 Alrighty, welcome back everybody to the full actual podcast. Unfortunately, Marty and Michael have sadly passed away in a tragic car accident just yesterday So I will be taking over the podcast as of now. Oh Here they are Fucking around man, he's fucking joking man fucking idiots. Why? Welcome everyone episode number 21 Marty Michael, we didn't die in a car accident. We actually did not die This is the second one for the night. We already recorded one. So the um today's date is the 16th of the 7th 2019 still Still that date. No, it's a week later. Yeah, they listen to what a week later, but we're recording the same night So it's still the first day that the first ever atomic bomb went off. It's still the first day No, Matt. Why is it it's going to be the next week? You fucking dumb fucking fuck weird. It's the fucking date. It's already the 16th today We don't do them on the release date. We do them on the recording date. Really? No, I thought we changed that We've got to change that so it's more organic for the people. It's more fingers All right, so um, we don't have much of a shit talk to begin with Except um, Jackson was showing us Video footage of him sprinting and he's quite confident that he's going to do very well in the upcoming influencer races Challenger games in la set 20 27 27 27 time 100 meter sprint 10.9 10.9 seconds. Isn't that like isn't the record like nine So your prediction is you get top three in 100 meter sprint 100% confident that we get top three in the challenger games and all right on to segment two this week and it's been renamed And basically this is just where we answer fan questions Fan questions as you're fucking fine. Oh, yeah open your fucking phone. Let's read some Fucking fan questions. All right, this one's from kori kori zero six zero nine. Fuck. Yeah, kori That's kori with a k kori with a k if the world was ending and you had 15 minutes left to live What would you do? Why? I depends who I was with 15 minutes right now. I would I've got two three bottles of wine I would down All alcohol I could oh, fuck it wouldn't even hit me in that 15 minutes I'd share I'd have one last glass of wine with my fine friends. I'd just go crazy I'd break windows. I'd destroy a lot of shit But I'd rip. Yeah, I'd start by ripping the air con system down I'd smash all the windows I could kick as many holes in the door I'd run over to the neighbor's place and just grab a tits and just shake him I'll just scare this shit out of him Just scare the absolute fuck out of her for the last 15 minutes I go out with a social experiment give myself a bit of a chuckle Yeah, I'd just like fall like belly flop off the second story onto the ground in front of you guys to make you laugh I'd break your fingers. I'd snap one of my own fingers Yeah, it wouldn't matter. You just literally just fucking do what you wanted. I hope that happens. Yeah. No, no No, no, no, I don't hope that happens, but that's what we would do We would go crazy. We would destroy everything and everyone around us No, I'd get one last game One last game of crash team racing in I wouldn't let you I'd grab that fucking TV and slam it against the wall Yeah, you I'd rip all my hair out Dude, I would love watching that Oh, man Yeah, I wouldn't be a second where I was quite I'd be screaming the entire time Next question is from no one from someone but we can't read the name because it's blocked out on the screenshot Sorry good question though. Now. This is I guess this is for the little kids and shit. Why is fortnite so popular? We've only ever watched marco play it and I guess it's popular because it's like Really interactive with all the people on the internet. You can just play each other You can play friends online and that's really cool and really fun and it's like fun to like Have rankings and like try and get to like number one and be the last one standing The rules are really fun. It's not so quite funny. It's a funny little game. It's like dancing and shit. I love that What do you think? So close to hitting Yuck Yeah, I think like the whole once you die and you that's it It's gone that makes it more exciting because then your life is so much more like it's not like call of duty You die get respawned keep playing It's funner because you die and if you win a match in fortnite, it's like Such glory. Yeah, it's glory and it's such glory. You were the one that only won that match out of a hundred little Fuckers. You're the only fucking dog. Let's stand it. You didn't die once And yeah, and if you die first you have to wait like 15 minutes to play again. No, I think All right next uh question is from Why ww 29488 he is asked how old is bozzly? Great question bozzly Is six years old or 72 months always just over 72 months is 74 months old Six years old that makes him roughly oh 55 in human years. I mean dog years and um his Life expectancy for a dog his size