 Good evening and thank you for joining us on Y254 News Updates and tonight we talk about men who are taking lead in making sure that the voices of the girls are heard. We also try to talk about how do we create a balance between making sure that we empower the girls and not forget the boys and also passing a message and motivating men to also come up and that is fight for girls right, it also fight for the boys right because you don't want to be at a position whereby one group is fused left out and to help us tackle this topic tonight we have Gideon Makumi who is the vice president of the Youth Mentorship Foundation and also the chairman of Future Now Mentorship. We also have Tom Hayzak who is the coordinator of welfare for children and youth in Kenya and these people are going to help us understand. These are men who are taking lead in making sure that both the boys and the girls' voices are heard in terms of making sure that they are fighting for the rights of these children making sure that every person is heard based on whatever challenge that every child or every young person in this country is going through. You can be part of this conversation tonight by sharing your views on our social media platforms that is on Y254 channel, hashtag Y254 news. You can also talk to me at Patricia Muriukiwan on Twitter. Thank you very much for joining us. Thank you guys for coming today. Welcome to Y254. Thank you. We have seen a lot of achievements so far on the girl child. We have seen now the girls can assess education. We have seen a lot of changes as far as FGM is concerned. We have seen changes in terms of earlier marriages and all that. But there is always a fight that we have pushed the girls very much and forgotten the boys and tonight I would like us to really talk about these and try to see how do we now make sure that people don't left out. But before we start, I would like to start with you Tom. Would you kindly tell us why did you choose to be part, to serve under the, to be the coordinator of the welfare of the children and the youth in Kenya? Thank you. May we just be simple. First of all, there is the wide welfare. Welfare simply means betterment for all. And why the gas program. We realized that some time back we did a research in 2009 and realized that as alias from age nine, most girls were dropping out of school, were not being involved in other communal activities. The fact being is most of them were undergoing through the teenage and adolescent crisis and the puberty changes. So they could not understand themselves why are they different from the boys. Now these make more girls to withdraw from the society, even from the criminal activities. And we felt, why don't we start an association or an organization where we can try to bring girls on board for them to feel that they are equal to boys. And that was the inception where we started a program by the name Girls Reach Out. We started by around six girls, where we gathered in a certain village within Nairobi that's in Kamukuncha place called Kiambio. And we got a response from not only the seven girls we targeted, but we got an overwhelming number of more than 900 girls. So we realized that the challenges girls are facing, one is inadequate of appropriate and relevant information, especially on reproductive health. Number two, they lacked that platform to express themselves. And number three, they felt like they are discriminated from other activities where boys were being involved. And we thought if we start that, we can be able to give a girl child a voice and be at par with the boy child. Okay. As for you, Gijon, I also understand that you are a human resource with Bethel Network, which is an organization that prioritizes on making sure that girls can assess sanitary troubles. Why did you choose to do that? Because honestly speaking would say you are a man, you don't have to go through the menstruation period. So why choose to take that path? Thank you, Patricia. When you look at the girl child, there are so many challenges that they go through. And one of the major challenges that girls face is the issue of the pads. And menstruation for a long time has kept girls out of school, where you find on average in a month a girl would miss three to four days out of school because they cannot afford sanitary towels. So what you are doing at Bethel Network, is ensuring that every girl stays in school. In fact, the program is called Always Keeping Girls in School. And ensuring that this girl gets a chance when even the boys are in school and those who can afford are in school, she can as well get that chance. So why choose to be part of that is because these girls, we target the very vulnerable and those in the very needy places. It's because these are our sisters. These are people that if given a chance to remain in school, they stand a chance to succeed in the future because they are future education. We say education is not everything, but it is something. And these girls need that education for them to have brighter futures. So that's why as a youth mentor, I choose to join that path of empowering the girls. So most of the times when we are talking about problems that are faced by both the boys and the girls, I feel like we have a good definition of what the girls go through. Lack of sanitary towels, early marriages, FGM and what have you. What are the challenges that the boys now go through? Because we are trying to create a platform whereby we are creating a space which is very inclusive that a boy will come and feel the same help or the same impact that a girl has come and felt. So what do you think are some of the challenges that boys in this country go through that people have assumed? That's very key. One is an assumption that a boy child does not face any difficulty. That's a very big assumption. That's challenge number one. A misconception in the community that a boy child does not undergo all these challenges. So misconception is challenge number one. Challenge number two, where boys are told that you should not bring out your real feelings, I mean emotions. I