's make it happen. So, yeah, anyways, I have followed Swoop since everybody was sharing this video about how you had a different channel that was 600,000. It was about 630,000 subscribers. YouTube had some crazy, you explain it as like this weird bolt of lightning. Yes. Stop going out to people. You made a new channel. But anyways, you, what sparked my interest, again, was you made a short film about living with depression and anxiety. Yes. Which even won an award. It did. That was pretty sweet. So let me ask you this, because something that I try to talk to people about, a lot of people are afraid to open up about these things and share their story. What was it like for you to capture that, especially like the scene where it was like you having the breakdown and calling your mom like, were you scared to put that there? You know, it was one of those weird things. If I had time to think about it, then I probably would have been. But just the circumstances surrounding that. I was so deep in that darkness. Which is where I got the title, Lost in Darkness. That's how I felt. And I was so like, I knew just for feeding the algorithm and the content and the new channel that I had to put up something. But that was a particularly bad week for me mentally. And I knew, well, I can't not post something because I feel a slave to this machine. So I just documented what I was going through and made the film around it. And I was like, I have to upload, so I guess I'm just going to put this out there. And like, I was just so mentally just messed up and dark that like I didn't even think about like, should I be nervous about this? Or should I be scared to do this? I was just like, I just, nothing of that was processing. Yeah. No, absolutely. And then sometimes it's just like screw it, you know, when my brain's in a million places, like logic goes out the window. It's like, but it worked out. Right. So like, and then you made your video about going to Buffer Fest. And like, one of the things, because I did some reviews of your short film. And like, one of the things I love the most because I was afraid to share my story for a long, long, long time. But seeing all the people coming up to you and thanking you, like, did that, like, did that kind of make it worth it? And like, what was that impact? Like, knowing that your story connected with other people and they said it helped or whatever it was. I literally just got like goosebumps still thinking about it. No, I mean, that made it everything because it wasn't, it took it beyond this thing of like, here's my own therapy in a sense. Not like therapy, therapy, but you know, the own personal stuff that we use ourselves for me is creating. And so that was also part of my process when I created the film. I was like, I have to create because that's the only thing that I can like function in right now. But it took it beyond this is just something about me trying to help me. And that now I saw all of these people and like, yeah, I was, like, I was terrified when I premiered it at the festival. And I thought everyone's going to hate it. No one's going to understand. So when I had that kind of response, it was like, it was intense. And then I also realized like, dang, like, I think almost everybody on the planet deals with maybe not to that extent, but to some degree everyone deals with levels of depression or some type of anxiousness or just something like there's so many people except for dirt back here. He's the most bubbly person. Just chill. Constantly. Oh my gosh. How do you do it? Give me the secret sauce. Oh my gosh. I have no soul. So that makes me think of something else. Did it help you not feel so alone when you realize other people? Yeah. That was the key. And like my whole message with the film and like what I said at the event was I feel like I've never referenced like the premiere this much. I feel like I'm like. Do it. This is your platform. No, it's weird. It's weird. It's totally weird. But the whole message was like it's okay to not be okay because so much of the time when I would go through like these really emotional periods, people like everything's gonna be okay. Like it's okay. Everything's gonna be okay. And it's like I don't need to hear that right now. I need to just know that it's okay that I feel like total crap right now. And so when other people were saying the same thing and they were encouraged by that, then it was like okay this is the message. Yeah. I think people need to hear and it made me feel like yes, everyone else has not everyone but a lot of people have bad stuff and now I'm not the only one going through this. So what would you suggest because like I try to teach people like there's a reason why I make my videos. Like it feels good when I see other people are benefiting from it or if I'm going through my own thing that I'm not alone. But I tell people like you don't got to start a YouTube channel. You don't got to make a short film and like go to buffer festival. Like what if you suggested to people or what do you suggest to people like to just kind of get their message out there so they don't feel so alone? I think it's important to number one know that you don't. I don't think you have to get your message out there. Okay. I don't think that if someone's going dealing with anxiety or depression or whatever it is. I don't think that you have to make it public in order to feel better. I think it's important to get your message of what you're feeling to someone who cares about you. Okay. So it doesn't have to be this big forum. You don't have to start a YouTube channel. You know what please don't if like you if you're not prepared for everything that comes with that then you know think about that. Not everyone has to be on YouTube because it will beat you. It'll beat the shit out of you. Hey, no worries. I believe for monetization reasons. I think it's most important first to get the message of your personal feelings to a family member or to a therapist or to somebody who's there to listen and to be a support system for you. And then if you feel like I want to share this with more people that maybe my thoughts feelings will help other people and do that however you are most naturally compelled if you're a writer write something. Yeah. Do a blog. Send a tweet. You know it doesn't have to be something bigger epic or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. It can reach just somebody. And that's something that I've learned too. Like we're all in different stages. Like when I was you know in the start of my mental health journey it's like I can't help anybody just keep helping me keep helping me. It took me a couple of years until I got to a place where I'm like okay maybe my message can help somebody else. You know one last thing I want to ask you before