 Um, so I follow quite a few like blogs and stuff like that about, you know, like, like, like rational male, for instance, if you've ever heard of it by Rolo Tomasi. Oh, I haven't heard of it, I've never heard of it. Okay. Well, he's basically like, you know, he talks a lot about like, um, you know, just feminine, uh, evolutionary biology mostly. And, uh, one of the things he talks about is women's sex drive. And, uh, you mentioned that men and women have equal sex drive. So, uh, he actually said that women have a less of a sex drive because of the fact that we have more testosterone. And if you look at female bodybuilders, when they get injected with testosterone, the first thing they say is that they notice an increase in sex drive. So yeah. So that's what I was thinking. Like, because I was thinking women probably just want to have sex less than in that case. Okay. So this is, this, so there's a lot of confusion around testosterone. Well, actually it's a lot of confusion around what sex drive means. Right. So whether you want to have sex is one thing. And then there's the, who is the active aggressor in getting sex? So if you have higher testosterone, the kind of sex you'll want is different. Okay. So if I were to inject you with more testosterone, that's not actually, actually how it works. But if you're, if you were to raise your testosterone all of a sudden, you'll want to, you know, grab her, throw her down. You know, just like, all right. And when, uh, if you give a woman the same thing, she'll be more of that aggressive kind of sex. Yeah, it's dominance. And it's the science, there's a lot of theory. This is cutting edge at them. You know, so there isn't a consensus, but there is a, so a consensus would be like 90%, right, but, but there's a majority view, which is that, um, the testosterone doesn't actually increase your desire for sex. It increases your aggression. One of the ways that you become aggressive is through sex. So you see this in, in a prison, right? So one way to dominate another man, these aren't gay guys, but they're getting to that point where the most dominating thing you can do to another dude is to take him in the ass. You know, that's the most humiliating thing to him. And, um, if you're jack with testosterone, you're going to, uh, be that kind of Hulk kind of creature. Now, all the science shows women, um, are going to get aroused, but whether they're going to be the one on top, whether they're going to be the one like, you know, is it's a different whether they're going to take the male role in the sex. So if you look at lesbians, right? That's a great example, actually, great test case. So, uh, women, they'll get wet down there through various stimuli. Um, and novelty is a big part of it. So the old research about how women had low sex drive versus men was because, um, there was no more novelty in the relationship. That's the whole point about the FF sad and all of the drugs around that, the old view is women didn't have sex drive. Research shows they do, but not with you husband. She'll get on with Ryan Gosling. She can get wet with Ryan Gosling, get wet with chain. It's, it's you man. Get out of here husband, let her fuck somebody else. And of course that's not a, if the wife loves the husband, she just doesn't went down there for him anymore. She feels guilty and bad and she wants to take the drug to, you know, have the relationship and have that passion again. And the, um, the problem is the depolarization and what, once the depolar, depolarization happens, a presence gets drawn back. The man doesn't, isn't there fully. Um, he gets disengaged. He focuses on his work or other things in his life and the, and then he hopes the relationship will go on autopilot. So, um, there is in the past, uh, a lot of, uh, but there are a lot of books, resources saying women have less sex drive and then in a relationship, they'll have less and less. I mean, you hear this all the time. Dude's like not getting sex after like three years in a marriage, five years in marriage. Heck, I knew some guys a year into their marriage, no more blow jobs. Like it's not that uncommon. I know you're, you're young, but man, that's the truth of it. They're not going to go around telling you about it, but this is how it is. And that's because of the depolarization that happens. And then the ensuing, well, there's a lot of other factors, but those, the depolarization and the presence was what I was focusing on today, um, and that's a big contributing factor. And I was so, okay, I get that. And, um, the second thing was basically about the depolarization. And, uh, you mentioned presence, making the man more polarized to the woman. Yeah. Um, well, uh, yes, that's right. I can contribute to polarization because you have to be there. Right. And testosterone and, um, well, I won't raise your testosterone quite yet. Like, yeah, presence won't raise your testosterone. But I'm saying that that's a factor in polarization. That's right. Yeah. So is there anything that's, well, actually, that's a great question. There's no study site. There are no studies on whether presence will raise your testosterone. Right. So we don't know, but, uh, sorry. I interrupted your question. You say David data, because that's how you know this material. Yeah. Um, but there is an, one thing I was talking with Steve about tantric sex. David data is coming out of the tantric sex tradition. And there it goes back thousands of years. Um, and you know, the classic yin yang symbol, that's the classic masculine feminine polarity symbol. And, uh, so David data is a proponent of a particular view of how the masculine and feminine polarities interact. Yeah. And he's a very eloquent proponent. And, um, so like, besides testosterone and presence, what, what else like contributes to the masculine polarity? Oh, well, uh, okay. Sure. I mean, there's, um, a long, long term, like there's a long course on this. Um, so it's a matter of like picking and choosing what to focus on. Um, being in your masculine is something that you practice over time. So, um, the, I can give you some examples and then I, so I can give you some big examples and then some smaller day to day examples that might have even happened to you guys today or to me today. Um, so the big examples are, uh, whether you're in a career that you find challenging purposeful, that it contributes to something greater, that you have to step up in it. There's a little fear in the career. So, um, this could be nursing, you know, it's not like traditional male female stuff. Um, but if it, if it challenges you to the point where you, you're a little bit afraid and you have to face that fear and step forward and step through, um, that will increase your masculine essence. Uh, many women in