 Kraft presents the Great Gilder Sleeve. Each week at this time Kraft presents from Hollywood, California Harold Perry as the Great Gilder Sleeve, written by Leonard L. Levinson. Today's program is dedicated to the citizens of Gilder Sleeve, Connecticut, who are today celebrating their 100th anniversary. We'll hear from the Great Gilder Sleeve in just a moment. But first, I wonder how much you know about vitamins and other important food elements so essential to our health. Well, with all the talk about proper nutrition these days, you probably know quite a lot. Yes, you know how important it is to serve your family the right kind of foods, protective foods that are nourishing and wholesome. That's why you should know about delicious wholesome parquet margarine made by Kraft. This quality margarine called parquet is a protective food of exceptionally high nutritional value. It is one of the best energy food you can serve. And important to everyone who knows how essential vitamins are, every pound of parquet margarine contains 9,000 units of vitamin A, making it a reliable winter and summer source of this valuable vitamin. Best of all, parquet margarine has such a pleasing, delicate taste that your family is bound to like it, whether you use it at the table for baking or for pan frying. Yes, you won't have to urge them to eat all of this nutritious food they need. So for nourishment and flavor, serve your family economical parquet margarine. Just ask for parquet, P-A-R-K-A-Y. And remember, parquet is a Kraft product. And now for the adventures of the great gilder slave. If you take the other end of this trunk, Bernie. I got it, Mr. Gilsley. All right, now let's lift it. Well, I can't budge it. Marjorie, what is Leroy keeping this trunk of his? Rocks? Yes, Uncle Mort. That's his mineral collection. Oh, well, we'll have to drag it out later. You can let your end down, Bertie. Oh, I can tote this whole thing myself, Mr. Gilsley. You can, eh? Hello, everybody. I'm not from school. Say, what are you guys doing in my room? Your sister will explain, Leroy. Well, Darrell Belclayburn, the girl I roomed with at school, is coming to visit. You mean that giddy little Georgia gal? Oh, she isn't giddy, Leroy. She's vivacious. Honestly, Uncle Mort, all the boys at school were crazy about her. She had the cutest draw. Yeah, she always talked with the sofa in a loaf. Bright boy. Cut that out, Leroy. Excuse me, Uncle Mort. Leroy, Darrell Belclayburn is just about the best girlfriend I've got. What's that got to do with my room? Oh, I forgot to tell you, Leroy, Darrell Belclayburn is going to be in your room while she's here. Yeah, where do I sleep? On a cot, in my room. Oh, gee, Uncle Mort. What's wrong with staying in Uncle Mort's room? All of him must know he snores all the time. Oh, no. Only when I sleep. And when I do, just to roll me over on my side. Oh, me? If you don't mind, I'd rather sleep in my own room. Let that silly dame go to a hotel. Now, stop that, Leroy. Uncle Mort, make him quit. Yes. You're too young to bully our sister, Leroy. Wait till you're older. I mean, this girl is Marjorie's charm. And naturally, she has to give her the key to the city. But all she's given her is the key to my room. I thought you liked Darrell Belclayburn when you met her three years ago. Oh, I was just a kid then. I used to like anything. Nevertheless, Leroy, we must show Miss Clayburn some of that famous Southern hospitality. And I'll help us move all this juvenile junk out of here. Oh, I'll take the things out of the bathroom. Tell Brady to get some fresh towels. Yeah, what's wrong? Nonsense, there's no frog in the bathtub. Or is there, Leroy? There should be two. Their names are Jake and Lena. Oh, get them out. Young man, how long have you had these frogs in your bathtub? Well, just a week or so. Do you mean to say it's been a week since you had a bath? Oh, keep your shirt on, sis. I take a shower every day at school. Your school started yesterday. You get rid of Jake and Lena. But frogs are a benefit to mankind. I read where they catch flies in the encyclopedia. Encyclopedia? By