 You need to buy a real flashlight. The ham you're using is like $50 a kilo. It's better than the cup and gum. Man, can you just stop fucking my food? OK, I shouldn't have to argue with you about this. Matt, are we live? I thought you were finished. Two thirty seven countries. Holy shit. Holy shit. Welcome to the podcast, episode number 15. That's 95 in total. And my God, have we been fucked? We're recording this on a Thursday. We usually record on a Tuesday or a Wednesday. So it's late in the week. And the reason for that is member. We went to Sydney to film a social media commercial with menu log and McDonald's. And we filmed all the behind the scenes. We got Julian up and then we fucking we rocked up. Didn't we? And what happened, Michael? What did we do? Hey, what did we do? We put our bags away and then we went out to dinner. We got Italian and then the hunt for weed began. Yeah, holy shit. I can't remember your name because my memory is all fucked. Fuck, we forgot his name. But dude, the guy who set us up and came and drove all the way from the out of suburbs into the city with a shitload of weed. Bosley and just let a smoke in his car. Rolled it for us. Thank you so much. So what happened was Julian put a story on his Snapchat. We thought we thought Julian knew this guy. We thought I just wanted Julian's little fucking mates in in Sydney. And he rocks up and then Julian's like, I didn't I don't know him. And he was just a legend and he watches the podcast and he's fucking. He was there with his girlfriend, both legends and just fucking. They helped us out. They we got so high as fuck. And we gave us so many joints as as he left and we smoked all of them. Yeah, we got home and we did some fucking with us and weird footage of us. I was still high in the morning. Yeah, when we had to go film the commercial. And yeah, there is we got strange. Oh, yeah. Like Julian had his own room. Me and Marty had one. So we're sort of playing like I was flirting with Julian, like playing knock and run. And I'd sort of wait for him to come out. But then I got aggressive and started hitting him. And then I'd lock the door and run away. You got upset. Sorry, Julian. But yeah, so Sydney and then what happened last weekend on the weekend? And what happened? What do we do on the weekend? We hung out with Jackson and watched some UFC. Yeah, we went to what you see. He's got a new cinema room. Oh, yeah. Can we can probably say that by now? What? Yeah, we can. He's here. Jackson's in Michael's room right now, masturbating. Yeah. And yeah, we had a good weekend last week. It's just typical crazy week film and fucking shit. Holy fuck. That's right. We had a successful experiment. And it was the reaction from our members has been pretty insane. I don't think with there's ever been a website video with such a reaction from from members. Yeah, there was like what? Over 50 U. M. O. University of Michael Post. More, more now. There's like fucking heaps. Anyway, just people were just so shocked and it works. That's the shocking thing. So as last podcast, we said that we ate a whole fucking kilo of corn. And then the next day we came back. We shot the corn into a sieve. We washed all the poo off. We boiled the corn. And then we were Michael in particular. My corn, I chewed too much. Wasn't really usable. So I looked like Pad Thai. I missed that. So I'd have a little bit of one corn kernel of Michael's. I just want to see what the texture was. And Michael had a whole bowl of his recycled corn. Therefore, in a way, offering a solution for poverty and hunger. Once this goes big, because it's going to like, it just hasn't got enough eyes on it yet. Because we got to we got to set up a meeting with the man next. We got to get we got to get investments in. We got to sort sponsorships here. We could feed Africa. We've actually got a meeting with the mayor. You know that now, don't you? We told you we messaged him on Instagram. We're going to see the man. This is no shit. We literally messaged the mayor of Brisbane once this experiment worked. And we're organizing a meeting with him. He doesn't know what this meeting is about yet. We're going to do a presentation. We're going to put Brisbane on the map. Anyway, because it's not on there at the moment. It's just Gatton and then Sydney. What happened? I don't know. OK. OK. Yeah. So basically, once this goes big, all right, and everyone knows about this. Starving people need to start shutting the fuck up. Good. Now you've got a fucking. Now you've got a solution for your problem. Oh, I'm hungry. Get some corn, eat it, shit it out, wash it, eat it again and again and again, and stop your fucking whinging. All right. I don't want to hear another word of it because there's so many problems in the world. This one's fixed. Go away. We did that now. All right. Done. Moving on to the next one. All right. Now, if you want to see that video, it is, of course, on the website. Now, we can't post that to social media. Everyone's annoyed that we can't post it. It's us shitting in a bucket and fucking washing it and eating it again. Of course, we can't post that to social media. We can't even. We shouldn't even be talking about this on social media. Yeah, now like people are going to start doing it. But we need it to blow up. We don't want to monetize off this. We don't want to fucking make money. We just we just want to help the world and just shut complaining starving people up. Yeah. So we've done that now. We fucking helped them with our fucking whinging and crying around. And we fucking solved it for them now to shut up. Shut up about it. And we move on to the next. Now, another annoying thing. You may have noticed there's been ads on our podcasts. This was so fucking annoying. We got an email from YouTube being like, we've changed our terms and services. And then you go down. Let me fucking read it. Let me read it for you guys. The email that I got. Let me just quickly find