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Fe wnaeth y bushlus hynny, ond mae'n meddyl i'r Lleiddofnod, mae'n meddwl i'r James Tarkovsky'r podd. Mae'r parwysau, mae'r cofnidig os yw Michael Keen. Mae'n meddwl i'r podd. Mae'n meddwl i'r hynny. David, mae'n meddwl i'n meddwl i'r hynny. I'm all right, thank you Barry, and yourself? Away from football, I'm dandy, fine and dandy. I'm of the same opinion, but Pej, you're not feeling very well today, I believe. You're a little under the weather, I'm quite the same new you. No, no, and that's what's disappointing, Dave, is that you try to hit those levels to, you know, and yes, I couldn't go for a run and today, I'll try and go later, but I'm not feeling it. And I just don't want to be, you know, dragged down. You won't be, you've got a couple of days where you're not, and then you're flying, or you're bio rhythms will pick back up tomorrow, you'll be ready. And then, you know, you will return as our little ray of sunshine on a weekly basis, because you know, you do bring sunshine into people's life, Peter, you know, and people, you know, won't feel the same without that little injection of happiness. And, you know, that's something that we all wish will come back very soon. It is, it is the injection of something I think I offer. You do it. People will have variants of that very much. Very much, I am. You'll be on the chrono or whatever else variants are out there, but you're absolutely right. Dave, let's get the depression stuff out of the way very quickly. Villa Park Sunday. It was always going to be a tough game. I'll be honest, I'm normally glass half full, but I was looking thinking we'll do well to get something out of disappoints, whatever. But it was for me, it was more the manner of the defeat rather than the defeat itself when that's an obviously losing Dominic Alvalunan and Alex Oboby as well as just side issues too. What was a very poor display in Birmingham at the weekend? It was just too easy, wasn't it? I mean, I think that's a simple fact, you know, and when you look back on it again as I have done many times and it could have been worse. You know, that score line could have been significantly worse, you know, but for some good fortune and bad missing on there, but it could have easy been six or seven, you know, that's the reality of the situation. But there was too many mistakes. It was too easy for Villa, you know, you have to think that Everton have got to be competing with the likes of Villa. I mean, I know that they always draw parallels between the two clubs, you know, very similar in terms of their history and the amount of times they've met trophies won and, you know, all these different things. And there are parallels. They are very much like us. But as they were saying on match of the day to, you know, these are two sides that are going in very different directions at the moment, you know, and that's the worry about it. And, you know, I didn't think we were going to get done in that fashion, but it was just down to what I mean. There were so many people at it at an off game, but just some awful individual errors and then heads go down and just too easy. And, you know, it just makes me wonder, therefore, where we are now two games in and, you know, it almost feels like we're in a crisis situation and we need to sort this out. It's like, well, what have they been doing for the summer? You know, I mean, that's a that's a question that you have to ask is that you could under this, you understand this kind of. You know, fatigue almost or that kind of situation, whether it be mental or physical and, you know, we need to get this right. We, you know, we need to work on this. It's a second game in, you know, we lost the first game at home, which, which, you know, granted, they created plenty of chances and they got done by it by a soft goal. But the bottom line is they still lost, right? And they were comprehensively beaten at Villa Park on Sunday. So you then ask the question of, of, you know, why? Why are they going back to basics now? What was done by way of preparation or what hasn't been taken on board? What hasn't been listened to? And, and, you know, I find that worrying. I mean, I'm trying to I'm trying to stay positive. And I'm trying to think that, you know, listen, on the. Looking with some kind of optimism, there were chances created at home against Fulham. They didn't, they didn't convert them. They didn't win, but at least there was chances created. You know, was Sunday just a bad day at the office? Was it just because obviously Villa got dumped on the opening day, you know, against Newcastle? Were they particularly good? Were we particularly bad? Were particular individual errors to blame largely? I don't know, and I don't want to press the, you know, emergency button yet. But it's difficult to find positives at this moment in time, you know, and it has to be, it has to be redressed and it has to be sorted out of the weekend because, you know, we bottom of the league, you know, and that's that's the reality of the situation, you know? And I know it's still early days, but we're bottom of the league and that has to change. And I don't really know what else to say. OK, I mean, excellent. You've said the word particular at times there as well. I mean, it feels, and it's probably stupid to say this, but it almost feels like Wolves on Saturday now is a must win. And we're two games into the season. Yeah, I mean, they got heavily beat on Saturday as well. They're home by obviously a very good side in Brighton. But I think it's just it's to me for me. It's like the mental fatigue of like last season and now this season and obviously the season before it all. Just like doesn't like it. Obviously, Dave mentioned a ray of sunshine before. There is no ray of sunshine for us. Is that it was being sarcastic, by the way? No, we were come up. What me? Oh, that's not. Whoa, listen, listen. We we we love your dower down beat tones, pet. You know, it's what what makes us tune in on a weekly basis. I thought you were being genuine then. No, you know, there's no there's no like there is no little spark or anything. Is there in people fans are. Fans are getting really despondent. You see it on social media, whether you want to use that as your gauge or not. But fans are getting really just and you