 Thank you all for coming. So first off. Hello. My name is Nestor Tupufea and Gara I'm the on a piece of retention specialist and advisor This year's theme for the MLK week is fear falsehood and freedom Where do we go from here? One of the best ways that I believe to address these issues is to change the narratives that come from fear falsehood Into narratives about freedom. So I believe it's only appropriate that we bring in a master storyteller to show us the power of narratives So on behalf of the MLK committee, it is my honor and privilege To introduce our next speaker. He is a well-known storyteller who has shared his narratives with over 1,000 schools and institutions across Washington state and the US speaking about the power of inclusion and empathy He is also a TEDx speaker and has delivered over a thousand keynotes and presentations on topics of counter narratives inclusions and Story-based strategy. He's also the founder and director of the organization storytellers for change an organization that believes in the power of narratives for positive social change Today, he will be sharing his own personal journey based off his nearest newest upcoming book titled You are my other me reflections of a storyteller for change He hopes to illustrate with his journey what dr. King described on his letter from Birmingham as an inescapable network of Mutuality that exists between human beings Please join me in giving a warm highlight and welcome to a social impact consultant intellectual scholar and professional storyteller Luis Ortega Thank you Nester for that wonderful introduction I'm always a little bit embarrassed when I'm introduced and oftentimes I do a quite a bit of speaking and storytelling across Washington primarily at schools and across the country as well and a lot of times when people ask me is like Hey, send us a buy or something we can read them like if you must but usually what I prefer is no introductions Just here's Louise and then you get to know me as I tell you my story because I think that's the only way You can truly get to know someone so First of all, I'm deeply honored to have the opportunity to be here at Highline Over the years. I've had an opportunity to to visit the college in numerous occasions Primarily to work with groups of students who are just interested in harnessing the power of their own narratives to advocate for change in their communities So thank you so much for hosting me and inviting me. I Would really love to start by Introducing you to what has been a transformational concept in my life and really what I've worked so hard over the last 11 years to practice In La Keshe In La Keshe is a timeless magic and precept that very roughly translates to you are my other me and In La Keshe, I believe in so many ways speaks to the type of radical empathy that is so crucial to promote inclusion and equity It's not the empathy that we've learned to Really in many ways absorb within our traditional narratives in this country I think the mainstream version of empathy in this nation is more closely aligned with what I will call sympathy I think the notion of stepping into somebody else's shoes is a failed metaphor really for speaking what meant empathy is really about I'm not asking you to step into my shoes You will still see the world the way you have always seen it even though you are inside my shoes I'm asking you for one second to be my other me That's immensely more challenging But it's also so much more worthy of what we as human beings are capable of doing In La Keshe also happens to be the title of One of my favorite poems a poem written by Luis Valdez he's known as the founder of Chicano Theater the founder of El Teatro Campesino and He's also renowned playwright. He wrote Sutsut for any of you who may be familiar with the playwright and and I want to briefly Start today by presenting to you this poem In La Keshe, tu eres mi otro yo, you are my other me Si te hago daño a ti, if I do harm to you Me hago daño a mi mismo, I do harm to myself Si te amo y respeto, if I love and respect you Me amo y respeto a mi mismo, I love and respect myself In La Keshe, you are my other me so short and yet so powerful and I remember the first time I ever came across the poem and Suddenly at that point I had spent about seven years as a storyteller doing my work and It was like as if The sum of seven years of storytelling just only came crashing into me And I began to truly understand in so many ways why I was doing what I was doing I don't know if this has ever happened to you, but Sometimes you get so caught in a struggle That you are just going day by day Responding and reacting to the Urgencies that are right in front of you and you still do it because you care and there's a deep value around it But there's something about the urgency that also blinds you to this larger purpose that has been driving you all along When I read that poem I understood that's what I had been trying to do for the last seven years And now 11 years later it continues to be at the center of my work the poem Also happens to be in a different way a metaphor for My existence in this nation. Let me further explain The poem was used and has been used in so many different classrooms across the country But I came to know about the poem when it was used by a group of maestros a group of educators from Toxin school district Where they began to use the poem as a way to educate their young students about their roots about their culture and their backgrounds They started a very prolific ethnic studies program Up to the point where some of the students who in the past Were well on their way out of their school system So they did a complete 180 turn around they were now in their pathway to graduate in their pathway to college They went I believe from a 56 graduation percent Rate to almost 96 percent within four years And it was mostly credited to this ethnic studies program within two years of some of the success a different type of Reaction began to to come out of the district and overall the state and Suddenly the poem had been made illegal. It was banned to this day In fact the poem cannot be read in a public school in Arizona the maestro since then have Enlisted a group of activists and lawyers and they're currently fighting it on the courts But this is one of many other Literary works that were banned by state law ban from being read State officials going inside classrooms taking it away from kids and saying you cannot be that proud I'm undocumented and In so many ways Just as this poem was made illegal I've been made illegal by things that are In many ways outside of my control In La Cache Have you ever experienced a connection like a moment of deep connection? I don't know what that may mean to you but I would love to illustrate what deep connection means to me and It's kind of one of those things that Before you explain it and before you you tell it you sort of have to experience it So I'm gonna invite all of us here to connect And