 What's up y'all. So today we're going to be revising this video that I've been sent more times than I can count. It's entitled Traditional Man versus 50-50 Man. My immediate thoughts are, I think this is a very necessary conversation. I think right now we're at a pivot point as a society. Men's role in the family in society at large is slowly being redefined and we're trying to figure out what works. If the old way of doing things works or the modern way of doing things works, these days one income is very seldom enough to take care of a household, especially if you have children. But women in mass are still asking for the soft life, which to them is being pampered, being taken care of and being rewarded for just existing. So I'm interested to see how these brothers discuss this. I'll pause it periodically to get my thoughts. It's hard out here. And you're talking about, oh, I'm not a man. If I'm going 50-50 with my woman, you sitting up here in your nice house, your nice jury, nice cars, oh, yeah, man, you got to do 100% how? If I'm making $14 out, what you expect? I'm still working. I'm still providing, right? So what makes me not a man? Because I'm going 50-50 with my woman. This is complicated. Not only do women still desire a man who can take leadership, take control, a man who can cover her, despite her ability to contribute financially, she doesn't want to. And what's difficult is in this modern day where women are making money, sometimes more money than their spouse, it is next to impossible for her to defer power and allow the book to still stop with a man because all money is is paper power. And that's why for me, I'm not a fan of men dating or seeking serious romantic relationship with women until they're at the very least on the path to their purpose. The late Dr. Miles Monroe, he would say that the first thing God gave Adam wasn't a wife. It was a purpose. It was a job. He said, tend to this garden, the animals and the plants in this garden, because not only is this your primary responsibility, this is how you're going to eat. And after he gave Adam Eve to help him tend to the garden, that same garden is what fed Eve. And obviously that's a Judeo-Christian story and parable. But the reality is a lot of our societies across the world and from the beginning of time have been based on this principle of there is a greater deity or deities that we follow. And under that is the men who fight in the name of that deity when they go to war with other tribes or other countries or other nations or other empires. And then under that is the women and we've operated under that hierarchical structure for so long, it's going to be very difficult to transition to a new one. So for me, despite what we're hearing women say, the demand is still for a man who is better. Let's just keep it a buck. The demand is still for a man who is taller, richer, better connected, smarter, because females of every single species on the planet seek out what they perceive as the alpha male to procreate with because he gives their offspring the best opportunity to survive and thrive. And obviously every man, we're not all genetically gifted in that way, but we do have some things we can control. And even Dr. Frances Cress Welsing suggested that black men not settle down until the age of 35 and settled down meaning have children and start a family and black women not settled down to the age of 30. And in her estimation, we give our community the best opportunity to potentially catch up to our white counterparts if we are more strategic, intentional and meticulous with our decision making primarily as it relates to career building and family planning. She also says when you have kids have them no less than three years apart. And I think she said to have no more than three children. There's a lot of debate about that. But I think it's a good place to start, especially, especially, especially for black men, because we're behind the eight ball. Let's just let's just be real about it. So this idea that we established this non proven 50 50 model with women who still require very traditional paradigms of mating and family structure is tough. So I would actually encourage men to get used to being by yourself until you build something for women to help you with. But especially in the modern day when women now have access to everybody else's highlight reel, it's not going to play out the way that you wanted to or the way that we think it used to for our grandparents. That's just the reality. Then it is hard out here, but we are men. So we have to go hard dirt. I'm not saying or trying to speak down to you, my brother, by any means that's that I'm not. But I want you to be reminded of something that our fathers didn't teach us that we must go hard and that we shouldn't get into a relationship with a woman until we have direction. But who are you to say that? Do what you need to do so you can feed your woman and why she's nurturing the children. She can also nurture your dreams and your goals. Now you can be successful. Now you don't have to say I'm working for $15. Now you can say I got employees that I'm paying that's working for me for $15. I'm trying to elevate you. But men get so carpenter emotions and they pride. And the first thing you want to do is feel get the wisdom. This is coming from a rich man. Right now you're coming from a rich man, but right now you're coming from a rich man. But how do I get here? Yeah, like I've said before, boys react and men respond. And this is a perfect example of that. I think one of the distinctions between boyhood and manhood is emotional regulation and actually emotional intelligence. And don't be fooled by the female definition of emotional intelligence where it's like I'm embracing of all my emotions. No emotional intelligence also refers to your ability to regulate your emotions and your ability to keep yourself in check, your ability to be stoic when it's needed, your ability to shut up and listen, your ability to be observant, your ability to not be reactive. And very often what we see with the quote unquote 5050 archetype men is because of their upbringing, very often they have picked up effeminate traits, the need to have the last word, the need to interject with your immediate thoughts instead of holding it back until it's your turn to speak, the need to defend yourself even when you're not under