wonder whether how far that will go. Like how long that will go on for. Like you saw the away end at the end. Like, you know, people just leaving in their droves. And I know of people have gone to the away games and stuff. But how long before that, you know, becomes people leaving in the droves or Gotherson or people just not even turning up at Gotherson and and just going the pub instead and and getting and I honestly believe if obviously the new stadium wasn't on the horizon, I genuinely believe we'd be getting less than 30,000 grads if the if the new stadium wasn't on the horizon. I honestly I do. I believe if that people weren't thinking well, I need to keep holding me ticket, me season ticket. I think people would start to be thinking of packing in now because it's just not fun. It's not enjoyable. Like you look at that game and you don't have that. Like, like we speak to a lot like quite a lot of people on here and from different clubs and a lot of them I've whether a lot of them are probably just as bad as others. But they have that optimism. They still go the match every week feeling like they've got hope when in a game. And you said it before, but as you're as optimistic as anybody, at times, but even you were like, this is this is one of those games that, you know, we're going to get beat. You know, I was asked before the game what score I thought was going to be. I said four nil. We're going to crumble today. And because you can just tell sometimes with our team. It's like all this stuff during the week of we played well and we missed chances and we were full of my rubbish, the rubbish. And we saw that again. We saw that on Saturday, the rubbish and we should have beaten them. And you're right. Wolves now in Sheffield United become huge games. To take the pressure off the manager. But on the flip side of that, and it's not a blessing in disguise. I wouldn't go that far. But everybody now knows that in the next week, we need players. And there's no getting away from that. And we're in a situation where it's like we can't wait till January. We need players because the fundamental lack of quality in the squad is alarming. And so we have to get those players in. Dave, I mean, I know your answer will be no, I'm not surprised. But it is nonsense, isn't it? We've needed a sense of forward for two years. You know, Dom, I don't subscribe to this. You know, I thought he was poor. Some people booming on the weekend was woeful when he went off. He was obviously suffered a bad injury. We know Neil Mopai's not the answer. It's not worked, ever need a sense of forward. Are you surprised again? Are you surprised that they haven't addressed this? I mean, I would have thought after full on, it would have been right. We need someone in this week. And it's great that Dom's coming back. That would have just been a bonus. Why are we on, you know, the time of recording? It's the middle of the week. We've got a game in three days at Gwldersen. And right now, we've got no sense of forward. It can change. We might sign someone tonight, tomorrow, whatever. But are you surprised they haven't addressed this? Cos it's embarrassing now. I think I was surprised. I was surprised, you know, eight months ago and before that 12 months ago. And here we find ourselves having the same conversation. You know, we said this time last year that we desperately needed a centre forward above all else. Yeah, yeah, right. There's no question about it above all else, yet they still seem to be looking at wingers left, right, centre. And it's like I said to you before, I've got nothing against wingers, especially I've got nothing against goal scoring wingers. It's just a question of priorities and especially it's a question of priorities, not just in the order at which you recruit, but based upon very, very limited finances. You know, if we're now not a club that can can go and effectively buy whatever we need on our shopping list, you've got to make sure that you spend that money in the most effective way. And we all know that the most head and shoulders, the most desperate thing that we need is somebody to regularly score goals, a decent centre forward. It should have happened last summer. It didn't happen. We therefore said that, well, it's got to happen in January. We all said, didn't we? We kind of said before Christmas, you watch it be like January sales. I'll have all their stuff all lined up a bit like, you know, someone's aunt going to next. She knows exactly what blouse she's going to get because she's seen it online. She's going to rush in. She's going to get that in a size 12 and she's going to get straight out the door, right? And that's exactly what should have happened and all the business should have been done early doors. And was it? No, it wasn't done at all. And here we find ourselves in exactly the same situation. So will we do something ahead of Wolves at the weekend? Who knows, Barry? You know, we desperately should do, but my optimism or positivity on that actually happening with this club is starting to really fail me. Do you know where I really struggle, right? Is that we know what we need, OK? It's a big, big wealth out there. There's lots of slikers that Evan could bring in that would shoot what the manager wants to do, OK? I keep banging on about A-core Adams. If Devon didn't have any money, he was perfect. Four and a half millions, a little bit of a gamble, but he's physical. He's aggressive. He's gone to France. He's got three in his own in two games, right? If Devon haven't got a lot of money, fine. That's that's what we're working in. Why are we throwing 25 million pound bits in for a wing of that? Do you know what I mean? If we genuinely haven't got loads of money then like you just said, Dave, prioritise it. Try and get the striker shorted. And then if you've got some you can club together some money near the end of the window. Go and sign Nick that because we all know there'll be players on Deadline Day. Everton will sign Eric Dyer or Harry McGuire on Deadline Day. We know that. And it wouldn't put it past it. We hadn't signed a wing of that and Dan James comes in on loan as well. I haven't ruled him out by the way either. Dee Dee on Deadline Day, Dyer and Dan. But we're desperate for the striker right now. Got use of Chimity. And if the manager was saying, he's flying and looking to get him involved. You know, the manager last week, he was like, he basically went, who? Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, the young lad. Oh, yeah. You know, cos you know he doesn't like young players, we know that. He could be the next Moise Keane for all we know. Moise Keane's event is going to go full on. Marko wants a second go at Moise Keane, apparently. But that's the thing that doesn't add up for me. If you've got no money till you try to sign the players on loan, if you've got no money, then like you said, Dave, surely it's priorities. There's no, I want a winger, I do. I want a right winger. Preferably, I would have liked Nontro. I didn't, I wasn't that keen on him at the start and I've done that evident thing. Now I can, I've been desperate for him, whichever its ownings do. But I'm not stupid enough to know that the bigger priority is the striker and there will be wingers available for the next week. We've already got three in the squad. Three, four, if you include Ashley Young, you can play, you know. We're desperate for a striker. That's what I can't get me into. I remember sitting here 12 months ago when we were talking about it, me and Dave basically said about Dominic Cavalloon saying we both said he was finished and we had to get it. That's a bit harsh. No, but in terms of reliability. I do believe we've been proving that. Well, I don't think he's finished, but he's not reliable, is he? OK, but I, you know, listen and to your point before Barry is that, you know, Dominic Cavalloon's dad's come out in the press and stuff like that and he said that he was disgusted by certain sections of the Travelling Everton fans booing him. And I think we all agree, you know, there's no place for that. Right now, it's not helpful in any way. You know, he sustained an injury. We've all seen it. You know, that should never happen and you can't condone that in slightest. However, he's just. He's never going to be the answer. I don't think, you know, and I think me and pet agree with this and that's nothing against him. I just don't think that over the course of a season, he's going to be the answer. He's never going to stay fit enough. He's never going to score enough goals. He's too, he's too fragile. He's a good player, but he's too fragile. And for that reason, you know, he. So that's why we should have that. We should be doing something. Of course, that was my point was that it's like the law of probabilities is he just isn't going to play. You know, what like enough games is this so ever. And I've got it for a player who's got now got less than two years left on his contract. Everon, I've got a serious start. I've got to be in the market for a player that he can trust in. And and the thing about him, while he's got two years left, why aren't they exploring the map? And I know that you have brought your meeting, but you know, you know, you're the pleasure for my buzzer players who are out there who are scoring goals. Maybe they're lesser in a lesser standard, of course, but players that you could build up over a couple of years. And I know that's what they hope to do with your meeting. But there's got to be just a little bit more creativity when we're bringing these players in. You look at other teams and I'm not saying it's what we should be doing, but you look at other teams and they, you know, they do bring in lots of players and some of them work and some of them don't. They bring them in for small fees and they seem to get a little bit of joy out of them where we continually and more like a broken record go for the same kind of player. Someone who's played in the Premier League, somebody who's been around the block, hasn't really done anything, has failed somewhere or just hasn't really done it somewhere. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but it doesn't really move the needle. It doesn't really move you forward. It keeps you exactly where you are, looking at players who have already been relegated. You never think it'd feel the team with relegated players if, you know, they got a couple more in. And I just don't quite understand why we threw all our eggs in one basket for none so I just don't get that at all. And it never felt like we were ever going to get them out of there. It never really felt... But once you knew that they didn't have they didn't have a relegation clause or whatever, and the problem never had with this. And listen, these things happen all the time. Everton have apparently walked away, Leeds are saying he won't go. It could change again, of course it could. You know, Leeds could decide later on to sell them whatever or ever and offer a bit more. But if you haven't got any assurances that that's going to happen, why are you wasting your time? And the thing with the lad is he is a bright spark and he would improve us because we don't want to have anyone who's dynamic on the phone. He is dynamic. But it's not like he's the charlison. It's not like we go, we get him in, we've got 10 goals cos he gets the lad got two in the Premier League last season. I'm not going to sleep any better between now and the weekend if he signs tonight. No, that's it, isn't it? Cos it just becomes hopeful, Dave, doesn't it? You just go, oh, hopefully he'll do this. It's not. Yeah, I mean, Ed, saying about, you know, not moving the situation forward and signing players, you've already been relegated, I get that. Does Vardy fit into that bracket for you or not? I wouldn't go near Vardy. Would you not? Because I think it's three goals last season, Dave. I just think at some point, I know what you mean. I know what you mean, Dave. I just think at some point we have to stop the behaviour that has got us to this position. Like, and I just think for me, he's that kind of play where it's diminishing returns. What would you have to offer him to get him away from Leicester and all that, the life that he, you know, the very good life that he's got, there's a matter he's playing in the Premier League, not playing in the Premier League. He's a legend there. I just think that that's the kind of one where you go, what are you going to get from him? I fully understand the idea behind it. I just love it like Vardy says. I just love us to get away from looking at that kind of sign and thinking a little bit out the box. Maybe