the West, in the modern world are, have to operate in their masculine energy to get ahead in the world. So they have to get on deadlines, get shit done, think ahead, uh, think like long-term, um, and, uh, they often dress more manly to fit in. I mean, it's just express, yeah, it's, it's an energy, but then, um, the feminine is sort of absent mind, like it's sort of in the moment, in flow. And, um, feeling, uh, and letting go and, um, being sort of wild and with that, without, with abandon, you know, just like, oh, just feeling the moment. And, um, Like reactive, almost reactive. Uh, well, it depends on what you mean by reactive. They're definitely reacting to the environment situation. Yeah, sure. Yeah. Surrender. Surrender. That, that's a common theme. So yeah, uh, there are some men who are in jobs that they go to, to make, get a paycheck, like they're just, it's the same grind they don't really care about. They're just showing up to, to get through, you know, um, like, I know guys in data entry jobs, they don't find it challenging. There's just to make the pay the rent. And, um, that will sap your masculine energy. Okay. So that's, that's sort of big and anytime you can challenge yourself physically, that will, that will get you into your masculine energy. So BJJ is a great way to do it. Um, it's, it's amazing that it's only recently become popular versus like karate and other striking forms, because you can actually choke a guy out. So you'll, if you get choked, choked out, you feel what it's like to almost die. You know, we're striking, you've got the pads and you're not supposed to punch a guy to death, you know, like, so, um, facing death on a regular basis and your own mortality and pushing through anyway. This will strengthen your rescue. That must just give you so much confidence. I mean, just earlier, I was talking to Stephen Bravo, um, and he was just like, show me some stuff with the lights. And then he was just doing stuff to me, putting me in these positions. And I was like, well, like, I've got no power. Yeah, right. Cause I don't really know how to defend myself. That's something like an area of my life that I've just not thought about up until leading up to this event. So yeah, it was really cool to, like, that's something I need to get handled. Yeah. And you're well into that as well, aren't you? Yeah, something when I was a child, my dad was really into Kung Fu, was a martial arts instructor in the military in Taiwan. So he got me into it. But then I went away from it for decades because in the modern world where I live, I'm not out in the Boonies like Bravo was talking about. So I'm in a, I'm in a pretty safe area. It's like Canada. You know, or there's like no guns and stuff, but especially when I was living there. So people didn't even lock in the front doors. Like that's how, and then I moved to, well, China, where it did need to toughen up. But then I moved to Singapore, which is even more like people will leave their laptops at the Starbucks and go away and shop for three hours and come back. Yeah, I'm like, this laptop, this is shocking. And that saps your masculine energy. I'll tell you right away, man. So that energy of like, not worrying about not having fear and fighting it, not being on edge. Oh, yeah, Google it, man. These guys are paying women to cuddle them or cuddle cafes. All they want to do is have a cuddle. I mean, it is so magically. Now, they don't want to talk. I've, I've, I've confronted or challenged many of my Japanese friends and it's still a sore issue. So they're definitely they're extremes. So it's a Yakuza and there's an underworld there that's very strong. But the average salary man, which is the average man, is emasculated in a very major way. I never saw that connection between the fact that it's so safe, that it's saps their masculine energy and thus, thus decreases their birth rate. And have you heard about like prison workouts? Like, yeah, like, pardon? Dragon door. Dragon door, cool. That is a website that sells like DVDs about that. Oh, right. Well, I learned about it from one of the top bodybuilders, Kai Green, I think. He was like working out in prison and these guys get their T levels. Jack is always on guard. You can't even shower and let your guard down. They're always afraid. And what that does, sure, it just slams you full of adrenaline. Your body has to adapt, you know, and then you come out of there. Jack is like, you're always in fear a little bit. So there's, so there's that. That's the big and then the small one is day to day. They're going to be little things. I am, if you're an artist, you're going to be largely in your feminine energy, actually. And I, as in my creative side, that's where I'm at the past. Well, as a default, I'm in this more of a feeling present, like, in a moment, enjoying the moment kind of motive. So this means I'm going to be late to shit. This means I'm not thinking far ahead enough and I need a manager to keep me on track. And that means actually I'm trying to get more in my masculine for my business. And the thing is you shouldn't always be masculine because then you can't relate to the feminine. So the reason I'm harping on the masculine is because a lot of the Asian guys in Asia are so in their feminine, they're not even aware of it. So I'm balancing them out. But if you are on steroids and you're, you know, like NFL ball player, you're going to need to focus on your feminine, get in touch with your emotions. Get into the arts and kind of music, dance that will get you in tune with expressing feelings. A big part of the desire system, my old program I made, that's still, I still stand behind and still solid and being sold is, is about emotional intelligence and emotional awareness. So so I don't want to make it sound like you have to, you know, become a barbarian or something. Being a barbarian will definitely keep, I mean, I think Genghis Khan is one of the most masculine deeds in history ever. But to, to be a modern man is to balance the masculine and feminine. So on a day to day basis, there can be lots of things like whether I'm going to, if I'm afraid to speak up, speak up, that'll help you with your masculine. If I'm afraid to assert myself, I know a lot of minorities, I mean, I used to feel it, whether you're going to speak up, if you feel like you're wronged, like, I'll give you an example. Here's a little disclosure. I was on a first class United flight on the way here. And one of the legs, because I went LA Denver to here was I'm in one F or something like that. I'm in the first row and there may be four rows. I wasn't even sure at that time. And they started serving meals and they asked, what would you like, the omelet or the oatmeal? And I said omelet, then I fell asleep. And then she