 Chapter number one of Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please go to LibriVox.org. Recording by Arthur Piantedosi. March 6, 2010. Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens. Chapter one. Tricks of a place where Oliver Twist was born and of the circumstances attending his birth. Among other public buildings in a certain town which for many reasons it will be proven to refrain from mentioning and to which I will sign no fictitious name. There's one ancient common to most towns, great or small to it a workhouse. This workhouse is born on a date and date which I need not trouble myself to repeat in as much as it can be of no possible consequence to the reader. In this stage of the business, during all events, the item of mortality whose name is prefixed to the head of this chapter. For a long time after it was issued into this world of sorrow and trouble by the parish surgeon, remained a matter of considerable doubt whether the child was survived or bear any name at all, in which case it is some but more improbable that these memoirs would never have appeared or if they had. That being comprised within a couple of pages they would possess the inestimable merit of being the most concise and faithful specimen of biography extant in the literature of any age or country. Though I'm not disposed to maintain that the being born in the workhouse is in itself the most fortunate in enviable circumstances it can possibly befall a human being. I do mean to say that in this particular instance it was the best thing for Oliver Twist that could possibly have occurred. The fact is that there was considerable difficulty inducing Oliver to take upon himself the office of respiration, a troublesome practice but one which customers rendered necessary to our easier distance, and for some time he laid gasping on a little flock mattress, rather unequally poised between this world and the next. The balance being decidedly in favour of the latter. Now, if during this brief period, awful of heads been surrounded by careful grandmothers, anxious aunts, experienced nurses, and doctors of profound wisdom it was most inevitably and indubitably had been killed in no time. There being nobody by, however, but a poor broil woman who was rendered rather misty by an unwanted allowance of beer, and for a surgeon who did such matters by contract, Oliver and nature fought out the point between them. Result was that after a few struggles Oliver breathed, sneezed, and proceeded to advertise the inhabitants of the workhouse the fact of its new burden having been imposed upon the parish, by setting up as loud a cries but could reasonably have been expected from a male infant who had not been possessed by a very useful appendage of voice for a much longer space of time than three minutes and a quarter. As Oliver gave this first proof of the free and proper action of his lungs, the puncture of coverlet which was hastily flung over the iron bedstead rustled, a pale face of a young woman was raised feebly from the pillow and a faint voice imperfectly articulated the words let me see the child and die. The surgeon had been sitting with his face on towards a fire giving the palms of his hands a warm and rub. Alternatively, as the young woman spoke, he rose and advancing to the bedstead, said with more kindness than might have been expected of him, oh you must not talk about dying yet. Lord Westerl, hear her! No, impotence the nurse has laid the pulsating in her pocket a gleaned-ass bottle, the contents of which she had been tasting in a corner with evident satisfaction. Lord bless her dear heart, when she has lived as long as I have sir, and had thirteen children on her own, and all of them dead at sick two, and then the work hoofs with me. She'll know better than to take on that way. Bless her dear heart, think what it is to be a mother. There's a dear young alarm. Do. Apparently, this consolatory perspective of the mother's prospects failing to produce its due effect, they shook her head and stretched out her hand toward the child. The surgeon deposited it in her arms. She implanted a curl where it leapt passionately on its forehead. Passed her hands over her face, gazed wildly around. Shuddering, her heart fell back and died. They chafed her breast, hands and temples with the blood had stopped forever. Atop of comfort and hope. They'd been trained us too long. It's all over, Miss Thingamme, said the surgeon at last. Ah, poor dear, so it is, said the nurse, picking up the cork-thrin bottle which had fallen out on the pillow, as she stooped to take up the child. Poor dear, you'll needn't mind sending up to me if the child cries, nurse, said the surgeon, putting on his gloves with great deliberation. It's very likely it will be troublesome. Give it a little gruel if it is. He put on his hat and, pausing by the bedside on his way to the door, added, she was a good-looking girl, too. Where did she come from? She was brought here last night, replied the old woman. But at the overseer's order. She was found lying on the street. She walked some distance, for her shoes were worn into pieces. But where she came from? Where she was going to? Nobody knows. The surgeon leaned over the body and raised the land. The old story, he said, shaking his head. No wedging ring, I say. Ah, good night. The medical gentleman walked away to dinner, and the nurse, having once more applied herself to the green bottle, set her dad on the low chair before the fire and proceeded to dress the infant. What an excellent example of the power of dress, or of a twist, was. Wrapped in the blanket, which he had here, too, formed his only covering. He might have been the child of a whirableman, or beggar, who would be hard for the haughtiest stranger to have assigned him his proper place in society. But now that he was enveloped in the old calico rose, yellow in the same service, he was badged and ticketed, and fell into his place at once, a perished child. The orphan of a workhouse, the humble, half-starved drudge to be cuffed and buffeted through the world, despised by all, and pitted by none. All of her cried, lustily, if he could have known that he was an orphan left of the tender mercies of church wardens and overseers. Perhaps he would have cried the louder. End of chapter one of Oliver Twist. Recording by Artha Piantadosi. Oliver Twist. Chapter two. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. Chapter two. Treats of Oliver Twist's growth, education, and bold. For the next eight or ten months, Oliver was the victim of a systematic cause or treachery and deception. He was brought up by hands. Hungry in destitute situation, the infant orphan was duly reported by the workhouse authorities to the parish authorities. The parish authorities inquired with dignity of the workhouse authorities, whether there was no female then domiciled in the house, who was in the situation to impart to Oliver Twist the consolation and nourishment which he sought in need. The workhouse authorities replied with humility that there was not. Upon this, the parish authorities magnanimously and who mainly resolved that Oliver should be farmed. Or, in other words, that he should be dispatched to a branch worker for some three miles off, where twenty or thirty other juvenile offenders against the poor laws ruled about the floor all day without the inconvenience of too much food or too much clothing. One of the parental superintendents of an elderly female repieved the culprits at an author's consideration of seven pence half penny per small head per week. Seven pence half penny is worth per week as a good round diet for a child. A day deal maybe got the seven pence half penny. Quite enough to overload its stomach and make it uncomfortable. The elderly female was a woman of wisdom and experience. She knew it was good for children. And she had a very accurate perspective. She didn't know what it was good for herself. So she appropriated the greater part of the weekly stipend to her own use and consigned the rising parochial generation to even a shorter allowance than was originally provided for them. Thereby finding the lower steps at Depe still and providing herself a great experimental philosopher. Everybody knows the story of another experimental philosopher who had a great theory about a horse being able to live without eating and who demonstrated so well that he had got his own horse down to straw a day and would unquestionably have rendered him a very spirited and rampacious animal on nothing at all. If he had had not died four in twenty hours before he was to have his first comfortable bait of air. Unfortunately for all the experimental philosophy the female to whom was taking care out of her twist was liveradoa. A similar result usually pretended the duration of her system for at the very moment when childhood contrived to exist upon the smallest portion of the weakest possible food. It did pervasively happen in night and half tastes out of ten either it sickened from water cold or fell into the fire from a neglect or it had smothered by accident. In any one of the miserable little being was usually summoned into another world and there gathered the fathers it had never known in this. Occasionally when there was some old and usually interesting inquest upon a perished child who had been overlooked in turning up a bedstead or inadvertently scolded to death when there happened to be a washing though the later accident was very scarce and even approaching into a washing being rare occurrence at the farm the jury would take it into their heads to ask troublesome questions or the parishioners would rebelliously fix their signatures to a remonstrance but these impertinences were speedily checked by the evidence of the surgeon and the testimony of the beetle the former of whom had already opened the body and found nothing inside which was very probable indeed a later of whom invariably swore whatever the perished wanted which was very self-devotional besides the bull made periodically pilgrimages of the farm and always at the beetle the day before they say they were going the children were neat and clean to be held when they went and what more would people have it cannot be expected that this system farming would produce any extraordinary or luxuriant crop or of a twist ninth birth they found him a pale thin child somewhat diminutive in stature and decidedly small in circumference but nature inheritance and implanted a good sturdy spirit in Oliver's breast it had plenty of room to expand thanks to the spare diet of the establishment and perhaps to this circumstance may be attributed to his having any ninth birthday at all be there says it may it was his ninth birthday and he was keeping it in the coal son with a select party of two other young gentlemen who after participating with him in a sound thrashing had been locked up for atrociously presuming to be hungry when Mrs. Mann the good lady of the house was the unspected distal by the apparition of Mr. Bumble the beetle