 All right, I'm George Kau and I'm really excited to be here today with Steve Mattis He and I have had a couple of really great conversations and I'm looking forward to Having him share with you his message and his presence. I think it'll be really nourishing For those of you who are well, I think just about everybody here might call themselves a heart-based You know self-employed professional or entrepreneur. So Steve Thank you so much for doing this welcome. Hmm. Hmm. Thank you so much for having me George I really appreciate the opportunity. It's been such a pleasure To connect with you over the past month or so. Yeah, and I've been really looking forward to this. Yes Yes, me too. So I want to just make sure that the audience has some some sense of your background And then I'll just read your bio and then we'll get we'll get into it. So Steve has been Supportively walking alongside clients. I love that since 2009 Helping them get what they really want in their business and life while staying in healthy connection with their heart along the way Steve's work is highly individualized and includes a mix of nuts and bolts actionable tactics strategy systems and technology Along with kind of deeper more foundational work involving the heart His commitment to building lives and businesses rooted in love is where his clients experienced in real magic He and his clients are living proof that you don't have to follow the mainstream way of doing business in order to find real success So I think a lot of a lot of you can resonate with this. So Steve, I'll let you take it away. There's We have more to talk about than we can fill in the time. I'm sure so definitely I'll let you start with whatever kind of you feel is It's most important, you know, wherever you want to start awesome. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you so much for the opportunity Yeah, I have five Key points that I was thinking about in relationship to you know, sharing this with with you and your folks and You know, a lot of the folks that I help the the primary reason that they come to me is For business and I've got a wide range of clients financial advisors and people who are brand new in business trying to become acupuncturists or massage therapists so many people in the healing type professions and In doing this work with not only my own business, but also working with so many hundreds of other clients over the past decade plus It's become really clear to me the business itself isn't actually all that difficult Which it feels really hard we struggle a lot I do too, right? There's a lot of Challenge in business, but what I find is that the business isn't actually what's difficult. What's really difficult is our relationship with ourselves It's our relationship with the business with the things that the business requires us to do like marketing or sales And those things bring up all sorts of stuff for us, right? Oh my gosh Yeah, I love this. I love this idea so much because it's It's totally true. I would agree with you. It's like it's like if we could relate to ourselves, which you'll talk more about with more Acceptance with more Curiosity and and you know all the stuff we relate to ourselves in a healthy way. It's Naturally overflows into relating with others in a more loving way and Yeah, you know, I think business like you said it's about it's about relationship with yourself and it's about relationship with others too right like if we relate well to us with ourselves we tend to relate better with others and People you know, it's so funny like I found over the years like people Hire us those of us watching this are mostly I guess self-employed professionals who are Offering some kind of service, right? So I think people hire us It's like I would say even maybe more than 50% of the reason they hire us is for our presence Yeah, you know, like like yes, of course, they want us to be a good acupuncturist or a good financial advisor Well, they want us to have the skills, but it's almost like the skills so many people have those skills, right? You know and so it's like people tend to tend to spread the word about Steve or about George or about Mary or about Sarah because they like Mary or Sarah or Steve Right, you know, and then they happen to be a good acupuncturist or financial advisor But it's like you can find so many good acupuncturist and financial advisor You just go on Yelp or go on Google or whatever it's like a lot But it's it's the presence and the relationship can't be replaced, but I'm sorry to take that away It does start with a relationship with oneself. So please continue on because that is the foundation really yeah Yeah, and I find that it's not only the foundation, but it's like the mortar between every brick that we lay because just like in Our relationship with money our personal relationships with significant others or partners With our family and With I think I might throw in there like the big topics like religion and politics and stuff all that stuff is Such a garden for us to walk with all of our crap Those are like ripe areas for our stuff to come up and a lot of the folks that I work with not all of them but any of them have some trauma in their background of varying degrees and I think frankly I think all of us have trauma to varying degrees and and That needs to be held and in the world that we live in