this. So many fucking emails. Oh, yeah. OK. Email from YouTube. YouTube's right to monetize. YouTube has the right to monetize all content on the platform. And ads may appear on videos from channels, not in the YouTube Partner Program. So what the fuck is that? So that means that YouTube can now put ads on any demonetized videos. And they keep all of the money, all of it. So YouTube's gone and put not one or two ads in our podcasts, 15 ads in all of our podcasts. That's like on our earlier podcast. That is one every two minutes. That's so fucked up that completely ruins the viewing experience. So we've just spent all day going through all 95 podcasts and removing all ads. I don't know if that'll probably hurt our reach. And we're probably not going to get any views anymore. But fuck me. The growth on these podcasts has been so hot to watch. We read every single comment, by the way. So keep them coming. I stay up so late reading the comments. I get good laughs. I get fucking so excited to see the likes going up, the subscribers going up, and the comments going up. Last week's podcast is one of the most likes podcasts already. So if you can't support us in any other way, support us by commenting, liking, and subscribing. That's all you've got to do. And if you don't know what to comment, just comment the best. Because that's what we fucking are. And going from that to the most maximum way you can support us, you can go to the University of Michael website. That's where the shit eating video, sorry, corn recycled eating video is. That's where we solve all our fucked up shit is that we're not allowed to post to YouTube or any other social media platform because they're so sensitive. Also, every week there's like a 20 to 30 minute vlog that comes out from our behind the scenes of the week. All that shit, yeah, plus the fucked up experiment. So free for 21 days. If you can just want to have a look, you can just watch the corn shit video and then you can unsubscribe if you want. And they've told us to stop saying that. They've said, please stop saying that because it's ridiculous. Did they? Yeah. Email. Oh, yeah. But the other sponsor, of course, is Manscaped. Now, if you want to buy some male grooming products, we highly recommend Manscaped. Michael's going to demonstrate how to use it right now. He's got a very hairy little cock. Yeah, I haven't been shaving for a while. You haven't been fucking. You haven't been fucking, have you? Yeah. Look at that. Lots of hair coming off there. Now, be careful with the ball shavers, OK? Just because they're extra protective doesn't mean that you can use it willy-nilly. We want you to use it carefully because you can still get your sack nicked. They've got heaps of other cool shit. And if you want 20% off, use our discount code FULLYACTUAL. That's all you've got to do, FULLYACTUAL, 20% off. Boom. So if you need to buy a hair fucking shaver, you might as well get 20% off from Manscaped.com. All right, let's go over and fucking chomps them support because they're supporting this podcast. Sorry to pause, but Michael, are you going to smoke your own pubes? I was thinking about it. Yeah, that's a great idea. Yeah, fuck it, dude. I did. I said, Michael's just shoved his pubes that he's just shaved with the Manscaped shaver into a pipe. And now he's going to smoke them. No, it should be a really nice sort of smell. Looking forward to it. Very red pubes, aren't they? Bright reds. This isn't going to go well. Oh, you can hear it. Put it over to the mic. Oh, it's going to hurt the lungs. Put it on it. No, put the flame to the mic. It's a funny sound. Fuck up. That's so fucked. You're a disgusting person, Michael. It's sponsored by Manscaped. Everything's in the mic. It's in me as well. Oh, there's so much hair. It's my throat. I feel like the reaction from the, because Michael and I, after the corn-shitting-eating video, were like, oh, yeah, just another video, then the reaction came out. And then we realized that we have been so desensitized to disgusting shit. You in particular, you always have been. I used to be disgusted by these things. Now I just ate a piece of corn from his asshole. That was my intestine. Oh, it did come from the asshole, too. But at like, yeah, at the end of the day, like, look at the positives. We fucking saved the world. That's so true, Nathan. We saved the fucking world again. It's funny you mentioned you're being desensitized to it. I think it was Joe Rogan, I was watching you, saying he's seen so many fights and he's seen so many people getting knocked out. It's not quite, it's not that shocking to him anymore to see someone badly injured. Oh, it's a normal thing in life. Right? Eating your own shit. You're in war. And you see some cunt blow up and then you shoot someone. It just becomes normal. Quite normal, yeah. Yeah, you do anything often in life and it's normal. And yeah, I guess living and being around... It's rubbed off on you. Yeah, it's sort of like, oh, it's not so disgusting anymore. So it's great. Thank you for that. That's all right. Yeah, and that's good. So I'm happy with that. Thank you. Yeah, that's great. It's great to see, so. Anyway, we've got a great podcast in store for you. We've got fucking Jax no Doherty. He's just fucking rocked up. He's just fucking knocked on the door. He's fucking come in and he's fucking disgusted at how Michael's place smells. Yeah, he didn't like the smell. We've come down to the basement now and he's upstairs in Michael's bedroom. And he's gonna come on a little bit later. All right, we're gonna do the diary entry first. Oh, baby. Yeah, yeah, Jaxon, he'll be on soon. He's just wants to get out of here. So we'll get him on as soon as these diary entries are done. We'll get him on here. And yeah, what else we got in store? We got a prank call coming. We got a PO unboxing. We got some goodies sent in. Yeah, we got the German segment of course. We have a successful hunt. We have some