is roughly nine to ten years old So we've got a good another three four years out of the fall and let me tell you let me tell you he's He's he's getting better with age. He gets walked every day. I reckon he'll live to 20 well longer I reckon it'll be like 15 16. Yeah, it'll be close between michael and bozzly who goes first. Fuck That's so true. All right next question again done again We just get so many messages that when you screenshot something another fucking notification comes down saying you got a new message He should have seen that though He should have seen that and then known to wait for that to go away and it's constant sometime He should have known so now this person is down on on a shout out On a shout out. That's and that's like the best thing ever. That's like more valuable than gold What it is. It's just a shout out. It's not valuable You can't put a price on shout outs. Yeah content is not Fucking shout outs. Fuck. Yeah, fuck content. Just get people to shout you out and apparently you're fucking you're set At what age did you first get your period? I was about I remember I still remember exactly when I got it I was in the laundromat with my mom. I was about 14 years old She had explored to get it. You can just put the shit straight in the no Funny you say that no they've been because all of my clothes were getting washed at the time She had just braided my hair and I had these really well done cornrows Rolling down my back and I was wearing like just laundry clothes. I just had this little crop top on and like a little skirt Yeah, I was 14 and I just remember I heard a pop and um blood just started gushing down my legs and um Yeah, one of my testicles had exploded which is a male Period. Yeah. Yeah, I was late. It was like 24. Yeah, I remember that We're out and about Michael was talking to a really overweight indonesian lady He had had like 15 beers and I just he was sitting at a table and I heard the pop and Michael Saw it but pretended not to yeah, I was embarrassed. I was very embarrassed. He didn't want her to know It's a very normal thing guys get their period all the time. You shouldn't have been embarrassed But I guess he's such a late bloomer. It is quite embarrassing. But yeah, he tried to hide it And yeah, she long story short. He um He filled her with his seed. So for those wondering if you can fuck when you're on your period males. Yes Yes, you can. There's just a lot of blood mixed in with your giz All right. Next question is from ginger underscore z underscore ninja I swear they've fucking said a question before good on them. They know their questions. Oh, this one's good What are your thoughts on Isaac Butterfield? Like he's made a hate video on me Early days, but everyone hated us when we first started everyone hates you when you're trying something new and you're not Successful yet. Everyone hated us and fair enough Michael's behavior in the early videos was very very Disgusting Isaac Butterfield made a hate video on us because Michael in one video ripped a turn out off And then in the next video ate some dog shit and actually ate dog shit And and then Isaac Butterfield, you know, he's just one of the hater guys He's a go these guys trying to copy Jackson and show me stuff like that I've watched I watched his vids the other day On he hates cyclists. He hates feminists And he hates vegans vegans. Yeah I don't like oh man freedom speech man. He's fucking he says some funny shit He has yeah, since since that he's since that day He's fucking he's a funny guy and he's he says I agree with a lot of what he says So, um Yeah, don't mind the old Butterfield. Yeah, he's a good good a good dude doing his fucking comedian thing He's got a lot of trouble and going very well. He's laid down real good guns. Yeah, check him out. All right next questions from 2791 Where'd you guys grow up? Canberra in primary school Brisbane in high school I've been a bit all over the shop Michael's injured you keep going could be that bone cancer trickling down your arm. I was born in Germany, right? three years old Parents just pluck pluck me up little German boy fluid Australian little fucking country town New South Wales. I don't even know what's cause Okay, a little farm there Then we moved around a little farm or farm here or farm there and moved to clift or clift or country town at all But Clifton, there are about a thousand people there primary school there Shortly after clifton moved to tomba early child early high school so tomba inland a bit bigger 100,000 people in there so in tomba Eight nine ten What uh after that, uh, up to the fuck I'm busy, right plate tennis, uh, hospital there come grow up, right? Uh, you know, uh, come across a mid-brisman bout. Hmm. What's that? Um, 2005 about 2004 I've been here about 14 years Half your life you've been in brisbee going same years I've been here since that skate you