finding out like what you've been doing since that film is like you're right. Like it's okay to not be okay. And I don't know if you've struggled with this. I think I think in one of your follow-up videos you talked about this but have you ever realized because I've talked about this recently have you ever went into something where like you have a difficult time saying it's okay to be okay because your brain is always so chaotic. So then when you start working on yourself your mind's not used to it. And it's like looking for something to get anxious about. Yeah. My life summed up where's the tea. Yeah I think I'm like I'm so good at beating myself up even when something is going well or going great right. And so I'm always I feel like I'm I don't want to say always I don't I don't want to be that person who like blankets. I used to always be that person trying to do better. But even like we've been talking about the premiere in the film stuff even when like that was a very big moment for me as you know a creative and I beat the crap out of myself because it's like well how am I ever going to leave up to this again or I'll never make something that you know compelling again or like you know and instead of enjoying that moment of like this is good for you. It was like OK but where's the problem so that I can dwell on those and yeah I do that constantly so I have to have people around me like dirt or you know people are close to me remind me oh but hey like you have a camera that you got to make a film with like you have ability to make stuff and that's really cool and so like celebrate those things instead of focusing so much on but something might go wrong at any point. Yeah exactly my girlfriend's that person for me. She snaps me right back to reality. So we first met in person at Vid Summit which was in October and I was after Buffer Festival and everything and I was kind of like hey how's it going now and stuff and now it's been a couple months more. So like you know although neither one of us are licensed professionals but we've both dealt with that like what are some things that you've done to kind of work on your anxiety or depression that might help somebody else maybe it might help me like what are some of the things that you've done. Well everything I'd say is with the caveat of like I'm not out of the woods yet and that I think it's a long process and for me having that sort of breakdown moment that I had which happened in August July August I've still deal with quite a lot of those feelings often but I'm now figuring out ways to put them in check more so one of the things that I'm actually actively doing now is I have a counselor and so that it's an interesting strange world for me but that helps a lot just actually having a licensed professional who is like guiding me through you know into someone I check in with so that's definitely I know people I've always kind of been like on the fence about therapy like actual therapy therapy and I never wanted it to be something where I'm like oh well my therapist says you know and it's like I don't want to be you know like I just but that has helped quite a lot. How often do you see your counselors? Monthly, weekly, bi-weekly? Weekly it's with better help actually. I was about to say I just started using a therapist through better help by the way not sponsored but like I'm the mental health guy and just real quick I'm just going to tell you my thing real quick like I was reluctant to getting help because like I'm the mental health guy like why should I get help and especially with my channel growth and some other things going on I'm like Chris take your own dang advice because I even though I preach it some of the things that you're talking about I didn't want to be like whoa my camera you know but it's been so beneficial like and through better help I get to text and stuff like that and again not sponsored but like I'll be like in it and then I check it and I'm like dang she just dropped some truth on me you know and it's been great for me because I still need to learn stuff about myself. Yeah we all do. What have they kind of helped you with? Is it identifying things giving you coping skills like what is it just someone to talk to? Yeah well it's funny like well as far as like working with a therapist just having more focus and for me it's almost things like giving me homework in a sense that like which I kind of need that push sometimes like actually number one just schedule scheduling something like this is the hour of the week that I am specifically going to be working on my mental health because I have to because I've scheduled a call with a therapist so that has been really good and then we've gotten into you know mindfulness and meditation and like all of those things that I was never like oh meditation because it's but having someone explain to me that it's not meant to just instantly fix you like you need to just take two minutes a day or three times a day if you can or like just a couple of minutes and just quiet everything and just be in the moment yourself. Do you use like an app for meditation? I use calm is like my... Me too! We're using all the same things! I'm stealing my mood though. No I just put like rain sounds on and I have a little timer and then I just sit with it and I try it's very still hard because I'm like stressed and like thinking about things but I just try to clear the mind a little bit and that helps but then honestly going outside was a big one for me because as a filmmaker and an editor I'm like locked to my computer so much and like you know I literally just finished being awake for 56 hours working on a project. Yeah we were like trying to figure this out and she's a busy woman. So sleeping more regularly has been a big one for me. A big one or a big challenge? It's a big challenge and I've recognized how important that is for my health when I had like the worst anxiety is when I wasn't sleeping or when I wasn't sleeping on a consistent schedule and then just being locked into one surrounding was really becoming a burden so just taking five minutes to go for a walk outside and just being looking at nature actually really helps. Petting my cat, helped quite a lot and journaling and just writing out the thoughts. For me that was kind of creating on camera was like I'm going to spew all of this out so that I can look back on it when I'm in my right mind and recognize how irrational it is. Yes, please listen to that. It's so important. That's a big thing for me is I've used some apps for mood tracking and stuff and what it helps me with is knowing that these things don't last forever. So it's like on Monday I'm having a really bad day and I write that down then Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday great days, Saturday