 Okay welcome back to class. The last class we did talk about how do we make a choice of marrying someone. We spoke about the four areas of compatibility and we also you know got an in-depth about what are some of the warning signs that we may need to look into. I think Kennedy has raised a question here. Are there types of marriages? Yes, how or where can we classify eloping? Types of marriages. Kennedy would you like to probably put to me as to what you meant by types of marriages? Yeah, what am I inquiring? Yes, what is it? Yes, go ahead, Kennedy. Yeah, what am I inquiring? Yeah, people who are in polygamous marriages and the people who get into marriage through eloping. How do you, are those kinds of classifications or they are types of how would you treat eloping? Is it in your culture? Okay, so I think you've spoken about two, it's polygamy as well as marriage via eloping. So is it in our culture? No, that's a good question because you know especially in India there are many many small little mini cultures here but however let me just tell you what scripture says in scripture there is just one marriage that's defined between one man, one woman only before God and that's how we define marriage. Also, can we, where do we classify eloping? Now the concern I think or the thought when we're looking at eloping is to deciding to walk away from a setup that has been instituted because of certain reasons of unacceptance and so now these are my thoughts. Okay, so how I'd see eloping would be moving away to get married on your own choice maybe on your own terms without completely trusting that the Lord will bring this in a position of marriage. So I'm trying to think of so specific, let me say maybe in our culture. So there are times, so there are examples that I can think of where there is a believer young man and a believer woman or maybe one of them has not come from a Christian background or a believing background and is from another culture or another religion and having opposing parents or family who does not accept the union. So in a system like that the recommendations I personally would give is number one to do the best that you can to get help to seek the support from the family because you may be in the Lord but maybe your family isn't in the Lord and as a result it can be difficult. So getting people involved to speak or to intervene in the situation could be one. The second is getting help from spiritual leaders, spiritual mentors on the best way to go forward. I know of couples who waited for many years till they have had the consent from the key significant people in their lives because of the due respect and the love that they wanted to show in wanting the family to be part of their marriage. The third one of course is deciding against what maybe the parents have felt and going ahead. But I think one of the things about classifying in eloping it is doing things maybe in secret and that is that I believe is something you know we need to be truthful and honest and open about and I think even having courage to being willing to you know maybe move out of the home because they don't agree with the person you've chosen because they are in the Lord if that is one of the primary reasons it is to be done with as much of poise and as much of patience not you know snipping off the important relationship especially those that are parental. So in my understanding you know eloping probably is something that is not a very healthy mode but something that I think it can be worked out better by time in patients in a lot more of help and support through the leaders around. I don't know would anyone else have any other thoughts? I'd be interested to hear if someone else has any other thoughts that was not considered in the answer. Anyone? I'm sure some people have some thoughts yes Sam go ahead. So I mean yeah primarily you know eloping so far has been defined as well you know the two people involved the boy and the girl are somehow scared of confronting parents either way confronting the girls parents or confronting and they just decide to say we have married without and somehow avoid all the confrontation. But lately I'm also seeing a trend where like it's a elopement in sort of an understanding way like everybody knows that these two have been seeing each other and they are ready to get married but I don't know maybe to avoid a big wedding to avoid the legalities of stuff they just decide on on eloping but I think something that I'm trying to understand is when does a boy and a girl actually get married is it like after completing the ritual like they walk the aisle and there's a ceremony and the and the pastor or some elder blesses the union it's witnessed by people and then you know the boy and the girl are deemed married or or is the boy and the girl you know let's say they have an understanding and and they just declare themselves like like a couple like if they just you know let's say both believers and and they know they are not supposed to engage in premarital sex but let's say they end up having sex and they say like okay now with this but let's just declare ourselves like married and would that be considered as marriage from the word elopement I'm just scattered all over but I'm looking at what defines elopement and how is it different from what defines marriage is it is it the formal ceremony the witnessing by the people and the approval by given by the people the three announcements of marriage bans that happen and that do all of that comprise our marriage or is that just being a cultural setting so far and you know we are saying