questions. He's ripped. We have a successful hunt. Yeah, I don't mind. Chappelle Corbie. So stay tuned. It's gonna be a gangbusters bitch. Sit down. If you need a minute, have a quick bong. Go on, smoke some weed right now. Speaking of, should we all wait for a little bit? Yeah, well, let me just let you... Pardon? Sorry. Who? On this day, I mean, diary entries. Oh. Ah, okay. Diary entry number 209 from Michael Brookhouse. I woke up with vomit down my back. I must have rolled in it last night. Ha ha, being gross is so funny. Ha ha ha ha ha. Disgusting, can't. Diary entry number 96 from Marty. Awesome night out with friends last night. Even managed to have a win at the pokey's. Don't even remember that one. Diary entry number 892 from Matthew Gregory Brown. Please be short and sweet. You know that they don't want to be Matthew, it is long and in depth. Just like the sickness in your brain. The sun kissed my skin as I rode my bicycle around the park. Children were playing, families were laughing, and my little brown was rolling around in my pants. The day was perfect. I closed my eyes and lift my head, and then it happens, a distinct scent swirls up into my nostrils. My eyes shoot open and my nose twitches back and forth, trying to locate the smell. My nose locks on and I turn my bicycle towards the source of the smell. The smell intensifies as I get closer. I can tell it's a group of teenage girls, one of whom is menstruating. I can smell that they've been talking about boys and blood starts rushing into my little brown as my arteries dilate. I'm now pedaling as fast as I can and I can feel adrenaline flooding through me. I don't even realise that I'm screaming. I see the group of girls sitting in a circle and hone in on the one bleeding. My nostrils are fully flared and my eyes have never been wider. I pedal harder and harder and the girls see me steaming towards them. They don't have time to process what is happening as I hammer straight into the back of one of the girls. I hear her ribs break and air being smashed out of her lungs. The contact sends me flying over the handlebars and I fly straight at the one bleeding from her slit. Arms outstretched and still screaming, I manage to maintain eye contact with her until I feel my skull connect with hers. I must have been travelling at close to 50kmh and the force knocks her unconscious instantly. I stand laughing looking down at the unconscious teenager. My little brown attempts to pull me closer but I resist the urge and play with my sweating testicles instead. Sorry about that, I say loudly as the teenage girls scramble away. The girl I ran into with my bike was wheezing on the ground and the period girl was still deeply unconscious. Between this up I demanded her friends, they were crying and trembling with fear which made my gills itch. My job here was done, I pick up my bike and make my way home. I gently whistled to myself as I finally come. I was wondering when that would happen, what a wonderful life. Look girl with the period, the period one, the slit, the f**king imagine hitting someone's back at that speed with a bike. And then using that impact to launch yourself at the other girl then skull hit her, not skull f**k skull skull. So are your arms would have been either side of her head right, and then your skull just would have been bang dead on that's fucking disgusting and you had itchy gills I like that one I'm all for that as long as no one was hurt it sounds like no one was hurt do you even remember these I have no memory at all he did used to have and that's why problem well that's why his psychiatrist told him to make a diary because he would blackout that's why I forgot last off they call it yeah you switch off so horny that your brain goes off and you aren't able to store memory remember no wow see holy shim I've actually witnessed one you got to stop smoking your pubes you're getting this stupid tell me is there any gas today anyway I got a harmonica I don't know if I said that last week expensive so we got a harmonica it's ready can you have a little play because you there's a but only chance you'll get to play asked us yet no I've put it deep within my mouth though so we got a harmonica and I'm gonna insert it into my crack slant ways yeah because that's all right you don't mind that touching a asshole because it does it's touching the because you can't push that into my yeah so yeah yes it's gonna work and then um yeah like you hold it there and I'll be pushing I'll be giving a bit of pressure though I haven't had much gas today I haven't had much gas today all right boys but now I have a good feeling about this we could finally play an instrument with fire yeah oh dude imagine if we have when we have when this has happened like 20 times and we can make a fart song oh put all of the sounds together see like we deal with serious issues but we're also very creative and we like light-hearted we create art as well we're just we're just good good chaps who don't mind a bit of a laugh it's like that what's that fucker who made that woman in France that fucking old lady clear Patrick Mona Lisa oh the painting we're like that person who painted Mona Lisa anyway Leonardo da Vinci that's us bullshit was it really pretty sure bullshit that's us have you not seen the Da Vinci code no what is she in it Mona Lisa yeah is she a real person she's um I'm pretty sure they didn't know who she was she looks kind of shitty alright guys now this person you may know him from Facebook Instagram YouTube hey and even fucking Tik Tok he's been around the world he's done some crazy sheer he's fucking he's fucked hard silly salmon he is the silly salmon so please everyone put your hands together for Jackson oh dody let's give him a second Jackson did you blow on the sheets? I just jerked off in his bed now Jackson we're gonna answer some questions together okay mate it's a little bit further away from the mic that's better he's being