it's too late for that. I don't know. I think I agree with you theoretically and in a long-term solution for the good of the club, of course I do, but I think I may be looking at it slightly different in terms of a short-term fix and sticking plaster on a gaping wound. And that's the way that I'm looking at it. Isn't she Adam Stath, Dave? And it's difficult to get excited about him, though, isn't it? No, no, listen, listen. You know. He's more calls than Vardy last season, but what I mean is, what I mean is, and again, you know, we'll back him if he comes in, as an Everton player, of course, you will. He is someone who can lead the line, he does battle away and he's probably a bit more like Ditesch once. It's not, again, I keep going on about Eichor Adams, there's lots of gift up and will be the one I go for. If I'm Everton now with that money, that isn't going to none, so gift or ban is the one I go after. You get him for 30 million euros, 27 million quid, I'm sure they're down payment, wasn't massive when Spares were looking at him. Would he come? Well, it's the Premier League, and if no one else is banging on your door, you'll come. He's 20 or 21. He's a hot prospect. He's got a record of putting the ball in the back of the net. Whereas we're looking and going, he gets five or four goals and he gets... We're looking at players who have played in the Premier League and have not scored goals or have stopped scoring goals. Why aren't we looking for the players on the way up? Who, you know, where's the development of these players to come in? I know it's not easy. Part of me almost feels like you've got to break... Well, not part, I think you've got to break the cycle because it's the cycle that keeps getting us back to where we are. It's that cycle that keeps us circling the drain rather than going, we're going to try something different here. The whole club just needs to stop and look around. Cos, I mean, go back to your point, Dave, it's the same, isn't it? It's like this guy will do us for this season to keep us away from the relegation. All right, well, there's one. We've been mentioned again this morning. Romelu Llyw Carcha. Not in a Chelsea. I imagine Chelsea eventually will just go, yeah, you can go on long because no-one's paying 40 million for him, or Dave-one's, would he come back to me for it? And I don't know. But Romelu Llyw Carcha, everything, would it be worth paying like 10 million for him for this season in the hope that he gets 15 goals and keeps you up? Rather than paying to him? Yeah, I sat in and said no, then I'd be lying. No, no, what I'm saying, because there's no guarantee that, of course, because he's another... Depends which Romelu Llyw Carcha you get as well, though, in terms of, do you get heavyweight Romelu Llyw Carcha or do you get kind of, you know... But is that vision still better than Jamie Vardy and still better than Tia Adams? That's what you've got to ask yourself. I don't know, it's simple. And like I said, I'm not even sure he'll come here, but what I mean is there's a lad kicking his heels who's been here before, he does score goals. Ever need somebody who can score goals? Does it suit both? I don't know. But the other thing, just before we finish on this, if it is Tia Adams, you'd have identified, right? And he's the one messing around with Salthampton on five million of fronts, and we've off a three and a half million of fronts. Just paid a blade in five million, because what if Leeds went, Everton? We've got a deal on Nonto, by the way. And Salthampton, because Everton are after both, it's not one or the other. So just paid, if it's that's the sticking point over Tia Adams, pay it, so the manager's got a forward he wants in for Saturday. Get him up here tonight, get his medical done tomorrow, training Thursday and Friday in place at the, and then we've got a striker in between, you shift your midi, we've got our centre forward, we've got Dominic Alvert-Lewin, who I think will be back for Chef United, the saying with the protective mascot. So therefore, we can then move Neil Mopai out. Who wants to go and Everton want one out as well. Rather than just kicking the can down the road, which we seem to be doing. Depression, depression. There is still, what is it? There's still nine days or something to go in the market, and I'm sure it'll be a busy time for everybody. Let's hope. Can we just start the season again on Saturday? Davey, are you in favour of the window shutting before the season starts? I think it probably makes it cleaner to be honest with you. Yeah. Cos then all this is gone, hasn't it? You've got what you've got, don't you? Yeah, you know what you're starting with is what you've got. I think it would be cleaner and easier to be honest with you, but... Di bwnt, do it. Di don if a one season and then bitched about it, or a go poppa. I'm sure next week will be better. We'll beat Walls at the weekend, by hoho, by cruch. And then maybe, maybe. I don't say that with any real confidence. I'm just, I'm planning. That's apparent, Barry. Yeah, I'm trying to be very positive. I'm trying to be very positive, but yeah, but yeah. I meant to get, we had a deal with Andy Bush. Oh yeah, we did, didn't we? Hey, we've had several deals with Andy Bush. We have had several deals. The last 12 months, to be honest with you. I'm very few of them have come to fruition. That is correct. We are, in a way, we're like, we're like Evan's recruitment team, aren't we? With where Andy Bush is concerned. We keep... Always the bridesmaid. Yeah, never. And it should have been, there should have been input from the Bush today. I believe so. I'll take responsibility for that. That's on me. I'll be the, I'll be the bad guy. Are you the Kevin Thelwell of this? I'm gonna, I'll hold me hand up and go full Thelwell here. So which means I wouldn't be speaking to a camera right now. I'd have written it down. But let's move on from that. But he is missing again in action, the Bush. And we sold it on without him. It's because he spends so much time on Facebook looking around for dolls. It is. He is a doll Facebook doll buyer, isn't he? Apparently, whatever, whatever. I don't know where you just said that. They are correcting some kind of... Yeah, put them in an order, that makes sense. If he's not DJing in Ibiza, he's buying dolls on Facebook, is that