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So smoke that smoke of fine tobacco, Lucky Strike. So round, so firm, so fully packed, so free and easy on the draw. Program starring Jack Benny with Mary Livingston, Phil Harris, Rochester, Dennis Day, and yours truly, Don Wilson. Ladies and gentlemen, last Sunday, Jack Benny went out to Hillcrest Country Club to play golf. And on the seventh hole, he hit a terrific slice into the woods and lost his golf ball. But that was last week. So now, let's pick up Jack and Rochester and see what they're doing. Now, let's see. The ball came to the left of this bush, which means it probably hit that rock on the right and bounced off at a 30-degree angle, which would put it a... No, we looked there Monday. Oh, boss! Boss! Yes? It ain't up in this tree, can I come down now? All right. Look, boss, we've been out here all week. Why don't we give up and go home? No, Rochester, we're gonna find that ball. And anyway, what are you complaining about? It's good to get out in the woods close to mother nature and rough it. Maybe so, but if President Truman found out we ate that gopher on Meatless Tuesday, we'd be in trouble. Oh, I don't think we need to worry. They won't start another investigation just for that, I don't think so. Now, let's see. The ball might have bounced to the right here. You ought to give up playing golf. Boss, it upsets you so much when you lose anything. It does not upset me. What about the time when you got the wrong number on the telephone, you didn't get your nickel back? You raised a fuss over that. Don Rise, I raised a fuss. I didn't get you anything. The jury was prejudiced. Now, let's see. If I were a golf ball, where would I go? I'll round the saucer here. Maybe if I... What's that? What's that? It's only a dog. Why? Well, the club had to fix up a dog like this when Phil Harris joined. Run along, doggy. We're busy. Run along. We must have a leak in it. Now, come on, Rochester, let's look over about... Oh, my goodness, it's 12 o'clock. I got to get over to NBC. Drive me down, will you, Rochester? Okay, but are we going to come back after the show and keep looking for the ball? Well, no, I don't think so. Then I better take down the tent. And don't forget to notify the post office we're going back to our old address. Come on. Rochester, drive straight up Sunset to Vine Street. Yes, sir. It's your good to see people again. Yeah. Shine on, shine on Harvest Moon up in the sky. I ain't made no money during August, September, June, and July. Blah, blah. I wonder if I should get a summer show. Blah, blah. Well, pull into that station on the corner there. The attendants seem to be busy. Oh, look, Rochester, there's Norman Krasner having his car filled. He never misses my program. He's the guy in the world. Hey, Norman, Norman, it's me. Honk the horn, Rochester, so we can get some service. Hey, shall I fill her up, sir? Uh, two gallons, please. Oh, hello, Mr. Bennet. Borsa will have to stop again. Well, how much is gas, bud? 21 cents a gallon. 21 cents. Well, all right, fill her up. Yes, sir. 21, 42, 83, 84. Well, that fills it up, Mr. Bennet. Shall I? Mr. Bennet, you lose this car and I'll go get some water. By the way, did you check the tires? Yes, and congratulations. All four of them are there. Good, good. That'll be $1.86 for the gas. Charge it, please. Yes, sir. Your credit card number? 206BY. Your license? Well, we better get going, Rochester. Yes, sir. So long, Norman. Don't take any wooden nickels. Norman has a great sense of humor. Now hurry, Rochester, we'll be late. Okay. Yeah. D.D. D.D. Must be Deanna Durbin. Turn it up, Rochester, we'll hear it. Could be Donald Duck. No, he's in Washington. All right, NBC, Rochester. Now, Rochester, I've been thinking it over. Maybe you ought to go back to the golf course and look for my ball. Things on your fingers and what she has to laugh at romance. Hello, Mr. B. I haven't seen you in quite a while. Are you still working at the drug store? No, no, I lost that job and it was a little bit your fault. My fault? Yes, I'm always listening to your show and on your program, the man is saying keep your eye on the red bull's eye. Yes. Somebody stole the cash register. Oh, I'm much better one. Really? I'm now doing a little extra working pictures. On pictures, that's wonderful. What pictures have you been in? Well, I was in Dark Sausage and Mendel of the Movies and Forever Epstein. First of all, I like to work in westerns. Oh, westerns? They