 Family Theatre presents Roddy McDowell, Ted Osborne, Jane Avello, and Peggy Weber. Hollywood, the mutual network in cooperation with Family Theatre Incorporated, brings you Ted Osborne in an incident in the life of Don Quixote, with Jane Avello and Peggy Weber. To introduce the drama, your host, Roddy McDowell. Thank you, Gene Baker. I guess we've all heard about people who go tilting at windmills. Well, this week we bring you the classical story of the man who did it first, the famed Don Quixote. In the imagination of his author, Don Quixote was a character of all the knights of old. A funny man, but a tragic one, too. We think you'll laugh at him and feel sorry for him, as millions of readers have done for the last three centuries. Herewith, the story of a man obsessed with a delusion. His name was Alonso Quiano, known by those who knew him best as Alonso Quiano the Good. He had been born into a family important to 16th century Spain, had lived the usual busy life of a man of the world, and finally had retired to the mansion on one of his estates in La Mancha. There he lived the life of a gentleman farmer, his family consisting of a niece, Antonio Guiano, and his household staff made up of a husband and wife from Italy. Alonso Quancho and Teresa Panza. As our story begins, we find Teresa, busily at work in the kitchen scrubbing some parts of the remnants of the evening meal. I cannot understand. Signora Quiano sits in that library of his, day after day, doing nothing but reading. How can a man past 50 expect to improve his mind? Maybe that's the trouble. When a man gets past 50, he might do anything. Just a way to let the Sancho steps a foot into this kitchen. Just a way. Who's there? It's me. You find a husband, a Sancho. Open the door for me. I've been waiting for you, you lazy good-for-nothing. Me? Sancho, what do you got in that box? Come on, get yourself out of the way, Teresa. How can I get in with these books with you standing there? Book, says it. So you get a Signora Quiano more books? Yes, yes. I get him more books. What do you want me to do when he tells me to get them and tell him my wife thinks he loses her mind? It talks to nobody. He don't eat his meals I put through the door. He just turned it page, turned it page. Let me see those books. What's he read about? What's he read about? Here, this one. It's all about the knights of old. Knights? Yes. Senor Quiano is talking about the knights. He says that people today just sit around and do nothing about the sorry state of the world. He says that just one good knight will clean it all up just like that. And just like that he's lost his mind. Oh, Sancho. The best thing about you is that your head is too empty ever to go like that. You gotta have brains. Sancho, where do you go? Sancho, you gotta come back and clean these pots and pots. I teach you. In another part of the house, the library to be exact sat a long, lean man with grey-white hair. By the light of several candles, he poured over a book with feverish interest. Knights errant were always feigned for their particular suits of armour. Suits of armour. Oftentimes they adorned the breastplate with an intricate design which they and they alone could interpret. Usually it was symbolical and referred to their lady loves. Or it might prefer in some vague manner to that person who had knighted them. But most important was the... What? I thought I said I was not to be disturbed, Theresa. I'm not, Theresa, uncle. I'm Antonio. Well, I'm busy, Antonio. Go away. I cannot see you. I only want you to know that I'm leaving. I've asked Sancho to conduct me to Signora Montillo's for the festival. Then why are you not on your way instead of babbling through a door and bothering me? Good night, uncle. Good night, indeed. How can it be good with all the evil in the world? Well, it shan't be for long that people will leave me alone long enough to finally extend it from top to bottom. Oh, yes. In its most fully developed stages, the suit consisted of 14 separate pieces which must be properly placed about the body. 14. And now let me see. 14 pieces. Oh, yeah. Oh, only 13. Possibly my grandfather was not in the fully developed stage when he wore it. It is unimportant. I have most of it. Now, as to putting it on... It was not an easy task. Senor Quiano's late grandfather had been a man considerably shorter than himself, and the inelasticity of armor contrived to delay the good man. Consequently, it was some hours before he had fully installed himself in the suit of armor. Now I've picked up the book for a last reference. Let me see now. Freeing himself for movement within the armor. This is it. There are a few general exercises which a knight unused to his armor may take to acquaint himself with the added bulk which could conceivably hinder his movements until he mastered the armor. One of the first of these is that he must learn to lean slightly back as he takes forward motion. This is to overcome the added pull to the front. Slightly backwards. Well, this is strange. There must be quite a pull to the front. Let me see. Oh! Well, not so much as I thought. This is a fine situation. I cannot even raise myself to a sitting position. Ah, the book. The trick for the knight is to