a bad day I can look back through the week and say oh this is something that passes this isn't like because when we're in it sometimes it feels like we're going to be in it forever. So when you can look back at that and by the way that's why I appreciate about your channel is like when you kind of have these like journaling ideas like you film it Has anybody ever told you that they've used that or tried it? As far as... Like your subscribers or viewers? The journaling that you do? No, I've gotten a lot of feedback about that and there are people who like not everyone wants to journal right but even people are like oh well I just watched that letter that you wrote to us when I'm feeling down and that alone helps which is great but just expressing in some form of way what you're feeling I think documenting when you're in the midst of the darkness is important it's been one of the most important things for me so that I can look and be like okay this is not rational the other big thing I feel like a long run on sentence sorry y'all another big thing that has really helped me was something that my mom said to me and it was this idea about you would never say things that you say to yourself to me, your mother or to your best friend my mom's like my best friend so she's like you would never say those awful things that you say to yourself to me so why are you saying it to yourself and so remembering that has been huge for me like when I have these like I'm awful, I'm no good I can't do anything right I'm failing at everything well I would never tell my mother that, I would never tell my best friend that I would just be supportive something that I hear a lot I heard this somewhere there's common sense and then there's common action so like it's common sense to be like okay you wouldn't say that to somebody else it's hard to like remember that it's hard to practice that or it's hard to be like well I'm not amazing like my mother because I get it I think about that like me it's my son I wouldn't say that stuff to him you know but sometimes like well my students are like awesome and amazing I'm not you know so is that difficult or is it hard to remember to do that when you're in the midst of it yeah I mean nothing is foolproof and we're gonna fail at these things whatever element you take whether I want a journal or I want to meditate you're going to fail like that's we're humans that's what we do so but you fail less at it the more you do it because you're developing habits with it like I've spent a lifetime developing the habit of beating myself up and telling myself that I suck at everything and so now I have to recognize it's going to take some time for me to develop the habits of saying you're not that bad you're okay that's awesome so what we're going to do we're going to follow up again at some point and see if that happens but you're absolutely right and that's what I hope everybody's takeaway is one of the many takeaways is that this stuff takes time you know you don't just start I equate it to like going to the gym like I started going to the gym don't know if you notice but anyways like imagine if I went to the gym once and I'm like whoop I don't go to six pack you would never do that so like with your mind if you start meditating or you start therapy or whatever it is or you start journaling you're not going to see that result in like a day what I found and this is what I've been teaching people is you'll most likely have other people in your life notice that you're doing better before you even do like noticed in your life that you're you seem a little bit better well yes yes and no because I still I literally I still have ups and downs right like I had a very down moment just yesterday and so yes in that I will get encouragement like from dirt or from my mom who's like you know just the people who are I don't let a lot of people in to be like extremely close to who really know me and so there's just a small handful but when yeah when I'm acting a little happier than I get that kind of reinforcement and then when I go back to the old stuff the old self then I get just little reminders of like hey remember how you're not that bad yeah why don't we think about that a little bit by the way and that's a tip for all of you if you have somebody in your life who's like working on themselves like make sure you try to celebrate their successes like I remember somebody told me like they hadn't seen me in a few months when I was starting when I got sober and started working on my mental health was like a month or two later like Chris I haven't seen you smile this much ever yeah and I'm like oh you know something's happening right you know and it was good that they pointed it out to you yeah and that's because here's the thing we get and for those of you who are neuroscience you little spurts of dopamine when people compliment you yes you know what I mean well my girl your makeup is looking bomb today well spurred a dopamine so go compliment somebody you're doing look boom just just handing out dopamine you know you know so yeah is there any final advice you want to give to anybody out there or tips or a message of hope to anybody out there who might be struggling and they're lost in the darkness yes I think it's just it's important to always remember that it is okay to not be okay and that you just work on coming to a place where you can decide in your own mind and acknowledge I'm not okay right now but this isn't going to last forever because you have had moments in your life that were happy were okay and that eventually you can get back to that but it's just going to take a little bit of practice of loving yourself a little bit more as cliche as that sounds and I hate saying that kind of stuff but just like we work a job just like we work you know if you're raising kids or you're going to school and we dedicate our time to all life things we also have to dedicate some time to the mind and keeping that health in check but you're absolutely not alone ever if you're not feeling okay and it's okay to be not okay sometimes and just kind of stew in that a while recognize here I am I accept it this is what's happening but this isn't going to be forever exactly and I'm going to put a bunch of social media links down in the description what platforms that you are working people find you at YouTube is the big one and Twitter and Instagram and yeah I think that's those are the big ones okay well those are all going to be down in the description below so make sure you go check out the channel also link your short film down there I did a review of it too maybe I'll link that down in the description too all the links all right but again you guys aren't alone keep coming back check out swoops progress over on our channel and we'll see you next time