 Okay, what are we doing today, Sharon? Another remake, another sequel, another requel, live action, animated classic, reborn, retold for Disney Plus, Hocus Pocus 2. Oh, God. The Sanderson sisters are back to ruin your childhood with Hocus Pocus 2 on Disney Plus. Written by a potato and directed by a robot, Hocus Pocus 2 sets out to rekindle an old flame from 30 years ago. I buried two grandparents before this film came out. Tarot cards on the table. I'm not a big fan of Hocus Pocus. I know, walk away. This guy doesn't know what he's talking about, right? I just don't care for the first movie. That said, my wife and children liked it. I didn't even wanna watch this film. I figured, what am I gonna do? Just crap on it in a video for like 10 minutes. No, that's not fair. This movie's not meant for me. I'm not the audience, but they are. So I sat and watched it. Had a nice bowl of cereal in bed actually while we all kinda sat around, lounged on a lazy Sunday morning, and had a nice day of it. To the movie's credit, unlike most Disney Plus exclusives, we finished this one. My 10 year old son turned to me and said, well, that was bad. And I think my wife fell asleep an hour in. I know I fell asleep for a good eight minutes. It was a solid eight minutes. And then I woke up to more shenanigans going on. So there could have been an eight minute stretch of this movie that was so unbelievably good that it would increase my overall impression of this thing. But I don't think so. I think not. Let's talk about what you can expect from this. Well, it's a rehash. It's a retelling. We have the Sanderson sisters back in modern Salem times. They're a legend. Living legend. It's Halloween. People are dressing up. They're mistaking them for cosplayers, trick or treaters, but no, they're the real witches. Kathy Najimi, Bette Midler and Sarah Jessica Parker effortlessly go back into the roles. They're great as the sisters. They just don't have a lot to do here. I know Bette Midler said sisters a lot in the first film. Holy God, get some more vocabulary. That's all she says in this movie. Sisters! It's non-stop. We have some new children in this because the ones in the original are like 55, possibly dad. Who knows? So much time has passed. So much has changed in the world. They're awful. Awful's a tad harsh. We live in a polarized world where everything has to be a 10 or a one. These kids are mid. They're just nothing. They're Disney-fied, okay? They Disney went out and they're like, who are the most cookie cutter basic kids we can get? Let's put them in this film. Perfect. They have nothing interesting to say or do. This is a Disney plus exclusive if I've ever heard one. The effects are bad. Kind of there. Not really. I can't do shit in this movie. Outside of an occasional lightning bolt that randomly comes out of their fingers for reasons I can't possibly explain, seriously, this movie's so disjointed, so herky, jerky, disconnected, you would think you were watching a series of bad SNL skits. The two sisters get powers later on where they're like, whoa, now I can do this. I'm strong. And they start shooting at each other for a second. And then the movie moves on. Like none of that mattered. It was just completely useless. So much of this is just random nonsense. I feel like they didn't even have a table read for this movie. They just went in cold. Raw dog. Just on the fly throwing out dialogue and making up ideas. We do have a room by joke though, folks. A joke that keeps on giving me nothing. They have to get brooms at one point from a Walgreens, which is one of the main locations in this movie. Walgreens. We have Walgreens in a focus, focus film. Anyway, Mary Sanderson has to find a broom. So she grabs two Roombas and that becomes a joke that goes on for an eternity here. So what we have here is a rehashed script set in modern times. It's basically a copy, wash, rinse, repeat of the first movie without any edge, without any substance, without any emotion tied to it. In fact, I felt nothing in watching this entire movie. They have really bad visual effects and green screen work. Whenever they're flying across the city, it looks so bad. And they're shot in front of a green screen so often. It was just puzzling. It's like we can't shoot on location in some woods or at least get a set. Everything feels fake, artificial. Even the clothing, everything has a color to it that's so poppy, so Disney-fied. It loses any sort of edge that it used to have. I know the originals like light and fun but they're still killing in it. There's still a dark aspect to the movies. The sisters are sinister. Fun, but evil. There's music in this. There's songs and dance, which also feel very chopped up. Like again, did they just freestyle this? And they're like, ah, we'll patch together something. We'll get it going. My daughter almost left the room when they had that all-female ghostbuster-esque musical number. Thankfully, it's short-lived. If you are a big fan of the original Hocus Pocus, you probably will still find something to enjoy here. Like I said, we did finish it. It's not the worst thing ever. It's just such a mediocre waste of time all around and a waste of talent. We have three ladies here who are fantastic, especially Midler. I mean, come on, the woman can sing, she can act, she's funny, she's dramatic. She's got all the pageantry needed and they just waste these ladies. They're like second fiddle in the film. Instead of focusing on these lame-ass teenage kids, but there's lots of callbacks to the first movie, Recycled Humor, Recycled Plot, and a lot of people will be happy with that. That's fine, I'm giving you a heads up. If you don't like Hocus Pocus, this will do nothing for you. This isn't gonna win you over. If you're lukewarm on the first, this is trash. If, however, you're a hardcore Hocus Pocus fan, probably will get something here. Let me know in the comments, maybe not. Maybe you thought this was just the worst thing ever when insult to the original. Let me know, leave a comment below. Like the video if you had some fun. And if you excuse me, I'm gonna check out Disney Plus and see what they've remade next. Maybe like a Bednobs and Broomstick sequel. That would be great. Kill me. Thanks again for watching the video. If you really like what I'm doing, I'm on Patreon at patreon.com slash adamdoesmovies. There are different tiers. You can support the channel and you get access to 300 exclusive videos. I'm also on Twitch at twitch.tv slash adamdoesmovies. You can find me on TikTok. I have a Discord. I mean, I'm all over the place. 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