Riley Reed all right let's get let's get some questions fucking fired down at us can't all right first question is from Hilly Kush that's yours can I like move it down so it's not yeah you can have a camera for my friend you can have it man take anyone starts the last time I was on this podcast I saw the comments I read them and people said that I didn't see myself and I'm gonna answer to that I wasn't myself I was very hot it was the middle of summer was boiling in here I was irritated I was going through a bad day I just come off my anti-depressant medication so my intel state was a very up and down very confused about a lot of things but I can happily proudly say that I am back on a very good mindset right now I'm motivated happy healthy training a lot I've been filming a bit too getting back into it so yeah it's good to be back guys on with the questions Matt Brown sorry the fuck up Jackson will be reading the comments on this as well guys the first one is from Hilly Kush she was asking will there be season 4 of this podcast that's not for me is it yes sorry it's not Jackson should we have a season 4 oh wait you were asking me that yeah man all these questions a few do you watch our fucking podcast I haven't watched one episode you know how it subscribed you've only watched the ones with you actually do you know what I did one day when I was super fucking high I made like 800 accounts on YouTube and subscribed to your thing so 800 of your subs no I was worried that's that would happen yeah yeah natural it yeah dude I've just washed it this is what it looks like after I wash it and I'm not on coke and I'm not on drugs I just speak fast I have ADHD I'm just naturally a fast talker so just fuck off we're all drugless right now except for weed that's the weed isn't drug it's planned it's salad yeah exactly can't you're just having a fucking salad a night on it's salad that is a good way to say it what weed is salad yeah anyway yeah there will be a season 4 of course that this yeah this podcast is is becoming our home yeah coming our home we love it here yeah we love we love doing this every week and it's good to see the growth it's made it's motivating you love it Jackson's having a scroll I'll be having conversations with Jackson and he's just like this yeah and fucking with Julian's Julian's even worse no I play you guys just give me a break I've been really good my screen time's down like 60% just some cool should happen before and I was really excited what is your screen time and I probably missed my window let's all have a look at our screen time right now three hours and 24 minutes today I can't see mine it's filming oh my daily average is six hours Michael would have double mind but we work from our phones don't bear that in mind yeah me also like I'll put my I'll put like a podcast on a night when I'm going to bed and it will play for like or even listen to buddy real be time though yeah because the screens on now you lock it and listen to it not when YouTube's on why don't you pay for YouTube premiums you can lock your phone and listen to it why why not why not just have the free binary or beats is no I leave your phone open and then you just use your back no I face it down and I've got the charger in fuck we shouldn't come here you blew in my bed that's me is me Jackson a little cock a million dollar dick are you guys getting into crypto have you done any trading much yeah Jackson just helped us set up a little trust wallet and yeah we're getting into crypto I know there's a bit of a dive and it's a bit unknown at the moment but it's good because now that all the prices are lower you can start buying shit again but don't don't buy out of your means you know what you know what you know my little old saying is about the moment cryptos on sale lads exactly right lucky lucky told me that one I'm not gonna claim it but I probably told lucky at some stage he did he did say that when he walked in he said I've made up everything but yeah get into fucking crypto but not too much you tickling me I'm sorry hey not financial advice though yeah yeah we don't know shit about this we just get told to do things from other smart people and we're playing that to you in all seriousness guys oh don't touch me under the table why don't you shut up I'm trying to help these people more than you ever will come don't invest what you're not willing to lose exactly right don't just go like oh I'm gonna put a thousand dollars and then if it goes down it's practically gambling but it's not like yes is a good chance you're gonna make more money but if you can't stomach losing the money you're putting in don't fucking do it just do small little jibbles and do it more often just ease into it do and do some of the safe ones to start with maybe Bitcoin or something a theory you have to put much in he's putting like a hundred bucks theorems good so next question my flying my flying bra man the last one was on here was like I swear this podcast used to be funny oh yeah I know what happened I don't know man you need to get rid of Michael our next question is from James Kirk Patrick do you guys have a bad area of Brisbane such as other you know like you know slum areas where you know people go and do pranks in like really dangerous parts of their cities yeah every city's got them areas does Brisbane have one of them course we got Logan we got Taken take it just ill me just down the road with fucking this is this is a this is yeah this fucking heaps of slums around Brisbane mate it's not as bad as others and then the follow-up was that would you ever go do pranks there and those yeah no fucking worries man we're gonna go back to universities and start doing pranks there even though we have lifetime bands from all universities but the place we did the spicy burger was that a uni yeah QT Kelvin Grove do you call me a cutie next question is from Noah Jasek Jasek what are your childhood nicknames Martin