like only when a boy and a girl they do all of these they the marriage bans are announced there's consent from everybody and then you know there's a ceremony on there's a date declared and there's a ceremony so that is married or you know like going back maybe even in abrahamic times or before and there's no formal ceremony or I don't know maybe the jewishers are known for having elaborate ceremonies but can marriage happen without all of these formalities and is elopement just the word the missing of formalities is it called elopement or is there you know so that's that's what wrestling looks like thank you okay anyone has a contribution as an answer well I think the other thing to add is that there is also this you know there are registered marriages so that could also you know that doesn't need to have a ceremony people that get married because sometimes that is required for you know for for for visas to get you know get to another country so people go in for registered marriages and they are you know that could also be another way of you know getting married you know like a court marriage so it doesn't it doesn't necessarily have any anything ready to do with elopement specifically but just thought I'll just add that that aspect of marriage okay so this is what I I think is when we consider marriage as believers let's look at the way that the first marriage was solemnized sorry and we do see how God bought them together and yes as a cultural representation we do it as part of a ceremony where we speak our vows before God as well as follow the cultural and the legal law of the land culturally maybe you know bringing people together so that there are witnesses for the union and legally because it means either it's a you know registered marriage or it is signed or you know and that also adds to the law of the land and all these together are instituted for the safety of the people within the marriage being before God that is making that commitment and there are witnesses in that you know any covenant it has to has to have a witness in it too right so so being a covenant relationship in front of God with witnesses and following a specific law of the land is the way that I see you would see you would call somebody married with of course now you did mention Samuel about let's say if there are if there is sexual relationships that happen prior to marriage is that considered marriage in God's word no it isn't because it talks it does say keep the marriage bed honourable and so we do define marriage sorry sex to be within marriage and maybe in our culture we've instituted marriage this way that for a cultural perspective to have it maybe in a church or in a community place where you have the witnesses of others solemnized by a pastor so that's yes a cultural setting that there is to it but then there needs to be witnesses just keeping in line with what a covenant relationship should be I hope I answered your questions I mean yes okay all right okay we'll we'll move on to I'm at Charles we are on page 28 of the of the chapter we we've just completed part of making a choice we're going to be looking at a at an important part of this question that generally arises that is there this one appointed person for me and where is he or she in the world around and how do I find the person okay in order for us to take on some principles of that we're going to be reading a portion of scripture I'm on page 28 and 29 so could there are 15 verses that are here could one person read the first eight and the other the next next seven questions so if may would you be okay if I call out a name someone whose voice I haven't heard at all to read scripture Simran would you like to read the first eight verses please Genesis 24 verses one to eight if you could just unmute that will be helpful 24 Genesis 24 verses one to eight Shrikwad I'll take your question at the end of the class would you kindly note your question please Simran okay somebody else could read that Preci Preci are you on the call Preci okay Susan Nirmal are you on the yes could you read yes yes verses one to eight okay Genesis 24 chapter one to eight verse and Abraham was old and well stricken in age and the Lord had blessed Abraham in all things and Abraham said unto his eldest servant of his house that ruled all over that over all that he had put I pray thee the hand under my thigh and I will make this way by the Lord the God of heaven and the God of the earth that thou shall not take a wife unto my son of the daughters of the canonites among whom I dwell and thou shalt go unto my country and to my kindred and take a wife unto my son Isaac and the servant said unto him per adventure the woman will not be willing to follow me unto this land must I need bring thy son again unto the land from whence thou came comes and Abraham said unto him beware thou that bring not my son here again the Lord God of heaven which took me from my father's house and from the land of my kindred and with speck unto me and that swear unto me saying unto thy seed I will give this land he shall send his angel before thee and thou shall take a wife unto my son from there and if the woman will not be willing to follow you then thou shall be clear from this my oath only bring not my son here again thank you Susan would someone else like to take over um nisha nisha would you like to read verses 9 to 15 or uh beth anybody beth or bula anyone verses 9 to 15 okay ma'am just just a second ma'am i'm going to read sure bula go ahead so from verse 9 yeah so the servant put his hand under the thigh of Abraham his master and swore to