 Stand by for crime. I'm Chuck Morgan newscaster and radio station KOP here in Los Angeles You know being a newscaster with two shows daily you sometimes have to scratch around to dig up a yarn That's different from the run of the mill stuff Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how you care to look at it I came up with a couple of jackpot stories a while ago and now my listeners expect me to do it at least once a week That's why when one day last month. I had nothing very exciting on the fire. I was beginning to feel a bit desperate That's why also when the phone rang and a mysterious voice said that if I'd come to a certain address He give me a story that would jack up my Hooper rating at least five points. I decided to go Even though the address was 35 miles away in the Elizabeth Lake region So Carol Curtis my blonde secretary and I climbed into the old Jalopy and headed north along Highway 99 Well climb up first, how do you like this country? I like it See I had no idea there was such lushness so close to LA. Yeah, there's a lot more now that you're here Oh, you're just saying that because I know just because I met it. Oh You're a cute Jackie boy Gosh look down there in that Canyon There's a creek with real honest to goodness water in it. Sure. That's a Elizabeth Lake Canyon Creek runs a year round Which is unusual for Southern, California. Oh, how do you know it runs the year round? Oh gonna appear before Doing what? Just riding around. Oh, I see Who was with you? I was but Glamour push your jealous. I am not Who was with you? No, buddy, I came up to get some material on that Elizabeth Lake monster story. Oh, oh sure I remember it was that yarn about the monster that used to rise up out of the lake and frightened the Indians in the old days Mm-hmm. Is that where we're going now? Yeah, we're almost at where we're going now if the directions they miss bugs to Give me a correct. Just who is this Amos bugs be anyhow? That's what we're up here to find out Well, don't you know anything about him what he does or what he looks like or why he phone instead of coming in or anything Yeah, all I know is he said he had a hot story and if I wanted it to come on up and give it to me Oh, he sounds like one of those crackpots to me. Let's hope so makes a trip more interesting Well, there's the cliff What cliff that cliff with the niche in it bugs be said the road to his place turned off to the last just before We got to it. Yeah, there it is Gosh, it doesn't look as though a car had been here it for years. I hoped we'd find something like this. Why more chance of a good story There's the cabin. It's just a shack hidden away in the bushes. It's deserted to Well, let's get up Wait a minute Chuck. What's matter? It isn't asserted. There's a well. There's a rifle barrel sticking out of that window Yeah, and a man behind it The climber plus he's gonna shoot that rifle baller came too close for comfort. I Began to think that this bugs be was not only a crackpot But one of those crackpots about whom I'd broadcast something at one time and now he'd bated me into a trap to get his revenge Anyway, we were ducks and a barrel sitting out in the open with no chance of a getaway I was estimating the chances of reaching the comparative safety of the heavy undergrowth when the door of the house open And a man carrying a rifle stepped out He was the ugliest man I'd ever seen Besides normally twisted features. He had a ragged scar running from the corner of his mouth to his right ear We're not arguing that my friend, what's the idea of using us for target practice? Are you Chuck Morgan? That's right. Let's see your driver's license. I showed him my driver's license His whole attitude changed at once. He apologized for shooting over our heads And explained that his own life was in danger and he couldn't take any chances with strangers Well, we got out of the car and followed him to his shack Sit over there miss Curtis. I think you'll find it comfortable. Thank you. Look, this is all very fine Yes, I know mr. Morgan. I don't blame it for being annoyed, but Every minute of every day my life is in danger Well, I haven't slept for more than two hours at a time for weeks I don't dare step outside this cabin in the daylight. Well, what's it all about mr. Bugsby? Yeah, he said you have a story for me What is it? I have mr. Morgan and when I finished it I think you'd agree that your trip up here was worthwhile shoot, so I better begin at the beginning as you can see Yeah, I'm a very ugly man and that means I'm a lonely man Loneliness is just about the hardest burden a man could have to bear and that's why I answered the ad in the newspapers And don't tell me you joined one of those lonely hearts clubs I understand your contempt mr. Morgan And I hope and I've told you the rest of my story you'll change your attitude. I Did more than join a lonely hearts club I replied to an ad which stated that a young widow desired correspondence with a middle-aged gentleman who lived in the country My home is in Lancaster. I have a wheat ranch there. Well, we corresponded and eventually Helen Helen Cutler her name is asked me to visit her to home in Santa Monica. I accepted but with a certain amount of Yes, are you mrs. Cutler? Yes, I am I'm Amos Bugsby Amos Bugsby after all these weeks. Oh, this is exciting. Please come in Hey, then