he's gonna be in a very real way. This is gonna require for all of us to move a little bit It's an invitation or a demand. So if you're like, no, this is this is not the thing for me. That's okay. I'm okay with that Challenge by choice, but I want to invite you to connect and and he's gonna take a little time But trust me it's gonna be worth it. So here's what I'm gonna ask us to do Right here. I'm gonna ask a couple of people maybe eight of us to make a circle And then I'm gonna ask a couple other people It's gonna be about 16 to make an outer circle and they were gonna keep making outer circles until we're done All right, and then we're gonna engage in an exercise here real quick. All right So I'm gonna ask everybody to stand up. You don't need anything on your hands. No coffee. No pens. No pencils nothing Let's just go ahead and we'll make a small circle here first Yeah, perfect you guys you are the first ones coming up coming up We can have a couple more people over here and then let's start making a second outer circle here perfect Perfect. We still have space over here awesome awesome Awesome awesome Come on down come on down. We're probably gonna make another circle that's gonna go through here Perfect a third circle. We have a third circle going on there. That's awesome Awesome awesome awesome And we're gonna excuse me brother We are gonna have one more circle here. So we already on four circles So another circle can start coming down this way. So everyone over here coming down coming down Perfect will connect with these beautiful people over here Perfect perfect perfect and for those of you that are coming down there. We're gonna start one more circle over here So let me move this out of your way There's obstacles to connection in life, but we removed them Sorry, I am a storyteller. So I use metaphors in all kinds of ways Move over move over move over move over perfect perfect perfect. Come on. There's still space for everyone We'll adjust we'll adjust we'll adjust All right. All right. All right Okay, okay So here's just the one thing that I need everyone to do a little bit. So everybody take up maybe like about half a step back Okay, perfect. All right, we're expanding a little bit All right, right on right on so here's what's really important for me for all of you who who are about to engage in this exercise Make sure that you have someone to your left and someone to your right. So go around and let's say hi to them It's like hey, what's up? I introduce yourself real quick all right, so Here's what's gonna happen now I'm I'm not gonna give you instructions for now. I'm just gonna ask you to do exactly as I do Uh, just follow along and it would all make sense soon. I'll give you instructions this time Clap twice Clap twice Check them low Check them high Right hand up pointing to the sky left hand to the side We go a little Okay, cool. And at the count of three your right Finger is going to land on somebody's left hand one two three two So your right finger should have landed on somebody's left hand Connection takes practice connection takes practice All right, let's try this one more time real quick clap twice Clap twice check them low check them high right hand up left hand to the side. We got a little And one two three sound effects everybody One two three two. Okay, cool. So We are connected and right now really, oh, please remain like that. Please remain connected Because this is just getting started. So In a moment, I'm just gonna walk you through through a quick silly activity that I love doing But the metaphor is powerful I'm gonna tell you a quick story and every time you hear the word chili pepper in my story You're gonna have to try to do. I know chili pepper Every time you you hear the word chili pepper in the story You have to try to do two things at the same time. You have to try to capture Somebody's finger and avoid being captured. All right. So you have to try to be doing two things Very quickly at the same time so So what what we're gonna we're gonna practice So fingers in her So your your feet on All right, so Here I go. Are you ready? Okay good All right So My name is Luis Ortega and I'm a I'm a professional storyteller Born and raised in Mexico City immigrated to Seattle in 2001 two weeks after 9 11 and I want to tell you about About the time I graduated from high school. So my mom She spent all her savings to buy this for me. I mean, I was so very touch. I was like, oh my god mom like, why did you do this? It was an airplane ticket to go to a place called Chicago Come on people. There's not a place called chili pepper I know All right clap twice Clap twice Clap twice Check them low Check them high Right hand up left and to the side one two three So, uh, anyone here been to Chicago anyone anyone? Yes. I love I love Chicago Yeah, so the museums amazing the architecture beautiful I'm vegan now Back then I wasn't so my favorite thing at the time about Chicago The hot dogs. Oh my god, so good So they put all kinds of yummy stuff on hot dogs over there Fine, I'll tell you tomatoes onions the bones have poppy seeds Monster no ketchup and chili peppers All right. All right. All right. I want to do this one last time one last time. Uh clap twice Clap twice Check them low Check them high Right hand up left hand to the side One two three two All right. All right. So I'm gonna I'm gonna try to trick you. I'm letting you know ahead of time. So just be ready championship round. Okay Chihuahua. No, I said chihuahua. He's like chihuahua Um Chuchang no bananas. No banana sounds nothing like chili pepper Um clap twice Clap twice Uh I I just told you a story and Over the years my argument has been that if I tell your story And you truly listen to me That's as connected as we can be And it doesn't always quite happen and I don't think so much is the fault of the storyteller If there could be any fault or blame Put anywhere I think really what we haven't learned to do very well is a story listening And and I want to give you an example of what that should feel like because Over my 29 years of life I can tell you of a handful times when I felt truly listened to and it feels something like this So everybody put your your right hand right hand up And then I want you To bring down your hand and touch the shoulder of the person in front of you I You have my arm You have my I don't know you you may feel like this is awkward um It is a little bit awkward to be listened to because we're not used to being listened to And suddenly you just feel the weight of people on your shoulders But you realize it's not so much their weight. It is their compassion And their empathy that weights heavy on you I mean, I'm going to start crying here in a second because I can feel you and it's And it's a compelling thing to know that people see you and hear you and validate you They don't have to agree with you They don't even have to fully understand you But they feel you and it's okay to not understand feelings sometimes. I think most