 You're on YouTube, guess what? People are entitled to say whatever the f*** they want about your video. It's called freedom of speech. You put something out there, get ready to be f***ing criticized, baby. All I said was like, yeah, like watching that, I could be like, oh, that girl seems crazy. You watched my video and you made an assumption saying, I'm mocking people with disassociated identity disorder. What the f*** did you f***ing watch at you dumb little p***? All right. So yeah, Trisha Paytas made a very angry video towards Anthony Padilla. And again, like I said in my last video, if you understand borderline personality disorder, which Trisha has said she's been diagnosed with, you'll understand Trisha Paytas a little bit more. But aside from anger issues, Trisha Paytas sent some very disturbing tweets towards Anthony Padilla. And we're going to be talking about being held emotionally hostage because it's never okay and we have to set boundaries. What is up, everybody? This is Chris from the Rewired Soul, where we talk about the problem, but focus on the solution. And if you're new to my channel, my channel is all about mental health. Sometimes what I do is I take topics going on in the YouTube community, try to see what we can learn about ourselves or maybe some others. So if you're into that stuff, make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell. And before we get started, a huge, huge thank you to all of the new subscribers as well as all the old subscribers who have been around forever, the true Rewired Soldiers. But we just hit 80,000 subscribers. So thank you so much. Those of you who missed it yesterday, there's a lot of coronavirus anxiety going on yesterday. I made a video with 11 facts to help calm your anxiety during this time. So make sure you go check that out if you're freaking out like me and many others with anxiety disorders are, all right? So yeah, let's jump into this. Trisha Paytas, she made a video yesterday, a very angry video. You saw a clip of that in the intro. I'll show another clip in a second. But those of you who are new here, my channel is to help people better understand, you know, different mental illnesses, the diagnoses and everything. These videos, this one and the one I made the other day, in no way are they intended to, you know, send people to go harass Trisha or say, yeah, you know, I knew this about her. She made a very dumb decision and I saw a lot of people are empathizing with Trish, but I also received some comments from people who better understood, you know, somebody with BPD in their own life or maybe their own. So a couple of the comments that I got and these are the people, you know, who I'm making the videos for as well as all of you to better understand this stuff. So this one says, this video made me understand my mom so much more when I told my mom that I had been diagnosed with DID, well, told that I definitely show signs of having it. She instantly said that she has it too. She's always been the kind of person that if you have something, she has it too, but way worse than you do. The next one said, she said she takes traits from people, DID isn't a personality. I feel bad. She has no sense of self. It's actually sad. The next one says, so at first I was really, really disgusted with her. Now after your video, I'm just sad for her. It's really evident that she needs some serious help in therapy. This is a great video and brings a small light to a very dark situation. So yeah, I do hope Trisha Pates gets help, but more importantly, I hope some of you out there, you know, get help if you're struggling with your mental illness. Like I have, I have known so many people with BPD who I've worked with at the Addiction Treatment Center and everything who have learned to manage it and it's through therapy. If you need therapy resources, they'll be down in the description below. But also if you want to better understand somebody in your life who has borderline personality disorder, or if you have borderline personality disorder, I had somebody reach out to me yesterday and they can't afford therapy just now. So two books I highly recommend are I Hate You Don't Leave Me and Stop Walking on Eggshells, okay? I'm going to discuss Stop Walking on Eggshells in just a minute, all right? Yo, I was just sitting down to edit and I forgot to mention that up in the info card, I will link an entire playlist that I have about borderline personality disorder symptoms, what causes it, all that kind of stuff. And I will also link it in the end card. So go ahead and check out that playlist if you want to learn more about borderline personality disorder. But anyways, let's take a look at one of these clips. You have no clue. You have no clue. And I am so pissed when people want to try and tell me how I feel, what I think, what's in my mind, what I identify as, what I constantly am going through. Okay, it's more than just naming personalities, Trish. Well, that's what I do. That's what I do when I open up about it and then get on and be like, you're not this, you're not, you can't watch someone's videos and constantly be like, which personality is this Trish? Oh, this girl has a mental illness and then they open up about the struggles they do face and they are facing me every fucking day. Do you think I'm waking up not knowing who I'm going to be that day? Or do you think I like being in relationships where all of a sudden I do switch? You have never been in a relationship with me. You are not close to me, my own family, any boyfriend, they know