finally for once have got you with the bloody headphones Yeah, I've been here for my half in brisbee and half my life as well Now, uh, I don't want to panic, but um, we don't have a run sheet in front of us But I think the next segment has been renamed. I remember matt telling me beforehand and he, uh, wanted to call it something new and exciting He wanted to call it far And basically this is a segment where we just re tell a story We just tell a story something crazy that's happened to us in our life Could like just something wild, you know, like back in our like hey days when we Can't be proud of this one. No, no, I love this story. This one is from the heart This one is it's a story of just survival. It's a story of just bringing people together and just everyone Just helping each other out You know what I mean though, you know what I mean? It's a story about like everyone just coming together and everyone's In it for the right reasons and everyone's just Without wanting anything in return, right? Everyone's just helping each other and doing it for the right reasons. Don't you think? Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't you fucking think positive message This is a story how we used to go around to parties and just fucking destroy houses We used to go around when we were fucking like 18 to probably early 20s and just Fucking destroy The houses that we were partying at we had yeah, they were called destruction tours Oh man, we had a lot of fucked up friends. We were very chaotic. We chaos So we'll give you we'll give you some examples, right? So and even before 18, this is like when we started drinking Yeah, high school So we we you know someone to have a house party A friend of a friend usually or even sometimes friends Bad idea even sometimes friends that we knew people we knew would have parties and we would go there And when we started drinking we'd get so fucking destructive because we thought it was hilarious We would do some fucked up Shit, I remember going through a room once and just breaking every fucking thing I could in the room all through the drawers snapping shit I remember like didn't it's just like putting it back in And they never knew it was me. We had a friend Matthew. Yo from Toowoomba And he would he would often host these house parties in high school Without consent. He said no no one's coming over no one's coming over tonight No one is partying and we would just say yes, we are and we would we'd a whole bunch of us would just show up at his house And then we would Drink in the memory his memorabilia room like his dad's prized mem sporting memorabilia everywhere And we would fucking fuck that place up back We've said this previously about this house before this is where they did initiation for me when I was like 16 Peace everywhere. I was like they had an egg fight in that pool room Yeah, an egg fight in the pool room and there's just eggs everywhere No one would ever piss in the toilet and then and then that's that's when the worst The worst habit started and goes house and I don't even know if he knows this But we used to we get get everyone would be like half asleep Usually be one of the last ones awake. We'd open his family fridge And starting at the top level we'd start pissing and just piss through his entire fridge Fill up with piss and we take it in turns. We just fucking drench everything in urine in the fridge And then we'd go to bed thinking it was hilarious and then in the morning the parents are like, oh, do you guys want breakfast? No, no, thank you. No, we don't want to touch your fucking food. It's got a piss on it and we'd sit there Fighting back laughter watching the family and our fellow friends eat our piss Saturated food. We were hungry too. And man, yo's parents were so angry always the next day But we always knew the one thing to fix him All I would do is write a really lovely apology letter and give it to him and then they'd be fine All I ever wanted was an apology But we moved houses and he had a party at his new house and they had this like really expensive new bar Where it was like it was fine finished wood and mighty just couldn't find a bottle opener So he just starts hacking into the side of the bar Chipping away at it trying to get this bottle cap off his bottle and he by the end of the night All the edges of the bar was it was just chipped away and fucked. Yeah, we fucked so many houses Do you remember that night when everyone went to bed? And like accidentally threw the glass really hard, but then let go and it shattered everywhere We thought we'd woke the house up. Yeah, and then we just left it went to bed quickly This is a thousand shards of glass all over the bar like not the bathroom the living room floor friends with pools Bad idea. We don't fill the pool with just furniture Dude one of my my house had a pool and they used to piss it like you'd