don't know what to say and you are passing through tough time. It's a challenge. Number three is lack of proper mentorship. When I talk about proper mentorship, I'll give an example of the girl child program. You find you take girls, take them through a mentor who is able to walk with them through that teenage period. But the boys, you realize that the lack sample that will take them through that teenage adolescent stage that can walk with them all through and that way you realize most of the boys that they get to 19 or 20 most of them they are not much emotionally. They are thinking that their digital making skills is not that stable in a way that he's not even able to make decision for himself. So they've also lack role models in their lives. They are also lacking appropriate information and the right choices that can guide them to the right path and the right career. Okay. Gidzhenyavad, what Thomas talked about the misconceptions that are there in the society. We expect we are building men, we are telling you have to be strong. You cannot speak about the pain. You cannot show you cannot cry. Maybe sometimes when you have to when you go through something difficult we are trying to show men that if you go through depression you have to find a way to deal with it as a man you're not supposed to be at that state. When you look at the girl child their problem for example with a girl in Kibera or a girl in a school somewhere who does not assess sanitary towers what I need to do is buy a packet and give it to them. So now how do we come and talk to these boys now who's problem most of the times maybe is emotional which most of the time is not something that is physical that we are going to see how do we deal with such issues that affecting the boy child. First this young man like he has said they like that guidance they like someone who tells them that it is okay to be emotional even as a boy. I think first and foremost as we are having these conversations with the girls it's also very crucial that we don't sideline the boys because they also need if it's life skills for example these boys need those life skills they need to know how to manuva in life so how we can address these issues is by having someone who can go and talk to them and elder brother who will show them that yes you are going through these challenges you are experiencing these issues it's okay to talk about them because traditionally men have grown knowing that you are supposed to be strong but we are human beings when all is said and done you need someone to talk to and you even need to know how to talk about those issues that you are going through so basically it's creating the platform where you are having a conversation with the boys and letting them know you can talk about it because if we empower these girls so much who will marry them they need a husband and the husbands are even these boys that sometimes we are sideline so it's very very necessary to even these conversations of sanitary towers these empowerment how to use a pad I find it very necessary for even the boys to be there because sometimes you do a lot in empowering the girls and in showing the girls how they should be impart with the life skills but when you're done the boys were somewhere playing in the field when you're done with those conversations the boys are the same ones who come and water down everything that you've told the girls so it's very important to have these conversations with the boys and the girls together an integrated sort of mentorship and empowerment even when issues like gender equality are concerned So with you Tom as the coordinator for welfare for the children and youth in this country what are some of the projects that you run that targets the girl and that targets the boy to try and make sure that these people can assess everything just at the same level because when you talk about gender equality we don't want you to put the girl up here and forget the boy at the bottom Thank you As an organization we benchmark on advocacy as a key tool in disseminating information and we realize that any child plays very key So we came up with sports and not only sports a sport that is very specific that does not need a lot of space So we use basketball as one of the advocacy tool to ensure that we are able to incorporate in boys and girls and most of the mentors we work with they run clinics in schools Like now as we are talking about out of school we have like 11 weeks all the way to as they go back to school So they initiate what you call the basketball clinics When in the basketball clinics we have a session where we have young boys and young girls training differently then we have sessions where they are able to play all together then in between the sessions we have the talks Some of the talks we ensure that we are able to understand what are the key things that are coming out and that's why you'll realize that some of the key things that the current trends of events are happening some will like me that's when I get to know some of the unique song that are coming up you wonder now I didn't know something like it's called Pegasio or something like that Pegaseng, that one I heard it when they were discussing within the talks So it means they are aware now we tell them what about that they tell you whatever is happening So we use sports especially basketball as one of the tool Number two we formed what you call the CAC CAC are children advisory committees now this children advisory committee we identify we give it an even number a team of 15 where we have either boys 7 girls 8 or girls 7 boys 8 we call them CAC where now we set what you call the grassroot groups now these grassroot groups are supposed to be those small clubs where now they are meant as to each other where they are able to identify the key issues now through the coach they can reach to a coordinate over that given grassroot group we also use acrobats as one unique way of reaching out especially realism most girls prefer using acrobats because acrobats result from boys So we use acrobats as an upcoming skill that girls can