 that was six hours long, or at least it felt like it. With all of these characters in it, and my favorite person to see on screen is a pen. They really did a great job writing. There was literally no reason for us not to get started. Everyone knows all you guys. So, do we do the thing where we all give an overview, or should we go right into it? What do you reckon? Ah, overviews, we generally do the whole, hey, what'd you think? And, you know, like, 50 words or less. Yeah, I just said too late, I already forgot the movie. No, we have like an hour or so left before everyone forgets this ever happened. We nearly did it. Dragon, and it's a big one. You know how hard it is to keep this movie in my brain, Mola? Do you know the strain? I know, people watched it in the cinema, going their cars, started driving, and they were like, man, Shazam, you know, did he do the red light, green light? There's the cars. Wait, did I see a movie today? Like, what's happening? Why am I in this bus in the middle of the night going home? I don't know, what's happening? I'm scared. Where is everyone? I watched the movie last night, and ever since then I've had, I've put little quirks in my ears so that I don't forget the movie, so the memories don't fall out during the night. Yeah, so I should be good. Mola, where is Az? Listen, if you watched the stream that he did, he explained, he literally just couldn't, he couldn't watch the movie, he just couldn't, couldn't bring himself to do it. Wow. You know, he's a tough one to watch this one, but as has been said, by plenty as far as I know, that it's okay, it's okay. That's what I've heard. Yeah, you keep, see, I told myself that when I thought about it a day later, it's like, I think that was okay, and then I started to think about it more. It's like, oh no, that movie is garbage. I will say, I'm a little bit baffled. I'm surprised that you would have thought it was just sort of okay. Should we do our blurbs then? Yeah, yeah, sure. Define the order for him, you go. Right to left. Right, meme, you're up. That's fun. Yeah, this film, it's like, I don't, I came out of the theater like it was lukewarm, and as it's gone along, it's kind of cooled into like, I don't, I just don't have any feelings whatsoever. I'm the neutral planet in the sense that I just have no ability to feel anything for this film beyond. Yeah, it's so hard to even, I just remember there was a lot of things in it that I was really raising my eyebrow at, and I knew as I was good, as I left the theater, I knew they're gonna fall apart. And, but the thing is in order for them to fall apart, I need to remember what happened. And I'm struggling at the moment. My brain knows it watched this film and remembers some of the bits, that some of the ideas it liked and some of the moments that it liked, but it doesn't really remember that much about it. So that's how I experienced this film. It seems to be a film of amnesia and of just, it doesn't leave an impression really. It's just kind of, you know? All right, which next up would be rags. Oh my goodness, what a worthless dog shit movie. I hated it pretty much all the way through. There was nothing of any value in here. There was a moment in this movie where I was just sort of amazed that these are the kinds of scripts that get many, many millions of dollars thrown at them. And they're like film, they hire actors, they edit and they do post-production and they have CGI and they have all this stuff. Like this is a full-fledged movie and all of that money and time and effort got poured into this script and it made me kind of sad. This movie sucks. It's way worse than the first Shazam and the first Shazam's bad, but this one is like a whole new level of bad. Metal. Yeah, for me it was the same with meme in the beginning. I was like, oh, I watched the movie. Oh, the end credit scenes when it was always like, oh, I don't care, I need to get my bus so I don't have to wait an hour to get home. So I think there were some, probably doesn't matter anyway because all that movie doesn't count to anything anyway because we're doing the reboot soon, right? Yeah. Unless I keep that. Hopefully, yeah. I don't know, I still don't exactly know how that reboot is going to work. Yeah, with the box office numbers of this film. They're probably not going to keep it, no. No. So yeah, this kind of went home. Then we had to do some other stuff. There was 3 a.m. I had to sleep. Then I had a whole day of work and then I started thinking about the movie again. I was like, oh, that was bad, that was bad, that was bad. Had a pen in it, that was fun. It was a fun pen that was in there. Didn't talk, so that was very good. The movie's completely tonally fucked. I don't know what the movie's like, oh, I'm so sad. And it's like, no, I'm going to do stupid quote, unquote jokes. And it's like, okay. Oh no, this person died. We're going to forget about that. I think legally they can be considered jokes. Oh yeah, I guess so. Yeah, yeah. And it's like, oh, we're going to focus on these two Shazams. But we forget about the other one, they don't matter, family. Well, so powerful about it. There you go. All right, I guess that's up to me. I have been graced with seeing this film, I think three times at this point, it'd be safe to put it that way just because that's why I end up doing that. But you'll know why when we go through this. And I know everything about this film. I'm going to be able to fucking delete all that information once this stream is complete and everything recorded. Ray, I, pardon first viewing, was getting more and more frustrated just watching the cinema. I'm so sad to see such lame fucking writing tactics throughout this film. So many shit excuses to get away with doing all kinds of things that people want to do. And the sort of approach with almost every payoff is that it's either incredibly poorly supported or it's subverted seconds later because they're just trying to drain every last piece of emotional value out of this IP before it crashes and burns forever. So yeah, you know, I don't think it's very good upon digging deeper and deeper, you know, some people say like, oh, you can nit pick apart any film if you dig deeper, some films improve. This is not one of those, not even close. What? I thought you were going to tell us it's going to be amazing. And you know what? Sometimes we end up saying, oh, you know, at least the CG and the performances in the soundtrack are all real good. Didn't really like the soundtrack and some of the performances were incredibly distracting to the point where I was like, wow, you got away with that. Okay. Magic fire. There's a lot, we'll go through it. But yeah, really bad, really, really stinky bad. Stinky. You think? Yeah, Shazam, Fury of the Gods, pretty terrible. I think it's almost going to sort of skirt by on the perception of being lame, like that it's a lame, boring movie that nobody really is going to care about in a week. But it's terrible. It pretty much suffers from like all of the writing problems that you can have. It is like, yeah, it's pretty, it's really bad. Yeah, those are my thoughts. All right, next. Cap to close it out. It's a dumb movie. It's not good at all. It's quite bad, in fact. But I didn't hate it as much as you guys did. I thought there were a couple of things where I'm like, maybe that was okay. Maybe. I'm sure that the more I think about it, it will fall apart even further. But I didn't hate it as much as some recent superhero films like Ant-Man and such. Though, I guess it might have been more disappointing than Ant-Man on some media because I didn't come away from Ant-Man thinking there was even the possibility of a good movie in there. Whereas this felt like there was some opportunities they had that they totally wasted, especially the ending. That really left a lot of space. Yeah, we can talk about that. We'll get there, I don't know. That's the worst part of the movie for me because there's something that they almost do that would have won me over a lot. I wouldn't have thought it was good, but it would have won me over quite a bit. And then they undid it. You'd have said they had testicles, but then you had to take that away. Yeah, they did not have those on this movie. No testicles to be found. They're not taking away testicles. Oh no. No one likes doing it. Sometimes it has to be done. It's not a good movie and I wouldn't recommend it to anybody. Yeah, I think when Fringy said that people will stop talking about this in a week I might have been overstating it. I think that it's never like four days from now. People will be like, we gotta hurry. It could be the next few minutes, like I said. Yeah. Like, change the start of the start. What are you talking about? Wait, where did that come out? I think I saw an obnoxious guy that we were, that we were just upset because Dwayne Johnson wasn't in it. Black Adam is better than this film. Oh, that's absolutely better than this film. But well, does anyone here think this film was better than Black Adam? I haven't seen Black Adam. I don't mean I'm not Black Adam enough to stay, honestly. Pierce Brosnan and the Falcon guy alone. I was talking to Shad about it on the Azzastream, right? And Shad was like, no, Wrath of the Gods is a fury. So, you know, Fury of the Gods is better. And then I said, dude, I don't like anything in Fury of the Gods as much as I like Dr. Fate. And he literally went, oh yeah, okay. Well, yeah, Dr. Fate was right, too. But yeah, Dr. Fate was carrying that movie pretty hard. I think that just the idea, even though it was really terribly executed, the concept of Black Adam's character passed, that's something. You know, like that's something. I have more to say in terms of him having a coherent story than most of everything in phase four. Like him as Black Adam is a character which is kind of mind-blowing. So, you know, it gets- Oh, and I mean, and I guess in terms of comparing it to this film, this film feels right out of like phase four of the MCU. Yes, it does. Well, it would fit in snugly, yeah. It would fit in very well, yeah. If you put Marvel Studios, Shazam Fury of the Gods on it, I think it'd just be like, oh yeah, it's just another fucking terrible Marvel movie. Well, and can you believe it? We've finally seen repercussions. I put it in the title. We'll probably talk about it, Papad through, maybe the beginning, more of the end, who knows. But DC, the state of it and the state of superheroes at the box office is starting to get very interesting. Well, yes, Ant-Man and the Wasquonsomania is probably going to lose money. This film, like who knows what this one's going to look like. Well, I think Ant-Man and the Wasquonsomania may not break 500 million, which is less than the first Ant-Man made, which was nearly a decade ago on a lower budget. So, and that was shocking, surprising in terms of how it's all going. Shazam's doing way worse. Shazam is opening a lot lower and it's another case of it costs more money to make. It's like barely 30 million or something. 30 million domestic opening weekend, which is not good for a hundred million dollar production. Been paying attention to what the director's been saying these past leading up weeks. You've known this film was doomed. He knew, too. Yes, he even seems to have known. Oh, I miss him. What's he been saying? Oh, I think he went on Reddit and basically said, like someone was saying, oh, yeah, damn, like the numbers. Hey, and I think he basically said something along the lines of, yeah, I kind of knew that this was happening, but I got paid. Like that was kind of the R. That was basically the message. Not the best of him begging on Twitter for people to go and watch this film. Like, oh. And then there was the Twitter as well, where like because they revealed that Wonder Woman was going to be in it and like a commercial that was playing on television. And he's just like, oh yeah, damn, like big spoilers out there for the film. Like, if you don't want to see spoilers, like don't go on like forums or watch television, I guess or something like that. So I was saying on, I don't know if this was open bar and all, but I was saying, like, why the fuck wasn't she in the marketing? And the answer was, well, you know, they, do you really think that was an accidental leak? And it's like, well, no, just market it with it at that point. Why? Like why do sneaky leaky? Like you just, just market. Go, go, go. I mean, what is that even worth? So remember they did it with Spider-Man, okay? When they were like, look, the Rhino. He's going to fight the Rhino. Look how cool that is. We saw every, you could have just, I'm surprised they didn't take that cheap shot of being like, one of them's in this movie. Come see it. Come on. Come on. Please for the love of God. You'll love her. Please. Keep it alive. Let us keep the lights on. Good God. So, yeah, I don't know. But in any case, we should probably get on with talking about the film, the story. Yeah, we need to. This will take a while. It will. It will take a while. Why? You know what? I should have just said no. Myself, self rags and friggy did a good, we refamiliarized ourselves with the first Shazam before seeing this one. And my God, they do not, they wish the first Shazam didn't exist in this film. So it gets in the way of the story several times. They're like, oh shit. Yeah, that's the rule we set before. Fuck. Like, well, now it's a different rule. Shut up. And it's like, oh, okay. We'll get to them examples as well. But I'm just saying, yes, we, I don't know if it's controversial anymore or not, but we all thought it was terrible, the first one too. It's really bad. It ain't as bad as this film, no way. But yeah. Yeah, that's the only positive that the first Shazam has is that it's not as bad as its sequel. But I'm afraid EFAP, was EFAP going when the first Shazam came out? What did we just know? Yeah, but we wouldn't know. Yes, we had how things roll out. Cause it's like, I think some people are like, why are you even covering this? And it's like, I actually find this interesting in terms of the, this is a big sort of tech point in terms of the downfall of superheroes at the box office. This one's a big one. Nest and Edman. And it will be very interesting to see what it looks like for both Marvel and DC for the rest of the year. And especially how it looks compared to other films that are coming out this year. So we open with a wonderful Ellen Mirren and Lucy Liu approaching a museum. And it's funny cause they walk up, I mean, you don't even see them first. You see that the staff from the first film in two pieces is in a display case and a guy is like talking about it in Greece. That alone is already just like fucking what? And I think a lot of people are like, well, what's the problem? It's like, did you see the first movie? Wow. Why is that staff in Greece? The explanation that he provides is that they found it in like rubbish. Like they found it at a dump. Well, so to be just to give everyone a refresher, they fought the big bad guy who had that staff in the first film in some like fair in Philadelphia. In Philadelphia. And he snapped the thing in half by breaking it with over his knee and dropped it to the floor. And so they're like, how did it end up in Greece? And he's like, well, that's where I dropped it. So that's where it's journey started. That is the line. That is it. That's where I dropped it. Yeah. How did it get to Greece? Well, I dropped it in Philadelphia. So that's where the journey started. Okay. So we're on the right planet. You meant to nail the planet. I mean, cosmically speaking, we're almost home. So I guess. I don't know. I'm not convinced. Okay, this is the first of countless examples of just, wow, you didn't give a shit. You just why did it? Why did it need to be in Greece? I don't know. Why did it get stolen it from Philadelphia or some museum in America? Greek gods. Oh, OK. Definitely. I could tell by looking at him that these are Greek gods. Yeah, apparently it broke three trash compactors. That's what they say as well. What? So like basically rubbish people picked it up threw it in trash compactors. Well, we don't know. Calm down, Moller. We don't know anything. Yeah, I couldn't play. OK. They were probably fine. There was a big battle at this fair. You would imagine that police and stuff showed up and somehow the magic stuff ended up just in the trap. This also means that, I guess, Mark Strong, when he talked to the police or any of the Shazamites, none of them like discussed. None of them mentioned this magic staff with his. Oh, they have a line for that, Rex. Don't worry, explain it. They say what the fuck, Sam, you left the staff there and he says, no, we all left the staff there, which is true. You all left the staff. That is true. But my God, my God. Well, yet another fantastic example of if you if the riots. If we suggested this to each other as part of the story with the other people, we're like, funny, what's the actual thing? What are we actually writing? That's not that's not anything. What are you doing? It's like, it's all right. It sounds kind of funny and we'll move around a log. Like, oh, OK. So so. So I really quick, just this mean that they put it in two separate trash compactors and it broke both. And he's like, you know what? Third time's the time. Let's try one more. That'll do it, I'm sure. Bring out. Bring out our best trash compactor for this one. Only our finest of trash compactors. Well, the call just really gone. They call Batman for a special special. Bad compactor, bad compactor. Yeah, it's just it's just so funny to see it there in that way. Just like that. None of this should have happened. And it's like, shut up. Got a new story to tell. Like, OK, fine. I guess we'll just move right along. So you have these two gods that have entered the room like, oh, shit, they are. I mean, oh, I think it's funny to know this ahead of time. They are the daughters of Atlas. Oh, that sounds pretty cool as a title, I guess. And one of them has the power of elements, which sounds like just all powers then or something. But it just means like ice, she can make ice. She can make fire. She could blow wind. Maybe she could use electric like lightning. What do you say? You know, we just see. I used to use that's about it. Oh, that's not an element and melt some stale. Yes, she that's that's he kind of. That's like fire elements. Remember when she peaces like a big line to make a platform around them? So what's what's that exactly? So I don't know. That's the element of the element of cutting, cutting, cutting, cutting. So yeah, she's got the shit tons of power. And the other one is Lucy, because that's Helen Mirren. The other one's Lucy Lou and she has the power of chaos. My god, Lucy Lou. Oh, I'm not by whatever their names are. I'm calling them by their actresses. OK, what is what is her character's name? Is Lucy Lou is Calypso. Helen Mirren is a Thera or something. Athena. No, it's not Athena. I can't remember her name. And the other one is Anthea. I don't remember that because of the stupid. Her name is Helen. Well, like I said, I'm calling them Helen and Lucy. That's a great name. Helen and Lucy. Lucy is the god of chaos. And you're thinking to yourself, like, Oh, what are the powers? And it's like one power, one power. OK, what's what's the power? You can go up to people and tell them to do a thing and they'll do it with like mind control. That can be more chaos. I mean, it's just it's just not what comes to your mind first with the god of chaos. You're like, OK, well, the third chicks power seem more like chaos than like rearranging the world. That seems like a chaotic. I've got I've got thoughts on her powers, but we'll get there. Oh, yeah, we all do. That's interesting image of those. They have one. There they are. So, yeah, Lucy Lou, that's the only power she has when she doesn't have the staff. And I was like, that's so lame. I mean, it's a really good power. Like it's really useful and strong. But how does it make you the god of chaos? It was to do with anything. It does all kind of chaos. You can say you do chaos and they all shit themselves. That's what I would do with that power because she's going to be the bad one. That's why. Yeah. Well, like in that opening scene, it's the closest it gets to being chaos because at least when she whispers into the ear, the other people start whispering into other people's ears and it's kind of this pile up. That's the closest it gets. And I don't think they do that. I think that was the most interesting thing she does with the power throughout the whole film. Yeah, right at the beginning. She the security guard goes to stop them and then she whispers in his ear and then he like goes rabbit and jumps on someone and whispers in the area. And it's like a zombie infection. But with that, yeah, that never happens again. Yeah, I thought that would be like I thought that would be like the plot was they had to don't know, there's a bunch of crazy people and we got to stop them. But that just ends. And instead, we do something else as we'll discover later, which is definitely way cooler. That one is a way more interesting movie, like a virus that's spread via speech. And our heroes can't can't kill the people because they're under a spell, right? You have to stop the spellcaster. So the spell breaks really classic shit, you know, really basic. Oh, we can't use our powers to kill them. We have to come up with ways to wrangle them or to capture them or something. But, you know, we don't want them to talk in our ears. So we better get some cotton balls or something. I don't know. It works. Yeah. So something really happened. Something really funny happens that I just weren't greased, by the way, everyone. This is in Greece. I forgot that was a country in Greece until you guys said it was Greece. It's like, oh, there are things that you just won't pick up while watching the film. And I think they rely on that. Yeah, it's so dumb because it just don't need to say it's in Greece. Just make it America. It's like, what? I don't believe it, Kelly. We fly. Great gods, that's good agrees. The first scene of the movie is them flying over the Parthenon where the Acropolis is. Yeah. And I just got like flashbacks from the Snyder Cut. I'm like, oh, my gosh, we're back. This is a classic location from the Snyder Cut. When I first saw this, I was like, oh, I wonder if they will be dropping in Diana into this, at least peppered in through the story. Like she'll it'll open with her discovering some disturbance. And then she's trapped in some thing. And, you know, because I was like, it's going to be difficult to account. Wonder Woman's in this film, but she obviously isn't going to be able to be a big part of it because she'll annihilate that guy. It was probably never a possibility because she's too expensive. Oh, yeah. Very expensive. Like she wasn't even a step with everyone else. No, she was. Oh, I didn't photo just come out of her. Yeah, but the director said that she was there. Oh, in that case, I was there, too. Well, so the stunt double might have been for that dream sequence. I think he said, yeah, it was. Yeah, they used her for the dream sequence. Oh, what a waste of money. But anyway, this split staff is in a glass case. And Helen Mirren walks up to it and she goes to a glass case inside a museum outside of the Acropolis where the Parthenon is. And she goes to grab it like any normal person would. And she hits her hand on the pain and she's like, eh, and she tries again and again and again and again. And I was like, what the fuck is going on? So at first I was thinking they didn't understand the concept of glass. Yeah, like they didn't know. They thought it was like a force field or something. It was. Oh, my God, it's like ants. It's like the movie ants. When there's a sandwich in the plastic bag and the ant wants to get it. But he thinks there's a force field around the sandwich. This is a really clever reference to the film. What is this hot air? It's hot air and then kind of unreal. As far as I was concerned, I didn't realize that here at Lucille, we have to work together to tip the glass pane case over and it smashes on the floor. Then they don't break it or cast any kind of spell. It's literally just a cover that has apparently got no like link to the adhesive sort of. Yeah, it's it just it can lift up and they do that. And then they're like, yeah, we got it. It's like, OK, that's the coolest thing to think of, I guess. Fine. And they pick up a piece each. Yes. And it like it does something to him. And I was like, is that supposed to be a signal that it's giving them powers? I think so. So did they have powers before then or they? No, I think I think the idea was because it's broken. No, because it's because the step. No, wait, hang on. It made sense from the right. Now we're strong from trying to I'm trying to arrange. It's they have that power stolen from them, right? Got a lot of mechanics to talk about here. But that was because the staff exists, right? That that all sealed them in. That was I don't know if you want me to. Should we do the Lord Dump now? So that you can understand the hell is happening. I guess. Let's do it. They have they got it. Have the gods in the God realm doing God things and then humanity and the gods kind of think humanity is shit, whatever, beat them up, slave them, whatever. And then one day Atlas is like, man, you know, some of these gods shouldn't have powers and some of them should have more powers. So I'm going to make a big old staff that can do that specifically. And then, unfortunately, the humans did an uprising and some human wizards, that's how they call it, steal the the staff and they steal all the God's powers and I guess killed them or a lot of them and then locked the remaining gods in their realm in a big old sphere. Um, are so how does this affect the continuity of like the stuff we learned in Wonder Woman? Like I think they are banking on you not remembering any of that. The fact that this staff apparently has Zeus's power in it. It's like, wait, Zeus, the Zeus that Ares killed in Wonder Woman. Like that's right. He's that made Wonder Woman with lightning or whatever. He used all of his powers to create Wonder Woman or whatever. Yeah. And someone just said, didn't Ares kill all the gods? It's like, I don't know anymore. I don't know because the thing is like Wonder Woman is in here and she recognizes this place is important to us. It's like, so you do share continuity, right? They're like, sure, man. How did you mention this? This just makes me realize. Wizards just makes me realize I've seen most of these movies and I remember fuck all about them. They're all so forgettable. Yeah, I haven't seen. I haven't seen Ares team up with wizards since that Harry Potter film. I. Yeah, where will there be? Oh, and I guess the the next part in terms of the relevance of the stuff is that when they broke it in Shazam, that was like the thing that broke the barrier that allowed these two to get in to like Earth so that they could go get the stuff. So how long has that staff been a barrier? For a long time, long enough that the fucking wizard should have mentioned it. And when it should have mentioned a lot of things, when when that when the staff gets mended a lot later in the film, we doesn't seem to work in that same way anymore, I guess. He's so great. If someone was like, why didn't the wizard say anything? And one of the writers just like, because we made that up. Wow, I thought of that in the first movie. We lost all of our notes. And also, we forgot the previous films we made, just like everyone else. A wizard did it because I was that I've already lost at this plot. I know, I'm so glad that you are. We're in we're in Greece, by the way. We're still in the family. I'm just trying to give all the back. So the Acropolis with Arthanon is the thing is, they need to repower up this staff to allow it to do its thing. That's going to be the next quest. So how do they get powers from it? How do they get powers from the staff? Yeah, because they seem to get powered up by it. Yeah, they get a little bit of it doesn't work as a little bit. Well, the whole point is that it got broke in the first one. But in that, like, affected something. The barrier broke the barrier between their worlds, rags. Come on, because the. Because that's how it works. But yeah, they're never told, never told, like, Billy about any of that. Because remember, the wizard didn't tell Billy basically anything in the first film, he shits on him for that. Like, he was all like, it's on Billy for that. Even though he never told him any of this. Mm hmm. So I guess what I'm trying to highlight is the wizard's staff breaking seems to break it, breaking the spell cast with the very staff to hold the barrier. The barrier breaks like, OK, I understand all that. Those two don't have powers, but they draw their powers back from the staff when it's broken before they fix it. Question mark. So it doesn't make any sense. Hidden in there. Had a little bit of juice left. So how did they get here without powers? They fell. The barrier broke. So they walked, I guess. But there's no giant space island where they live. No, I know. I know. I don't even I don't know how they got to Earth, period. I remember the other way that the only way that we see people getting to that room later is through those magic doors in the place that they don't have access to. Oh, God, that's even stupider in terms of writing. But yeah, it couldn't have been that. They say that they didn't do that. So yeah, they just walked here somehow. So yeah, do you know what I mean? Like the whole thing is absolutely crumbled and we're like two seconds in. We just don't know anything about anything like space and time and continuity and the stakes of anything that's happening. We have no clue what's going on. Nothing matters. Loose and loose with the magic. They don't want to deal with it at all. Yeah. So you said that they'd rely on us not remembering the first Shazam. I think that they rely on you not remembering previous scenes in this very film. Yes. I think that's a good way of putting that. So yeah, the mind control thing is spreading around the whole room. Everyone's screaming and running. And I just, like I said, it's kind of a neat power, but I don't know how it has anything to do with. Well, it also seems to lead to a bit of a dead end in terms of like a scene that's playing out because then they turn everybody into stone. Well, before that, we have a guy run out here with a baton. And I thought it was really funny. He does a little flippy, flippy flap with it before he attacks it, like a flourish with his baton while people are screaming and dying presumably. It's just like, what are you doing, man? He knows why he's here. He's here to, oh, man, he's been waiting. He's been practicing with this baton. He's like an old woman I could hit. Yes. In the world. Oh, yeah. Finally, I can be a security guard. And so he runs up to it and then I see my father was a security guard before me and his father before him. And now I'm going to prove myself and honor the family name by beating up this woman with this baton, just like I've practiced. And he doesn't even get to do it. Because Helen Mirren grabs him with telekinesis. It's definitely like this is her power sort of moment. It's like, OK, she's got it's pretty amazing, too. She she's got the zero point energy power that syndrome has. Just go when you're stuck and you can't do anything. Yeah. Remember, she can just freeze people. She just put people on pause. That's it's pretty good. Yeah, it's a power that she has. Remember this for later, potentially. And yeah, some of the guy then runs up to it like, please just let me go with that. She goes out of the blue and like a statue of Atlas turns to sand or dust, whatever. And it goes on everybody and turns everyone in the room to stone. That's like an elemental power, kind of. I'm pretty sure that guy was from pacemaker, I think. Really? The guy working in that music. I recognize him. And I'm yeah, I'm pretty sure he's in that show. So I guess that's that now. Yeah, I guess I guess that's some continuity, though, right, at least. Hey, this is a universe where like characters interact with other characters. There's not going to be any point in this film where you're like, where's Superman or Wonder Woman? We'll ask that a couple of times. So she kills them all. Yes, she kills them all. And she even knocks over one of the statues at Crumbles. And then Lucy Liu starts to introduce just how bad she's going to be in this film. She says, turns out museums are fun. Let's have more of it. I was just like, oh, this is actually a dialogue in this film begins. Yeah, I will say she's not got great dialogue to deliver. Some of the lines you're going to hear in the future are so fucking terrible from her character. But she was not given a shit. Elmira was fine. I even at times was kind of like, yeah. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, she's so good that phoning it in is still pretty solid. Lucy Liu cannot phone it in. She has to give it a bit more of a shot. OK. So yeah, this is the thing. I almost want to give this to the to the chat to see what they think, right? Instead of what all of us were thinking in the cinema. See if they share the same thing, right? We have Helen Merren's like the champions of this realm outnumber us. And Lucy Liu is like human champions are still humans. We are gods. Again, great dialogue. Wow. And so Helen Merren then tightens up on her and she says, do not underestimate the judgment of the wizard to protect the power of the gods. He would have chosen with meticulous precision the strongest, most keenly intelligent champions this realm has ever witnessed. Now, you're watching a movie and have expectations on editing or delivery of jokes. What do you think happens next when she says these champions are going to be amazing? We cut to the champions being shitty. Oh, yeah. Everyone's already said Q Joe cut to blah, blah, blah. You cut to Shazam literally saying, I'm an idiot. Yeah, so that's thus is the beginning of the first draft jokes that are all throughout this film. Yeah, that's the idea of the joke that you want. And then you like make that a joke, particularly with a joke like that. You go, oh, yeah, but this has been done like a billion times. So yeah, and like the different kind of twist on it. But no, it's the first, most obvious, most basic version of that joke, of which that is the vast majority of the jokes in this film. Yeah, when she when she said that was me, oh, we're going to cut to the. Yeah, of course, we're going to cut to him saying, yeah, pretty much doing that. It might even be worse than that because he wasn't even doing something stupid. He just said he's stupid. Like it might have even been funner if it was him doing something really dumb, like as a superhero, you know, like something because didn't he do like the whole charging people's batteries? Yeah, yeah, exactly. Like it could be something really funny, like breaking two by fours or something off of his head, something dumb and reckless. But yeah, it's the first draft version of that joke. Nobody laughed in my cinema. There weren't many people there, but nobody laughs. I didn't laugh once in this film. Didn't even go or, you know, kind of smile, not a single joke. I smiled, I think twice. I think there was one I smiled at, but. No, it's not very good for two hour comedy. No, no, especially when you have a film like this that takes so many shots on goal and they just keep bouncing off the like bounce off the backboard, bouncing off the room. I mean, I had a love when I when I realized that was actually only a few four people in my cinema when the movie started. I don't think it's super wise to open up, introduce him in the movie just by reminding me or like making me question why he was picked in the first place again. Well, that is the fact. I mean, that is the biggest problem, but they re ignite that issue in this one. And then they come in and double down. So it's to help people out. The problem that's being highlighted is that kid Billy is way more mature than Zachary Levi Shazam guy. Like they're two different people. They feel like two totally different people, right? Which the point was supposed to be of what if an adult had that like mind of a child, what does that mean? Especially if they're like super powered. And then this for some reason, this film and even the previous one is worse in this film is Zachary Levi is more childish than his child counterpart. Yeah, yeah, there was like multiple scenes where I was like, why is this in the human form, in the adult form? Like, why is this not in the child? That is kind of weird. There are a lot of opportunities where they could have, you know, they could have done something with these characters, like explored, you know, what it means for a teenager or a child to like spend all their time as the adult version and like how they prefer that and you could do some character stuff there. But they waste any opportunity for exploration there. And also the movie just incessantly reminds you that like he probably shouldn't have been picked as Shazam. No, absolutely not. There's no reason really to pick him. And to give a comparison of this dialogue, it's even it's not just the performances in the writing as well, right? You have the he's he's nearly 18, Billy. And he he says just this is one part of the movie. He says, you know, the wizards in my dreams now and he's trying to get me a message. I'm going to call an emergency meeting after school. That's for the superheroes. Like, OK, and then immediately after that, we get Shazam in the meeting and he's like, look, look, look, fam, I know it sounds crazy. And obviously, I don't know exactly what is all means. But but he he was he he was super aggro. He was super loud trying to warn us. And I think about the realms and stuff. It's just like, what the? You know, what happened? You're like different person. Yeah. You know, even close. It's like entirely, like you said, highly different characters. I don't know why they played it this way. It doesn't it's just like Billy gets taken over by Shazam rather than he is Shazam. Yeah, I think it was so much of the potency of the whole fucking premise. Yeah, yeah, yep. And a lot of people saying that's not how Shazam supposed to be. I'm not familiar with the comic version, but I hope it's a lot better than this shit. I should hope so. Yeah. I'm I'll give it to you. It totally is definitely. I believe you. I believe you. This is this is the issue, right? Because like for the longest time, like the whole idea is, oh, yeah, Billy Batson, he's this wholesome, wholesome kid who turned who because he's so pure of heart and so like just a good person and only a child could be this good. That's why the wizard chose him. And then in 2011, they rebooted everything and ruined him and went now. He's actually like an household, but the wizard like was dying. So he gave him the powers because fuck it. And that's how he gets it. That's the version they adapted. Congratulations, you played yourself. Yay. Oh, we could probably move on to the plot. Fine. Yeah. The whole Ivan, the deep thing. He is currently talking to a pediatrician and he's saying there's already a superhero with a red bolt who goes faster than me. Aquaman is literally huge and he's manly. Batman is just so cool. And I'm just me. Like, OK, I just put a wheel out those references to those other DC characters. It doesn't help because we're like, OK, so where are all those guys going to be in this whole movie? You can't like actually reference them, too. At least you could pretend to ignore them. You got to pretend to get a shit. Shazam is I think people like, oh, but he's referencing other characters who exist in that universe. Yeah, that like never show up. Yeah, but it's not fair. You can't do that. You're not a snake. You're slimy. You're a slimy snake. As everyone's pointing out, it's like, man, that must have been difficult to write, isn't it? Because Shazam is like he's basically Superman and he's complaining. Yeah, he's got he's very powerful. He has all the powers. He's one of those lame ass heroes who is just like amazingly strong and they can fly and shoot lightning and he's super fast. Like you suck. This is not interesting. You're just the best. You know, it's supposed to be that it's a kid. Control it all of that. You're supposed to be something to that, but they don't. No, no. And, you know, challenges that could be difficult mentally would be fun. But we don't get that in this. Oh, there's definitely mental challenges. And someone just said he doesn't even have the weakness Superman has. Like, no. And yet he's like, oh, I'm just not as cool as all of them. It's like, right. Well, OK. And then really subtle with the dialogue, aren't they? Just really getting the motivation through implication, never spelling it out like explicitly or overtly. You know, just just really make allowing us to infer really what he's going through. Well, it doesn't even seem to be that he's grappling with the insane responsibility. It's just like, I'm so dumb compared to them. Well, they say you have imposter syndrome. It's like, oh, God. And then you were saying about the dialogue. It's like, so what are you going to do with the people who don't remember the plot of the first movie? Not everyone is a huge Shazam fan, like me, Fringian Rags, who. Not anyone is just a shazam fan. And so it's like, how do we fix that? You know, a lot of movies try to remind you of particular events, especially if they're going to be important going forward. And so the guy is like, you know, hey, have you ever experienced any trauma in your life? And he goes, well, I never met my dad. I was abandoned by my mom. I ran away from 11 homes. I got into a lot of fights. I was abducted by a wizard who gave me superpowers and the dude just died in front of my face. A doctor conjured seven demons and held my whole family hostage till we had to rip out one of his eyeballs. And then everyone got superpowers, but now everyone wants to do their own thing. And I'm the only one that's trying to keep everyone together. All right. Well, now that we're caught up, Shazam 2 can commence. That's so lame to me. I'm just like, wow, you just try to describe as quickly as possible the first movie because you can't be asked to like, just put it into the movie in any kind of natural way. You're just like, this happened, this happened, this happened, this happened, this happened. Now we're doing this one. Right. Okay. Thanks. And that's not the worst character exposition in this film. That's the bad part though. That's the very sad part about this is that this is still not, we haven't reached the bottom yet. We haven't reached, not as far as I'm concerned. There is a moment that's coming up in the Rock of Eternity that I'm excited for, but we will get there. We will get there. That sounds like a Christian rock music, like what the CD would be called, Rock of Eternity, and it's just like lame Christian rock music. You're not wrong. That's all Christian rock music, but, you know. Correct. You can just say Rock of Eternity? No, no it isn't. So the guy says, so you're rejected by a parents, then the system, and now the city. I thought that was really weird because I was like, didn't you just say the system got him into his new family? Yeah. Yeah. And then rejected by a parents, like the system, he's rejected it. Because the rejected by the parents was like fair enough, but then he was a troublemaker who just couldn't settle down in any area at all. And then he found the family he wanted. And now the city, he's like what? The city doesn't reject me. I never said that. And then he holds up a newspaper that says city rejects Shazam or heroes, whatever. And that's the tribune. Nobody reads the tribune. And then the guy looks at it and says, I do. I thought it was okay. Yeah. The newspaper, you know. Like he literally would be the one that reads it. Yeah. So that's like a slight moment of just, someone in the script there. I think it was partly due to the guy's delivery too, who is in the boys, that character, or at least that actor. I've seen him around in a couple. In any case, yeah, the city is apparently rejecting them as superheroes. That's gonna come up. Again. Once, maybe? Well, kind of once. They sort of reference the idea that it's, so they sort of reference the idea that these superheroes are kind of causing trouble. But that's as far as it goes. They even blame the upcoming bridge sequence on them destroying the bridge. But that doesn't, yeah, somehow. But it doesn't have any consequences whatsoever. You would think that if the city actually thought that these heroes were causing bridges to collapse, there'd be some consequences to that. But no. No. No. It's just this thing that they almost threw in. They have a big old bucket of ideas. Right? They're just, they're taking an idea out and they're just throwing it in the movie. But they don't do anything with it. It almost feels like residue or like the remnants of a previous draft of the script where they're gonna focus more on that. It does, because they're gonna get dropped as a threat. We cut to kids playing like some Koldy clone. And I thought it was so cringe that Bailey says. It's like a mobile ad or something. Yeah, it looks like shit. That turns into a commercial or something else. So the Billy then is complaining about how he doesn't want to have to do this semi-regularly. And apparently the reason they do it is for training, right? The way he describes it is, do we always have to play war games? I was just like, man, do you imagine anyone referring to any FPS as like, when you're like, oh, you guys wanna play card or you know, fucking a shooter, you don't go, oh, we gotta play some war games. Like, they sound so boomery. Game about the war. The whole thing was so boomery. Because the first thing we see him do is come up and these people are clearly labeled hostages and he just blows them up and he goes, oh, man, I'm so bad at this. Yeah. It's like he's an old man trapped. He's the revision of Shazam. Yeah. Yeah, and then he says, hey, it's for practice for our other job, military strategy, multiple team members, each with a special skill set unleashed against an unknown enemy. And I was just sitting there, they get like, nah, that's true. What do you mean? Yeah, why would a kid even think that? Like each with a special skill set, so something they've wrecked on since the first movies, they all have all powers, not individually one power each. Why didn't they just have him like playing video games with each other like kids do? Yeah, you could just do that. Why did you have to frame this as this? Like, why are we doing this? Like, because we're kids, and we play video games together. Like that, why would we have to explain why we're doing this? I was probably with mentioning, this film said that, in fact, this post was kind of useful. Freddie got flight. How do you get her name? She got speed. He got strength. What did Mary get? Mini skirt. Something. And then the guy below her, he got electric blasts. Like they all basically got pieces of Shazam's power. But by the time he hit the second movie, they've all got all powers. It's just like, oh. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Fine, I guess. That's something I was confused about actually, because I was like, didn't they get like all different powers? But they just all use the same ones now. I was like, oh, okay. Yeah, I was like, I was just thinking, I think I gas slipped myself when I saw it. I was just like, oh, I must just be misremembering that last film. That's fine. It's okay. I think my brain was protecting me from thinking too hard, lest it explode. I think they literally were like, this won't be as fun if they all have one power each. Oh, nah. We can't be asked to write it that way because that's harder. Yeah, exactly. It is harder. You have to go, well, if they all can't fly, how are we gonna make sure they can all be everywhere we want them to be? But does it make you wonder if, just like in an original script or first draft, when he says each with a special skill set, it's like, that's not true. Yeah. It may have been true before, but it's not true now. It was barely true before. Oh yeah. And then unleashed against an unknown enemy. The vast majority, I mean 99.9% of things that they do are all things that they know what's happening when they go in. Because they get told through like police reports or news reports and stuff. If they, for example, oh, there's a car pile up and people are struggling to get out. Not exactly an unknown enemy. No. Unless they're talking about like the wizard man that they fought or the guards that are gonna fight in this one, which is like, oh, that's two situations over two years. Really don't think that. I assume that these last years, canonically, how much time is between the two movies? Two years. Two, okay. So for two years, they've just been doing normal earth crimes, you know, bank robberies. And no government has wanted to do anything about anything they're just carrying on. All right. They didn't wanna go to conduct when all that was going down, even though there was a familiar lightning bolt showing up there. Well, no, and they haven't been contacted by Waller at all. Either she contacts them at the end of this film. Kind of weird. Is that one of the after-credits scenes? It is indeed. That I didn't bother to stay for. What? That's like the whole reason we go to these movies now. Yeah, but I had to grab my bus. Oh. Sorry. So anyway. Yeah. He says in response to him talking about all the military strategy, teamwork, membership, special skills and stuff, Billy says, we don't need guns, though. We don't need guns, though. And it's like, does it have anything to do with what he just said? But okay. And there's a lot of that in this film too. Characters just say stuff. We're just like, wait, why did you? Yeah, this is one of those terrible films where people just don't like talk as if they were human beings communicating. Yet again, it's becoming one of my least favorite tropes is how characters are written to not have conversations like humans would have conversations. So why have an end credit scene when you restart in the franchise? Out of the two, one of them is pointless, like actually in universe pointless, they knew it was pointless. And the other one is promoting Peacemaker. So I guess season two. Well, that's why they can use it to promote James Godd's more stuff. Because everyone's gonna sit through the credits hoping that they'll be there. So might as well put something there. Yep. Because you've conditioned them at this point. So I can't believe when I was getting my notes ready that this is a thing, but the little girl's making a diorama of Genghis Khan and a bunch of unicorns killing him. And the dad is like, what is this? Why are you doing this? And then she's like, it's like revised history. And I think Friday or someone else says, well, unicorns aren't real. And like, after you see the film and you come back to that scene, you're like, ugh. Oh, that was the set up? You're right. Fucking hell. How cool. How could we possibly thought that was a set up? I actually think the writers would be like, hey, see, wasn't that cool? You're like, no. And she's like, look how quirky this little girl is. She's like, yeah, it's pretty quirky. Little girl likes unicorns. That's a set up for how there's gonna be unicorns later, guys. Like, I'm in disbelief that that was a set up. I really am. Well, that was his character arc is that he's like, unicorns aren't real. And then later he's like, well, maybe. Why would you say that? What do you mean? Something happened in the first film that was bizarrely funny where they all do an escape. I can't remember why, but basically they all teleport to like a titty bar type place. And they burst out of the door straight away and they're all just like, whoa, you know what the fuck I'm like, they're all kids of course. Now correct me from wrong rags cause we watched them and just like, wait, what? You had them all like panicking about where they're gonna go next and what's happening next. And then Pedro just says, yeah, it's not really for me. Not my thing. Yeah, it's like, not my thing, not really for me. Like the cameras, the whole film like almost stops to let him say that and then we carry on again. It's like, what? And it's like, oh, was that, was that them trying to be like, he's gay? Like okay. The fat ones, the morbidly obese kids, gay. It's very important that we understand this. The movie really wants us to know that this is the case. Well, so like, what I want to point out is just like, it's such an awkward moment in the first film and it has nothing to do with anything at all. And it comes across Disney style, so to speak of like, you see, there's a gay, look. Yeah, we're good, we're good guys. But don't worry, we'll get it again. And he's like, all right. And in this film, they do the exact same fucking thing. There's two scenes. First one, I think is fattier, but they're both pretty bad. So the mum is hanging out with Pedro and she's trying to get him into just stuff, hanging out with him and she's watching baseball with him and you see someone doing something on there. And she's like, you know, she's like, woo, yeah, fucking, hey, go whatever team. Good job, he hits the ball, you're in. And he's like, yeah. And then she goes, see, I told you this is worth giving a chance. And he goes, yeah, I'm really starting to see the appeal and his eyes drift down to the book he's looking at with a magazine. And there's just a shirtless guy on the page and it's like, what? I want to know how to write gays so accurately. You know how gays can't just like survive without ogling shirtless dudes in their daily lives. You see, mother, you shouldn't be trying to get him into baseball. He's gay. Yeah, you know that the gays infamously hate baseball. It's just so funny as well because of how over it is. Like, yes, I am very much into this that just looks at his naked guy. Like, OK, yeah, all right, fine. He's gay. That's that's they really don't do much of anything else with that character, which was kind of sucks, but it would be annoying as fuck to just like that. That's your scenes. Like, all right. Yeah, like the first movie where they just don't really do anything with them. Only really gets any amount of Billy and Freddie. They're the main characters. Everyone else is just around. Yeah, but the film insists that they're like a family. Yes, it does. There's like a thing going on and they really love each other. I'm like, yeah, we know. And like, it does feel a little bit like the the magazine, like if you must have this gag in there, it feels like the magazine is a little bit redundant when you have a bunch of sweaty guys running around a pitch all day. Like, I feel like you could have streamlined that gag a little bit if you needed to have the oh, he's gay gag in there. He probably could have been augling the baseball players. That that that was probably something you could have done. And then you didn't need. They almost present these guys. Cool after all, mom. They almost present gay and baseball as like opposites. I was true. That baseball is very good. Baseball is the straightest of sports. Because it makes as much if you wanted to like reveal the straightness of a character. How weird would it be if like, you know, hey, son, do you enjoy the baseball? He's like, yeah, sure, sure. And he's looking at porn. What? I thought you were gay. Okay. So, yeah, Freddy's listening to a police radio and it says possible two nine nine in progress, multiple reports of cracking on roadways and suspension cables fraying. They're referring to an enormous, it's the it's the Ben Franklin Bridge. I don't know if it's like a real bridge in Philadelphia or not. I assume it might be. I think it is real. I don't know. Why not? And so it's not unreal. Yeah, they're just reporting that there's cracking on the roadways of the bridge and the cables are fraying. Like, damn, that sounds disastrous. You should probably walk off the bridge until you figure out what the fuck is going on. We just reports. We don't want to cause panic. Uh-huh. Especially to all these people on the bridge. There was this thing and it wasn't the movie. It was rags that made me laugh. Okay, so you got, they're all leaving to go do this superhero thing. And they go bye mom, bye mom, bye mom, bye mom. And then Billy says bye Rosa. And she's like, oh, because he's not saying mom. Then rags, she goes, oh, I fuck the dad, I guess. Standing right there. That's right there. Then I give a fuck. They're all saying goodbye to mom. It's like he's invisible. He's not even there. And by the way, the dad is- Like why did you write it like that? The chill character that we kind of like always just tries to get by even though some weird shit happens with the parents later. But yeah, it's so weird that the film like just, it's like, isn't it sad that he doesn't call him mom? It's like, didn't call the dad anything? Okay. Yeah, at least she got called. At least she got acknowledged as existing. That's a start. And by the way, there is an arc to be done between Billy and the mom. And we've just had, I think, I want to say 39% of it is now done. Yep. That's it. So yeah, not bad, good start. Yeah, that's a really subtle arc they're setting up here. It's extremely subtle. You might think that it doesn't exist, but you'd be wrong. It definitely does. And then they do their cool, super awesome, really great walk through the middle of like suburbia and just go shazam. And they all like shazam up. And I remember thinking to myself like, fuck if any journalist with this salt was actually like trying to pay attention to the details, these kids would have been found out ages ago, not even like remotely difficult. Yeah. Especially when their house is then struck by lightning several times. Can we talk about that? Well, how stupid that is. What do you want to say about it? Go ahead. Oh, that apparently, even though they all know how this works, they keep saying shazam while in the house, lightning strikes their house and causes damage to the house that they don't even own that they rent. And then meanwhile the parents are like, yeah, I don't know why, but lightning keeps striking the house. It's like, guys, do you want to go outside? Yeah, it's particularly awkward when like the oldest sister looks the same as both the superhero and herself. Like surely it's over. You would think so. Oh, yeah, this is that. Oh, yeah, that's really hard to like accept because usually how is anyone having trouble with that? In fact, in the film, I'm pretty sure that Shazam says marry obviously. It's like, oh, is it obvious? It's kind of weird that nobody's matters to connect the dots on that one that you look identical. Oh, sorry. What you're referring to is when they reveal it, right? Yeah, that's right. He says, like, I'm Billy and that's Freddie and this and he goes, that's Mary obviously. Like, hmm. Not obviously enough for them to notice. The will to notice is kind of ridiculous, but, you know. Yeah, sorry. Especially if they just start their power just in the neighborhood, like someone just needs to look out the window. It's like, they're just kids just turning to superheroes. What's going on? It's constant lightning and then people flying away from that area. It's like, hmm. And also people yelling Chitam very loudly as well. They're just big fans. You know, kids are. I know, like, I didn't know. Because Shazam once and then that's it. Get back inside. It's a little bit nice. Is imagine one of the kids was just like, you know what? I don't think I'm going to go back to being a kid. Fuck that. Yes, you could do something with that. You could have done something is the yes. Shazam, you could have done something. Then you go, better go watch another movie. They'd be like, everyone else turns back and you're just like, I actually liked being tall, strong, fast and but I'll say wise, but you know, riders knew they couldn't do that. So and then it's just like, well, no, you got to go back to being a kid. It's like, no, I don't know. I have to go travel the world. See, this will be really fun, actually. So yeah, never addressing that shit because that would be interesting. So yeah, the situation is the Franklin Bridge, the all the suspension cables are actually breaking apart and all of the, I guess, the bridge itself, all the concrete is just smashed apart. And there was this big crash in the middle of the bridge into, I guess, something very important that holds it together. I can't remember which part of it it was, but everyone's looking at it like, oh, God, I think I think things can happen. And it turns into Final Destination 5. Oh, it does. Yeah. Unfortunately, nowhere near as much fun deaths, but that character who was the pediatrician, he was in Final Destination 5. Oh, I want to go killed by Buddha. Oh, shit, right. The acupuncture one. Yeah. Someone should make an edit that combines the two together. Why? Yeah, everyone watching this later on. They'll be at a loss. Because, you know. But then I kind of want to talk about music first, OK? So the scenario is everyone's screaming and running away, but there's plenty of dumbasses in the cars who just sit and stare. I'll give it to them that they try to portray. The woman has just stunned with shock, I guess. Like, all right, yeah, there's people in the room. There's still the radio on and it's playing. I Need a Hero, famously, the song from Shrek 2. Shrek 2, yes. Yeah. It plays for and I counted because I was curious. It plays for 20 seconds. And then we cut it out to go to like pure dread music because a car is just over a crack and it sits falling into the water below, which likely kill it. So it's like, and it's like, yeah, OK. And, you know, the first thought I had was like, wow, 20 seconds of I Need a Hero and it's gone. It's strange, but OK. And then we cut to about 22 seconds of, I would say, tragic music, like they bring in choir and it basically the sense that, oh, she's dead, it's over, it's all over. And then you hard cut again to the blaring I Need a Hero as Shazam grabs the car. And I was just like, wow, that felt odd. I guess that's a choice. Like it's it's hard to say exactly what you're supposed to do with music, but it just distracted the hell out of me. I was like, it's very strange. Yeah, it's like they didn't know how to. They wanted the song. They paid for it and they wanted to get their money's worth out of it, but they didn't quite know how. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, just tried to get as much as they could in between their own music. Yeah, well, let's compare this to Shrek 2 where they incorporate the Shrek theme into I Need a Hero and kind of create their own version from it and make it more thematically relevant while this one is kind of just shoved it in there with a crowbar and a plunger. Well, you know what, they hear us. I remember that sequence of Shrek 2 being hype. Being yeah, it was really cool. Yeah, yeah, the sacrifice. He's on the horse. Right. Let's ride. No. Then he sings of the. Of course. Yeah. Think to think if we have a new Shrek starring Puss in Boots, we'll be like, let's go. Let's go. Yes, well, yeah. But yeah, then you have Freddie arriving. He says, no need to panic. Captain, every power is here. And he and I did mention this, but I was going to just pause. Not familiar enough with them to know. He grabs two cars and pulls them fully up from falling off into a crack just by their bumpers. Seems like. Yeah, probably not. I'm not going to hold. No, no. It's just all the way, you know, all of the force right localized into your hand on that point of the car. But it'd be the. Yeah, it's the same as the one Shazam caught the bus like on the pane of glass that was shattering with like the front of his hands. Yeah, he was holding up the entire bus by putting his hands on the crack. That was shield. Yeah, that was right. So same thing here, but whatever. It's a superhero movie. Yeah, whatever. Do you mean just whatever superhero movie should we see this all the time? Yeah, like it's not even worth fighting about that one. Well, no, it's just stated as like, yeah, it's one of those ones guys moving on as one of those one. So a lot of people like hundreds of being saved with super speed. In fact, we find out it's one hundred and sixty six because she mentions it. I guess we're not going to bother addressing whiplash, which is going to be like, no, no, that was my first thought. It's like, oh, you're all dead. OK, no, it's fine. Yeah, that's another superhero movie, regular thing. It just happens all the time. Yeah, what was the film where somebody actually put their hand on the back of someone's head to do the super speed thing? Because I know what you're thinking about. Wait, what did you say? Was it as if you lost? Was it that or was it? Lash, again, because it was a quick silver and magneto. OK, maybe it was. Yeah, why didn't everyone learn from that? Yeah. Even then, you're going to encounter issues when you go to fucking light speed. I'm sure, but like, that's at least accounting for it a little bit. But then the thing is, is with super speed, the big question you'll be asking throughout the whole film is, why don't you guys use that more often? And then you'll be like, well, as long as they never use it, maybe we'll put it in the back of our mind. It's like, nope, they use it to save the day. They use it there. Yeah, they use a lot happens a bunch, but then they keep forgetting to use it at moments where it would be like really critical and essential. And would say, yeah, exactly. Like we're at the low variable shit right now. We're back to things making a little bit more sense and Tim's just a lot of variables. Collapsing bridge. That's what I'm saying, compared to where we're going to go. Yeah, it's going to get difficult for everyone to follow along and shout at that point. So yeah, they're doing all that. And then you have this moment where I think I can't remember if they had like a hierarchy. I think they consider Mary the smart one out of everyone. I guess that was part of the fact that she got Solomon, the wisdom Solomon when they split to seven in the first movie. But like I said, everyone has everything now, so it doesn't really matter. In any case, the other dudes, the, I forget all their names, the one below Mary in this poster, he's come up with an idea. What if the frayed and broken apart suspension cables, what if you melt the top and bottom of it where it broke and then smoosh it back so it reconnects? No. Goes about as well as you'd expect. So the first thing I thought we'd see it is like, well, if you don't freeze it, which you guys don't have freeze breath or anything, then it's just going to pour apart. You know when you like melt two things and then put them together, you can pull them apart real easy because it's still melty. That's just- Well, it's like- And plus all of the cables are breaking. You can't connect just one back up and expect it will hold the bridge. Does what I mean? Like it has to hold up the weight of a bridge and it has to do more than it normally did because there's so many other cables that are broken. And that's the thing is you have, it won't work in principle and then the whole problem the bridge is currently having is that they're all snapping anyway. Meaning reconnecting one is fucking not going to do anything. You have all that put together and then he notices like some other things are happening, some other people in trouble and just flies off and the camera remains on the cable he just sealed and it just breaks. Like- Yep. Okay. I thought that's going to be addressed in some degrees. Like, oh man, we're actually not doing so good. Like, I actually had no idea what to do. It's like, no, they're just breaks and then there's never talked about again. They're saved them all, I guess. Some people saying you can't weld cables together like that. It's like, I don't even, like I said, I don't know what the fuck's going on in this scene. No. Yeah. And then the whole bridge begins to fall but he grabs one broken cable on the bottom and lifts it all the way back up to where it's supposed to be. He doesn't seal them, he just holds it there and apparently that keeps the entire bridge up. Wow. Yeah. Amazing. Like, the bridge is about to like fall into the water but he holds up one cable. It's like, okay, good. Why isn't it breaking at any of the points? It's like, shut up. Shut up. And they do a very funny meme. Shazam is like, we have to keep this bridge from collapsing, hard cut to news report. The Ben Franklin bridge has collapsed. First draft, first draft joke. We need to do this. Oh, we didn't hard cut. What's weird is Freddie is talking to them about how he's not a huge fan of the Philadelphia fiascos is the name they've been given right now. And as he's talking, it cuts to the dad watching on TV and he's like, have you ever noticed? And he stops and he goes, I need to check on the kids and the kids walk in and they're just like, hey dad, whatever. And it's like, what did he notice? Tell me, you never find out. I'm guessing- That's a good question now. Whenever the Philadelphia fiascos are on the news, that's just right after the kids all have to leave for some reason or whatever. Well, it's the thing, if you had to go for two years, you would have been able to, the parents should have found out by now. The kids are terrible at keeping this, should have secreted it. Yeah, they should. They're bad at keeping it a secret in the first one. There's several instances where you just have Freddie talking to Shazam, like out in the open with people visibly recording it on their phones. Yeah. No, they don't. I feel like the film doesn't even remember that that was the case. Bell even remembered that that was the case in the first film. They remember he met Superman though. Oh yeah, that's right. What do the parents think about that? But like he actually met Superman at school. Wow, you met that psychopath who genocides his own people? Yeah, that's right. Did you bump into one of the more past Batman toys? Batman, the guy who branded people who got executed in prison because he branded them and also kills a bunch of people. I don't think I approve of this role model, dear. Kind of insane. Yeah, I guess it's like a bat. Friends, I had to step away briefly. Did we talk about how inappropriate their behavior during the bridge scene is? Well, there's really happy and chill and goofy. Yeah, exactly. And that people are afraid for their lives and they're like cracking jokes and doing kidnaps kittens. So the thing is, it's so funny. This is just in line with all the other shitty superhero movies where I would normally complain. But the thing this film gets as a shield every once in a while is the fact that their children or at least some of them are children. Well, that's what I told myself. And in hindsight, I give the movie entirely too much credit. I thought that maybe this is something that we set up at the beginning is that they're not actually very mature about this. And then maybe they'd have to learn to be later, but they don't. Yeah, you're right. This one struggles more, though, because they're all older, like Mary's an adult, Billy's 17. So not like that young. And Freddy's probably like, I think Freddy is like 16 or something. They're not that young, or at least a few years old. I think Billy is like very close to 18 and Freddy's a month younger than him. Right. So he, yeah, exactly. So then Mary's a few years older than both of them. Very dearly, yeah. The three on the team. And this is the thing, Billy, Shazam, he comes across like a fucking eight year old sometimes. Yeah, when he's not, when he's just Billy, he's actually surprisingly mature, actually. Like he's he's pretty, pretty on top of it and like wants to resolve problems and sort of grapple with the things that he needs to deal with. I mean, it was pretty well exemplified by that shot, like in the trailer where it's like after the scene that's meant to be like a really heartfelt scene later in the film. And then when he turns back into like Shazam, Zach really by doing like a stupid face. I don't get it. I don't get why they're so different. Yeah. Wisdom of Solomon going to the wrong body. I want to change you, Fringy. That kind of power, it changes a boy. So you find out they have a layer in the form of the rock fraternity, which they do mention in the first film is going to happen. And it's got like loads of decorations and bullshit all over the walls and stuff they've done over the two years, which to me is just like, yeah. You've even like, but silly clothes on all the seven deadly sins, which amazing to see that they were there considering the sort of stakes of them from the first film are completely forgotten in this one. If you remember, right, you need the strength of like the wizard to keep them sealed. And then the wizard is gone. And so it's just Shazam. And then that guy like broke them out somehow. I can't remember how he did it in the first film. Was it with the staff? It was with the eye, wasn't it? Yeah, he uses the eye power. He comes back and gets the eye power. And then that breaks them out. Yeah, it breaks them out. I think we should have that behind like glass or something. Somebody in chat has pointed out, how do they have cable in the rock of eternity? That's a good point. So apparently they were, they have the know-how to like rig up cable television in this different realm or something connected through. There's a very, very, very long extension cord leading out one of the doors and they've hooked it up illegally to some poor man's setup. And that's how they're doing it. And someone somewhere in the world is just having their cable drop out every five minutes because of this tampering. I don't know about the cable, but they actually have a shot where they show that there's like a gas generator, which first of all, those things are incredibly loud. And it's just kind of like spewing, you know, just stank it all up. But they at least thought, maybe we should try to explain the electricity. Does that put the film needs as an explanation? Yeah. Yeah, so that's why it isn't a dimensional cable. That's fear that released the seven sins then. Is that there in the place? Or is it gone? What's the deal here with that? I assume it's gone. We're going to repost that. Yeah. It's just crazy to me that if anyone was to grab it, they get the power of the seven deadly sins and then they can, I don't know, do things. Yeah. Whatever. That was a thing. It's probably a little bit. It's a little bit weird that you would be so chill and casual with like the stone figures of the things that nearly killed you. Like might be interesting if one of them actually had a little bit of a trauma relating to that whole incident. Or if any one of them had any trauma at all relating to the crazy perilous stuff that they've got going on. But no, they're like incredibly chill about this dangerous life that they're leading. So you see on the TV, Philly Fiasco destroyed bridge. Why on earth do they think they destroyed it? I don't know. It was clearly being destroyed before. There were newscasts and everything. That's how they learned about it. There were reports. Yes, exactly. If they saved 166 people, can you imagine the public outcry? Like what the fuck? They did not destroy the bridge. They saved everyone's lives. Yeah, the bridge was already destroyed anyway. All the people would come out, yeah, they saved me from the thing. They didn't destroy the bridge. But they were there because the bridge was breaking. What are you doing? I hate to go this direction. The state of journalism in this city. It's not just slander at that point, like, blaming that on a new report. I think it is. Yes. Probably. And if it's imprint, it's liable. Especially because I'm sure the bridge, do we get any other explanation for why the bridge collapses other than it just is a shit bridge? It just looks like there was some kind of car accident and it's broke something so badly. Those things do not go down as easily or as commonly as that at all. It just looks like something crashed into it a little bit or a little hard, whatever. And just like, yeah, this is going to break everything. Pretty big ask movie to get me to think that this one car crash, which doesn't even look that really that bad, was able to take down the whole bridge. A lot of films seem to think that like, it's like a papier-mache or something that like this massive suspension bridge is like, which is just ready to go at a moment. It's all like bridges are actually incredibly sturdy. Yeah, you'd have to remove a lot of these cables for it to actually collapse away. I mean, these sorts of things are designed with like tons of redundancies. Oh, yeah, you have to imagine they wouldn't. But whatever, it's for our action set piece. Look, the bridge and then ha ha, funny joke. They're pretty irresponsible or something. I guess. Yeah, sure. I don't really respond to how they saved all these people. He says, like when seeing it, he goes, we saved countless lives. And then she goes, 162. It's countable. I was like, shut up. Yeah, this is just like. That's just 100% true people who are alive now, thanks to you, who may not have been. Yeah, this is just something that a cat says. Exactly. I was just like, he's reacting to being told they destroyed the bridge. That's the important part. But she's just like, actually it is countable. Actually, it is countable. It's very much an up actually sort of statement. Like, how about we don't do it? Maybe it isn't countable. Maybe he's referring to all the future lives that have been saved because all of those 162 people are now alive. How about that? That's right. And the impact. And the immeasurable impact that their loss would have meant to their families or whatever. Yeah, checkmate. Yeah. Why don't you read that in your book? Yeah, look at me, I can read. What was she reading? Was she reading like a chemistry book? Organic chemistry is what she's reading. See, she's smart. She's reading the chemistry book. Well, the reason I can read in that is that she is going to reveal soon that she wants to go to college, right? She can count. Which is interesting because we do nothing in terms of like figuring out what Billy wants to do with his life as an adult, which is fast approaching. I think that the point is that he doesn't have any plans. Like that he needs to. It's almost like he hasn't even thought at all. Like there's no ideas to entertain at all. Which seems odd because, I mean, he does go to school, right? And he does like study and have classes he attends. Theoretically. His schooling is just irrelevant to him. It was irrelevant in the first film, but it's it's even more so here. So you got, where's Eugene? And he says, where he always is, mapping doors. But turns out Eugene has been going through each of the mystery doors in the mystery door room to just mark what they are and where they go. And I was just thinking to myself like, this got to be insane worlds in there with all kinds of crazy atmospheres and rules, realities, all kinds of different things. I was just like, is it safe for this little kid to just be going in and out of them? And when Shazam comes in there, he gets blown out of one of them and he says, don't go in that one. It's actual nightmare fuel. And it's like, what would have happened if he went in there and then didn't come out though? What does that look like? It was like, hey, where's that guy? Should probably go in twos or something or, you know, don't close the door or you know, some kind of contingency installed that you can get some amount of supervision right back out. The older ones should accompany the younger ones if they're like planning on going on some adventure. Yeah, this is like one of those things you don't do alone. Yeah. The door is kind of weird. How irresponsible they are. Oh, anyway, it cuts to Shazam. The reason he wanted to know is he's trying to collect them all up because he's like, all right, big day, big bridge. Marys, pay attention, please. It's like, Shazam has a character played by Zachary Levi just annoys me, I guess. I just call it, I never believe it. It always comes across as he's like trying to entertain children sort of thing. So she says, organic cam is my meditation. And he said, said nobody with friends because I'd have friends if I went to college. Okay. They don't have friends in other places. They don't make friends. They don't have any friends anywhere else. We all went to college together by the way, chat. And then, I think Eugene says... Stop crowding, I see. I just like that you say that you can't make friends anywhere else as a Tinder spam bot shows up in the chat. Happy friend. Play the bot. Yeah, so Eugene just says, I got to test the slime for toxicity. I'm starting to tingle. So when he came out of the nightmare fuel place, he just got covered in slime and decided to just sit down and talk with everybody instead of having a shower or anything. Kind of weird. Yeah, because that's what we would do. That's what people would do. So that's weird. And then Pedro says, oh, Philly's game just came on. So I'm gonna go watch baseball. Gonna go ogle the shortstop if you know what I mean. I mean, that's what I don't get about that line. I was like, does he actually like baseball or does he use baseball as his excuse to go do gay things? What does that even mean? I'm gonna go do gay things. And then, I forget the names of these characters. The youngest one, little girl. She says, I should probably return this kitten. Yeah, you should. Yeah, you probably should. So that's cool. Catnapping's bad. Yeah, that's pretty bad. I think it's somebody's cat. Yeah, like. She just took the cat. It's kittens, no less. Yeah. He just took the cat. Because there's like three of them that they wouldn't miss one of them. Just, yeah, it's just, what else can you say about it? It's just like, man, you shouldn't do that. Yeah, but isn't it really funny though? Yeah, see, gotcha, checkmate. So then we get a really weird conversation, just like the rest of this movie where people don't talk to each other properly. He's like. Oh, here we go. He's the only guy, Mary left, and he says, oh, if you say you have to work, and she says, I have to work. And he goes, why do you even have a job? Wonder Woman doesn't have a job. She's like an archeologist, right? No, I guess he doesn't know that. I mean, she doesn't have a job. That she doesn't. And it's just like, that's strange, but okay. But also it's not a very meaningful thing to say. Like Wonder Woman is a God. Like this is just a person, you know? She has just a real last life. She's not, because Wonder Woman is Wonder Woman. So you can at least say that that is her primary identity. This lady had a whole life before she became a Shazam person. Wonder Woman is basically immortal. She lives for like thousands of years, whereas it's not the case for her. Then you get some, because Freddie earlier said he wanted to go fly solo for a bit, right? And so then you have this line. Mary says, just stop, Billy. You're holding on too tight, just because Freddie wants to go fly solo for 10 minutes doesn't mean he's going to leave you like. What, now, what are your, your, your discord's cutting out there? No, it wasn't. For me. Your discord's cutting out, rags. Yeah. Here we go again. Bye rags. It was nice knowing you. Hello? Is he going to talk over us this whole time? Yes, he is. This has happened many times. Yep. You don't wait for him to go boo-doo. I'm assuming it'll happen at some point, right? Yeah, well, it's just like we've been working into another dimension. We're all talking rags. Oh, there you go. He'll be back. Don't worry. Whoa, okay. How are we doing rags? You there? Hello? All right, Singapore. Let's go. Let's go. Singapore is a new trend. As part of the new DLC. Dear Lord. All I heard was Singapore is part of the new DLC, which is good. It's what I had for two. Yeah, Mario Kart 8 has the new DLC and it's got like Singapore as one of the courses because I got the tour maps, like Mario Kart Tour is where they're in real like world cities. So they've got like Berlin, Sydney, all sorts. But I've also added a new one called Yoshi's Island. It's a new, totally original new map for Mario Kart 8 and it's really cool. It's very quaint. This has been a very good pass. There's rags you there yet? I am here. Yeah, are you back? Okay, cool. Well, anyways, getting off of the really fun and awesome Mario Kart 8 back to the really terrible Shazam movie. Yes, so he said about the job thing and her response is stop, like basically that he feels a little bit too controlling, which is one thing you could say, but instead they have to say, you're holding on too tight just because Freddy wants to fly solo for 10 minutes doesn't mean he's gonna leave you like your mom did. Thanks for explaining that one of the themes of the film. I legit was like, what the fuck? Like, well, it just comes out of nowhere, but it's like, oh, that's about 25, 30% of what you're gonna get for that is like a theme in this film. Just that one like line of dialogue. Phrase rather harshly, I would say. He's fucked up. He's basically like, if anything, his big fault right now is he wants to spend loads of time with you. Fuck him, I guess. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, it's a, yeah. It's not a very nice thing to say. It was, you were insecure because your mom left you. Thanks dude. The movie tries to make it a thing that he's controlling, but you don't really get that vibe. You seem like he's like, oh, come on guys, let's all, you know, work together. He just wants to hang out with him, but they don't want her. No. So yeah. He is kind of annoying. Beyond surprising, but none of the characters actually accept that line for what it is. He instead just can keep moving. And she says, all that me going to college means I'm abandoning the family. And he goes, oh, college again. And she says, you turn 18 in five months. So that's how old he is then. And there you go. Because they're not going to kick me out. They didn't kick you out. And she says, Victor and Rosa are saints because you're about to age out of the foster system. Just like I did. And you know, I'm still there. And he's like, yeah, I know how it works. And she goes, do you, Victor and Rosa can only barely pay rent and the state no longer sends checks to feed or house me and soon they won't for you. And I was just thinking to myself like, holy fuck. Victor and Rosa are like taking care of all these kids and they don't get support from the government once they hit a certain age. And he's got like the testicles right now at age 17 to be like, you don't need a job. Like, dude. Yeah. I'm pretty sure that Billy is smart enough to understand the notion of like that you need income to pay bills. Yeah. Yeah, those two barely paid for everything. And what we find out as well is that they buy the house later on in this episode. That's how I see this shit. All episodes of this giant show. So yeah, that's a reality. She's trying to explain why she has a job. And then she says, I don't care if Wonder Woman has a job. I want to contribute. Everyone on earth, we have to get a job or leave home. Nothing lasts forever. And I remember thinking about like, I wonder if the film agrees or disagrees with that said to it. I'm not even sure. Yeah. Is this going to play into like a theme later on about something or is it not? Kind of like just saying I want to contribute regardless. I was like, that's good. Yeah. Yeah. It'd be nice if you weren't so mean to know about it. The problem is I don't even think she realized. The writer didn't realize that was me. The writer was probably just like, you're insecure about your mom. Rip. Like, oh. You're insecure about your mom's protection. Yeah. Abandon you when you were like five years old. Yeah. You're insecure about that. Just get over it, you little shit. Yeah. Well, it painted the entire, sorry. Go ahead. No, go ahead. Well, it painted the entire scene for me because as soon as she said like, oh, she's not going to abandon you like your mom. And then she starts talking about how, oh, well, you know, they can barely pay rent and you know, you're about to turn 18. It was coming. I just remember in that scene, it was coming off like, are you trying to like, are you trying to like stoke the psychological flames that you clearly already see are there? Are you a secret demon? Yeah. Are you trying to give them a panic attack right now? Are you trying to, I don't know. It was, it read as like, I can see every insecurity you have and I'm going to play directly into them. And I think it is because of that initial mum line. It was, it was, it left a bad taste. It really did. It makes you feel like they, like she doesn't, doesn't actually like Billie like at all. It's like, you're just being annoying this whole time. We don't actually, I don't want you around basically. You lazy shit. Well, and if he was more of an actual adult or even close to the age he's supposed to be, he would have fucking caught on and been like, hey, like back off. Like, what the hell was that? But no, he's like, well, just you're right. Wonder Woman does never drop a mouth. It just comes across like the writer was worried you'd forget that that's sort of part of his character. So he had to make it explicit when that should just be the subtext. Yeah, he could have just left it at like, he's just because he wants to fly solo doesn't mean he's going to abandon you. Period. That could have been it. And we would have, you know, inferred the rest. But I think the writer was worried we forgot. Even though they brought it up earlier in this movie, didn't they? In the diatrous office or whatever it was. Yep. Idiotrition, whatever. He's saying nothing lasts forever. That's going to come up a few times here and there. Well, he says it's called the Rock of Eternity. So some things last forever. Oh, good one. Eternity, I know what that word means. So this is the part of the movie that I think everyone is like, what? Especially if you haven't seen like the trailers where he pops at it, but you hear someone in a prison cell where the Helen Mirren and the other, well, there's only the two of them right now, actually. It was my photo of them. Continuities, you understand what the fuck's happening. Back to their plot line. They walk up to a prison cell. There's someone in there who says, just leave me to die. And she says, we come bearing gifts. And he gets up and it's the wizard from the first movie. It's the wizard. Oh my God, how are you here? How are you alive? You might have thought he disintegrated, but have I got news for you? I learned all about this from a certain Star Wars movie, okay, that disintegration don't mean shit. No one's ever really gone. He is not dead. Somehow the wizard lives. And I may as well skip to it, Alex. It's just so funny. One of the characters at one point in this film is like, wait, aren't you supposed to be dead? Like, I think everyone thought you were dead. He goes, no, I just went to a different realm. Oh, that's how disintegration works. Okay. Well, that's not a big deal at all. Yeah, cause you could just go from realm to realm. So it's not even a somehow he returbed. They've record it so that he didn't die at all. He just teleported, but in a way that turned him to ash. Apparently when he disintegrated, it's like, oh, I just disintegrated in like that room, but I'm here in this prison again. I just like to think that he sees us like, that's how I travel. I just go to ash and it just looks really scary to everyone. Totally fine, don't worry about it. It's like, oh, okay. And he's like, this realm was sealed off from magic. And then Halmyrin, I don't know, man, I think it's the dialogue. It could be the performance, I don't know. But she says, yes, after you ripped it from our father's very core, from every God in the realm, from me. Do you not remember what you took from me? What my particular power was? The power of elements? I was just like, oh God, kill me. Just kill me, I can't take it. Oh, why would you write it like that? Okay, moving. This is what we're doing. Leave me alone, why are you doing this to me? Why can't you just be normal, a normal God? You be a normal God, not a cringe God. And does he make sense like that? The powers of cringe. Why don't I remind you what you did to me, so that people know what you did to me? Okay, okay. How will they know unless I tell you now? Here are my powers, whoa! It is the most exposition discussion ever. They don't sound at all like they're saying things they're actually interested in. The wizard responds to all of that bullshit with, no, I cast a barrier to prevent your kind from getting to the human realm. The only way that would be possible is if, and then Lucy Liu goes, someone broke this and she holds a fucking stand, it's like, oh God. Why did you write this so bad? It's like she was excited to finally drop this on him. I was like, oh, he's gonna ask any moment now. Yeah, he's about to ask about it. Here I go, here's my moment. And I was like, oh, I got it. He's like, how, where is the champion? And then you just think like, why didn't you tell Shazam? That staff is incredibly important to the point where the whole of Earth would be destroyed if it breaks. Should you break it? Yeah. Man, I'm sure glad we don't have any other of these items lying around that we don't know about. Lucky, that's only the one. Shazam three. No, no, no. That's not gonna happen. Wrath of the Titans or whatever. It's just no way. There was no way anyway. Like, how much money do you think this film would have to make for them to make a third one? Doot, doot, doot. Not too much. Kind of looking budget. For them to get. I was thinking like, would a billion even be enough because there's DC James Gunn stuff? He'd be like, eh, it's good. It's really good, but no, we're moving on. If it made two billion, he'd be like, okay, yeah, we gotta make another one. Like that way, yes. Yeah. So is the metric that it has to make 2.5 times its production budget to break even? Well, I'm not interested in that. I'm just thinking how much do you think it would have to make for people like James Gunn and the others in charge to think, yes, we'll make a third one? A shitillion dollars? It would be a lot, yeah. It would have to be a whole bunch. And even then a billion is just, that's already pushing it. I think if it was a billion, they'd be like, well, we'll use the benefits of that to generate our new stories. I don't think a billion would be enough for them to be like, oh yes, the IP of Shazam on its own is enough to continue, you know? I don't know, maybe. Wait, what? So for your question, how much do you think this movie would have to make for James Gunn at ALT to conclude that we should make a Shazam 3? The problem is that I don't know that there's like, I almost wonder if there's no real amount of money that a film could make that's even remotely reasonable that would sort of offset the amount of damage that seems to just sort of pervade like the DC brand. Cause this is gonna be like the fourth one in a row that has not like done very well at the box office. Birds of Prey didn't do very well. The Suicide Squad didn't do very well, but that was simultaneous release. One Woman 1984 was not received very well at all. That film was just broadly considered a clown movie. And of course this one's not doing very well either. And I imagine even looking forward, I don't know how much money Flash makes. I don't even know if like the Flash making a billion dollars would be enough for them to go, oh, let's scrap our plans and then, you know, keep making these things. I'm not sure. Maybe if it made like a billion dollars. I don't think a billion would be enough, but I think two billion would be. So I'm not sure where the line would. Two billion would probably be enough. Cause it was two billion would be one of the highest grossing films like of all time. Yeah, and then they'd be like, holy shit, people like Shazam. I guess. Of course, we live in the real world rather than make, believe, fantasy land. This film might not even make like 200 million dollars. I can't be so fucking funny if it doesn't, though. It would be. I mean, it's the same as if, you know, Ant-Man doesn't crack 500 million, which it looks like it won't. And then again, looking forward at the rest of the year, how well does the Flash do? You see, you hear the thing that Tom Cruise apparently asked to watch and loved it. What a weird headline to read. Tom Cruise specifically wanted to see the Flash watched it and liked it. Oh, well, no. That was a real tweet. I thought it was a meme tweet that I saw. I think that was from a Hollywood reporter that he asked to see it and he loved it so much, he called up the director, basically said that he loved it. But why? I need to know what are the superhero movies Tom Cruise likes. But I don't know what we're dealing with, you know. Imagine he said like the only other what I like is Harley Quinn's Birds of Prey. He like, okay. Oh. He's, he's standing by the mummy and stuff like that. Yeah, yeah. I sure was gold. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know how much money it needs to make a hell of a lot more than it's going to. Yes. But yeah, apparently the only person that can repair the two pieces of the staff are the wizards. He has to hold the two parts and shout Shazam. So they get him to do that with telekinesis and the mind chaos thing, like done, done, done. But before they leave, he grabs a hold of the staff so hard, like bigs his nail into it so he gets pretty hard splinter. You okay? Yeah, I just remember what happens with that splinter. It goes somewhere I don't like. No, it's not a great place to have a splinter. No. It's ouchy. It's a relatable ouchy. So you may be thinking, well, what's he gonna be able to do with that? They're just gonna kill him now, right? They've got everything they need out of him. No, they don't kill him. And so it's on you as the audience member at that point, I would say, to try and think and infer why they might not kill him. And I think some people might say, well, they might need him in future for anything that happens with the staff or maybe they wanna ask him questions about stuff in future or that, you know, it's just one of those prisoners maybe you hang on to especially because he can't do anything from within that cell and it's like, maybe, but then that gets thrown out the window because the next interaction they have with him is they're gonna kill him. Yeah, right? Also, I guess that mind control isn't permanent. No, that's a good point. I feel like it should just be permanent. It wears off. Yeah, I guess a different kind of thing. Well, why wouldn't you just get full control over him? Yeah, that's a great point. Why do we? Well, he's a wizard, so he can... Yeah, that's the only thing that like, you know... So you tend to play with him because he's a wizard? Yeah, I guess. He's a little bit, he's got some stronger brain than the average guy, I guess. His brain's got the strongest sort of temporary on Freddy as well. I meant you were faster with the joke. Oh, you're right. It is on the temporary on Freddy. I think it's just a different power, and she's just an idiot. Yeah, it seems like... That seems the most likely. She doesn't have a mastery of her powers that much. So then we have awkward high school scene where Freddy bumps into random girl and they have very awkward and stilted ban to try and generate like a relationship super fast because again, we've already done like a third of their whole interactions. Go, go, go. And then the bullies turn up and they're like, hey, new girl, if you need anything, wear your guys. What would you say they're doing in that moment, guys? Generally speaking? Assault. No, not to... Wait, am I talking to her or...? This is actually leading somewhere. What do you think they're doing in relation to the girl? They're just trying to like, I don't know, schmooze her up a bit. I would say they kind of, I guess... They'd be in a bit horny, yeah, they're like, hey, hey, cool, hot, new girl, we're the guys, you probably... Simping, yeah, that's fair enough. This is later described as they were planning to like, beat her up. Wait, what? So to make sense of this, this is when they talk to her again and she says, you know, Freddy, you're like a hero, you stop them, you knew what they were gonna do to me and you still like stood up for me. I thought she said that he knew what they were going to do to him for saying that and he still did it. She, I could have sworn, maybe I misheard it, but the... I think I'm pretty sure that she was basically saying, you knew that by making fun of them that they were gonna like beat you up, but you still did it anyway. Well, so part of what she mentions is like, he was protective of her, but I don't think that makes any sense. No. I still don't think it's like working, but I'm pretty sure that's what she said. Well, my point is just that he wasn't protecting her from shit. Like he was just... Yes, exactly. In that scene, he's just being an asshole to them because to be fair, they're asking for him. Well, of course I are jerks, but yeah, she doesn't know that yet. They are jerks, but they hadn't actually done anything yet and he decides, so they just say, hey, how's it going, new girl? We're here and we're your guys. Maybe to help you understand more again, is she says she was going to kill them. Oh, later on she does, yeah, which she's been saying. Well, that's true. Why doesn't she, she says it later in the film, no, she says it in that same scene that she was going to kill them and that Freddie protected her or whatever, so she didn't need to. Like basically she said, just give me a sec, she says you did all that, but you didn't need to because I was going to rearrange their organs anyway. That was later in the film. I thought that was later in the film, yeah. No, that's once they, it's past the dragon pot, same scene. Where do you think this happened? The scene when they're talking on the rooftop or something? No, no, this is after the dragon. Oh, okay. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, now I know what you're talking about. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got you. Because the whole idea is like, he's like, oh, you saved us and she's like, you saved me from, yeah, that was it, I was right. She said, you saved me from bullies. I thought you were talking about the conversation that they had right after he had confronted the bullies. No, I literally said this way later in the film when she's talking about the contextualizing what happened with the bullies and she did say, you're the one that protected me from the bullies, which is like not even moving through. Yes, the reason why I'm getting confused is because the line you said was the one that they had at the school, where she said you knew that they were gonna like, you know, beat you up and you did it anyway. That was at the school. This is why I'm confused. I heard the same thing, so I got confused as well. Yeah, this whole time I was talking about the dragon scene. The point I'm getting at is that this is mutual. This problem is that you said that line from that scene, which is where I got confused. What I'm trying to highlight is this is mutual confusion. What I'm trying to highlight is that she was criticizing him for being too protective of people who were gonna beat her up with what was gonna happen. That's my whole point. Yeah, no, I agree with that. But still, mutual confusion here. You were partially responsible for this. Well, but I was right. She does contextualize it as they were gonna bully her. No, I know that she, I know, okay, sure. I wasn't talking about any specific lines, just the notion that they were gonna hear. I didn't, do you literally read out the very specific line and then that was where I thought it was supposed to be? No, I didn't read any of these. I don't have any of these written down. That's why I was guessing. All I know, that's why I just got remembered is the reason that the bullying line comes up is because she says, I protected you from bullies in this realm. You protected me from bullies in your realm. Which doesn't make any sense. They weren't bullying her. No, I know that weren't bullying her. I agree with that. But still, fudged references, confusion all around. It's cool. Oh my goodness. Moving on. No, no, same scene. So my big criticism with that is that she planned to rearrange their organs, which will kill you. I would imagine there's not gonna be much ways you can do that, which would still save your life. She's gonna fuck them really hard. Yeah, yeah. All because they said, if you need anything, we're here. We're here. You fuckers, I'm gonna kill you. Yeah, you might be like, yeah, but they mean bullies. They've beaten them up before. It's like, I don't fucking know that that means they should be executed. Yeah. Well, it's pretty, we might be jumping the gun, but I do not like how much this film tries to bail this character out for like moral culpability for a lot of the things that she does. It reminds me of a, what's her name from Black Widow? Helena? Helena? Yeah, Helena. Oh, the mum, right? Yeah, she's, nobody ever addresses the thing, the big elephant of the room, how much of a horrible piss you want to leave. We'll move on. And it's kind of weird as well, because later in the film, she's like, oh no, bad things happening to people. It's like, apparently you would totally chill with doing that to kids. Like, I don't understand. Helena is new Black Widow. I'm talking about the mum. Whatever her name was. I forget what her name was. Yeah, someone in chat right now. Eventually. The movie does not. You don't remember Black Widow? Jane or something. I don't know. For some reason, I was going with Helena. Melina? Melina. Melina, yeah. Oh, yeah, I remember now because it was like Mortal Kombat. That's what I kept thinking when I was editing. Oh, there you go. I was thinking of a horrible, monstrous creature. Yeah, yeah. That's actually really suitable. Oh, yeah, right. I was mixed up with Katana. Never mind. Well, that makes sense because she's a botched clone of Katana, right? Win, alone, yeah. With Takatan, DNA. See, I know my Mortal Kombat slightly. Mortal Kombat 2, hopefully without the OC, Johnny Cage, main character, and bringing back Kano. Yeah, and I would even, as far as just just having back. They're like, weren't you dead? And he's just like, shut up. And then they, you know, they gave him the laser eye. All right, that's the excuse to give him the actual prosthetic laser eye. Yeah. And then bring in, oh wait, Kabal's dead. They killed him. Damn. Yeah, that was such a fan. Nothing in Mortal Kombat. Pringy. They alluded to this idea that they could like return or something. Well, they did with because behind original Sub-Zero, they'll probably bring him back as Noob Saibot and then put in like sort of mainline, regular, long-standing Sub-Zero. That was like the best part of the movie was Scorpion versus Sub-Zero. And then they had to put their OC character into the fight as well. Nobody wanted him there. I just wanted to see Scorpion in Sub-Zero fight. But did you have a list of the generic action man characters? Because there's so many of them. Yeah, there are a lot of them. Unfortunately, Chris Pratt's got like a few of those pinned down just for himself. Yes, he does. Yeah. And did you hear that they're not certain if Scorpion is going to return for Mortal Kombat 2? Really? They're not going to put back? Scorpion is the icon of the franchise. How do you not have Scorpion back for Mortal Kombat 2? The same way you have an OC as the main character in Mortal Kombat 1 with incompetence. You know, that is definitely like that was before they were ready to fully embrace video games. If that may have come out like that entered production today, there wouldn't have been that OC character. It would have been just the video game characters. And they wouldn't have tried to come out. Isn't it crazy that that's a thought, though? That they thought, you know what, people? We're going to bank on this movie selling because it's Mortal Kombat. However, we're not confident enough in that. So instead, the better move is to have the protagonist be this lame, super generic OC. That's the reason why Sonic the Hedgehog was like a crazy monstrosity thing instead of just being Sonic the Hedgehog. It's because even though they know the name, it's like, yeah, but we can't have like a blue hedgehog like running around. Like that'd be silly. We need to make him look like he's kind of plausible as like a creature. We need to make him look like a monster. Yeah. Well, hey, yeah, exactly. Like a failed genetic experiment. With human teeth. People love that. 95% of Molina is hot. That's fair. Definitely can't go wrong on that one. That is true. Do you remember in MKX where they gave her a human lips over her teeth just so they could do that one scene? No. Yeah, actually. Yeah, that's right. And then in Mortal Kombat 11, they were like, no, just give her the full tar cart and like crazy looking sort of mouth. Yeah. So for those not aware, so in Mortal Kombat 10. You don't need to talk about it. You don't need to like go into it's gross. OK, OK, I don't. I will not go into it if the panel does not want to go into it. I mean, it really opposed to it. So if this bugs him, we don't have to, you know, talk. It does bug me. Yeah, it bugs me a lot, actually. That I see what you did there. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, back to the stupid movie. So when they say that we can do anything, he says, yeah, narcissistic personality disorder, chlamydia, they've got it all. I thought it was like a line nine to fight against bullies. Where have you gone? See, I had forgotten that they were the bullies from the first movie. So I thought, like, well, that was really rude. They didn't do anything yet. They're the comical, crazy bullies that pick on crippled children. Yes. Yeah. Which is why, you know, the line. Park their big pickup truck in front on the curb of the school. Yeah, that's right. Even though it's probably going to get towed. Immediately towed and they'll shoot out for it. Yeah. So I just thought, wow, like they just said, hey, new girl, like, like you should be friends with us. And he's like, you have chlamydia and you're a narcissist. I was like, see, that's why as a Shazam superfan, I saw the first one again. So I knew how well constructed this story beat was and you were suffering sitting there, not knowing. Especially if they're going to have her being ready to like destroy them and kill them with their magic powers, you know, I feel like they could have made them more shitty in this. I think they thought it was a funny joke, like, ha, ha, funny, funny. She's kind of like not familiar with, you know, the customs of like society or something. Is that what they were doing? I think it was meant to be like kind of almost a fish out of water thing that she's like an ancient god. So she's not aware that rearranging some of these organs because they were kind of like a pompous jerk was like that that might be a little bit excessive. Well, she did say like I wouldn't have needed you to do anything because I was going to rearrange the organs, meaning she knew it would at least stop them. I assume she knows that we killed them, though. I mean, you would be considering that he knows that we're in the film that like the monsters just being out there and attacking people is imperil, like is endangering their lives. Like she she's not like an idiot, right? She understands like. Well, yeah, but I didn't have that interpretation anyway. I didn't think that's what they were trying to tell us. I thought that he was literally killing them hence. Hence my like concerns about her as a character, right? She doesn't actually know at that point that they're really terrible bullies. They just kind of rather aggressively said hi to her. That's true. They did. And that's the thing. Someone would be like, but they and it's like, no, that is after. But we can talk about it now. They punch him in the in the good old belly and then they I was going to say break, but they bend it. Is is crutch that it's not not usable. And it's just like, holy fuck, you guys, like it's just like the first movie where you're just like, man, this aggressive beating up of a crippled kid. It's just like, that would that would earn you so much like disdain school. I don't know how anybody would hate you. Everybody would hate them. You're picking on the crippled kid. The 40 year old 50 year old man who wrote this, he thinks that like everyone wants to pick on the crippled kid. Like if someone's crippled, that means that everyone in the school will hate them instead of them like actually getting a lot of social credit for that in a way. Like everyone's going to look out for him. What do you generally the kind of people who get bullied? It's often people with like mental like like, you know, autism or something. They usually get bullied at school, not crippled people. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, as you can't see their disability, anybody recording that on their phones and then it goes up to the Internet, how serious people take this shit would be that the person recording it would get in trouble to like why the fuck didn't you do anything? And it's like, oh, shit, like people don't like this shit. So it's just annoying to see that that's happening. And then it's like, oh, a teacher just saw it all or principal. I don't think we have to find out his job, teacher. Yeah, I think so. We'll go with that. He's like the cool teacher. Yeah, the teachers, the teacher comes in and he sees this happening and they will go, oh, shit. You know, and they move the they were going to put him in a trash can. They move that back. And then he's like, and then it's like, oh, you know, everything's fine. Don't don't you worry about it. And they like leave. And then Freddie, like, I don't know if he high fives. Most of the time he's like, oh, thanks so much. It's like, hello, teacher. You just saw him get beaten and then they broke. Yeah, like very significant support. Do something. And this is like, no, I did something. I broke it up. It's fine. Yeah, just let him go. I was like destroyed his property. You know, like it might might require a little bit more like least get attention, please. From breaking his steering talking to anything. Just like anything. No, he did it. It's fine. It's like, oh, maybe the maybe the principles in on it. Maybe he's cool. Teja, I hope that you don't die lighter in this movie. I would be unfortunate because that's our way of being a cool dude, apparently. Well, does he die? As you watch that movie, I don't remember that. You know, it's not that long away. That theoretical. Yeah, it's very sad for you. Right. No, I remember. OK, yeah, you're right. That maybe happened. Well, maybe we'll find out whether that happened in a minute or two. So they have more banter and then the bullies just throw a football at his head and he falls to the ground. And it looks like kind of painful, but then it just like camera just sits on and he's like, ah, I met a girl. Hey, I don't know. We see the ball. He never ends. No, that's it for the bullies. They've done their job. So then the way they don't they don't even do like for that. They don't even do like a weird like payoff where they get like, I don't know, where demon shits on them or whatever. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah, we're we're we're something like you expect kind of like in the first movie. Yeah, like like Shazam saved the truck and dropped it. And then they come up and. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You expect to maybe pop up in the third act screaming as a minotaur is about to kill them and then they get saved, you know, that sort of thing. Oh, something. Yeah. But then Freddie bends his leg backwards. Like, yeah, I see how it feels. No, that's not the Zack Snyder version. Too dark. Yeah, Zack Snyder. So the wizard gets the splinter out of his finger and uses it to cast a spell. And this is the thing, right? Let's just pretend the all he can do with the splinter is contact one person. I don't know what else he could do with it. Seriously, up to the writer. But we know he can contact someone to talk to. And you might be thinking, well, Shazam, right? That's the one he's got to talk to. That's the one he needs to talk to. He's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, that sounds like a good idea. But do you know who he he asks to speak to? Is go find me the one who did this. And what he's referring to is breaking the staff. But that could be a couple people. Right. Yeah, because what what if he didn't know that it was Mark Strong, that he had broken it for some reason? Yeah. And then he's like contacts in prison like, hey, Mark, what are you doing? He's just like, especially, especially given what we see later in the film. Contact one. I know who he is. Just got a Wonder Woman. I don't know what's up. Yeah. Or just anyone that can be told and warned about the future of Earth as opposed to the person who broke the staff. Like, OK, really dumb, but fine. Go to the Justice League. He looks like some evil guy who did it. Yeah, like Mark Strong. Oh, yeah, sorry. Anyway, yeah, he gets in contact with his Sam. It's nice and lucky. He's he's having a dream currently about hanging out with Wonder Woman. And that's the scene where you don't see her face at all. It's a I thought they were going to make a joke. So I knew she was in the movie where he would be like, you know, it's I thought it would be like that lame joke where he's like, it's like a dream where you can never quite see the thing you're trying to look at. And the camera just pans up and she's actually there. And you'd be like, I don't see who actually have it. But no, not in that, yeah, because they probably didn't have it when they were filming that one, I doubt it. And so, yeah, you only see her from the back until she turns into the wizard. But only in the face and the beard. Everything else is Wonder Woman. Yeah, it just has the wizard. What do I think of it? That's hilarious. If so, the goal here of the wizard is to tell Shazam that there are evil daughters of Athena and they're coming to get them. And they're the barrier between the realms has been broken. And the bad stuff is going to happen. It's very, very, very important. This is a very high stakes message. And the way that it is conveyed is just to be clear. It's in a dream, right? He does this in a dream. He doesn't do it in the real world or anything like that. In a dream, Shazam is dreaming about dating Wonder Woman. And so he inserts himself into that dream by making Wonder Woman's face become his face in voice so that he can then talk to Shazam in this dream. Yeah. Yeah. What if he were just, yeah. Because every time when every time when I have a dream after this, like, oh, man, maybe this means something and it's not like this has an impact on my actual life. Yeah, I fucking forget my dreams really quick when I wake up. Exactly. I too choose to like write them down or remember them very deliberately for them to stay or they just yeah. So Shazam could just go going like a Billy rather. Oh, that was a weird dream. Anyway, moving on. Well, so before we go to that, I was just as was kind of implied, there's like the strategy, of course, should have been that he actually sits down as himself as the wizard and talks to him very seriously. So it's like, you need to write to me instead of being like, I'm Wonder Woman. And you're I guess we need to chalk that up as like an accident, like that wasn't meant to happen. Like how much control does he have over his dreams? I don't know. Don't think he just really wanted to be like, oh, he has to do it this way. It's like. Yeah, it has to be Wonder Woman's face. OK. I don't know. But I guess we don't get any rules to break all that one. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, he's he says, you fool of a champion, I bring a warning. The daughters of Atlas are coming for you. They're coming to unmake your world and torture mankind into the pit of endless agony. So basically so far, nothing useful. Nope. And then he says, oh, wow, I should write this down. He says, why does it just know you don't know what you've done? I regret ever choosing you because of you. The barrier of the world has been brought down and they will be hunting the ones you love. Again, nothing useful. I think that the wizard, you need to take a little bit more personal responsibility for not telling you anything. But also, you tell him something you can actually use. All of this is just fucking ranting. Yeah, like, I get you're upset, but like, you know, now is the time to convey some useful information to Billy, if you want him to actually save the world. That's where you're in luck for me. So he says, the one thing you absolutely must not let happen is and then he gets electrocuted and cut off. Yeah. Oh, how in the movie and what a what a movie thing. That's writing. Because because the reason we do that is to set up that there's something else to find out and we don't know what it is. How how interesting. Hmm, that's mystery. I like me some mystery. The thing he didn't waste all the time by talking about how much he hates them first. Yeah, that would be that would be awkward. So annoying, because when it's just like that line we talked about earlier and some of the other ones where when you have the camera like zoom in on him and he's like, one thing you absolutely must not let happen is you're like, yeah, he's going to get cut off. Yeah, that's all you do. Yeah, yeah. This script is so thoroughly generic. You know everything that's going to happen before it happens. Not because it's well written, but because it's so tropey and it's so cliche and it's funny cliche. Yeah, some of those tropes are like the time it's most coherent. Just him doing that and getting hate. You're like, well, that was a stretch in terms of timing, but I guess it's not a whole. So that's what could happen. I guess it could happen. I think it might by numbers parts. They they're harder to fuck up. I think it might help make sense of the script to know that one of the writers wrote fast in the furious three, four, five, six, seven and eight. Yeah, that explains that. That explains the fossil furious reference in the film explains the theme about family. Oh, right. Yeah. You guys got the trailer. The world as with fast 10. The end of the road begins. That is a funny. It's funny. That's a trope in and of itself. The end begins. Wasn't that the tagline for God of War three? It was. Yeah. Well, the name of one of the most famous songs. Right. It's it's it's a good meme. The end begins. It's like the end it begins. That's crazy. I see the word end and begin next to each other. And my brain goes, whoa, well, it's and I don't it's not just that it's next to Ted. The end begins. Now, the 10th, finally started to get to the end. Yeah. And I think it's going to be funny that they went. Yeah. The fast in the furious, too fast, too furious. The fast and the furious Tokyo drift. And we've got all the way into now fast. That's just the name of the world. Well, there was five. There was well, because fast, there was the reboot, which was for that was just fast and furious. So they got rid of the fast and and and then the drop the cleaner. They had the end in the end, but they got rid of the the and then it was fast five. And then what was it? Was it like furious? It was in furious six and then furious seven. Oh, my God. The fate of the furious is eight. That's right. We're going to have an annual. That's nine. I think it was fast, fast and furious nine. Was it or was it fast? I don't even and then it was fast X. Yeah, that's funny as fuck. And then, of course, you can't forget about fast and furious presents. No, it was F nine. If you were sorry, it was actually F nine. It was fast and furious presents. I love how inconsistent the naming is. It's hilarious. It's called. Oh, and also it's called F nine. The fast saga. Oh, yeah. And then the last X is just fast X. And what's the last X? Yeah, the end of the fast, the furious. I mean, I don't know if that's the furious five. But I just feel like you have to come a wall up at the potential drift. That's right. Yeah. Oh, my God. It's the end of the fast and furious. I go drift five furious. Right. Of the F nine X 11. Do it. Present it by and then do it again. That's right. Fast and furious. Yeah, the fast saga. The fast saga. They went into space in the last movie. Can you believe it? Incredible. You know what I can actually, yeah. It's only a matter of time, I thought. Freddie, the Spanish version of fast and furious was Los Bandoleros. Good. Yeah. Yeah, I know. Freddie wakes up. No, sorry. When Billy wakes up, of course, he says, like, Whoa, what was that? And his his little globe in his room explodes. They don't know why that happened. I was very confused because I thought we're a we're a foot. Well, I thought he was about to get attacked. Like they like they come in close. They're like, oh, they're coming for Shazam now. He's going to have to fight now. But then the scene just ends. My rate of that was, ah, see, it wasn't just a dream. Electricity. That's like Shazam related. What are those called? I think you're right. Those electric balls. Oh, I know what that is. It's something, isn't it? Or an electric ball. Static electricity. Electric ball. What are they called? Like what's a ball? Plasma ball. Plasma ball. OK, they're called plasma balls. Plasma globe. I guess I'll have to go with the that interpretation, the freaking cap had, because I got nothing for it. I just don't I can't crack it. It's like he wakes up. He sees it go and it's like, OK. And it just throws glass everywhere and there's no problems are all OK. One other interpretation possible is that it's happening because someone shes amped. Maybe. And then the explanation. Well, but the thing is like Freddy, maybe, but he's nowhere near the house at that point. So yeah, well, then they he must have a really high usage for these plasma balls. I was about to say he was replace of every day. Yeah, it's like, oh, again, it's given them by the city. Yeah, not not sure about that exactly, but we'll go with this one. Yes. Let me cut to Freddie, who's just in an alleyway, and he's looking through, I guess, crime. Current crime is happening. And you hear him going, nope, over it. Yeah, this is crime app open. I don't know what I'm willing to give him that. I guess whatever he's tapped into, he's got a way of might be the police, blah, blah, blah. But it's something like that. Yeah, the the. So I was listening to him, he says, nope, over it. Done it. Check for what? Are you kidding me? Oh, armored car heist. And then he shazams and he flies and he's going, and then it cuts to him at school, having a really shitty school lunch. Like, see the difference. And I was just thinking, like, I don't want to do what you're doing film. I want to do the fact that he just scrolled over something and said, done it. Like he's doing this for the fun of it. He's not doing it to help people. That's way more interesting to actually address. And the film doesn't ever talk about that sort of thing. No, absolutely not. Nothing to do with this movie. The idea is like, oh, it's someone sitting robbed. Yeah, but yeah, those robbers have it all the time. Lame done it too many times. Fuck you, lady. That's yeah, so oh, well. And so the girl turns up again and she's like, can you show me where you met the superheroes? It's like, yeah, that's not us at all. This this lady's never appeared before. And she's hell bent on getting every last piece of information you have about the superhero. I just I got the distinct impression she was evil at this point. I was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. But the thing is, it drops pretty fast because this movie is broken up, I think, into four acts, is how I would put it. Seems that way. Who being revealed to be evil is back to, I think, beginning of act two. I don't know. It's really hard to sort of nail with. I think it's the beginning of act three, but it almost seems like it's not. It almost seems like the beginning of act three because it's such a dramatic escalation. Yeah. You're not wrong. There's still most of the movie left at that point. And Freddie says, sorry, I have an overbearing brother. And then she goes, oh, I have a sister who's like that. You always just to know where I am. She thinks she knows better than me. Nice to not have someone breathing down your neck because I'm not a kid anymore. And that's where I was like, yep. So she's related to those great people. She's evil. We were even thinking before that in the first hallway sequence is like, why? Why is this this new random girl shows up and she takes this interest to this is this guy, this Freddie guy, when Freddie doesn't seem to have any positive qualities whatsoever to be attracted to. Really? And like, OK, that's I don't I think, Mama, you'd ask you didn't know if this was bad writing or if she was evil. Yeah. It's one of the two. I just want to do bad writing. You should always assume that's probably this movie. Yes. Safe bet. Yeah, I writing. I kind of underestimated the movie because I thought like, well, there's no I had the brief thought that maybe that she's related to them somehow. But I'm like, no, that's too stupid. They wouldn't do that. Oh, well. So then Billy turns up and he drags Freddie off to talk to him about this dream. And he says it's the wizard desperately trying to contact him. And it was really strange because I think everybody would have just come to conclude like we mentioned earlier that you wouldn't think much of that beyond it being a dream. The wizard is dead. And what did he say in the dream that you're not good enough and that something called the Sisters of Atlas are coming? That sounds pretty absurd. And maybe something you read in some school, you know, thing. I don't know. Nobody ever even entertains this. The Freddie immediately says like, wait, the wizard, but he died. Like, it was a dream. He's not alive because he's in a dream. It's a dream. What a woman's dream. And then you're like, oh, how did you see him? It's like, yeah, he was one woman's face. Like, you know, that might have just been a dream. Something that just happens. But no, no, we treat it all as real and we move forward. Is it real? OK, good. Um, yeah, he says he's going to organize everybody to. Well, figure this out. And they say the daughter's guard, the mythic tree of life, which grows golden apples that contain the seeds of life, which give birth to their realm that's protected by a dragon. All right. Yep. Well, I'm glad we've all done that. Good. Yeah. Um, and then Pedro says, I know someone that might be able to help. And yeah, we get introduced to possibly the most useful