went that way and smile when you say that part now. You're pretty good. You should see me on a horse. I'm looking like Hop along. Cassidy? Oh, well, I gotta run into rehearsal, Mr. Kitzel. See you again, huh? Thank you, and by the way, Mr. Benny, if you ever come out to Republic Studios, look me up. I will. Just ask for a text. Everybody knows me. Okay, goodbye, text. Goodbye. Give me a landlots of landlots. Gosh, NBC is a nice studio. I don't know they keep it so clean and so old. I wish Fibber and Molly would stop waxing these floors. Oh, well. I wonder if Mary's in her dressing room. Hello, Mary. What are you doing? I was just reading the radio, Mary. There's a picture of you here on page 28. Oh, yes. That's the one I had taken when I was in the service. Gee, you were handsome in that uniform. Yeah. Jack, whose arm is that around you? A fella from the draft board. He didn't turn me loose until we got to Europe. Say, what are all those letters over there? A fan mail for our show. Fan mail? That's the biggest batch yet. Any for me? Yes, a bill from Lady Esther. And Jack. What? I got a letter from Mama, too. I must read it to you. A letter from your mother, eh? Yeah. What does the cure for the hiccups have to say? I would have written you sooner, but I've been so busy. Two weeks ago, your uncle Lou and Aunt Ruby dropped in on us from Seattle. And we had to put them up in the little guest house in the back. I hope they leave before Halloween as the kids always tip it over. I want to tell you that your sister, Babe, is getting married next Sunday. Babe's getting married Sunday? This week will be a busy one for her. Tomorrow she's quitting her job. Tuesday and Wednesday she'll buy her going away outfit. Thursday she'll have the final fitting on her wedding gown. And Friday she's making reservations for the honeymoon. I hope she doesn't oversleep Saturday because that's the only day she has left for the honeymoon. What do you mean to say that Babe has... Oh, that Babe has... I was helping her father weatherstrip the house. They were on the third floor and Papa was hanging out the window while Babe was holding her by the feet. And now Papa's in the hospital. How did it happen, Mary? Read on. While Babe was holding Papa out the window, her ex-boyfriend passed by. They had an argument. And Babe thought he said, they're Benzedrine Livingston. Oh, there's more? Tell Jack I heard his first three programs. That was in 1932 and I haven't listened to him since. Your mother thinks she's so smart because she used to be a Gibson girl. Now come on, we better get over on the stage. Look out, Mary. Take it easy because these floors are very slippery. I didn't have any trouble when I came in. Well, I'm warning you, they've just been waxed and the first thing you know, you're... See what I mean? I can get up myself. Don't rehearse anymore, gentlemen. That last rendition was exactly as I wanted it. And before you leave, I'd like to compliment each and every one of you upon your dignified conduct here this afternoon. Now, you may go now and I would appreciate it if you would leave quietly. Patrillo boy. Oh, you should have been here. We just got through rehearsing. I know, Phil. I saw the boys leave. And believe me, I haven't seen a crowd stampede out of a place in such a disorderly manner since... the horn blows at midnight. Only at the preview. Phil, look, Phil, I don't like to keep bringing this up all the time. But look, for 11 years now you've had that same bunch of you should excuse the expression musicians. Now, isn't that right? Yeah, yeah, that's right. And in all that time they have never started together, played on key or ended together. Now... Now, look, Phil. Why? Why don't you fire? I can't do that, Jackson. I gotta keep them working. Why? I promise they're parole board. Well, I don't care what you... I don't want those guys around me. They make me nervous. My boys... Don't worry about them, Jackson. They wouldn't hurt a flea. I know, that's why they have so many of them. I don't mind if they stay on the program but at least make them look presentable. You know, when they're out on the stage. I mean, that's all I ask. Well, I agree with you, Jackson, but it takes time. Look how long it took me to get them to wear neckties. Well, Frankie still doesn't wear one. Well, that ain't my fault. I tried everything. I even gave him a spinal. To put a tie on them? What's Frankie got against a necktie? He don't want nothing around his