 Hello my beautiful internet friends. That was a little bit aggressive But I'm trying to hype myself up to make myself do the thing I don't want to do I haven't given you guys a leg update for quite some time be honest with you I've been living in denial. I've been pretending like none of this is really happening. Everything's fine. My leg doesn't hurt all the time I'm not terrified. I'm gonna need surgery again and maybe never walk again I've also not been practicing with my legs. I'm not supposed to practice if it hurts, right? The last couple days It's been feeling okay, so I thought I would put my liner on try to take a step or two I haven't done this in like three weeks and I finally schedule a doctor's appointment for this coming Wednesday I'm officially super freaked out, but I know it's the right thing to do I know I need to stop avoiding things and actually move forward if I'm gonna move forward to be fair I fully endorse living in denial for a little while to be honest with you I kind of had to take a break from medical stuff and I needed to just like be me for a little while But that time like I actually need to move forward now, so I'm just gonna test out I'm gonna see how it feels gonna see if it like still hurts in the same places that I did before and hey Who knows maybe it magically healed itself and everything will be wonderful and and and great But I'm not gonna count on that I'll just be pleasantly surprised if that's the case should get my crutches though I just realized don't have this there's gotta be a more efficient way to walk up the stairs than I walk Let me know if you guys have mastered it Ta-da Now I'm just gonna go find my little leg. I'm ashamed to say where she's been hiding Yeah, you see all this here. She is Right down here. Come on out. I always forget to grab my other shoe this shoe doesn't match I always forget to grab my other shoe the matching shoe Cuz you know, otherwise, I'll be able off balance. That's an attractive angle. Hello little liner Shorts got changed from shorts to the only shorts. I could find let's not I was gonna say like don't make fun of my outfit But I mean go for it at this point. You see the curtain behind me moving. That's just cakes She loves hanging out behind there So far so good. It does immediately start like like this numb weird tingling. It's alright so far Let's let's try the leg That went in a lot easier and actually felt okay Apprehensively hopeful hello again, so it's the next day that didn't that didn't work out But last night after turn off the camera. I did try something I'm trying real hard to control my expectations, but I was able to take a few steps last night without any help That makes me like when I throw up to think about because it doesn't feel real So the reason I haven't been using my leg or even my liner This is my liner is because of like radiating just super uncomfortable pain whenever I put it on right? But yesterday it felt okay, so I tried it and it was alright and today I'm gonna try it again Just see what happens. I have a doctor's appointment two days But wouldn't it be awesome if it just like magically solved itself and I didn't even have to go I mean, I'll probably still go anyways, but let's give this a shot. So here's the thing guys I added the actual sleep, which I probably should have done a while ago I also like layered up in socks these suckers you put them on your your leg You thought it was gonna fall over there, didn't you and it felt okay, so let's give it a shot. Shall we? We're not off to a great start, but we shall remain hopeful Check that out guys. Let's see if we can do anything with it It's okay. Let's ditch one of the crutches I'm walking so it definitely does not feel good like there's there's absolutely pain, but it's not horrible Just saying Too soon. It's probably sore from last night because I definitely used a lot So we're not gonna get we're not gonna get discouraged Here's the thing guys because there's like so much stuff down there like fan of pain and real pain and those I mean it's two things really it's hard to tell what's going on Like I really have to focus hard on Sensations and be like, okay, what what am I feeling? Where am I feeling it? Is that fan of pain? Is that actual like pain that this happening? Is it something wrong with the prosthetic or is it like more of a you know, like I have to think hard Which is interesting because I've never had to do that before with pain like it hurts You know hurt somewhere it hurts and then you deal with it, but this is this is a whole new category Look guys legs got Lewis and we got cakes joining us for this shot So yeah, it definitely doesn't feel great, but I wouldn't really expect it to it got chopped off seven months ago And it got cut open again a month and a half ago two months ago two months ago So I'm just gonna keep practicing a little bit just keep wearing it seeing how it feels I want to have as much information as possible to like talk to my doctor about it and really give him like Detailed information instead of just being like it hurts. That's not helpful I can't imagine how frustrating it must be to be a doctor sometimes and have patients come in who need your help And they're just like it hurts like it just hurts and as a doctor you must be like I understand that But I need to know how I've definitely been the patient who is just like it hurts to fix it You know anyways off to practice a little bit more and then back to work But I would say that this is Words I would say that this is a very positive literal step in the right direction and um I'm excited. God. I actually feel like I might be able to walk again one day Oh, that'd be so amazing. It will happen guys. It will happen won't it lewis