woke me up and said, sorry, we ran out of omelet. The oatmeal is amazing though. You can love it. Okay. And I get the oatmeal served. And then the person next to me has an omelet. The other two people have omelets. I look back and she's coming out with omelets. You know, so I'm thinking, what? And then I saw some oatmeal, but most of it was omelets. And I'm thinking if they're getting omelets behind me, but I'm in the first row, clearly it's not, we ran out. So then, so as a point of like, she's Russian, you know, and so I'm looking for an opportunity to stop her. Now I could have just let it go because I was hungry. I did want to eat. Oh, it's a big deal, you know, but I needed to know what the fuck was going on. You know, so I did stop when she came around, she finished serving when she came around for the, with the, with the bread or something. That's when I stopped her and I said, you know, I asked her, there's no way that you ran out of omelets at one F or one B, whatever my seat was. And she said, oh, I'm so sorry, sir. We had to serve the 100 K first because I was on mile. So I had no status at United. And we had to, there were so many of them on this flight. I'm so sorry, sir. And this is like bad mouth in the United. I wish they had more. They should have more omelets. So it totally modified me, but I was sort of like, that was a, one of those daily make or break moments. I'm going to speak up and find out what was happening. So little things like that, the more you speak up and assert yourself, the more you're going to be masculine. I'm just going to speak up and assert myself one last time. Yeah, man. Presence. You just said that, you know, the masculine energies, the feminine energies, they have some different activities that go in and out of those. So when you said feminine activities, you sort of mentioned presence. Yes, right. But you just said in polarization, presence is such a big term. So I caught myself saying that. I was like, okay, he's probably going to ask. So presence, there could be feminine presence. Obviously it does not can be. There is a feminine presence. The feminine presence is inward. It's feeling, you know, the tingly sensation of your fingers. It's feeling the rain on your face. It's when you're dancing, you get the music and it's in you and how you feel and react to it and you feel inside the masculine presence. It's penetration. It's like I'm looking and I'm feeling you. I'm not paying any attention to myself. It's all you. It's penetrating. Well, think of it as penetrating. That's good. It doesn't get more masculine than that. Think about all of the football, all the games that men like to watch. It's about take you penetrate a line where you take a ball and you penetrate a hole every game, penetrate a line, hockey, football, soccer, or you take a ball and you penetrate a hole. Also soccer, basketball, everything across. Think of every pool, you know, every single game. It's like committing fully for it, right? Yeah, it's about breaking through and then yes and resting. And you guys know David Data. So one of his first chapters is the myth of resting. Stop looking to rest. Right. That was chapter one or two. Every man is just hoping is looking to the point where he can finally say, ah, that's it. Like an organ. And that that's how I began to talk. These guys thought, I only need David TM until I get the girl and then I'm done with that stuff and learn now I can relax. That's, that's the problem. The thought that you can just relax now. That's him and his feminine. Right. So the woman in her is inward. Yes. And then the masculine is out, but it's specifically not out because you can go out in a dispersed energy, right? Like paying attention to that, that like peripheral. That's also female, by the way, peripheral. Man is focused, directed, breaking through. It's almost like action. Well, so it depends on what you mean by the term because being peripheral is also action, the action of paying attention to your environment around you and feeling all of the different sensations outside and bring them in. So the woman brings them in. The man focuses on one point and penetrates that point. This is focus. So I meant our horrible multi-taskers in general. The masculine brain, the male brain is not like optimized for that. Thank you very much. Great, great questions. There's so much to say about masculine feminine. Just to make a point, someone picked up there that, you know, when you're talking about those moments when you have to speak up or you have to do something, I've actually read a book and it's on this phenomena and it's called The Flinch. Oh, cool. So it's like, that's like, that's what it kind of is, right? You're like, I want to say this, but I'm holding myself back. So that's a really good book in it. Pretty sure it's still free. Oh, cool. It's like, it might just be flinch.com or something like that. Julian Smith, who wrote the book. So check it out. I remember when he put it out, he said he wrote it because it was a book that was the reason why he was given away for free because it was basically so important to him. So yeah, that's like, that's the way I was thinking about it. Like I can tell myself, Mike, you're flinching. So the idea is flinch forward and just get it forward. If you just become aware of it and you're like, right, I'm just going to do it and do it and you just break through it. That's exactly what you commit forward action is usually asking. So to shift gears slightly back to the talk you just gave David. So the title of the talk was, you know, basically around the reality of women. And we've got a couple of some great questions on YouTube. Unfortunately, we didn't have the time to ask them. So we'll go this one. I think it was from Nathan who sent it in on YouTube. So you talked about neediness and the White Knight syndrome. Oh, I didn't even get to that. Yeah, I mentioned it and I ran out of time. Yeah. So Nathan asks, what would your advice be on moving past the White Knight? Yeah, that's awesome. Well, first of all, I think most people don't know what that really, they don't really know what that means. The reason we feel like White Knight, I mean, what it is, is another way of putting it is fixers. So if you've ever been in a relationship where you found out she was less than your ideal, maybe she's unfocused about her career or something. And you originally, before you got attached to her, wanted a woman who was focused on her career. And then you thought, well, I love her or I'm attached to her or whatever, right? So I'm going to help her out, right? I'm going to fix her situation. And maybe she's now really feeling depressed and I will fix her depression. Coldplay. Oh, yeah, I'm going to I'm going to fix it. And then you can see