you're not disappointed disappointed. Why would a strange thing to say? Why should I be? Well, that is my look nonsense I'd be a fine one if I were just interested in a man because of his looks now, wouldn't I? You just sit down here and make yourself comfortable. We've a great deal to talk about. Yes, we have Helen You know, I was really worried about well about letting you see me It was foolish of me one night. I certainly was Oh, come in Bob. I want you to meet Amos Bugsby. Amos, this is my brother Bob Oh, how'd you do Bob? How'd you do? What'd you say the name was? Yeah, Bugsby Amos Bugsby Bugsby Helen, is this the man you've been telling me about? Yes I've been urging him to come and see me for weeks, but up to now he's been afraid I wouldn't like his looks when I was looks are unimportant. There are the things that are remember that Helen See you later. Oh dear. Well, what's wrong? Did I do something to offend your brother? What'd I do? Oh, it isn't that and Bob didn't intend to be rude. It's just that Well, since my late husband died Bob has been taking care of me. We aren't very well off and He's so afraid I'll marry some man who well who hasn't the means. Oh, he needn't worry about that as far as I'm concerned Oh my no, really? Yes indeed. I have a wheat ranch, you know, it's a big one too when I've saved my money I'm a rich man. I guess I'm worth nearly a half million dollars. Oh, Amos, that's wonderful I can well afford to support a wife. Yes, I can You're embarrassing me, Amos. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't intend to appear forward You're not angry. Of course not. And you will let me call again. Well, of course I want you to call just as often as you can Can't be too often to suit me Well, that's the way it started mr. Morgan exactly as I have told you but didn't you become suspicious it seems to me that Both those people were pretty obvious about their intentions suspicious Yes, I suppose I was in fact, I'm sure that well then why in the world didn't you miss Curtis? Do you know what it really means to be lonesome? Oh, yes, I suppose I do There have been times you know what it means to wake up every morning of your life and know that you have to face each day Completely alone that among all the people you'll meet There's not a single soul who cares and there's no one to do little things for you or for whom you can do little things That when night comes you you'll go to bed in an empty house and you lie awake there Longing for the sound of a friendly voice of the touch of a loving hand Well, that's the way it's been all my life. Miss Curtis I've never been without an ache in my heart and a long. Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, no, no, no, that's all right I I just want you to know why close my eyes to those suspicions Why only saw and heard the things I wanted to see in here. Oh Yes, yes, I knew but But the happiness I experienced during the two weeks before Helen and I were married Was worth every moment of the misery and the fear that followed then you were married. Oh, yes We were married. Yes indeed. We were married by a justice of the peace and after the ceremony We stopped by Helen's home so she could pick up some things before start Well, here we are my dear you run in and get your suitcase and then we'll drive directly to the airport I got the plane tickets right here in my pocket. Come on in with me. Yes, of course Yeah, I'll buy a little kiss nuts come on inside I'm sorry my dear. Oh, well, there's time enough for that later. Yeah time enough for that later Yeah, here we are now you hurry along don't be too long. I Have an impatient husband, you know Well the newlywed then so you got him a Helen. Yeah, I got him everything ready everything just dandy. Okay stupid get in here What's that? You talking to me? But what do you mean in here? Look monkey face don't ask questions. Just do like you told What's meaningless just do like my brother says darling and you'll find out but I don't understand Why are you pointing that gun at me Bob? Oh, you'll know I mean business Are you gonna do like I say or do you want it right here? Well, doesn't he understand that I'm your husband that you're in love with me in love with you Are you kidding? Who could fall in love with a mug like that? But darling darling me Look not head. Let's face it. You fell for a sucker game and now you're gonna pay off Do you mean that you don't love me that you that you think I'm ugly ugly Well, you don't even look like a human being You think I'd fall in love with a clumsy oaf like yourself. You're crazy, but you did fall in love with me You married me. You're my wife. I won't be for long What do you mean by that? Just what you're thinking old man right now? I'm your wife Teminism now I'll be your widow and heiress to half a million dollars Helen you can't mean that where you wouldn't all right lover boy cut out the subs tough and get in here No, no, no, you can't why not in cold blood. Well, give me a chance. I'll pay you if that's what you want Oh, hey, who's that? How should I know we can't ignore it as cars out front? Take care of them. I'll answer it Okay, lover boy. This won't fix you What happened after that? I woke up on the floor of an adjoining room. I heard voices in the next room They were some talk of overdue rent and I didn't wait to hear anymore. I got