what you're saying? Yeah, or cruising with Disney? Why wouldn't you? You mean Ritchie? Given the chance. Yeah, you know. Yeah, I mean, surely they go cruising in Scotland in the fourth of faith just to fit in with Ritchie. And he could, yeah, you know, that kind of thing. Cos they look like, they look like they could do a little cruise thing together. They look good with midge nets on their heads, I think. Yeah, well, I mean, as a man who's warm on recently, Dave, you would be more qualified than us, certainly, to apply a midge net to Bush's head. Yeah, absolutely, add net to Bush. Net to Bush. I was seeing something the other day about the olden days, which led me thinking... That doesn't apply to me then, surely? No, no, no, no, I'm talking hundreds of years ago. I was sure. With Dave's, Dave's got a skateboard, tucked under his hand there. Dave's there. Fygin' full, full Marty McVitie there. Um, about... It was a thing about arguments, right? And it was like, there was a comparison thing, but just one thing I took from it was like, it was the shittest way to settle an argument years ago. Because if you had a disagreement, they'd challenge you to a duel of dawn. Now, have you only just discovered this? No, no, but it's just come back. It was just like how times have changed. Now, if I'm having an argument or a disagreement, I'm happy sometimes to just hold me hands up and go, all right, you've given a compelling argument there. We'll settle it as you've won the argument. A duel of dawn. So just because I've got a different point of view than you or Dave, and you don't agree with it, we've got to get up. I mean, there'd be no chance doing it with you because the fella that stood there, the fella will be stood there with a gun. You'd be nowhere in sight. You'd be there, honestly, for about six hours. And then suddenly, at the crack of noon, I had emerges. I take your comments and I'll disregard them. You can't, I've seen a message from you around nine this morning, which was very unpedig. I believe that while the man or lady or whatever the person identifies this is waiting for me to duel. That's a challenge you to duel. You would see me in the distance just jogging along. Jogging along in the distance. I've got to get me running first. Let me get me running. I've got to do a bit of running first. I've got to get me steps in. You've got your pistol in sight. It wouldn't be like it if it goes baggy trials just that they used to have with the white shape, with the ruffled, you know, sleeves. And you'd have, you'd be jogging along. Absolutely. Absolutely. Sounds a bit spandabale when you describe it like that. I was thinking bit of the man. But, I mean, what, yeah. Dave can't see me. Ridiculous, nothing to... Do you not think it was a bit excessive just over a disagreement? I can see it coming back. I mean, it seems to be coming back, I'll be honest. I can see it coming back just the way people are now. Yeah, I mean, you know, people in their pride and all that. Lives were way less then, you know, life expectancy was probably about 27. So what did it matter? So it didn't matter, so I'll have to speed it up. It's a natural selection, isn't it? You know, it helps to keep the population down. In some ways, it's probably better than being cancelled. Well, it's one way of being cancelled. It is one way of ultimately being cancelled, yeah. You'd feel a tip wouldn't it if you challenged someone to the duel and they just had you off once you're bang on. Those guns were rubbish, though. They were. You know, they spat out little bits of metal. You're probably, I mean, you're probably real. No, like little bits of metal. Yeah, but a date, at least. Yeah, but a date, but I don't know, is it enough? Is it like a ping? Maybe it's like a ping pong. It's like a ping pong that you ate it over the years and it didn't actually hit a kill you. They're just like, ooh, ooh. You got me, yeah. Stung you. Ooh. Like a, like red-ass with the ball, that kind of thing. That's me. I'm asking if that was a way to settle argument, like red-ass and don't, red-ass and don't. I tell you, I tell you what. Red-ass at nine for Ped. I tell you what, don't go googling that red-ass at the door and whatever. That's a proper clear history moment. Yeah, that wouldn't be good, you know, you'd need private braving on for that, wouldn't you? You know what I mean? You don't be cruising for that. No. See, but red-ass at nine has got a better sound. I can imagine that on Channel 5. Yeah. Percentur by Andy Bush. Exactly, yeah. You know, red-ass at nine. Cruising and red-ass at nine. Cruising for red-ass at nine. Is that arguably one of the shittest ways to die? That you've had a disagreement in a pub. Never a good way is that? No, there isn't a good way. No, of course, there isn't a good way. Well, it depends, but there's never a good way. But if you're just in the public house the night before and say you were discussing the modern, you know, the old version of Michael Keane and Neil Mopai, you were just having a discussion about something akin to them in the olden days, you know, which farmers better or who could grab chickens quicker or let all the chickens out, whatever, or anything. I get from Michael Keane letting all the chickens out. Well, there you go. And if you were having a deal with Neil Mopai, you might be all right. But if you, you know, match in it, and then the next minute you find yourself, me and David, be a dawnhead at nine. Yeah, yeah. I like to get up early. And there you go. You've got your run in first, Dave, with your lycra run. You'd find yourself in a, it was always misty when you're staying in like film. It's misty in the morning. You're there having to risk getting shot or like you've challenged someone the next minute you've done. Oh, what happened to Pet? Well, he had a disagreement over the chickens in real life. Well, yeah, you'd be all right, but it'd be, you could send someone else there because it's misty and get away with it. You know, just go in for us. As long as you didn't die. Yeah, but you know, but you could be in bed or send a shadowy figure going off this dawn felt, you know, because you wouldn't have to get out of bed then. But I think that would be the shit as well if you were the challenger of the duel and then you died from it. I don't have to cry. Is this been on your