striving to undo the wicked of the garden gate goodness gracious is that you Mr. Bumble sir said Mrs. Mann thrusting her head out of the window and well affected as to say so joy Susan take Oliver and them two brats upstairs and wash them directly my heart alive Mr. Bumble how glad I am to see you surely Mr. Bumble was a fat man and the choleric so instead of spawning to this omen heart his salutation in kindred spirit he gave little wicked and redness shake and then bestowed upon it a kick which could have emanated from no leg but a beetle no only think said Mrs. Mann running out for the three boys had been removed by this time only think of that that I should have forgotten that the gate was bowls on the inside on account of them dear children walk in sir walk in pray Mr. Bumble too sir although this invitation was accompanied with a curtsy that might have sobbed in the heart of a church warden it would by no means verify the beetle do you think this respectable or proper conduct Mrs. Mann inquired Mr. Bumble grasping his cane to keep the perished orphans waiting at your cart and gate when they come here upon parochial business with the parochial orphans are you aware Mr. Mann that you are as I may say a parochial delegate in a stipendary I'm sure Mr. Bumble that I was only telling one or two of the other children as it's so fond of you that it was you who were coming applied Mrs. Mann with great humility Mr. Bumble had a great idea of his oratorical powers and his importance he displayed the one and vindicated the other he relaxed well well Mr. Mann he replied in a calmer tone it may be as you say it may be lead the way in Mr. Mann for I come on business something to say Mrs. Mann entered the beetle into a small parlour with a brick floor placed a seat for him and officially deposited his cock-tat and came on the table before him Mr. Bumble wiped from his forehead this bursary spaition which his walk had engendered glanced complacently at the cock-tat and smiled yes he smiled Beatles are but men Mr. Bumble smiled now but don't be suspended by what I'm going to say observe Mrs. Mann with a bed-devating sweetness you've had a long walk you know what I wouldn't have mentioned it now will you take a little drop of something Mr. Bumble not a drop not a drop said Mr. Bumble waving his right hand in a dignified but placid manner I think you will said Mrs. Mann who had noticed the tone or the refusal of the gesture that had accompanied it just a little drop with a little cold water and a lot of puff sugar Mr. Bumble caught not just a little drop said Mrs. Mann persuasively what is it inquired the beetle why it's what I'm obliged to keep a little love in the house to put in the blessed infant's death here when they ain't well Mr. Bumble when she opened the corner of the cupboard and took her out on a bottle of gas it's gin all not to see if you Mr. B it's gin do you give the children daffy Mrs. Mann inquired Bumble following with his eyes an interesting process of mixing ah bless them that are too dear as it is implied the nurse I couldn't seem to suffer before my very eyes you know sir said Mr. Bumble approvingly no you could not you are her humane woman Mrs. Mann here she sat down the glass I shall take an early opportunity of mentioning it to the bold Mrs. Mann he drew it towards him you feel as a mother Mrs. Mann he stirred the gin and water I drink to your health with cheerfulness Mrs. Mann he swallowed half of it now about business to the beetle taking on a leather and pocket book a child which was bath bath ties all of her twist his eye near old to there bless him and to pose Mrs. Mann inflaming her left eye with the corner of her apron and notwithstanding offered reward of ten bound which was afterward increased to twenty bound notwithstanding the most superlative and I may say supernatural excitation was on the part of the parish said Bumble we have never been able to discover who is his father or what was his mother's settlement name or condition Mrs. Mann raised her hands in astonishment but added after a moment's reflection how comes he to have any name at all then the beetle drew himself up with great pride and said I invented it you're Mr. Bumble I Mr. Mann we name all fanlings in alphabetical order alas was an S swubble I named him this was a T twist I named him the next one comes with the unwinn and the next Vulcans I've got names ready made to the end of the alphabet and all the way through it again when it comes to Z I am quite a literary character sir Mrs. Mann well well to the beetle ever intentionally stratified with the conlement perhaps I may be perhaps I may be Mrs. Mann he finished gin and water and added all of her being now too old to remain here the bolder determined to have him back into the house I have come out myself to take him there so let me see him at once I'll fetch him directly said Mrs. Mann leaving the room for the purpose Oliver having had by this time as much of the outer coat as dirt which encroached his face and hands removed as could be scrubbed off when one washing was led into the room by his benevolent protectorous think about the gentleman Oliver said Mrs. Mann Oliver made a bar which was divided between the beetle on the chair the cork tat on the table will you go along with me Oliver said Mrs. Bumble in a majestic voice Oliver was about to say he would go along with anybody with great readiness when glancing upward he caught sight of Mrs. Mann who had got behind the beetle's chair and was shaking a fist at him with a furious countenance he took the hint at once but he used to do often meant impressed upon his body not to be deeply impressed upon his recollection will she go with me inquired poor Oliver no she can't the word musted Bumble but she'll come and see you sometimes this was no great consolation to the child young as he was however he had since enough to make a faint a feeling great regretted going away it was no very difficult matter for the boy to call tears into his eyes hunger and ill usage were great assistance if you want to cry and Oliver cried very naturally indeed Mrs. Mann gave him a thousand embraces and when Oliver wanted a great deal more a piece of bread and mutter lest you should be seemed too hungry when he got to the workhouse with the last bread in his hand and the little brown bearish cap on his head Oliver was then led away by Mrs. Bumble from the wretched house where one kind word a look had never lighted the gloom of his infant years and as he burst into an anger in the of childish grief as the cottage gate closed after him wretched as were the little companion's misery was leaving behind they were the only friends he'd ever known and a sense of his loneliness in the great wide world sank into the child's heart for the first time Mr. Bumble walked on in his long strides little Oliver finally grasping his gold lace cuff trotted behind him inquiring at the end of the every quarter of a mile whether they were nearly there using allegations Mr. Bumble to turn to very brief and snappish replies with a temporary blandness with gin and water awakens and some bosoms had by this time evaporated and it was once again a beetle Oliver had not been within the walls of the workhouse a quarter of an hour and had seriously completed the demolition of his second slice of bread when Mr. Bumble would hand him over to the care of an old woman returned and telling him it was a bored night informed with the bored forthwith having a clearly defined notion of what a live bold was only for those rather astonished by their intelligence it was not quite certain whether he ought to laugh or cry he had no time to think about the matter however for Mr. Bumble gave him a tap on the head with his cane to wake him up another of them back to make him lively and bidding him to follow conducted him into a large whitewashed room where ten gentlemen were sitting around the table at the top of the table seated in an armchair rather higher than the rest there was a particularly fat gentleman with a very round red face bow to the board said Bumble Oliver brushed away two or three tears that were lingering in his eyes and seeing no bored but the table fortunately bowed to that what's your name boy said the gentleman in the high chair Oliver was frightened at the sight of the gentleman which made him tremble and the beetle gave him another tap on the eye which made him cry these two causes made him answer in a very low and hesitating voice whereupon a gentleman in the white waistcoat said he was a fool which was a capital way of raising his spirit and putting him quite in disease boy said the gentleman in the high chair listen to me you know you're an orphan I suppose what's that sir inquired poor Oliver the boy is a fool I thought he was the third gentleman in the white waistcoat hush the gentleman had spoken first you know you've got no other mother than else you were brought up by the parish don't you yes sir replied Oliver weeping bitterly what are you crying for inquired the gentleman in the white waistcoat and to be sure it was very extraordinary what could the boy be crying for I hope you'll see your prayers every night sit another gentleman in the rough voice and pray for the people who feed you and take care of you like a Christian yes sir the gentleman who had spoke last was unconsciously right it would have been a very like Christian and a marvelously good Christian too if Oliver had prayed for the people who fed and took care of him but he hadn't because nobody had taught him well you've come here to be educated and taught a useful trade at the red-faced gentleman in the high chair so you'll begin to pick okam tomorrow morning at six o'clock and at the sirly one in the white waistcoat and the combination of both those blessings and the one simple process of peaking okam Oliver bowed low in the direction of the beetle and he was then hurried away into a large ward where on the rough part bet he sought himself to sleep with a noble aeration of the tender laws of England they let the pauper go to sleep poor Oliver his little thought as he lay sleeping and happy on consciousness of all around him at that very day arrived at a decision which would exercise the most material influence over all his bitter fortunes but they had and this was it the members of this board were very a sage deep philosophical men and when they came to turn their attention to the workhouse they found out at once what ordinary folks would never have discovered the poor people liked it it was a regular place of public entertainment for the poorer classes what happened where there was nothing to pay a public breakfast dinner tea and supper all the year round a brick and mortar Elysium what it was all play no work ohhh said the board looking very knowing we are those to set this right we'll stop it all in no time so they established the rule that all poor people should have the alternative they would compel nobody not they of being starved by a gradual process in the house or by a