learn just when to lean back. Unless he leans just as he moves his foot forward, there is a tendency for the weight of the armor to pull him over backwards. And as everyone knows, a fallen armored knight is at the mercy of anyone. Goodness! What is that? Oh, Kehan, no. I'm asleep and I come in here and find you lying on your back reading books. Oh, senor, what has happened to you? Teresa, will you stop that catawalling? I have merely fallen over in my suit of armor and I cannot get up. Now that you're here, you may help me. Oh, yes, that's all right, senor. Teresa is here. She's gonna have you on your feet in no time. And then we take this thing off of you and you go to bed, huh? Everything's gonna be all right. You just... No, no, no, you stupid idiot, not my feet. How do you expect me to stand with you holding my feet? Now, take my hand. I'm so sorry, senor. It's just that I... Hey! Thank you, Madame Tanza. Madame? Yes, Madame Tanza, that you are aware that you have been witness to the first incident of the Great Knight Don Quixote. Great Knight Don Quixote? Yes, I am that fearless conqueror of those that bode ill for those who bode good in the world. The Great Knight Don Quixote. Oh, I knew it would come to no good. And me here alone with him... My helmet, if you please. What? You will please to hand me my helmet. Now, if you will simply slip it over my head. Thank you, fair lady. You have rendered great service to a great knight. Now, I will close this visor, and you can help me more. Oh, no! Please come back out, the senor. Now, blessed lady, take this broadsword. Here, take it. Yes, sir. Now, hit me atop the head with it. We shall test the efficiency of my helmet. No, sir, that I refuse to do. You can act like a great knight, but I'm not going to hit you on the head with a sword. Police woman, wait, and I shall take this off. Now, I shall show you the folly of disobeying a great knight. Hand me that sword. Oh, no, not that, the senor. Don't kill me over such a little thing. Where is that helmet? Oh, yes, yes. You see, I shall place it on the floor, and, honestly, grasp the broadsword as any knight should, and swing it over my head in this manner. At the cost of the helmet, then, too, I would have killed you if I did what the atonement. Oh. Hmm, I thought it would surely withstand such a blow. Well, then, I shall have to repair the helmet. And cutie must not ride out in the morning without full armor. Senor, senor, what happened? I hear Teresa screaming here. Oh, that's my Teresa lying there on the floor. What's the matter with her? Oh, my Teresa, I love you very much. Please, no, but... Hey, what's the matter with you? You going to masquerade? It is easy to see, Sancho, that whatever part of Italy you come from was never honored with the presence of a great knight. Yes. Well, then, what's going on here? Were you afflicted with my wife as you knuckled down? Come on, Sancho wants to know. Squire, Sancho, do not lose your head. Your wife is the victim of her own ignorance. You know that I would not strike her. She was simply overcome. And I'm beginning to see why. Why do you call me Squire, Sancho? Sancho, why did you run off and leave me in the dark? Oh, what's happened here? Uncle! That's all right, Senorita Quijano. That's your uncle, and he scared my wife of Teresa, so she decided to faint. And now he calls me names. He called me Squire. Uncle, what's the meaning of all this? What are you doing with that silly suit of armor on? I forgive you, fair maiden. Your eyes are blinded, and so I forgive you. You failed to see the true knight that stands before you because you have never before stood face to face with the knight. Because the years of ignorance have removed the presence from the world of such ones. But I, Don Quijote, shall remedy that situation as of tomorrow, when I shall ride out at dawn on my horse as an auntie accompanied by my Squire, Sancho Panzer, and together we shall overcome the evil in the world. Squire Sancho, I shall expect to be called with the first twitterings of the birds for now. Good night. The twittering of the birds? You see, Senorita, who knows what has happened to him? Look, I don't want to go anywhere with him. But you must, Sancho. You know that once my uncle convinces himself of the situation, then that's the end of it. You must go with him in the morning and see that he comes to no harm. Thus it is that we find a strange pair riding along in the early dawn. A tiny little burrow struggles with the weight of a great fat man who is desperately fighting sleep. That is Sancho, oh, Squire Sancho. Beside the burrow walks a spindly shanked horse whose rider is encased in a tight-fitting suit of armour. That is the great knight Don Quixote de la Mancha. Senorita Don Quixote, we've been travelling the road enough for several hours and no sign of anyone or anything that needs to be rescued from trouble. I believe the world is quiet once again because of the presence in it once more of a fearless knight. Yeah, sure, I feel... Hey, I used to remember a place that has a terrible reputation for making trouble for people all the time. Then we must proceed there at once, Squire. That's what I think. Well then, let us go, lead the way. It's nice to