 The mysteries of love, romance, and how relationships work in general has been studied by psychologists for years. There have been countless studies, surveys, and theories all dedicated to enlightening us on the matter. In spite of their best efforts, it seems that we're still generally somewhat clueless when it comes to matters of the heart. In fact, there has been a startling rise in separation and divorce rates over the past decade. This has us shaking our heads and wondering, why are modern relationships so fragile? Let's try to find some answers. Here are 7 key reasons why most relationships nowadays fall apart so easily. 1. You're not ready yet All too often, our relationships dissolve because you're simply not ready to be in one yet. Maybe your needs at the time are to keep things casual and fun, not in a state of serious commitment. A strong, healthy relationship is all about positive compromise, dedication, patience, and sacrifice. Modern relationships seem to have a lost site of that. The unrealistic standards set by mainstream entertainment and social media train us to think that a perfect relationship should be one where we're always happy, with zero conflict, and we're perfectly matched for our partners. We need to understand that this is like believing in heavily filtered Instagram photos. It's not the real or full picture. Once we can accept that, we can move forward towards being ready. 2. You're too busy to settle down Modern society values success, hard work, and accomplishment, though people nowadays have become more competitive and ambitious than ever. It feels good to be the best, in class, at work, being the most popular. To be the best, there is a drive to get into prestigious universities or be promoted to the top of the corporate ladder. With so many other priorities in your life, romantic relationships may simply not match in importance. 3. You're confusing any need for interaction with the need for romantic love. What is love, really? Can you define it? Can you solidly list out things that will tell you 100% yes? This is love, not something else. If you're not totally sure, or you've found yourself asking how do I know this is love, you're not alone, and this confusion is another reason why modern relationships have become so fragile. Maybe what you feel you need isn't actually love. Perhaps you're interpreting your need for excitement or companionship for romantic love. Truth is, love isn't always going to be intense, passionate, or exhilarating. It's also about mutual trust, respect, and partnership. 4. You want something now, not tomorrow. Ever heard something like, good things come to those who wait, or even the song, you can't hurry love? There's a ring of truth there. A mature, healthy, strong relationship requires time to blossom and room to grow. The problem is we live in an age of instant gratification and same-day shipping. We're not used to or practiced in patience. Many of us can relate to the guilty trait of wanting something, but not wanting to put the time into it. We do the same with relationships. We rush in, then rush out when we think we see something better, shinier, and more immediate. We're suddenly treating relationships like a toy, instead of a treasure. 5. You find the effort to be too much. Speaking of immediate gratification and new toys, ever tried reading a new book or starting a new hobby and thought, why is this so difficult? Don't fret, you're normal and fine. Thank our modern conveniences for the frustration. It can be difficult to remember that a solid lasting relationship isn't instant ramen. It's a gourmet dish requiring time and care. Hitting that first relationship bump now results in scrapping it and saying thank you next, rather than working within building something with the current partner. The result of this expectation of easy makes for ingratitude to what we already have. We cheapen love and become dismissive of the good that is in front of us. These expectations set us up for a string of disappointments. 6. You're too guarded. Do you let your head rule your heart most of the time? Do you talk yourself out of the things that you want and let fears keep you from being happy? When people build too many walls around themselves, it can be hard to reach them. Being 100% clinically logical with matters of the heart may result in never truly falling in love, because sometimes love is illogical and unexplainable. Sometimes love means taking a leap of faith and opening yourself up to someone wholeheartedly. You need to put aspects like time, distance, compatibility or practicality on the back burner for a bit and allow yourself the freedom to be with whomever you want, no matter the first impression problems or complications. 7. You're too dependent on technology. Last but surely not least, being too dependent on technology might be one of the key reasons why most modern relationships don't last. Are you wondering if you rely on technology too much? Let's try a little experiment. Ask yourself how you'd feel for a full day without your phone. Seriously, from the moment you open your eyes, imagine your days step by step without your phone. Do you feel a little uneasy or that something is not right? While technology may have brought us all closer together, it's also keeping us apart. With the worldwide web at your fingertips, you can be so caught up in your virtual life that you forget to live your real one. Texts, chats and voice calls have replaced physical quality time with the ones we love and when your whole life is already chronicled in an Instagram story or a Twitter thread, it can leave us with very little to talk about. As you can see, there are a number of reasons why modern-day relationships may be struggling to survive and thrive and these are just a few of the most likely ones. We forget all too often to make time for love in our lives. Relationships are now treated as nothing more than a casual convenience. Societal influences have molded us to want immediate gratification with as many different options as possible. The truth is, love never comes easy and no great relationship happens overnight. Manage your expectations, discuss and work with your partner, spend more time on what's truly important to you and be grateful for all the people in your life who love you. Did this touch a note with you? Do you see yourself or others around you in any of these situations? If so, please share this video with someone who might benefit from it. Please like, share and subscribe. As the great Lao Tzu Wen said, being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage. Have strength and be courageous, my friends. See you next time.