where this is going to go because then she will feel like, wow, he's going to fix everything. And then she's just going to let go of the responsibilities. But that's how it plays out. And then that relationship fails. But the reason you have this is because at a deeper level, you feel like you're not worthy. You're not good enough unless you are useful. So as children, we often didn't get attention. I know achievers didn't get attention from their parents or the adults unless they did something worthy of attention. So if the kid, like, you know, in the old days, old days, a traditional view is they should be seen but not heard. Children should be seen but not heard. At least when I was growing up, I heard that. And this was basically we're not going to pay attention. They're cute. But if they're going to they're not at the dinner table with the adults, right, they're they're not worthy of our of bringing them into the conversation about micro physics or whatever, like whatever adult stuff we're talking about, you know, until he falls down. Like that is like, oh, my God, you hear that cry? Like, it's a real cry of pain. You everyone goes over and make sure that kid's OK. And then that kid keeps like unconsciously the kid will realize whenever I'm in pain, I get attention. Yeah. And this becomes the victim. Right. And then some people, some many of my clients are achievers. They found out that if they could show off the A on the exam, then all the adults would be like, oh, well, you know, I congratulate him. And, you know, give him attention now. So a lot of achievers, they're they end up being my clients because they're intelligent, educated, they killed it in their careers. They're ahead in life. But the reason they are is because they were they were driven to do all those things because that's how they that's how they knew. That's the only that's their coping strategy to get attention, the attention that they crave so deeply as children. And now they enter a relationship with a woman, they fall in love with her. And of course, they will repeat the same pattern that they repeated that they had with their parents. They had with the adults they wanted love from and attention from. And they will look for every opportunity to fix and achieve and please. And because that's how they that's how that's the only way they can feel worthy of love. Here's a here's a common example of the guys who have a hard time letting her pay for stuff. Go on a date. You'll say, no, no, no, no, almost like a point of pride. And I get this so often in Asia, because it's the older generation is still very traditional. So their parents are going to be about the woman not working, you know, housewife and then him, the man always pays the chillery, right? And it's hard for them to because they're brought up with that and their parents it's hard for them to switch over into even things like paying, going Dutch. You know, so I'll be like, OK, you don't have to go Dutch because that to an Asian feels very crass. Yeah, half. Yeah. And because Asians take pride in fighting for the bill. So then I taught them trading. You pay this time, she pays next time. It's a little easier. But then I also say if she wants to pay, do not force her not like give her the pleasure of paying. And it took it took me many years to figure out how to say it because I just kept saying the Western way, like don't refuse investment. So if she wants to pay, that's like kicking a puppy in the face. Let it do with the thing that they want to do. She's going to seduce herself. And then all these guys are like, oh, it sounds manipulative. Then I realized the actually the best way to teach it is actually from her perspective, which is give her the pleasure of giving. There's a real pleasure in giving. You know, really, I didn't find that out so much later in my life. But if there's a real joy in paying for your front and you're denying her that, plus she's becoming less attracted to you every minute, you don't allow her to invest. Guys who have fixed her mentality of white night syndrome, they will have a lot of trouble paying. I mean, allowing her to pay at a deeper level, talking about psychopaths and sociopaths and border lines and so on, narcissists, the dark triad. Fixers will attract predators. So a predator, a narcissist, a psychopath is looking for somebody. They'll like a victim. Like someone who's easily manipulated. Yes, who's easily manipulated, a fixer. So if a fixer gets a little bit of game, it looks good. And hopefully, you know, if he's an achiever, he's got some. Hopefully, often he has some resources, got money. You know, car, like he can, he can handle himself in society. He's a great victim. She can use him. And he won't realize it. He'll think this is love. This is how it should be, because he's used to having to work in order to be loved. He's not, it's not used to feeling that I am love. I'm worthy of love just in myself, who I am. Whether I get a fail the test or they said, either way, I'm worthy of love. That's not the message that most of us get in life. And when he's with a woman, he feels like he's got to do stuff to be worthy of her and a perfect victim for, you know, a cluster B personality disorder. So often you'll find them in the POA world. A guy who was a fixer was like a nice guy, getting a, taking advantage of friend zone, all that stuff. Learn some game, looks good, you know, it changes his clothing and gets fit and then he gets in game. So he's now able to go in the clubs and make shit happen. You know, I mean, and then guess who hottest girls? Many of them, 20% or so, are going to have some of these or be somewhere along that spectrum of psychopathy. They're going to be like, yeah, maybe even unconsciously, but sometimes consciously, that's my victim. And then they'll pair up. He's going to get all this validation that he doesn't normally get. And he's like, yes. And then the problems start to appear and then he will take it upon himself because he has boundary problems. He's going to feel like her feelings and how she is emotionally is my responsibility as a fixer, as a white knight, and I will come in and save the day. And then he just gets deeper and deeper and deeper into that. So yeah, we've he and I have been yeah, corresponding to Facebook. Sure. Yeah, I know. Yeah, I have an idea. Well, I've been, yeah, I mean, he had it bad. So I wonder how much he's going to share. But yeah, he actually. Oh, yes. That's very interesting that you said that. Yeah. Yeah. And the really dangerous part about what happens when you learn game is that you take a nice guy. I mean, a fixer, he's there with pain. He came as a child and he developed this coping strategy that just doesn't work as an adult with women. But you teach him how