I switch. I have a switch and it's the scariest thing to live with. All right, so in the last video, what we talked about was emotional regulation issues with borderline personality disorder. All right, it's emotions to the extreme. So it's not just getting happy. It's getting it static. It's not just getting sad. It's getting depressed, but it's not just getting angry or upset or annoyed. It is getting furious. Okay, although I don't like the term, this is often known as BPD rage. Okay, this is something that makes relationships with somebody with borderline personality disorder so difficult. And aside from emotional regulation issues, there are reasons that this happens in relationships with friends, family members, significant others. Sometimes it's based on this fear of abandonment, so they push people away or they're so scared that the person's going to leave them and this sense of insecurity makes them fly into a rage. But part of this too, we also have to understand one of the other major symptoms, which is black and white thinking, okay? I argue that to some degree, all of us have black and white thinking in some form or another, okay? Black and white thinking is very, very one way or another. It's all or nothing, right? Somebody is either all good or they are all bad. So if you know somebody with borderline personality disorder, one day you might be the best person in their life. You might be the love of their life. You might be their savior and all that. But you do one thing, boom, you're on the other side, right? And you are the worst person ever, okay? And it's hard to find that middle ground when you're struggling with borderline personality disorder and part of therapy, by the way, I forgot to put the disclaimer at the beginning. It's in the description of all my videos. I'm not a therapist, okay? I just read a lot of books. I've worked with people who have borderline personality disorder and other disorders at the treatment center. But anyways, therapy helps people with borderline personality disorder find that middle ground and realize that people aren't all good or all bad. For example, good people can do bad things. Bad people can do good things, right? So you might have a very loving mother and then one day they set up a boundary with you or they can't do something for you and you get extremely upset, all right? But on the other hand, there are bad people who can sometimes be good. This is sometimes why people get into toxic relationships like, oh, I know they do a lot of these bad, terrible things. But right now they're being all good to me, right? So sometimes people with borderline personality disorder are stuck in very toxic relationships. But I feel like what we're seeing with Trisha Paytas is this emotional regulation problem she snapped. Snapped at Anthony Padilla. And it was based on just a 15 second Instagram story. 15 second Instagram story. And Trisha Paytas took it very, very, very seriously, right? Like this might upset some people. I understand, I understand why Trisha would get upset, especially if she feels that she has this disorder. But in my opinion, I don't think whether Trisha Paytas realizes it or not, a lot of people were offended because when you're self-diagnosing and then also misrepresenting the illness, it could be very offensive. For example, I'm a drug addict. I learn not to take stuff so seriously. Like I just don't. But like, there is this little ting of annoyance when people are like, oh my god, I am so addicted to this. I'm like, really? Would you use it until you died? Because that's what I do with drugs and alcohol. You know what I mean? For example, people with OCD. They hate when people are like, oh, I'm so OCD. I like my desk neat and tidy. Like that is not OCD, right? Or people who say like, oh, I was traumatized by this. People with PTSD can get offended by that because these are illnesses that can be completely debilitating. So I hope if nothing else, Trisha understands that. And hopefully she watched Dissocia Did's video on that to have a better understanding of this order and why people might be upset. By the way, somebody pointed out that I pronounced Dissocia Did improperly. I said Dissocia DID, all right? But anyways, now I want to talk about being held as an emotional hostage. Okay, this is a topic that is so, so serious to me. And a lot of people who know somebody who has borderline personality disorder, they've been held emotionally hostage. This is not a representation of everybody with BPD, but it is not uncommon. Okay, the person will hold you emotionally hostage. One of the reasons this is so serious to me is because it comes with suicidal threats. I have known men who dated women with BPD. I have known women who dated men with BPD. And it's that kind of thing where if you leave, I am going to hurt myself, right? And then they say, if you tell anybody, I'm going to hurt myself, right? And you get put in this lose, lose situation. So before I read her tweets, I cannot express to you enough. Please read the book, Stop Walking on Eggshells. If you are in this situation with somebody with BPD in your life, it will help you learn how to set up boundaries. But if you are concerned, if you're concerned, I don't even know why there's a debate about this. But if you're concerned that somebody is going to harm themself, call a wellness check. It is better to be safe than sorry. In the recent four or five years, I've had over 70 people die. Many of them from when I was working at the rehab, not only from overdoses, but from