piss like instead of going on a toy You just piss in the pool fair enough. That's fine But they Marty and Henry another friend would pop their beer bottles like in the lids I'll just find them on the ground not even throw them in the pool throw them in the pool Next minute the next day the clean the fucking what do you call them creepy crawly has sucked up all the beer bottle caps And that cost my family $2,000 to buy a new creepy crawly. We did that just for a cheek Laugh, but it got really bad. Yeah one one story. That's really sick in my mind This is a house party in in nearer university. We're a big group of friends I can't even remember all the boys that were there, but there's a big group of us So and whenever there's a big group of us we all want to you know show off to each other and just really just take it to the next level So it started in a room or smashing Mirrors, I can't remember that was like there was a couple of mirrors there that just got shattered and Before long we didn't even know the person having the party. It was just a friend of a friend like a hundred people there And anyway long story short. We were asked to leave pretty pretty quickly So we this this property is at the bottom of this fucking steep hill like a 45 degree angle hill And it's pitch black. It's so dark So you walk up like a hundred meters or not a hundred maybe 50 meters up a hill Really steep incline and that's when you get to the street And on the street was a big industrial sized bin on wheels And everyone's partying at the property underneath and it's pitch black So they can't see us at the top and we can barely see them We can just see some light and we can just hear the music and hear everyone talking and laughing And then all of us we just get the bin and just fucking Launch it down the hill and then like and then we just leg it We don't stop to watch the carnage or hear anything We just fucking run and as we're running away piecing ourselves laughing We hear because that would have heard the bin coming but not been able to see it because it's pitch black It's been just flying down a hill Picking up speed and then we hear this fucking like people screaming chicks screaming their fucking heads off Hear this huge bang explosion and we will fucking like we were already like a hundred meters down the road And we did not turn around to see the damage We someone could have died. We could have killed someone I hope we just didn't admit to like fucking dude imagine if they couldn't find the people that got hit by a bin Like 12 years ago. If anyone if anyone was hit by that bin. This is a joke. It's not a real story But to everyone else listening. Yeah, I know fucking hilarious But our our fucking our ways have changed since we don't we don't science now It's all science. We just work hard And also we don't go I think if we went to a party and we didn't know the person Then we'd probably still maybe being inclined to be a bit destructive But now all the house players we go to are like close friends, you know, you don't really want to fuck with your close friends, right? Yeah, so yeah, that's that's just something a sage that we went through we learnt from it We're not saying go out and act like this. We're saying we've done it So learn from it laugh at our story now. You don't have to do it. Yeah So we're teaching we're teaching and if yeah kids don't do it only if you're above 18 as I always say Fuck man. That is a fuck story to tell the world. That's more fucked I feel more guilty at that than telling the world that I ate my own shit. Oh, this segment's called Kale And in this Kale segment, we basically just read news headlines and comment on the Matthew Brown from wholesome comes up with our news with our With our segment names. So if you have any suggestions for segment names email wholesome Or comment down below so we build our comments up in mighty Michael fully actual because that's important engagement Forgot about that youtube channel man. If you are fucking watching from the youtube, don't forget to subscribe at the top push that fucking bell Push that bell button put a bell button He say it puts that bell button enough push notifications. Push notifications. Don't forget to drop a fucking comment in the Bottom bit and then subscribe to the youtube channel the best thing in the what coming at you live out of brisman I just thought of a new thing we should do in each podcast Ask them a question And then they'll comment it below and then we'll mention next week the best answer Holy shit. What's the question everyone? Have you ever been fucked harder than you have wanted? Oh, I guess okay. That's all right. Yeah. Yeah, that's fair Really? I don't know. Maybe we can think of something better What's your name and then we'll pick the best name Fuck we got to think of more questions next week. We'll think of a better question But what's