George, I'll take them out myself. Oh, there. Stay still, Lena. Oh, jumping jelly beans. What's wrong, Uncle? They've escaped. Leroy, help me catch them. Marge, fetch that butterfly in there. Here, Jake, here, Lena. Here, nice froggies. Here, nice froggies. Say, how do you call a frog? Oh, slippery, aren't they? The home of Miss Marjorie Forrester. Yes, ma'am. Come right in. Oh, Dr. Abell. And you, my dear, you look just exactly the same. Only four years older. It's just three years, Dr. Abell. Oh, yes. I'm so forgetful. I never did have a head for figures. Oh, come here, Dr. Abell. I want you to meet my Uncle Morse. Uncle Morse, Miss Dorabel Claiborne. It's armed, I'm sure. Well, I do declare Marjorie. If you haven't got the hindsight, Mr. Uncle. Oh, come now. Here's your bags, Miss. All 12 of them. I'll have Birdie put them away. Oh, thank you, sugar. Mr. Gilver, leave y'all much younger than I expected. And you're much prettier than I expected. Oh, there's Leroy. Come over here and say hello to Miss Claiborne. Hello. Oh, don't tell me this is little Leroy. Yeah. The last time I saw you, you were nothing but a baby. And now, isn't he developing into the handsomeest boy? Oh, horse. Leroy. Come with me, Dorabel. Your room's ready. Oh, but you shouldn't have bothered, honey. Goodbye for now, Uncle Morse. It was so charming meeting y'all. Yeah, so long, Dorabel. This way, darling. Here's your room. Oh, how nice and cozy. I just love being here. I just can't wait till I meet some of your charming northern boys. But what about Harvey? Harvey? Who's that? Why the boy you were engaged to? Remember you wrote me about him in April? In April. Oh, that must have been Harvey Jackson. Did something come between you? Yes, the draft. I've been engaged to Joe Patterson and Sammy Fuller and Davey Lee since then. All at once? I know. What do you think I am, a flirt? Of course not. I'm not engaged at all at the moment. So I thought I'd come up here and meet some nice, reliable men. Well, Ted knows a lot of nice boys. Ted, is that your fiancé? Well, not exactly. Yeah. Is he nice? Oh, the kind you dream about. At least the kind I dream about. Wow. He's an awfully attentive, but we haven't any understanding yet. Well, my idea would be a man who can give a girl a nice home and lots of servants and cars and shopping money. Why, Doribel, there's more to marriage than that. What about your happiness? That's just what I was thinking about, Sugar Lime. Can I come in? Oh, of course, Uncle Moe. Hello, Doribel. Don't you smell nice like that? Oh, yeah. You like it that way? Mm-hmm. Makes you look like a movie star. Well, I have been told that I resembled Ronald Coleman. Except that he has a mustache, and so have I. Now, Uncle Moe, I like you a lot better than Ronald Coleman. Why, you'd make two of him. I would, eh? By the way, is there anything I could do for you? Well, you could go down to the railroad station and fetch Tuffy. Yeah, Tuffy, who's that? My little dog. He's waiting in the baggage room. Oh, well, I'll be very glad to go. What kind of a hound is he? A little Mexican hairless. Yes. Oh, Tuffy, eh? Hey, everybody, here's Ted. Hello, boy. Well, hello, Ted. Hello, Mr. Gilbert, please. Hello, Ted. Doribel, this is Ted. Well, I do declare, Marjorie, if you haven't got the hindsight, Miss Boyfriend. Uh-oh. Now, you know better than that, Miss Labor. Oh, don't be so formal. Just call me Doribel, Ted. Well, okay, Doribel. How do you like Summerfield? Well, give her a chance, Ted. She's been here less than an hour. But I know I'm going to like it, darling. Of course, I'll be just a trifle miserable till I get my Tuffy. Oh, yes, eh, Tuffy. Tuffy? That's my little dog. He's been waiting for me at the depot. Well, I'll be very glad to drive down there and get him. But I was... Oh, thank you, Ted. I don't know what I'd have done. But I was... No, it won't take me more than 20 minutes. But I was... Is that all? Well, maybe I'd better come along. Tuffy might be fun. But I was... We'll be right back, everybody. Come on, Ted. Yeah, we'll be right back. But I was... What was