 What's coming you lot welcome back to my channel if you're new here hi hello my name is Lydia and today I'm meeting up with my family Last time I took a photo in this mirror, I took a photo in this mirror, I mean the anorexic, which was... The view is so weird, it's a bit what we're being here There's some upstairs, thank you Let's take a look at it, that's my nice fellow brother-in-law I hate being here, our dad is like memory heaven and it's horrible I've been back at the school, it's made me feel horrible I've been back at the school, I've been back at the school as well as I've been on top of that school I've just been, I don't know, it's not... No, it's fine I just didn't think it would like... If you think about it this way, it's been what seven years since I went to that school And the fact that it's still... I didn't think about it normally, but I think being here is just like, it's brought back everything Like the reality of how horrible kids were I'm like, you know, I'm just the staffs, it's the same staff Everything I know, it's my name, staff I remember that, I remember them being like a mum They don't even know But then Thoms was dealing with everything Feels weird being back here There's no way to explain it, with hem weird There was no way to explain it with hem, weird There was no way to explain it with hem weird There's no way to explain it with ehhh you're being here Yeah, I'm through. I love this. Yeah. If you want, don't go and take her out, no. Oh, no. She's both the kind of girls. It's just what you want to be. It's been seven years since I was here. Fucking A-Mab Darby Academy. Pride and joy. They made my life a living hell for five years. I thought I was over it. All the memories. All the lines. So much. That just doesn't work. When I get home, I'm gonna have to clean up some bed. Because it's been so long. It's been since when? Seven years? Eight years? I don't even think about school. I don't think twice about it. It's just set up everything. Horrible. It's my niece's birthday party. I feel horrible. Fuck me. Fuck me. With my family, they went to, well, they're having a party. My niece is having a party. We had a party at a swimming pool. And the swimming pool is at my old secondary school. And I'm so triggered by it all. I'm to a point where I'm actually in tears. I remember being stood over there. I was stood over there. Doing PA. And we had forced a walk around the playground. Because I had a genuine note. They didn't believe me. They thought I was just trying to get out of here. And they made me walk around. And then they showed you later I was diagnosed with chronic arthritis. And it just... They thought I was lying again. I don't know. It brought back a lot of our memories. Yeah. Like this school, the police, the health, the bullying and everything. And it was the first time I stepped foot in there. In seven years. So yeah, my anxiety was a lot. I had lorazepalm. And then I got laughed out by people. Because of how slowed down I was. So that's fun. I got triggered in public. Fucking family edition. Like... To be real, this is the school that left me to fend for myself. We've got the entire talk. I walked five years of my life. And I moved away. And I've never been back again ever since all of that. And I went into a completely dissociative block or at all. And now my family know everything. It's just a little strange that I'm staying at my now. It's because me and my mum don't go on now. For me to live with her. So staying at my now. If I didn't know that coming here would impact me. That's why I wouldn't have come. It's horrible. I had a dupie up there. That's where I used to do PA. And that's where I did that all. Like, I got bullied. When I had a note for PA you had to stand in a group. You'd fly. I was made to stand in a corner on me out there. It was the poor ones. It used me as a blind person. I got proof that it wasn't me. But it's dehumanising. It's wrong. The way the school treats people is wrong. She had no anti-bullying policies which is what's wrong at school. If they didn't have proper procedures afterwards then no one would end up in a situation when they've got someone pulling knives at home. No, I want to get some more mustard. Are you sure? Do it tomorrow. I'm going to have something to do. I'm going to have something to say to you now. Something to say to you?