sit here in the sun with nothing to do even if we fail to make money for lack of travellers. That's all you've ever done since first we bought this inn. Why do you not enjoy the peace and quiet like I do? Because it's always too peaceful and too quiet. Think about the fact that someone has departed from his senses long enough to want to marry Elena. I never thought I'd have a daughter so ugly. Well, even if she is getting married, it gives us no enjoyment because we're not even supposed to know about it. Yes, and you leave it that way. Just let them elope. I spent a great deal of time ordering that boy away from here and in general making them think he isn't wanted as Elena's husband. If he thought I wanted him to marry her, we'd never see him again. Little does he know that I have placed a ladder conveniently below her window. Jose, look at those two horsemen coming down the road. Strange-looking pair to say the least. Yeah. They are something to see. One of them is riding a burrow much smaller than himself. Hold it, sir Constable. We approach your castle as wayfarers and eat of food and rest for a day of jousting in the world. He calls you Constable. Yes, and what is more astounding is that he calls this battered inn of ours a castle. Wait, wait, we shall see what they're doing. Now stand as an auntie. The lord of the castle awaits my pleasure. Oh, I am the esteemed knight, Anciente de la Mancha. I will accept your gratitude for my serving at arms for you and for all good people by allowing you to lodge myself. I trust esteemed my squire and his beast. Lodgings are what we excel in, of course, for a consideration. Now I will retire before my dinner. I should expect to dine in the doorway of the castle facing the setting sun as have done the best of knights in the past. I shall be in the great fall. Never have I seen the likes of him. What of the squire of his? Does he too expect lodging because he has stormed the world defeating enemies of mine that I never even met? Hey, squire. Huh? Is he really Don Cioti? Well, if he still says he's Don Cioti, then that's who he is. Is he really a knight? Well, if he tell you he's a knight, then he's a knight. No, then, Estella, we cannot let them stay. I'm going to tell him. Why? It's been a long time since we've had travelists stop here. Have you forgotten, my good woman, that Yon Knight is allowing me to put him up? In other words, he has no intention of paying for service here. Oh, well, if that's all there bothers you, you can stop your worry. Senorita Antonio gave me much money to pay his way. Oh, well, then that is different. Estella, why do you stand there? We have guests. And after dinner, the old knight thanked his host profusely and retired to his bedroom. Don Cioti refused to remove his suit of armor, saying that no knight worthy of the title could do so when something might arise that would need his attention. Thus it is that we find him lying wide awake in the earliest hours of the dawn. A few feet from him, Sancho is lost to the world and proclaims the comforts of sleep for all to hear. Poor, poor Sancho. He does not know what he loses as he sleeps the hours away. If all men were to sleep, then the world would truly be overcome. But with mighty power for men like myself and the watch. The devil himself is cautious at venturing out. Sancho has represented this castle as one which is the scene for all sorts of devilry. Let the evil one present himself in the vicinity this night. But then he is crafty and knows that I do not sleep and am waiting for him. But all nights when they are not in battle or preparing for battle, meditate on their lady loves. Ah, my dear senior. Quiet, Sancho. I think I've heard something. Uh-huh. It is he. Old man evil thinks even a night sleeps this time. It's intent on murder, is he? I shall show him. Sancho. Sancho. Come now, Sancho. Wake up. We have work to do. No, no, no. Please, please. You are right, Sancho. This castle is a place of evil. Come, we have work to do. But it's not even a day yet. Where you go? Follow me, Sancho. I'm going out the window and up the ladder. Quietly now. We must surprise him. Perkele... Oh, please. Oh, first of the fair, Helena. I have hoarse without to carry your way to be my bride. So that is it. An emissary from an unfriendly castle. He plans to hold her hostage. And I'll be possible. I don't know if that bag contains all my willy possessions. And she, in turn, is just as determined not to go. Don Quixote is near, Lady Helena. Never fear. Come now. I shall start down the ladder first, and you must follow. I place my foot so... And right into my arms? Now I have your foot. Someone is out here in the ladder, Lena. It is I, Don Quixote de la Mancha. The night, and you shall fail to get the daughter of my host, the Constable. Oh, no! Lena, I must leave. Your father has set a madman upon me. Take that with him! They brought the fall out of me. Yes, and I am going to die. My game, my... Sancho. Sancho, like a good squire, you have saved the life of your master for further engagements. The first of which shall take place this very night, this very moment. Get up, Sancho. The time has come for you to attack. The disappointed lover raced before them through a field