quick one out of it with this view they contrasted the wall to work to lay on an unlimited supply of water and with a corn factor to supply periodically small quantities of oatmeal they issued three mules of thin gruel a day with an onion twice a week and half a roll of sunnys they made a great otherwise in humane regulations having reference to the ladies which is not necessary to repeat kindly undertook to divorce poor married people in consequence of the great expense of a suit in doctors commons and instead of compelling a man to support his family as they had here until after all done took his family away from him and made him a bachelor there is no saying how many applicants under those last two heads might have started up in all classes of a society if it had not been compatible with the work house but the board were long headed men and provided for this difficulty the release was inseparable from the work house and the gruel and that frightened people for the first six months after all of a twist was removed the system was in full operation it was rather expensive at first in consequence of an increase in the undertaker's bill in the necessity of taking in the clothes of all the paupers which fluttered loosely on their wasted shrunken forms after a week or two of gruel but the number of work house inmates got thin as well as the paupers and the board was in ecstasies the room in which the boys were fed but there was a large stone hall with a copper at one end out of which the master dressed in an apron and assisted by one or two women laden with gruel at meal times all these tested of composition each boy had one porridge and no more except on occasions of great public rejoicing when he had two ounces and a quarter of bread besides the bowls never wanted washing the boys polished them with their spoons and they shone again when they performed this operation which never took very long their spoons being nearly as large as the bowls they would sit staring with the copper with such eager eyes as if they could have devoured the very bricks of which it was composed employing themselves meanwhile and sucking fingers most insidiously with the view of catching up any splashes of gruel that might have been cast there upon boys of generally excellent appetites all of a twist and his companions suffered the tortures of slow starvation for three months alas the good so voracious and wild but hunger that one boy was tall for his age and hadn't been used to that sort of thing for as small they had kept a small cook shop he did darkly to his companions unless he had another basin of gruel per diem he was afraid that he might some night happen to eat the boy who slept next to him happened to be a weekly with a tender age in a wild hungry eye and they implicitly believed him a council was held lots were cast who should walk up to the master after supper that evening and ask for more and it fell to all of a twist the evening arrived the boys took up their places their master in his cooks uniform stationed himself at the copper his pauper assistants ranged themselves behind them which rule was served out and a long race was set over the short commons appeared the boys whispered to each other and winked at all of her well those next neighbours nudged him child as he was he was desperate with hunger and reckless with misery he rose towards the table and advanced to the master basin and spoon in hand and said somewhat alarming at his own tenacity please sir I want some more mass was a fat healthy man but he turned very pale he defied astonishment on the small rebel for some seconds and then clung for the port of the copper the assistants were paralysed with wonder the boys with fear was the master at length and obeyed the boys please sir bide Oliver I want some more the master aimed the blow at Oliver's head with the ladle pinioned him in his arm and shrieked aloud with a beetle and saw him concave and Mr Bumble rushed into the room and greeted Sightman and aggressed the gentleman in the high chair and said Mr Lemkins I beg your pardon sir all of her twist is asked for more there was a general start horror was depicted on every countenance for more said Mr Lemkins impose yourself Bumble and answer me distinctly do I understand he is asked for more after he is eaten on the supper allotted by the dietary he did sir replied Bumble the boy would be hung so the gentleman in the weight waist coat I know the boys will be hung nobody contributed the prophetic gentleman's opinion an animated discussion took place Oliver was ordered into instant confinement and a bill was next morning pasted on Sight of the gate offering a reward of five pounds to anyone who would take all of her twist off the hands of the perish in other words five pounds and all of her twist were offered to any man or woman who wanted to enter into any trade, business or calling I never was more convinced of anything in my life said the gentleman in the white waist coat as he knocked at the gate and read the bill the next morning I was convinced of anything in my life than I am that the bad boy will come to be hung as I purposed to show in the sequel whether the white waist coated gentleman was right or not I should perhaps mar the interest of this narrative supposing it to possess in it at all if I venture to gain just yet whether the life of Oliver Twist had this violent termination oh no end of chapter two chapter three of Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain recording by Arthur Piantodosi chapter title relates how Oliver Twist was very near getting a place not of Inesinicure for a week after the commission of the impious and profane offence of asking for more Oliver remained the first prisoner in his dark and solitary room to which he had been consigned by the wisdom and mercy of the bold it appears at first sight not unreasonable to suppose that he had entertained a becoming yielding respect for the prediction of the gentleman in the white waistcoat he would have established that saged his prophetic character once and forever by tying one end of his pocket entered ship to a fork on the wall and attaching himself to the other to the performance of this feat however there was one obstacle namely that pocket anchorchiefs being decided ump-durgles of luxury had been for all future times and ages removed from the noses of paupers by the express order of the board in council assembled solemnly given and pronounced under their hands and seals there was a still greater obstacle in all of his youth and childishness he only cried bitterly all day and when the long dismal night came on brought his little hands before his eyes to shut out the darkness encroaching in the corner tried to sleep every now and then waking with a start and a tremble and drawing himself closer and closer to the wall as if to feel even its cold hard surface were like a protection in the gloom in his which surrounded him let it not be supposed by the enemies of the system that during the period of his solitary incarceration Oliver was denied the benefit of exercise the pleasure of society or the advantages of a rigid consolation as for exercise it was nice cold weather and he was allowed to perform his ablutions every morning under the pump in a stone yard in the presence of Mr Bumble who prevented his catching cold and causing a tingling sensation to pervade his frame by repeated applications of a cane as for society he was carried every other day into the hall where the boys died and there sociably flowed as a public warming and example and so for or being denied the advantages of rigid consolation he was kicked into the apartment every evening at prayer time and there permitted to listen to the general supplication of the boys containing a special clause thereby inserted by the authority of the board in which they entered to make good, virtuous, contented and obedient and to be guarded from the sins and vices of Oliver Twist whom the supplication distinctly set forth under the exclusive protection of the powers of wickedness and in articles directly of the manufacture of the devil himself it chanced one morning when Oliver's affairs were in this auspicious and comfortable state that Mr Gamfield, chimney sweep went his way down the high street deeply connotating in his mind his ways and means of paying certain arrears of rent for which his landlord had become rather pressing Mr Gamfield's most sanguine destination of his finances could not raise him within £5 of the desired amount and in the species of arithmetical desperation he was alternative cuddling his brains and his donkey when passing the workhouse his eyes under the bill on the gate whoa sent Mr Gamfield to the donkey the donkey was in his state of profound abstraction wondering powerfully whether he was destined to be regaled with a cleavage stalker too when he disposed of the two sacks which the little cart was latent so without noticing the word of command he jogged onward Mr Gamfield growled a fierce implication on the donkey generally but more particularly on his eyes and running after him bestowed a blow on his head which would inevitably have beaten in in his skull but a donkey's then catching hold of the bridle he gave his jaw a sharp wrench by way of a gentle reminder he was not his own master by these means turned him round he then gave him another blow on the head just to stun him until he came back again having completed these arrangements he walked up to the gate to read the bill the gentleman with the white waist coat was standing at the gate with his hands behind him after having delivered himself of some profound sentiments in the ballroom having witnessed the little dispute between Mr Gamfield and a donkey he smiled joyously when that person came up to read the bill for he saw it once that Mr Gamfield was exactly the sort of bastard of a twist wanted Mr Gamfield smiled too when he was the document for five pounds which was the sum he'd been wishing for and as to the boy which it was incumbent Mr Gamfield knowing what the dietary the workhouse was well knew he would be a nice small pattern just a tiny thing for register stoves so he smelt the bill through again from beginning to end and then touching his fur cap and token of humility it costed the gentleman the white waist coat this here boy what the parish wants to print this that Mr Gamfield ah my man said the gentleman in the white waist coat with a ton and sending a smile what's up him the parish would like him to learn a right pleasant trade in baseness and Mr Gamfield I won't surprise and I'm ready to take him walk in so the gentleman in the white waist coat Mr Gamfield would have been lingered behind to give us the donkey another blow on the head another range of the jaw as a caution not to run away in his absence followed the gentleman with the white waist coat into the room where Oliver had first seen him it's a nasty trade said Mr Limkins Mr Gamfield had again stated his wish look boys have been smothered in chimneys before now