Martin Martin Mickey Mickey shut up like from adults hey Mickey we had Michael's called dirty Michael in high school he's dirt bagging when I'm nothing's changed his fucking windows don't open his house record no shower was two weeks oh that's impressive man yeah I'd be very very proud of that thank you it's a nice resume that I'm not really proud of I've just done it did you have a nickname in high school yeah no naszym prim no I don't have any nicknames to be honest what I told Michael was just a G up because I thought was funny like that means a good word is a good word I I could see why All right, any good questions? Oh Maybe all right next question is from the flow And all three of you can answer this um What would your daily routine look like if you were all in a nursing home in 40 years? If we're all living together in a nursing home. Yeah, I'd probably be like Shitting and throwing it at Michael. Yeah. Yeah, but Michael would be already basking in his own shit Michael wouldn't move Michael had Michael to get the nurses to do absolutely everything for me. I have a big ball patch in the center Yeah, I still have long hair. Oh, yeah, there's come on this table in that little jar Michael. Yeah. Have you seen the cum? Oh, I guess do we tell the podcast for a video that you know that come that we got sent Michael wiped it on his arm. It's like white rubbed it in to see if it irritates the skin So in the last two University of Michael videos. Oh, listen to this Wait Yeah, what about this then? That's good. Okay, that's better than what I can do. Speaking of shits I haven't shot On the podcast. Oh, yeah. Yeah, do you want to try that now? Yeah. All right, Michael's gonna just continue I'll continue with the question. I've got a shit only thing, but I'm gonna try one If I reckon if you stimulate your bum ass, yeah, I'll finger it a bit Yeah, just the rim of it. Let me know if you need a hand down there more next question is from Dan Dillo I've got to go to the dentist very soon. I'm he's had quite horrible experiences in the past So you wanted to know have you guys ever had any bad experiences going to the dentist? I never go Terrifies me. I hate the dentist. Yeah, those I stopped going on the dentist You know, they used to bring the dental vans They used to bring the dental vans to school and that you you could go for free every year Hmm, but my mom signed the form and then I just didn't hand it in so that then I was never on the dentist list And I met because I wasn't on that year I was not in the previous year the next year the next year and I never had to go to the dentist And I didn't go to the dentist for 20 something years and you're only 20 something years old But it wasn't too bad when he actually went. No, I was I just just like two feelings or something I brush very aggressively and and try and I don't even floss. It's just that yeah, the dentist can get fucked They're terrifying. There's a good one in America that I usually would go to and he makes it not terrifying That's why that's what overcame my fear. He's a bunch of laughing gas and like what does laughing gas dude? He just makes you not really give a fuck about it. You don't get like, you're not high and shit You just like you just laugh locks and you don't give a fuck about like what's happening What are you Michael is trying to shit right now Jackson? The seat pressure yeah We talked about this you got to get a hole in your seat and you stand up with your seat with your knees up high I'm gonna sit while sitting down. All right. Well, let's continue with the questions and just see if Michael can go boom boom in his nappy All right, Michael make boom boom. Oh look how Ree's hard. It's trying very hard It's like a workout dude Don't wear undies with them sticking out. I won't grab it. Have you seen my bruise? No next question And rather not watch a 30 year old trying shit in his chair 31 thank you. Oh, yeah, sorry Fuck I was so close But ever since they hit a mill on Facebook, I've not seen them kiss once fame changes people man Name changes people it fucking changes people man straightened us right here. All right next question is from Bridgewater's finest Are you all right? Yeah, dude, I'm so close. It's like poking out, dude What's it like being the heroes of our time? It's it's easy so good It's fucking look at this We are fucking heroes and Michael sitting there trying to go boom boom, huh? No, it's fucking I need a piss Just let it all out because you don't have to throw down these away these mugs or something Being a hero is is easy when it's you when you're born to be a hero Hey Pardon you're forgetting the most important part With great power Comes great Say Cards yes Okay, I think we have lift off with Michael's poo poo. Did you really see yourself? Oh That's fucked. This is gonna fill the sort of wait. I'm waiting for the smell to the moment smells. I'm out This leads perfectly into the next question as well It smells no, I don't mind smells. I just don't want very good with shit. Oh fuck off There's a wet patch there Oh, no, he's pulling his pants Cheeks yes, it's in your fucking cheeks everywhere. I can smell it. Oh my god Yeah, show the fucking camera what you've done Michael go boom boom no no, oh don't don't let it fall out of your arse Oh, it looks like a perfect ball oh So much shit and then blood all next to his arse from the video that we filmed today That sounds weird, isn't it? No wonder we're not monetized Yeah, watch YouTube put 15 ads in this I'm just gonna sit with it. I Feel like I'm just gonna sit with that What do you mean? What do you think of your career sitting with us? What? What do you think of your career? I don't know like when I compare this to when I went on Logan Paul's podcast very much the same very much the same Oh 30 year old men shitting in their underwear and showing their other 30 year old friends and Contollerate that it leads perfectly into the next question Will you