of you would agree with that But this is what being listened to feels like This is what sharing a story and listening to a story should feel like it's actual deep connection actual deep connection It's a beautiful thing I want to tell you about why 11 years ago. I started My journey as a storyteller for change. So I'm going to invite you all to take a seat And open your hearts to to the story I'm about to share with all of you so in the fall of 2004 I had just made an appointment to Sit down with my high school counselor and the last Three and a half years of my life had been very challenging. I had Left a country behind to find a new home in rainy seattle My family and I had overcome a number of challenges one of them being homeless for some time And despite all of that I had done fairly well academically I knew college was the reason why my family and I came to this country I knew my mother's sacrifice The only way I could ultimately repay her Would be with that a layer of acceptance to a university I had my eye set on the university of washington in this fall of 2004 I I was about to get a lot of answers that I needed. I had made an appointment with my counselor and I was there to ask about college and It should have been a simple Conversation it should have been just another meeting right It was not For the very first time I disclosed to someone outside of my family that I was undocumented And to be very honest with you. I did not say undocumented. I said illegal that day And and that's a critical important part to the story because there's very few times when I use that word But I always do use the word when I speak of this time because I think one is important to understand for the context of a story that at the time I felt illegal I believed I was illegal And even though since then I've come to understand there's no such thing as an illegal human being It is entirely possible to make people feel illegal And there lies the difference So I felt very much legal and perhaps that's why when My counseling responds to my plea for help and vulnerability as I disclose that my family and I Were in fact undocumented in this country well just She she stood up after Hearing my disclosure took three steps towards the door opened and said get out People like you don't go to college. I didn't listen. I I didn't snap out of it right away. It did take me A handful of weeks And a lot of hurt to get over it, but eventually I applied I got accepted. I left my high school Where racial slurs and jokes about my accent follow me every semester And I told myself never again I'm going back to school I'm done with that and I left and There I was University of Washington. I was there to become a doctor. I am not a doctor And that's where the story begins really because My very first quarter at the university I received an invitation by A dear teacher the one teacher that I felt actually saw me the only teacher of color I had throughout high school and she Was inviting me to go back to speak To ross about high school She pleaded on her email. There is a group of students that just need a little more motivation. They're struggling And I know you struggle when you were here And you may just be who they need to see and who they need to hear just maybe So please consider it. I invite you come out My reaction was immediately and I and this is what I mean with not understanding feelings sometimes. I felt anger I felt anger How dare you? Well, first of all, why do you think you know I struggle? Because I don't think you know me I don't think you knew about what happened between me and my counselor I don't think you knew about all the bullying that I had to put up with I don't think you knew that outside of school my family at some point because one of my sisters fell very sick Uh, we spent all our savings. We lost our house. We lost our car. My mom lost her job Just so that we could save her because we didn't have her insurance I don't think you know that my one of my sisters and I had to sort of move around from home to home Just so that you could so my mom could take care of my other sister and and we had to endure all of that Then you will still expect me every day to show up on time ready to learn And still perform really no matter Uh, besides all of that, I don't do public speaking Uh, and the reason is because when I was about, uh, seven or eight years old My mom placed me in this summer program where The instructor was there to teach us a Indigenous song I remember And and I'm gonna sing it to all of you. Pardon my apologies. I'm not a very good singer So here it goes It's imagine lullaby very ancient Uh, so if you can just imagine for a second I was about this height a little bit chubbier and I'm all the way in the back of the classroom I know the little kids are like conish conish ballet changing right and I'm all the way in the back just going like this I I was a child kid. Uh, I still in some in some ways shy I'm introverted. That's really what it boils down to and By the way, I think introverts make some of the very best public speakers out there by the way Yes, power to the introverts we can we can talk more about that later. Um So so yeah, I don't do public speaking and the reason is because after I was of course my teacher noticed that I was back there not saying anything invited me to the front of the class To sing the song and like as if that was gonna be an an incentive and I broke down crying And and that experience you'll see my peers laughing at me Seeing the the teacher just looking at me like awkwardly like what's wrong with you kid That just sort of generated a type of trauma and my mom She had to leave work to come and get me And she lost her job because she like came to get me so all of that combined just Really created this huge anxiety and fear of public speaking and public singing too and Throughout the next couple years. I remember any time that I Was put in front of my peers in a classroom. I would break down crying My family and I moved a lot when I was little So I went to about 13 different schools between the first grade and the eighth grade And I was kind of happy about that because every time I will go to a new school I was like Jeff nobody knows that I cry here and then soon like something will happen I will end up crying and then That nickname that has been haunting me since the third grade La Llorona would soon follow And it's like the crybaby, but he doesn't quite describe it There's like all this cultural connotation to it in Mexico La Llorona. It's like legends and stuff. Yeah No legends about me, legends about La Llorona And I remember when I moved to this country I made a very A special promise with myself. I was like you are not gonna cry in high school and I don't know how many of you ever had to do some sort of public presentation in high school I never had to do one because I always negotiated my way out of them And in one occasion, I think the extreme Of how far I was willing to go to not speak in front