said another gentleman the articles adept the straw for they're lit in the chimney to make them come down again said Gamfield that's all smoke in no blaze whereas smoke ain't no nose at all in making a boy come down for it only seems to be to sleep and that's what he likes boys is very obstinate gentlemen and they are not in like a good hot blaze to make them come down with the wrong yet you may need to gentlemen of course even if they're stuck in the chimney both their feet make them a struggle to destruct themselves the gentleman in the white waist coat appeared very much amused by this explanation but his mouth was speedily checked by a look from Mr Limkins the ball then proceeded to converse among themselves for a few minutes so alone atone for that the words of saving of expenditure looked well in the accounts I've a printed report published but alone all bitable there is only chance to be heard indeed or account of their being very frequently repeated with great emphasis I length the wind splitting ceased and the members of the ball having resumed their seats and where solemnity Mr Limkin said we have considered your proposition we don't approve of it not at all said the gentleman in the white waist coat decidedly not added the other members as Mr Gamfield did happen to labour under the slight imputation of having bruised three or four boys to death already it occurred him that the ball had perhaps in some unaccountable freak taken into their head this extraneous circumstance ought to have influenced their proceedings was very unlike their general mode of doing business if they had but still as he has no particular wish to revive the rumour he twisted his captain's hands and walked slowly from the table so you ought to have him gentlemen said Mr Manfield pausing near the door no goodbye Mr Limkin at least as it's a nasty business we think you ought to take some thing less than the premium we offered Mr Gamfield's countenance frightened as with quick step he reached into the table and said what do you give gentlemen come don't be too hard on a poor man what do you give I should say three pound ten was plenty and Mr Limkin's ten shillings too much there's a gentleman in the white waist coat come said Gamfield they four pound gentlemen they four pound and you got rid of him for good and all there three pound ten repeated Mr Limkin's firmly come let's straighten it to devilence gentlemen three pound fifteen not a far thing more was the firm reply Mr Limkin's you're desperate hard upon me gentlemen at Gamfield wavering poo poo nonsense the gentleman in the white waist coat he'd be cheap with nothing at all it's a premium, check him you silly fellow he's just a boy for you he wants a stick now and then it'll do him good come very expensive he hasn't been over fenced since he was born ah ah ah so Gamfield gave an arch look at the faces round the table and observing a smile on all of them gradually broken to a smile the bargain was made Mr Bumble was at once destructive that Oliver Twist and its indentures were to be evaded before the magistrate for signature and approval had very afternoon in pursuance of this determination little Oliver to his excessive astonishment was released from bondage in order to put himself into a clean shirt it hardly achieved this very unusual gymnastic performance when Mr Bumble brought him with his own hands to the basin of gruel and horrid air allowance of two ounces and a quarter of bread at this tremendous sight on the forbidden cry very pitiously thinking not on naturally the board must have determined to kill him for some useful purpose or they would never have begun to fatten him up in that way don't make your eyes red Oliver but eat your food and be thankful and Mr Bumble with his own impressive pomposity what a print is of Oliver a print is sir is it a child trembling yes Oliver and Mr Bumble a kind and blessed gentleman which is so many parents to you Oliver when you are none of your own going to print you and to set you up in life and make a man of you although the expense of the parish is three pound ten three pound ten Oliver and four days expense an awful and naughty orphan which nobody can't love as Mr Bumble paused to take breath after delivering this address in an awful voice the tears rolled down the poor child's face and he saw bitterly come and Mr Bumble somewhat less pompously thought it was gratifying with his own feelings to observe the effect his eloquence of blues come Oliver wipe your eyes with a cuffs of your jacket and I until grew at a very foolish action Oliver that certainly was for there was quite enough water in it already all the way to the magistrate Mr Bumble instructed Oliver that all he would have to do would be to look very happy and say when the gentleman asked him if he wanted to be a apprentice that he would like it very much indeed but was a whizzing junctions Oliver promised to obey the rather as Mr Bumble threw in a gentleman that if he failed in either particular there was no telling what would be done to him when they arrived at the office he was shut up in a little room by himself and admonished by Mr Bumble to stay there until they came back to fetch him the boy remained with the pulpitating heart for half an hour at the inspiration of which time Mr Bumble thrust in his head unadorned the cocking-an inside a loud now Oliver my dear come to the gentleman as Mr Bumble said this threatening looking at in a low voice mind what I told you you rung rascal Oliver stared innocently in Mr Bumble's face in this somewhat contradictory style of address that gentleman prevented these offering any remark of her upon by leading him at once into a joining room the door of which was open it was a large room with a great window behind the desk sat two old gentlemen powered at heads one of whom was reading the newspaper the other was bruising with the aid of a pair of tortoise shell spectacles a small piece of parchment with laying before him Mr Limpkins was standing in front of the desk at one on side in Mr Gammfield with a partially washed face on the other well two or three of the men in top boots were lounging about the old gentleman with the spectacles gradually dozed off over a little bit of parchment and there was a short pause after one of them had been stationed by Mr Bumble in front of the desk this is the boy or worship said Mr Bumble the old gentleman who was reading the newspaper raised his head for a moment and pulled the other old gentleman by the sleeve where upon that ask mentioned the old gentleman woke up oh is it the boy had the old gentleman this is him sir by Mr Bumble bow to the magistrate my dear Mr Bumble roused himself and made his best obeisance he'd been wondering with his eyes fixed on the magistrate's powder whether all bores were born with that white stuff on their heads and were bores from there and forth on that account well said the old gentleman I suppose he's formed of chimney sweeping a totes on it your worship replied Bumble giving Oliver a sly pinch to intimate the dependent and not saying he didn't and he will be a sweet willie if he were to bind him to any other trade tomorrow he'd run away simultaneously of your worship replied Bumble this man that's to be his master you sir you'll feed him well and feed him and do all that sort of thing with you said the old gentleman when he says I will I means I will replied Mr Ganfield doggily you'll run off I think I'm my friend but you'll look an honest open-hearted man said the old gentleman turning his spectacles in an erection of a candidate for Oliver's premium whose villainous countenance was a recklessly stamped rep seat for cruelty the magistrate was half blind and half childish so he couldn't reasonably be expected this is certain what other people did I hope I am sorry said Mr Ganfield with an ugly leer I have no doubt you are my friend replied the old gentleman fixing his spectacles more firmly on his nose and looking about him for the ink stand it was the critical moment of Oliver's fate if the ink stand had been where the old gentleman thought it was he would have dipped his pen into it and signed the indentures and Oliver would have been straight away hurried off but as a chance to be immediately under his nose he'd follow and as a matter of course he looked all over his desk for it without finding it and happened in the course of a search to look straight up before him the old gentleman's gaze encountering the pale and telephined face of Oliver and twist who despite all the unmanority looks and pinches a bumble was regarded the impulsive countenance of his future master demingled the expression of horror and fear too palpable to be mistaken even by half blind magistrate the old gentleman stopped laid down his pen and looked from Oliver to Mr Limkin who attempted to take snuff with a cheerful unconcerned aspect my boy so the old gentleman looked pale and alarmed what is the matter stand a little away from him in beetle so the other magistrate laying aside the paper and leaning forward with the expression of interest now boy tell us what the matter don't be afraid Oliver twirled to his knees and clasping his hands together prayed that they would order him back to dark room that they would starve him beat him kill him if they pleased rather than send him away with that dreadful man well Mr Bumble raising his hands and eyes with the most impressive solemnity well of all the old friend designing all of the sea Oliver you are one of the most bare faced held your tongue beetle so the second old gentleman when Mr Bumble would invent of this compound a directive I beg your worship spartan then Mr Bumble incredulous a favouring word right did your old worship speak to me yes held your tongue Mr Bumble was supervised with astonishment a beetle ordered to hold his tongue a moral revolution the old gentleman in the tortoise shell spectacles looked at his companion he nodded significantly we'd refused to sanction his indentures so the old gentleman tossing aside the piece of parchment he spoke I hope then Mr Winkbums I hope the magistrates will not form the opinion that the authorities have been guilty of any plot of a conduct on the unsupported testimony of a child magistrates are not called upon to pronounce any opinion on the matter so the second old gentleman sharply take the boy back to the workhouse and treat him kindly he seems to want it that same evening the gentleman in the white waistcoat were publicly and delicately affirmed not only that Oliver would be a hull but that he would be drawn and caught as into the bargain Mr Bumble shook his head with gloomy mystery and said he wished he might come to good but upon Mr Ganfield would apply that he wished he might come to him which although he agreed with the beetle in most matters would seem to be a wish of a totally opposite description the next morning the public were months more informed that Oliver Twist was again to let then five pounds would be paid to anybody who would take possession of him