especially in relationship with business There isn't really a Format there isn't a container for our trauma Which is which often comes up in relationship to our business for that to be held and cared for We not to be Appreciated You know, we don't have to be gilded like we've got to get over it or you got to forgive or you got to move on or anything else But just to be to learn how to be present with what is To learn how it impacts. Why am I so resistant to sending those emails to people? We all know how to send an email. That's one of the things that comes up often it with with clients It might seem like a little thing Right, it's a kind of an innocuous example, which is why I like it I feel so much anxiety. I've been struggling with sending that person to that one email, right? We know how to send an email That's not hard. It's What's going on inside? that makes it hard and so We could either Push through and get it done which you know, I'm try not to judge I'm super judgy, but I try not to I'm super conscious of my judginess We all are judgy and so That's one approach that could be taken just get it done and you'll feel better and that often is true But it also bypasses what's the deeper truth about our relationship with ourselves. What's going on in here? It causes that to be such a thing because if we can address That business issue at that level then the next time it comes up We have actually faced and held back and it gets easier the next time it comes up because we now have that experience to rely on And so even that with a lot of my clients we often and regularly talk about tactical business strategies and systems and implementation and Actionable items all that good stuff, right? But underlying all of it is how we feel about all that good stuff and where our roadblocks are and Really giving a lot of space to just process with that And I find that when we can work at that level Really working with the heart and the deeper self with compassion and mercy and gentleness and grace Then the other steps in business get a whole lot easier It's I love this. Yes, it because I yeah, I do find that I mean everyone who get tends to be drawn to to my my audience of those of you watching this very very smart people very caring people and it's like You there's nothing you can't do like I really believe that's the person watching this right now There is nothing you cannot do. You're like your potential is so vast Right, especially in your business especially in the line of work that you do is you can Have so many more clients. You can create so much more impact. You can whatever it is You're really setting your mind to but yes, it is it is like you said the the journey of bringing that out and the relationship with herself. It's so great. It's so true and And sometimes I say that you know business is really work really is a stage for personal growth Totally, it's like yes, it's like but beautiful beautiful. Yeah, so so yeah continue on that. How do you how do you? You had some of the five ideas, but yeah, how do you help your clients work with these things? Yeah? Yeah, so what I find to be true very often is that Clients come to me and clients come to I think many coaches to try to help get through those Obstacles and you the email as an idea or yeah, that was a really good example. Yeah Yeah, and that's a small thing. There's obviously much bigger things like how do I do a launch or how do I create a? Product or how do I create my website or like all those other things, right? Those are all much more complex than just sending an email, but it's easy to know something we can all relate to every day, right? right But you can find instructions on how to do all that stuff for free on the internet I could like it's all out there. None of it is really a secret and yes There are some tips and some tricks and some best practices or whatever, right? But there's a reason why you didn't just go do that because it's not a secret Either there's one of two things happening Number one is that you don't know how to do a website So you just need education just like if you're a massage therapist or acupuncturist or chiropractor You have to learn how to do that. You didn't know how to do that Before you went to school you had to learn and once you learn how now you can do it, right? So that's just a process of education. It's really simple and What I find and what I've seen in my clients is that they often are educated It's not that they don't know how to do a website. It's that they doubt that they're doing it, right? Or they feel like they have to do it in a way that doesn't feel right or aligned for them and there's no there's very little instruction out there that will help support that process and that's the process that At least in my experience makes it feel like we're running through sludge Trying to swim in a pool full of jello, right? Like it's just a struggle It's not because doing a website is necessarily hard. We need the technical skill, right? But we can always just hire that out if we have the financial capacity But it's our relationship with that. How do I write in a way that represents the magic that I do and Feel good about it, right? There's real beauty there and so that's where I find many folks come to me is to hold that space and I might I might even relate to it as to have room for the Divine feminine energy of