 hey survivors in this video I'm going to be talking about how narcissists use conversations to obtain supply please like comment share subscribe click the bell icon to receive notifications my future videos if you would like to donate my PayPal links in a video description if you are interested in one-on-one coaching you can email me at Narcisfab coaching at gmail.com narcissists use conversations to obtain supply when a narcissist starts a conversation with you they always have a hidden agenda they have hidden intentions or motives these hidden intentions or motives could be different depending on whether you are a positive source of supply or a negative source of supply to the narcissist if you are in the love bombing phase you will be a positive source of supply in this situation the narcissist will see you as someone who is attractive or useful in some way they will interact with you with the hidden intention or motive of getting your attention and admiration they might display something of value or significance to you for you to compliment them or they might compliment you first while expecting you to compliment them in return this is all designed to feed their ego boost their self-esteem and regulate their emotions it may seem as though they are interested in you but really they are just using you as a positive source of supply if you are in the devaluation or discard phase you will be a negative source of supply to the narcissist in this situation the narcissist will see you as being an attractive or useless they will always have an agenda when they are interacting with you but when you are a negative source of supply it won't always be hidden the narcissist will use the conversation to emotionally or psychologically abuse you they will start arguments or intentionally disagree with you for this sole purpose the narcissist doesn't care about what you have to say they just want to use the conversation to get their rocks off they will use the conversation to unload all of their misery and negativity onto you if you try to ask a question or make a point they will talk over you they don't care about what you have to say it's all about them it's all about them releasing the painful negative emotions that they feel inside they will push and provoke you until you do react to them until you express the very emotions that they are trying to project onto you then they will appear to be calm or relieved because they have just used you as a tool to regulate their emotions the narcissist motive in a conversation is to emotionally or psychologically abuse you their whole agenda is to obtain supply notice how drained you feel once the conversation with a narcissist is over you might have felt so happy and positive before the conversation pay attention to how you feel it is a clear indicator whether you are dealing with a narcissist or a toxic person if you were interacting with someone who is emotionally healthy or functional you will not feel drained and lifeless after the conversation you would not feel any confusion or uncertainty you would not feel as though you have just been abused was though you have just had your reality altered emotionally healthy functional people will not target your emotions they will not put you down to make themselves feel as though they are above you if you want to know how a person feels within pay attention to how they are trying to get you to feel notice how when you are around a person who is genuinely happy or contented it's very contagious it's the same thing with narcissists their emotions are contagious too if you start feeling negative emotions around them such as hatred or anger you may be dealing with a narcissist or toxic person when you are interacted with a narcissist they will often say things that are irrelevant or don't really make any sense the reason for this is because the narcissist is only looking for things they can use to obtain supply if you question them or confront them or if you're trying to reach a resolution with a narcissist they will quickly change the subject or end the conversation they are not going to admit what they are trying to do or reveal their hidden intentions or motives they want to continue doing what they are doing it helps to feed their ego boost their self-esteem and regulate their emotions it sustains them it's keeping them going they don't want it to end narcissists don't really like serious or deep conversations it makes it very difficult for them to obtain supply they prefer small talk or they like to hold the conversation on their own while you listen to what they have to say while they observe your reactions it feeds them it makes them feel alive they are fascinated by how you react to them because they don't react in that natural unconditioned way everything they do is scripted or taken from from someone else they will often observe how you interact and use it to appear more natural in conversations when you are talking to a narcissist and you reference an expert or professional or any factual information or statistics they will be quick to dispute and criticize the experts or professionals especially if the information or statistics go against what they want to believe or if the information or statistics is less favorable for them or against them narcissists want to leave what they want to believe not what is proven or truthful they will manipulate information to suit their own logic which isn't logical at all they will even rewrite the past to suit their own ideas or beliefs in their minds it makes sense even if it defies all logic in reality narcissists live in their own fantasy world where they can do or say whatever they like if it makes sense to them it should make sense to you that's how they see it they create a crazy world when nothing makes any sense and they expect you to conform to their craziness and start seeing things in the distorted way that they do you can talk about logic and facts to them all day it doesn't make any sense to them they are living in an alternate reality where logics logic rules and the laws of science have a completely different interpretation you cannot make sense of their reality unless you enter it yourself and by doing that you will only become crazy like them when you are regularly interacting with a narcissist you will start to become more like them you will begin to see the world in the way that they do they will force their reinterpretations or distorted meanings on to you and expect you to see it in the same way while you are conversing with them everything may seem fine and they are understanding the reinterpretations or distorted meanings that you have adopted from them but once you leave them and go into the real world with these alternate meanings or interpretations you realize that it's not compatible with the real world it is not compatible with anyone who is logical or reasoning narcissists are not compatible with the real world they always try to bring you into their world and that's why the world is the way it is today logic and reasoning will always defeat the narcissist they have to get you to play on their field with their rules and regulations they have to get around your logic and reasoning and affect you emotionally logic is fixed emotions are more flexible so if they can get you to emotionally react suddenly the truth isn't so fixed it's adjustable to their liking and that's exactly how the narcissist wants it to be they don't want to adjust themselves to the world they want the world to adjust to them they expect everyone to change to suit their needs and many people do but what happens when someone doesn't adjust to them or be the way that they want them to be they are alienated smear campaigns are created flying monkeys are enforced because they can't stand it they can't stand independent thinkers they can't stand people who have their own thoughts and ideas they want everyone to adopt their thoughts and ideas because they are more beneficial or favorable for them that's all for this video I hope this video resonate with you please like comment share and subscribe click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos if you would like to donate my PayPal link is in the video description coaching inquiries you can email me at narksevercoaching at gmail.com talk to you soon