 It's crazy how the things that are like such a problem in your life become all the things that are but a gift of your life. Yeah that all the bugs become features. Yeah that's my grandiose dream to like impart to other young girls who are sort of seen as weird in a narrow viewpoint is like that reminder that all that stuff that makes you an outsider is the stuff that later if you can just withstand the discomfort of it sort of becomes the stuff that suddenly that's the reason you know you're writing and directing and you know all this you have stuff in a weird way. I wouldn't wish that discomfort on my kid's self but I do feel like weirdly what allowed me to survive was this weird relationship where it was like my job to protect her or something and like in this very you know bizarre inner child sort of I'm always watching out for her because like nobody else was you know