him concerning this matter and the servant took 10 of his master's camels and departed taking some of all his master's treasures with him thus he journeyed to Mesopotamia between the Tigris and Euphrates to the city of Nahor Abraham's brother and he made his camels to kneel down outside the city by a well of water at the time of the evening when the women go out to draw water and he said oh lord god of my master Abraham I pray you cause me to meet with good success today and show kindness to my master Abraham see I stand here by the well of water and the daughters of the men of the city are coming to draw water and let it so be that the girl to whom I say I pray you let down your jar that I may drink and she replies drink and I will give your camel's drink also let her be the one whom you have selected and appointed and indicated for your servant Isaac to be a wife to him and by it I shall know that you have shown kindness and faithfulness to my master before he had finished speaking behold out came Rebecca who was the daughter of Bethuel son of milka who was the wife of Nahor the brother of Abraham with her water jar on her shoulder thank you Biola thank you so much okay thank you thank you so here's a very you know setting for an excellent movie isn't it such a excellent romantic story coming up so when we we're going to be looking at certain insights even as this is one question that is often asked you know is there this one appointed person that God has ordained for me and you know do I do I continue waiting on so through this scripture there's some some insights that we'd like to bring up so one of the things that we do see is that Abraham's servant while he went around looking for a person the first thing that we see is he depended on God's guidance and he had a way of seeking the Lord for the guidance and he was had a way of discerning so you know he says that if you look in verse 14 he says see I'm here at this well and let this be something that can that that happened so he does ask God for that guidance and he prays about it and this is his way of depending on on the guidance so if you if you go back and read that chapter and I will suggest that you go and read that chapter later below you see that the servant Abraham servant is watching Rebecca in silence to see whether the guidance that he sought for is happening the way that it is and you know you see that she actually does and she asks gives him the drink and she asks if the camels needed a drink and you also see that you know when that guidance seems to have been fulfilled the servant actually prays and thanks God for the success that he has received okay so one indication is the guidance that that he received now for us as believers as believers who who exist right now our guidance comes from the practical way we get our guidance is from the Holy Spirit okay so for us as as believers we understand that the Holy Spirit is the one who guides us in our spirit to make certain choices or to be able to find out what is pleasing to the Lord or what is acceptable to the Lord so one is guidance the second thing that we need to look at it is the the fact that Rebecca also could have said no right we see this in Genesis 24 verse 8 right so in that the servant asks you know what if the woman is not willing to come what do I do so Abraham says you know you are free of your of you will be free from the promise but don't take my son there if she doesn't come that's fine don't take my son there so we so even in the scripture we see that there is a possibility that that you know Abraham understands that she could have said no the next things I think that we see through the through scripture if you read below in Genesis 24 verses 49 to 51 when the servant is invited to Rebecca's home he you know he he goes and asks the family this is in verse this is in verse 49 so she says verse 49 chapter 24 verse 49 now if you intend to fulfill your responsibility towards my master and read him fairly please tell me if not say so and I will decide what to do so Abraham servant goes to Bethuel and tells him you know I I need you to need to know if you are willing for this alignment so there was a possibility even they would could have said no so in spite of the guidance that he did get he did go back and check with the family of Rebecca as to what they they were willing to do so just as much as we may we do recognize God's hand it is also important that you need to get the consent from the people involved either the woman that's involved or you know in this kind of a culture yes it was it was a family that's involved so you know you're not in a place of manipulating the decision and say no God spoke to me that you are the only one right and maybe the person who you think is who you think maybe the only one may not think so okay and that is something that needs to be understood and respected and so that those are some of the guidelines that we we keep when we say is there that one and only only one person we do also see through the story if you read in from verse 54 onwards Rebecca was also asked for her decision you know in so Bethuel and Laban says you know let's call her and find out what she has to say and and she was willing to agree so even ultimately even Rebecca had to make that choice whether she wanted to say yes or no so in the same way you know there must have been some piece that she had to be to be guided to say to say yes so these are some of our insights as we understand that that that that that even as we we are thinking about what does God desire of us we believe that there may be potential