your name and underneath if you feel like it? Have you ever been fucked harder than you wanted a question? The question is what's a good question and then next week We'll say the best question and that will be the question. Oh my god. Fuck it. How it is Science to the max. Holy shit. God. I'm hard man First story is from metro news And they have said rufa ends up in hospital after swallowing one One pound coin in bizarre party trick. Dude. I've done this. What a fucking loser dude. I've done a five cent coin And I was fine Remember at school year 12 who the fuck gets a fucking dollar coin stuck in there fucking throw your pussy bitch Swallow it is get it down. All right. The next story is from a support to the guardian. It's from the guardian Australian man screaming at spider. Why don't you die? Triggers full police response Oh god Spider wanting it to die And the neighbors must have heard and been like fuck. He's killing someone I'm doing the fucking neighbors here. So be careful what you scream at things that you're killing Because you don't know who's listening would you be careful what you scream out for fucking neighbors, man A police of car just drove into our carpark. I'm now worried that it's the police because the Fat neighbor heard me saying how to shake her tits Yeah from the previous book us Anyway, hopefully that's not a cop. Oh, no, it's fiona. We're all good Imagine if she came in with a badge and she was undercover. Oh, we'd be screwed I would be mainly next story is from two Florida man punches woman at publics because she gave him the middle finger a cape coral man and retired police officer Was arrested after a minute to punching woman Oh my god Oh my god, I wonder apparently it's legal now to flip off cops. That's good that they changed that law You shouldn't ever punch anyone unless they of course. Yeah, give you the middle finger. So We're not sexist I'll fucking hit any cunt steps up to me cunt Any fucking dog comes in he fucking looking for fucking trouble come on cunt knock on my fucking door dog I'll fucking drop you man woman child fucking camel cunt. I can rock up cunt Rock up. Come on. Bring your fucking boys around. I'll fucking knock that door on. I'm fucking knocking you clean out Blah Shit and that is the end of the news that segment. Um, this one is a segment. Uh, well, let me read the title first And this is basically just a prank call and for this week's prank call I'm going to pretend to have a severe stutter. Oh, you can't do that There are people in the world who have stutters. Yes That's true when I'm making fun of them We're just pretending to be one while ordering food if you laugh That's all new man If you get offended because you know someone with a stutter just fucking relax It's just a fucking joke. I've taken it so personally if I had a stutter I'd be totally fine people making fun of me. That's fucking if I said, hey Carl from next door has a stutter. I'm going to pretend to be Carl That's offensive because I'm personally attacking someone I'm just making a generalization about stutters themselves. I've got no one in mind I'm not thinking of one person while I do this. I don't know anyone with a stutter. So fucking calm down. All right I'm going to pretend to have a stutter It's really good. Really good at it. Um, let's not call dominoes because we've just called them We'll do a pizza hut Hello Hello, can I please Place a pick up order, please. Yeah, can I get four four pizzas, please can for the first for the first one? Can I just can Barbecue meat barbecue meat lovers, please Yeah Classic classic crust there For the second piece, can I can I please get Hawaiian pizza, please And that one's on thick crust, please Yes For for the third pizza, but Can I can I just get a barbecue chicken, please? Yes What what sides what sides do you have? Sides Can I get the Garlic bread, please Yeah, two two two garlic breads, please For the drink drink, can I get Pepsi, please For the Yes for for the for the bub bub bub bub for the meat lovers What can I can I A swirl of hollandaise sauce, please Mm Yes Dessert He's become a rapper at the end I was hoping you'd start doing like I like real big out there. Yeah, damn it. Oh my god, dude. We'll have to do that one again Oh man, oh yeah, well at least when we sort of start to run out of disabilities to do We can just really like go fucking through them again I just get nervous towards the end because I don't want them to actually process the order Yeah, fuck them dude. They make millions. I don't I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings No, we're talking about the company not the person. Yeah, I just don't want to hurt anyone's feelings I don't want to have to have to them lose their money. I'm not about that. Yeah, you'd never ever hurt anyone's feelings I'm not about that because we're the best We're the best We are the best