be able to express themselves then lastly we also run a program we call it AGEP AGEP is all about Adolescent Girls Empowerment Program where now this AGEP we train the mature teenagers to become mentors to the rest and we task one mentor to identify 20 girls that she can be able to work with now these 20 girls we task her now to identify two close boys that she can be able to impact their life just to build on what you are saying you realize that most of the teenage pregnancy that are happening or child pregnancy that are happening they are not caused by mostly adders from outside they are just peer within their circles so if this girl is able to talk to his peers and tell them now we've been told about why decision making so this is the best they are able to make a rational decision simply because now they are peers together then we also do the health debates the FGDs we normally have one hour discussion on a specific topic brought by the young ones within their own environment we are going to be taking a very short break but don't go far away we are going to be back with more on Y254 news updates thank you for staying with us on Y254 news updates and tonight we are talking about the girl child we are talking about the boy child we just have been a conversation on how do we create a balance in making sure that we don't neglect one group as we push the other to achieve a greatness so far we've talked about the causes we've talked about challenges at both the boys and the girls have to go through we've heard what Tom does through his organization and now I want us Gideon to tell us about what they do with youth mentorship foundation and also with the future now foundation as we also try to see what can the boys and the girls who are on all the day right now what activities can they engage themselves in to make sure that come January we don't have people who cannot report back to school and all that so Gideon what do you do with future now mentorship future now mentorship is an organization that we recently founded with a group of young people Patricia being one of them and in this organization what you're doing we believe that the future of the young people has to be realized now because if you don't prepare for your future today then you can as well forget about it because what you do today is what will determine whom you become tomorrow so what we are doing is going to schools talking to the young men and women those boys and girls and telling them that your future is your responsibility your future you have to work on it now because one of the things that we tend to believe and we were there some time back you think you have all the time while you are in school but reality is you wouldn't realize that time is really spent so what we are doing in the future now is telling the young people that work on your future today because you can make it we've been there we've gone through some things that we think if you avoided your standard better chance to exhale or rather succeed faster and what we are doing at youth mentorship foundation basically our vision is to nurture transformational leaders through mentorship we believe that as a young person you are a leader whether you have a position whether you have a title there is something that you can do back in your community all of us are a product of a certain community we were molded somewhere so our aim as youth mentorship foundation is to challenge this young person go back and do something go and hold someone's hand work with them whether it's never about the money it's never about who you are as a person, as Gideon, as Patricia you can do something in your community because you are a leader so we train young people to be leaders who will make a difference in their communities Tom we have people who run girl child initiatives and they are very passionate about it but I would like you to speak to someone today who runs a program who runs an organization that focuses on the cults and they are passionate about it but how do they now manage to create a balance to make sure that their passion does not disadvantage someone else with a boy child true we need to understand that this is not just a one day activity or an event it's a long term process where we have to start from somewhere and head somewhere and it's good that we are able to determine that where are we at the moment where do we want to get within the next 10 or 5 years to come that will really give us a clear picture on some of the key challenges that probably the girl may be facing and when we overcome them probably the boy may be facing the same a good example just benchmarking on our recent statistics talking about the sensors we are being told that the disparity between male and female is slightly not more than a percentage to what does that tell us we used to be told girls are so many but now it is becoming now we are almost overtaking we as men we are almost overtaking that perception that girls are so many so it's all about the program we need to initiate anything activity that might be running let's put into consideration under whose benefit is it the results and boys the end results of how much impact we have to the community in terms of the community can be able to realize we were able to run this particular program and it was able to bring all on board because some of the challenges we face as the champions of girls is we are always fighting for girls leaving the boy child in the bush so when the boy child come from the bush now is the one that messes the way my colleague was saying so consider put in mind what will be the spillover effects of whatever that we are initiating to both boys and girls and can both of them be able to impress it because you can initiate something and you find only girls are willing to impress it boys are saying ah you on your ma day they are not feeling to be part and parcel it's all about ownership let all on it and it will be totally a success that is very good so I would like us to talk about the role now that the society has to play because in bringing up every child you find out that