people who may become partners who come in your life you know potentially I mean there are many young men or men there are many young women in in the place that you are and they could be potentially many people but what is it that we need to do to have this guidance is one first and foremost is God's guidance means there should be a teaching of the scripture are you falling in line with what scripture teaches are they in the Lord that's the biggest the first thing that you you need to look into is there the inner witness of the Holy Spirit now when when you're interacting with this person or when you're considering someone is there a witness from the from the person what do what is the advice of maybe family or godly members what are the circumstances that you may be married now now for example if you say the one appoint the one and only appointed one for me is that person who seems to be married that's not in your circumstance right and that's not something that that god desires he will he will not do something that is contrary to his word there could be even certain desires of your heart like you said you know there are certain expectations that you may have and say okay these people fit the fitted and that's again one and of course lastly is the agreement or the willingness of the person that is involved so when so while you are doing the seeking you're not really trying to find the the one and only person but the person that you may recognize as the one god is guiding you to and that really determines who is the best suitable one for you so not looking for okay which is this appointed one but god may be guiding you through this one through these essential factors we spoke about you know the teaching of scripture having the witness of the Holy Spirit maybe advice of people around the consent of the person involved the the the expectations and the desires of your heart and of course lastly we said you know the circumstances that may be involved so these are that's how you seek for a partner so we may not really we do not believe that there could be just one appointed one but the one that you choose with god's guidance with the witness of the Holy Spirit becomes that one person for you becomes the spouse for the rest of your life so all because the person you thought was the appointed one got married to somebody else that does not mean that they are in you know in in in a wrong place or neither are you in a wrong place the decision also needs to be mutual so if god is speaking to them god will also speak to you and you can never force a person to assume hearing and believing what what god has probably spoken to you so would that mean that you do not have a great marriage if you think the appointed one has gone you know like we said marriage is not about finding the right person or the mister perfect it's about daily on a on an everyday basis building your marriage into a relationship as god wanted you to be so it is to know that god will fulfill the purpose for your life as long as the one you have been married has been guided to you've been guided to make that decision keeping some of these factors in mind okay i know this opens out usually this opens up a lot of discussions so i'm i'm taking the next maybe five minutes to to see if anyone does have a question okay i think there are a couple of questions here okay if we believe in a one and only spouse how can we reconcile remarriage after death of a spouse okay so we do not believe in a one and only spouse beth i think that's what we were trying to i hope i've answered that question as i've spoken beth uh abraham your question was pastor it means god can tell you this woman is your wife but the woman can say no or you can miss her because you did not tell her early okay um okay so i think i want to bring about two things over here uh how do i label it but let's say something like and like a like a general guidance is you know you look into scripture you have the you know witness of the holy spirit uh you have your circumstances uh you know right you have those expectations or desires that you've had seen um you've had the consent okay this we will look at uh normal guidance guidance let's say something as that there can be cases where there can be what is a good word super normal extra normal i mean wrong word to use but what i mean to say is something beyond normal okay a different kind or a or an extraordinary or extra normal whatever guidance where god may in some cases tell you that there is this one person and why that happens because i i know that it okay supernatural all right thank you rose yeah so maybe a supernatural guidance where god has shown you one specific person maybe to fulfill a specific purpose in your life or in their lives and without that it wouldn't happen but i'd say that may not be something that is probably normal and uh and there could be that that sense where it could be you know a sense of supernatural where there's that extraordinary guidance about who you need to marry and if that could be like a direct communication from god so that you know um uh and this like i see it may not happen that frequently but god does give that kind of guidance precisely because a decision about who you are to marry is very important or can have an impact for your specific future so yes that can happen but i don't i i don't think that's always the way that it works so god does give you like like for example the job to take you know um there may be certain factors contingent factors that you have in mind and you may take that you may have three or four of it you may