attack. Part of the reason feminine energy craves masculine energy is because in her subconscious, she realizes that she needs that balance to her chaos. So if you have a similar chaos as a male, she can never respect you and you've effectively turned your relationship into a lesbian one. So I want you all to pay attention to how the quote unquote rich man articulates himself and how the quote unquote 5050 man articulates himself. And that makes an excuse can't be a man completely. You can be a male, a man comes with responsibilities. And it's hard to be a man. It's hard, brother. It's not easy. That's why the respect you want from your woman that you don't get I get from my respect me respect me respect me respect me respect me you think she respect brother. Has she ever raised her voice at all? No, no, that she cooked for you every night. Of course. So she respects you cooks for you every night. Does she clean the house? Of course, she cleans the house and you got her working 16 hours a day. If I had a conversation with your woman, she'll probably start crying. They tie it. They not built to go through what they they're going through with you. She didn't choose you to struggle. You keep saying who am I to tell you this a man has been in your position. A man has risen above your circumstances. And I'm coming back down to say, this is what you do. You're not a man until you move like this. Most males will die never experience what it feels to be a man and to be complete respected by his women and children because he didn't step into that true king place. Do you understand, brother? If I didn't understand, there's no way possible you could understand. Oh, crazy. No way. Why do you think Look at you. You on the net flash you. Yeah, man. You're not a man. If you're not going 100, your woman don't love you because you're not you're not paying 100% of your bills. She can't. Are you with my woman? Brother. Are you with my woman, brother? Brother. Brother. Are you with my woman? Brother. Let's see. Exactly. In the words of loaded lux. There are two telltale signs when you've lost an argument. Number one, when you become more emotional than your opponent. And number two, ad hominem attacks. When you start attacking, not the opponent's argument, but the opponent. In this scenario, you have a brother who used to be poor and now is rich. Talking to a brother who is currently poor. One person has experienced both lives, both sides of the coin. And the other person is speculating and their defensiveness stops them from listening. The slogan of this channel has been listen, then speak. And I don't only think that that is a hallmark of being a good conversationalist. I think that is imperative to be a great man. It's not about just talking. It's about speaking. And that means speaking to whether it's speaking to the people that you're around or speaking to the concerns or speaking to the situation. But your words have to be precise. One of my favorite sayings is some people talk because they have to say something. And some people talk only when they have something to say. As we watch this, I want you to consider who you are in conversation. Oh, you got your woman. I got mine, brother. Brother, right now, you're dealing in high emotions. You're not even allowed me to finish my sentence. But what may you take this with a divine understanding heart? Because I know how sometimes when we get triggered, we can't hear the love in a message because we feel triggered. We feel ashamed. But I'm saying this, if if you truly love your woman, right? If you truly care for her, all I'm saying is go hard for her. What I'm hearing you say is overwork myself until I'm dead. I can't no longer enjoy this woman. That's what you're saying. Is your family worth that? That's what you're saying. Is your family worth going to war for? Of course. So, brother, you taken on another job to provide for your family's every. But if I continue to work like that, I won't be able to enjoy my family. Being a man is about dying well. As a man, the only thing that matters is your legacy. The only thing that matters is the impact that you left when you're no longer here. You know, we joke sometimes that, you know, grandkids refer to grandma and grandpa's house as grandma's house because women's impact tends to be within the four walls. Men's impact tends to be outside the four walls. A man's focus, in my opinion, should be everything outside of the home, whether it's defending against adversaries outside the home, whether it's going outside the home to earn bread, whereas a woman's focus should be everything in the home. So as a man, your focus should never be enjoyment. Your focus should never be being Mr. Nice Guy. Your focus should never be pleasure. Your focus should be legacy. This is what women respect, ultimately, as much as they might talk about and girls might reward women with penises, these emotional men that they raise, but ultimately what they respect and what they revere are men who leave a legacy after they die. So if you're a man who is so emotional that you're unwilling or unable to see the big picture because you're focused on immediate pleasure, you're not the type of man that I look up to. That's what I'll say. I'm not even going to say you're wrong. I'm just going to say you're not the type of man that history remembers. And if that's not important to you, that's cool. But as for me and the type of man that I like to surround myself with, they care about how their grandchildren remember them. They were created for you to lead them and guide them to be in a better position than you. This is for your language, not just for your personal emotions right now. And sometimes as men, we feel neglected. Sometimes as men, we feel neglected. You're a funny guy. You know what? You're a funny guy. Oh, because at the end of the day, it's a family. You know, we're supposed to be together, laugh, smile, pray together. Not me overwork myself till I have a heart attack. But who's supposed to sacrifice? What do you mean? Who sacrifices for the family can strive, brother? Am I already sacrificing? What's that? What do you mean? Eight hours. While your woman is sacrificing eight hours, coming home, having sex with you, cleaning, cooking, taking care of the children. I don't make my woman do anything that she does, brother. Who are you to tell me I'm not a man because