I? Oh, yes, I was stood up. Hey, sis, why didn't you go along? I don't know. Oh, yes, I do. I wasn't involved. Nick and a locking for lunch again. For the third day in a row. Are you practicing to open a tea room, Bertie? No, sir. Dora Belle's favorite dish, Uncle Morty. It is, huh? Where is Dora Belle? Oh, Ted is showing you some of the sights around Tom. Shall we wait lunching for them? No, they just found that they were having lunch out. You know, Marjorie, it's really none of my business, but... Oh, cream chicken again. Why can't we have ham sandwiches for a change? Yes, why can't we have ham sandwiches? Bertie, take this mess away and bring us some ham sandwiches. Yes, sir, right away, quick. Oh, wait a minute. What am I running for? We ain't got no ham. Well, go out and buy some. You want a ham sandwich, too, don't you, Marjorie? No, I'm not very hungry. If you'll excuse me, I won't have anything. Hey, what's biting her? A little bowl weevil. Dora Belle, huh? He gives me a pain, too. Say, Uncle Morty, does Marjorie know Dora Belle is making a play for Ted Wills? Why do you think she left the table because she hates ham sandwiches? Gee, I had a feeling that dame was poison. When did you get this feeling? The minute you gave her my room. By George, I wish we'd left the frogs in the bathtub. I can put them back. No, no, no, no. Not that, Lehigh. We'll fall back on that only if everything else fails. Uncle Morty, this Dora Belle's given Marjorie the old sabotage. Now, we can't count on Sis to do anything about it. She's too proud to fight back, so we've got to do something. That's right. We've got to do something. What have we got to do? Let me see. I've got it. And it's foolproof. No, no. What do you mean, no? Let's hear it. What's the use? This idea worked like a charm, but you wouldn't stand for it. LeRoy, in the past few days, I've stood for a lot more than I can stand for, and I guess I can stand for a little more. What is it? Well, if some high-powered guy stepped in and gave Ted a lot of competition with Dora Belle, I bet you'd get rid of Ted. You're a bright boy, LeRoy. That man was a bigger shot than Ted. Somebody older with plenty of dough. Marvelous, but who could we get? I've got them all picked out already. You have? Who is he? You. Who? You. Stop you-hooing, LeRoy. What do you mean, me? Gee, you answered the description perfectly, Uncle Morty. Look, you're older than Ted, aren't you? I am. You're wealthier than he is. I am. And you're handsomer. I am? He's my greatest cross. Why, she says you look like Ronald Coleman. I heard of myself. No, no. Let's not kid ourselves, LeRoy. She's half my age, and I'm twice her weight. But she's tired of all these young, skinny-sproutónco, Mort. She wants to hook a rich guy. Oh. The practical type, eh? Now I'll do all the hard work, convincing her you're a millionaire, and all you'll have to do is be nice to her. Give her things. Take her out to the movies. The mushy ones. But I don't like mushy movies. I like half a long cassidy. You've got to do this. Come on, Uncle Mort. How about us? By George, I almost would. If she'd only stop using that overpowering perfume of hers, I can't sand it. Oh, I can fix that in no time. How? It's easy. I'll just sneak into a room, pour half the bottle out, and fill it up again with water. Keep this up, my boy, and someday you'll be... well, just keep it up. Then you'll do it, huh? Remember, sure duty is our uncle, Uncle. You're right, LeWood. I'll do it. But something tells me it would have been a lot easier if we'd have put those frogs in her bed. Hello, Sugarfoot. Uh, Ted called just now, but I thought you were out with Uncle Mort. Oh, I better phone Ted back. I've been neglecting him shamefully lately. Oh, it's no use calling. He was going right out. Say, is he Uncle Mort alone? I think he's resting in his room till dinnertime. We went to a movie this afternoon. What did you see? A long cassidy. I only went along to please him. I think Uncle Mort is doing all he can to please you, too. Yes. I wonder why he's doing it. Oh, you'll find out someday. You think of Will? I