of My peers was that I agreed to write a 45 page paper Single space instead of doing a 15 minute presentation That explains how much I dreaded that idea of speaking in front of people So yeah, of course, no matter that I'm angry at my feeling I just don't do public speaking I know for a fact that as I was responding to this email, I started thinking a lot about my mom And the reason why is because I couldn't help it like it just triggers some memories, right? Like our first Christmas in this country where we slept in a basement and my mom would sleep in a corner And I was sleeping in a corner and each one of my sisters was sleeping in a corner and just Going through some of those traumas of being homeless and Seeing one of my little sisters almost died Those things just got me really thinking about my mom and how she had managed to get us through all of that I want to talk to you all about moms for a quick second. So how many of you love your mom? I love my mom. Yes. Good. How many of you are also annoyed by your mom sometime, be honest Yeah, okay. Yeah, it's it's true. It's true. I want to tell you what's the most annoying thing about my mom She's a really good person And I said, I know what you mean. Yes She's a really good person and and the reason why that's annoying is because the most pressing question My mom has asked of me and my two younger sisters throughout our life is what are you going to do for others? it's not even If you are going to do good or bad for it's just what are you going to do for others, right? And let that be good And it's annoying because when you grow up with so little Well, what do you want me to do for others? If we had a little bit of extra food no matter how little we had We will give it to someone else who had less If we had a little extra money or my mom could find a way to go really out of our way to help somebody else We would do it and my mom never told us what we should do or not do. She just simply showed us What doing good for others look like Over the years you cannot help it. That sort of becomes part of who you are as a person And that day in that moment for some reason as I kept hearing my mom's voice in my head Like what are you doing for others? I just felt that I had to show up at rossible high school and have a final say About my experience there and if I could give a little something if I could pay forward a little something to a group of students That were having a hard time then so be it so I showed up And I felt I was going to speak to maybe five ten students. I thought about a hundred of them I thought I was going to have maybe 20 minutes. I was told I had an hour Yeah, I was going to cry I I remember I prepared these fancy powerpoint with husky puppies and all kinds of motivational quotes. You can do it si se puede I didn't make it past the first slide in my presentation By the time the whole hour was done all that had happened is I had just sweated a lot. I didn't cry I had a very like Just awkward looking group of kids looking at me like please stop and take us back to class somebody somebody take us back to class and they just finally kind of realized that it's over so they don't know if they should clap or Miss feeling my teacher stands up and she's right and I'm like no stop That's making it worse and I'm even more embarrassed. Uh, they barely give me like a clap Like have you heard like those like kind of like lazy claps like give me one right now No, that was good I'm not kidding like it was it was really bad. So I'm deeply embarrassed. I'm just asking this feeling. Please Leave take the kids too It's like just leave me here In my introverted world and I can just like roll up in a You know little fussy ball and just like, you know, I need some time So everybody leaves and I immediately relax and Obviously, I'm embarrassed. Uh, my shirt's all wet. Uh, it's a lot of sweat I'll spread you the details and I'm starting to pack up my things when out of the corner of my eye I realized there is still one person that's that's here in the library and all the way in the back There's this kid that I kid you know, he's just doing this Why did they leave me here with a weird kid? I was just like so I'm packing all my things Right. I'm not being very empathetic in this moment, right? So I'm just putting away my things and I'm like get out of here not to self tell them enough as we're Kid in the library and I'm leaving and now I'm a little concerned because I hear that weird kid is coming towards me So I'm like it's time to run And as I I don't think I ran, you know, but I I'm definitely like speed walking or something and Silly me decides to turn around one last time to sort of figure out like I just wanted to gauge How far away is this kid for me? And I make eye contact with the weird kid Weird kid looks determined and He's just going at me and at this point. I'm like, oh Like I made eye contact with him So now he knows that I know that I saw him And I'm hearing my mom's voice in my head like like what are you doing for others and like, you know Like what are you doing for others? I'm like, oh mom. Why all of these in one second, right? I'm just slowing things down for you And finally I'm like fine. I'll talk to the weird kid I turn around I didn't even have a chance to say anything. Where could just throws himself at me First of all, I feel really bad because well one. I mean, he's just getting drenched by my sweat And then I realized like like this feels like why does it feel like more like he's crying I mean, he's just bowling like I've never heard somebody cry before and I'm just like I don't know what to do with this. I mean, I don't know if anybody saw us standing like this like that I don't know how long we stood There like that All I know is that eventually kind of hit me very slowly My ecu my emotional caution at the time was not very great It took me a while to realize that he wanted a hug And even when I started hugging him, he was one of those horrible hugs like it's okay It's okay It's okay It's fine It's fine And I suddenly like I started like hugging him more and then we were just like fully on hugging I began to feel that way in my shoulders and I'm like, what is it? Like then I started crying. I was like, I don't know why I'm crying. He's like, why are you crying? Like I don't know. I worry the like I just cried There with this kid for like a good five minutes like just hugging and crying We haven't even said a single thing to each other at this point And and suddenly when he finally starts calming down. He just takes a step back Very slowly. He just looks up at me. His eyes are red His nose is runny And he just simply tells me Your story just changed my life You're lying. I did not say that But that's the first thought that came over to my head Because when you've been conditioned to believe that you're an unworthy being This gets on your way Of this of connection There's someone right there in front of you who's fully opening up themselves to you and