dotted with low windmills, prevalent in that part of the country. And upon seeing the windmills, Don Quixote was thrilled with the lust for battle. Good horses, Don Quixote. We are gaining on him. And you see what lies before us? The wily enemies come with an army of giants to aid him, and it becomes our duty to slay them one by one. See how they wave their arms at us. Faster, O bravest of steeds, faster, faster! We will charge upon the nearest giant and begin our joyous duty. Nearer and nearer to the giant arms of the windmill rode the eager knight. He had drawn his spear-tipped lance and held it forward, braced under his right arm, in imitations of the pictures that he had seen in many a book. Closer and closer. Until finally, horse, man, and windmill became as one. Senor, you got to be alive. Senor, there is so much your armor before I find you. It's not good for a man to fall in armor that is too small for him. He might get caught in a tool. Where is he? I will kill that old busybody. Where is he? The inner keeper. He's mad, Senor. You chased away the only man who ever wanted to marry his daughter, and he's mad now. Ah, there he is. All right, get back from me, my friend, because that man is going to die right now. No, no, no. You can't kill this old man. Do you not see that he's only just an old man who has done more than most of us? He tried to do something about the ways of the world. No, I will not let you kill him. Stand back, I say, or you shall die also. Please, Senor, please, do not try to kill him. Look, I take him away from here. I take him home. No, no, no, please, Senor Inkeeper, you don't want to kill an old man whose only sin is that he misjudged things just a little bit. Please, please, look, let me cut and I take him home. Please, Senor. No one could quite understand the obvious happiness of the little fat man who drove the cart down the road from the inn back to La Mancha. Behind him, on the cart, a battered old man lay with his head resting on the prominent ribs of a sleeping horse. Over in the corner nearby lay a pile of metal. Finally, the old gentleman roused himself and sat up, linting in the sunlight. I have been asleep, Sancho. What time of day is it? It's early afternoon, Senor. You might as well race some more. You need it. Yes, Sancho. For some reason I do feel a bit tired. Resonante looks exhausted lying here also. Oh, see, well, both of you have been very busy. Sancho? See? Sancho, the constable of the castle. He was sorry. Do you see me go? Sorry to... Oh, yes, very sorry, Senor. I trust he was grateful to me for having rescued his daughter. Well, he say he could not possibly repay you for what you have done. Uh, then that is good, Sancho. Oh, it is no easy task to be the only knight in a world of sin. Oh, no, Senor. That's a pretty hard... You know, Sancho, it is going to be quite some time before you and I go out into the world again. Oh, that's a good, Senor. Why? Because I have much reading to do. More books, Senor? Yes. You see, I must study the art of necromancy. Necroman... necroman... okay. Magic. Oh, yes. Because you see, that was how he overcame me. When he changed the giants into windmills. Oh, that is easy, Senor. That was the way he beat you. I simply was not prepared for a windmill. But next time we go out, next time it will be different. What is your favourite word in the English tongue? Of course, many of you will say your favourite word is mother. Others will choose home. I'm sure still others will declare that the most powerful word in the language is peace. Each of these favourite words is beautiful indeed. But there is another word that appears again and again on every list. The word is prayer. Here too is a strikingly beautiful word. Beautiful not only in its soft syllables, but in the rich train of thought it provokes. And note how the word prayer is linked closely with the other favourites. It is linked to mother, for it is she who first teaches us to pray. It is linked to home, for the home is the first classroom of prayer. It is connected by an equally powerful link to peace, for peace is the fruit of prayer among men of good will. These favourite words put us all in mind of another word, family. It is family prayer that brings the family to God to ask his help and blessings. Yes, it is family prayer that brings unity and happiness to the home. The family that prays together stays together. More things are wrought by prayer than this world dreams of. Our adaptation was written by Hanley Goodrich with music composed and conducted by Harry Zimmerman and was directed for Family Theatre by Jaime Del Valle. This series of Family Theatre broadcasts is made possible by the thousands of you who have felt the need for this type of program, by the Mutual Network which has responded to this need, and by the hundreds of stars of stage, screen and radio who have so unselfishly given of their time and talent to appear on our Family Theatre stage. To them and to you, our humble thanks. This is Gene Baker inviting you to join us next week when your Family Theatre will present Otto Kruger and Jeff Chandler in Henry Van Dyke's The Otherwise Man. Join us, won't you? This is the world's largest network, the Mutual Broadcasting System.