priority list for a while? No, it's just seen it the other day and it just started. Wait, did you see it? Why? It was just, you know, when you're looking through stupidness. No. Stupid stories and things like that. There was a thing about how arguments escalated now. Like, oh, it's a, but they were saying, but... Have you been watching horrible histories? No, but I thought it made me think about stupid deaths. Stupid deaths on horrible histories. Do you know what's been occupying my head for a little while? Go on, say it. It's kind of related to you with your fogginess. Yeah. And by that, I mean the fact that it's always foggy during those days. In the jewels, yeah. The jewels at the door, right? Yeah. Now, certain things that I don't fully understand. And I don't mind that, you know, because I'm in my late thirties now and I'm not expected to know everything. But there's certain things that still puzzle me as a man of my age, right? And one of them I've explained before is seedless grapes because I don't understand those. I've said that many times because the seed is the essence of life and how do they work without seedless grapes? That's the first one. Wi-Fi, I don't understand. I still don't really understand how Wi-Fi works. I find that like magic. But the one that actually dawned me while I was away on my North Coast 500 thing and stayed in a couple of hotels is how do those non-foggy up bathroom mirrors work, right? That you get in hotels because, you know, ordinarily you have a shower or the steam and it fogs up the thing and the only way you can clear it is with the towel, right? The traditional way. But now they have these new fangled ones whereby for some reason the mirror doesn't fog up. Now, are you aware of this concept or am I talking about a new thing? No, go on. The only thing I was aware of is if you put shaving foam on your mirror and then wipe it off, your mirror doesn't fog up for a while. That's the only... But that's like a hack, isn't it? No, this isn't a hack, yeah. Go on then. No, no, no. This is a new thing. This must be electrical, I think. Is it warm, so therefore it doesn't... I don't understand how that works either because if the mirror was warm then you've got the warm, you know... Maybe it is warm, maybe that's the thing. Cos maybe then, maybe the reason that makes it foggy is maybe it's a hot condensation hitting the cold mirror, which makes it fog up. Therefore, if you had the mirror warm, you wouldn't have the same discrepancy in temperature and therefore you wouldn't have that situation happen. That could be it, but I don't know that, but I think it's really clever. There is things, isn't it? I always go back to fax machines. I can do it's role in here and send it to me, mate. Clever, isn't it? I sort of really understand how radio works, you know, and that's been around for hundreds of years. Did you know Wi-Fi was invented by Hedy Lamar? Oh. Hedy Lamar. You must have heard of Hedy Lamar. Is he related to Thomas Lamar? He's the very famous actress in the 40s and 50s. OK, if she invented Wi-Fi. How weird is that? How did she invent Wi-Fi? No, well, tell me how she did. Well, I know she invented it, ask me. Well, that's been around for ages. So what was she doing in the 40s? If she invented it in the 40s. She invented it, right? And the Americans stole it off her and she never got a penny. That's happened with loads, though. That happened with Faraday and people like that. Knowledge bombs dropped. Nicola Tesla. Tesla or Tesla, they didn't rub off them. They rub off, yes. It's car. It's car straight away. I mean, it was cars, electric cars. Elon has developed it over time. Elon's from space anyway, you know? And I think that will play out in time. I think that will come out. I think for sure. I think he will be the first celebrity alien. I think he will be Elon Musk. But how on earth does Wi-Fi work? I mean, genuinely. Wait, he always jumps into the frequency. My friend was over the weekend from LA. Pasadena, he lives now, he's from Liverpool. But he works for NASA. He works for NASA? Yeah, he works in a jet propulsion lab in Pasadena for NASA. And he was first of all, he said, I've got a bone. I did say I would talk about this. So we said, he hasn't been over. Last time he used to come over was COVID. And the time before, he was over when I was in America. So we missed. But he said, I haven't seen it. But I have heard a couple of your things about the moon. Oh, yeah. So I did say he went the moon. I was like, well, did he? So I was said. What's his take on it? Because he's obviously a SpaceX. Well, he said he went the moon. And he said, well, he would though, wouldn't he? That's going to be NASA's line. This is what I said. This is what I said, protecting the brand. But what he said was, he said there is shadows on the moon because of whatever. It doesn't shine. I said there's no wind. And he said, no, there wasn't any wind. He said, but when you plant a flag into that surface, it vibrates for ages because it doesn't. It does not stop, it vibrates. It does not stop, so it's waving. So he gave a slightly compelling argument what about there was no jewel. Put it that way. What about the day when the Indians land on the moon? What are you going to say then? When? Today. Well, when they land on the moon today, quite clearly they've gone, haven't they? There's no one in it. It's only a ship. No, but this is what because we were getting on to. We were getting on to sending things into space and all the stuff and all this. Neil Mopay would be good. Well, Michael King. Your words, not ours, Dave. It's fine. I can say it because I'm merely a contributor. You know, this isn't an official toffee TV line. They would be the first two people in those two seats. Would they be like in an actual rocket or would you put them in the Tesla? Like memory on most sense, a Tesla in space. They just had the dummy. What's matters? What's they're asking for? He was saying obviously they're asking for people to, old people to go to Mars, aren't they? He's fuming over. It's fuming over. Like Ashley Young. It's fuming over. No, slightly older. Ffuming is probably not the right word, but he was like, well, it's a little bit pointless sending people because no one's ever going to live on Mars. No one's ever going to live on the moon. It's nonsense. It costs crazy amounts of money to send. But all the stuff we're developing, they're developing in space. Should just be robotic or not because they can still do the exact same thing. So clever. Well, I mean, I'm not an expert. I just had the conversation. I mean, you're going to have someone living on Mars, aren't you? No one's going to live on Mars. Someone will live on Mars. Nobody. I bet you. Nobody. I'll have a duel with you. We'll have a duel over it. See, I think I've got time on my side. Now you haven't said any more. No, you haven't. Because there's more probability that someone will live on the moon and live on Mars. So therefore, but I'm not giving a time. I'm just saying someone will live there. I don't know. I think they will. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I think it's a long way, isn't it? It is a long way. It's a long way. That's the thing. You know, you have to look at it. It's not an easy commute. It's a long way. There's no there's no decent infrastructure. You know, and these are all reasons to to maybe rule it out. Could you location, location, location? Do you imagine it's not a good one? Could you imagine the place of Mars bars on the service station on the way? Well, you know, property would be cheaper, wouldn't it? We don't have a bath still, do we? What do you think? What do you call? Will they have a bath on Mars? Who are they? People who've gone to. Whoever lived on. You said you said whoever lived, if they became a time, would they have a bath? Oh, remember if you know what I mean. We don't have a bath, do we? Because we're talking so far into the future. Maybe that's how they remember it. If it continues to heat up with an air bath. I think, though, that Mars bars were called Mars bars because it was the Mars family, I think, rather than being a space thing. Let me check. I don't think they were live research. This is live research. Keep going. Was there a Milky Way family or a Milky Bar family? A Milky Way, I think, is definitely named after the area of space. Hang on. So is it not in the Mars Bar family there? And Galaxy, what was that named after? The Galaxy family? I do believe it's a corporation, rather than a planet that they were named after. I mean, the beauty of this podcast being as relaxed as it is is that we are able to actually do stuff live research without even editing. No, don't worry about that, let's off. Invented in... Oh, no, that's deep fried Mars bars. No, no, no. We did discuss this the other day, cos Keith, my mate, went to university in St Andrews and he'd come over and he'd suck his kids back to say, and all that before coming to Liverpool the other day. He's ticking all the podcast boxes, isn't he? He's everywhere. He's in Paris first, then St Andrews, then Liverpool, then the Liverpool match at the weekend. But deep fried Mars bars? Like, what is that? Other than killing, yeah. I mean, is there any wonder Scotland's life expectancy is so much shorter than anywhere else? Is it, though? No, I mean, genuinely, isn't it? Can you back that up with science? Well, I can back it up with mortality, which is what me Mrs Wakes in. Life expectancy, it's like 10 years. That's some evidence. I mean, it's 100% based on evidence. It's not evidence. It's based on evidence. It's like chatting the kitchen. That's the fry in the Mars. Hey, listen, listen, listen, we have actually upholded, you know, looser theories before on this podcast. No, it's that's a thing. That's a thing the life expectancy in Scotland is shorter than anywhere else in the UK. If we date it, right? I need date it. I'm not going to do it. But no, Dave's just championing the live research, but I'm not going to do it right now. But I'm telling you, fried bloody deep fried Mars bars. No wonder on everything else. Right. Anyway, listen to me, right? The Mars bar was first manufactured in Slough, England under the Mars bar name in 1932 by Forrest Mars senior, son of American candy maker, Frank C. Mars. Right? OK. Mars bar was named after the the the the confectionary on the maker, the Mars family. All she's done, Dave, is just make your point correct what you said and I'll be honest with you. When you said it, there is science, but when you said it, when you said it, there was no elements of disbelief from me. I believed 100% because I thought that was a bit random. I'm that kind of person, though, Barry. You know, when I talk, people listen. Well, he convinced people, but he's obviously. I believe Dave because he had science to back him up. You won the other hand with your mouth. I'll tell you literally, God, I've got a science. I'm not guessing this thing. You know what I mean? He's got facts. He's got the internet. He's got Frank C. Mars. Frank C. Mars is what I mean. Mars bars, though, is there any chocolate that has stood the time as well as Mars bar? Stood the time like stood the test of time. Sorry, I'm flustered now because you've thrown science at me, right? Mars is getting to it. Stood the time. I think Mars bars are tremendous. They've got smaller. They've kept the vein on the front very much like very much, which is what was designed because it was a male who designed it with the amount of the vein, which is, well, you know, just what was a second. Yeah, because, you know, we all sort of thought we knew where you were going with the conversation. But is that actually true? Well, I mean, it's true. It's supposed to be in some way relative of something else. Yeah, I mean, I'll base my science here was on something Ben Elton said in the 80s about it. So that's where I'm listening to Ben Elton. I'm not worried about that. I'm not worried about what the snicker bars based on them. Full of nuts. Well, there you go. They suck it to the next level. They've gone, you've got the vein and you've got the nuts. They've gone all in snickers. Fans, you know, you're throwing out these vein theories willy nilly, you know, without any kind of... Nonto, nonto. Back on Big Wilfred and Wilfried. Nonto, you know, see what we've done there now. Well, name me something, a chocolate bar that has stood the test of time as well as a Mars. No, because I'm not a historian on chocolate. No, but for you yourself, I mean, something that, as a kid, it was going strong and now as a very old man, older man, older man. Sorry. Now, as an older man, it's still... It's still