telling you you are worthy. I hurt you Like this was amazing. You just changed my life and my first reaction is to say you're lying Because I had been conditioned to believe the narrative I had told myself the narrative I believe about myself Was one where someone like me that looked like me that spoke like me That had been through what I had been through Could not have a story that could make a difference. I had a deep lack of self-worth And yet almost instantaneously as I rationalize because whenever we don't want to feel something we rationalize it As soon as I began to rationalize like no, this is your line and obviously was a horrible talk I was overwhelmed by a different feeling One that I didn't understand Until years later when I've read that poem You are my other me And I love and I respect you And I'm not gonna hurt you if you tell me your story And suddenly I realized like I am the weird kid I've been the weird kid All of us have been the weird kid until we find somebody else that doesn't see it as weirdness But simply sees us as us humanizes us I had been the other story my whole life and then suddenly I became this story We exchanged a few words He left I left and I want to be very honest with you about this because I think this is One of the most powerful Takeaways from this story. I do not remember his name As much as I've tried like I just cannot remember his name I have not seen him Since then and the kicker is like he told me I changed his life And I so wish I could find him to tell him you are the one that changed my life Just one person just five minutes Forever changed the trajectory of my life. I did not see it then. I did not understand it then It took me seven years to sit down with a poem In reflection to suddenly realize How powerful it can be if one person truly listens to you 11 years of storytelling and all the wisdom that I have to give you is listen in dr. King's Letter from Birmingham jail. He speaks of an everlasting network of mutuality between human beings Our destinies are all tied together He just is anywhere. It's a trust is justice everywhere, right? It's like You may have been all the way out here But if you are hurting no matter if I'm in the center no matter if I'm all the way over there I feel you there's no escaping it There's no escaping it. There is ignoring it There's hating it. There's fearing it. I want to close because I know some of you have to get to class And I just then we cannot open up to questions and and maybe some more stories, but Here's something else that that I want to share about you from from dr. King's wisdom And this comes before he's letter to uh from Birmingham jail. This comes before he's I have a dream speech This is in 1962 October 12th And he's in Mount Vernon, Iowa. He's there to speak at Cornell college and As he closes his speech that day he says the following That he's convinced that the reason why people hate each other Hate each other it's because we fear each other We fear each other because we don't know each other We don't know each other because we don't communicate with each other and we don't communicate with each other because we're separate from each other And he was not speaking about segregation At least I don't think so He was speaking about the reality that you and I could just be a feet away from each other We could be next to each other and we could still be completely separate from each other We could not communicate. We cannot listen. We can be strangers to each other I will fear you and I will hate you and if you really think about what What it takes to really close that separation and this is what I've really spent 11 years doing this work One is humanizing the story In many ways I felt whenever possible it is my responsibility to speak about The plight of undocumented people in this country, but it pretty quickly extends to Just unwanted people All right, I do not see my plight as an undocumented person only as an immigrant plight I see it as a plight of anyone who has ever been marginalized Anyone who has ever been hated fear Pushed aside pushed away Demon-worthy and this is why for for 11 years my work has not been just focused on immigrant rights or refugee rights My work has really been about Giving people Two fundamental skills Storytelling and story-leasing And I would argue That in today's world these last two years have really challenged me You know, I Travel all over so I've been in places like Alabama and Louisiana and Kansas Nebraska in rural areas I tell them the same story. I'm telling you right now And I've been challenged and I argue that in today's world One of the most radical acts that we can engage on Is to truly listen to each other Regardless of what the other person is saying And that can be an easy thing to do Or it can be the most difficult thing that you'll ever do in your life But most importantly never undermine the notion that Just five minutes of listening to someone can change somebody else's life And isn't that what we should all be pursuing With that, thank you so much. I'll open it up to questions. And yeah, hi As you travel the country, what do you want to know about being a teacher? Yeah, sure. So the question is Through my travel, is there anything that I've learned about empathy? And I think it's part of what I addressed at the beginning that we actually don't know what empathy is We confused it as sympathy Most of my work Happens in school districts across the country And I can definitely tell you that if there is Well, first of all listening is the one skill that I wish all our teachers had and we need like serious professional development around that But listening is empathy And for me the biggest strength that I come to understand Is that there is just a tremendous misconception of what it is They just We've lost the true definition of what it means And I think especially for anyone that has any form of privilege I'm guilty of these in some ways my my privilege you know Anyone that has any amount of privilege has really a lot of work to do Beyond and he's again, it's not that stepping somebody else's shoes. I don't want you in my shoes Trust me. I mean like you're welcome to try my life on for one day But that's not really what it is about Because you're still going to bring your bias and your prejudice into my shoes into my community, right? I want you to sit down and listen Some people are ready. I wouldn't take on that and for some people, as I said, it's a very radical ask So so that is the one thing that I've taken away. That is the one thing that I'm trying to tackle and address on my book And really what I hope will be my mission for the next five years is just really engage on these challenging conversations around Yeah So the question is how did I get over the fear and anxiety of treatment? Oh with the answer is I didn't To this day, I still experience great amounts of anxiety Incredibly powerful Is a reason to speak Just as we have to find a reason to listen for me in my own