thing on earth, casually, because they talk about this. He opens up a secret door behind. I think it's gluttony is the statue. I think so. Yeah. He hits like a blue button on the gluttony statue. And then it slides back and swings away. And then like a whole new section of their layer just opens up. Yeah. And he takes me to a room. He. Oh, God. Takes him into a room filled with magical flying books. The huge library. And they go to the center table. They see this little pen and he's writing something and he introduces it as Steve, the pen, and he knows everything. Wow. He never told them. That is here. No, it's obviously that literally knows the answers to all things wouldn't be that useful. There's an entire massive section of the cave. And boy, it's like massive this underground library area with a with an omniscient pen that writes things down whenever you talk to it as it's way to answer used to write things down. It knows everything. And he has never told anybody else that this entire part of the cave exists. Now, you might think like, oh, well, of course, he found it because he's mapping out the cave, right? Like, no, that's the other character that was mapping out the entire cave. He didn't find it. This guy did for some reason. And he didn't tell. He even pointed out, doesn't he? He's like, are you kidding me? I'm mapping out this whole thing and I didn't find this. Something like that. I think I remember something. And just like the film does several times, they lampshade it and then there's no answer. No, it's like the movie feels like, oh, we already gave this gave this guy all the mapping out of the doors. Let's give this guy the hidden big ass library with Steve in it. So they all have something. It's like, OK, one in chat said, pretty smart pen. Yeah, pretty smart pen. Well, he's pretty smart. The smartest pen, you might say. And this is the thing, if David Sandberg wrote like a how to write or I guess because he's directing, but like, I just I can already imagine the tip in there being like, if you ever noticed kind of a flaw that's kind of getting in the way, just a good way to sort of move past it is to have a character point it out and then, you know, the audience laugh with you and they kind of forget that it's a problem. I could totally see myself actually fixing it. Because I mean, what does it mean to fix a problem with the scripts? There's no such thing, even though it's a sort of thought process like that kind of acknowledges as much. Yeah. Well, it's the kind of shit when we have throwaway lines from Ryan Johnson or JJ to try and correct up the script. I'm like, you just did it there. Why? Why did you do it there? And you never do it anywhere else? Is it because it's easier there that it was these other places? And so you just gave up? Is that it? Tell me the answer. It's almost worse. It shows that you're aware of these things that you couldn't be asked to fix it. Yeah. Yeah. In their minds, do they think do they imagine that this one is the one the audiences will really need to know? So we'll explain this one because or else audiences, they'll be confused. They won't know what's going on. So we need to explain this one. This is the one we need to explain. You know, what does it mean for an audience member to be confused as to what's happening in a story? You know, like, what does that mean? Oh, it probably means that something is incongruent, right? I don't know. Might be worth giving that a bit of thought. No, the only thing I could think of that could possibly answer the question of why he didn't tell them is because he's getting the pen to write him a book report, crime and punishment thing. But the thing is that's thrown out the window because he presents it to them and he's proud of it. It's a joke. It's only when Mary says, oh, Pedro, and he's like, what? So South Park just did an episode about chat, GPT, where like a plot thread was the the boys using the app to write like school reports for them. This is Proto Chat GPT. He's Steve, the pen, the original version of that. Steve GPT. It is kind of crazy, though, that he wouldn't tell them about this labyrinth of knowledge, like this absolute wealth of knowledge, just because he didn't want people to know that he was using the thing to to cheat at school. But then he brags about it anyway. Of what use would it really be considering how they end up using Steve? They go, they use, oh, yeah. We're looking for information about the Daughters of Atlas. Can you help us? And Steve writes, I think, six book titles. And so they go, aha, we'll take one each. Instead of just asking them, what's in those books? Yeah. What information do they want? Do they want to know what the Daughters of Atlas want? Ask Steve that. They want to know where they came from? Ask Steve that. Do they want to know what powers they have? Ask Steve that. Why are you going to go read books that'll have vast majority of them useless information? Not because it's useless information in general, but because it's useless right now. That's a matter of time. Takes a while to read a book, especially if that book is dense with information. You don't have a lot of time. Oh, you know, you need to you need to use Steve like Blinkist to get those summaries. Yeah, yeah, like this summary. Steve, this Shazam Pure, the Gods is brought to you by Blinkist. Oh, good God. Oh, and so what do you think, Steve? Well, I mean, I mean, I guess they didn't have time because it was brought to you by another brand. All the books in the library are in English, by the way. Yeah, of course. But it wouldn't be like the Greek ones. It's not written in Greek. I guess Steve wrote all of them. Westmark, I don't know. In English beforehand. Yeah, he knew everything. He knew that one day these these kids, these magical superhero kids would need these pages written in a language they understand. He knew. Well, and I assume there's no throwaway line about there being some translation spell on the library or something. What it would be funny if I don't have a funny, maybe it'd be something if they told Steve to write something and he started writing it and like Greek or Latin or some old language. And then they said, well, can you can you write it in English, please? And then he balls up the paper, throws away and starts again. Like that'd be something. Yeah. Yeah. Be something. That would be something. Not much, but something. What's what am I thinking of? So there is a there's some. I don't know if it's a cartoon or something, but characters in this cartoon or something come across the source of all knowledge. They like a person, a wizard or whatever that knows the answers to everything. And they start asking him like really stupid questions like, you know, well, for my entire life, if you took all my shits and they were like bricks and it made a wall five feet tall, how long would the wall go? And they just have a bunch of weird pooping questions like that. But how much poop if they ever pooped and stuff? Like, I don't know. Maybe someone knows what I'm talking about. I have no idea what it is, but that's a thing. And I was familiar. Yeah, I have no idea what that is. Maybe someone will. He said robot chicken. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It might be a robot chicken bag. It's just the stupidest questions just out of curiosity. Yeah, you probably would ask stupid questions. I think. Yeah. Like how many pounds of poop have I ever pooped? I mean, what do you think I am? I mean, look what people use to check everything before the first time they use it to be like, so big foot. What happened with that? What's the truth? I think that a thing. He's like, it's all bullshit. You're like, I knew it. Locked as well as three. He's like, oh, that's true. You're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Ancient aliens. That's something that kids would ask, right? These are kids who have access to this this this pen that gives all the answers to everything and they don't have like any gags about that. They don't have any jokes. They don't use this to remind you that these are kids and this is the kind of things that kids would ask. They just don't know what this guy is. The thing like the kids will selectively act like kids when it's useful to the plot, but a lot of the opportunities to to have them act like kids in situations that could be interesting or funny or just for God. Yeah, they don't take advantage of that. Oh, so we cut to them on the roof of the school, Fredy and Gil. And Theo. Don't know that. Are you just calling our girl and right? Yeah. But that's OK. Well, we're about to get it anyway. Well, this is where you hang out with. She says this is where you hang out with your superhero friend. Huh? Do you even know those guys? Or she's like, is it a Canadian girl friend type situation? Basically, are you lying about know them? So it's like, yeah, she keeps on prying and he's like, oh, you know, I can I can show you, I can bring captain every power here right now. And he goes behind the corner and then ends into him, brings him here. And then like he says, I think she says, I've never met someone like Freddie. He's genuine, warm and funny. It's just like a woman. You've had like one conversation. You've been alive for six thousand years. Yeah. I don't believe you. She's attracted to a minor and she's six thousand years old. Well, and they've known each other for like five seconds. It's not even remotely built at all. And then she says, how did you two meet? And he goes, Comic Con. And then she goes, what's Comic Con? Like, what can we cut? Didn't laugh. Why? I know if that is. Hey, you guys know Comic Con? I'm packing. I packed up the laugh. I'll use it later for something good. Oh, after reading all of the books because they cut back and now they've got some knowledge. They didn't just ask Steve, of course, they start reading out and they say, God's considered human servants, toys to be played with, children to be punished until the rebellion where the humans turned on the gods. Like, OK, I guess. All right, then. Yeah. Yeah, I know. This is just the thing. We talked about Atlas made a staff that could give and take powers for the gods. And then the staff was stolen by the Council of Human Wizards and what they then stole in total. That's their name, the Council of Human Wizards. So stupid. That's like a Rick and Morty joke. The Council of Human Wizards. But they're not actually human. They're like cyborgs or aliens pretending to be humans. So the name is funny because they're not the thing is. So they say, oh, God. How is it was stolen total? The wisdom of Solomon, the strength of Hercules, the stamina of Atlas, the power of Zeus, the courage of Achilles and the speed of Mercury, which is what he says when he gives him the power in. OK. And then he says, if I may point out one of the powers that might be MIA and he points to the wisdom of Solomon. And then Shazam says, are you saying I lack the wisdom of solo man? Which? Oh, the idea that he can't like read the word Solomon. I can't hear it, apparently. Yeah, you heard him say it. I've never heard this name before. Well, she said it. Rags, you pointed this out. She said it like two seconds before. You said the wisdom of Solomon, like Mary said it, that he goes solo man. Like, how does that happen? It's not even an A. Solomon, not Solomon. It's like a Digimon, Solomon. He's the wisest Digimon. So this is this is kind of what I'm getting. I was like, that's just a joke that doesn't work. I'm sorry. There's a couple of layers on how that just doesn't work. So you don't get to have whatever funny that may have come out of it as a misunderstanding that does make sense. It's just gone. You don't get to earn that. It's gone. Yes. Right, that one. Sorry. Would have been an easy rewrite, too. So then they say, once the staff contain the power of the gods, the wizards encase the gods in their god realm in a sphere, cutting them off from the other realms. So then one of them goes, oh, that's what that was about. And the others like, huh, what, what? And then he takes them all into their room with the TV and points to a news report of the gods having turned everyone into stone in that museum. And it's like, wait, you knew this had happened. You didn't tell anybody that new people walked into a museum on Earth in Greece and fucking stonified everyone. You don't think that that didn't come up? Conversation at all. No. Why does everyone keep keeping things for each other until it's relevant to the plot? Oh, because it's a really interesting script because they didn't exist. It's really odd, too, because Shazam looks at it and goes, wait, how did the staff end up in Greece? And then as the cameras like panning, you have the one that knew about all this says, by the way, the statues were people. And then they don't address that at all. And he goes, well, I did break it in half and throw it away. Like he just casually mentions all those statues with people and no one gives a shit and they just move on. No one cares. I don't know why they had him say that if that's all they were going to do with it. Very strange. I was just like, yeah, I got nothing. Moving on, I guess. I don't suppose the scene was longer at some point and then they chopped out some bits for time, but they didn't realize the bits were the things connecting the bits together. So it just falls to pieces. You, yeah, you know, I believe it, 100%. I believe it 100%. I believe that the writer of Fast and Furious 3 was, yeah, it was that oddly enough, he is speeding through this movie, which is probably the best. Also, he doesn't know how bumpers work, which is... No, and they do talk about the whole staff thing, but we went over that, that's fine. And so he says, well, at least now we know what the two sisters look like. And then Pedro is like three sisters, because he happened to read in his part of his book that there are three sisters, including Anthea. And then Shazam goes, Anthea, because he knows the girl that Freddy's talking to in school is called Anne. And so he puts together that that's Anthea. I don't know how he possibly could have came to that conclusion. This is the guy who can't say Solomon. Yes, and then he put that together, because you know what, it's just fine. We just kind of need him to, yeah. It's as simple as that. Well, nice reach as they would say. It's a very selective wisdom of Solomon. Yes. But then she says, if Freddy comes here, he's in serious danger. She says this to, you know, superhero Freddy. And then he says, look, look who I am. Look who you're with. What could possibly be dangerous? And then Helen Mirren and Lucy Luebac and they go, us. It's like, oh, why are you guys so shillily written? I just don't get it. I mean, the whole thing is, but you know, it seems special with their dialogue. What was that promo image you had with Wonder Woman with a sword? Oh, it's like a Photoshop. It'll be useful eventually. Oh, okay. I was about to say, if that's an actual image, that's a fucking lie. Oh yeah. I'm not saying you're a liar. I'm sorry, Shazam, Wonder Woman's block. So I was just thinking like logistically, where were these guys the whole time? It's like, do you think they were hiding somewhere in the school waiting for Anthea to bring out one of the heroes, like to tempt one out? It was just like, come on. Maybe. I guess that's it, right? Yeah, cause I can't show us that. It'd be fucking hilarious. So they just have to sort of be like, yeah. But wait, aren't they surprised? Is it child? No, well, so they see the hero. They don't know the child stuff yet. None of them do. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. So why, bring it up, because why then would she even go to that school? Because she's going to that school. Well, it's because she hung out with Group Man and Shazam at the end. A couple of people have seen this as a plot hole, but this is just because no one remembers the first film. This is why we rewatched it. Because it's, oh, we've got to give credit to the film where it's due. But say it again, because you're going to talk to me. Oh, yeah, okay. I haven't said it yet. So what's in the first film is friends with Shazam openly. Like you see him in public. A lot of people have phones. Oh, okay, okay, okay. And then he starts recording them doing their training montage and putting it on YouTube, getting tens of thousands of views, I think we see. And then he tells the whole school, hey, I can get the superheroes to visit me in school. And then he does and even Superman shows up, well, allegedly, you don't see his face, but they want you to think it's super bad. And then in this film, of course, they reference that with he's the make-a-wish, thunder crack, whatever. So he is the one kid. If you wanted to find the heroes, he's the one kid who's actually met them and talks to them. Which is what comes the next criticism, which is why the fuck haven't the government either followed him, tapped his phones, or just talked to him in general. None of that has happened. Because they find out, of course, that he's a hero pretty quickly. Yeah, that's a good question. Remind me why they're even after heroes? Like why are they seeking them out? They want their powers back. They don't want them to. I got the power. Oh, right, okay, never mind. Which, you know, Helen Mirren does explain it, and I think it's fierce. Like you stole my father's powers, I'm taking them back, bitch, that sort of thing. Right. We'll talk about Lucy Liu when we get there. So wait, what powers does she not have? If the staff is back together, she seems to have a lot of powers. What powers does Helen Mirren have? It's not about whether or not she has them. It's that she doesn't want them to have them. What's interesting, by the way, is that those two seem to not have speed. Yeah, that's weird. Every, they can get it. All they have to do is say Shazam while holding the staff and they get it, but they don't. And not having the super speed kind of costs them big time. Yeah, which is weird. You've been, for two years now, they've been doing superhero shenanigans. You'd feel like they'd have a really good grasp on their powers. Anything that'd be really good at it? Nope. You'd think. Oh, they suck at dodgeball. Oh, good dodgeball even though fast for their ball. Speaking of, Freddie is overconfident. He's like, what are you gonna do? And then Lucy Liu punches him and he flings across the room. And he's like, oh, okay, let's go. And then they fire the staff at him, which takes his powers off him. But the thing that annoys me so much is that when you're like a super speedster, is it, don't you experience, because with the accuracy they run around in, you experience the world in hyperslow motion at your will, right? You can, we're gonna have to headcanon that they do. I was gonna say, there's no way they can, if they're moving at hyperspeed in real time, then they would be flinging into stuff. They wouldn't be able to stop exactly where they need to be, right? I don't even know if it's worthwhile to try and figure that out. Well, this is a simple one. This gets applied to everything. What I'm bringing it up here for is that she fires a fucking laser at him and he just stands there and takes it. And then it takes out his powers. No, it's one of the first and many instances of why don't you use your super speed? Yeah, it's just really useful and powerful. You should use that. Well, we've talked for years. Speedsters are tough. When you give anyone super speed, it makes everything so much harder. Yeah. Gotta make them tire out really quickly or it has to recharge or they have to have an energy source for it or like it wears them out. You gotta have some sort of a limiter for it. Or it's fatal to go too fast sort of thing. Then we get this. Just for a second. This, this image that you have of the three daughters of Atlantis. It looks like Helen Mirren's or Atlantis. It looks Photoshopped, doesn't it? The one on the right. Yeah, her head, her crown doesn't look like it matches. Like they just stuck it on later. Yeah, it looks like this shot didn't have the crown on it and then they put it on. I don't know if this is official or not. I think it's just the light that doesn't quite seem right, you know? It looks like it had more clarity than her face. It's the middle of the head. It looks really like they don't blend at all. Yeah, it's, her head doesn't look like, like the crown is way more clear than her face is, you know? The crown isn't being affected by the backlight. Yeah. The face is really smooth, like inhumanly smooth, like no pores. Inhumanly smooth. Yes. He's the God of pores. Her name is Epidermia. She is the goddess of skin. So that guy we mentioned, that teacher, he opens the fire exit behind this whole thing happening and goes, what's going on here? Who are you guys? You guys have kids here? And you're like, what are you doing, Phil? Why is he here? What's gonna happen now? Why does he just come up to the roof every now and then to see what's going on up there? Yeah. His office is right below that and he's like, I heard a laser sound. What's going on up there? Those superheroes again. And she loosely walks up to him and Freddy's like, no, don't touch him. And then she goes, I won't touch him at all. Something like that. I don't know what the quote is, but she walks up to him and she goes with the power of chaos and she just gets him to mind control style, just dropped himself off the roof. And, yeah. And you, and Theo just sort of lets that happen. Yep, she doesn't stop it. She has the power to stop this, but she doesn't stop it. Freddy has quite a reaction to this. It's like, totally, it's really strange. This is a totally, this is a kind of a bizarre movie actually. Oh yeah. And he's like, he's very distraught about that. He's like, whoa. Well, we cut over to Lucy Lou who says, I forgot how easily they burst like grapes. What, what, no, she's just evil. What are we doing? Like David, what is this? What is this point of the scene? If he was like, well, let's just show Lucy Lou is evil. Like, really? That's it. Okay. Okay. We didn't even know that guy's name. Like, it was just. Poor guy. But he got introduced to be like guy who you kind of like maybe. And then it's like guy whose head just got splattered. It's like, fine. Like you're expecting because of this movie and its tone that he gets saved. Like that's when the heroes show up and they save him from the air or they grab him as he's fallen. I was like, no, he just dies in front of everyone and all those kids probably saw it and they're traumatized now and Freddie's screaming. And it's like, oh, what, oh, that's not good. Yeah. If they wanted to do the more serious kind of horror adjacent stuff, I would have really liked it if there were lasting consequences for the characters or anything, you know, or if it was more consistent. If, you know. Like kind of like the real life is catching up to these kids. They're playing a dangerous game by being superheroes. They're creatures from other realms that they can't really compete with or understand much. And they're being very flimsy or not flimsy. They're flipping with their powers. They are, they haven't matured, right? And this is kind of almost a dark story of them learning to, you know, growing up, becoming responsible with the powers and all the good and the bad that comes along with it. Tell me a vague thing. Which seems appropriate for DC, but I don't know. They didn't do that. Whatever. No. They didn't. Yeah, and then we see the first instance of Antia's power of Freddy tries to run away and she goes and moves the entire nature of the building itself to move Freddy back around so he can be grabbed by Helen Mirren. It's like, what the hell did you just do? Yeah. Literally like clockwork, I don't know, MC Asher's style just like moved everything all around in the school, but apparently it only affected them. Question mark, I don't know. I don't know about that because we then see how it gets used like a minute later. Well, yeah, because Freddy's like, oh wait, I don't have to answer your question because look, and we see Shazam is on the way. Cause of course he pieced everything together from Antia, like any smart person would. And so he's heading there. And this is actually a clip they released to Helen Mirren's like, Antia, clip his wigs. And so she manipulates the entire city. Like to illustrate it, the buildings are like moving around all over the place. The ground is shifting. Yeah. It's like a, it's like a carnivory, like a room or something. Yeah. I think some of the buildings even get like this, like... Yeah, the buildings are so well, yeah. Switched up, Shuffle is a good word, yeah. The question on your mind is, so is this like, this is happening in reality? And the answer is yes, cause Shazam gets hit by a building and it damages the building and it stops him. So like these buildings are moving presumably with people in them and all over the street and all over the place. You, you, you are more sunlight. You think this is an illusion. Your mind goes to, this is an illusion. You're like, you're looking at it with people's minds. It would be like, it's like in the mirror dimension except this is happening seemingly in reality. How many people do we think are dead because of Anthea? A thousand. Yeah, a thousand seems like it might be a low ball. It's like, it's like I said, it's like a category 30 earthquake or something. It's quite a big block. She moves around as well. It's a lot of buildings. It's a huge portion of the city, yeah. And then moving hyper fast to the point where if you were in one of those buildings, it gets planted. You get splattered to the wall. Yeah, absolutely. Anthea, Anthea there. Anthea who I mean, jumping ahead, she's presented as like, ah, now you're all right at the end. Like, yeah, I just know she is not already. No, she's not. She let that do to all of his death and then moved around all these buildings just to stop him. And then it probably would have killed thousands of people in the process. Yeah, my brain melted. It's hard to really explain. I feel like it's kind of like our explanation is good, but it doesn't really do it justice. Just what is actually happening. If it's a clip that's out there, maybe you can show it. It's like the buildings come apart like puzzle pieces and start contorting around. And you imagine people have to be getting skewered and crushed and splattered. And you imagine once the buildings resettle, it would just be there would just be red jam pouring onto the street. What would be for the buildings to even resettle with the buildings designed to be able to withstand this kind of forces? Or is that? I don't know. I doubt it. I do kind of love that. Like all the buildings kind of end up where they started in the movies, like, well, then everything's fine, right? You know, they start where they started. Well, I think so in Philadelphia, like totally changed the layout of that she changed it all. And just to have it change back because she was nice enough to make sure that it all went back to where it was before. That's what it looked like to me, but I could be wrong. You know, just because they didn't want to commit to having the buildings be all fucked up and everything. I don't think they thought like, no, they don't do it. Kind of visually interesting. And it's like, yeah, I suppose it is. But like, what is happening? I just imagine the one guy who was out for vacation. He comes back home and like his flat is like three blocks the other way. It's like, what's what's going on here? He's one of the lucky ones. The other guy's from the other side of the city. And he doesn't have a car. He needs to get to work by walking. And now he can't. So he destroyed his livelihood right there. His favorite restaurant doesn't deliver to him anymore because he's too far away. Sucks the real heartbreak here. Yeah, but for every person who got moved further away from their favorite restaurant, think of all the people who got moved further towards the restaurant. The other son of the hero of the film, Anthea. And what about all the people who were crushed to death by their favorite restaurant? Well, you know what? If I was going to get crushed to death, I'm glad it was by my favorite restaurant. It was going to be anything. I'm glad it was the restaurant. Many of you can find the clip. I'm struggling to not write keywords. I'm going to try. I'm finding a couple of, I look for it a little bit. I couldn't find it because I found one. This is only a couple of seconds. I'm trying to find. So I know it exists. It's like a clip of about 15 seconds, at least, I don't know. Hmm, what's what's the the the the character's name? And the and the. Yeah, and the let me see. I'm looking. Well, if you guys have a look, I can't believe the movie. I mean, it was just one of those things. So it's like, it sounds really. It's really crazy the way that we describe it. But that's like what happens. Yeah, the city rearranges itself like Rubik's cubes and it shuffles around and the ground spins about. And it's like, you know, it's like, if you play Minecraft, you have the chunks, you know, Minecraft has chunks and all the chunks just start like moving around and shuffling like those puzzles. And then they like rearrange all the blocks inside of them. And it's kind of like that. But it's actually happening. Yeah, like for maybe maybe a comparison to something that's more readily available. So remember what Dr. Strange inexplicably did to the bus in in multiverse of madness, how we just pulled it apart and then put it back together. Imagine that. But every building in the city is being pulled apart and put back together with magic and reshuffled. Dr. Strange one, of course, is only in the mirror, but then the big reveal is Caecilius with the power of the whatever, whatever can do all of that, but in the real world. And then Dr. Strange just fucking does it in the real world. And it's like, hey, yeah. Like has he been reading the cagley, straw, whatever the fuck, whatever. Anyway, different. Different worlds. The clip on good morning, America. So it's got a bunch of like watermarks and stuff all over the place. At least at least it's something, right? Right. Let's see. But yeah, by the way, Clip is wings. He's got the strength of Hercules. Is is even that much to put a building on him? Like throw him even. Maybe he's like Superman, right? When you got thrown through all those buildings in Man of Steel, it's like the buildings make way and give way in the face of him. Yeah, that's that's well. Then again, we saw it in the first exam, right? He got punched into the building and he didn't go through it. He just sort of hit it. He hit the glass and stopped really sturdy. It's the same glass at the other time. Except the other time he hit the glass when he jumped over the building in a single bound. He went into the building. Yeah, when he probably shouldn't have, he should have stopped less force than him getting punched directly into the thing. All right, we'll play this on background Yeah, thank you. Good morning, America. Good morning, America. Yeah, and I was built in copyright shield. Then they say, wait, there's more of them. And I was just like, why didn't they arrive together? Why did Shazam is the important main character? So yeah, in terms of like, I don't know, the way that it works with like contracts for actors and trailer footage and stuff. You know, even with all of our explanation. I don't think people were ready for this. He really wanted them to get together, but I guess... Look at that. Like, come on. That's nonsense, guys. Yeah. He killed all of everyone. This is... They're all dead, daughter. They're all dead. Many thousands of people are dead. You know what it is? It's like bumper cars, but the bumper cars are rearranging each other and also they're giants. It's just funny because I think a lot of people would be like, it's obviously an illusion. It's like, unfortunately, no. That's what we thought. That's what your mind goes to first. It acts on him, though. That's the problem. It affects him physically. Yeah, well, what I thought was happening is that they were projecting the illusion of this in his mind and that if he crashed into the building, that would be his mind subconsciously directing him into the real building. But that's not what it is. Later in the film, it essentially has teleportation capabilities. It's like teleporting somewhere because he rearranged the world around you. So it's not an illusion. It moves you to different places, which is definitely a thing that's happening physically. It's such a big problem. Yeah, how many people dead there? I don't even want to begin to figure out. I mean, nothing that may be Superman or anyone would get involved with. You know, it's still. Well, I mean, what? And then they didn't get involved after the... Because that's what's next. Great, though. Yeah, Lucy Lou then says, you know, we can take them all and then Halibut is like, no. I was like, wait, what's happening? Yes, right? Surely, well, is that the plan? She's like, no, it's not why we're here. We're here for the seed of life, yield sister. I was like, no, you're here for the powers too. You're here for the seed of life. This, wow, this is some new information, I guess. Well, that's the thing. Yeah, I think that's why I was confused about why they were actually here because they kind of switched it up and they're no longer as desperate to relieve them of their, remove their powers from them. Even though I thought that was the whole point. Yeah, so if the point is really only to get the seed of life to plant the tree, then why bother with the whole like 21 Jump Street operation in the high school? That's because I think it's a fucking thing. They forgot that the motivation simultaneously is to get all the powers back and to get the seed of life they want to do then. Yeah, because I say the champions of Earth are the only people who can stop them. Well, and she expresses that she feels ownership of those powers, they don't deserve them. They're her property almost because they come from a father or mother. Yeah, you have to have the fact that they want the powers back from them, otherwise they wouldn't seek them out because they wouldn't stand in their way if they just didn't even know this was happening. And this is completely inconsistent all over the movie. They need the superheroes because they need them to get to the rock of eternity because they apparently can't go there themselves. Which is later really not the case at all. Not even close to the case at all. So we'll try and unpack this as we go. Yeah, she says father would never yield and it's like father is dead, know your play, sister or I will show it to you. Like, all right, what the fuck's going on with you guys? Oh, it's tension, they're good at telling each other guys. And then she says we do it our way, not theirs. What does that mean? Racist, like fighting. And I mean, as in what you actually mean, because it is so devoid of like any logical through line, what are you saying? Yeah, it's just one of those scripts where fucking nothing makes sense. And I don't know, you wonder how long did you spend on the script a week, two weeks? An afternoon. Don't know if it's gray. Like, maybe they had a script and Anthea used her powers on the script and rearranged all of the words and the sentences. And so this is just what we have and now the movie's terrible. Oh God. Literally taking their powers is probably the most peaceful and least damaging way they can conduct their whole plan. Yeah. Simple as that. Now we gotta do it our way. Take all their powers and then put a knife to one of their throats and say, hey Billy, open the door to the rock of eternity now. Then he would, of course he would. Then they go get the seeds and they can explain like, hey, you guys didn't deserve any of this shit anyway. But we've taken it back, we're taking the seed, we're gonna go sort out our realm, don't bother us again. And you'd be like, well, we didn't bother you. And you'd be like, just read the fucking books, don't bother us again. Yep. They would have been actually kind of sympathetic in some sense, if that's what they did. So then Helen Mirren's plan instead is to cast a spell that places a dome on Philadelphia and escapes to do it outside, right as Shazam tries to stop them and it works as though he's like, he's chasing them while they're going up on a little platform that's slow by the way, because there's a human on there, so he'd have to survive the flight. So it's not going that fast. And he's a superhero that has super speed and he can't catch up. Of course, you know, that happens. They're moving too fast, Moller. They're just moving way too fast. It's one of those things where he's flying toward them and he keeps catching up. And then the next time we see it, he's really far back again, catching up. And he's like, yeah, okay. They close the dome and they are on the outside, he's on the inside. And yes, I loft in the cinema because I couldn't fucking believe it. They've done the Simpson move. They placed a dome over the LVL. Even the news report is like, some crazy dome is over Philadelphia right now. The LVL is trapped inside of a dome, yeah. And let me just say, the rest of America thanks you. Well, I need to start with an elephant now. We'd already kind of reached it, but this is the point where it's like, so you have no excuse now, Wonder Woman, Superman, Aquaman, Flash, everyone needs to get in. It is a huge as dome. An entire American city is trapped in a dome. Yeah, but it is Philadelphia. Yeah, it is Philadelphia, yeah, somewhere. Let it go. Also, Rags, you pointed this out, but all Freddie had to do was jump off the platform and get saved equally by Shazam, which they've done in the past with all these characters. Freddie just rolls off, Shazam will catch him and that'll be that. Well, I guess Helen Mirren would probably actually use her power of like, nope, you don't go anywhere. Use her power of like, something, wind or whatever. Which would have been interesting. I'm not even sure she's looking at him. She's like looking out at the dome so he could probably do the roll. Why does, why does she, they take Freddie for the, at this point, why are they taking Freddie? It's so that they can get the names of the leverage. It was just leverage. They basically are like, oh, they're trapped in the dome. Well, so I think that's the point that's getting ramped up to. Once you're out of the dome, it seems like you don't actually really need Freddie. Oh, wait, but they do want to find out the names later on. Yeah. All right, well, that makes sense because, yeah, they'd go through this effort to kidnap Freddie and I guess they really want the names of these people. So, yeah, when we get to the scene where they, you know, trying to ask the names they'll really stick with that, you know. Because this plot line, they never really discover the names of superheroes. They never needed them. But that is something they search for. Oh, and also, there was just the matter of what they say before is if you, if you like chase after us, we'll kill Freddie. So it's like, oh, I guess if that's something that you're actually willing to do, then you don't care that much about the names then. Oh, fuck, I forgot them. When Shazam's like banging on the dome, like, no, as they float away, Lucy Lou's like, let's see how you like being sealed off in a dying world. All right, we're gonna talk about Lucy Lou's acting in this movie and how bad it is. I don't know what's going on. It's really shit. Her acting is really bad. Her delivery is awful. It's gotta be. She is like, oh, it's terrible. It feels like she's trolly. The delivery is so deliberately awful. I think she's in a B movie. Yeah, well she is, but. She is in a B movie. A bad movie. Oh, fuck you. Yeah, I just, the news report is so funny. The news report literally reads, Philadelphia trapped in a strange dome. Imagine we read that on like fucking Reddit or Twitter or whatever, just like Philadelphia, by the way, trapped in a strange dome. And yeah, by the way, it follows up with saying it could be the doing or undoing of the Philadelphia fiascos. Could be the doing of the fiascos. Basically what they just said is this may or may not have something to do with those guys. It's like, wow, that's great, dude. It's a top notch report. It is CNN, come on. So they drop. They think that the bridge was collapsed by the fiasco people, so. They drop Freddy in with the wizard in the cell. Why? They only have one cell. There you go. Oh, okay, one. Yeah. I thought it was obvious, but I guess that was fine. Yeah, this is where he says, like, didn't you die? That he's like, no, I just couldn't. I went to a different realm because I couldn't remain in my realm. Master Oogway. And it's like, unfortunately, I ended up in this one and was captured. So there you go, I'm alive now. What a shit. This is what I mean. This script is filled with this bullshit. It's like, you think you can get away with that? That's like awful. This is great. Not only did he survive, quote unquote, he went into another dimension. He just happened to end up in one dimension where they all hate him to death. Well, because he's human. So why can't he just be on earth? Why the hell did he end up in the prison cell of their domain? Like, what happened? Like, yeah. You bet. You think he actually just landed in that cell immediately? He just dies on earth and then just goes like, poof in the cell. I was like, oh, damn it. All the thing. Oh, damn. Not here, not only here, but also in their prison cell. So, yeah, Freddie says, so do something, you know, do use one of your magical spells, turn us into a gas so we can float out of here like a thought. And it like pans out into the wizard and he goes, oh, I gave my powers to children. It's like, yeah. Yeah, he did. You should have picked an adult who was wise and smart and experienced. You had seven billion people to choose from. And probably half of those are adults and half of those are men. Well, any of them you could pick. Think of all the good ones that there are. No. I just don't get it, man. Yeah, you did this. This is what you did. This is the thing. If you want to pitch like... Like, you played as a joke. A kid gets great powers and has to do shit with them. It's like, well, you go to the Spider-Man route where it's a complete accident and you have the best he can with them or the Shazam route where it's bestowed upon him by a very wise wizard. You're like, no, no, you need to write something better than that. This is like, no. Or you have... He's pure of heart, okay? You have like the kids. You have like the wizard gets into a battle with the evil, evil person and he's going to die and he has to give the powers to someone and the only person who's around is the kid, right? And so it's like, you're the only one here. I'm gonna die or turn to dust or whatever. I've gotta give you these powers. Maybe he works a little harder to explain what's going on. But yeah, this is... Like he says, don't let the staff be destroyed or it'll destroy you. Yeah. Yeah, maybe say that. It's just really quick. Yeah, if the staff breaks then the world will be destroyed. The barrier to the evil realms will be, you know, lowered. You can't let this happen. Nice and simple. Well, that'll be nice, but no. Anyway, yeah. So he's like, oh, then those children squandered it. And you're like, yeah, I know, right? Sucks. Like, but anyway, moving on. We get the team of heroes trying to figure out what to do and Shazam's like, if we set up a meeting to negotiate but then we grab one of them and use that to trade. And if, and then one of the other ones says like, well, what if they sap our powers from us? And he says, well, we'll dodge. And then Pedro says, but I suck at dodgeball. This is a check on dodgeball. You see, they set up that he's not good at dodging. I wonder where that will lead. So dodging needed. You guys are faster. Well, you have super speed. Yeah, being bad at dodgeball is kind of pretty irrelevant when you're that fast. I, like, it's just, you're right. Cause that is the right to be in like, nah, I've set something up. Yeah, I'm just setting it up. He doesn't. He just needs to move really fast like he's done in the past. And you're fine. Absolute morons. Gotta move fast like it does in the past. Yeah, what he's saying? Yeah. Gotta catch him off cause he's a dead event. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. So then you're thinking yourselves, well, they can't talk to the gods anyway. They're stuck in the dome now. So what are they gonna do? You're like, ah, well, Darla says. So Steve the Pen says this paper is a stack of magical parchment. You write a message on the magical paper and you say the name of the god you'd like to talk to and then the paper will fold into a paper bird and fly to the god. Wow, that is incredibly convenient to have. That's exactly what you need right at this moment. Wow, that's great. Godly emails. It's gonna be like, I have questions for Yahweh. Can you please ask him? I have questions about what it is. What are you trying to send to a god who isn't real? Like all of them, but like if you had to say, like, oh, that's how you could find out which one was the real one. Oh, you say go that it just doesn't move and the pen looks at you like, sorry, dude. What? But yeah. Hey, Steve, is there something here that we should protect that they shouldn't get their hands on because that wizard kind of told me something but he was cut off? Could you like tell me about that? That would be grand. And now you might start thinking, well, wait, why don't we just, you know, talk to Wonder Woman and wait for it because that's exactly what Shazam says. Like, hey, why don't we contact Wonder Woman? She's like a demigod, so it kind of counts and then nothing happens and they don't. Yeah, they don't even mention it. And she's the God that reignites the fucking thing at the end. So, you know, yes, it would have counted and you could have brought her in, but you just didn't. Don't know why. Well, never know why. Wait, it might actually be worse. Aren't they implying that at the end that he actually did send one of these letters but it just took her that long to get there? Or does she say she didn't get one of the letters? I don't remember. I don't think she mentions it, but you could infer that's why she is there at that time but that, you're right, doesn't make it way worse. No, there you go. So, that means she just didn't get involved until it was safe. She was like a dome, been there, done that. Yeah, we, oh, they start writing. I guess we'll not talk about what they've written until it gets read. So, Freddie and the Wizard have brought to the sisters. Don't know why it took so long. What were they in the cells for? What were the sisters doing? They came home, sat down and then they just waited for a bit until they got Freddie and the Wizard. What's going on? They waited for the other scene to be over. Oh, okay, that's nice of them. Yeah. So, Helen Mirren opens with, are the other champions children like yourself? And then Freddie says no, no one's stupid enough to grant primordial powers to kids, which is a really weird line because you're right there. Yeah, they already saw you, you know. Like, as much as he's kind of tongue in cheek, it's just like, yeah, but that doesn't work. You have the power, you fool. And then if you wanted to be like, well, be fair, he was given it by the other kid. Like, yeah, but that's pretty much the same for all of them. So, you know, like the only one that was given it by a wizard was Billy, but whatever, that's gonna change by the end of this movie. And she says, give us their names. And he goes, okay, well, there's Brett Breyer and Bit Breyer, you were writing this down? And then, Anthea's like, he's lying. And I just saw to myself like, man, they're asking him to give the names and they're not forcing him to, like with the magical mind control. So, he could actually have just gone away with saying like, okay, promise you won't hurt them, okay? And then they go, yeah, and then you go, right. And then you can name people who either don't exist or maybe people who like, could actually deal with them. Like, if you said, I don't know, I guess you can't do this, but if he said Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent. It's like, especially Clark Kent. But yeah, you know, it's like, oh well. But even, because it's kind of fucked up, he says Brett Breyer and Bit Breyer, because if they actually went after the bullies, that's who he's naming and killed them. Like, oh. Right. Oh, whoops, whoops to do. No, the movie were like, see, they got their comeuppance, those bad bullies. They got killed by the gods, like, oh, gods. So then you think, wait, why are they fucking around? Why don't they just use the chaos power, get them to do it? And yeah, that's eventually what happens. Lucy Liu says, I'll just use the power. And it's like, why are we wasting time? They really didn't want to stand up. They really didn't want to stand up. And they were really comfy. And to be clear, they want the names of the other champions that they already saw flying towards them earlier, right? Yes, that's what they're doing here. And we never find out why they don't do anything with the information, because they never get it. I think it might just be bullshit. I really don't know. I can't answer these questions. I can answer a lot of questions, but not all of them. So she's preparing to do the thing and he's like, oh God, what's she gonna do? And the wizard said she has the power of chaos. It enters a man's mind and shatters it whole. But not permanently. That's not chaos. I just don't get it. Yeah, like it's just mind control. Why are you describing it? Is that your way of trying to make it sound chaotic? Sure. So he says, well, my mind is already trashed. So I'd like to see you try. Nobody has the balls to handle my brain. Why is he so cocky? They wrote that. That's a line they wrote. That is a line they wrote. Unfortunately. Yeah. And then he starts like desperately screaming in a way that I was kind of like, damn, this looks like it's pretty heavy. And then he says Destiny's Child did it better. Meaning the land. I missed that. Yeah. Oh. And so I was just like, what? Oh, yeah, he's like screaming, but then he says like, ha, this band sucks. Okay. And then Hella Mirren's like, he's stronger than, he looks, bugs the hell out of me that for some reason Freddie is the one that can resist the chaos mind control of a God. It's like, okay. Why would he be able to do that? No reason. You're a hot. Yeah. Super boosted because of Shazam powers. Is that their idea? Maybe. I don't know. He doesn't have one at this point. Yeah. No, I mean, like there's like some kind of mental thing for, I don't know. I'm just trying to make something up like the movie does. Okay. Come on. It's just like the movie. Damn it. It's a psychological after it. So I can write a Shazam movie. That's what I heard. Guys, guys, the power that was supposed to go to his legs went to his brain and stuff. Oh, no. One more time. Oh, no. The other legs. It's like when you go blind, your other senses take over. Exactly. Exactly. Very good meme. But anyway, such a wide view. But as he's getting there, he starts saying Billy, Billy. And then it's like, oh, shit. You got the first name of the first person. And then the stupid letter arrives and she goes, wait, or stop. And he's like, why? Why? Yeah. You can do both at the same time. You could read while he's saying the names. I think the one who's doing it, you could just read the letter. It's fine. You could just wait to read the letter too. Or that. That's some big brain stuff right there. It's not going anywhere. She reads it. She reads it. Deadpan. Hellamirran. God-style. This was a part that Shad said he found quite funny. What did you guys think? I thought I wanted to die. What? Oh yeah. What was funny? It just goes on and on. And it's just a bunch of gibberish because that stupid pen- Hellamirran is reading the letter. Yeah, yeah. Reading the letter. Yeah, this. And it just goes on and on. It's just gibberish because the pen was just writing down what they were saying and just takes like 30s. You wouldn't entertain it. Yeah. That's what I was finally getting to. It's like, there's no way she would even do that. She's like, that's just bullshit. Stop it. Now go back to the pale. This is a potentially funny idea that's sort of housed in an environment that it just can't exist or make sense. When do you guys remember Knight at the museum too? When the Pharaoh guy, who's the bad guy, he's a bad dude, right? And so they tell him about the cube of Rubik's and how it's like this thing that's got a lot of power and everything. And so he's like, yes, what is this cube of Rubik's? Like that makes some sense because he's being trick and he doesn't know about this stuff and he's inquisitive, but here it's like there's an idea here. But the film is like, why would they send the letter with all of those errors in it? It's like, I don't know. Can I believe that they're all that stupid and they wouldn't make sure that the letter was done right? And of course, Hellamirran, but she wouldn't read it out like that. She's too experienced and wise and sagacious or whatever. I'm proud to read out a bunch of books. Yeah, it just, it wouldn't work. But it's one of those like, like I see the joke, but this isn't the place where this joke can work. Not very good. You have planted the seed in soil where it cannot flourish. Yeah. And is Stephen the pen so dumb that he doesn't understand that they're trying to say, don't write that part, but he just writes it anyway? I think it's more than Stephen. He might be following instructions exactly. Oh, it's that's definitely clear. Okay. I'm gonna take that back. It's definitely more on them, but I think it's also on Steve. Why? What did Steve do wrong? Because he knows everything. He's dictating. But he doesn't know the, when they're saying, no, don't write that that he should be there. He was told to do it though. And besides, just cause he knows everything, if we're gonna go down the road if he knows, route of he knows everything, then I don't know if that one, like, like intentions and what the letter should say and things like that. Cause it's a theoretical letter, but... Well, no, I just mean like, when they say, no, we're not gonna write that part. He continues to write it anyway. It's such a small point. Well, if they had said, if they had said, Steve, don't write that part down, then was that a crow? Did someone just make a crow noise? What? What? Who made a crow sound? What? No, that was my squeaky chair. Okay. I was talking and I thought someone made a, there was like a crow that went, so I didn't know if that was a crow or not. No, I just need a new chair. That's, we can call it the crow chair for now. All right, that's fine. That's fine. I don't know what we're talking about, but yeah. I'm fine to admit that Steve is in the clear. That's... I think you conceded too hard. I'm a little, I've been convinced a little bit by your argument, especially the don't write that. Well, in that case, I'm still right. Well, it depends on what they were, I think it depends the context in which that word was said. Maybe if they said it to the person who was saying it, but I don't know. I don't know. I think it's kind of strange. Move to the next thing, because I find it hyper cringe. The letter ends with the saying, I feel good about this. Me too. Anyone else want a Gatorade? Do we have red? He reads that and it's just like a joke. And then don't know why they did this, but Lucy Liu angrily charges at Freddie and says, what is this Gatorade? Is it a weapon? I don't know. It's like, look, Lucy, it doesn't even make sense in the context of which she read it. Anyone else want a Gatorade? Do we have red? That doesn't sound at all like they're preparing a weapon. What do you mean? No, that's dumb shit. And it's like, how's we get it? Cause it's culture difference. And you're like, no, shut up. Stop it. Down. Stop it. Enough. And then he's like, sister, they have suggested a deal and we will meet, but the humans are not to be trusted. And where are you going? Well, to get herself deliberately caught, right? That's her next plan so that she can get the seed, but she could have done that at any point anyway. Anyway, they leave, they go, fuck this. They leave the wizard and Freddie to die in the dragon pit. It's like, you've not done anything with the wizard this whole time after he repaired the staff. Why didn't you kill him? That's what I was kind of referring to. They decided to kill him now. They were Freddie. They could have gotten the names of the heroes if they wanted, but they only got the first name of one of them and then they killed him. Well, you know, right. I don't get it. I don't know that makes sense. It feels like we've forgotten their motives again. Fine, Laura. And so they get dropped into the guardian of the Garden of Atlas's pit where he paralyzes people with fear and then eats them, I guess, or burns them. Or what? You know, either whatever. Something like that. He takes a long ass time to do it though. Yeah. But before he can beat them, he's about to, he's about to do it. Axis Lady changes the whole nature of the entire building, I guess. And you can see that the dragon slams into a wall and she saves them from it. And it's just kind of like, so there she goes again, just changing the physics of, well, not the physics, the physical world to her whims. And nobody notices this building except for the people involved. Somehow. Yeah, that's what it says. Affordable housing, she could single-handedly create. I guess if her world's destroyed and they're like the only people in it, there's a lot of affordable housing. Well, yeah, but if she hangs out in the regular human world, you could just get a bunch of materials and put them down, and she can make some buildings. How about they be up to code? He says, Freddie says hero to her, just like she did to him earlier in the film because of the thing with the bullies. And then that's where she said, and I'm focusing on something else this time, because to be fair, I didn't actually need your protection. I was going to rearrange those boys and tittle organs when you stopped it. And I was just like, why did you put that in there? Was it, did you need to do that? I think I thought it was funny. I think that's it. Yeah, there's like, And it's a little bit of, oh, by the way, I didn't need to be saved. That's what I mean. That's the part where I'm just like, you could have, didn't need like, you're trying to appreciate each other for the good things you've both done. And then she's like, to be fair though, I didn't need you to let you know. It's like, yeah, I don't need you Steve. Just to be clear, I'm a woman and women don't need to be saved by men. I just want to get back to that. Yeah, I'll have you know. She gets opium shit when she loses her powers though. Is heroes then? No, she has nets. Oh no. Like this would have been more enduring, endearing, sorry. Though I did endure. This would have been more endearing if Freddie was the one to point out that she didn't need saving. And she didn't feel the need to point that out because it was the intention and all that, but because she points it out, it kind of kills what they were trying to go for with this scene, unfortunately. Yeah, just felt off to me and it's like, oh well, whatever you were building there, feels kind of stilted now. So Shazam meets up with Helen Mirren with the expectation of the trade being, he said in the letter that he'd give up his power and all of his family's powers in exchange for Freddie. And so Helen Mirren assumes to agree with that. But of course he's going to bring a trap that involves capturing Helen Mirren. That's his idea. And so the conversation begins with him saying, quiet what she is, because she arrives without him realizing. And then she says in response, I find it the most effective way to slit an enemy's throat. God, she's so cringe. She's my new sonic, you'll see. I don't know why we still have these characters. What the hell's going on? Like if you wanna make an evil for evil's sake, evil, evil, but the last wish just showed you how to do it. Yeah. Don't copy them. Because what the hell is this? Wow, you just turned up without making a sound. She's like, I like to slice my enemy's throats with silence. It helps me murder. All right. Yeah, then he says you're upset. Wizards took your powers or whatever, but like you're taking this pretty personally. She says if thieves stole your coin at night and fled, you would give chase, would you not? And let's say they dropped the money on the ground and your neighbor picked it up and kept it. Now imagine it's not money, but the lifeblood of your father and the last breath of your mother and the power of all the gods, the magic of the entire realm. And now this magic courses through you and you have the goal to believe you deserve it. And I was just thinking about like, oh, there's a lot in there that we can use. That's kind of interesting. Mm-hmm. Yeah. The analogy is a bit long, but yeah, like there's a thing to talk about here. There's like a thing here. Does magic belong to anybody if it can be moved from one person to another? Who originally has it? There's a conversation on that. There's the whole like, Atlas is dead and so all these powers belong to several gods that are gone. So who does it pass to? Is it like bloodlines or is it just rights by being a god or can it be people who save lives? We've saved loads of lives. And by the way, Helen Mirren seems to have some recognition of lives. This will come up in a second. I'll have a quote for it, but just keep it in mind that like that's something she does seem to care about. And then she said, like character wise, you think you deserve it. We know Billy doesn't. So that's something to talk about as well. We don't talk about any of these things. No. What he says in response is, you're very menacing and that goes a long way. But today I wanted to talk about compromise. And then she says, there is no compromise. And he goes, I knew you'd say that. Wisdom of Saruman. This is like slamming his name out of your goddamn mouth. It's so fucking painful. There's no actual conversation. It's just fuckery. Yep. So yeah, Sam is so stupid. Yeah, he's so stupid. Unreal. So he says, give us back Freddie. Take down the dome and we won't have to annihilate you. Then she says, you play the part of a man, but you don't play it well. Give us the powers. You're no leader. You're a lost boy who likes to make believe he's a warrior. Now like, hey, it's opened up again. A chance to have that conversation, right? Like it's almost like we reset again after the goofy. It's like, all right now, dude, come on, come on. And then she already says, oh yeah. Well, I've seen all the fast and furious movies, lady. And it's all about family. Slam. And then walk with silence and then she even looks around and is like, oh, what's, what's going on? Where's, you know, where are we at? And the meme is the family turn up on time. Ha ha. But then they do start up. I mean, that was family. That was the signal, guys. We discussed this and then they show up. Again, another first draft. That joke happens again later when he's like, he's talking to, he wants Helen Mirren to do something. She doesn't do it straight away. And he starts repeating. She's like, please don't do this joke again. I'm so tired. And yeah, it's like, you have that chance again, then you just go hyper goofy mode. And some people like, did they actually say that? I was like, yes, that's a quote. That's one to one. It's really fucking annoying and lame. I think he even says like family three times because they don't show up. So you really, really get it. If you didn't get it, you get it. And so he's like, you forgot about my family, didn't you, goddess? I was like, why would she, her whole intention here is to collect their powers. I mean, she forgot about them. And then she says, no, you forgot about mine. And then Lucy Liu surprised Zaps of Pedro. So he's lost his powers now. Remember, he's bad at dodging. But the thing is, it doesn't really work because he didn't even know she was there. Like there was no attempt to dodge. He just got hit. And yeah, so, and this is again, it's like a filming thing. Lucy Liu hits one of them, powers gone. And then we show like him falling over going, oh no, I've lost my powers. And then we show Helen Mirren and she kicks out Shazam. He flings across the room. And then we show Mary looking at Pedro going, oh no, Pedro, like, are you okay? Well, the others are looking around. What's Lucy Liu doing? Fire again. They're all there. It's a big problem with this film and a lot of its action scenes is that there would just be moments where people are like standing around and they don't really know what to do. It's like they had no direction. They didn't know how to account for them. You've got a lot of people in the scene at any given time. And like the camera focuses on one thing that's happening and then it's like everything else is on pause while that's going on. Really annoying. Yes, it's just not, it's not good. It's an easy win. There's an especially egregious example of this later. Let's go like zap, zap, zap, donzo. Yeah. So then two of them, yeah, one of them runs up to attack Lucy Liu. She gets distracted and then the other one zaps her with electric and she flings across the room and gets, I presume, knocked out for the next five minutes because you don't see her at all until she gets back out of there. Which tells me it's like you could have taken the staff that whole time. Yeah, she's gone for like minutes. That staff has the power to just take powers away from people. If you grab it and take her powers off her, you nullify her. That'd be pretty good. That'd be very good. Oh well. Yeah, it annoys me, by the way. Helen Mirren, like she grabs the tables in front of him and flings it and then kicks Shazam and he flings across the room and it's like, again, you have super speed, my dude. She doesn't. I was just, keep surprising you. Why does everything surprise you guys? And if they surprise you, why do you need so long to come back? You just go like, ah, then you're back. I would judge this choreography-wise, the fight between Helen Mirren and the three God, whether the three Shazams, but it doesn't, she wants to get caught. So you can kind of dismiss any dumb thing she does throughout it as that, which she does a lot of dumb shit, but she wants to be caught. So she wants to come across as though she's being knocked out and that they can take her away. So we'll give them that, right? But it gets way worse for that. One of the lines she has, though, if I'm curious, referencing earlier, she says, we've taken the power from two of you already and now two of you must die and for what? So you can keep playing soldier. So she thinks it's bad that people would die, even humans. Yeah, it stains that white. That is the whole film that I was just like, why don't we get into that? Hello? Helen Mirren's character seems to actually- Let's have a chat about this potentially interesting thing. She resents humans for taking the power, but she seems to be against killing them. A super interesting thing. Oh, we don't, anything. So yeah. We assume she pretends to be knocked out and they take them all to the Rock of Eternity before Lucy Loot can get to it. Through one of the secret doors and you're like, okay. And then I think that was the time to talk about it. You're like, they can go to the Rock of Eternity. You're like, yeah. And the Rock of Eternity has a series of doors that lead to all places in the world. Yeah. So the dome really isn't doing anything to them. Yeah. I guess not unless they haven't mapped out another place where they can always know they have to go for the- Well, yeah, they know about the labyrinth door, but if they, I'm trying to think of, if they've ever been through a door in the film that led to another place on earth, but they must be one and they can all search through the millions of doors themselves until they find one. Yeah. Oh yeah, I don't know. I just thought that that's just something that casually happens. It's just like, wow, that really does cancel out the pain of the dome. You could even get civilians through that way, right? Like out of the dome, but. Oh, yeah. And also if you can open the entrance in a porta-potty, surely you can then change where that entrance is to being outside the dome, even if you're not thinking about all the other doors. Well, you could move the porta-potty places. Well, yeah. It's in the name. You open the door. From the Latin porto, which means to carry. You get like 200 civilians into the room, close it, and then you have some other shazam open it outside the dome, because they would have gone outside at that point to then connect it back to the rock of eternity's entrance, right? Like, there's so many mechanics that they don't care to even think about. Anyway, so she pretends to be knocked out. And I don't know. I was so lost at this point in the film, so I thought I'd missed something. They just put it behind metal bars in the rock of eternity. The woman who can literally control everything with telekinesis down to its elements, like. Yeah, a god who can punch shazam and beat them up and make them fly across places and like, yep, this just metal cage door. This'll be enough, whatever. Yeah, it's gonna be enough. I don't know. We're just gonna all leave and no one's gonna stay to watch her. Surely the film doesn't... Why did they make us think that all of them thought that she was fine in a just normal cage? Why? I don't know. I don't think they're that stupid. I mean, they are kids, but like, damn. I just don't get it. There's nothing in the film that implies that that would ever work at all and they just believe it will. That's that. And of course, she breaks out immediately with her powers. What? Maybe two minutes later. I seriously want to know from David directly, like, what's going on, man? I don't have anything for this one. As an audience member, what am I supposed to think? What did you want me to think? Yeah. The other things we've kind of able to speculate, but this one, I've got nothing. I really have nothing at all. I've got no clue. I don't know. I guess it's just really shit writing. It's not like any of the other examples like Skyfall or Dark Knight or Loki in Avengers. Where you can understand how they were going to be doing some stuff. Obviously, the shaky ones are best in some of those examples too, but this one, nothing. Gonna work with it. All they say to her is, Freddy, for the staff and your freedom, and stop the dome. Okay. And then we cut to them writing up another letter and they want to send it to the remaining two sisters and he goes, dear daughters of ass, hatless, ha-ha, boom. God, I hate this so much. We need a teenage consultant. We really do. Like just give them the script. So like, do you speak like this? No. No, it's cringe. I've never talked like that. Who wrote this? Who wrote this? Yeah, and as a doll is walking away, she's gonna get some food for the prisoner here in the background, him saying, man, Steve's grammar makes me sound so much smarter. Also, how are you guys sisters? The age difference is noticeable and slightly upsetting, not gonna lie. That's upsetting. I'm not sure. I don't know, I guess, like they should all, like how come Helen Mirren looks like the old lady and Lucy Liu looks like a middle-aged lady and thea looks like a young chick? It's like that, that's a little unfair, I guess, you know? Well, you know. Yeah, I did wonder that. Very different times, right? I guess, that's ultimately consequential, but I did have that thought when I was watching it too. I'm like, oh, they're sisters? Oh, okay, I'm, all right. Also, as someone pointed out, they literally had teenagers on set, they could have consulted. That's funny. Oh yeah, you're right. When they had the kids say like, do we have to play war games when he's talking about a FPS? I was just like, so does that kid just not play video games? Cause he could have told them. It's gonna be like, we don't call them that. Yeah, call them Judy, it's called a war game. Hey guys, you want to play the war games tonight? You're like, what are you, I'm sick of war games. Why do we always have to use guns? Hello, fellow teenagers. That's what I mean, just like, let's play Halo. It's like another war game. You're like, oh, it's a gun. I just feel like, are you okay? So yeah, she obviously breaks out and she goes to get the apple. And then they're all panicking. They're like, where could she be? Where did she go? It's like, man, if only we all had super speed and we could check the whole fucking rock immediately. Oh well, nope. They hear a noise and they run into the room of doors and they realize that's where she's escaped. So yeah. And now you're thinking to yourselves, wait, why did she need to be captured to go to the rock of eternity? It's like, well, because she can't go to the rock of eternity. Why? Well, because- Reasons. So this is a genuine thing for me. Sometimes like, is it that there's a barrier for her to walk in herself? She has to be carried in by one of these guys? Is that what they're trying to say? Why would that be? Or are they trying to say that she can't open the door to the rock of eternity? She needs to get one of them to do it so that she can go then through the door. It's like, that makes the most sense. Like, no, that can't be it. Cause there's a literal fucking door in their labyrinth that leads directly to the rock of eternity. So no, I don't know. It's awkward. I have no clue. Considering how she- That door is always to the labyrinth. It never changes because even the guy says, no, that just leads to a labyrinth that goes nowhere. It's like, it clearly doesn't go nowhere. What do you mean? I don't know why he's just saying that the labyrinth goes nowhere. You have to just check out the whole thing. That's what mapping means. Yeah, it does blow my mind that he could have run into the sisters of Atlas so much earlier, or he could have run into the wizards so much earlier. Holy fuck. That's pretty funny. So, how does she get from her original realm to Earth? Walked, but she can't get to the rock of eternity. Yeah, you can't walk there. Yeah, you can't get there for walking cause you can't walk there. Of course you can walk from the god realm to the human realm. You can't walk for the human realm to the rock of eternity. Yeah, the rock of eternity is a special place. It's different. I don't know. And then, yeah, one of the characters goes, I thought we brought her in too easily. She wanted to get caught. Thanks. It's so tropy. All right. You should have said something. You should have mentioned it. Like, guys, this seems really easy, what we just did. I thought that'd be more difficult. We'd have a bit more of a struggle there. When they broke out the wizard, sorry, when Anthea broke out the wizard and Freddy from Spooky Dragon, he said that they need to follow the instructions that are going right, left, left, and then follow the right wall to the door. They forgot these instructions somehow and get lost. Yeah. And then he's lost. We remembered it and we had to watch a movie. Yeah. Right. Yeah, this wasn't, our lives wasn't dependent on this information. So, yeah, he's like, oh, we're lost. Thanks, Bozo. And then he goes, who's the wizard here? Why is the wizard talking like that? Why wouldn't the wizard be like, shut the fuck up? Because it's that terrible modern writing where everyone speaks in these contemporary ways. No one seems wise or aged. At least Rings of Power tried. Did try. That's right. They tried. Bad. But yeah, then they clearly aren't following the right wall and they end up at the door. Really annoyed me because I was like, that's the one thing I never remember saying. It's like, yeah, well, fuck you. Fuck you for paying attention. And then Helen Mirren walks through that very door that they just arrived at with the golden apple and they hide and they're like, oh no, she has the golden apple. She's not supposed to have that. That's supposed to be in a safe place. And they both look at each other and they go, Billy, like Billy fucked up and she got the apple. It's like, did you tell him? Did you tell him about the apple? You cunt? Why'd you keep doing this? Like there's always important items that you just don't tell them the value of. When they get lost you let go. It's like a game and no one tells you the rules. And they're like, yeah, of course I failed. You didn't tell me the rules. Sorry, I didn't know a bishop could only move diagonally. How was I supposed to guess that shit? He doesn't even look like a bishop. Fuck you. Oh, this is actually, it's much worse than I thought it was, right? So they see all the doors in front of them and they sign to test them out and it's not working out well. And then Shazam walks up to the door, the one we need. And the guy goes, oh, don't need to worry about that one. That one just leaves to a labyrinth with nothing in it, which we said was really dumb. The dead berry says, wait, like a Greek labyrinth? Oh my God. I'm gonna give a shit about things being Greek. Oh, it's just like fucking hell. Many kinds of labyrinths. Like theseus. And again, like it wasn't bad enough. Shazam then says, guys, I smell porta-party. Meaning, they went through the porta-party door which got a smell onto Helen Mirren that followed through to that door. Is that what they're suggesting? Yeah, but what's stupid because there's no porta-party in there. There's no poop. There's no poop to stank. Right. But what a fitting metaphor. It's just a plastic. To stank. Yeah, but what a fitting metaphor for this film. Follow the stink of shit and you will find your plot. Oh my God. And the reveal is they never find it. Yeah. Oh. So yeah, the apple, they've got it and they are all arrived, all three of them. And she's like, it's over, sisters. We can restore our realm. It's because I've already said how bad Lucy Lou is. So Helen Mirren says that and then Lucy Lou goes, oh, we planted it there as a destroy their realm. That's just like why? Why? Why did you do that? What's so evil? And yeah, then Andy is like, no, that's not what we agreed to. And it's just like, why would you even? You've got one apple. Restore your realm. Why would you want to do it? Especially when you know that that's gonna be good for you and putting it in earth, you know, I don't know that that's gonna pan out very well. Oh. And I mean, as we see it doesn't. So they're arguing over what to do with the apple and it pans over to the front door where the wizard and Freddie are because they're gonna be like, okay, we're gonna steal it. And so Freddie goes to steal it. And it's like, what the fuck? And you might as an audience member be like, why the fuck's Freddie doing it? The wizard should do it, obviously. And you might think, as the writer does, oh, right, you shouldn't go, I should go. And Freddie says, oh, because the cripple doesn't know, he's not exactly some good sneak thief. Is that why? And I was thinking to myself like, it's not even just that you've got one leg that doesn't work perfectly about it. You're a kid, he's an adult. Yeah. But like, we didn't even remember that. The writers don't even thinking about that. They're just like, oh, whatever, because of his bad leg. He's like, oh, but yes, also that makes you bad at speaking. Yeah, probably is a little bit of a dexterity penalty here. And so he says, yeah, okay, like one of my legs is too great, but your knees make crackling noises whenever you walk. And then the wizard like kneels and he goes. It's like, where was that a thing? Right now, right now, exactly. Yeah, so insanity. I just think it's funny that the writer was like, oh, they'll take issue with this because he's crippled. It's like, child, like he should probably not be dealing with all this shit. I guess he's he's 17, but still the wizard should probably do it, but never mind. We're going to get him. And so they continue arguing and they say, if you plant the apple in earth, it will it'll disfigure into something monstrous. OK, take that as information on its own. It's like, ah, well, the obvious thing then is to plant it in our realm to restore it. Give us nice, happy flowers, sunshine, whatever. That's that's what it does. We see it do it later. We will definitely not be planting it in an earth if it all it'll do is destroy earth and give us nothing like the why. Yeah, it seems like a waste of that apple. But what does Lucie say that our love for our own realm is greater than our hatred for the humans from thousands of years ago? We can only assume. Yeah. Or not, or whatever. Maybe further back, we know, actually, no, be thousands. Yeah, we talked a little bit about how in really, really bad scripts, human beings just don't talk to each other or people don't talk to each other like people. So Lucy Lou's response is that's so remember, it would disfigure into something monstrous. He says that's what humans are. It's only fitting that we bring our monsters to their world and do to them what they did to us. Or you could just go home. Yeah, you couldn't. Yeah. So I mean, it's like, oh, you're like insane. What kind of you're just like cartoonishly evil and I can't take you seriously has gone well beyond. We can restore our why don't you care about our realm? What's going on? Like, I am just so angry and vengeful. You're like, no, this is just clown stuff. Like, well, come on, work with me. It's like, oh, stupid. And then she falls up with all humans of villains as evil humans. Yeah, riveting character in Lucy Lou, you think. She says they actually pray for the gods to absolve them for order, for peace, what all they do is dismantle in return. And then Haliburin's like, Anthea, I want you to take the apple and plant it in our garden. Like, basically ignoring Lucy Lou. And it's like, unfortunately, that's when Freddie knocks shit over and reveals that he's actually trying to steal the apple, meaning that had the wizard done it, it would have worked out just fine. I can't believe they actually made the knocking over thing. It's like, really? She was about to turn around anyway. Like, you didn't need this. Just having a bad timing thing or whatever. Don't not funny. Stop it. And then Lucy Lou is like, you see, you put your trust in Anthea and she betrays us. I guess she's talking about the fact that you must have figured that Anthea let them out of the dragon pit. Yeah, apparently, yes. So then Haliburin goes to kill Freddie and he's like panicking. He's like, oh, no. And then they all go, wait, what's that? And they all look over at the the violin that's on fire. Because that was from rock fraternity. Yeah, I don't know. They just put that there for the lulz. Well, they said it's to distract them so you can use a super speed to grab the the staff. It's like that anyway. Super speed really seem like it requires much of it. So you waste the time just getting it stupid violin all the way here. Even better than that, they super sped in to drop the violin and super sped out, waited for them to be distracted by it and then super sped in to steal the staff. How fucking dumb is that? Super dumb. The big dumb even it's even it's even clunkier than that because they're distracted by a flaming violin in a room with a whole bunch of other flames going. So it's not even all that visually. Yeah, like it's not unique in a room or is unique, but not like, you know, in a broad sense. Yeah, in the rock of eternity, it stands out a lot more because it's all gray rock and everything in that chamber, not so much. Stupid. Anyway, they've got the staff now. Like, holy shit. All right. Well, that was it was actually kind of easy. And then one of the most frustrating parts to use that. Yeah, he wants to toss it to Freddy so that Freddy can say Shazam with it and get his powers back. He might be thinking, why don't we just get everyone out? That's probably the better thing to do. Because you're super speedy. That would be a great idea. We should do that in your play. We should do that instead. But you know, Shazam's like, nope, I will throw this to Freddy and then he will do that. Throws it and Lucy Lou just, it honestly looks like she just extends her arm a little bit and just grabs it. Yeah. The scene is literally like. It's very confusing. Hellermen has the staff. Shazam goes, I've got it now. And then throws it and Lucy Lou just takes it as though he threw it to her. And you sit there as an audience member like, what? Why? Why? Like you didn't even need to like jump or get in the way. He's like, oh, cool. Thank you. It was just a terrible idea. And then she sounds just like, oh. And the wizards. Oh yeah, oh yeah. Not like it's a big deal or anything. I think wizards says, Freddy the crutch and he puts the crutch on the staff which counts as touching it, I guess. And says Shazam. I don't know about that. I don't know about that. I don't believe it 100%. I wonder if you put the staff on the ground and then everyone says Shazam. I'm saying to everyone. Cause like does the crutch recognize that the crutch is like an extension of you? No, yeah. That's how I signal it is to him. It'd be like if it fell on your car and you said Shazam and then you turned into Shazam. Turned into a transformer. But your car's actually protects you from the lightning so it probably wouldn't work. Oh, that's tough. Yeah, this is magic lightning. And you raise a valid point, how far does this go? Do I put it on the ground and that is connected to the earth which is connected to the buildings which is connected to the ocean which is connected to everything else which is connected to everything else. Can anyone on earth say Shazam once that staff touches the ground? Or if holding the staff, if you're holding the staff. Yeah, anyone can become Captain Marvel. Well, the earth gets a big old lightning symbol on it because it's a Shazam now. Yeah, it's John Shazam. Yeah. Yeah. You fight on earth. John Shazam. So anyway, with that blunder, Freddy just zooms out. Shazam zooms out with the wizard and the three sisters are like boo. But they have the staff, of course, and the apple. But, you know, overall, that's that's the stakes now, even though it's just completely fucking switches everything all the time. Hard to pay attention, exactly. Um, yeah, which moves us to guess the next act. I think. Right. So. They, yeah, yeah, you have Helen Mirren say Calypso, you are not fit to wheel this staff and takes it off her. And she takes it back off Helen Mirren and says, I'm more fit than you. You had them in your hands and you did nothing. Our sole purpose is to avenge our father, but everyone here has become weak. You know, you're weak. So she's the dragon, the big wood dragon to attack earth. And Helen Mirren disagrees with her with the staff, the dragon, people dying needlessly. There's nothing. There's nothing. Now, like, okay. And you all know, because you've seen it. I mean, people, well, you know what happens to Helen Mirren? The next thing, time she screen time. So they're curious, right? Like, what is she doing? Why shouldn't you? Is she doing it? Trying harder to stop this from happening. Kind of weird. All right. Very important. So kind of doesn't make any sense at all, but whatever. They would have super spared down into