hope so. How aren't you, sweet? Your uncle's a very interested man, LeWood. Yeah. You know, he started out as a boy with only one lobster pot, and now he's got millions of lobster pots? No dollars. Oh, I never knew that. I thought he was well off, but I never dreamed he was a millionaire. Well, don't let on. He doesn't like people to like him just because he has loads of money. As if anybody would. No. He's just charming and lovable and sweet and handsome all by his own self. How did he make his money, LeRoy? Why, in enterprises? Enterprises. Yes. He's got them scattered all over the country. Quite kind of enterprises. Oh, various. You know, various. Of course, Uncle has always said he'd trade all of his wealth just not to be so lonesome. He did. Yeah. And you know something, Doribel? Quite, sir. Good pie. He's been a different man. Too bad he's so much older than you are. Oh, not too much. And besides, what of it? And you're interested in somebody else. Why, LeRoy Forest or whatever gave you that idea. Oh, I don't know. Are you on Ted? Ted Wheels? Why, he's Marjorie's seller. I'm not interested in him. And when he calls up, you keep telling him I'm out. You mean you're going to brush him off? I will not. Let him take care of his clothes himself. Now, you run long out, Angel Cake whilst I fix up for dinner. Okay. Oh, swell. Mickey Rooney couldn't have done it any better. Yes. And you think it's going to work? Sure. If you do yours here, remember from here on, it's up to you. I'll try my best. It isn't easy, you know, playing patty cake with that little rattle brain, taking that darn dog of hers out for a walk every afternoon. Yeah. Say, how do you keep Tuffy in line? Well, we go to the park. I buy him four hamburger sandwiches, then we both take an app under a tree. Well, I think Dora Bell is about ready to give Ted the gate. Good. That'll make Marjorie happy. Say, you better go in and try to cheer Marjorie up. She's been looking terrible lately. Well, George, you're right. I'll do it right now. There's another favor I'd like to ask, will you, Roy? Shoot. See if you can dilute Dora Bell's perfume just once more. It's me, Uncle Mort. Does he mind if I come in? Oh, what's wrong, Marjorie? Oh, sometimes people are terrible. Disappointment? Oh, there are plenty of nice people in this world. They just seem to be nice first. Then somebody else comes along and you see them and they're true. Well, now, my dear, sometimes people get their heads turned by other people. These other people shouldn't be allowed to come between people and the people they like. They should go back home. Time wounds all heels. Right before you know it, you'll be smiling and laughing and happy again. But I'm happy now. Yes, of course. I can see that. Here's a handkerchief. That's it. It blow hard, my dear. Now, don't worry. Just leave it to your Uncle Mort. You mean you've done something? I surely have, Marjorie. Everything's going to be all right. Sure. I'll let you in on a little secret. I've got a date tonight with Dora Bell. I can't go through with this another evening. Dora Bell's had me doing the rumba and the conga and the tango and the fandango till I walked with the Spanish accent. And tonight, we're going to the country club dance and she's going to teach me how to be a jitterbug. If I could only tell her what I thought of her, I'd be a happy man. Uncle Mort, this can't last much longer. No, well, neither can I. Now, you go upstairs and get my hat. Okay. My dear, a jitterbug at my age. Well, Mr. Gildersleeve, this is Ted. Oh, hello, Ted. Are you alone? Let me look. Yes. What is it? Well, this is rather hard for me to say, Mr. Gildersleeve, but I guess I've been pretty much about fool. That's a pretty good guess. There's no use in going over the whole thing now, but I've got to see Marjorie alone and try to get her to forgive me. An excellent idea. I'm taking Dora Bell out of the house anyway. Oh, you're up, pal, Mr. Gildersleeve. And don't think I don't know what you've done to open my eyes. I wish I could keep mine open. I don't ever seem to get any sleep anymore. That southern bell has put me through the ringer. I can sympathize with you. Huh? Yes. If it wasn't for you, I'd never be in this mess. When shall I come around? Just as soon as you can get here. Dora Bell and I were supposed to leave an hour ago. She should be down any minute now. I see. And when she does, I'm going to tell that... Oh, there you are, Dora Bell. Goodbye, Mr. McGonigal. Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye. That was Mr. McGonigal. Did I keep y'all waiting long, frocky-walky? No. And now, young lady, there's something I've been waiting to tell you ever since you walked into this house. Hey, Aunt, I couldn't find your hat anywhere. Well, I better get myself so we can get going. But Lamy Pie, you were starting to say. I'll tell you on the way over to the house. Lamy Pie. I can't understand, young uncle. He's been so droopy lately. Why, that's because he's in love with you. Don't you get droopy when you're in love? Come to think of it, I do. Sure. Why, right now, you're a little droopy. You bet you, droop. Uncle Malt really and truly has a fever following me? Why, he was saying to me only just now. If I could only tell Dora Bell what I thought about her, I'd be a happy man. Now, uncle, that we don't need to go through any proposal business. From now on, we'll just consider ourselves engaged. Say, where are you going? I'll be waiting in the car. Oh, gee, now what have I done? I better tell Uncle Malt so he can... Where's Dora Bell, Leroy? In the car. Say, I said something to her and she thinks that you... No need for any more shenanigans, Leroy. I've got good news. Ted snapped out of his dizzy Dora Bell spell. And he and Marjorie have made up? Well, they will as soon as I can get that Dixie Dietrich away from the house. And when I do, I'm going to invite her to pack up and go home. Oh, say, don't do that. I just told her that... Oh, you told her, a bright boy. Saves me the trouble then. How soon is she leaving? She didn't say. She thinks she's gonna get... I haven't time to dilly-dally here, Leroy. Gotta get her out of the way before Ted comes. Goodbye. But Uncle... I told me what was on your mind, Strock Maltin. Yes, I know. Saved me a lot of embarrassment, too. I just want you to know I'm ready any time you want to set the date, honey bunny. Well, how about tomorrow morning? There's a train leaving. Oh, you mustn't rush me, you impetuous boy. Well... Why not? Why not? The sooner the better. And it better be sooner. Tell me, Strock Maltin, are you sure you want me to go still with this? Positive. Say, you're not gonna back out now, are you? Oh, no. You couldn't get me to change my mind now. Yeah, that's good. Well, this is our last night at the country club. I have a marvelous idea. Let's announce it here. You think we should announce it? Oh, sure. There'll be just loads of people glad to hear the good news. Yes, probably more than you think. Now, let me see. Who'd be the proper person to make the announcement? Well, the orchestra leader, of course. The usual. The leader. Uh, who? It's Danny Gerard. He started playing around my hometown. Look, the orchestra leader. Yeah, here we go again. Oh, Danny. Did you call me? Well, for heaven's sake, Dorival Claiborne, what are you doing up here? You soon find out. This is Mr. Throck Maltin P. Gildersley, Danny. Yeah, well, how do you do? And he and I have an important announcement that we wish you'd make from the bandstand. Uh-oh. Up to your old tricks again. Yeah, that's right. Now, boys, stop teasing. Danny, we want you to announce my engagement and false coming marriage to Mr. Gildersley. Yes. What? Engagement? Marriage? Excuse him, please, Danny. Yes, excuse him. This is his first engagement. He's kind of nervous. Nervous. Throck Maltin, you just calm yourself. But I, but you, but we... I just can't wait till dawn. No, I can't wait. I've got to get off. The orchestra has a shorted admission right now, Dorival. And Danny and me time to figure out a cute way of wording the announcement and to visit a bit. See you in a few minutes, baby lion. Oh. Now you're in a mess. Throck