to be a dark triad narcissist. Like he acts like that, but it's not his core. He's not naturally like that. He's a newbie. He's a white belt in narcissism. And then you meet this woman who is at her core genetically, the science shows like that. She can't help it. She's that's just that's why there's no therapy for psychopaths. You don't like you lock them up. You don't sit and talk with them. You don't try to help the joker get therapy to stop being a joker. You fucking lock them up. And I think still the world doesn't know about psychopaths. They don't respect it. And if you always go in, they're not knowing what the fuck is happening. And it's like you teach a guy how to use a gun. You throw him in ambush with these like black ops guys. And they just kill him, right? And he thinks he's because he's better than the guys back home. But you're no match for genetic dark triad. Yeah. You know what? I think it's partly because a lot of the more visible figures, especially on YouTube, is are themselves dark triad genetically. Like basically what happened was if you have Asperger's, for instance, this is not that's not dark triad, but it shares some characteristics in common. You have to figure people out from like a robot does. Like, yeah, because you don't naturally have that in you. So you have to figure out when he does this, that's how he feels. When he does this, that's how he feels. All right. So he's actually reading you like a robot. And there are some who have, whether it's because of childhood trauma, or it's genetic, some of them might actually be psychopaths. They have malicious intent. And when you put those together, I mean, it's very dangerous. So I happen to know one of my second ever mentor in pickup. Many of us just closest students are convinced he's borderline personality disorder because it, but it took us like six, seven years to finally come to grips with it. But one of the reasons he was, he wasn't one of those guys who started out in the, he came to the community already knowing what the fuck. So he was one of those guys who was a natural, that one of the non natural, the nice guys went and befriended. And that as a, when he was a teenager, basically, and broke down his game. And then that my mentor, back when he was like 17, 18, realized, oh, shit, I can make money off this. And then that's when he entered the community, profited off it. And just anyway, so it, the POA community as well is a breeding ground because it attracts, it's a breeding ground for psychopaths. And it's a trap for dark triads. And it attracts psychopaths. It tracks predators because who is the audience of the market? Guys, fixed their problems. Nice guys who are easily going to feel like there's this emotional void in their hearts. They need to fill it. Who better to feel it to teach them the message than psychopaths who plays the game, you know, naturally better than anyone. Yeah. Well, I know Anthony's gonna come out with a lot of books on it. You know, I have one of the things from my academic background, which makes it my, the way I think different from pretty much everyone else in the POA world is a lot of epistemic humility by that. I mean, I know that I don't know a lot. Like I know what it takes to really know something, a decade of full-time study of it being on the, and even then. I mean, because they're, our senior professors are 60, 70 years old. They've been doing since they were 25, 20. So I have many senior, senior people in psychology and psychiatry that I turn to. And they've been guiding me through my readings. But, you know, I tried to look for online programs, you know, like Coursera or edX or something to recommend to guys. But that isn't out there yet. And I've been trying to tell my, my academic friends, why don't you make an accessible one, you know, sort of forcing people to pay $35,000 a year, tuition and all that shit. And, you know, the academics also look down on lowbrow stuff. So, but maybe I'll, I think I'm planning to do it maybe next year, putting it all into an online course. Yeah. But I teach it live. So what'll usually happen is I teach course, course live for two, three years. And then when it's ready, we have soft launches online. And then when that's ready, we'll roll it out. So I predict a year from now. Awesome. Cool. So that's cracking some questions from YouTube. Oh, yeah. I didn't even see the side. Yeah. So Dan asks, David, what's some great advice on how to maintain a relationship and keep it fresh? Oh, hey, great. Well, I would, okay, first of all, that's a great question. First of all, I would not think of it as maintaining. I know you hear that in marketing literature all the time. You can't maintain anything. It's sort of like, if you get a six pack, it's not about maintaining it. Because if you just do the same thing, the same workout, your body will adjust, and then it will become fat. You have to change it up. Just like in a workout, at least every three months, if not every month, do something different so your body doesn't expect it. It's like a back, life is like a backwards travel. Do you call it travelators? Like those moving, that's not like up or down, but it's just a moving travelator. It's not an escalator, but it's. Yeah, like in the airport. Yeah, yeah, I don't know what that called. Yeah, it might be a travelator. Yeah, it's a travelator. In Canada, we also call it people mover, which sounds really wonky. But anyway, life is like that. If you're not moving forward, you're moving backwards. And it's like inflation. If you keep the same salary every year, 20 years later, you're poor as Joe. So instead of maintaining, think about it as growing. In which case, it's the two of you growing separately. That must always happen. A lot of, I mean, when I got married, I thought I had the one and done myth. I thought, I'm done. I'm done improving myself. I don't need to go to the gym. I didn't go to the gym for like three years. I think I went on and off, but it wasn't. Yeah, but just leading up to the honeymoon, I was like, I'm going to the beach with her. I'm going to get in the best shape ever. And then once I got married and the inside joke was, why are you working out? Do you marry? Yeah. And that's, I think that's still a common conception about when you're in a relationship, you just stop having to try. But the thing is you always have to keep moving forward, even just for your own happiness. Then keep on adding facets to yourself. But here's the secret actually for so much. I mean, actually I'm getting into it. I'm like, I'll give you some quick tips. But I always go for the deeper answer. And the deeper answer is a thorough answer would be an 18 hour answer. I've actually created a course called Rock Solid Relationships. It's live in Singapore