decide god i'm taking this one all right so similarly you may have three or four proposals and as you see you do see that all of this fits into your factors god's guided you to that and you take that on and live on on that okay uh so i so yeah so that's so that's that yes or can you miss her because you did not tell her early i mean it again i think this is also cultural where you can approach a person who you feel god is leading you to like this like like just like in the story but be willing to take no for an answer and graciously walk out of the door right um i think there's been one more question by charles what about those who say you're the one i was made to marry and if you marry another one i will never marry what is your stand um i think that's that's being probably a rebellious when when someone who has refused your proposal because they feel that god has called them otherwise is uh and and you want to stick on you know being in in uh in wanting that and only that maybe you should go back and ask god you know was i being in a rebellious streak or um you know or what do i do do i do i uh do i decide as to whether i want to seek and pursue god remember we had spoken about this and i think it's coming further on in the chapter that that if you decide not to marry the decisions should be mainly because you want to do something for god's kingdom that you will be more effective being single and and um following god and serving god and not because someone didn't marry you someone who you felt should have married you shouldn't marry you so i think that uh is not um in obedience to what god would want you to do okay that's uh then i think prabhakar's asked a question how do we recognize if the person is superficial or real in the compatibility okay um a lot by interactions we do know how people are by their interactions always good to do background checks and that's something that is needed even um and and i think that's something very i think very positive about the culture that i am in that when when a person is bought or you know when there is a alliance that is bought about there is a lot of time taken to understand the the setting or the lifestyle or the culture or the working or the character of the person by finding out further details you know you you call um uh you you call the the pastor you call the church you call people within the city and you know so there's a lot of background check that that needs to be done that you are able to recognize if there is genuineness uh in the person so doing that is very very helpful and especially marriages i i i i do um vehemently stand against marriages that take place within a week or two you know someone find someone and then say okay let's get married uh you need to spend time uh judge no research um pray for guidance be able to see what god's leading you to because i i've seen the power i think i i don't know if i mentioned this the last time but i do see the power of prayer even uh you know before marriages take place i remember um you know this one couple where the things were ready the couple was to be married at a particular week the week before uh we prayed together and very strangely i prayed this prayer said god if this is not something you have desired you know close this door i generally don't pray that you know when when a couple is all ready to get married they've got their clothes and dress and their lives planned out uh pranks a prayer like that can be a very scary thing but i don't know i think i was just led by the spirit to pray that and the day before the wedding that marriage was called off due to some issue you know but prayer praying for for that is uh very very important okay all right i think uh charles you had a follow up question pastor they end up committing suicide because they refuse to marry them is not that last uh yes that's last and probably selfishness and everything added together so that can be that is first and foremost an indication that the person is emotionally unstable that if there has been refusal they are unable to emotionally handle a difficult situation so there you have your warning sign there and then that that is a relationship that could head in for trouble you know if people i've seen people you know wanting to cut themselves threatening to die threatening to not stay married these are all emotionally immature responses and these are some ways that you understand that okay charles your question was how long was the servant of abraham at rebecca's and did isaac data was their courtship i don't think the the fact of courtship was even was ever even there but a jewish wedding as as far as that we read it there is a sense of there's that sense of time between the betrothal and the and the wedding ceremony in itself so in probably in that culture maybe you know even as rebecca reached back home maybe there was a sense of preparation that they both had to do till the time that they were they were married uh how long was the servant of abraham at rebecca's i have no idea you know he stayed there for a day right so probably a day or two maybe and that's i'm just inferring i don't know does anyone else have any other answer on that and did isaac data you know dating is um yes hope you have an answer yeah the answer is no mom sorry did you say we also don't know is that what you said yeah the answer is no no yeah okay right yeah so um charles dating is is something that has come in you know i think in the last probably if i'm not mistaken 7500 years and there was no concept of dating in biblical times so i'm sure isaac did date her isaac may