end of chapter three chapter number four of Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens this is a LibriVox recording this LibriVox recording is in the public domain chapter four Oliver being offered in another place makes his first entry into public life great families when an advantageous place cannot be obtained either possession, reversion, remainder or expectancy for the young man who was growing up it is a very general custom to send him to sea the bold and imitation of so wise and salutary an example to counsel together on the expediency of shipping off Oliver Twist in some small trading vessel bound to a good unhealthy port this suggested itself as the very best thing would possibly be done with him the probability being that the skipper would flog him to death and playful some day after dinner would knock out his brains out with an iron bar both past times being as is pretty well known very favourite and common recreations among gentlemen of that class the more the case presented itself to the bold in this point of view the more manifold the advantages of a step appeared so they came to the conclusion that the only way of providing for Oliver effectually was to send him to sea without delay Mr Bumble had been dispatched to make various preliminary inquiries but the view of finding out some captain or other wanted a cabin boy without any friends and was returning to the workhouse to communicate the result of his mission when he encountered the gate no less person than Mr Sowerberry parochial undertaker Mr Sowerberry was a tall got large jointed man attired in a suit of threadbare black with dark cotton stockings of the same colour and she was to answer his features were not naturally intended to wear a smiling aspect but he was in general rather given to professional jocosity and his face be tokened inward pleasantly as he advanced to Mr Bumble and shook him cordially either hand I am taking the measure of two women that died last night Mr Bumble said the undertaker you'll make your fortune Mr Sowerberry said the beetle as he thrust his thumb and forefinger into the preferred snuff box of the undertaker which was an ingenious little model I say you'll make your fortune Mr Sowerberry repeated Mr Bumble tapping the undertaker on the shoulder in a friendly manner with his cane think so said the undertaker in a turn which have admitted enough disputed the probability of the event prices land by the poor the very small Mr Bumble so all the coffins replied the beetle precisely as near an approach to a laugh as a great official to indulge in Mr Sowerberry was much tickled at this as of course he ought to be laughed a long time with that sensation very well Mr Bumble he said at length there's no denying that since the new system of feeding has come in the coffins are somewhat more and more shallow than they used to be we must have some profit Mr Bumble we'll season timber at an expensive article sir in all the iron handels come by canal from Birmingham well well said Mr Bumble every trade has its drawback sub their profit is of course allowable of course applied the undertaker and if I don't get a profit upon this or that particular article I make it up in the long run you see you're so said Mr Bumble I must say and to the undertaker returning the current observations with the beetle and interrupted I must say Mr Bumble that I have had to contend against one very great disadvantage which is that all the sad people go off the quickest the people who have been better off and obeyed rate through many years are the first to sink when they come into the house and I tell you Mr Bumble the three or four inches over one's calculation makes a great hole in one's profits especially when he has a family of a bike for sir as Mr Saubary said this with the becoming indignation of an ill used man and as Mr Bumble it was rather tended to convey a reflection on the honour of a parish that it a gentleman thought it advisable to change the subject all of a twist being up at most in his mind he made him his theme by the bar air said Mr Bumble you don't know anybody who wants a boy do you a parochial apprentice who is it present a dead weight a millstone as I might say round the parochial throat liberal terms Mr Saubary liberal terms as Mr Saubary spoke he raised his cane to the bill above him and gave three distinct wraps upon the words five pounds which entered thereon in roman capitals of gigantic sign that the undertaker taking Mr Bumble by the guilt edge lapel of his official coat that's just the thing I wanted to speak to you about you know dear me what a very elegant button that is Mr Bumble I never noticed it before yes I think it is rather pretty that the beetle lancing proudly downwards at the large brass buttons between balladists coat that I as the same as a parochial see you the gold somerid and kneeling a sick and bruised man the poor presented it to me on New Year's morning Mr Saubary I put it on I remember for the first time to attend the inquest on that reduced tradesman who died in a doorway at midnight I recollect said the undertaker the jury brought in died from exposure to the cold and mourn to the necessities of luxuries of life didn't bear Mr Bumble nodded and they made it to special verdict I think said undertaker adding some words to the effect if the relieving officer had opposed the beetle if the board attended to all the nonsense that ignorant jurymen talk they'd have enough to do very true said the undertaker they would indeed jurors and Mr Bumble grasping as Cain tightly as was his want when working no passion his uneducated vulgar gravelling wretches so they are said the undertaker they haven't no more philosophy you know political comm you're more than that the beetle snapping his fingers contemptuously no more they have creased the undertaker I despise them at the needle growing very red in the face so do I undertaker and I only wish we'd had underburied the independent salt in our house for a week or two and the beetle the rules and regulations of the board would soon letting a spirit down for him let him alone for that replied the undertaker so saying he smiled approvingly to call him the rising rat of the indignant parish officer Mr Bumble lifted off his cockat of tat took Angerci from the inside of the crown wiped from his forehead the perspiration was just rage and engendered fixed the cockat on again and turned into the undertaker set in a calmer voice well what about the boy oh replied the undertaker why you know Mr Bumble I pay a good deal towards the paws rates hmm and Mr Bumble well well replied the undertaker I was thinking did I pay so much to talk to I have a right to get as much out of him as I can Mr Bumble and so I think I'll take the boy myself Mr Bumble grasped the undertaker by the arm and led him into the building Mr Saab but he was closer to the board for five minutes and he was arranged to see him that evening upon liking afraid to its mains in the case of a parish apprentice except the master finds upon a short trial that he couldn't get enough work out of a boy without putting too much food into him he should life him for a term of years to do what he lacks with when little Oliver was taken before the gentleman that evening and informed that he was to go that night as general house-lad of coffin-makers the situation or whatever came back to the parish again he might be sent to see all knocked on the head as the case may be he then so little emotion that they by common intent pronounced him a hard and young rascal and all that Mr Bumble to remove him forthwith now although it was very natural that the board of all people in the world should feel in a very great state of virtuous astonishment and horror that smallest tokens of want of feeling on the part of anybody they were rather out in this particular instance the simple fact was that Oliver instead of possessing too little feeling possessed rather too much and was in a fair way of being reduced for life to a state of brutal piddity and silentness by the ill-newsage he had received he heard the news of his destination in perfect silence and having had his luggage put into his hand which was not very difficult to carry in as much as it was all comprised within the limits of a brown paper parcel but half a foot square by three inches deep he pulled his cap over his eyes and once more attached himself to Mr Bumble's coat cuff was led away by that dignitary to a new scene of suffering for some time Mr Bumble drew Oliver along without notice or a mark for the beadle carried his head very erect as the beadle always short and it being a windy day little Oliver was completely enshraded by Mr Bumble's coat as they blew open and it's close to great advantages flapped waistcoat and drab plush knee breeches as they drew near to their destination however Mr Bumble thought it expedient to look down and see that the boy was in good order for inspection by his new master which he accordingly did with a fit in becoming heir of gracious bytonage Oliver said Mr Bumble yes sir applied Oliver in a low tremulous voice pull that cap over your eyes and hold up your head sir although Oliver did as he was desired at once and passed the back of his unoccupied hand briskly across his eyes he left a tear in them when he looked up at his conductor as Mr Bumble gave sternly upon him it ruled down his cheek it was followed by another and another the child made a strong effort and a successful one withdrawing his other hand from Mr Bumble he hovered his face with both and wept until the tears sprung out from between his chin and bony fingers well enslave Mr Bumble stopping short and darting as little child over the look of intense malignancy well of all the ungrateful and most disposed boys as ever I see Oliver you are the no no no sir laying into the hand which held the no no no no sir I will be good indeed indeed indeed I will sir I am a very little boy sir and it is so so SO WHAT inquired Mr Bumble on amazement so lonely sir so very lonely right this child everybody hates me oh sir don't don't creep across at me the child beat his hand on his heart and looked in his companions face with tears of real agony Mr Bumble regarded Oliver's pitious and helpless look with some astonishment for a few seconds him three of all times in a husky manner and after muttering something about a troublesome cough bared Oliver dry his eyes and be a good boy then once more taking his hand he walked on with him in silence the undertaker who just put up the shutters of his shop was making some entries in stable by the most most appropriate dismal candle when Mr Bumble entered aha said the undertaker looking up from the book and pausing in the middle of a word is that you a bumble no one else Mr Saab are it replied the people yeah I bought the boy Oliver made a bow oh that's the boy is it the undertaker raising the candle above his head to get a better view of Oliver Mrs Saab are it will you have the goodness to come here a moment my dear Mrs Saab are