on this. So the deeper answer has to do with you. So you can't be, you're not ready for a relationship with another human being over the long run, unless you have a good relationship with yourself. And this sounds like woohoo airy-fairy, but what it really means is coming to grips with your own insecurities, your own purpose, your own, like me. So in other words, let me give you an example of how I didn't have it. I still was striving to be somebody when I was married. Like I thought, okay, now marriage, check that box, put that in that cupboard. But I don't have to focus on career and becoming that. Because if I don't have that, I don't feel good about myself. If I don't do X, Y, and Z, I don't feel worthy of love. So I have to strive and do that. That's an achiever myth. A lot of guys feel like, well, a lot of guys, they don't understand psychology of their own psychology. What are their values? How do they control their emotions? Why do they feel certain things? Because if you don't know why you feel frustrated, if you don't know how to control frustration or anger or disappointment, or you don't know why those things happen in your life, oh shit, when you get a relationship, she's going to trigger all of those things you cannot control. And then you'll be out of control. You're going to lash out at her and not know why you're lashing out. You're going to lash out and then regret it later. She's going to do the same thing because you're going to be driving that energy out of her. You're going to say stupid shit. She's going to say stupid shit back at you and then it'll just get bigger. And then no one's going to have the control of themselves to just stop the whole madness and say, look, I love you. There's something wrong here. And this is why. Because they don't have their own self-knowledge to even know when they're out of control. So oh my god, man, I was in no shape for a relationship of 25. I would say maybe a couple of years ago, I could confidently say I can begin one well. But I've been in so many of them. And how old are you now? I'm coming up to four at 39. And I've been in so many of them that I can see the pattern. And that was part of how this talk came out. I was seeing it not just myself but all my clients, not all, but many of them that kept in touch and come back for extra help. And then I'm like, this is a pattern that I've experienced. And getting yourself right. So there's a course I created coming out of this, all of this experience called Invincible. And it's... Good name. Oh, thanks. Invincible is marketed at... So guys want something. They want control. So it's marketed as a kind of control over your own states. And what I give you is that. But in addition to that is so much deep stuff in there that's experiential. I get there are a lot of closed eye exercises. A lot of the guys in the forums, just like when I went through module one, I was crying like, wait till you get to module five. They come out of module five like, my God, my life is changed. I was like in tears. I couldn't even see. Because they had many... Not until my 30s did I confront my past. And did I unearth the coping strategies that I had and what led to those. And the traumas that led to those. And then all of the patterns that I had. And then now how are those playing out again? What are my needs that are driving me? Unless you know what drives you, you can't enter a relationship. You're... It's like going into a car with no brakes. You're just hoping you don't hit anybody, but you have no real control. So self-knowledge, self-acceptance, self-esteem, self-affecacy. Those are all the starting points. So the invincible starts you on that path. After invincible, these guys are rockin' it because now they're like, they can't be... You know, on stage I said, look, if you're at POA, it's easy to destroy you. All you have to do is throw women into your face who hate your guts and you'll feel so bad about yourself. Because your whole self-esteem is based on how women treat you. Whether they like you, that's fucking bullshit. But what the ups, what you should do is to feel good in yourself. Like get this, as a POA like. Or as me, like Dave. So then if 20 girls reject you, you won't feel bad about yourself. Yeah, because I'm like, if those 20 girls don't like me, that's their problem. If the whole fucking world doesn't like me, if I like me and I'm living the life that I think self-determined is the right way to go, I can be in fucking Hitler Nazi world. And they're all fucked up in their head. I'm not gonna go put some guns to juice and burn them and make soap out of them. Fuck you, I don't care what you all think. And the POAs can espouse this. But as long as they go out and think, I mean, watch this video, I'm gonna go pick up this chick. And didn't it go well? Even if they don't think that at the beginning, getting that validation becomes an addiction. So I'm happy to say, I don't know if, I don't fucking care if you think I'm not good with women. You could throw me in 50 years in the future in a fucking time machine, maybe I'll suck with women. I know who I am now. I know what I'm about now. And the women and the people who will respond to that, who will be consonant compatible with my energy and where I wanna go with in my life will be drawn to it. And those who do not will, I will be repulsed. So I specifically changed myself to repel dark triad people. People who like validation and approval. They should be turned off the fuck by me. I want that. I don't want them in my life. I purposely want them to be disgusted by me. So I purposely say shit that will turn them off. Like the kind of shit I said on stage. Antagonistic. Well, sometimes if I know that, if I, you know, but like, I don't give a fuck if, like if a girl says, look, who's looking at us? I'm like, who fucking cares, bitch? Where's your head at? Get out of here. Go over there. You know, go, you know, because I don't want that in my life. And if until you get to that point, you're always going to get swayed because you can't be the rock in the relationship. Now let's talk about the relationship. When you're in the relationship, she's going to have her shit going down. Right. So often, like I'm dating a girl who's 18 years younger than me. And we're pretty serious. Many of my clients are dating younger. Many of my friends, man, they're older than me. And they're dating girls in the early 20s. I would say teens, but that would be bad. And it's just common. Like if you're a rock, she can freak out about all the little things. Yeah. And you're just there and she's just going to like, so what you need to do is be able to call the presence to calm her and bring her in. And when she starts freaking out and says hurtful things, maybe first of