have seen her you see the way that she you know she gets off the camel um you know ask for the master and that was it and and then dating versus wooing must have i'm sure uh i mean how many of you men decided to woo your woo your to be wives okay uh rupper you have a question rupper i just i wanted to share it's in 54th verse it says that he woke up we just spent a night there and he woke up in the morning and said send me away to my master so it just yeah it was just a night correct yeah so that's what i said yeah it was a day okay uh your question was but joseph and mary were doing what before jesus was born okay so they they again i think we need to understand the meaning of dating okay they were betrothed to be married married remember they were they were not dating they were they were betrothed joseph was betrothed to be married so that was uh it was like uh like uh committed or a known thing that he would be married to her so that was not dating that was maybe courtship and um yeah so definitely not dating i hope i answered that charles uh the next question christopher in the bible divorce has permitted because of adultery and abandonment please explain abandonment in more detail with examples okay so some of the examples of abandonment comes when paul is talking about the unbelieving spouse okay so it says uh i'll have to find scripture just give me a minute just looking up uh the scripture for that so it says in uh in corinthians uh i think it's first corinthians seven yeah first corinthians seven chapter seven verse 13 it says um if a if a woman if a woman has a husband who's not a believer and he's willing to live with her she must not divorce him um for the unbelieving wife brings holiness to her marriage and the believing husband brings holiness to his marriage otherwise your children would not be holy but now they are holy sorry i'm just trying to get the entire of the scripture just a minute my app is not opening okay so verse 11 and 12 okay um uh sorry 10 so now for those who are married i have a command that comes not from me but from the lord a wife must not leave her husband but if she does leave him let her remain single or else go back to him and the husband must not leave his wife now i will speak to the rest of you though i do not okay so so that's where it says you know that those who are married uh the command is to to be with him but if she does leave him let her remain single or else go back to him so the the fact of uh in in a place of where there is a partner who is not a believer uh and there is abandonment and if they leave the you know that's that's the only point a point of place where it talks about abandonment that if they choose not to be with the partner as a result of um maybe uh unbelief then that's the only place where it talks about uh divorce right pasta yes sorry yes yes i have a follow-up question on that question uh that's answer um the bible say that god say that we should not divorce in any case except except when there's a bad case uh why would paul say what would paul say that because before that he said god said if if your wife's separated with her husband she should go back to her husband or if her husband's separated with his wife should not marry she go back to his wife so why would he say why would he would he go contrary to the word of god because he say that it's not the god to say that it is he is he is on ideas or is on mind it's not paul it is god uh it's not god it's paul's saying that yeah so so what he's saying that marriage needs to be looked reverentially but his recommendations are there are certain special circumstances of maybe let's say a difficult time so um the the the concept of marriage is the wedding of two souls and if if an unbelieving husband leaves you should stay with him if he's willing to stay but if not if he abandons it says then it may be better to stay that way it's it's okay it's to stay that way but if he returns live with him so he paul is giving uh and uh a choice of a not a choice paul is giving the options of what could happen if it were on these two terms one term when the person leaves being not being in a sanctified marriage and who's not as yoked as a believer if he leaves what what is possible that can be done and what if he doesn't but at the end he also says it's a good thing for people to be together you know if they are willing to stay that's a good thing that is something that we should keep keep uh um uh sanctified and keep in the system within marriage that's what paul's saying i hope i answered that yeah yeah thank you i think there was some more question a rose said i have a very long question it's regarding a situation of a friend who is overseas and her husband left at home country with their children okay she's really distressed with the decision she's about to make though god made her a promise from his word okay um i don't know if you want me to take this up here rose or not because you said you could take it up in the stream yeah i can write you on the stream buster okay all right okay um right uh so there's one more question here is it true that engagement in those days was considered as good as marriage breaking it was also not considered good yes so a betrothal actually meant a lot more that there was a it was it was a commitment to um to two things one is a sense of building up responsibilities and also um to uh to prove your purity you know to prove that you you are purified or your purity so these were two things that were considered during an engagement that that the person that the people involved in the marriage would be