it emerge from a little room behind the shop and present the form at a short and squeezed up woman with a fixinish counter that's my dear Mr Saab are it differentially this is the boy from the work house that I told you of on the verb out again dear me the undertaker's right he's very small well he is rather small replied Mr Bumble looking at Oliver as if it were his fault that he was no bigger he is so small there's no denying it it's you grow Mrs Saab are it you grow aha I dare say he will a quiet lady on all fictures and our drink I see no saving and perished children not a hive they always cost more to keep than they're worth however men always think they know best there get down stairs a little bag of bones with this undertaker's wife opened a side door and pushed Oliver down a steep flight of stairs into a stone cell dampen arc forming the anti-room to a coal cell and nominated kitchen such a slatterly girl and shows down the hill and blew all its stockings very much out of repair yeah charlotte said Mr Saab are it would pull it over down give this boy some of the cool bits that the boy for tip he hasn't come home since morning so he won't go out without I dare say the boy isn't too dainty to eat them are you boy Oliver whose eyes had listened to the mention of meat and he was trembling with eagerness to devour it replied in a negative and a plate full of coarse broken victuals who slept before him I wish some well fed philosopher whose meat and drink turned to gall with him whose blood is ice and whose heart is iron could have seen Oliver twist clutching the dainty vians of the dog and neglected I wish he could have witnessed the horrible speech told of a tall the beaks a sun with all the ferocity of famine there is only one thing I should like better and that would be to see the philosopher making the same sort of meal himself the same relish well said that on the taker's wife whom Oliver had finished his supper which he had regarded in silent horror and with fearful auguries of his future appetite have you done there being nothing eatable within his reach Oliver replied in the affirmative then come with me and Mrs. Arbery taking up a dim and dirty lap leaning away upstairs your bed's under the counter you don't mind sleeping among the coffins I suppose but it doesn't matter why you do or don't but you can't sleep anywhere else come don't keep your power on light Oliver lingered no longer but meekly followed his new mistress end of chapter 4 of Oliver Twist chapter number 5 of Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens this Vox recording is in the public domain recording by Arthur Piantodosi chapter 5 Oliver mingles with new associates going to a funeral for the FaceTime he forms an unfavorable notion of his master's business Oliver being left to himself in the undertaker's shop the lamp down on a works and bench and gazed timidly about him with the feeling of awe and dread which many people would deal over than he will be at no loss to understand an unfinished coffin on black trestles which stood in the middle of the shop looked so gloomy and deathlike that a cold tremble came over him every time his eyes wandered in the direction of the dismal object from which he almost expected to see some frightful forms slowly rear his head driving mad with terror against the wall were ranged in regular ray a long row of ill boards cut in the same shape looking in the dim light like high shoulders ghost with their hands in the breeches pockets coffin plates, elm chips bright-headed nails and strength of black claw the wall behind the counter was ornamented with a lively representation of two mutes stiff neck claws unduty at a large private door with a hearse drawn by four exceeds approaching in the distance the shop was close and hot the atmosphere seemed tainted with the smell of coffins the recess behind the counter in which his clock mattress was thrust looked like a grave nor were these the only dismal feelings with depressed Oliver he was alone in a strange place we all know how chilled and desolate we sometimes feel in such a situation the boy had no friends to care for all to care for him the great of no recent separation was fresh in his mind the absence of no loved and well-remembered face sank heavily into his heart but his heart was heavy notwithstanding and he wished as he crept into his narrow bed that that were his coffin and that he could be laid in a calm and laugh-sting sleep in the church-armed ground with the old grass waving gently by his head and the sound of the old deep bell was soothing him in sleep Oliver was awakened in the morning by a loud kicking at the outside of the shop door which before he could handle and on his clothes was repeated in an anger-in-epidest manner about twenty-five times when he began to undo the chain the legs desisted and the voice began open the door will ye cried in voice it belonged to the legs which had kicked at the door and went in directly sir replied Oliver undoing the chain and turning the key I suppose you're the new boy are ye then the voice threw the kegel yes sir replied Oliver how old are ye and where are the voice then sir replied Oliver then I'll warp you when I get in said the voice you just see if I don't that's all my work is brought and having made this obliging promise the voice began to whistle Oliver too been too often subjected to the process to which the very expressive monosyllable just recorded Bear's reference to entertain the smallest that the owner of the voice whoever he might be would redeem his pledge most honourably he drew back the boats of the trembling hand and opened the door for a second or two all of a glance up the street and down the street and over the way impressed with the belief that the unknown who had addressed him through the keyhole but walked a few paces off to warm himself and nowhere did he see but a degenerity boy sitting on the posts in front of the house eating a slice of bread and butter which he cut into wedges the size of his mouth with a clout's knife and then consumed great exteriority I beg your pardon sir said Oliver lengthening that no other visitor in his appearance did you knock I kick it replied the charity boy just a coffin sir replied Oliver innocently that this charity boy looks monstrous fierce and said that Oliver would want one before long if he cut jokes with his superiors on this way you don't know why I'm a support workers that the charity boy in continuation descending from the top of the post meanwhile with edifying gravity no sir join Oliver I'm his Noah playboy and you're under me dig on the shutters you idle young ruffian this young Mr. Claypole addressed a kicked Oliver and entered the shop with the dignified air which is him great credit it is difficult for a large headed small-eyed youth of lumbering make and heavy countenance look dignified under any circumstances but it is more especially so when super added to these personal attractions are a red nose and yellow smalls Oliver having taken down the shutters and broke in a pane of glass in his effort to stag it away but the weight of the first one to a small court at the side of the house in which they were kept during the day was graciously assisted by Noah who having consoled him with the assurance that it got it consented to help him Mr. Sauber came down soon after shortly afterwards Mr. Sauber he pleared Oliver having caught it in fulfillment of Noah's prediction following that young gentleman down the stairs to breakfast come here Neil then I had Noah I saved a bit of bacon for you from Mr. Breakfast Oliver shut the door to Noah's back and take them bits that I put on the corner of the bread pan there's your tea cake it away in that box and drink it there and make haste do you hear do you hear workers clapo no Noah what a rotten creature you are why don't you enter the boy alone let him alone why everybody lets him alone enough for the matter of that neither his father nor his mother will ever interfere with him or his relatives have let him in his own way pretty well oh you queer soul the child bursting into a hurrying laugh in which she was joined by Noah after which they both looked scornfully at poor Oliver Twist as he sat shivering on the box in the coldest corner of the room and ate the stale pieces which had been specially preserved there for him Noah was a charity boy but not a workhouse orphan no chance child was he for he could use his genealogy all the way back to his parents who lived hard by his mother being a washerwoman soldier discharged with a wooden leg and a year and old pension of two pence half-penny in an un-statable fraction the shop boys in the neighbourhood had long been in the habit of branding Noah in the public streets with the ignominious epithets of Letters Charity and their like and Noah had born them without reply but now that fortune had cast in his way and named his orphan and whom even the meanest could point the finger of scorn he retorted on him with interest this affords charming food for contemplation it shows it was a beautiful thing human nature may be made to be and how impartially the same amiable qualities have developed in the finest law of the dirtiest charity boy Noah had been sojourning at the undertaker some three weeks or a month Mr. and Mrs. Saabari this syrup being shut up for taking a supper in the little back parlor when Mrs. Saabari after several deferential grandsons and his wife said my dear was going to say more Mrs. Saabari looking up with a peculiar petuitous aspect to shop to her well then Mrs. Saabari sharply nothing my dear nothing then Mr. Saabari uh-uh then Mr. Saabari not at all my dear then Mrs. Saabari humbly I thought you didn't want to hear my dear I was only going to say oh don't tell me what you were going to say and propose Mrs. Saabari I am nobody don't consult me pray I don't want to intrude on your secrets Mrs. Saabari said this she gave a hysterical laugh which threatened violent content urges my dear said Mrs. Saabari I wanted to ask your advice no no no don't ask mine ride Mrs. Saabari in an affecting manner as somebody else's here there was another hysterical laugh which frightened Mrs. Saabari very much this is a very common and much approved matrimonial cause of treatment which is often very effective it once introduced Mr. Saabari to begging as a special favor to be allowed to say what Mrs. Saabari was most curious to hear after a short duration the permission was most graciously conceded it's only about young twist my dear Mr. Saabari very good looking boy that my dear he needs me but he's enough observed the lady there's an expression of melancholy in his face my dear resumes the Saabari which is very interesting he would make a delightful mute my love Mrs. Saabari looked up with an expression of considerable wonderment Mr. Saabari remarked it and without allowing time for any observation on the good lady's part proceeded I don't mean a regular mute to attain grown-up people my dear but only for children's practice