out of there as fast as I couldn't And then what did you do? Well, I didn't dare go home. I knew they'd be after me I was so confused and disillusioned. I spent the night alone in the motel Why did you go to the police? I thought of that the next morning and then I read in the papers that Helen beat me to it Beat you to it. Yes. Yes, Helen was very clever She told the police that I admired her and then deserted her so now the police are looking for me, too Helen and her alleged brother aren't clever all right Even if you did go to the police, what kind of a case did you have? The record show you were married You have no proof other than your own word that she and her brother had threatened to murder you On the other hand, you'd run away. That's it. Mr. Morgan. That's it exactly. Yeah, but until I'm dead Helen cannot inherit my estate and that's why I'm hiding out here That's why every minute of every day. I live in fear for my life. Yeah, this is circle On the other hand Helen and her brother won't leave town until they do locate you And in order to exist they've got to continue with their lousy business. What do you mean by that Chuck? I mean, I know something about this racket Helen and her brother move from city to city working on people like Amos This is probably the most important job they've ever run a foul of So they'll stay here until they find Amos working the same gag only under different names and what are you going to do about it? I'm gonna watch for the next newspaper ad to appear Then I'm going to answer it and marry Helen myself There are more than 300 marriage bureaus and lonely hearts clubs that adopt this broad land of ours Some are on the level and some aren't Those that aren't the vast majority stop at merely fleecing the poor and suspecting victims of their life savings And then there are those like the one that sold Amos Bugsby down the river that go in for a cold-blooded murder Well Carol and I left Amos in his mountain hide out and go back to town I'd made him a promise and intended keeping it, but it was gonna take a lot of doing I Had a talk with Papy Mansfield owner of KLP and Two days later an ad appeared in the papers that could have been inserted by the same gal who trapped Bugsby This time her name was Mary Hayden. She was living in Pasadena She was still a young widow who wanted to enter into correspondence with someone living in the country I answered the ad got a fast reply And for two weeks we kept up the hottest correspondence you ever read Then came the inevitable invitation to visit her So on a Thursday morning, I drove out to the address she'd given me in Pasadena It was a small frame house set in amongst the pepper trees The girl who answered my ring fitted the description of the woman Bugsby had married perfectly Are you Mrs. Hayden? Yes, I am. Well, I'm Jim Sawyer Jim Well, this is a surprise Pleasant surprise won't you come in? Thank you It's a pleasant surprise for me too, Mary You don't mind my calling you Mary. Oh, not at all Jim Why is it a pleasant surprise for you? Well, I Hardly expected to find so attractive of a girl being lonely. Well, it's because of my brother Ray Since my late husband died he's been taking care of me. We haven't much money and Ray is very particular with whom I associate especially men. I see but Tell me about yourself Jim You hardly look to me like a fit character for a lonely existence Well, since I told you in my letters I work for an oil company and spend most of my time in the field Never any women around and when your boss have a crew you don't get to know your men very well I understand perfectly. Oh, here's Ray Ray. This is Jim Sawyer. Jim. This is my brother Ray. Hello, Ray What did you say the name was Sawyer Jim Sawyer Sawyer Ray Mary is this the man you've been telling me about? Yes, isn't he attractive? I knew he would be You wrote such nice letters his looks are unimportant. Well, there are other things that are remember that Mary See you later Dear what's the matter with him? Did I say something wrong? Oh, it isn't that right and intend to be rude. It's just it Well, he's so afraid. I'll marry some man who hasn't the means. Oh He needn't worry about that as far as I'm concerned. I said I was in oil I met I had shares in several wells my income runs around 50,000 a year You think that it satisfy your brother? Oh Wonderful, I didn't mean to be proud. I didn't mean to be proposed and married at this early stage You you will let me call again. Won't you? Well, I should be disappointed if you don't come as often as you like You'll always be welcome The whole thing was following the Amos bugs be patterned perfectly that pair read their lines without a fluff Ray had entered on cue the entire act was running a smooth lazy oil on my alleged wells During the next 10 days, I saw a lot of Mary we did the town and in spite of myself. I had a pretty good time Especially since every tab I picked up was on Pappy Mansfield. I Was glad the Carol Curtis wasn't around to witness some of our cozy rendezvous. She'd have blown her top As a matter of fact she came pretty close to doing just that when I told her the date was set for Marys in my wedding from where I sit Mr. Morgan marrying this female is entirely unnecessary to the success of your nutty idea and from where I sit Miss Curtis marrying This female is entirely necessary to