one preparing themselves like i said you know we had spoken about that how in a jewish culture the groom goes and prepares a place we had spoken of how you know it's an analogy that we see in the same way that jesus goes to prepare a place to bring back his bride and the bride stays pure and sanctified in him as we await that wedding banquet right so in that similar way um uh it it was something that was that was meant to be kept uh sanctified and that's why you see that uh joseph and mary joseph wanted to secretly um uh you know call off the wedding but because in order not to bring mary public disgrace so and also in the culture jewish culture uh an adulterous woman could be stoned right so being in engagement meant that you had to prove your yourself to be to be pure so breaking it was definitely also for what reason would definitely have been a concern right okay all right so we will uh i think it's that thank you thank you tarun for bringing up that scripture yes it is not contrary it's the same what jesus said in matthew yes that's right yes it is right okay i hope there are are there any questions if not we will ma'am i just have one yes we love like i i'm just thinking here ma'am like uh we are discussing about making the choice and divinely led and all of that um from our perspective probably the natural but i'm also thinking here that i for me i strongly feel that marriages are god ordained and orchestrated because as we see the um the scenario in uh isaac's marriage case like we see how uh ibrahim says the angel of the lord goes before um like you know the servant and like the rest of the story we just see how everything is like orchestrated by god like he goes there limits rebecca he could have met any other person like i don't know in my thinking i'm just seeing here like god really orchestrates every circumstance and situation for us to be the right person because what i'm thinking is after marriage like marriage is like yes we the marriage is there the relationships we need to work on all of that stuff but the most important part of the marriage would be the next generation like the children who come from the marriage so according to the scriptures we see that every child like carries a destiny so if that child has to come to being the right parents have to come together because the child comes from these two parents like and the child carries a destiny and the child has purpose because that's what the scripture says that each one of us have a destiny and that god has written about us like in that book even the days of our like you know the the number of our days have been planned like the book of sam says like and god says like i knew you even before you were formed in the mother's womb so when we look at this part of the scriptures we see that god already knew us before we were formed in the mother's womb meaning like everything was orchestrated by god so how do we just put all of these things together or connect these dots to understand the the whole thing about the man and the woman coming together in the marriage and the purpose of god on the marriage and the purpose of the children that come out of the marriage the destiny the the the the carry like does it not all connect back to god orchestrations in a person's marriage okay so i think your question is meaning to ask that if god has orchestrated something but we make our own choice we don't fall in the orchestration of god is that what your question is meaning to ask yes and also i feel like is it is it possible that somebody gets out of that god orchestrations and make decisions in the marriage or does it is it all divinely planned and orchestrated so okay to to maybe there are two parts to this so the first one is one you said does uh when god orchestrates something and we move out of that and make your own decisions so the key to knowing that god has guided you into something is clear that we fall in line with scripture that we are led by the holy spirit to make a decision that way right and when we when we submit to that that guidance submit to what we see has been okay you know these these certain factors that we've submitted it to the lord we trust that god is leading us to what he has willed for us we trust that okay and we believe that even in those circumstances god will do everything that he needs to give you godly children to build those destiny in those specific children who god is going to give as a result of that union all of that will be in that in that line um like like you said you know sometimes we may fall out of god's plan for our lives all of us even as believers maybe in your journey prior you would have seen how you've probably fallen out of god's plan that does not mean god changes his plan god's plan for us is is always on track and it does not change depending on what we do or what we do not do but he calls us and brings us back into the plan of god and when he does that sorry to interrupt you yeah like what i'm thinking is okay if it is concerning a job or just moving to a certain place there is a there is the uh the chance of a person making a mistake and falling out of the plan but this marriage is something i i feel is the most important thing in a person's life because it brings out the generations it's not just about the two people but the generations that are going to follow because biblically when we see ebram had to come together with sarah to bring isak isak had to come together with rebecca to bring for jacob and isaw and likewise the lineage of isaw has not been told much but the gods destiny and clan and bringing out the