ever shit yourself? No Next question is from Lake McBurgen Have you guys tried or would you try a colon cleansing? I've done them. Yeah, Jackson's done on X. I've done like three or four colonics was a good hydro colonics So they're not the ones like the end of my way you fill your holes tonight and one big release It's like a little bit release a little bit release. They're like more chill. They're still pretty awkward feeling But I just go there to get the thing in my arse and I back up on that shit Yeah, that didn't fuck for free, but you're not gay like so can you go a bit more in-depth? So is it a machine that you push there's like an oxygen sort of thing and that pumps a bit of the oxygen and the water Into your stomach, which will puff it out a little. Yeah, and it almost feels like you're gonna shit That's when you're telling about the pressure. It's like, okay, I feel like there's a pressure They'll release all that and I just flushes slowly up It's just fine Just flushes out slowly through the little tube. That's in you And you see literally do you want to see a video of the pieces that were coming out? No, okay? Yeah, they're very good for you a heaps good for you man like yeah, I've heard things like when I did it You can lose a lot of weight. I think like the first time I did it. I lost like Close to two kilo maybe they reckon there's like 20 pounds of you can hold up to 25 pounds of toxic waste in your colon They say they're for over 10 years from dairy Like high fucking How many kilos is that what 25 pounds? It's probably like eight or nine kilo. Maybe roughly That's fucked up. Maybe eight kilo. I'm sure me. Are you googling it? Yeah, I reckon 10 I think it's like eight or nine kilo for 25 pounds. I reckon it's 30 kilo We're going 25 pounds. Yeah, I'm gonna say eight or nine. I'm gonna say 30 kilos whoever's wrong has to do a line of Michael's shit All right 25 pounds is 11.3 kilos. That's not too bad. That's a lot of weight So it's a ton of so much weight, but you're supposed to do at least three of them in like the first month or two So it can really talk because each time you do it will go a little further and deeper up into your like Colons and that and you can see parasites come out on the camera. You can watch it all coming out on the on the screen in that Earthworms pay it's painless as painless and it's Sometimes it's pleasure. I'm gonna do it parasites. You would have in you. You'd have heaps or you are a parasite That was a very unhealthy Parasites have parasites in them. It was a very unhealthy shit. That's wedge. Oh, I've had very fruit black salad It was a black shit. I'm gonna do a rock. What I think I'm gonna do it, bro You'll feel amazing on a serious note on a serious note on the educational side my like Mental space was so good after it like cuz even like little parasites. You don't see all the parasites coming out They're not big fucking things that it's like microscopic But when you get rid of that stuff that's in it can fuck with like your your gut bacteria If you got bacteria is out of wag if you've got too much bad or even too much good or not the right balance Completely fucks with your mental space your thoughts can fucking all kinds of shit But when you get those fuck shit out of your gut my headspace was amazing after so clear and just calm and like it was good shit We did it one of our friends James. He showed it how to do coffee enemas So we shut coffee up our ass a couple of times. That sounded fun, too Yeah, I think we put too much coffee in those fucking jerry ass That's what you do when you're in your 30s your friendship bond by sticking a my shoving things up your ass and watching A mate to shit his pants and I'll do one more question last question is from Addison leaf 49 Were you guys friends with a mat whilst he went through his stalking face? Yeah, and to be honest he fucking hit it very well like I always knew there was something a bit weird this man. Yeah Like I always knew there was something weird He'd always like want to leave parties early and want to get home by like you're a stalker and Yeah, it was I can see that very well hidden like always knew there's something. Yeah Now when you mention it, it's all pretty evident. Yeah, and now hearing reading these diary entries It's like, yeah, it makes a lot it explains a lot of shit, but he's shot. He has stopped. Holy shit. They explained a lot, haven't you? Well, I did recently go to Jackson's house. So now I know that where he lives Do you know when we're going home from talk art the first night like he's like, dude, I think that's a bit of a stalker He said that to me too. I didn't believe him like he said it the whole way home. He didn't sleep. I Thought his name was still he put garlic all outside his door in case Matt came That's why he spent the spent the weekend in garden nearly get away Because Matt knows where I live now Next segment keep the comment keep the questions coming guys. All right, and remember the most liked Questions will be the one that Matthew reads out Matt Fucking sick man. You are fucked in there or just comment because we will read every single comment Matt Matt will reply to nearly all of them. Oh, no, the shit's gone through I didn't want that to happen. Well, you're wearing undies. What did you expect? Oh, it's so much wetness now Why is it so much more? Yeah, it's like wet mark on the chair at least, you know, which chairs his now Oh, I can smell the baby. I can smell the garlic baby much more podcasts to get Man, yeah, why so early? Oh Anyway, what are you? What's new with you? Hang on a second. All right, I'm getting cool from the Tali Michael's a mock looks so uncomfortable Who did that though no one told you to do it. Yeah, well, I said I had to then don't fucking complain you shit your own pants Yeah, it will pass me did this You can't shit your own pants and then deal with it I said I had to do this in previous podcasts hence why I did