all, remember that could be a red flag. Okay. There's, you know, there's something deeper going on. But sometimes she's just really emotional because something triggered it. So you bring her back with your presence. All right. And you look into her, feel into her, and you tell her the reassurance she needs. I'm here for you. I'm here. Even something as simple as that. And if you love her, you tell her, I love you. Don't say it if you don't, but I'm here. You know? You don't say like, when you calm the fuck down, you know, what's, what's the, don't just freak out, like calm down. Are you giving this, blaming her for being a woman, for being feminine. You come in and you say that's the presence. Say no, come here. And she's like, no, you're talking to another girl. I was not talking to her. I was not. And you look into my eyes. Yeah. You know, and you're calm and you go there. And it might take a while, you know, but that's what she's looking for. If she's a normal woman. Yeah, it's pretty powerful. Yeah. One thing is to keep it fresh. If you're fresh, the relationship would be fresh. The only reason why the relationship would go stagnant is if you're stagnant. So if you're not learning anything new, you're not picking up any new hobbies. You're not traveling anywhere new. You're not pushing yourself. You're not looking for fear points and pushing past them. Then, of course, your life sucks. Your life is stagnant. Your relationship will be stagnant. So you're saying that the male is responsible for this? No, no, I would give the same advice to the woman. Okay. If, woman, if you're not developing yourself and growing and learning new modalities of life, the relationship will be stagnant. If you're not learning new ways to blow him, this is going to get stagnant. If as a man, yeah, you're like, that's great. Give that advice. If as a man, you're not learning new ways to please her. Yeah. Yeah. It's the same thing. So just keep learning and moving forward, right? Yeah. So this was your, is that right? This is your second ever 21-inch. That's right, yeah. Just been, yeah, in Asia, it's hard to, I was supposed to go to the one in Miami. Yeah. Just, I can't fly out just for that. So it's, plus Miami is not a hub from Asia. I could have to go through LA or New York. It was like really long. But luckily I was in LA last week. I booked out like several months ago. And then Anthony put this out. I'm, hey, I can do this one though. Yeah, awesome. So what do you think of the event compared to any other conferences you go to work? Oh, fantastic. Great energy. I think Anthony curates the speakers really well. Yeah. There's a really great diversity of topics. So I'm learning from, you know, how to, like, survival stuff, how to defend yourself, some fashion stuff I just heard. And then of course, the guys in here giving out dating advice or we're all, like there's so much residence, you know, with our content. So, and it's, this one was sort of a reunion. Yeah. For me. So I knew, I knew Nick from way back and that was horrible. Well, actually I had just become decent. I met him from Michigan. So yeah, great to hang out with him. Awesome. Was there any speaker in particular that you wanted to, you know, connect with? As a speaker at the event? As a speaker, like somebody who didn't know. I think I was, you know what, I feel bad. I was just so engrossed in the work. Even, even, sorry, I'm stretching. Even this morning, I couldn't hear all of Nick's talk because I had to fix something on our email management service this weekend and our team can't get to it. So, you know, like there's so much going on. It sucks because I was fully a coach and now I'm a business owner and it's a different skill set. It takes your brain in different directions. So, you know, one of the ways that I've learned to relate to guys because when it was just dating, I had a hard time relating because it had been so long ago since I felt those things. Like when such a, that's always the expert's problem, going back to the beginner's mindset. But then when I started to branch out and learn other things, like grappling, totally beginning, that really helped because I was so nervous, even the first day of class, like not knowing what's going on. Yeah. What are we doing? Oh, we're just falling down? Okay. And then a business. That's very humbling, actually, learning the different things in the business. So, I didn't have enough time to look at the, but now, you know, yeah, there's a lot. I'm really into martial arts and stuff. If I was living in the US, I definitely would probably, I would definitely sign up for Bravo's courses. I was thinking of doing a SEAL week. One of the SEAL camps, you know, like Mark Devine. Yeah, Mark Devine's got that. Yeah, I would fly in for that. Maybe like a five day one. He's got a three day one and a one day. I'll say about doing that, but it's too much work. But I'm going to do it. You don't even sleep for a day. Oh, yeah. Well, that's the experience, right? Yeah. Testing yourself. And Mark is a red, even though he's a green. Of course. Well, I would say meditation goes hand in hand with martial arts and killing. You cannot be good with that, unless you have the calmness of mind and be able to control it. That's like the national important presence. Yes, actually. Yeah, totally. Yeah, I found out the hard way. Well, yeah, that meditation is a masculine activity. And when women meditate, they're actually in their mask. And the forebutt in that way. But that could be really good for them. Just like men need to get into the feminine if they're over a masculine sometimes. I was just thinking now that like meditation is feminine. Well, actually, so if you're introspective, you're not doing it quite right. So in the sense of like, you're supposed to detach from yourself and just observe things as they come. So yeah, I used to think it was feminine, too. I mean, just sitting there. That's not very nice. You're saying like when you meditate, instead of being like in the feeling and all that? Yes, exactly. That detachment is masculine. Right, detachment and then observing your thoughts as they come up. Like, oh, look, I'm feeling that. I'm thinking that. That's interesting. That's like level one. I mean, I'm still a very beginner in meditation, but I've been doing it for like over two years. Every day, twice today already. And I see why that's important if you're a warrior. Like samurai culture is all about a lot of things. Yeah, Zen, man. That's they wouldn't even let women be priests or enter the monastery. Yeah, because it's a very like, boom, you've got to be focused all the time. Yes, alert. Yeah. Kobe Bryant, the Lakers, Phil Jackson, they're all big proponents of meditation. Huge. Even now, Kobe Bryant still talks about