holding and caring and witnessing and Supporting and also some more of the masculine divine masculine energy of these are the tactics. These are the steps to take This is what you've agreed to do this week type stuff to really embody and embrace all of it together One of the things that I found that Creates a lot of problems in the world and in our businesses and in our lives and a lot of struggle our power dynamics unhealthy power dynamics and I bring this up simply because it's it's actually a fairly new concept for me the original Concept that I heard was that there is no good or evil. There's only power and Stop me in my tracks and I don't necessarily Agree with that statement fully but I do What I did is I I looked at what I would consider evil in the world And I'll wrap this back to business here in just a second, but everything relates, right? It's all part of one this No, I love this conversation actually. Yeah, but yes. Yes. Yeah I was thinking of things I consider evil and I could not think of an evil act Where there was not a really unhealthy power dynamic happening Power as We there's the phrase power corrupts or absolute power corrupts. Absolutely. I think that's that's the phrase somebody said and we can use power for good Because power also can contribute to good but so power is kind of the root of Everything It's a part of the root of everything. There's another part which I'll get to Later in the conversation, but I want to remember that power is really significant And we have to really pay attention to it. And so the little dynamic that I want to offer here is And I've been practicing with this the past number of months, especially is looking at where we are struggling especially in relationship with someone else and if we're struggling power somehow is playing a role and Again, I'll touch on another part of it Later on in the conversation, but this is one of the Kind of like a spiritual insight that I received That has been really revolutionary for me because when I can identify The the power dynamic that's happening in relationship with someone else whether it be a client a perspective client somebody I'm trying to market to you and I could be talking here and I could start to feel wonky Maybe, you know, like you're the interviewer and I'm the interviewee and there's a power dynamic Maybe I want to have whatever like there's probably something going on internally That that helps me to take a step back and really address and so in my business when I'm struggling with something It can be really helpful for me. I often I'm not practiced enough with this to be able to do it in the moment I hope to get there one day but to be able to Name it at least to myself and give myself some space so I can look at it where how is power? Playing a role here. Do I have am I holding on to too much? Have I given it away? Am I trying to get it from someone else? All those kind of different ways it can flow, right really interesting, you know, I I think about marketing as well and how You know, the mainstream marketers are trying to have power over their audience power over they use triggers They use persuasion tactics. Yeah, scarcity. They want power over you I they want to they want to control your willpower to say, you know, you did you buy when I say you buy, right? No, you have above above above and and What I I hope I can bring more to it's like It's or sometimes Especially among the healing arts. There's a lot of fear of the audience the fear of the potential customers It's like, oh, yeah. Oh my god. They might say no, you know, or they might they might ignore this offer. They might And so it's like it's like you either you're like Overpowering or collapsing or something. It's like I'm trying to bring I saw often say like marketing can be like friendship Yeah, healthy friendship. Yeah, where it's it's a give-and-take. It's a it's a more of a playfulness It's more of a collaboration Anyway, I love I love this discussion and I really I'm grateful that you're doing this with your clients because that's really powerful stuff I'm aware of the time and I want to make sure we talk about Your your offers coming up too as well, but okay, but You know, I when I think about your work. I think about how you just you bring Love capital L love into into the work you do with your clients you help them love themselves more love the work You know and so Kind of maybe we can end on that concept like how what does that mean for you and how how does actually play itself out? Yeah, yeah, so because I brought up the first half of that dynamic. I was talking about earlier I'll tie that in here to the topic of love because that's the other that was the other piece of it one of the things that I learned recently is that love is the heart's response to Beauty and power and obviously we don't have time for me to go through all of it I'm actually writing something to share with with others about it, but I haven't I don't have it done yet But that's a really amazing concept for me When I look at something if I am not Feeling love which is what I'm as you said that's what I'm all about every email I send my kind of service mark if you will is more love not less Always and that's a l l dash ways. So it's all the time and in every single way, right? More love not less. That's hard. That's really hard to do Especially in business when