I'm not going 100%? What do you consider a man? What do you mean? What is a man to you? A man that gets up, goes to work. A woman that gives his woman what he can, provides for his family what he can. It breaks my heart that Kevin Samuels is primarily remembered for the viral average of best clip. And that breaks my heart primarily because of all the work that he did prior to that clip talking to men and actually following that clip talking to men. There was one live stream, for instance, I was watching where men were calling in, men in their early 20s in their 30s talking about or complaining about women. And when he asked them about what they do for work, what their profession is, how they earn a living, they either had no answers or very inadequate ones. And for me, I think the value that Kevin brought, it wasn't for women, it was for men. It was the red pill, pun intended, of this is what the world is and this is who you need to become to be competitive in this world. And I think, unfortunately, it was perverted into this is who women need to be to better serve men. But the reality is women are women. And in order to demand the best from them, you have to be a man. And that is not sweet. That is not easy. And that is not feelings oriented. Because ultimately it's about what you do, not who you are, not how you feel. And unfortunately because of the mass incarceration epidemic correlated with the crack epidemic and the fallout of that atomic bomb in our community and the single mother rate and the boys who call themselves men who are a result of those single mothers coming into a world and expecting their female spouses to bear the same weight as their single mothers did, we have this disaster of a community. And unfortunately, it's full of men like him, which makes my job hard or men like me's job hard. Because when women are complaining about niggas ain't this and men are this, they're complaining about men like him. And because of some of these things, there's an abundance of men like him. And with men like him, it's impossible for our community to be competitive, not against the white community, definitely not against the Asian community. And we're just here talking about therapy and feelings. And everybody's triggered, everybody needs safe spaces. One of the things that gives me some optimism, I saw a quote that said, strong men create easy times. Easy times create weak men. Weak men create hard times. Hard times create strong men. Currently in our community, weak men have created hard times. So I'm optimistic to see what happens next. I'm just a man that loves you and majority of us men have never had fathers. And if we did have fathers, they weren't strong, brother. We've never seen our mothers love correctly. So we're repeating what we've seen. We've seen women go hard for so long, we believe it's in their nature to go hard. The queen should never be in a battlefield. But just didn't know a place to say that a man is not a man because he's paying, not paying 100%. So what do you consider that, brother? Because a man is a provider? Of course he is. A provider 100%, brother. You can't do 50% of your job and tell me that you're a provider. You're trying to provide. One of the things that pisses me off about the manosphere is some of these same men who we see preach about being in your masculine frame. Time and time again demonstrate their inability to maintain any frame during conflict. And very often it's a conflict of their own invention. Myron from Fresh and Fit is the first person who comes to mind. When he goes on his soapbox rants where veins are popping out of his head. Whether he's talking to other men or he's talking to a woman. That's an emotional man. Some of the people in the comments are also great examples that instead of addressing the intellectual legitimacy of what was said or what's being said they would instead talk about person and their assumptions about that person. Not rooted in fat but rooted in the attempt to shame the person. Other men see through it and women see through it as well. Look at him. Emotional. Are you striving to take care of your 100%? Who's to say I'm not? I'm asking. But you can't say I'm not. Oh, praises. You're there saying oh yeah man. Brother, I'm striving for it. I'm striving for it. So you're not the brothers I'm talking about. You know you you seem in a society right? None of us want to hit that bullshit Sharif. Hey brother. You know sometimes brother you know we just gotta give all praises due to the most high. And most men are triggered because they gotten comfortable allowing women to provide for them brother. They're not looking for wives. They're looking for mother figures. In the sad part our women are the ones that turn these men the way they are. But why do they do that? Because they've never had a strong man to lead and guide them into the right direction. Ultimately like I said in the beginning I realized it's difficult for one income to support a family these days. However as men we should understand that in order to actually be the master of your domain, the CEO of your household, it means that your woman your children need to look up to you. And that shouldn't be done or enforced by force. That should be done and enforced by your actions. Are you an admirable individual? Are you just like us? Are you pulling more weight and bring more value or are we all on the same level? Now again this new paradigm where it's everything is everything and everybody is equal and let's cater to men's feelings and all the the stuff it's new. I don't think there's enough data to compare it to millennia of history where that's not been the case. To say that this doesn't work as well but I suspect that it doesn't. Because those physiological reasons those societal reasons those cultural reasons that maintained this as people would put it patriarchal paradigm are still in place. Women's genetics have haven't changed even though they're making money. Women's desires haven't changed even though they can take care of themselves. So if you want a woman I would encourage you to position yourself as the type of man who has always been successful with women since the beginning of time. And that's a man who understands that a woman is there to help you with what you're building. Not necessarily to build it with you. Like, share, subscribe. See you guys in the next one. Peace.