there is a certain percentage which I think is even the bigger percent in you becoming the person that you had today is based on the rules that were there everything that the society the role that the society played so getting really into this how now can the society participate in making sure that we create a balance making sure that the society does not come and tell us ah the boy is supposed to be like this and we now start having contradictions now who do I empower who do I motivate who do I mentor and all that thank you Patricia I think what the society needs to do first and foremost is to understand the stereotypes that have been existing the way a society was looking at a girl we call them the gender roles what are those things that were thought to belong to a boy and belong to a girl how was a boy treated back then and how was a girl treated because I think that is where it all begins when we are looking at gender we see that there is a particular way each of the sexes was supposed to be handled but some of these things I think they are passed by time and as in the 21st century it is time we look at what is really important as far as empowering this child is concerned because as we speak there is a lot of negative exposure and this exposure is coming to our sons and our daughters the question is what do you need to do as an adult do you feel that it is your responsibility to ensure that you are raising a seed that you can be proud of 10 years to come because some of the things some of the actions that we are doing some of the things that we tell these children some of the things that we tell the boys and the girls they demotivate them and during their formative stages it is really really important to even watch out what you are saying to them watch out what you are exposing them to so as a society and society is you and I let us ensure that we want them to have a brighter future and we are the ones because today as parents we are too busy out there looking for money sometimes even thinking that we are looking for their money we want to give them a better life and we are upset in their lives but in essence because they don't have someone they can share their worries with they don't have someone they can go and talk to and tell them this is what I feel so who is training them they are learning from their peers they are learning from the TV they are learning from what they are seeing in the social media but that is not the correct place for them the correct source for we should be the ones we who are adults that's when mentorship is very critical as we come to the end of this discussion tonight I want to bring you Tom in to parents watching us tonight to young people watching us tonight you know that students are now on a break of two months they have November, they have December before the school opens again what activities can parents enroll their children in to make sure that they don't get lost or they do not involve themselves in drugs stealing and all that I'll say as parents very key let's go back to basics why the basics the position of a parent still remains the position of a parent because we've left children to become parents by themselves where they are able now to decide which is right and which is wrong so as parents number one we need to go back to our basics understand what is our role is to guide, to direct to provide and to ensure that model to our children and I know over the holidays so much is happening especially peer pressure you talk about drugs you talk about engaging in legitimate activities so I may propose to most of the teenagers out there and the young people that less engage in meaningful activities why meaningful activities something that you can be proud of even sharing with your peers that I'm going for this particular activity for instance I came to realize that there are even community libraries within our communities community libraries and very few can be able to access those libraries those libraries you get novels you get magazines you get even the good tutorials materials even get books that can guide you so less engage in meaningful use of leisure time less talk of sports not only football basketball even football is very essential less talk of music and dance young guys teenagers like music like nothing else and which are the songs they are dancing I feel so much disturbed when I see our young girls when the music is ongoing they want to dance that kind of funny dance we can train them that even getting into meaningful dance can make good of their energy so talk of the music and dance less talk of how best we can harness our talents we've seen clips doing rounds where young people are even able to imitate like their presenters so less engage in meaningful activities that can bring productive results to our people and come new year we have well engaged young people Gijon 30 seconds what can parents do what activities can parents improve their children here I've seen now we have churches we have most that have organized retreats for young men and women for these children make it upon yourself to just pay for them just get them some of these places we went to them when we were young and the lessons we got lessons that we could probably not get from our parents we could not probably get from anywhere so if you get a chance if you see one of those and you think let your young man go there very young girl go there because there is a lot of lessons and most important when they are not there be present in their lives thank you very much for joining us tonight to talk about this issue so as you behind today every person has a role to play if you run an initiative for the girl or for the boy it's your responsibility to make sure that you create a balance the society has a role in your apparent if you are an elder sibling let us all make sure that we are up front and we are on the forefront making sure that all these things are achieved for a greater nation thank you very much for joining us tonight on why to fight for news updates my name is Patricia Moryuki two of yourselves a very good night