the success of my plan Why because she's already married to Amos bugs be remember if we can't get her anything else We can charge you with being a bigamist. Well, I still don't see why trying to see I'm going through with it I've worked for a month on this story, and I'm not going to junk it just because some dumb blondes I'm sorry glamour plus Chuck. Please don't do it. I'm worried about what? Well, well, what if they decide not to murder you until after the honeymoon decide not to murder I went through with it. All right, only it didn't turn out as I planned Something happened I headed countered on something that very nearly threw me for a loss The MS bugs be patterned held through the ceremony which was performed by justice of peace So when we started back to Mary's place to pick up her things it changed Mary didn't say two words until we stopped in front of the house, and she just sat there Well, what's matters with her? You don't look very happy. I'm not I think you get over it lots of brides are unhappy the first couple of hours. Come on now get your things and we'll get Oh, Jim. No, I don't want you to go in there. Why not? I want to say goodbye to Ray Ray isn't home He had to leave town this morning on business Look, I'm not gonna let you carry those heavy suitcase heavy. I can manage them. All right. You stay here and wait for me I'll be right back I sat there a minute or two trying to figure this one out Then I saw a car pull up to the opposite curb Do makes and happy Mansfield are inside. I sat there watching me Well, this was it. I Signaled them to go down back of the house got out of the car And started up the walk To timing little chiseler. You think that's going to make any difference. I mean your cat What's going on here? Well, if it ain't the brand-new groom all in a sweat to get started on his honeymoon Stand over there jerk, but down that gun ray it might go off and hurt someone Well, now that's just what it's going to do when you're going to be on the receiving end punk And my name ain't Ray. It's Bob before that was Joe before that was Charlie Shut up you little tramp. I don't care whether you're falling in love with a square or not I mean just another sucker walking while little trap I'm gonna knock him off and you're going to inherit his dough and split it with me just like we always done Please Ray, please. He's my husband I'm in love with him. I didn't think it would ever happen to me, but it has It's the first decent feeling I've ever had. I don't want him to die Why you don't listen to me Ray? Mary in a way, I'm glad this happened now. You know how the others felt they had good clean decent feelings, too Men like Amos bugs in this bug Who the devil are you not the man you think Ray? I'm Chuck Morgan newscaster and radio station KLT news get married. Did you hear that? I'm sorry Mary. I'm not your husband not while Amos bugs being a few others are alive and you don't love me I Dispise you marry for a cheat and a murderous None of them were anywhere near as bad as the things you said or did to men like bugs be You know good Mary Instead of winding up in a honeymoon you're going to wind up in a gas chamber Well, listen to that will you wind up in a gas chamber and just how do you think you're going to pull that one out of the head? You know if you've got an idea you're gonna walk out of here without a hole in your head your nuts I'm not all together a fool Bob. Listen You hear that that's a police coming in the rear door the minute I give the signal they're becoming in the front door, too Are you? Not before I take care of you. They won't Mary stand back it out of the way No, you're not going to shoot him. I don't care what happens to me. I love him Way, I said no, I don't care what happens to me. You're not going to Happy and Bill Megs didn't arrive any too soon As far as Mary or hell. I know whatever her name was is concerned. They arrived too late Bob's bullet caught a squarely between the eyes killing her instantly It's probably just as well Her fate would have been the gas chamber as it will be the fate of Bob her alleged brother Bill Megs was on Bob like a leech the second after he pulled the trigger. It was an easy matter to subdue him That's the way things go People who think they can get away with any kind of racket usually wind up behind the eight ball As famous Bugsby is back in his wheat ranch a wiser and happier man He's no longer interested in romance Which is a decision I almost reached myself when I asked Carol Curtis and Papi to have dinner with me that evening Nope, I never go out with married man. It's against my principle listen to her against her principles. Listen birdbrain I'm not a married man. My wife died this afternoon. She was shot to death. Oh That's so isn't it. Well, I don't go out with widow is either. That's against my principles, too How do you like that Papi? What would you do with a babe who had so many principles? I'm not a babe Well, I'll tell you what I do Chuck you remember that red-headed niece of mine I told you was coming down from San Francisco for a visit what red-headed me. She's 22 years old and a real knock. Oh, yeah Yeah, I was thinking Chuck if I bought the tickets you know What oh, but Carol if you no longer want to happy man's failure deserted me Oh, I hate you. I didn't know you had a red-headed niece who was good-looking