it would be very new to have a mute in proportion my dear you may depend upon it it would have a superb effect Mrs. Saabari who had a good deal in the undertaking way was much struck by the novelty of this idea but as it would have been compromising a dignity to have said on the existing circumstances she merely inquired with much sharpness why such an obvious suggestion did not present itself to a Muslim's mind before Mr. Saabari rightly construed this as an acquiescence in his proposition he was speedily indetermined therefore that all the verses be at once initiated into the mysteries of the trade and with this view that he should accompany his master on the very next occasion of his services being required the occasion was not long in coming half an hour after breakfast next morning must a bumble out into the shop and supporting his cane against the counter drew for this large letter in pocketbook in which he selected a small scrap of paper which he's handed over to Saabari aha said the young taker glancing over it with lively countenance in order for coffin there for a coffin first and for a parochial funeral afterwards applied Mr. Bumble placing him a strap without other in pocketbook which like himself was very corpulent Payton said the undertaker looking for a scrap of paper to Mr. Bumble I have never heard the name before Bumble shook his head and as he replied obstinate people Mr. Saabari very obstinate proud too I'm afraid sir proud applied Mr. Saabari with a sneer calm that's too much oh it's sickening applying the name antimonial Mr. Saabari so it is acquiesced the undertaker we only heard of the family the night before last said the people and we shouldn't have known anything about them then only a woman who lodged in the same house made an application to the parochial committee for them to send the parochial surgeon to see and the womaness was very bad he'd gone out to dinner bought his apprentice which is a very clever lad sent him some medicines and blackening bottle of hand ah that's promptness said the undertaker promptness indeed applied the beetle but what's the consequence what's the ungrateful behaviour of those rebels sir why the husband sends back word that the medicine won't suit his wife's complaint and so she shan't take it says she shan't take it sir good strong holds the medicine what was given with great success to two Irish labourers and a co-weaver only a week before sent him for nothing just a blackening bottle in and he sends back word she shan't take it sir as the atrocity itself to our soul bumbles mind and full force he struck that counter sharply with his cane and he came flush within his nation to the undertaker I never did never did sir ejaculated the beetle no no let nobody ever did no she's dead we've got to bury her and that's the direction and the sooner it's done the better thus saying Mr Bumble tore on his cocked hat alongside first in his fever and parochial excitement and flounce out of the shop why he was so angry on her that he forgot even to ask after you said Mr Savory looking after the beetle as he strode down the street yes sir applied with Oliver who would carefully kept himself out of sight during the interview and he was shaking from head to foot the mere recollection of the sound of Mr Bumble's voice he didn't have taken the trouble to shrink from Mr Bumble's glance however for that functionary on whom the prediction of the gentleman and the white waist skirt had made a very strong impression thought that now the undertaker had got Oliver upon trial the subject was better avoided until such time as he should be firmly bound for seven years and all dangerous being returned upon the vans of Perish should be thus effectively illegally overcome well since Mr Savory taking up his hat as soon as this job is done the better now look after the shop Oliver put on your cap and come with me Oliver obeyed and followed his master on his professional mission they walked on for some time for the most crowded and densely inhabited part of the town and then striking down a narrow street more dirty and miserable than any they had yet passed through paused to look for the house which was the object of their search the houses on either side were high and large but very old and tenanted by people of a porous class as a neglected appearance would have sufficiently denoted without the concurrent testimony a cornered by the swallowed looks of the few men and women who with folded arms and bodies half doubled occasionally sculpt along a great many of the tenements had shop fronts but these were fast closed mouldering way only the upper rooms being inhabited some houses which had become insecure from age and decay were forbidden from falling into the street by huge beams of wood rear not against the walls and firmly planted in the road but even these crazy dens seemed to have been selected as nightly haunts of some houseless wretches for many if they were off-boards which supplied the place of a window or wrench from their positions to offer an aperture wide enough for the passage of a human body the kennel was stagnant and filthy the very rats which the ear in there putify in its rottenness were hideous with their famine there's either not a normal bell handle with the open door while Oliver and his master stopped so groping his way cautiously through the dark passage and bidding Oliver keep close to him and not be afraid that the go mould to the top of the first flight of stairs sumbling against the door and the landing wrapped at it with his knuckles is opened by a young girl of 13 or 14 the undertaker at once saw enough of what the room contained to know it was the apartment to which he had been directed he stepped in Oliver followed him there was no fire in the room but a man was crouching mechanically over the empty stove a new woman too had drawn on all of stools the cold half and sitting beside him there were some ragged children in another corner and in a small recess opposite the door they lay upon the ground something covered with an old blanket Oliver shuddered as he cast his eyes toward the place and crept in volunteering closer to his master for though it was covered up the body felt it was a corpse the man's face was steamed and very pale his hair was and beard were frizzly and his eyes were bloodshot the woman's face was wrinkled there were two remaining teeth protruded over an upper lip and her eyes were bright and piercing Oliver was afraid to look at either her or the man they seemed so like the rats he had seen outside nobody should go near her should the man starting fiercely up as the undertaker approached the recess keep back damn you, keep back if you were a like to lose nonsense my good man said the undertaker was pretty well used to misery in all shapes not in sense I tell you she was shaking her hands and stamping furries on the floor I tell you I won't have her put into the ground she couldn't rest there the worms wouldn't worry not eat her she is so worn away the undertaker offered no reply to this raving that produced a tape from his pocket knelt down for a moment by the side of the body said the man bursting into tears and sitting on his knees at the feet of the dead woman kneeled down kneel round to everyone of you and mocked my words I say she is starved to death I never knew how bad she was till the fever came upon her and then her bones were starting to look the skin it was either fire or candle she died in the dark in the dark she couldn't see her children's faces they were gasping out their names I begged her in the streets they sent me to her prison when it came back she was dying my heart just dried up but they starved to death before God that saw it they starved her he twined his head ends toon his hair and with a loud scream rolled growling upon the floor his eyes fixed and the foam covered his lips the terrified children cried bitterly but the old woman who'd hear too remained as quiet as if she had been wholly deaf to all that passed menaced them into silence having allused the cravat the man who still remained astended on the ground she tottered all the undertaker she was my daughter said old woman nodding her head in the direction of the corpse speaking with an idiotic glare more ghastly than even the presence of death in such a place Lord, Lord well it is strange that I who gave birth to her was a woman then alive and married now and she lying there so cold and stiff Lord, Lord do think of it it's as good as a play as a wretched creature mumbled and shuckled in her hideous merriment the undertaker turned to go away stop stop said the old woman in a loud whisper will she be buried tomorrow next day or tonight I laid her out and I must walk send her large cloak good Lord, Lord for it is bitter cold which would have caked wine too before we go if her mind sent some bread a little bit of bread in the cup of water shall we send some bread dear she said either latching the undertaker's coat as he once more moved toward the door yes, yes the undertaker of course, anything you like he disengaged himself from the old woman's grasp and drawing all of her after him hurried away the next day the family had been meanwhile relieved with the bath, quarter and loaf and a piece of cheese and left them by Mr Bumble himself Oliver and his master returned to the miserable boat where Mr Bumble had already arrived accompanied by four men from the workhouse and the old black cloak had been thrown over the rags of the old woman and the man the bear coffin having been screwed down was hosted on the shoulders of the bearers and carried into the street now you must put your blessed leg foremost this bit of sabre in the old woman's ear we are rather late and it won't do as quick as you like as directed the bearers trotted on under the night burden and two mourners kept it near them as they could and Mr Sabre walked at this good smart pace in front and Oliver whose legs were not as long as his master's ran by the side it was not so great a necessity for hurrying as Mr Sabre had anticipated however when they reached the obscure corner of the churchyard in which the nistels grew and where the parish graves were made the clergyman had not arrived and the clerk who was sitting at the vestry room fire seemed to think it by no means improbable that might be an hour so they put the beer on the brink of the grave and the two mourners waited patiently in the damn clay with the curled rain drizzling down where the ragged boys whom the spectacle that attracted into the churchyard played a noisy game at height and seek among the tombstones or varied their amusements by jumping backwards and forwards over the coffin Mr Sabre in Bumble being personal friends of the clerk set by the fire with him and read the paper a length after an hour of something more than an hour Mr Bumble and Sabre and the clerk were seen running toward the grave immediately afterwards the clergyman appeared putting on his pleases that he came along Mr Bumble then thrashed the boy to