the labyrinth, gone through that door and into the room of doors. Right. That's where they are. But the dragon's been summoned. And so it shows us them getting out of that door and the dragon burst through it himself into the rock of eternity. But again, I'm just like, so there is nothing stopping you from going from there to the rock of eternity. You can just go through, even if you're a fucking huge ass dragon, I guess. How does the dragon fit through? I don't really say that. That's what I was thinking as well. Yeah, it looks like it's like that's the Troy. Do you figure if you destroy the door, you destroy the portal? Yeah. Yeah. Well, you see the dragon sucked in. Uh-huh. It's nearly. Now it all makes sense. Apparently you can make these portals bigger, which would actually be even easier to get people through it then. That's nice. Every time you say the room of doors, I keep thinking like, oh, does he mean a hallway? Oh no, no, it's actually a room full of doors. Okay. So do they now just have like a doorway that's constantly open to the godly place? Yeah. Because it's broken? Yeah. Great. Okay, just to hang out there. They then open up a door to Earth and all get out and it's their house. I don't know why, since they can choose from what I remember. I don't know why they did that because it's just gonna endanger their parents. And so they quick thinkingly with the dragon on literally on their tail, they go, they run into the parents' room and they're like, okay, parents, calm down. Don't freak out. I'm Billy. He just goes, guys, it's no time for secrets, okay? We have to tell them the truth. Can you say a dragon literally on their tail, Mahler? Yeah. That's the phrase, that's what it means. Literally on their tail. That's, I don't accept it. Yeah, on their tail, it refers to like right behind you. Madness. Oh, some might say they're on the tail when they're not really that close. I'm saying they are that close. Yeah, but that wouldn't be literally on their tail. No, that's different. I'm not referring to that literally. But literally of that meaning of that phrase. Literally figuratively. No, on their tail refers to when someone's right behind you. Yeah, figurative. I'm not saying like on their literal tails. That's madness. Well, how do you distinguish between being right behind them as in on their tail or being on their tail as in chasing them? Well, as long as they aren't literally on someone's tail, it's not literal either way. Well, that's how that, I mean, that's the thing with English language, right? On their tail means right behind. It's figurative. I mean, like I said, how do you draw the difference between on their tail as in chasing versus on their tail as in right behind? No, it's fine to have the distinction between those two things. But when you say literally, now that completely overshadows everything. Now, literally, you have to be on someone's tail. So what weird am I supposed to use when I'm trying to say they are right on them instead of facing them? Oh, I guess you could say right on their tail. You could say they're on their tail, that's fine. But if you say literally on their tail, I was like, well, then it's, then we've added literal to the mix. Yeah, what word should I use? Well, right on their tail. Just say he's on their tail. Well, right on their tail, right on their tail, the right is the emphasis point. Or else, because if you're using the phrase right on their tail in a figurative sense, which you were, but then you say literally, then essentially what you're made, literally the figurative thing. I wanted to know. But the figurative thing went literally. All I want it known is that it's like a meter away as opposed to several. Or like, you think that literally would imply that it's closer necessarily? Yeah, because on their tail, in this instance, referring to just on them. But if they don't have a tail to be on? No, I know. It's right behind them. Which they're like, somebody's like, my issue is that I'll be two minutes and then they said I'll literally be two minutes. Does that imply that it is going to be a fast two minutes? Or does it mean exactly two minutes? Well, yeah, because the first one could have been five, right? Because if you say I'll just be a few minutes, right? Or I'll just be a second. I'll just be a second. Literally one minute, you know, that implies that it will actually be a minute. That is a really great example. That's how I'm using it. When someone says I'll literally be two minutes, I don't think they mean they're gonna be a passage of time. I think they mean accurately two minutes. Yeah, and I think that's the same principles applied here. Yeah, I'm saying I think we don't need to draw it that hard for colloquial English. I don't know, I really like my literals. I really like them. I'm just really glad that example's there because I actually would wanna keep that one. If I say I'm literally gonna be two minutes and someone goes, you're not literally two minutes. So your position, because for me, this is an element of how does the word literally get applied to figurative language because those things are in opposition to each other. And I think that literal should supersede the figurative meanings that have been used. I understand, but the way this seems to have happened is like when you have, I'll be two minutes or I'll be right behind or I'll be these different things. A lot of the time people can mean them to mean much further away than what is implied by the statement. So a literal almost being read is how read is how understood, meaning on their tail as in right on them or be two minutes as in 120 seconds. I wouldn't want you to interpret anything else. And if someone said, yeah, well, now I'm interpreting that your time, I'd be like, no, you're not. I get where you're coming from, but I think that literal will still supersede the figurative uses of those phrases. I understand, and I think that's. All right, well, the point is the dragon eats the bed for some reason, I don't know fucking idea why. I'm leading to the gay, I'm actually heading to the gay. Oh yeah, you're right, they have the gay thing. The thing about this is the dragon is shown in a moment to burst out right in front of them, right? And theoretically he's chasing them, you don't see it, but I'm assuming he's chasing them through the rock of eternities. So he's right behind them, seconds away. He's on their feet, literally. And so they should not have time to go up, especially by the way, cause not all of them are supersede. They burst into the parents room, like one by one sort of thing, like people, not like supersede, but the dragon's gotta be right here, right? Then they have dialogue back forth, back forth, back forth until he says, guys, no time for secrets, we have to tell him the truth. And they all announce we're superheroes, except for Pedro says, I'm gay. And like that to me is parody levels. I would put that in little Britain or something. So that sounds funny as fuck. But in the superhero, in the serious superhero movies, like you guys do not have the time of, why would he say that then and there? Like, obviously he's not referring to, let's announce that we're gay if need be, like what are you, and then of course, all the other characters go, we know, man. Yeah, it's okay. Yeah, it's fine. And he goes, you knew? And he goes, yeah. Like, it's a dragon. This is a fucking dragon. And the scene, This should not be on your mind at all right now. You should just be dragon. It shouldn't have been the dragon of India by now. He should have killed a bull. Yeah, that too. And then I think one of the characters is like, guys, dragon. And then there's like, what do you mean dragon? And then he goes, it's the bed. Which is like, oh, I was lucky. Only it, you know, did, if it just breathed fire in that direction, it'll be fucked or on super people would be fucked, but by the way, I'm still a little bit confused how this does Rock of Eternity works. Where did they come out from now? How do they get there and come back? I'm still not sure how that works. It's like the staircase or something. Best faith interpretation. They have to do some weird spell carving thing, if you remember to get into. In the first film, yeah. So when they first went to the Rock of Eternity, they did it through the, like their little closet door but maybe underneath the stairs, whatever. Okay, this is another door. And then they go into the door, room of doors to get to the guard realm. So when they came back, they could then use their primary Rock of Eternity door to get back into earth. What I was trying to say was you should have someone go through there, super speed over some other place that's abandoned with the door and then open that one up to the Rock of Eternity. That would be the reasonable and moral thing to do instead of dragging a dinosaur vampire, horrifying fear demon into this suburbia. Refinantial area. Like it's, yeah. Which means that door is also destroyed now, by the way. Which I have to close somehow in the aftermath. Well, we know they cast a spell and it all reassembles. So that's it. Okay. Like I said, I don't know. I just think it's so bad that that's how they implement a gay character. They've been marketing it with that, by the way. The film, they've been like, we have a gay character and we're gonna be, we're not gonna hide him. We're gonna be, it's gonna be part of the film that he said, apparently they fought for that scene. They fought for that scene. I was just like, what are you talking about? It's goofy. They're not gonna hide him. And the thing is, there's something to be said about if he felt it was like that big a deal to sort of come out to his family, it probably would be worthwhile if the family were like recognized that it mattered to him a lot rather than kind of just glossing over it. Yeah. Or maybe he's not. It's just like, oh yeah, we know it's cool. It's like, well, I mean, well, I get what they were doing. I'm like, yeah, I mean, it's, you know, whatever, man. Like it's fine. You know, like I know that that was what the thinking was, but if that character was that, you know, like he felt like he needed to get off his chest, it might be worthwhile to have more of a discussion with him. The problem is that they inserted it here in the middle of the dragon thing. Yeah. There's no time for grief. So it gets like the, like the weaknesses of both. Yeah. Yeah, kind of the weakness of the both worlds. Yeah. Yeah. Now that he said this. You can't say it anyway because there's a dragon coming and you can't have the parents like really accepting him for it in an earnest way because there is a dragon coming. You don't have the time to do it. Yeah. We're owed the moment now where the mom says like, why did you feel like you had to hide that? Did we ever give it an impression of an environment that we wouldn't accept that? So I'd hate to think that you felt, you know, blah, blah, blah. Unfortunately, though, every other kid except for Billy and Freddie don't really get any time at all for anything pertaining to them. They're just sort of there. They're just kind of around. Isn't that everything that matters? It's a whole movie, isn't it? Billy and Freddie. To me, that's the most embarrassing part of all of this. Like Billy, they really didn't exactly know what they were doing with him. The bunch of stuff is thrown at him and then at the end they try and seal it up. It's kind of bad. Is it Freddie? You're really brave and you have a good heart, you know? Yeah, you're a real good guy. That's just, yeah. That's more or less it, yeah. Mary is like, you want to go to college, but you just can't. And then what is the resolution for her anyway? I don't know. I don't actually have anything to say about it. I don't think she had any resolution. Yeah, she did nothing. Dollar and Eugene, nothing. Didn't really have anything at all. And so you're like, so whose laugh is like, well, it's Pedro. What does he have? He's gay. And you're like, oh, they focus on the gay of all of his scenes. You're like, yes, all two of his scenes. They have like, it's all one, all 60 seconds. They focus hard on, you know, how embarrassing. Nobody else's laugh is really anything at all. We got a gay one and we don't hide it for a minute. Well, it's just, none of them are even allowed to be characters because they waste a lot of time. They waste a lot of time that they could be using to develop the other characters. There's no reason why you can't give each of those kids like something for their story. But I mean, yeah, a lot of them are just neglected and a special. And then, yeah, it's like, oh, the plot comes barreling through because we've got to keep moving with this crazy, ridiculous plot. We got a gay one. We got a gay one. God, what really shits me is that you've got, you've literally got a power that causes you to turn into a different person physically. You are literally hiding away your true self. And they also have a gay character and they do nothing to connect these two things and explore it. You know, a level of dysphoria about like, how does he reconcile who he is normally versus who he is as a superhero? And like any and well, all of them would. But I mean, if we're going to if we're going to pick one thing for each character, that seems like a golden opportunity. There's I'm not. He also has the biggest difference between like how in shape he is. Well, that's what I'm talking about, is like maybe he starts feeling insecure about that. I'm not very passionate about the idea like behind Shazam personally. Like as a concept, it's kind of neat. But I mean, if you actually wanted to do something meaningful with a concept of kids who become like superheroes, it feels like there's so many opportunities available to you about like responsibility or identity or any number of those things that this film just doesn't explore. And the other film didn't really either. It's like the surface level is or they act kind of goofy and silly. And that's as far as it goes. Because as you just highlighted, yes, like why would he be the one? Why would he ever want to go back to being the way that he was? He'd stay as a superhero. Wouldn't that be interesting if it was about sort of accepting who he is? You know, and isn't that isn't that like a great opportunity, especially if you want to tie it into him being nervous about coming out? Like that that's something that he sort of is like, yeah, I may this is who I am. And I'm happy with who I am. It seems like an easy like that's easy. You know, like you don't even need many scenes to reinforce that. But you show us that Freddy has serious insecurities about his role in like the world. He's like downtrodden stuff and he can't walk like at his maximum ability. Yet as a superhero, he gets to do things that no one else can at full capacity. He's like, how is he ever going back to being a kid? I don't understand. Because I kind of tried to have that in the first one where he's like, man, Billy, like you, I would want these types of powers and you just like taking it for granted. And now he's got them and they don't really do anything with it. The only thing that they have for his arc is like how it relates to Anthony or like, ah, you're brave. But was that ever really in doubt? Like he was always there the whole time during all of the Shazam stuff. You know, on my first home with the dragon at the house. Oh, here he does. It does not feel like what this is, though, all that character talk that is just like so dragon. Yeah, anyway, I'm going to destroy the house that they just bought. It's going to be great. It's like insurance. Yeah, like insurance for the dragon. Well, they rebuilt it at the end for you. It's great. Oh, so their insurance does cover dragon or they stole all the materials. You know, well, maybe they did. Yeah, who knows. They rebuilt it by hand. Yeah, they fought for that scene and they, you know, and they paraded it around like, look, guys, we did it for real this time. You know, we didn't shy away from it. It's the most tonally incoherent wasted opportunity of a scene. And then it just gets the house gets eaten by a dragon. It's like, well, that's done. We're done with that now. And not about the gay. We have a dragon. They all do the super hero fly away, by the way. And the dragon starts following them. And I just can't handle it. The dragon's like, whoa, whoa, slowly, like sort of rising above the house that starts moving toward them. It's just like you're never catching up with them. No, they can go from like zero to two hundred kilometers per hour instantly, and you're a dragon that has to like build up speed. Yeah, you know, but he always has to go. He's rules. Catches up. It does catch up. But then they just land in a random industrial yard because I guess they didn't have the budget for anywhere more interesting. He, well, he's a ninja, too, if you remember, because the next thing they all land, they're like, oh, yeah. He speaks up on them. The giant dragon, as was mentioned earlier, she hits three of them, one, one, one with the laser. Yeah, good job, guys. Yes, that leaves only two of them left now. Good job. It just sucks. Imagine what the film looks like if she hit Billy. It's like, oh, I guess that's the end of Shazam, the main one. Yep. But now he's the main character, so he's got some good old plot armor really going on there. And he's like, hey, what the apple? Well, here it is. And tosses it to a Mary and she like goes, it's like, yep, never catch it up to her. The dragon goes like, oh, here I go. And then it does catch right next to it. Yeah, it's just like, huh. And then Lucy Lou shoots the laser and somehow she doesn't dodge it. Well, you'd think all you do is circle around super fast and just grab it off her. That's all you got to do. Yep. But no, yeah, she gets hit by the laser because she sucks. How would you get hit by that laser? It's your awkwardness. Oh, and it looks like how they present the thing of like, oh no, Mary's falling and so is the apple. Shazam's got to choose. Oh no. That was so bizarre. It's like, you can't do that. He's super fast. You can get both. All you do is super speed to the apple, super speed to her and slow down when you get to her and then you can save it properly. But this one wouldn't even care about momentum or whiplash. You would just go, boom, boom, both. Yep, that's right. Done and done. But no. They present it as though it's a choice and that he has to choose her over the apple, which. Well, the thing is it becomes a choice because of how long he spends standing there thinking about what he's going to choose. If he had just gotten started, he probably could have gotten them both. Yep. I was just thinking to myself, what if they had played it so that he actually did go grab the apple and she splattered? What would you guys have to say? That'd be interesting if he actually was like, this is great and good and the whole family is like, I can't believe you did that. I can't believe you've done this. I was trying to save the world. I thought I needed to do this, you know? Yep. Too interesting. Get this out of here. That is too interesting. Yeah, there's this idea that a kid may be because they're influenced by all the superhero shows and stuff that they have seen. They do something that doesn't make any sense at all to actually do, but they think it's the right thing. So then, oh, go ahead. Oh, I just want to bounce off something that Springy said about how it could have hit Billy. And that just occurred to me. It's like, wait, he's suffering from imposter syndrome this film and they have something that can take away the one thing that's giving him empowerment but also the thing that's causing his imposter syndrome and they don't use the opportunity to put him in a situation where he's not going to, where he can't rely on his powers. So the problem is that Zachary Levi has top billing. So that's why, because by the way, it's been a while since we've seen Billy play in this film. He's barely in this movie this time around. How much screen time do you think he gets? 10 minutes? Something like that. Maybe. It seems like very little. When he's playing Call of Duty and then when he comes back into the house and then he sits back into the house, like for talking about the, yeah. That's right. The scene at school. And then that's the last time for a while. I was about to say, yeah, and then you get like the end part with the mum and probably less than five minutes. Yeah. Yeah. It was a lot more screen time in the first film. You'd forget that these characters were kids. When I was like, yeah. I feel bad for him because I feel like he's working a lot harder. Like Billy is, he's not that interesting but he is a lot more interesting than Shazam. And it feels like he's trying a lot harder to sort of actually tap into the emotions. Just makes me feel bad. Like I feel like you're working hard and you don't get any time to play this character. The closest I ever felt to feeling anything in this movie is when it's like actual Billy and he's talking about some of the, you know, the issues he's dealing with about losing his family, all that sort of stuff. That's the same in the first film. He's got all of the most emotionally potent and interesting scenes in the film. And then whenever it's Shazam, it's just bullshit. Yeah. Also, I find it a bit funny that as the child actor who plays Billy has gotten over, his jawline is actually getting better than adult Shazam. It's funny that he's got more of the superhero. He's starting to get more of the superhero look going than his adult actor. Just a little funny observation and just realize. The whole thing was on a timer anyway. Like even if they wanted to do Shazam 3, it's like all these people are aging up fast to the point where you've already knocked out one of the adult actors. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Like you probably should have started with him being maybe 10 or 11 years old and then that gives you more runway to have a story be more about them growing up. Well, yeah, but that wouldn't be very interesting, would it? Yeah, well, we want to see that. I want to see a stupid CGI dragon fight. Not any of that pesky character work. He calls it Khaleesi at one point. Ha-ha. Oh, stop. Stop it. Get help. That hurts my face. Something that probably didn't do them any favors is that this film got delayed so many times. Like they all did. Yeah, they started pre-production on this movie in 2021. Yep, they shot it in 2021. Now it's out in 2023. That's wild. Wasn't the reasoning that the VFX needed more time, but the VFX looked like art books? I think what happened was that the initial slate for 2022 was they had the Batman and then I think it was Black Adam in June or July and then The Flash in November, then Aquaman in December and those films and then Shazam was meant to come out around this time and then those films got delayed for visual effects pipeline and they moved Shazam up and it was going to compete with Avatar 2. So they delayed it as well to spread out. I think they need to spread out marketing budget for these films. That's the reason why they're delayed and spread out all these films because they didn't have enough money to pay for the marketing like at each given point in time or I think it was just a budgeting thing or whatever. And isn't it interesting? This was meant to compete against Avatar 2. It's competing against nothing right now and it's only gonna make 30 million domestically, which by the way, I'm pretty sure that Black Adam made that in a day and that was not, like even that was like, oh geez, like it was kind of an expectation to make more. Oh yeah. Geez. Imagine if it competed directly against Avatar 2. I would have been crushed. I can't imagine. That'd be a slyer. I admire that concept though, but geez. It's literally competing against nothing. Like I'm pretty sure. And John Wick 4 comes out like next week. So it's probably the end of that. Yeah. It's not gonna get better, I think. No, of course not. What's the, oh, you mean like the quality of films? Oh, no, I mean the box office. I mean the writing as well. What do you think the word of mouth is gonna be for this film? Nothing. Oh yeah. And then Mario's out like the week after. Yeah. So it's over. Yeah. It's only downhill from here. Oh, something you just, you've highlighted a good point, Fringy, about the age thing where, you know, this is the, again, you know, as we pointed out, this is the kind of character you would want to cast pretty young early like in the first film and then ages slowly over the course of the trilogy or whatever. And the thing is what blows me away is that he was only 10, nine or 10 years old in the source material and they chose to age him up. A decision that has actively fucked them right here because they're having to rush through, you know, to account for the age thing. Yeah, you're just running out of time. Like the longer it goes on, you're just running out of time. So starting them at 14 and then, and then taking four years to get the sequel out, that was not. Dooly, dooly. Yeah, you need it to be quick if you were gonna start them at 14. But yeah, I mean, it's already over anyway, even if they wanted to make a third one, which is probably never gonna happen. It's like you've already run out of time. Well, they could have even, a good director and a good writer could have used this and made something good out of it anyway. Cause clearly there was no sort of thought about how the fact that Billy acts way more mature than Zachary Levi does. I don't even seem to recognize that that's the case. I don't know what that is except for bad writing and bad direction. Exactly. I feel like you could have Zachary Levi be playing a more mature 18 year old now and you could make it work. Yeah. You could do something. Something, a part of me wonders if it's as simple as in the script, they probably have Billy's lines labeled differently from the Shazam Captain Marvel lines, right? So they probably have, you know, Billy is lying, he says Shazam and then his dialogue now comes up as Shazam. So it makes me wonder if there's like a cognitive dissonance going on while they're writing it where it went and Shazam shows up. They subconsciously almost think of him as a different character because he appears different. I don't know. It's something that I'm wondering. Yeah. I also wouldn't be surprised if they let Zachary Levi do some improv or something because that's how a lot of it feels incredibly undercooked as far as the jokes and air quotes go. One of the things I read in the chat that I thought was kind of funny was once this stream is over, no one will ever speak of this film ever. Probably. No one will say the word. It was hard to remember the movie up until today. Yeah. But we have to hurry with this. Memories are all falling apart. Yeah, well, I'll be honest, like going through the recap, I'm unlocking memories of my theatrical experience. Yeah, like I'm remembering how I react. Oh, seriously, when we see certain films, one of the things we worry about, say me, Mal Free, Rags, we'll be like, oh, shit, we've got to be careful of jumping into a call because we might end up talking a bit about it when we need to save for the podcast. We don't want to end up repeating everything. I think when I first spoke to Free about this film, I had like two or three things that are just dead in the water talking about it. I was just like, yeah. That's probably why I came out saying, it's like, oh, yeah, I think it was kind of mid because I'm not like angry and felt like it was like offensive. But then again, it was like midnight and I was waiting for the bus and it was cold and I was like, oh, I want to go home. And then we recorded other things and then the day was over and I never thought about it again. Like two days later when I started thinking about it again, it's like, oh, yeah, this all happens. Like, oh, yeah, that's really bad. I should have been more angry after I watched that movie. Yeah, very similar experience because I, you know, all I was thinking by the end of it is like, come on and fucking post-credits scene. I need to go home. I forgot my ADHD meds. I'm my focus is all over and then I get home. It's like, what movie did I just see? Oh, all right. There was a thing and there was this moment and then there was a theme. And then there was a line here and then Wonder Woman, something. Yeah, that was the movie. Okay. So all of this is just coming back to me now. Oh, it's been an interesting experience this stream. It really has. Oh, Lucy Liu has the apple now and everyone like was mentioned it's only Shazam with powers left. And I think the last we see of him is he says, now where's that dragon? And then we cut over to Lucy Liu planting the apple in a stadium and it raises this big old tree and all of its roots start to spread throughout the city. And on those roots are little like sacks of organic stuff that hatch open. We get harpies, minotaurs, Cyclops and Chimera. It feels like a really big clash of aesthetics. This idea that you have this plant and the plant has these pods that open up and they're gooey. But outside of the pod or from the pod just comes like random assorted Greek mythology creatures. The minotaur, which like had an or, you know there's just a minotaur, there's a Chimera, there's unicorns, there's harpies. It's just like stuff just comes out of the fruit pod of this tree. And it just doesn't seem to make sense at all. You expect like some sort of a plant monster from Jumanji to come out. And yeah. Also the Cyclopses were tiny. I gotta say that was something that was distracting as well as the CGI not being great. I was too busy or going the minotaur side. Yeah, I was too fucking bothered by the fact that the Chimera's like scorpion stinger appears and everyone just goes, ooh. It's like, what do you run? Let me have a look what happens when it finally hatches. Oh, I get yeeted across the street and then to a shop and die. Like, oh, what did you expect? She gets stabbed in the back by the stinger and tosses it to the shop and she's like, oh, yeah. Yeah, you've at least tried to bend look, you know? Yeah, if you have to look. If they're going to do all this kind of horror-like stuff, I feel like the movie felt really cheap in the fact that it was a horror scene, you know? Yeah. Like, you know, people, like these giant horrific monsters show up and they just throw people off screen. You know, there's no blood. It's not like Hellboy. One woman got impaled. Don't even see it really though. Like, they hide a lot of it. Well, you see it, but it's off-screen very quickly. So you see the impale, but then they throw it off just to make sure it's not on screen for too long. Hear them. I thought that was really lame. Yeah. There was one good thing about it and that was one of the minotaurs was sort of rising and then a cop just goes, that's a fucking monster. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, with his pistol. You know, he tried. Yeah. But of course the pistol did no damage at all because pistols never work against anything in movies that have monsters in them. It's one of my least favorite little tropes, you know? It's like a big monster. Just let it get shot a couple of times and then just rampages all over your face or something. Like, that's still fine. Yeah, have a little bit of blood come out of it or something, you know, like he tried and it was worth something. Yeah. It could still kill him. Yeah, and like an injured monster is often a more scary monster. So think about it. What happens when you injure a lion or a tiger but it doesn't die? It gets more pissed off. It gets more desperate to survive. It gets, and it targets you for hurting it and then it targets everything around it. So if anything, letting the monsters be a little bit more vulnerable would actually heighten the menace level. So you're thinking entirely too much about that. With all that in play, we must be in the third act, right? It's like, that's gotta be it. You know, yeah, sure, sure. Sure. Very scary and stuff. And then it turns up to our crew of heroes and she's like, the tree is so beautiful in our realm. Here it's corrupted by the person who planted it. It was not meant for this soil. I, it's such a non-point, but I was just like, wait, is it who plants it the matters or is it the soil that matters? It was both. Yeah. Like, are you breaking your own rules? Would it have been nice if you planted it or is it just Lucy Lou is just evil? She plants things, they're just evil. That's how that works. It's just an evil gardener. She has a black thumb. And then she should sort of fuck up Sunflower while she plants, geez. Yeah, I wouldn't want to say. She did nothing born out of revenge, you know, is good. That's the whole thing. It doesn't make any real sense. Can her supervillain name be the necro thumb? The necro thumb? Yeah. So I was thinking about something. It's the first time I was in sync with the movie. Shazam in the background goes, who's side is she on? And I was like, yeah. No question. I'm on my own side now. That's what she says. I'm on the left side. And she basically says, I'm a sway Helen Mirren. She's the only one that can subdue my sister. I'll convince her. I'll die trying. And then Freddie's like, die. No, no, no, what do you mean die? We can always find another way. We can find another way, an alternative. And she says, sweet Freddie, if needs be, I will die. I have lived a long life. And I was just like, what? Oh, geez. Do you think you should excuse me? That's just like, when did we switch the way we were taught? Like, what is this? You always talk like a normal person. Now suddenly you're like trying to cope a period, accurate or some shit. Like, what is this? Oh, sweet Freddie. Shut up. You've noted for five seconds. You can just feel the spotlight coming down as the soliloquy engages. Then he says, what do you mean you've lived a long life? We're the same age. And then she says, I'm over 6,000 years old. And he goes, what? And then Shazam's like, wow, you look great. So yeah. All right. We're just having this chat. There are very important things happening right now. She kisses Freddie. And then that's after all the information she just gave out. And so the parents are like, hmm, that doesn't seem right. Yeah, like that was that's kind of awkward now that we know that it's like, yeah, it is. And you still kept it in the movie. So I don't know why you did that. Yeah, it's a little premature. You're not going to lie. Well, you know what happened. I feel the reverse. Just saying, yeah, just saying, yeah, yeah. And they call it out. Yeah, that's what I mean. It's even weird that they call it out. I was like, OK, yeah. And then Shazam's like, I don't know what to do. I had to Google who those sisters were. You picked the wrong guy without my family. I'm nothing. I have no idea what I'm doing. And then the wizard says, you have no wisdom in that head of yours, but your heart is wise. Because, you know, after he's been shitting on him, the whole movie, how he fucked up and is awful. And he was wrong. Now all of a sudden it's like, no, no, your heart is wise. Like, when did you turn your camera around to that? What did that happen? Part of the set of powers you get, none of them mentioned anything to do with your heart, which is why all like values that kind of are associated with them. Hence why I would be like, ah, because you need to choose the right person because you give them so many powers. But now he's like explained it that's almost the explanation for where the wisdom of Solomon went. It didn't go to their heads. It went to their hearts. And it's like, wait, but. So then who? Why does it matter who you pick? If everyone gets like wise hearts, presumably because he references it. So at that point, it's like, so you're just not even you anymore. You've just been given a thing that gives you a change of heart and then a bunch of physical abilities. Yeah, because the whole thing is that it's supposed to be the reverse, right? That he's pure of heart that I think in the original material, like it had been through tragedy after tragedy by the the ripe old age of a fucking 10 and it hadn't affected him. And that was what granted him worthiness is that he was pure of heart and he was able to he was also strong and able to endure that and also black out and prove that giving it to adults was bad idea. So the fact that they've changed it, the fact that it's oh, it getting the wisdom of Solomon changes your heart. It does cheapen it. It does cheapen it a lot. But it's nice to me that they're actually trying to answer the question of where did the wisdom of Solomon go? And it's like it when the wisdom went into your heart, you have heart wisdom. Which is like, you know, how to like people really. You like the right people because you like the right people. Hot wise, though, not mine. You don't stick your dick in crazy. I don't know. I guess so. Yeah, the message. So yeah, don't understand any of that at all. And by the way, I just reminded myself for those who don't know in the first Shazam, the wizard mentions his history of how like the wizard's council got destroyed. Now, if you remember, because we watched Black Adam, the wizard council is destroyed in that by Black Adam. And so when he retells it in the first Shazam film, he says that all that happened. But that during his rampage, like they don't name him, but he said during that guy's rampage, he released the seven deadly sins. Yes. When did that happen in Black Adam? When was the death? Why? Why was it there in the basement? That that place that he like annihilated. Did the sins live there? What was in the basement? It's such a like, what's going on? Where does it have to no one will be able to tell you like the plot or the history of like everyone can tell you the backstory for the Lord of the Rings, right? It's very clearly presented. It's never they never take it back. They never go against it. Everyone can remember that. And that was 20 years ago. But you talk about like these Wonder Woman movies, the Shazam movies, you're like, so can you give me like the backstory of these movies? Sort of what's happening with the world? And you're like, no, you can't. It's all nonsense and madness. Oh, I can tell you from other mediums. Can't tell you about this universe. Is a line that's sad and I don't know how long it's going to take for us to pass this one out in terms of just what the fuck is going on. So state of the people we have. Shazam out up ready to go. We have all the kids and the parents and they have a truck. Right, that's that's our resources in total. All mention of powers to Shazam says, I'm going to get the staff. You guys lure the monsters away from the stadium while I do it. Yeah, but now, though, you children and humans. Yes. Yeah. And I know what I said. You children and humans, you need to go and you need to go in and distract all of these mythological creatures so that I can go do something else with my powers. I had to double triple, triple, triple take away. I couldn't fucking believe he said that. I didn't I didn't register it at all the first time around. And I really this sounds like, did he actually just command this rag tag group of very vulnerable people to go and try and stop an army of Cyclops, Minotaur, Chimera and fucking the flying ones? I always forget. Well, none of them have combat experience and two of them seem to be quite obese, so I don't know her expecting him to do here. Absolutely. Well, he doesn't want them from a character thing. He's like, you should get away from here. You don't have power. Absolutely. The cops with their guns can't stop them. I just don't get it. Anything is the kids who should be insisting on helping despite his reservations. It shouldn't be him going, yeah, yeah, child soldiers, you don't have any weapons anymore. No, I don't even have them with your bare hand. They don't have special information either. Yeah. What does he mean? They're just like, what do you mean? Like with our faces? I guess with our little innocent creature bodies. We'll just go, look, you can kill us. Come over here. Because Shazam could tell them that they need to leave and get help or go find something or they they need to leave, right? And then he takes off and then they decide to not leave. He could say run, don't get involved. Well, so the thing is, I think it's unfortunate. None of them have super speed because if they, for example, Shazam had super speed, he might be able to actually make it all the way around the whole city, uppercutting and breaking the faces of all of these enemies and then go deal with staff. Probably something he could do in super speed. He does not have super speed, though, right? No, no, that would be silly. No, or like lightning powers. He could chain together. Yeah, I just think that's more risky. The super speed thing just breaks everything constantly. Yeah. Hey, yeah. Then the mum is like, wait, I want to see my son before he leaves and then he un-shazams. He says, don't worry. I won't force you to keep me after I defeat this dragon. And then she's like, you'll never age out of your home. Now go kick their ass. Kind of like, well, that was normal, yes? Yeah, she was going to stay ass. I've never seen an ass more telegraphed than that. Yeah, you can see it coming by the way. That is the second half to the completed arc where she worried that he didn't like the home and her as a mum. And then later he says he's just annoyed. He's sort of insecure about the fact that she might boot him out. And you're thinking to yourself, like, that's something. It's like, yep, two scenes, about five lines. It's thin, but it's clear. That's an arc, technically. There is something there. We might just be able to fish it out, flesh it out, and do something with it in a different movie. But oh, well, he says, love you, mum. And she says, me too. Probably should say, I love you too, not me too. Yeah, that's a little bit of a joke. Why are you me chewing me, mum? No, hashtag me. Oh, God! Someone just said, let me look upon you with my own eyes. Not quite, but yeah. Let me look upon you in your own flesh. Oh, and something to note. When he turns back into Billy, for that moment, he is far more mature again than anything you ever get from Shazam. Actually, he's enjoying it. It's really weird. So they must have been on set the same day. They must have shot that back to back, so it's even more bizarre. Yeah, because the kid's like, OK, I'm ready for my scene, and Zach's in the back of it, whoo-hoo! What is this, unicycle? What? I hope I don't just drag you there, buddy. Must have been difficult to CGI all the clown makeup off him. Yeah, yeah. So the sisters are met up again, and Athena is like, don't you see what you're doing? And then Lucy Liu says, what I see is just. She's really great, and awesome, and such an interesting person. And Athena says, the tree is blighted. You made a vow to destroy the realm, not destroy another. And then Lucy Liu says, I am showing them their place. By killing them all, and they have no fucking clue who's doing it or how this happened or what's going on. If you're trying to show a message here, they're just going to be too busy running for their lives to know what the message is. This is just a terrible random calamity that's happened to them. It'd be so funny if she's running through the street saying, I did this, by the way. Gods, gods, I did this. This was me. Gods did this, and they're like, what? Who are you? What was that? Like, don't you remember thousands of you? You didn't forget, did you? You, you, bud. That's awkward. Trust me, you did something really that I didn't like a long time ago. Trust me, you deserve this. So they're having that fight. You were my sister, Calypso. I