personal journey I really have to first clearly articulate to myself why Is it worth it for me to go through that fear to that anxiety? At least there's something greater than that and That day I was so fortunate that the first time I sort of opened up myself to be vulnerable There was someone in the receiving end who was willing to reward that vulnerability with validation In many ways if anyone here Fears public speaking and it's not so much public speaking really is the act of just storytelling and sharing Which can sometimes be even more vulnerable when you do it in front of somebody To this day I find it so much more difficult to share my story if I'm just sitting down in a table across somebody Instead of doing this, this is safer for me actually So so no I did not get over it And I hope I never do because There is this hunger that That comes with this anxiety and this fear that really fuels my story. I don't think my story Would be near as powerful if I if I did not share all the emotion that I feel in front of you And I think if anything the reason why I can be invited back to schools Because between my freshman and senior here in The university of washington I traveled to 300 schools To speak as a volunteer at classrooms and conferences and client nights I was not on this journey to be a paid speaker. That's not what happened. I was allowed. There's a business model here. No It's like I I saw a need and I was hungry for it and the only way I could fulfill it is through this vulnerability and I think Students recognize that I think students always know and if you are real with them They'll be willing to be real with you too And that realness comes with my anxiety and my fear. It's me. I'm not gonna apologize for it, right? And I think if you ever feel excited or feel about something don't apologize for it Like you have to own it turn it around and make it your strength Right. I spend so much of my life being told over my weaknesses and All along my weaknesses is precisely Who I was and where I was the strongest. I just have to change that You really somebody's opening up yourself to that Questions or questions thoughts Yes, sir, you still purpose that Um, I said is uh, the college of discovery So you spoke on listening being a powerful thing I think, you know, everybody can agree speaking is also a powerful thing So as well as uh, connecting through listening We'll be the best way We'll be the first step into making that connection When you're speaking to somebody as well as them to see me Yeah, that's a great question I think there there is definitely this inner connection between the two, right The storyteller is first and foremost a story listener I don't always think that works backwards. I don't think the story listener will always be A storyteller At least that that's my experience and take this as The view of luis's world, right? Uh, like We see the world as we are not not as it is. So just take take it from that perspective For context, you know, I'm someone who spent the first 18 years of his life Very quiet Because of the introvertedness, but also because of the stigma of being a non-documentary immigrant in this country You learn to stay quiet When I finally found that courage and vulnerability to speak up It was incredibly important for me and and so reaffirming, right? But Again, these two years for me to understand I Quickly realized that the reason why it became so good at storytelling and speaking to others is because I spent the first 18 years of my life Just quiet and listening And I think You know, especially for those with privilege those that will easily step into the role of speaking Right, they spend so much time of their lives speaking and that doesn't make you a good listener. That makes you a good speaker right so I think if if you spent a good amount of time listening first and absorbing if you've sat with your thoughts and reflection I think that's the tool that you need to be a great storyteller and a great story listener because you've already practiced listening I don't think that works like necessarily, you know It's it's difficult the other way around and and it is about privilege It really is from my perspective you know The other thing that I'll briefly say about this before Seeing if there's any other questions And I'm happy to engage on a longer conversation about this if you're interested because this is this is my jump This is what I love talking about story telling story listening. The last thing that I that I will say about this is that I am particularly passionate about Seeing people who will share their story With a degree of comfort and I and I think those are really the stories that we have to open ourselves up to if a story Makes you feel uncomfortable then diving And that means in my context That you are my other me is both the undocumented student that I speak with whose truth and story Makes me tremble because I cannot believe someone has been traced so inhumanely and that will make me feel comfortable And that person's my other me and I have to empathize with them and the person that wants to deport me And that tells me you do not belong in my country and I'm going to drag you out of here That person's also my other me And I have to understand that they were not born like that Not with that thought Perhaps other unearned privileges. Yes, sure. They did have those. They did not choose them, but they have them But the thought I hate you. I fear you They were not born with that Judgment and bias is not a wrong thing. It's what we do with those things that matters And I have to empathize with that person too and I have to listen to them And I have to try to understand them And that pushes me that's not an easy thing to do to have a conversation with somebody that deeply believes You are less than them and that you don't belong here. That's tough. That's tough So sit with comfort if you're not willing to do that. I doubted you will ever have The opportunity to feel what I felt when I was standing here in the middle with all of you on my shoulders Because he's the good and he's the bad, right It's the optimism and and pessimism is it's it's everything Together, it's it's not simple It's meant to be complex and that's I think a beautiful thing Welcome to my storyteller world Yes Yeah, absolutely, uh very very personal choice very difficult choice It's not easy to be a one mexican that shows up and it's like I don't need And it's like I have hummus. It's like you obscene that meme, right? Like the the erby board shows up the hummus and the two rex's are like we embody the erby board. I'm the erby board and Yeah, I um my mother Again, I blame my mother. Uh, she's not vegan but But from a very young age, she really taught us love for for animals and nature and Uh, uh, you reach a point in your life where you really start examining if your actions reflect what you say are your values and They did them for me and that kind of one of those things that I could kind of own and be