keep up appearances and then revered gentlemen having read as much as the burial services could be compressed into four minutes gave his pleases to the clerk and walked away again said, ah very to the grave digger fill up it was no very difficult task the grave was so full that the uppermost coffin was within a few feet for service the grave digger shuggled in the earth stamped it loosely down with his feet shoulder dismayed and walked off followed by the boys the murmured very loud complaints of the bun being over so soon come my good fellow said Bumble tapping the man on the back they want to shut up the yard the man who had never once moved since he had taken his station near the graveside started raised his head, stared at the person who would address him, walked forward for a few paces and fell down in a swoon the crazy old woman was too much occupied in the wailing loss of her cloak which the undertaker had taken off to pay him any attention so they threw a can of curled water over him and when he came to saw him safely out the churchyard locked the gate and parted on the front ways well Oliver said somebody as they walked home how do you like it pretty well thank you sir replied Oliver with considerable hesitation not very much sir oh you'll get used to it in time Oliver said somebody nothing when you are used to it my boy Oliver wondered in his own mind he had taken a very long time to get Mr. Sauer very used to it but he thought it better not to ask the question and walk back to the shop thinking over all he had seen and heard end of chapter 5 of Oliver Twist chapter number 6 of Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens this liver box recording is in the public domain recording by Arthur Piantodosi chapter 6 Oliver being goaded by the taunts of Noah rouses into action and rather astonishes him the months trial over Oliver was formally apprenticed it was a nice sickliest season just at this time in the commercial phrase coffins are looking up in the course of a few weeks Oliver required a deal of experience the excess of Mr. Sauer but his ingenious speculation exceeded even his most sanguine hopes the older inhabitants recollected no period at which measles had been so prevalent or so fatal to infant existence and many were the mournful processions which were all further ahead and a half man reaching down to his knees indescribable admiration and emotion of all the mothers in the town as Oliver accompanied his master in his adult expeditions too an order that he might acquire equanimity of demeanor and full command of nerve which was essential to a finished undertaker he had many opportunities observing a beautiful resignation and fortitude which some strong-minded people bear their trials and loss for instance when Sauer but he had an order for the burial of some rich old lady who was surrounded by a great number of nephews and nieces who had been perfectly inconsolable during the previous illness and whose grief had been wholly impressable even on most public occasions they would be as happy among themselves need be quite cheerful and contented conversing together with as much freedom and gaiety as if nothing whatsoever had to happen to disturb them husbands too bore the wives of their wives with the most heroic calmness Wires again put out weeds for their husbands as if so far from grieving in the garb of sorrow they'd made up their minds to render it as becoming and attractive as possible it was observable too that ladies and gentlemen were in the passions of anguish during the ceremony of internment but covered almost as soon as they reached home and beque quite composed after all the tea drinking was over all of this was very unpleasant and unproving to see and all of her beheld it with great admiration that all of her twist was moved to resignation by the example of these good people I cannot and there I am as bygled for undertake to affirm with any degree of confidence but I can distinctly say that for many months he continued meekly to submit to the dominion ill treatment of Noah Claypole who was him far worse than before now that his jealousy was aroused a new boy promoted to the black stick and hack band well he, the old one remained stationary in the muffin cap and leathers charlotte treated him ill because Noah did Mrs. Saabari was his decided enemy because Mr. Saabari was disposed of his friend so between these three on one side and the glad of funerals on the other all of her was not altogether as comfortable as a hungry pig was when he was shot up by mistake in the grained apartment of a brewery and now I come to a very important passage in Oliver's history for I have to recall an act slight and unimportant perhaps in an appearance but which indirectly reduced a material change in all his future prospects and proceedings one day Oliver Noah had descended into the kitchen at the usual dinner banquet upon a small joint of mutton pound and a half of the worst end of the neck when a charlotte being called out of the way there endured a beef interval of time which Noah clay pulled being hungry and vicious considered he could not possibly devote to a worthy appropriateness then aggravating and tantalizing all of her twist intent upon this innocent amusement Noah put his feet on the tablecloth and pulled Oliver's hair and twitched his ears and expressed his opinion that he was a sneak and furthermore announced his intention of scumming to see him hanged whenever that desirable event will take place he entered upon various topics of petty annoyance like a malicious and ill conditioned charity boy as he was but making Oliver cry Noah attempted to be more facetious still and in his attempt did what many sometimes do to this day when they want to be funny he got rather personal work us sonar she's dead replied Oliver don't you say anything about her to me Oliver's colour rose as he said this he breathed quickly and there was a curious working of the mouth and nostrils which Mr Claypill thought must be the immediate precursor of a violent fit of crying under this impression he returned to the charge what did you die workers for broken hearts some of her old noses told me replied Oliver I think I know what it must be to die of that don't you roll roll right for lorry workers said Noah as a cheer roll down to Oliver's cheek won't set you a sliverly no not you replied Oliver sharply that's enough don't say anything more to me about her you better not better not name Noah well better not work house don't be impeded your mother too she was a nice one she was oh Lord oh Lord nodded his head curled up as much of his small red nose his muscular action can collect together for the occasion you know workers and said you know emboldened by Oliver's silence and speaking in a jeering tone infected pity of all the tones most annoying you know workers it can't be helped no but of course you couldn't help it then and I am very sorry for it and I'm sure we all are and pity her very much but you must know workers your mother was a write down badon what did you say inquired all of her looking up very quickly a regular write down badon workers replied Noah and it's a great deal better workers that she died when you did or else she'd have been hardly bringin bride well or transported or hung which is more likely than either isn't it crimson with fury Oliver started up overthrew the chair and table sees Noah by the throat shook him in the violence of his rage till his teeth chattered in his head and collected his whole force with one heavy blow felled him to the ground a minute ago the boy looked the quiet child millial dejected creature that harsh treatment had made him but his spirit was roused at last the cruel insult to his dead mother had set his blood on fire his breast heaved his attitude was erect his eye bright and vivid his whole person changed as he stood glaring over the cowardly tormentor who now lay crouching in his feet and fighting with an energy he'd never known before oh murder me blubbered Noah Charlotte misses here's a new boy murder me help help Oliver's gone mad charlotte no shouts were responded to by a loud scream from charlotte and a louder one from mrs. salary the former of whom rushed into the kitchen by a side door well the later pulls on the staircase till she was right certain it was consistent with the preservation of human life to come further down oh you little wretch named charlotte seizing Oliver with her utmost force which was about equal to greatly a strong man in particularly good training oh you little ungrateful murderous horrid villain and between every syllable charlotte gave Oliver a blow accompanying it with a scream for the benefit of society charlotte's fist was by no means a little one but less it shouldn't be an effectual and calming Oliver's wrath mrs. salary plunged into the kitchen and assisted hold him with one hand while she scratched his face further in this favorable position of affairs Noah rose to the ground and pummeled him from behind this was rather too violent exercise to last long when they were all wearied out and could tear and beat no longer they dragged Oliver scruggling and shouting but nothing daunted into the dust cellar and there looked him up it's being done mrs. salary sunk into a chair and burst into tears bless her she's going off charlotte a glass of water Noah yeah make haste oh charlotte said mrs. salary speaking as well as she could through a deficiency of breath and a sufficiency of cold water which Noah had pulled over her head and shoulder oh charlotte what a mercy we had made not to abandon in our beds oh mercy indeed mam was the reply I only hope this old teaching master not to have any more of these dreadful creatures that are born to be murderers and robbers from the very cradle poor Noah he was all but killed mam when I came in poor fellow said mrs. salary looking piteously on the charity boy Noah whose top waistcoat button might have been somewhat on level with the crown of all of his head robbed his eyes with the inside of his wrist while the commissuration was bestowed upon him and performed some effecting tears and sniffs what's to be done exclaimed mrs. salary your master's not at home there's a man in the house and you're kicked out all down in ten minutes all of us vigorous plungers against that bit of timber in question run to this occurrence highly probable dear dear I don't know mam said charlotte need we can then for the police officers all the military there's just a mr. lay pole no no no said mrs. salary thinking herself of all of his old friend run to mr. bumble until he become here directly not to lose him in it never mind your cap make haste you can hold a knife to that black eye cause you'll run along it'll keep the swelling down Noah stopped to make no reply but started off at his fullest speed and very much at a staunchest people who were out walking to see a charity boy tearing through the streets with no cap on his head and a class knife to his eye end of chapter six of all of our twist