there are so many opportunities for us to get activated or worked up or frustrated Struggling we have those wonderful amazing times. We're all lit up. We're doing our work and a client has good results or something, right? And much of the other time it can be a real struggle So if there's something that we're doing or an interaction or relationship that we're in where We are not feeling the love I want to invite you to look at Emma, can I see the beauty here And what is my relationship with the power dynamics here? And it's really interesting to see as the scale of of beauty and power Go up and down. We experience different qualities Like respect when there's beauty present, but power is much stronger. We feel respect If beauty is if we can't see the beauty and all we see is power we often feel fear And if as the beauty starts to come up, we might feel reverence or awe Or if beauty and power are both really high like a majestic sunset It's just it's that's where awe comes through and reverence comes through And if we see all beauty and no power like it brings out other interesting qualities and what I've been able to do with that is Really help it helps me to understand just using those two things of power and beauty That's my heart's response to love. So if I'm not feeling the love What's happening with power and beauty in my business or in the email? I'm trying to send or in the website. I'm trying to build Right love that really really powerful. That's really good stuff. And so if we connect with love Yeah at that level it gives us a chance to also look at our own selves And our own beauty and our own power And how what relationship do we have with that so that we can be In a loving healthy relationship with ourselves And again, that's the whole foundation Of moving forward in a healthy fun pleasurable way. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah Well, that's a wonderful place to Wrap up this conversation. Of course much more to come I'm gonna have your links in the notes below So I do encourage everyone to go and take a look at Steve's website Uh, if you'd like to sign up for his, you know email newsletter He sends this kind of content out to you all And uh, I'm also excited to know that you're you're launching a group program You know, we're we're recording this in january of 2021 And though some people might be watching this year from now So just go to go to Steve's website and see what his latest offerings are But right now as of now you're about to launch a group programs. So tell us about that Yeah, and uh, you know, I'll be honest. I one of the things that I try to do is I don't give my clients Coaching that I wouldn't be willing to receive So this is completely not set up. I don't have it structured I don't have it set up at all All I have is the software that I haven't used for a year and a half that I've been paying for Because I haven't been ready and this is my first public announcement of this Because I want to do something It's been part of what's in my heart and I want to build a group That has a community to it where we have real connection A lot of care where we talk about life and business and heart And that we can connect with each other not only for Kindness-based accountability type things but just for work groups I want to do some like some high performance type circles small groups that Will just be it's a I wanted to be a resource a place that people can come That where they don't have to spend more time online I actually am really wanting this to be a place that you Don't have to be on all the time and it will not be facebook-based That's something else. I'm really working on. I haven't been on facebook in years And it's been one of my favorite things in life is not being on facebook And um, this will be completely apart from facebook So I don't know exactly what it's going to turn into because I don't necessarily want to build what I want I want to build what people want and what will be valuable for them And I want to make myself and my heart available In service to that And so if anybody wanted to join if you join my heart notes You'll hear about that and I will be asking for input so that I can build what you want what will be valuable for our Our folks our friends. Yes people that need help. That is That's where real value comes from. Yeah, it's in this partnership and in this collaboration with you I love it. I love it. I'm looking forward to seeing that Um Steve thank you. Thank you for for the work that you do the presence that you bring. I think it's so special um, especially in the business and marketing space And uh, yeah, I hope those who are watching if you resonated Um, you know with with with this conversation with Steve's presence do look at his website. Check it out There's a link um, and Any kind of parting words of encouragement Yeah, I just want to say that if you're watching this and this if even if you're not watching this you are worthy You are worthy. You are enough You're not doing it wrong You can do this and it's hard to struggle But don't ever believe That it's your fault You just need either some holding some care Some rest sometimes or some education All of that's possible Don't treat yourself unkindly. You deserve more more love. Not less always So there you go. Thank you, george. I appreciate it. Thank you so much, Steve. Yeah, take care