like, no I'm gonna be vegan and it's kind of is one thing that I can control And then it turned out to be great because at that time I was homeless too And I was in college. Uh, my family have gone back to Mexico. I stayed here by myself and Uh, that made all my money have to go to pay for tuition and books We didn't have what we have nowadays was fat that helps undocumented students with some financial aid We didn't have that back then when I was in college So all my money would go to pay for tuition and books and I had no money to pay for food and rent So I spent two years homeless and during those two years. Uh, I learned to eat vegetables And eventually I realized being vegan is actually very budget friendly too So a little bit of practicality and a little bit of values to to be 100 honest about it. Yeah, thank you That was a vegan answer everybody Yeah question This is kind of a question and I know a little bit of a story to Fear you brought up fear and I think fear is used a lot To keep people in their places to make me a greater you You know, and I was born in Mobile, Alabama. I'm old My dad who of course is Would be in his 90s if he was still with us It is 80s at one point in time and he was a typical Mobile, Alabama born in the red person, okay And we moved to Florida which brought in a whole queue than I do but anyway At one point when my dad was in his 80s, let's say he cried he said I don't know what we were so afraid of and I think that's the question that when I try to listen to somebody Is to try to figure out why are you so afraid? Why do you believe? The things you believe and that's hard And some friends that I protest for Every Sunday from noon on the corner of Pack Highway 320 And one day Showed up with his American grade again. Yeah, this was after the election and it was Difficult to just keep asking And he gave some pretty interesting answers that were hard, but anyway That that's Yeah, and if I may just briefly respond on this question around fear So just yesterday I was At a nearby school district. I'm helping them do some work around equity and inclusion By better listening to the stories of their students go figure But it's it's one of those things that Is actually a lot difficult a lot more more difficult to do as a system than than you would think One of the teachers was very excited to see me We've known each other for some time and it's close to me that Currently a large amount of the teachers across the district are planning a day of action on January 31st Where all of them want to wear a teacher that says black lives matter And yeah, and I was like that's that's beautiful and that's amazing And in the back he has this larger statement about solidarity And for them it felt that same black lives matter In fact was a larger statement of solidarity that way extended beyond that They felt like that was the issue to talk about and speak about and and I thought it was beautiful And then as we were doing some classroom observations Afterwards She just told me it's like well, you know how so I told you all of us, but reality is not all of us There's a few of us who have told us that they're going to wear their 10 commandments teacher The right to birth aren't teacher. They're make america great teacher Because they just don't agree with these so it's not a lot of them, but there's a few of them And and and she was angry really really angry about it And and and I sat with that for some time and at the end of the day I approached her again I said I would love to talk to you about You know that anger that you're talking about because I think Sure, it looks like anger to me and I can understand why Because to you it makes no sense how One of your friends and colleagues here Wants to bring this teacher in front of their kids who are mostly brown and black And I understand that anger May I also say that is fear And can we talk about that and can we understand his fear too now? This is a huge ask Right. She's already looking at me like what are you talking about? Like do you want to empathize with this guy over here? Like what about our kids and I'm like I want to empathize with them too You know, uh, what I'm asking here is If you approach this teacher And all you have is your fear as as your argument and your anger as an argument And I guarantee you that if this teacher is already having this type of reaction All they have is their fear and their hate as their argument You're not going to get anywhere and your kids are calling the middle of that Are you telling that you expect your middle school kid to be the facilitator to help this teacher see? No, it's going to be up to you and that's a huge burden to carry but it is going to be you It is going to be you What are we so afraid of each other? Unfortunately Because we don't see each other because we don't know each other again Like a colleague that she had had in this school for 10 years And she did not know him And now suddenly this issue is making people feel like they have to stand on one side or the other I don't think it's that simple And and there's no easy answers and it's challenging and and I get it. I I don't offer easy answers I I really Offer what I think is a a huge challenge. It's just Be uncomfortable in that conversation Um Any other questions any other thoughts? Yes. Yes. Yes, sir. Please Good morning. My name is Walter Heyman III I'm also a part of The most on shout outs or multi scholars program um You're talking about talking with others with privilege And I just want to ask how do you stay humble and open? In a conversation where it's uncomfortable for you And you know that it's uncomfortable for the other person How do you stay self-confident in having that conversation? I don't think I stay self-confident I stay worthy And there's a bit of a difference there Worthy, uh, yes I've reached a point in my life where at this was definitely sort of one of those Transformational moments for me. So when I was a junior The university of washington, I wrote a paper for one of my political science classes title undocumented citizen and And I didn't mean the u.s. I meant the world and That in the in that paper I pretty much laid out my logic for why As an undocumented person of this world I was worthy as a human being That process of writing and reflection and presenting that gave me a sense of self-worth that I believe has been challenged many times But and it has been tested and it has endured so when I engage on on difficult dialogues and conversations My confidence sometimes is shaken because sometimes I am faced with arguments that Uh, in in so many ways I just really don't get them Uh, and that scares me Right what you don't understand and what you don't know it scares you And it is scary to see sometimes how much of that is out there and sometimes I'm I've also engaged with some people who You know our academics and they speak policy or they they're experts on uh on other domains That I don't really fully understand and that shake is my