standing the test of time. I'm not ready for Mars yet. I won't say. I don't know. See, cos I was eating Mars, I was back in the day, I was eating a Mars bar as a kid and I still have one at the match. I'm still nice. Every weekend. Well, no, cos evidence don't have them all the time, Dave. He shall open the upper bullons. Hang on, but you could take your own, surely? No, no, no. I try to give the football club some... But you think about it, 19 games in a season, plus maybe one cup game, you could go to a cash-in-carry at the beginning and get it by a box and just put them in the fridge. But then I'd be travelling to the match with my Mars bar in me. That seems almost... That would seem almost like premeditated. I like to feel like I'm edgy on the day. I might get a bouncy today. How do you feel about an ice cream Mars? Not to the match, because it's difficult to transport. That would be difficult. But, I mean, if I was to come round to your house... Yeah, Dave, whenever you want to. OK, that's a lovely thing. And I wouldn't turn up without a gift. OK, yeah. And so I'd want to turn up with something. If I turned up with a box of ice cream Mars bar, how would that make you feel in terms of our friendship and our relationship as a whole? I'd be fine with it, but I would be slightly curious how you've managed to keep them from melting. Yeah. Because I would have what I call an eski or an ice box in the car. OK. We would protect them in terms of the transport from Lidl to your house. I will. I don't know if there's a chef. I don't know Lidl. In the gated community, bars lives in. A did they just... Can you get ice cream Mars bar as in Lidl? Yeah, you can get anything in Lidl. OK. Not called Mars bar. No, well, that's what I mean. I'd want a genuine ice cream. No, no. I wouldn't want an ice cream titan for argument's sake for an oldie. No, I'd want the Mars bar. But I'll... I'm going to wow you now, Dave. While watching season three of Deadwind last night on Netflix, which is set in Finland that the detective thing is tremendous, I did consume an ice cream Mars bar. No, there you go. There you go. I didn't like it, right? And it was very nice. Yeah, I'm with you, Dave. I'm with you. I'm with you. It's... I think the caramel is more prevalent than the ice cream. It is. Well, it's just... Do you think it's just more... It blends together. Yes, it does. Because I think it gets a little bit lost in the traditional Mars bar. Well, you've also got to have a hot drink, I think, to get the best out of a Mars bar. It's better consumed with having a cup of tea to wash it down. To dip in? Not to dip in. No, no, not necessarily to dip in, but to wash down. You see, what you've got to think of, you could never... You see, at the match, Everton could never have things like Mars bar, ice cream Mars bar. But what Everton do very well is they totally and utterly nuclear eyes. It's not a word, but I'm now saying it. Things like steak pies. I got a steak pie at Godderson. It's best going under my seat till halftime. I've done it once, I think I've said this. I can even remember the day in the game. Because, A, Everton were attacking in those days. And B, my first bite was after 25 seconds after kick-off. And at 28 seconds, I was juggling to keep it in my hands cos Romelu Llew Llew Carch, who scored. We beat Bourne at 6-3. You still saw him at the pie, yeah? Both. Right? We beat Bourne at 6-3. 6-3, and Matthew and Everton scored on 6 goals. But I stupidly took a bite on my pie, kick-off cos I thought I'm hungry here. All right, literally. I had to put it in my hand. It's a rookie mistake. I'm just holding it till about 20-3 before I could take my next bite because whatever they did, they obviously put extra heat. It just didn't go cold. Did you have a hand like no marf in Home Alone when he grabs the door? Yeah, it was literally, you could see. Sayers on your hand. It wasn't Everton, as if it'd be sayers. It used to be. It was like Fred and Ginger's pie or something. Fred and Ginger's pie. I didn't want to put any other brand out there because they're not paying us. Are they a famous dance act? Possibly. Yeah, Fred and Ginger Rogers, I think you'll find. They were from the olden days. They were from the olden days. They acted like a conversation from before. Full circle. I had to just hold it. So the only other time I bad won, it went under me, see till that shield, under me, see till half-time. And at half-time, it was sad. It's double bubble because it keeps your bottom. Warm. Well, now it's sitting on it. No, no, but just the seat. He can't get through the seat. It's got the seat. Anything could happen. Right, you've got to be careful in the upper bulands with a nuclear rise, again, that way. That doesn't exist. Red-ass at dawn again, aren't you? Well, red-ass at three. It all comes first. Red-ass at half-twelve or two o'clock or whatever time they tell us we've got to play. People think that this is just round together, Bollocks, but actually, you know, it's all carefully constructed. We know where we're going. Exactly, there's breadcrumbs and we just litter. It's like, you know, dot-to-dot when you were younger. Did you ever play that you must have done dot-to-dot? We had Nintendo. There was also... That's why you can't. That's why you're writing terrific. Never picked a pen up. But dot-to-dot, that's what it's like with this podcast. You just follow. And at the end of it, it makes a picture of Andy Bush. Yeah. We've hit all the points on it. Andy Bush. Cruising with Ritty. Absolutely. In a wig. And there we are, back full circle. Back full circle. Right, let's leave it there. I think we've covered enough topics there this week. Topics? Topics, see? It's an assortment of chocolate bars. You see? The shock of Go-Go. It is, isn't it? The shock of Go-Go, what is that? It's a nice, smashy, nicey tune. Llyma, o Thomas, Llyma. Again, back to Llyma, who invented, what did she invent? A wi-fi. She did. Did someone make it a wi-fi? Was she ever anyone's wi-fi, no? No? You don't know. Let's leave it there. Right, make sure you... Yeah, we'll be back next week, and hopefully we'll have a bit of bush. The stubble might have grown back. See you later, bye. Oh my God. Lovely stuff. Nice one, Dave. Enjoy that. Take care, mate. Take care, I'll see you later. Don't mind, see you later. Tyra, mate.