it then you can't complain shut up Yeah, but that was me back then now. It's now present Michael is I Still disagree No, I just disagree That is the questions for today. We are fully grown men. We are don't cut this out gonna We are in our 30s and we're gonna open some shit that you guys have sent to us and we'll open this one No, good luck everybody. This is the PO unboxing. If you want to send a shit. We open it live on the podcast He's pure boxes. I can just go and send him a bunch of fuck shit. Yeah, cut your pinky off and send it to him Yeah, right I want to look in any of that shit. They're people send us fucked up. She's got to be careful Jackson. It could be anything Yeah, that's why I don't want to open anything. I'll be careful Michael. That looks dangerous. This says Tone ales is it it's a bunch of fucking tone ales. Oh No, we have to put them in and yes What is it? That's oh, no donut films. I recognize that yes donut films is a regular commenter to Michael I Think it's skin open it up and I might be a skin. I don't know. I do recall him saying something about he's gonna send it This is his foot skin It's his foot skin fucking putrid food skin dead food skin What about we sprinkle it on the poo. Oh, this is turning into the most fucked. I've had enough I was lucky to see everyone. This isn't my cup of tea A beautiful evening I'm gonna get away from the shit smell on the poo when he's undies and the skin. I love you all It was great to come on It was great having you. See you later lads Fucking pull you sooner on We'll come over this weekend Can you move over fishy-gilly? Yeah, yeah, sure. Oh Beautiful goodbye All right, thank you, uh, Jackson. I don't even joining us For our Okay, all right, so Michael's just been sent skin. What type of skin foot skin you have to put a piece in your mouth Just sit it on your tongue and see how you feel. Oh, is this really gonna happen? What's it smell like? I'm okay with the smell. Yeah, the smell is not I shouldn't have a little on my face If you're okay with the smell like a little dandruff. What do we get there, dude? We'll get back to the foot skin. I want to see the good. This is this is I think someone's just sent us a bunch of Averon cards so there says Marty and Michael fully actual scientists Oh my god, and we have fucking business cards. This is a whole fuck. Oh my god Revolution print. They're fucking sick as well. Look at them. They feel really cool Can you hold that up to the camera mat? Just give everyone? Do they want to shout out? Well, let's open the letter. There's a letter in here We're fucking using them so the other side All right Yeah, it says To Marty and Michael as you are fully actual scientists We thought how can you be the best without the best business cards? Anyway, enjoy and keep breaking scientific records from the best printer Leon Revolution print at revolution print fucking. Oh, thank you revolution print. I love them fucking cool Look at this. They've got like examples of the types of cards they can do here and man. They feel this one feels like leather Whoa, this one feels like fucking heaps cool And they've got all their Leon Wilson the director there you go if you guys need printing needs this these like I don't know much about business cards But these look fucking they look pretty damn good Leon. Thank you very much revolution print. Yes. We have fucking business cards now Let's let's put one up here One here Hey Yeah, I'll stick one side and then the other side around here. We'll put them up in the podcast That's great news and we must always carry at least one of these now wallets. Okay, fuck at all fucking times Do you understand that is a cool cool gift? Thank you now like it just feels cool. Here's my card Yeah, it makes the foot skin seem kind of gross now, doesn't it? Yeah, I'm pretty upset about that one This has been a very up-and-down episode All right, Michael I reckon just place one on your tongue and I'll pick it off for you if you like You've got shit in your pants and skin on your face. It's my own Hey, but Lisa got a business card It's my own they've hardened and they're like fucking nails. They've hardened if they'll soft and sticky it'd be worse Oh, man, there we go. Donut films. This is your time. It's like mold on one of them. Oh fuck you, man I was just about to fucking eat these Can't Look like little maggots in your hair Was one of his hangin gone and poured the skin on his head And he's putting his mouth he's got the foot skin in his mouth. Oh, he's letting them all this skin everywhere There is Oh my god, oh my god, there's skin There is dead skin everywhere. Oh my god. Do we have to blow this? Oh my god. Oh my god Matt get a towel or a gun. Oh He put all that foot skin in his mouth all of the dead foot skin Jackson I like that that was the past me that did it Jackson Don't you fucking My god, that was a taste like I think it's like skin foot skin. So it just tastes all right. Yeah, well, not really What is it salty or what? I didn't I can't remember dude So you didn't actually taste it No, no, man, dude stop getting that shit so close to me, dude. Holy fuck, please Boy, I can smell the shit and the skin. Yeah Can you hear what Jackson's saying Jackson doesn't want to be friends with you anymore. Oh Man, there's a big skid mark on the channel to what is happening. What is happening in this podcast? The smell is growing. Yeah, I know. Oh, it's just not on and I'm sitting in the let's get through this Let's fucking get through this man. We're going to move on to And last week we said we'd message Chappelle Corby and ask her if she If her sister Mercedes is a car or a human and she replied I will now read you the conversation And then I went and did something quite cheeky behind Michael's back. Didn't I Matt? Yes, see We said to her Hey, Chappelle. Hope it's flowing well for you We were just having a chat at breakfast more wondering is that old sister of yours a car or