Maltin, P. Gildersley. What will people say? Yes, and they'd be right, too. Oh, now what can I do? Mr. Maltin. Yeah? Mr. Maltin. Oh. Didn't I hurt you as fast as we could? Yeah. Leroy told us he was afraid he proposed to Dorival for you. He did, Marjorie. Why didn't he ask me first? I'd have said no. Did you tell her it was all a mistake? How could I, Ted? I didn't know we were going to be married until she told that orchestra leader. And now he's going to tell everybody. If I can stop him from... Oh, there he goes up to the bandstand. Now. Where? Oh, come on, Uncle Maltin. No. No, it's too late. I guess I'll just have to face the music. Yeah, there's the music. Ladies and gentlemen, I have an important announcement to make. Oh, here it comes. Not so long ago, Summerfield was visited by a beautiful vision of loveliness from down south. Yeah. She charmed the hearts of all the boys, but there is only one man who is going to be happy for the rest of his day. Yeah, slap happy. This man, the envy of all Summerfield, is the one to whom she's just bestowed her hand. Bestowed. Thrust. Of course, you know the girl I've been talking about. Miss Dorival Clapper. She's an old friend from down home. I wish you were there now. Well, it gives me great pleasure to announce that Miss Dorival Clapper has just promised to become my wife. What? Your wife? Hey, I've been jilted. Thank goodness. The great gilder's sleeve will be with us again in a few minutes. But first, I have a confession to make. You see, although I am the announcer on a food program, I'm no cooking expert. No, I'm more interested in eating good food than in preparing it, but I do know this. The most important quality in food, the quality that makes you a good cook, is the flavor you give to the dishes you serve. And that's the reason more and more women are using parquet margarine. You see, parquet is the new craft margarine that tastes so good. Yes, women everywhere are discovering that parquet is a delicious margarine that can be used so many ways. Served at the table, for instance, parquet is sure to impress everyone with its delicate, satisfying taste. You'll find parquet is a luscious seasoning melted over hot vegetables. For baking, parquet margarine is a genuine flavor shortening that makes cookies, cakes, and pie crust that fairly melt in your mouth. And then there's pan-frying. Yes, parquet adds flavor to pan-fried foods, too, and it doesn't spatter or stick to the pan. And remember, parquet margarine is a nutritious food that contains vitamin A, yet it's economical, too. So next time you order, ask for delicious economical parquet. P-A-R-K-A-Y. Just say, I want parquet, the delicious margarine that's made by craft. Oh, Mr. Gildersleeve. Yes, Mr. Bannon. I'd like to read the resolution we've received from Gildersleeve, Connecticut. Oh, well, go right ahead. Here it is. Whereas the town of Portland celebrating its 100th anniversary desires to honor that part of the town known as Gildersleeve, and the person who has chosen that name in providing joy and entertainment to the nation. And whereas the first Gildersleeve built the fleet, which helped win the War of 1812, and the great Gildersleeve of the modern airways is building happiness for the American people, we, the Centennial Committee, do solemnly declare and hear with a point the great Gildersleeve, honorary mayor of the village of Gildersleeve in the town of Portland, state of Connecticut, given under my hand and seal on this 19th day of September, 1941, Joseph P. Bransfield, chairman. Well... Well, I'm deeply honored. And let me say, from one Gildersleeve to another, I hope the old proverb about the first hundred years being the hardest is true. Then the next hundred years will be easier. Good night. Original music heard on this program was composed and conducted by William Randolph. This is Jim Bannon speaking for the Kraft Cheese Company and reminding you that if the community in which you live does not observe daylight saving time, the great Gildersleeve will come to you one hour later, beginning next week. This is the National Broadcasting Company.