it all the time. You need to be Zen now. Oh, yeah. So like, yeah. See how that's masculine now. Cool. It's about like being detached and being able to penetrate with more awareness. Yeah. Right. Being unattached from the outcome. So it's a very complex thing. Actually, I cover meditation and picking up chicks. Meditation and attraction in invincible. It's a bonus module. That one. That's on your site, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, one thing like, so I think a lot of, if you're a warrior, one thing to do to balance out your feminine is like, I'm doing movement coaching now. I'm getting movement coaching. So I'm learning to, like I sucked at dancing always. I can never, I took so many dance classes, but I was just so awful still. Like I could do all the moves, but it wasn't natural. Have you guys, you guys heard of Conor McGregor? Oh, yeah. Okay. You know how he's got, he's got a movement coach, Edo Portale. Yeah, yeah. So, I saw that in, and then I got recommended for it from my method acting coach. So I did method acting too. Method acting is so awesome, man. Every guy who wants to become seductive and attractive, start with method acting. You know, improv comedy, that's good. Improv acting is great. And that's a common thing, the seduction community, community from way back. But method acting is, my opinion, so much more challenging, demanding. And if you can do it, like we look at seductive characters in the big screen and we go, wow, right? Like, we buy into that, buy in Gosling. Yeah, he said, but this, he's playing a character. It may not be him at all. Leave it on him to capture. It's because they can portray that on the screen, not because they're naturals or anything, but because they're fucking good actors. I think a good example too is Neil, a band that I've known about. He's like, he hosted the Oscars. Oh, yeah. Neil Patrick Harris. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Does he play like a super, like, He does, yeah. What's in the TV show? At How I Met Your Mother. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Barney Simpson. Barney Simpson. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Acting, because acting is about being able to enter that emotion and control when you enter it, how you come out of it. Yeah. Yeah, he's hilarious. He's awesome. He's so funny. I couldn't believe, like, because I watched How I Met Your Mother. Like, I love that show. Like, so much. Oh yeah, so many guys do, yeah. It's so good. And then I found out he was gay. I was like, what? Yeah, it's like, sounds familiar. Is he an actor? Well, that's How I Met Your Mother. It's just a random example. This guy is like the most masked wind dude in the world. He wrote the book The Wave, and then he was like in a micro game. Oh, somebody wrote that on the comments. Yeah, yeah. But he's actually gay. Oh, I have that book. See? Oh, yeah. Really? Yeah, he's actually gay. Interesting. But I actually met the dude in the past. Yeah. And then he takes, he was talking on steroids. It's about after the age of 35. Yeah, yeah, right. He was in, like, his early 40s. And he was talking about that, too. Like, once you hit that age, you might want to start considering maybe artificial means for it to start. Oh, like TRT? Yeah. Yeah. Well, are we eating hormonally grown, like so many hormones in the chicken and the food we have? And the money follows. Oh, plastic. Yeah, there's so much that we fucked it up in our bodies. KVC and all that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I definitely will eat natural as much as I can. I mean, I've even been trending towards vegan as much as I can. Like, it's hard to say no to the meat, but I'm cutting down on it. I'm carrying two big vegan protein powders. I picked up in LA because it's hard to get it in Asia. Doesn't that kind of, like, give you a sense of, like, masculine energy? Because when you eat meat, like, does any kind of reinforce, like, a hunter, predator instinct that increases your masculine energy? Sure. I think, well, eating steak can increase your testosterone, but it does all these other things. Plus, it harms the environment. So it's sort of a challenge to me. Can I keep up? I mean, there are many other foods that will help you keep your testosterone up. And Arnold Schwarzenegger just came out as, like, a proponent of vegan proteins. If you did a video with James Cameron, I was just in Gold's gym in Venice, beach with Christian Hudson working out every morning, and three out of the four mornings, Arnie was there, man. He's just, like, a regular guy there with the bodyguard. But, like, people talk to him. Is he doing those T-shirt promos in you there? Oh, no. T-shirt? It's got a massive, come with me if you want a lift campaign. Oh, maybe he was. I didn't look too closely. It's huge. Just, like, all over Facebook. Yeah. What is inspiring, man, to be in that gym? To be in that gym. If that's not a pair of dots, I don't know what it is, man. It's a lot of protein in vegan. Yeah. Well, vegan, a lot of vegan protein is vegetables, right? You have pea protein. So eating vegetables is not masculine or feminine. It's just healthy. If you then want to eat meat, that's a separate thing. But eating vegan doesn't give you tits. Okay. So it's not a crap. It's a vegan meal. Oh, if you get tofu, tofu will. So you want to stay away from soybeans, right? A lot of soy sauce, sushi. Oh, I think that's different. I don't know. You got to ask somebody else. The soy sauce itself, I don't think is... Yeah, I don't think so. I'm interested to find out what Ted Rice has to say. So it's like a self-improvement performance coach. I think he works with high performers. Oh, cool. He has a podcast. It's like... I think it's called The Legendary Life Podcast. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay, I've seen that. I've seen that around. It could be cool to... I'm wondering if he's going to throw some dice. I keep getting these questions about testosterone. It's like a big thing. Have you guys heard of a book called Man 2.0? That was like a big thing for a while. I don't know what sources I think are wrote. I'm looking forward for it. All right. It rings a bell. Okay. It rings a bell. Just a few comments before we wrap it up. We're going to go in and see Mr. Marcus Oakey finish up. Just some compliments, really, David. Can you please tell David Tian that he's fucking awesome. Thanks, Dan. Send him that. And LeVon, I think. LeVon. LeVon. Cool. Aren't you working out with a bodyguard nuts? Yeah. So thanks, David. My pleasure, man. Cool talk. Thanks for listening, guys. Yeah. So thanks for asking the questions. Oh, yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Pleasure. Great experience here. Thank you very much. My pleasure.