nation of israel like they had to come jacob had to come together like this to with aliyah and rachel only so that he brings for this well so i'm i'm what i'm trying to say here is is this not the marriage like god ordained that because it's not just about the two people because it's going to be about the generations and coming forth and the plan of god and the destiny of god because when we see biblically only when these things happened the 12 tribes of israel came into bring being and out of the 12 tribes came jesus the messiah like we see everything was like orchestrated so i'm really thinking here like some things like yeah we may fall out of the plan of god like choosing a job or choosing a house or whatever but when it comes to marriage is it not like it is god ordained could it be like it's outside of it does it happen that way okay so you you bought about an excellent example when you said about uh uh sorry i'm just charging my my thing as i'm talking so you bought about an excellent example about you know the people involved uh in in in the birth of the messiah so when you look at the genealogy of um of what is written there you will see the names of very many people who wouldn't actually fit into um you know the bloodline of a king so if you look at matthew you will see that the names that are written there are rehab bat sheba uh root and all of these as you see are Gentiles they were Gentiles who were willing and who decided to follow uh the lords sorry just gonna name it yeah sorry who were willing to follow god and be guided by him and he shows even the imperfect people within that bloodline to come about and bring about a messiah so when you see that when you see that genealogy you do see the imperfect people look at Judah and Tamar um you know one of Judas uh it's it's out of that uh you know the the kind of people that were there in it all had faulty uh characters but yet god's purpose was fulfilled so when we do see this in the bloodline of Jesus how much more hope do we have that when god guides us into something he has uh you know he he has already had his purposes and I want to I want to read a verse for you uh this is in Philippians chapter 2 verse 13 so it says for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose so when you commit a specific choice of a marriage partner it is God who works in you to will and to act in order that he will fulfill that good purpose in you you can trust that you can absolutely believe that when you ask the Lord for guidance when you ask him for uh you know to lead you to a particular person um and and maybe not have that supernatural guidance as as we were talking about he will work in you to will and to act according to his good purpose this is in Philippians 2 13 I hope I've answered your question in short Samuel did you have a response did you have a response to that Samuel uh you had raised your arm up yes yes thank you man I think one one practical way of like I was trying to understand your last question so I think practically what I was understanding was you know what if god wants me to marry like god has already ordained someone from to for me to get married and out of our marriage you know there's a generation that's coming up and god has uh destiny and purposes for those generations and all of that so god has ordained some someone for me to get married but uh what if I disobey uh and make my own choice and fall out of god's plan and marry someone of my choice you know then will uh will what god has ordained for me like especially in terms of the offsprings to come and and the other fulfillment of purposes for my life and for my for my marriage will will that be flawed will that will that not take place because I I disobeyed god so probably you know like what if Isaac instead of marrying Rebecca married someone else uh married uh didn't wait for uh Abraham servant to go and get but you know or or like even practically in today like I think uh that was what I was trying to I mean I bought that was the picture that I was kind of getting uh from the last question and you you kind of answered it that even if we do make wrong choices there will be a lot of pain and suffering that will come with that but but god god's plan doesn't change he will eventually even out of the mistake that we've made and god if we just go back to god and and surrender our lives even the mistake that made god will correct that and and and bring about his will for us thank you thank you samir bill I hope uh you've you've got the answer um if not you could you know check back on the stream and we could take it up for further discussion or even bring it back next week thank you so much as always enjoy uh let's let's close with a word of prayer um may I ask any one person uh to pray abhishek would you like to close with a word of prayer please abhishek mithra okay ma'am okay ma'am uh thank you lord jesus we come before your presence thank you for the teaching thank you for the guidance thank you for the teacher and thank you for all the good thing we today we learned from uh from the subject marriage and family thank you god for this teaching lord we need this kind of teaching lord uh for to prepare us for the future thank you for the goodness and I also pray for bliss the teacher ma'am uh with your spirit of understanding and revelation that uh in next week we learn more about this the subject and bless all the students thank you for hearing our prayer in jesus name we pray amen amen amen thank you abhishek thank you everybody have a blessed week ahead we will meet next week thank you thank you pastor