confidence too Um But my wordiness, uh, it's it's there And my wordiness it gives me I think two things. Uh, and one of them you mentioned which is humility To believe you are worthy does not mean That you believe you are better than anybody else, right? It's actually quite the opposite. I think to have a sense of wordiness, right? Gives you at the end of the day A sense of balance and harmony right because for me What it does is that as I'm sitting in front of somebody else I It's not that I see an equal So much as I see another human being And it is this interconnection that at the end of the day I can walk away from any conversation and say you you may deeply believe that That you are better than me or that you That I should be kicked out of this country But at the end of the day like I just I don't think that we can ignore the fact that our futures are tied together If you don't see it Then that's where my empathy kicks in. It's not pity. I'm like and I'm sorry like I just want to Feel I wish you could feel that right and and and at the end of the day is just that connection Right is that harmony that I feel so That's humbling I think you know from From a perspective of leadership The most Inspiring leaders in my opinion Are those that have this humility about them? Because they will not lead As you know The figurehead at the front but in harmony with everyone else feeling everyone else understanding everyone else and You cannot help but to be brought down To your knees and I know that sometimes it's like a sign of defeat but Don't take it that way here. Like you cannot help but to be brought down to your knees in all At what it feels like to be connected to other people. I think dr. King was that type of leader I don't think you can speak and and mobilize people the way he did without that He was in all at people And their willingness to sacrifice and and serve And he lived that message so So I would say yes, uh, that's That's my response to that I try to practice it. I fail many times at it because It's always nice and easy when you're speaking to an audience to put these in words and he's like, oh, wow It's like no, I suck sometimes I'm terrible sometimes like this I I sit down with my sister who's visiting from Mexico right now And I just work. Where is she? Did she leave? Oh, she's over there. That's my sister by the way. She's visiting from Mexico Um, and I sit down with her and we bent We say some ugly things sometimes. I'm not telling you that Don't shy away from those things either. Like right is not leave you every single day as a worthy perfect being No, leave every day as a human being and realize that part of that imperfection is going to be that sometimes you're not going to be willing to listen Understand that And get over it right Right rest up when you can when you have those people that no can hear you that can understand those frustrations Bent off but then get ready for the next encounter where you will have to practice with so much humility, right? and with so much compassion The act of giving to a person that's so willing and ready to take away from you. That's that's tough right, but I cannot help but to feel so strongly that That's the pathway forward At least for me Any any last Anything else anything else? Yes, sir Um, you know Yeah, that that was a challenge one so our uh Who still is our president at the at the moment addressed some of that on his last uh public address I don't know how many of you saw president obama's last public address, but It made me cry. I thought it was I thought it was worthy of the office. Let's just put it that way And and he addressed some of that in in some ways on on on his speech and I'll defer to some of his words One that as much as especially for those of us that are tech savvy as much as we like to put each connection and We're bringing the the world closer together and You know social media we can disseminate news everywhere and information and what a wonderful thing There's obviously in so many ways, I think Also some dangers about this I think in so many ways actually drives this connection instead of connection I don't know at what point we started thinking that poking somebody on facebook was the best way to connect with them Or retweeting them, uh, like there's there's something about that that concerns me From a humanity perspective I I I think uh And again, I'm guilty of this. I I use social media all the time And the thing is like can we just differentiate that social media has been a tool I just would really love for us to use a different word. That's not connection When it comes to like social media Um, just because I I think it's just a very gross misrepresentation of what human connection should be Uh, I I believe, you know what president obama say is like just sit down with that person and talk to him Right, uh, don't don't go back and for argument on post or on facebook. Just sit down with them And have a conversation with them Um, I don't know if you should do that with everyone that's pursuing you on social media Uh, you know, there's definitely some people that have said some things to me social media that I don't think I would go Very safe necessarily sitting in front of them at a coffee shop and talking with them But I think that's not the point. I think the point is The toughest conversations you're going to have are not going to be over social media They're going to be with other people who are going to be writing from you. So Just be mindful of of the silos that you are creating for yourself and It's been difficult to not unfriend some people But I this is this is I do challenge myself this way. I I have not unfriended one single person I've been unfriended, but I have not unfriended a single person just because of one post If we sum up a person's character in just one facebook post or 140 characters or less I think there's I think there's an issue there As as gross and horrible some of these comments may be And I know not everybody agrees with me on this. I get a lot of pushback on this I get a lot of pushback on my message around empathy From both sides if you will and there's more than two sides But just from across the political spectrum I get a lot of people who tell me like nope. It should never be or not to empathize with nobody Because we're the ones who have struggled and we're the ones who have been marginalized and Let's just get people to first acknowledge their privilege and then we can have a conversation of empathy way later on and then I have a lot of other people over there who are like No, where's my gun and like it's just I mean, it's just that extreme I'm just telling you that I get a lot of pushback on these and And I think social media and what we do to ourselves as we self select who surrounds us and who doesn't Just amplifies the problem in some ways. So if you just surround with people that are willing to confirm your every thought to leave an emotion Then I'm sorry because you're gonna live in a very small world