loved you. They're having their half back and forth, and then Helivir just cuts in and says, you know what? Your fanatical tone echoes our Uncle Hades. No, I'm putting an end to this. And I was thinking, is Hades Atlas's brother? Hey, these nuts. They'd have to move things around, right? Because Atlas, he's a Titan, wasn't he? Well, and Chronos is Zeus and Hades and Poseidon's dad, right? Yes, and he was a Titan as well. So Hades would have to be the brother. Well, Hades is the brother of Poseidon's Zeus. What are you, a cousin? So if they are the daughters of Atlas. Wait, Atlas at the Titan, yeah. Atlas was the Titan, right? Yeah, Atlas was the Titan. The dad is Atlas. Is Chronos a brother to Atlas? Is that at least a connection or no? Oh, the Atlas has three children. Pius, Dionys and Calypso. Oh, so they're just making shit up then, which is OK. So I'm pretty sure that these characters are OCs. They're not like from the comics. Well, he just said Calypso. That's the Lucy Luz who's playing Calypso. Yeah, I guess. And because it's Greek, it also says that his children are the Hesperides, the Hades and the Pleiades. Are the Pleiades? The Pleiades. Pleiades nuts. So they get these. What the fuck was that? OK, I thought I heard something. I don't know what that was. So yeah, the the Hesperides are the nymphs of evening and golden light of sunset. That's lovely. The Hyades, they are the sister of nymphs that bring rain. Lovely. That's wonderful. And the Pleiades were the seven sister nymphs, companions of Artemis, the goddess of the hunt. They were called things and did stuff. All right. Well, I was just I was just curious if because, yeah, whatever, it doesn't matter. They can make it whatever fuck they want because they don't care. They've already like fell over Wonder Woman's lore. So the Egyptian equivalent of Atlas is Shoe. OK, yeah, Shoe, good old shoe makes that criticism. Helen Mirren, and then she gets stabbed through the heart by the dragon tail. Oh, goodness gracious. Legitimately, when I saw that, I was like, oh, now we're going to have to fucking listen to Lucy Lou for the rest of the movie. As we literally like the moment we started to have like something interesting kind of happen, the movies like, no, remember, you know your place. No, your place, old lady, you're boring. We need the cool. You're boring. You gotta stay that way. Oh, yeah. Then then we get in a fucking absolute. The lines get worse as the film goes on and this is an absolute banger from Lucy Lou. She's looking at Athena and she says, if your emotions rest with the humans, so then perhaps you should be human. Oh, my goodness. And she fires the bake you human laser at her. No, no, we've established that this laser will impact on solid objects and it will disperse. So all she needs to do is move solid objects in the way, right? Oh, you're in luck. She does indeed. And she does it for a while. She goes with the access powers. And oh, my God, she, it looks like absolute miles and miles and miles. She moves herself away from Lucy Lou. So yes, she's totally fine. Absolutely, definitely fine. She moved herself away. One problem. She may have accidentally, when moving herself away, not moved herself away in any way other than, how do you even put this, one direction? Backwards. Yeah, she just, she dodged backwards. It's like, you know, on a video game, how an enemy has like a laser beam and it like goes in a straight line and your character can dodge, but you dodge backwards, which doesn't accomplish anything because the laser beam goes straight forward and always go back to the school of Prometheus. The famous film for characters running in a straight line when a donut is chasing them. And it's like, just go left or right. That's all you gotta do is just go left or right. So Axis lady, she doesn't go left. Doesn't go right. She doesn't go up. She doesn't go down. She goes back and back alone. Unfortunately for her, the laser electricity stuff, it caught up eventually and hits her. So she loses her golf. I don't know. And I, I, I, I, I, That's incredible. Like you had to try to do that. Yeah, that's actually difficult to do, I assume anyway, from how she controls the powers to nail it to be exactly in the same way. But as was said by a meme, we've seen this thing crash into physical objects several times and stop. But I guess you just fucked that up. And it, it, it somehow get, I mean, it smashes through several glass doors before it hits her, but maybe glasses. Yeah. So she moved herself miles and miles and miles away to avoid the shot, but it just kept coming and still hit her cause she's an idiot. And it wouldn't stop coming. The reason this happened is because they, they knew that allowing Axis girl to keep her power would mean there's just no stakes cause she'd annihilate everything. Gotta get rid of them. But of course, I think of like Elsa or something. Sorry. You know, she can join Rick on Stark in the school of running away from things that are avoidable. All the people in that school. It's still. So yeah, you, you were wondering earlier, how will the family be able to make a significant difference in this fight? And we find out the dad runs over a minotaur and it's already nearly like destroyed the van as you'd expect. There's a big crack in the thing. And he says, I don't know how many more I can run over these things. It's like, yeah. Probably not. But seriously though with all the resources they had between them, that is about the maximum they could do. And that's what we saw. So. It's a bullet proof. They're not band proof. Ask David. Yeah, okay. I will, I will. I will go to his house right now. Oh no. And do that. So, we have Dala come up with a plan. You see, Steve is with them in the car. I don't remember when he joined them on this trip but he's there. And they say, hey Steve, what are monsters afraid of? Which to me feels like a very vague question. He's probably more specific. Like how can I destroy these without any super powers? What do we do? What should we do, Steve? What should we do? How do we, you know, instead of this, like be very direct with his omniscient ban. And then what is their monster knight? And you just, yeah, specific question. But anyway, he answers the question of what a monster's afraid of with unicorns. And it's like, cause he says that's the king of the beast. Well, what happens if a king of the beasts? Lion's probably the first thing that comes up. It's generally looks, I'm getting a lot of pictures of lions here. Well, I guess it's this version, right? Cause you think it would want this quaint little critters. A lot of lions. Here's a lion with a lot of heads. So that's like a mega, that's like a mega lion. That might be a biblically accurate angel. A biblically accurate lion. Yeah. We have, yeah. Lots and lots and lots of lions it looks like. So you'd expect it would be a lion or what? What if I do mythology king of the beasts? We get the griffons. Yeah, cause they're back halves of lion. That's cool. And we have just all sorts of stuff here. But yeah, no unicorns. I don't see anywhere. Well, you know, it's their own continuity. Yeah. Fringes mentioned very. Says the, yeah, it looks like according to the libraries from the University of Missouri, the griffon is the king of the beasts. You know, yeah, someone did mention they say, you know, what are monsters afraid of? And they say king of the beasts. Like, well, what are the king of the monsters? That would be Godzilla, not available. Yeah. Wonder Woman doing his own thing. Company of Godzilla didn't show up. It's kind of bullshit. Yeah. So fun fact, Godzilla is canon to the Marvel Comics universe. That that is 100% true. But they had to rename him after they lost the rights. So that was funny. Well, the unicorns being mentioned, Darla says, I love unicorns. And the wizard says, yet the unicorn does not love you. What are we thinking about that? I mean, yeah, probably not. Like, it's the way to say that it's, yeah, that you shouldn't like maybe it's about what are they called? Those are like, like if you have a YouTuber or a streamer, those quasi personal, what's it what are they called? Parasocial. Parasocial relationship. Yeah. You have a parasocial relationship with the unicorns. You think that they're cool. You've read about them and you know about them, but they've never met you, you know. So you might think that you have a sort of rapport that you don't actually have with a unicorn. So you should be careful. And maybe maybe you don't have to meet your heroes. Maybe it's not as cool as, you know, you might think it is. You know, don't go to their house. Jesus Christ, don't do that. You know, don't go bug them. You might have a gun. You're going to e-mails. Maybe that's what they mean. Maybe. Really, perhaps. Really strange thing to say, but I don't just like, okay, whatever, I guess. Why not? Especially the wizard. Is it for like the audience to be like the audience is like, no, audience. You might think unicorns are nice and wonderful, but actually they're jerks and they look spooky. Kind of matches the rest of them. And they smell. Dialogue is ill-conceived, say the least. Yeah, but based on what they end up doing with the unicorns, it seems like they are just friends with the unicorns. Oh, no, we'll get, we're so close to that. Well, it wasn't friendly at first. They had the secret, you see, the secret to the corn. So he says the unicorn is the most fearsome creature of the realm they loathe humanity. And then she says, is there anything they do like? And the pen writes down dark caverns and ambrosia. So Dala says, I have an idea. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. And they all follow suit with her. They don't ask her what the plan is. They just don't ask what it is. Don't do anything. They don't. As Mary leaves, she says, hey, guys, meaning the mum and the dad, get as many people to safety as you can. OK, OK, I can fit like six people in here. Gotcha. Yeah, sure. Fine, whatever. That almost feels like a line that they saw in movies before. And how to say, but they don't know why. So we got to do the thing. Yeah, we got to do that thing. Movies get you go get someone a safety. Yeah. Yeah. OK, good. Good. We did it. Like there's only an army of Greek mythology out there. Just go nuts. Get a bad. Yeah. And then why is everybody following the eight year old to the bloodthirsty monster that hates humanity? That's what was just described as. And then why are the parents letting all this happen? Reasons because they they they lampshade that too. This is a lot of that in this film. She goes, I don't know how to parent right now. All of this. Like, yeah, you don't. You could try. You could be like, hey, guys, don't. Coolies or something like that. I will turn this car around right here, Mr. And we'll go to a safe place. Oh, wait, let's do that. Yeah, that sounds reasonable. Let's do that. Yeah, yeah, let's do that. Let's go the other way. Let's go the opposite direction of the demons. And then we have a conversation or something. Freddie walks out of the car and he doesn't follow dollar. He instead just walks off in a different direction and spots and then he's just walking around. He goes, oh, and then it's unreal. Like you just don't care that nobody cares about anything. It's funny because I missed a little bit of the movie because I went to the bathroom. I was like, oh, she's just walking around here. I guess I missed how she got here. But now I was listening to you guys like, oh, no, they just get here and now she's there. I was like, okay. Simple as that. And then we catch up with Shazam. What's he up to? He grabs the dragon and pushes it through a skyscraper. And when he's done with that, he says, woo, that was satisfying. Oh, that's fine. I can tonight from Superman. Yeah, I got some super bad vibes there. I guess the system he's inspired by one of the most aggressive bad war criminals of the world. Oh, well. And then the dragon like does the whole bra with fire and somehow he gets hit by that. He doesn't manage to avoid it. Yeah. How you manage that, buddy. And then we get one of my favorite Lucy Lou lines in the whole film. This one, this is where it gets to the point. We're so bad. I'm starting to really enjoy it. Oh, this is we laughed. But she says you thought you were invulnerable, but no magical fire magic could kill magic. Like, oh, wow, they wrote that. They wrote that. They sure did. I love that you thought you were invulnerable, but no magic. A fire. It's magical fire. Wow, magic fire. It is far more deadly than fire fire. And yeah, she's lost any semblance of being in any way normal. She says, I defeated my traitor sister, a God. You think I won't destroy you? Thank you. Real, real, real. Then I will destroy your lives. Oh, so crazy. You he man. Yeah, that. You're an evil. I have a soul of darkness. Oh, I planted an apple in a baseball field and it's evil. Oh, harvest of darkness. So you then fire some lightning at it and it hits the staff and then it bounces into the dome and it bounces around the dome a whole bunch. He looks up and he goes, the staff, the staff is absorbing it all like a battery. Oh my goodness. And that's all you know about the wall. Nice reach, dude. Yeah, exactly. They've called it a battery earlier at the film, but seeing what he saw there, I don't know how at all that translates to what he says. Yeah, I got nothing. So he concludes a plan from that. We don't know what it is. Yeah, he flies off. Great. Great plan. We then cut back to the kids and you hear the wizards say this is a terrible idea. You don't understand the savagery, the barbarity. And I thought from that is the idea. She's told them the plan now, but we didn't see it. It was off-screen. Maybe. I don't know. I assume, though. It is. It is. Because otherwise he wouldn't have anything to. It is slightly better if that's the way we should interpret it. It's still terrible, but like it's slightly. Mm hmm. Anyway, yeah, they find a unicorn spawn point and they see it in the distance and she's like, All right, time for a plan. The unicorn starts like sprinting out of here and they all like panic and turn away like, Oh God, we're all dead. But this thing for anyone listening because you're not going to believe me on this one. I'm going to have to try. Yeah, explain this to you because this is what happens. It's this thing has been built up as the most horrifying creature that despises humanity in all of history and will just annihilate everything in its path. Right. And the kid says she's come up with a plan because we were told they like ambrosia and you're thinking like, what is it going to be? What does Dala have? What is she going to do? What is going to happen? And so it's about to reach her and she reaches into her pocket and throws skittles at it. I need you to absorb that. It just will go a little slower and then as it slows down stops and looks at the skittles, the camera tightens right up on her and she says, paste the rainbow. An adult wrote this script so you know feeding it by hand the skittles and she says skittles are the closest thing we have to ambrosia. Yeah. Alcohol would like to disagree. I don't even like I I that has to be product placement. This has got to be product placement. Oh, there's a rainbow. It's like it's product like God. This is some of this might be the worst product place I've ever seen. Like it's I'm trying to think of ones that are very intrusive. It's incredibly intrusive. It just buzzer way into the film. I'm not aware of a worse example. When we often in film see someone holding like a phone that's a Sony Xperia and then they open their laptop and it's also a Sony thing. It's like Sony was great. We will often joke and like claim that the movie is like by SOTY because SOTY products are. Yeah, this is literally the taste the rainbow because skittles the best tasting thing on Earth. They basically said it would be like it'd be like if you had a scene in Spider-Man where he's playing PlayStation 4 and he's playing God of War and then he looks at the camera and says PlayStation 4 greatness awaits or some shit. He just did that or if he ever if he used to PlayStation he used it to bash like the villains head in but the PlayStation is totally intact because it's that sturdy and awesome and you can still play video games on it. This station sure is unstoppable. That's right. PlayStation sure has however many terror flops or whatever whatever you're fighting about with all of the incredible powers of the PlayStation library. We too can defeat the enemy wizards. PlayStation 4 399 and he turns the PlayStation into a Spidey armor and on his wrist there's a phone that he's turned into his little gadgety thing. It does. He has Sony branded fucking web shooters. You know that sort of thing. Now they would just say wow PlayStation 5. How could I get my hands on a PlayStation 5. I'm glad you asked. Did you know that the PlayStation 5 is available at these participating stores? To prove it back to Shazam like Skittles save the world. Yes. In part. They use the Skittles to kill all of the critters. They've the world saved a whole bunch of innocent lives are described as the most tasty thing ever and like the king of the beasts. The most horrifying thing can be pacified by the power of Skittles and she says taste the rainbow. What the fuck if you describe this to someone like I don't believe that they believe it like you'd be in hyperbolic. Yeah. This is a sketch. This is a Wayne's World 3. Right. That's what we're doing and plus these are Skittles which let's be very very clear and honest here are mid at best when it comes to candy. If I was if I was just standing there and someone came up to me that I trusted and loved a family member perhaps and offered to me a box of Skittles and said here you go rags because that's your name. You can have this box of Skittles. I would say no thank you. And let's and let's be clear here. Let's be 100% crystal clear about how the film also talks about Ambrosia. They literally make a point of saying it is the nectar of the guards and then later on we have Skittles being the equivalent or the closest thing you can get on earth to the nectar of the guards. Let's just absorb that. In the chat. Oh yeah. Well what someone has to chat. What is a good candy and what we can do really quick left to right just say your favorite candy cap go. It's I like starburst starburst. All right. You put a lot of pressure M&M's I like. Yeah. I really like Reese's Pieces. Okay. Those are good. Mm hmm. Oh wait those are the peanut butter cups right. Yeah me too. I'm also a peanut butter cup man. No. Right. The break. I would actually have to say. Yeah. Metal you have to say one. But I just said one. Well he's allowed to pick the same one right. So put it like this. Make a rule you have to have a unique one. Calm down Raj. You have to have a unique one. Yes they do. No. I can't think of a candy that you like. I just want that one. That's his favorite. I like that metal is in trouble when I'm the one who said it second. No you said it third. I said it first. That's the point. Oh yeah that's true. Metal was next in in life. I don't only likes one candy. Yeah. He's only only one is yours. Right. What is we don't metal just say snickers. Well bar or bounty or Twix. You did so many. I like pods. There we go. I like tied pods. Those are my ceramic pods. Well I was going to say cat bars. They can be pretty good. Of all the ones that I mentioned I read them all above skittles. Sorry not sorry. Oh yeah. All of these are like they're just yeah they're not they're not very exciting. Are they there but that's about it. What are those like fruit by the foot but they have like the sour stuff on them the sour sprinkles on them. That's it's gold. Yeah. Oh man. That's that's ambrosia to children and probably to me currently. Oh man sour Jolly Ranchers. Tim Tams. Oh I don't know what those are. Tim Tams are there are there are a local Australian delicacy those ones. Tim Tams Australia's favorite chocolate biscuit. Yeah. When people come on holiday to Australia Tim Tams are often sort of up there with like a veggie might try. Yeah they're neat. Then it's just like this. So they're kind of are they kind of like Oreos where they have like two wafers and some like creamy stuff in the middle. And then it's chocolate coated. There is depending on which one you get there'll be like different sort of flavors in that middle portion but then it'll be you know like all things coated double coat chewy caramel white dark chocolate mint. Yeah Tim Tams are they're pretty sweet. These look very good. Yeah these do look great. I'm seeing I'm seeing a lot of pushback for the idea that M&M's could be considered better than Skittles. What's the weird on that? Oh of course they are. Yeah so of course they are. Not even close. No contest. I definitely prefer M&M's but I guess tragic lack of taste. It depends on what kind of flavor you're going for I suppose. One thing I would say is that something I've noticed is flavor when I when I was sort of that initial burst of flavor but then it kind of deteriorates pretty quickly and then you're sort of left with like you know whereas M&M's are just like they're great the whole way. It's always a safe bet. You know from beginning to end. Yeah it's always a safe bet. The Skittles are just like oh that's like one of the pranks right one of the famous mean pranks is like putting random Skittles into the M&M's. I mean also there's a great deal of variety in the types of M&M's you can get as well. Yes. You know peanut M&M's are really good because peanut butter M&M's are classic. Yeah. Yeah. Wait butter M&M's? What peanut butter. I thought you said butter M&M's and I'm like well I don't know. I guess so. I think that's a good thing over in America. Nectar of the Gods right. Something I was going to say though that's worth noting on the Shazam thing is look all right it's Chekhov's Skittles. They set up at the beginning of the film when what's the name Darla was like oh yes Skittles you know but I'm going to give the yellow ones or whatever it's a Helen Mirren. Because you don't deserve strawberry. Even earlier it's even earlier one. There's an even earlier one. That's right. So it's really it's I think it's all the way in the beginning right after the museum scene was just kind of doing their house stuff like housework chores or whatever. It's like oh there who put Skittles in your pocket and then the girls like that was me. It was supposed to be a surprise. Yeah. So right there. So good. So clever. So you can't complain it was set up and yeah it was true. Anything set up is it's in the clear as long as you set it up it's good you're good you're golden. That's the only rule of writing but if you want the true nectar of the gods you must you know it's not going to be Skittles because Skittles cannot do an equivalent of the Tim Tam slam where you bite off one end of the Tim Tam and the other end of the Tim Tam and you put it in a hot drink like a hot cup of cocoa or something and you drink the cocoa through the Tim Tam making it more chocolatey as it goes up. It is an Australian tradition and then it melts through the Tim Tam. Yeah through the Tim Tam. They were like squares. They are squares but you bite the top off and the bottom off and because there is a meltable creamy filling in between the hot drink melts it as you suck up. Okay. Yeah and it melts it and makes it even more delicious. You guys sort of understand what you mean. Yeah it's hard for me to visualize in terms of this video on YouTube. M&Ms are the front runner by a considerable margin 61%. It should be bigger. It should be bigger. There should be like 80% percent of Skittles. Because I don't mind Skittles like I can have them but if you say to M&Ms or Skittles I'm going with M&Ms like basically 100% of the time. I was gonna say I can't imagine I would even if I had M&Ms once per day I don't know how well I wouldn't want that. I'm trying to think of like when would I finally be like fine Skittles. Here's an interesting question. There were no other options. We don't even know maybe not. Even then maybe not. You know the mystery box thing. Skittles guaranteed or whatever's in the box and it could be any type of like handy both good and terrible. What do you do? I'm going with the box. You go for the box? Yeah. I'm going for the mystery box dopamine rush. Yeah you do get some fun with the mystery box. Well Rags what about you? Are you gonna bet it all on what's in the box? Bet it all. Or what's the box? So the idea is Skittles for sure or whatever's in the box. I'm going to go with whatever's in the box. Right. I wonder what chat would maybe that's another poll. Skittles versus mystery box. So the idea with the question is to take a gamble on whether or not it'll be better or worse than Skittles. I think it's kind of a gauge of like whether you consider Skittles to be mid or like worse than that because it's almost baked into good. It's almost baked into the good or bad. But there's like a 50% chance that you'll get. If we assume that Skittles is absolutely mid. I think it just says to more so the preference because if you told me M&M's or what's in the box it's like I'll probably go with M&M's. Like that's you know like that's a nice safe one or like Kit Kat versus you know the mystery box. That picture of the guy drinking it through a Tim Tam looks very awkward. Yeah. They need to be longer for that purpose I think. Yeah. Or you need to specialize. Skittles won that one by the way. Oh not Skittles M&M's by a considerable margin. So it's safe to say that if Shazam was a better written film it would have been M&M's at one. Yes. And then you would have the M&M guy show up or something and go yeah good choice buddy. Mr. Peanut could show up and just start smacking people with his cane and I'd be like yeah follow us. Peanuts are really good. His favorite like mascot for a like a sweet like candy. Oh, I'm not pieces pieces. I don't think I've had a favorite one. I just wanted the candy. I'd have to think of any like as long as we agree. As long as we agree that Lemonhead is the worst. You guys know not everyone likes chocolate right. Yeah. That's okay. Yeah I guess there are some people out there that don't like chocolate. That's totally fine. What you sure. Yeah. You know they're allergic to joy we get it. The M&M's are fine. I don't really know that many like candy specific mascots. There's the Kool-Aid man I guess. The Toucan for Froot Loops. Toucan Sam but that's not candy is it? The cereal I guess could be stretched. Some cereal is candy. Don't eat cereal but there's yeah some of them but if we're going with like typically candy then because I think like berries are candy essentially but I wouldn't. Nature's candy yeah. Nature's candy. Nature's ambrosia. Literally grown good. Nature's ambrosia absolutely. I thought many many nights have been spent with me kneeling naked in front of the open refrigerator just shoveling strawberries into my mouth. It's just you know it's what you do. Unironically I feel like I'll go with candy right now. Dude I'm just happy to be here and beat no Skittles. Oh no sorry Skittles stands. Oh no Skittles fans on suicide watches. I guess I'll go with the M&M's because they have different personalities. Yeah that's right you got the red guy and then the yellow guy. Yeah but they took the sexy dress away so I don't want them anymore. Yeah well she can yeah well we don't have to talk about her. She had her kids. This just reminds me of a video I saw on Twitter of some guy in the middle of the street you know walking up to the camera and ranting about feminist M&M's it was the funniest thing I'd ever seen in my life. What the fuck? I don't agree with that guy. Why do they just call it an opportunity to call it feminism? Oh you're right. It's right there man. I watched the Rings of Power videos that random film talk did they're really good and he calls one of the the white robed witch ladies people he calls the leader of them feminine. Oh I get yeah okay that took a second yeah very good. I'm superfluous I'm not going to ask Linkara about the green M&M I value my sanity. So anyway this movie let's go back to it yeah so you have that whole skills thing. We have to. And then an army of unicorns appear and Mary says we're going to need a lot more Skittles. Let's just like stop it please stop it. Yeah you need more Skittles because they're going to save the world Skittles the greatest candy that there ever was. The company is made Skittles. No that doesn't work Rex because they're just evil the unicorns can be saved. Oh okay. Yeah like maybe it'd be worth giving them to the Cyclops and then he's like there the M&M's they're too good. I'm too evil they are too good. We do not blend. So yeah they're riding all the unicorns in and we see this moment where they're just slamming through all of the creatures like stabbing them and with the horns and they're just winning. And they're terrified. And you have Dala say taste the rainbow mother fuck and it cuts her off. That meme. Yeah. You get double taste the rainbow and a mother fucker to boot. Damn. It's not cringe. No. Not at all. I was silent because I was laughing so hard. You said that product placement line wasn't enough. I would then not like embarrassed about that product placement. They got paid. Have you seen the rest of the script? Yeah. I don't think they are. I think that's fine. That was a good money for it. So way back when, way back when I mentioned that uh he was dead Helen Mirren it turns out she's not. Yeah. Giant hole in her chest. And she's like no no no lady you can't die and he hits her with a lightning bolt thing and she's like oh just let me go to the underworld in peace. She gets shot in the chest cavity with the lightning it's really funny. But I'm just baffled by the fact that she just doesn't seem to give a shit. She can clearly do more things and cast spells but she's like nah I've been stabbed. I've given up yeah. Guess I'll die. You seem pretty passionate about this whole thing this whole time but no mind. By the way it's somewhere doing the movie I thought the dome just disappeared because you can't really see it in the background at all. Okay. That's mean imagination. Are you using your imagination? What would have happened if the dome closed on someone you know like someone was standing where the dome formed would they have just been chopped in half? Yes. Probably. Shazam says I think I know how to destroy the tree the dragon and you know loose glue and everything all at once and he says if I have overload the staff with enough lightning she says a bomb you would annihilate everything in the dome and he goes then I have one more favor to ask and I just I just says how did we jump so far so quick okay fine we can make a bomb now but that's what we're doing. Makes sense. A little bombster. So then Freddie and Anne just wondering about they happen to bump right into the fucking dragon and loose glue says then kill the traitor and so it does its weird fear blast instead of just setting him on fire yeah that probably would have done it but you know the whole time I was watching all I was like thinking was why are you not it's a dragon dragons breathe fire that's like the thing that they're known for doing why is this dragon just screaming at them because fear and then and then and then Anne says what is a goddess without her power and then and then Freddie says the most powerful thing about you is you that's what she said to him that's the wisdom of Solomon heart they filmed that scene everybody behind the camera was nodding and smiling like yes they were weeping they were getting their tissues are they like this they were oh they were weeping I was weeping there was this one cameraman goes like cringe listen closely you can hear him in there and we get one of the again I want to make a compilation of her deliveries in this film they're like they're having their moment and then it pans over to good old Lucy Lou and she says kill them why do you have to keep talking you don't need to you can just have a dragon do stuff anyway it's about to bite them because it really doesn't want to use his fire and Shazam pulls on its tail right before it does he got there just in time if he was two seconds later that would have been the end of Freddie and what's the name and yeah what a dragon bites tail and then let it go again he says Freddie Andrea don't and it makes Lucy Lou look at them and then he super speed grabs his staff and he's like haha I got it like you didn't even need to destroy you have super speed she can't do anything against you pretending like you can't trick someone with super speed unless they're not looking like what do you mean now that he has the staff Freddie Shazam now you got powers well I'm gonna find everybody else say Shazam well why would you do that now when they're dealing with like all the mythological creatures that's not gonna be useful for them yeah man it would be useful wow yeah that's right you know what more I think you're right that would be really useful it's shame that he didn't think of that well see he's just like me a little you know weak human being who just doesn't think about these things on the spot yeah I didn't and I love that I can relate to how he didn't yeah yeah it's a human movie and that's what I'm talking about superheroes aren't aspirational figures human movies like us they're just fucking areas human movies I like the human movies but you know what more like you know what he's literally on his tail now on the dragon's tail we've moved on a little bit from there but he was on his tail literally yeah yeah it occurred um what happens in some shit he baits her into following him to the tree and then Helen Mirren shrinks the dome down to basically just the stadium and so it traps Lucy Lew in there and him and then I was like wait if the dome cannot be trans like gone in and out of by the gods even and how did you meet them in that place in Philadelphia for the food remember how'd they get there both sides you can't get through it so she turned it off yeah just really quickly could she make a small hole in the dome and then close it back up again maybe that's like the only fucking thing that could possibly fix this bad shit movie he says remove the dome no sorry Lucy Lew says remove the dome and then Helen Mirren is like as long as I breathe the dome stands till I see you on the other side sister I think they're in a different movie I mean it's all bad but god the overacting like they just gotta just hold to go nuts with it I guess do you think maybe they're trying to evoke like um cape land shit in Ragnarok maybe everyone was like oh she was campy and fun I'm gonna be campy and fun I don't know how to explain but I was afraid of her but yeah she was way better in Ragnarok than they are yeah I was like oh much better I was really scared of her and I don't want her to piss on me she's incredible yeah takes a special kind of actress to pull off the maniacal like Palpatine sort of um performance so um and not be great yeah she's like Yizma from the impersonate groove yeah we then have this shot in the background well in the foreground is Shazam looking around in the background you see Lucy Lu just shooting fire at Helen Mirren and not doing anything because of the dome that's just happening and Shazam just slowly lands and walks over to talk to his family while it's going on I just think it's so funny like Lucy Lu's just there for the next 10 minutes like blah blah blah and uh why isn't it working we can have our conversation so Freddie runs up to the wall and so you know they're on either side of the dome like get out of there and he's like I can't and he's like Billy what are you doing you're not supposed to be in there and he's crying and it's like wait only Shazam knows what's about to happen nobody else does yeah he hasn't even told him about the bomb or anything so I don't know why the funny thing about this is if there's a little makeshift door which there's plenty of doors in a stadium to the cloak room or whatever you can just go back to the rock utility Lucy Lu's just trapped it there yeah I guess until Helen Mirren dies basically the problem here is that Freddie should be like oh sweet get out of there when you can but instead he's treating it as though Shazam's about to die and that's not information he has yet that's awkward but hey whatever maybe the characters are watching the film too and he says I am supposed to be in here I used to think I couldn't do anything right and then I didn't save my powers but it's something that I can do I can save all of you and then Freddie says it's all or none all or none and he says yeah all my family gets to live and none of you gets hurt that sounds like more clever than I believe you could be so bad what do you mean did you say the same thing twice if you all live and none of you get hurt it's like yeah it's kind of baked into each respect of the statement you know Mahler you've said this a couple times already but that's the sort of line where if they said it in the writers room you'd laugh and then go okay now see what we're going to come up with did you think that was a good line I said that was more clever than I think he could have come up with you think that's even more clever than what he could have said like at all like smart or really I don't think he's not quick okay so when he says that it seems out of place I don't think it's good but that seems out of place for him you know to be able to say that so I think that they think it's a heavy and like heartfelt thing while I'm sitting there thinking like did he actually have it in his head the all or none and he was like all of you live and none get hit there you go like that's why Cross is suitably clownable to me but like it's not supposed to be better well I mean it's not this supposed to be a moment where they recognizing this is the final thing he says to his brother this what I mean about the tone like flow because he then says like Freddie I've never had a family you know that everybody I cared about left me my mom my dad everyone when I found you guys hang on and I held on too tight I should let you guys do your own thing now it's time for you to fly we didn't do any of that really we had like one seed you had like five minutes across two movies of them being together so like I don't know most of the time that they are communicating it's them like sneaking up and down the stairs or something there's no like really there's no character building being done it's them trying to leave the house sneaking into the house creeping up the stairs it's not it's not character stuff no so then he's done he's moving on he's going back to Lucy Lou and on cue perfectly he sees her and she says we end this now then he goes yeah we do you know sometimes you know when you write the words down it's not like you're writing it on parchment like you can you can hit backface you don't have to commit to that yeah you can change your mind right it's not it's not set in stone I wish I was there when they filled it you'd be like David come on yes we do that's all you got then he can be like well what do you think you should say well like first of all why the hell are you having her say we end this now like fuck this movie is amusing in a the wrong way the thing is it's just non-stop terrible there's not really a scene where we go oh that was like a good scene batwoman had one good scene yeah you don't even reach batwoman levels of quality well I mean legitimately like I don't know like I'm not sure where we end up with this one wasn't it high top who put something out and someone said you know it's okay to redraft so that he was like how fucking dare you imply that I took redraft I can't believe you would ever say that to another creator oh that's it yeah like if the writer sang it to a fellow writer or something oh god oh my god my gobbly goodness so we think this can be quick he just shoots out a bunch of lightning it bounces around the whole dome it goes into the staff and then he flies directly at the dragon and she says shazam which I think is a very unwise thing to do since that'll turn you into a human that's what I thought as well I guess he wants that extra lightning strike to come down I don't know in any case it kills everything goodbye dragon loosey-loo tree and I like that we managed to get this far by the way without talking about the thing that's about to happen that is the big thing this is the big topic yeah this needs to be where it is easily the thing that pissed me off the most well this is the thing that people in chat won't even be ready for and I talked about it with the as in chat on the thing it's like a spoiler talk thing but yes I'm not lying he kills everything even him he's dead he kills himself to save the world obviously the horde of what a hero mythological monsters they all just disappear as well they like go ash mode yeah they turn to leaves there's a lot of that in these movies where the thing just tends to ash you know what I'm gonna give it a little bit more credit just a little teeny tiny bit they turn into leaves and they came from a tree so that's something that is a thing that is I guess they came from a tree but they also came from like sacks of biologically like renders no mercy I'm tired of like the don't miss they all just get yeeted why would we have to deal with like the consequences of this massive epic battle when we can just delete they have to wrink all those leaves control the tree I've never had a lawn they've hit ctrl a and then delete it's just like oh yeah now we don't have to deal with any of those problems they copied and pasted a lot of leaves in place of the ctrl a ctrl x I'm tired of it nobody wants to deal not corpses not corpses just like anybody who's left over what if any of the Chitauri wanted to surrender or something every last ultron bot we got him and then of course snapping and deleting that one I guess is more acceptable because yeah you would do that I'm just tired of like all of the enemies just like oh we're dead I thought you were talking about the fact the way it affects cleanup because having a hive mind thing die and everything dies that definitely is valid I think the Chitauri one was a bit of a stretch but it was like they cut off from they like robot flash but the thing I was going to appreciate about Avengers is that they left bodies everywhere there was destruction everywhere and we even got an incoming built a story off the idea of cleanup crews and stuff it's like hey not bad whereas now they don't even want to do that it's like no just get rid of it all so that there's no cleanup no problems just like it might as well never happened that's why I find it so frustrating minimize the effect on the world it's really really annoying a world that they're not continuing whatever whatever it's just more a principled outrage than anything the ones that helped them they got turned they're dead they died and turned to leaves too nobody cries for the unicorns that saved the world that is kind of weird how they just I they just de-spawned the unicorn they just turned to leaves maybe the unicorns are right to hate humans they get used and then thrown away Helen Marin died as well and the last thing she says is like ah you were a true god or something you were a hero you had one good-ish idea ah what a god there's an idea there's an idea in the there's an idea in like if you dig deep deep down under all of the grime and the CGI and the fucking leaves there's an idea underneath there that Helen Marin's character really despises humans and doesn't like them and thinks they're not worthwhile and then eventually Shazam is the one who's like no humans are cool see I'm a hero and I can do heroic things and I'm great