suicides. So I take this stuff very seriously. So if you're concerned, you call a wellness check. And if need be, they will be put on a 48 to 72 hour hold until they calm down or get the treatment that they need. Sometimes that's extended. But if you know somebody in your life who is threatening suicide, do not be afraid to call in a wellness check. For those of you who wondering what I'm talking about, Trisha Paytas sent a few text messages out, not text messages, tweets out towards Anthony Padilla. The first one says Anthony Padilla, quote unquote, claims he has had depression slash anxiety, but quote unquote mocks a manic depressive suicidal human. You can move me to trash Anthony Padilla, just make sure you and your girlfriend, I roll my death and post it to your IG story because it's probably just for attention, right? Then she tweeted out, since Anthony Padilla knows my mind so well, please tell me how this ends. And it says people can only be pushed so far. Like it's not okay. That is not okay in any way, shape or form, all right? Threatening to harm yourself, threatening to kill yourself is never okay. Like I empathize so much with people with mental illnesses. I encourage them to get help, but something that I always taught my clients when I was working at the rehab is your mental health is your responsibility. Just because you have a mental illness does not give you the right to treat people that way, right? Like for example, I've been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder as well as depression. When my anxiety is going crazy, I can get very angry and snappy and upset. And that's not fair to my girlfriend. That's not fair to my son, okay? And a few people messaged me asking about Tricia and I will say this, like I don't know Tricia, right? But she was doing so well last year. She was doing so well last year and you see this correlation, like you see it and you see it with the people in your lives too. I see it with drug addicts and alcoholics every single day. Tricia was doing so well when she was going hardcore to therapy. When she was hardcore in therapy, she was talking about practicing DBT skills. She was talking about working on her anxiety. She had like a book that she showed with like worksheets on how to manage your anxiety and other symptoms of mental illness. And I was so proud of her. And then what happened was what it looked like was she went on her tour and then never came back and started returning what she was doing in therapy. And it bums me out because so many people, so many people, they don't see it, right? Like for somebody like me and maybe you from the outside looking in, you see a person who is doing so good in therapy, right? And then they stop going. One of the common reasons this happens is, oh, I'm doing fine. I don't need to go to therapy or oh, I'm doing fine. I don't need to take my medications. But what we forget is we're doing fine because the therapy is working. We're doing fine because the medications are working. So when Tricia Paytas says these kind of things towards Anthony Padilla as well as Mikey from Glamingor, it's not okay. This is never okay, especially on such a public platform because one of the things that a lot of people have been bringing up and it's one of the reasons I'm trying to work on myself and the way I present my channel is when you have this kind of following, you're showing people which behaviors are okay, right? So the fact that Tricia Paytas goes on Twitter with her massive following and threatens harming herself, that might be giving people the idea that it's okay to threaten the people in their lives, okay? But the last thing I'll say is, if you feel like you are being held emotionally hostage, check out that book, Stop Walking On Eggshells. Both those BPD books I mentioned will be down in the description. As well as therapy will be linked down in the description, okay, but you need to learn how to set up boundaries. My life got a lot better when I realized I am not responsible for another person's actions. I am not responsible for their actions. I will be there to love and care for them. I will provide them with whatever resources I can, but when they start threatening these things, I have to cut them off and if I am that concerned, I have to call in a wellness check. I have called in many, many wellness checks before and I do not regret a single one, all right? But anyways, like I said, I hope you understand borderline personality disorder a little bit more, whether it's for yourself or someone in your life. And again, don't be afraid to go get therapy. The link down in the description is an affiliate link for BetterHelp. I use BetterHelp online therapy. It is so simple to use. So simple to use. You can find a good therapist who specializes in different disorders, different treatments and all that. And basically if you use the link down in the description, a little bit comes back to support the channel and what I'm doing here because YouTube loves demonetizing, all right? But anyways, that's all I got for this video. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. If you're new, make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell. And a huge, huge thank you to everybody who supports the channel over on Patreon, as well as everybody who supports the channel by buying my mental health books at therewiredsoul.com and the Rewired Soul merch from the merch store, all right? And my girlfriend might be designing some new merch. So stay tuned. Thanks again for watching. I'll see you next time.