human and she replied She said human though. She's due for a good service with a wink face Which I thought was a very good reply So she's she's she's good. She can make fun of herself and then um, you know I was like, ah, blah blah blah and then I Michael mentioned that you find her quite attractive I reckon she's cute. Yeah. So Michael has a bit of a crush on Chappelle. So without my I didn't want you to fucking do Yeah, I was just about to say with our Michael's knowledge I started messaging her pretending like I was Michael and I asked her if she was seeing anyone and I admitted that Michael has a crush on her and she's like, oh I'm old and She sort of was dodging the question avoiding it. So I don't think she was Keen but it's like a little bit keen like I don't know. Maybe he's a slight interest I don't want to go on a date. Yeah, so Michael found out about this and said no He doesn't want to go on any dates. He just wants to fuck chicks. Fuck him without any dates at all He just wants to get him over Fuck not talk and then just get him out of the house. That's his goal And so he saw what I was doing with Chappelle lies and So we've had to leave that I asked her to come on the podcast She's declined for now probably because she doesn't trust us because Michael was hitting on her so aggressively But who knows we might get her on eventually because that would be a cool to have that'd be a imagine her stories Matthew Brown Fucking view fucking pig you stalker. I Have stalked her a bit. They would be some good stories She looks really good for 43 44 Michael 44 44 All right, all right, so that's pretty amazing We found out if her sister was a car or not no headway with Dave Husey Huse yet But we're gonna have a crack all right this week We're gonna fucking get in and so stay tuned for that hunt All right time for the prank call and this week we're gonna attempt to do what we tried to do last week I'm gonna call a tattoo parlor and say that I'm booking a tattoo for my friend And I want him to tattoo something really vulgar and fucked up on my friend and see what he says I'm gonna try and get the tattoos to tattoo. I fuck Animals on Michael, but I'm gonna tell the tattoo artist that Michael doesn't know that he's getting that tattoo on him Does that make sense? Hello, my name is Peter I was wondering if I could please book my my friend in for a tattoo sometime next week No, no, this is first time calling for me my friend my friend's name is Michael No, no he he has not been to the tattoo he has tattoos. I'm not sure where he got them from this is a birthday present for him For myself and he says he wanted a fish That he said what you know the the fish that people get It's a religious fish he said and he said it would roughly be between 10 and 15 centimeters long and 10 centimeters high My friend thinks he's getting the fish But we said with my other friends we had a funny idea and thought we would request it Instead of when when he thinks he's getting the fish tattooed on him Would you be able to tattoo something else on him? We would be happy to pay and it would be funny We thought if if under the fish we write the words I fuck Animals under the fish and then when he sees it at the end. It's already it's already on him and it's already too late Yeah, unfortunately. No, we won't be able to do that without his knowledge Just what what if I've what if we pay more? What if we pay a little bit because do you understand the the the joke? He would think he would think he's getting the fish And then and then he sees the I fuck animals underneath an animal We thought it would be quite humorous to see what he would say to that and he is quite a humorous guy You'll see you'll see he's a very he laughs a lot. So I think I think he wouldn't mind that much What if we change the the wording maybe to something else, maybe he fucks something else Maybe not an animal. He could fuck inanimate objects. He could fuck Table he could fuck hair Any of any words? Which which word should we replace? Do you think maybe I think he has to approve it first? I don't think I don't think he will say yes if we tell him Hey mate, I want to get I fuck animals under the fish. I don't think he will say Yes to that but I can ask him But I would prefer to pay more and have the tattoo done without his knowledge But he he consents to the fish Yep, he can consent to the fish, but he can't consent to the rest of it. So unfortunately, we can't do that As I previously recommended you guys want to pop into the shop. You guys can put down a deposit for a booking And we can talk about the fish design. So unfortunately, we can't tell you anything without his actual consent If if he consents to I fuck animals Would you be willing to tattoo that under the fish? Yes, as long as we get his full consent for it and we triple confirm everything Yes, okay. The reason I want I fuck animals is a funny story Many years ago. He was caught on a fishing trip Putting a fish on his on his on himself. And so since that day We jokingly say You have have fuck animals. And so that that is why we we think it would be quite humorous To put that under. Yes. All right. Well, I'll I'll look I'll give him a call and I'll I'll I'll ask him If we can put I fuck animals under his religious fish And if so, then I'll come in next week And we'll get the Jesus fish done up and I'll Show you the font for the I fuck animals And maybe we can work out a Reasonable price Jesus See you next week Pamela She said that she'll do the fish That's it. She said that she'll do the She said She would have been listening. Yeah, yeah, man. What's wrong with this? That last little Like coughed up a flurble. That was fucking very nice. Michael's got shit in his ass. He's got skin in his hair And I think Jackson doesn't want to be friends with us anymore He'll come back. All right All right. Well, sorry and we're the best We're the best We're the best We're the best we're the best