neck since he had that unfortunate experience under a sturdy oak. I told him a million times when you changed the brand on cattle cover up the old one. Phil, if they hanged him, how did he get away? Adam's apple. I'm serious about your band. Jack, I have a suggestion that might fit in. Oh, hello, Don. What are you going to say? Well, I was just going to suggest that if you don't want the studio audience to see how bad Phil's orchestra really looks, I'll be very happy to sit in front of them. Well, thank you. Thank you. No, you've got a good head on your stomach. I... I really appreciate it. But, oh, Jack, in one way I think you're very lucky. What do you mean, Don? Well, since you're stuck with Phil's band, you can take consolation in the fact that you do have a great quartet. Yes, Don. At least they... What? You mean the sportsman? Yeah. And Jack, since next Friday is Halloween, I thought it would be appropriate if the boys did something in the Halloween spirit and you can join in. Me? Yeah, sure. Oh, that'll be a lot of fun. What's the name of the number, Don? Well, it's called the Ghost Dance. Take it, boys. S-M-F Goblins who know back old eats grow L-S-M-F-T That's the smoke for me. So it's the one you like most House up your show. Come on, kids, let us go right out on the street to play trick or treat. Knocking here soon and go haunting for F. The boys' credit, they really prepared something great. Really, it was very good. It scared me, silly. I was in the doorway when Phil dismissed his boys. The next thing I knew, I was in the bar across the street. Those boys are a little rough. Yeah, they tied me up, threw me on the ground and stuck a hot iron on me. Dennis, stop being silly. If they tied you up, how'd you get away? Chop shoulder blades. Dennis, what's the matter with you coming in here with jokes like that? You sound like Jerry Cologne. How can you do things like that? I don't ask questions, I just have fun. Yes, yes, you know, that ought to be exciting Did you get a reply to the letter you wrote King George regarding the royal wedding? Yes, yes, but he said they wanted a whole orchestra, not just a violin. I can't understand. I was willing to go just for expenses. You know, Mary, I was thinking, it must take a lot of planning to get married in England with the shortages and everything. I mean, even for a princess. Why didn't she get married on the bride and groom program and get a mixed master? Dennis, Dennis, are you crazy? Are you out of your mind? Princess Elizabeth is of royal blood. Her father is the king of England. Her grandfather was the king of England. Her great-grandfather was the king of England. A mixed master is a mixed master. Oh, for heaven's sake. Jack, put down that branding iron. Well, he drives me nuts. Now, let's sit down and get this rehearsal started. Jack, you're acting awfully irritable lately. Oh, he's been like that ever since. Last Sunday when he lost that golf ball. Well, Mary, that was a new golf ball. I only hit it once. Go on, you lost it on the seventh pole. I still only hit it once. Country Club right now and see if Rochester found it. Hand me that phone, Mary. Here you are. Yeah, I wonder what temptation wants now. I'll do it. He wants me to get the Hillcrest Country Club. You know, he lost the golf ball there last Sunday. And what a thing he made. I know, he came in today wearing a black band on his sleeve. What happened to me when I used to go out with Mr. Benny? I'm listening. Gee, maybe I was too harsh on Gertrude. After all, she and Mabel just sit there in that little room by themselves all day long. I wonder what they talk about. Yes, it's none of my business. Come on, kids. Let's get on with the rehearsal. Quality of product is essential to continuing success. At the end of the day, quality of product is essential to continuing success. And lucky strike means fine tobacco. LSMFT. Yes, lucky strike means fine tobacco. And fine tobacco is what counts in a cigarette. Remember what happens at the tobacco auctions? At 50. At auction after auction, year after year, independent tobacco experts can see the makers of lucky strike. Consistently select and buy that fine, that light, that naturally mild tobacco. At 59, American. Lucky strike presents the man who knows Mr. Fred Leonard Evans, independent tobacco buyer of Danville, Virginia, who has attended more than 3,000 auctions. A recognized authority on tobacco, Mr. Evans said... 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