and I'll work with you to stop this big or evil it's not a complex idea but there's an idea there and they even they don't do it well because they can't do anything well no so yeah everyone's like crying and sad cause boy dead wait wait wait wait wait wait someone sent me this image and I need you to see it what have you inflicted upon us what is sent me this what have you sent me those floopy legs what have you what have you what have you what have you what have you what have you got a little ferret there and rags the dog or horses and yeah a little kiwi and yeah look at that little fella look at him running with those floopy legs he's trying his best and I appreciate it this is great this particular rendering of Friggy is hilarious I love it the little smile there that's what I like what was the inspiration this representation of Friggy I need to know I'm not sure what would be the inspiration for that but I like it they do they do they're kind of like Shrek ears ugh the witch doctor's clothes you see it's not the lore on that the lore on that is I don't know yet be announced what the hell so anyway that's good this is a line I couldn't make out this is the best approximation I have of it I think it's what she said if anyone has any better memory of it go ahead but oh wait no actually wait there's something before this which is um he's dead they're all sad then you have I remember who says it but someone says he was a hero someone says he was a hero and a god and the wizard says yeah that's probably actually and the wizard said he should be laid to rest like one yeah now probably the only character if I were there that would say fuck you he's a human he's not a god well well hold on he said he should be laid to rest like one which in and of itself is a nice like that is a gesture if he should be laid to rest like a hero no like a god that isn't in and of it like a god the DC world lay Aries to rest like the god that he is that's what I'm saying like it's not it's just take credit he's a human he was a human what he did was human he deserves to have customs yeah humans are heroes that's what I'm saying like the idea that because he did something so great that he gets to have a gods later it's like no fuck you humans like enough of this crazy shit where it's like ah after all the gods just did you kidding me these are all fucking gods look what they just did yeah I look at what Wonder Woman did in 1994 I don't need you stupid god customs just bury him like a man yep because he's a human being and a really good one which would actually just bury him anyway like a like normally it would actually change the plot light if he was to be buried like a human well because the thing that's worth emphasizing for everybody is this is a very emotional scene as it should be sacrifices life to save the world and his family and it's very sad it's the payoff that it is exactly what it is trying to be which is this character has made a sacrifice and isn't it sad that he's gone someone just said was there anything left to bury it's like actually yes inexplicably yes it's just he was it's his human body with a bit of stuff on his face feel like a weird big stuff on his face all things considered not looking too bad yeah I mean you died still if you were in pieces like loads of flashy intestines like oh jeez we have to pick all these up or it's just like his bottom half or just like legs and it looked a comical spine sticking out with like an among us bone that's comedy then the part where I was a little bit confused they're at his funeral fucking god realm burying him which like I said just like fuck that burying him in his he's an American burying me in Philly Philly and so Darla's looking at the grave and I think she says like I said I think she says will his light ever come back I'm not sure if it's that I need to keep listening because I was like what the fuck question is that and then the wizard says the staff is drained of magic only the spark of a god can restore its power and there are no gods left the implication being we could get his light back but you know the staff's out of battery so and it's kind of like you think to yourself wait why is the staff out of battery yeah is it exploded it functions it's just low on charge it's still intact it's still intact you know like it didn't get destroyed by this and you restored it before did they ever have to do that but basically my my my my conniptions are that it should why did this was never a thing it never ran out of battery before that was was that ever a fun it can break in half but it's still enough to give people powers back even when it's broken in half no it's out of power okay yeah and they've said it all up they said only a god can restore it and there's none left that's true there are none left that have powers and then you hear the wonderful voice of Gal Gadot say there is one there is one you see her legs on the fucking soundtrack actually like cooms all over the screen yeah no yodeling though so loud I legit was like calm down I have brought myself a goud not even an action scene oh she's so terrible and the thing is the first thing you think is wait where were you how did you get here and how did you get here how did you get here how did you know to come here there's so many questions and they will answer none of them she's just here to pose doing the pose there it's like she knows that she's being filmed the only thing they explain is that she got the god letter that they apparently wrote her that's all they give us by the way I just really need to emphasize for chat what the fuck what the experience was like so just ignore the shitty fucking cock ass dialogue for a second and ignore the fact that they're burying him in a very inappropriate place totally it's somber somber somber somber music somber this is very like Billy Batson's dead like we are mourning him we are mourning him and this goes on for quite a bit they really drag it out they really milk this scene yeah and then out of nowhere all of a sudden we hard cut to just it just assaults you they don't do a recomposition they don't do like a transition they don't slow down the Wonder Woman thing it's not like why wouldn't it be a soft like piano vision yeah it's epic it's epic look it's Wonder Woman you liked Wonder Woman right after Wonder Woman 934 yeah she's great yeah it's like they ripped it straight from the BVS soundtrack it's definitely a different composition but like you can tell it's different but it's different almost in the worst way it is loud the actual one from Batman V Superman starts off pretty chill it's not like super duper loud it's like the arrangement they had for 1984 where it was really loud it was just a bunch of instruments all at once thrown at you not a lot of clarity exactly I described it to Capital O earlier as it was like I got hit in the face with a shovel with the soundtrack it was just a shovel right in the face she has this she has this face of like yeah I'm here so things are good now I bet you're all incredibly happy I'm here aren't I fucking cool there's only one exit everyone's like woah yeah the wizard he's just like mmm and I really like it don't check on his face in that scene he just looks unimpressed we're having a moment here fucking idiot because he probably saw Wonder Woman 84 I know what you fucking did yeah and so she reignites the staff because she just hits it into the ground that's all it takes cause she's a god I guess it starts to regrow well just plants and stuff making the place much more peaceful and happy then boom Sam's hand and arm and Eugene's like oh my god it's Jeb be that he goes no it's just me I'm back yeah so we need to talk about this you don't get to kill your character and then bring them back two minutes later you don't get to do that you don't get to extract all of the emotions that you get from people with a heroic sacrifice only to not commit to what the heroic sacrifice entails which is never having that character again you don't get to do that it's bullshit I hate it you don't have to do that it's just such a missed opportunity like you know this is gonna be I mean I guess they filmed this like 5 million years ago so I don't know if they already knew they won't be getting another one anyway or another one by or another but if you would have written it not that stupidly where he just comes back after two minutes as he just said you could have had Sam have like this heroic ending you feel like giving the film a little bit of props you're like wow you killed him yeah you get those cojones storytelling choice but they can't commit and they don't want to commit and you don't get any points you get negative points absolutely negative points you retroactively lose yourself points by undoing something yeah it's like one step forward then three steps back pretty much I got pretty excited when I thought oh my god they might actually kill him I was like it won me over so much because it's not a good movie at all up until that point but I was like holy shit they actually killed him wow and then I actually got kind of excited thinking about oh what could they do if they did get an X movie even less chance if it was Sam 3 thank god yeah there's a lot you could do and then of all the ways to of undoing but they could have done something where like if all the ways to bring him back they picked the most cringe like Diana X Machina way possible it's awful I didn't bother to show up for the actual threat but I'm here now yeah no it's true she's an actual god and also by the way this raises a question you can use the staff to fix the garden what's the point of the apple that's a good question I don't actually know what we're supposed to gather exactly I thought something weird was happening cause he died with the tree the tree's energy I literally have no because what you just said we wouldn't write it but it's what they do it was just the staff that yeah what the fuck cause that just saves the realm by hitting the floor are you kidding me like everything in the movie was pointless yeah everything it touches and then also by the way tonally oh zombie what was fucking what was that it's funny you guys like zombies it's the first joke it's the first draft and also inappropriate very inappropriate most of the jokes are inappropriate given the context what's actually happening David said they had intended to show someone like Batman or Superman trying to get into the dome on a news report or something but couldn't that would make it worse that would make it worse cause then the second the dome is down we'd be like where the fuck where they and then they can obviously get in through the rock of eternity doors that anyone could just talk to them about and then where were they up to that point it's like don't just don't David just stop stop that's why you know after going through the whole movie and thinking about all this stuff the fact that he's like yeah I kind of knew it would flap and it's like well why didn't you try to make it good I guess he would have the perspective well I made something that I think was good but the studio more or less sort of sent it out to die to which I would respond yeah they kind of did but like if your film was incredible I don't think they would have I want to mention by the way Amthena gets her powers back too yeah because of this cool no lasting consequences at all for anything yeah exactly I just can't help but compare this cause Rath of Khan and Search for Spock that's an example of a character dies but then comes back but I just think about that and the firstly he doesn't come back two minutes later secondly it's an entire film of sacrifice of consequences of major shit happening before they finally get to a point where they've both mechanically thematically earned this restoration and it's just I just can't help but feel like there might have been an opportunity here even if it would have been nowhere near as good as that but you have him remain dead for this film and if you really fucking need to bring him back you need to have a whole film that is filled with top to bottom sacrifice consequences a journey consequences yeah you know there are examples of stories where a character dies and then comes back and then that's meaningfully dealt with don't say what it is if you know what it is then meaningfully deal with you know like that like somebody having to grapple with the effect that that would have on their sense of self and mortality and life in general but I mean it's just back to crack and jokes it's just back to normal like it's like nothing bad happened except you got all of the juicy juicy emotions that you could extract by having that heroic sacrifice my brain really glazed over after this I don't know how much I really absorbed about it to me it's top of the course of the rest of the movie we have seen countless examples of the shittiest writing tactics to avoid having to deal with problems throughout yep and of course they kill someone and bring them back in to sleep that's like one of the classic you do not do this as a writer cardinal sin type writing stuff pretty mad I think yeah your general standard writing advice would advise not to do that any of these things there are so many really awful tropes that I thought we were all aware it's a really bad did you not learn in all of your fast and furious movies that you don't do this I mean this is maybe the most egregious product well wait did fast and furious bring back a character who died wasn't there that guy in Tokyo I think so yeah how does that happen in that world though I could have sworn even the actor in an interview said like he thought he was dead and they brought him back and he was like okay they used the car to like rev of mattery and I think what happened was that the film it was initially they brought him back in a story that was set before then but then it just kept going and then they brought him back anyway in a story that is definitely after that happened and Han was his name that was the guy and he just came back even though he died I'm gonna explain it that's really funny he respawned I'm not dying of fast and furious they're bringing him back yeah I heard about that too yeah um look and I'm just thinking about the fact that it's Wonder Woman and they're talking about gods and it's just a spark just lit up in my brain where it's like the term deus ex machina you know were you missing I think you missed you missed the conversation I don't mean I think you said like a literal a literal deus ex machina the memes had a bite moment yes you were having a bite moment that's okay though but yes you're like it is a deus ex he's actually a god who comes in at the end to save the day oh my god I know it's not one to one but you know how she does that and she starts like walking off Wonder Woman and there's a conversation I haven't talked about in a sec but she's walking away and it felt to be like such a even though some with facial expressions like the fucking the simpsons thing with like you know my work here is done and I just want body to be like you do anything you didn't do anything the cost you anything you just turned up pressed a thing and then like you left it to the 17 year old kid to save the world while you were off doing I don't know nothing at all and then she's like coming in being like ah see look at how she's doing the kind god meme this cost you nothing asshole yeah it's like the flash and the Snyder cut presses to save the world button yep yeah I'd hope you would hate this shit you could tell she's just like man I'm pretty cool yeah okay whatever yeah you know Wonder Woman really does not strike me as somebody who should be played as arrogant um if anything she is incredibly graceful and humble but you know I will say like I find it fascinating when people say oh yeah Gal Gadot and body's Wonder Woman she really doesn't she really really really doesn't I don't know why people say that she doesn't really look like Wonder Woman though Wonder Woman's more muscular than she is yeah that's the it's a superficial resemblance at most um but there are better choices to be sure um and like that little smirk in BVS where it's like oh yeah you know the world's ending but I'm loving it that was actually an improvisation by Gal Gadot so that kind of shows that she doesn't really get it um as far as concerned and of course Zach doesn't get it because he left it in um yeah that's why we need new Wonder Woman stories to like sort of reset what people's expectations and understanding of that character is because you start to see it seep into like the perception of that character it's really lame it is really lame um it's damage to DC yep oh he's so colossal um I'm just reminding of the second episode of the old Justice League cartoon where there was the question of oh where's Superman where's Batman where are these members that we don't want to deal with this episode and it's just like oh Superman's dealing with an earthquake Batman is busy doing something else and so they actually account for it and then the funniest part of that is Superman does actually show up and saying oh it was just a minor aftershock we didn't uh it was a false alarm but the thing is that cartoon it dealt with the whole Justice League problem better than the fucking live action thing that's meant to be more mature I don't get it I don't get how you don't at least have a throw away in there to try to fuck it all fuck it all they do the uh they do the really cringe joke again um joke about the age difference as well oh yeah and so the difference this time is the first time around the parents both said like no weird but the kids were like hmm this time the mom says it's weird and the kids and the dad of all like hey because the joke being of course well even the dad is like well come on it's Gal Gadot she's so hot I was like wow you would not get away with this if they were flipped I'm just saying you know I why would you why would you make that kind of joke I don't get it they think it's funny I thought that everybody agreed with the whole what's Edward or whatever in Twilight like I thought everybody agreed that that was weird yeah it's difficult to do in a way that doesn't come across a very way especially with like the relationship started the first one with manipulation this one yeah I mean doesn't even know her I don't know anything about her I don't know yeah it's all just like what are we doing what's happening help me out here I don't know I don't know what we're doing anymore so uh before she leaves she says it was an amazing thing you did the sacrifice you made and you brought this world back to life perhaps God and man can live in peace he's the only god left if they ever remade the room I feel like they should cast Cal Gadot they needed to I'm fed up with this world she'd be perfect we can feed up this world together oh my god I need to get into every deep fake program right now and make this happen get deep in there yeah yeah I don't know this this this this shit I just wanted to end so here we go uh he says hey who wants their powers back and then he looks at the wizard and he goes we can do that right and the wizard says yeah and so they give the kids all the power it's like well done you broke the only thing protecting you as a narrative being that the kids ended up with the power through recklessness you know and now you're just doing it because fuck it yeah because you guys did such a great job this time around I don't understand it you know like all of those people who got killed by the cyclopsis and everything like that no no no we didn't talk about them that was avoidable it was avoidable by the wizard telling him to not break the staff at any cost and moreover there's really I'm pretty sure only Billy has any level of like damn that's kind of on us nobody else seems to really care I want to sit the wizard down and be like so these lads here these are all by the way you didn't choose the rest of them you chose Billy because he was pure of heart right even though you said it was the wiseness of his heart whatever the fuck but anyway these kids you didn't choose them but you're giving it all to him now it's like yeah it's like how about how about we take it off Dala because she's like nine and we give it to let's say Jackie Chan or about that and then if he says well Jackie Chan's not pure of heart I'd be like oh oh isn't he he's pure of chest okay well you know um who you maybe give it to the wizard to judge who's pure of heart not superman I was gonna say give it to the superman but you can't not in this world you can't trust him with that kind of power you'll kill everything maybe you give it to hell Jordan if he's out there somewhere yeah well what about kill the reaps could we give it to him he's like nope not pure of heart oh pure of heart really you know best Mr. Wizard you give it to the fucking child over I'm sure if Keanu Reeves saw two bullies like punching and beating up a crippled person he wouldn't ever intervene with that he just I think he'd go up to him and say hey stop it and then they would oh shit it's John Wick and then he'd sit down and like work out their problems why do you feel the need to bully other people why are you doing this the school counselor John Wick yeah I just I hate it but run along they ask Amthina what are her plans now and she's like well I guess you're only gonna take care of the realm and she says no I'm gonna let that realm heal for now I'm gonna take some time off with the common folk and see what there is to learn and then she holds Freddy's hand it's like oh no no it's no no no no she is 6,000 years old you can do better there are younger women out there too it sounds like a fun fun sentence to say like it sounds like a meme but no she is actually 6,000 years old she's older than the pyramids the same mistake the same mistake they don't actually shouldn't act like she's 6,000 years old Jack's like kind of like a stilted 20 year old she's 1,500 years old older than the pyramids comes back to take the staff and basically just says I'm going on holiday I'm tired of prison I'm getting out of this movie as quickly as I can pretty much yeah oh my god guys she's literally older than human civilization yeah it says that the earliest civilizations developed between 4,000 3,000 are you sure about that that's what National Geographic Society says how old is how old is summa let's see it's summa and it came out in 2016 it was roughly 6,000 years ago yeah that would be probably what they're referring to that was one of the earliest civilizations it's not just people cohabitating it's like civilization proper how old is Jericho I'll hold the book probably not that old are you talking about Clive Barker's Jericho by Clive Barker no and I'm not talking about the TV show Jericho either I'm talking about the City of Jericho how old is Jericho first walled city in history the oldest city in the world I assume we're not counting stuff like first our agricultural revolution or the military that's not what Rags is counting the point being is that she is old basically as old as human civilization when the first humans finally got together to create civilization and agriculture and like a hierarchy of leadership and started to build buildings and settle down and create civilization she was born then as well and she was probably an adult by then as well so she watched all of humanity throughout the years progress and grow and this is the one yep this is the one it wasn't even you know like the great men of history it wasn't like a Caesar Augustus or an Abraham Lincoln or a carrot top it was this guy it was Zach or Zaki or Jake or whatever his name is this is the one Freddy you racist Freddy his name is Freddy this is the one Freddy finally someone worthy of my I'm no divinity or whatever so literal last note says what's my superhero name and the wizard goes your name is and then he goes of course and then Freddy goes I still think we can beat it and then the credits happen yay that's when I left we do I wasn't gonna make this but they are in the consequential the first one is the peacemakers hard caught in the fat guy genuinely it looks like just trying to bait or promote they'll be kind of using the just deciding peacemaker season 2 I imagine that's all that is I don't know do you think that they have the money to do that I don't know what James Gunn's plans are but what else is that scene supposed to be is it just memes do you think it wasn't actually leading to anything it probably was leading to something originally he's not happy anymore is it not if I can right the after credits we'll go through the other one quick because this one's a dead end in the first film Mark Strong's in prison and he gets visited by a caterpillar with a robotic device on him saying basically that they have plans they're going to do things and it's gonna be amazing and it ends with them being like hey hey hey this one Mark Strong's got a big beard and the caterpillar tins up and he's like where have you been it's been two years and the caterpillar's like it takes ages for me to get around okay but you know the plans they're real coming together and then Mark Strong says tell me everything and he says I will I just got to do one thing and then leaves and then Mark Strong's like what the hell and then it ends and that was gonna be Shazam 3 but not anymore no Mr. Mind yeah but instead you got these characters who aren't in like the comics as far as I'm aware no I looked it up that seems odd but especially considering how lame they were and the idea of a supervillain caterpillar sounds like way more interesting to me inherently yeah but that's the end oh and they had a little Avenger's joke as well where he said Avenger's Society I kind of like that alright we're done Shazam Fury of the Gods terrible terrible terrible terrible really bad one of the worst I would say I think this one is actually one of the worst crazy for the DC universe you're really competing for like that bottoms yeah and you know you find out it's like ooh it's not it's suffering at the box office you're like okay good this used to be an example to the rest what Mr. Mind man this is what happens hanging from the gallows and the courtyard well Abba was really helpful too so yeah I don't know it's yeah it took us what like five hours for you but it's to break this one down it's still very long I know it's not as long as the recent Marvel things but still it's very long same it's riddled yeah some of the most noticeably shitty writing tactics like I said this thing was rushed just makes you wonder like what how was it rushed when it's four years after the first film how does that happen this is what I mean like sometimes I wonder about writers where it's like did the same writer did the first one do this one I don't think so one of the two writers worked on the first one the other one oh yeah yeah that's right stuff like that makes me wonder if you're a part of let's say you know I wrote Shazam one and then I talked to Samberg and he's like yeah not looking like we're gonna be able to make this for another three years or something so I'd be like well I'm probably gonna tool away at a sequel script you know a little bit here and there maybe build it up redraft it over time small amounts of effort and then when they go right you have to write that I'd be like oh gee okay I guess I'll stop from scratch wink wink and then get a lot of stuff that I you know what I mean does any of them ever do that you should at least stop point it you know what does take pride in your work mean when's Mario out that's out on the fifth of May I believe so it's real close oh boy the more that I'm interested in that we'll see perhaps I mean there's no way compared to all these films there's no way there's no way that it could be as bad as these movies no way indeed no way you know my gripes are probably gonna be on the voice acting side but I don't imagine the film itself is going to be we even know we've seen a few more clips of Chris Pratt actually trying to do the Mario voice yeah everyone's I think the sense of it is turning hardcore right before this thing comes out and if it turns out to be good that's gonna be a crazy little journey it's had that'll be real interesting if it turns out to be good cause even where I'm at now I don't really expect it to be good I expect it to be fine I think that's where I'm at I expect it to be a totally fine animated film but like I ain't gonna be up there with like the best of the best which maybe that's not a terrible thing um well I mean it's not right it could be worse probably but we'll see is there anything like I'm so ready to eject this out of my head I'm ready to eject the film but maybe there's something to talk about in terms of the meta of like cause I mean it's in the title right the state of DC oh we talked about it a couple times in the stream but this is doing bad what does it mean going forward just means they already knew this was a titanic equivalent of a film they're moving on already uh yeah it's already probably just oh that's they've already got Tom Cruise talking about how the flash is gonna be really great yeah the flash I think they hope can at least bring back some money this one I think they abandoned when does the flash come out the flash is out in June that really is the most interesting DC film like for now until the reset cause it's just like oh I guess we're gonna get a glimpse into what their plans were before they changed everything and like what even this film is going to be and whether it's gonna be quality and like whether it's gonna make money um because all I think you can gauge from like the um box office of this film and it's the general response to it is like man DC is like not it just ain't worth much like in the eyes of the public it's not really a draw and I feel like this says a lot about how little anybody actually cared about Shazam all the people were saying it was good but nobody has anything to say about it the first film and nobody really cared about this one either people said yeah it's good it's fun but you couldn't say anything you couldn't tell anybody anything about it and this film was even more so got that problem than that one in a week nobody will be talking about it it'll be done it'll be over gotta get this episode out on Moola quickly before people like wait you come oh wait yeah I don't care about Shazam anymore John Wick's coming out and Resident Evil 4 and Mario yay this film is like those Doctor Who aliens who you know you look at them and then you turn away and you forget that they exist yeah it's the silence this is the silence of films it's really bad yeah it suffers from it's like you said Moola it's pretty much all of the pretty standard problems that something can suffer from it has them in multiple different ways as well it's kind of fascinating what I think you said it a few times Rags as well like what does the script even look like like what is it what is the process that results in this kind of script I legitimately don't know you would think that somebody would give a shit like somebody would check in if you were dropping like a hundred million dollars or whatever on a movie you think that you'd be watching over it like a hawk you'd be you'd have your eyes on the script and all the production elements and everything like that I mean especially the script you think you'd have guys there every day in the writer's room making sure that it all you know work together but they just didn't give a fuck it's like they just said oh crap we need you got to write the script in an afternoon and we'll get some people to write the Shazam movie yeah okay cool we got a script writing doesn't sell superheroes and CGI sells I mean it doesn't sell here's the lesson that's being learned right now by hollywooders oh shit like this isn't just a sure thing making superhero films it's gonna reach the point where you know when we're talking about like the films that are coming out this year wouldn't surprise me if the Mario movie makes a billion dollars and that'll be like the most successful film of the year up to this point bidding out like big Marvel films and I guess a relatively bigger DC film yeah wouldn't surprise me either and following as well the likes of Black Panther not crossing a billion dollars the continually deteriorating viewership of like Star Wars right now where what Mando season 3 had a premiere numbers like lower than Booker Boba Fett and Obi-Wan Kenobi like damn man what's going on guys it's not very worthwhile so yeah this is Gotham Knights oh yeah that's right Gotham Knights it does feel like they're just they're just trying to get out like everything they had like pre-gun, pre-buy out sort of thing just kind of trying to get it out as fast as possible just so they can too much money like in these projects you know Aquaman probably cost like 200, 250 million dollars you gotta release it gotta make some money back it's weird so if do you think that the Flash will do the reset in the movie itself nope, nah I don't think so, I think that that kind of being very poy about what the reset actually looks like for this year I don't think it will have anything to do with anything that they've set up before it'll just be like from okay we start here you know like just sort of uh, mentally I guess almost on a map level I think you're probably right because you would think from a writing perspective you'd probably want to use the magical bullshit powers that the Flash has to do the reset in the story itself but then you would undermine Aquaman at the bottom of this you undermine that and I guess Blue Beetle as well but more for me it would be like I don't want any attachments to this universe like not in any way shape get rid of it completely excise it like a tumor just get rid of it what's there to say? are there three good characters in this entire universe that are worth even holding on to? most people don't talk about characters that talk about actors, that's what people talk about cause there's no fun characters that we're trying to save like Margot Robbie and stuff yeah no get rid of her too please get rid of her too please first on the chopping board James Gunn really likes working with Margot Robbie right so that's the thing though I don't think he can pick a choose I think he has to get rid of everything I think it would actually be kind of unfair to a lot of actors to just pick the ones that you want to the individual ones you want to keep while getting rid of others yeah if you can't get if you can't get Cavill to come back when he's like the people the one that people want to come back the most it seems from the beginning yeah yeah I've also heard people saying they're going to keep Ezra Miller I really don't think they would they're not going to keep Ezra Miller exactly the only source on that is literally a source that says trust me bro along with a bunch of unrelated information it is the clickbaity is the clickbaity titles but people are treating it as fact cause no one fucking clicks the articles that they're reacting to anymore no you're just talking the headline oh that's got to be true I think that they're just going to be very vague it's the reason why we haven't heard about any actual Wonder Woman film as part of chapter one which just seems like if you're doing a reset you're doing Batman Wonder Woman like obviously maybe there is a Wonder Woman film but you don't feel like you can talk about it until Flash is out and Sam with Aquaman what are the plans with Aquaman or Flash or whatever it's like well you don't want to talk about that before the film that costs like $300 million comes out well that's the awkward thing right they have to still sell these films before they can get to the new stuff so they have to kind of tow the line before they can finally be completely honest with it for as much as that's the case they still want these new films out by 2025 which is not really far away we're going to be finding out about people getting cast for these roles this year all production timelines this year while all of these films are coming out because to some extent you don't want to wait you want to get these films done you want to get new DC films out there but hopefully they're not in too much of a rush and then screw everything up again yeah well the good thing is I think after the Flash there's only two more that were already that would need all of Aquaman and that's it and then that's over then it's over thank god the first project of DC Studios is Creature Commandos oh is it Creature Commandos that comes out first and then Waller I think and then Superman which by the way nah Superman's first I don't know why you would do it like that sorry this is just turning into rambling about a thing that doesn't even exist yet the point is DC it's like the twilight of DC EU and what a shitty twilight it's turning out to be just a slow painful death like yeah the future of DC is very uncertain at the moment so it's the best shape it's been in years Marvel's been looking for that so you know they've got good company yeah we got some good eating ready boys we're going to really be feasting on all these amazing superhero films at least we got Domia 3 that's right yeah fingers crossed big thing that's on the way that I'm excited for are you for remake getting all the kind of ratings you would want yeah baby all signs going together right now a really great demo and everyone scores are really high so it's like give give give that's exciting um what I was going to say that kind of wraps the stream so what we'll do first is give give cap metal and meme a chance to talk a little bit about what they're up to whatever that may be cap once you go first devs episode 4 it's coming it's almost done look forward to that that's that's all I have for now well you also did a stream in case people didn't hear about it the last time it was we talked with myself and the Pringled about and Elvis correct and it was a swell time go check that out also we did a stream oh my dog's barking like crazy because someone's shooting fireworks off even though it's just a random day I don't know because it's Saturday we also did a stream talking about all quiet on the western front and uh what's the other one with the other two guests on this panel and meme go check that out what a coincidence wowie yeah good times go check those out metal what are you doing hello I am I'm working on a thing a scripted thing yes I'm actually doing a scripted video again and it's uh I'm redrafting right now I'm gonna start recording soon I'm not gonna say what it is yet I thought I might today but I think I need some more redrafts so not yet but there's gonna be a metals forge again next week on John rick 4 on Sunday and that's what I'm up to Resident Evil 4 Strumbles 4 error for the metal channel I linked in description I will sort that out yes don't find that out metals cancelled I think mine has one as well I think it's the at thing because it's not actually linking to yeah those links like to break at some point sometimes it's weird mine is great and amazing meme what are you up to so there's a stream that I've been trying to get out since November that's been like very research heavy and very clip heavy it's a tribute to Kevin Conroy it's 98% done I'm just trying to find I got covid on vacation unfortunately so I've been rebuilding every like I got really sick so I had to rebuild my energy and now I'm rebuilding my voice and routine so I just got to find the energy and the spoons to put in to put the final pieces together and then I'll do a little dress rehearsal for that one to make sure everything gets past and then we'll be good to go on that so there is a countdown timer on my channel ignore that I have to keep pushing that forward because I can't be fucked to delete it and then put it up again so yeah so that will be out when it's out I'll probably change the title to know for realsies when it finally when it finally comes but yeah so that's what I'm working on at the moment so that'll come when it comes very well bring in rags anything you guys want I am probably tomorrow going to be finished with a script for a video so that's exciting after the script is finished of course the video proper will begin to assemble itself I'm not sure how long that will be I'm probably gonna be putting a decent amount of work into this and I think that certainly the efap audiences will really like it and I think that my own well as well on my own channel but I'm just working away things are getting done and I'm yeah look out for more updates potentially I'm just in the dungeon working I'm working on episode 3 Mando working on the video uh yeah so Mando episode 3 is next up coming to you this week probably general efap update as you guys know the last of us is finished all 9 of those have been edited up into a supercut and that'll be premiering next week we're going to try and do that with every tv show we end up finishing but of course same time Mando is running and we have the hopes of Gotham Knights running at the same time and the funniest part of it all is that that one is still actually running as well so technically 3-4 tv shows just about to end and the rest is still continuing and then of course minis being dropped out for super chat catch up and I still want to try and organize us recording a meme of fap when we can and yeah plenty of things on the way so we're still ahead episodes wise so next week there won't be an efap there will instead be that last of us supercut and me and rags and premiering will probably spend the day doing catch up instead you know use the opportunity of being too far ahead to catch up with stuff that's falling behind at the mat and then that means John Wick and RE4 come out and so we'll do John Wick the following week we'll talk all about it but if you wanted to hear us earlier than that it was very well likely that we'll be on the forge with metal on it I don't know who or why exactly who was going to be there who knows I'm just saying that's probably a good place to get opinions for earlier the week after that would be RE4 so that gives two weeks of space for everybody to play the f**k out of that game because that's going to be one we're going to want to talk about the details of extensively very excited which also means you'll be seeing streams from myself, doomably bringing in metal following any technical problems yeah and I know the plenty and like you know like as and drinkers of they're all going to be streaming it so that's going to be a game where everybody streams because Resident Evil 4 is kind of a well known game you know people do not know where to watch first it's going to be probably like five streams at the same time so Mark will be streaming it too I imagine yeah that's where we should be and John maybe he might be so yeah another gaming f**k on the way and once all those things are out and done I mean it's kind of been insane lately I've seen a video two to three days on eFap with the mula channel yeah there has guys in a rush I hope that it's not that you're like ah yes this is normal yeah it's not normal a lot of stuff's been coming out and try to work on mainline stuff as well you know how it is yeah exactly oh we passed a hundred days worth of eFap oh boy my god good golly miss Molly celebrate um but yeah that's that I suppose where's my clown horn thank you all so much for watching I'm proud of you guys for actually being able to maybe remember the film and now it's getting flushed from my brain and now I'm off the go we're freeing up some space I will release it into the ether by Shazam Fury of the Gods goodbye goodbye goodbye to you chatterer thank you so much goodbye to you all we will see you next time beep up I'm a bye bye I'm all over the place