 Does the narcissist think about you? My answer to that question May actually surprise a lot of you because I would say yes They do think about you and you might say What if they discard in me What if it looks like they've moved on and They're with someone else. Do they still think about me then? Yes, they still think about you then and That is why they will often hoover you. You may not have talked to them for a while, but then here they come They're blowing up your phone They're sliding in your DMs And that's how you know they were thinking about you If they weren't then how could they hoover you but they think of us In a very different way to how we might think about our past relationship partners Narcissists see us as objects They don't think of us as separate individual people With our own Once needs desires goals and dreams They don't think of us like that We're just objects that exist to serve them So when they're thinking about coming back, they're thinking about What can you do for them? What can you give to them? How are you gonna make them feel better? That's what they're thinking about when they think about you or at least when they're considering a Hoover, but they'll also think about you in a way where They're just complaining about you inside their heads They're just reaffirming these false beliefs that they already have about you About how you're no good About how you never did anything good for them About you caused all of these problems They play the victim inside their heads They have to tell themselves these stories so that they can feel better about themselves So yeah, they're thinking about you in that way too about how bad and wrong You were meant to be But of course deep down they know They know you're not I Mean the reason why they stayed with you for so long is because it was benefiting them They were having a good time They had a good ride with you That's why they stayed with you for so long Because they were getting something out of it your attention your validate validation Your money a place to stay All of these things So deep down they know that You're really not that bad at all and actually you were good for them and That is why Many of them end up hovering you and they'll come back and complain and everything will go back to normal But sometimes you just got to stop and think why did you come back then because it's all a lie It's all a scam Everything they tell you is a lie But they don't think of you in a significant way Not as a separate person Not as someone who was anything meaningful to them they don't think about people in that way It's all about what you have What you're gonna give to them That's how they think of you, but you may be glad to know that If you treated them well if you were a good source of supply to them and You gave them a place to stay you gave them money You gave them concert attention you spent all of your time with them and yeah, they're gonna be thinking about you and They're gonna feel like they lost something and they may even feel Regret to some extent they feel pain just like everyone else No one wants to lose something of value and of course they do feel it They do feel it when they've lost something good They know the difference between What is good and what is not good for them? So when they lose you? Yes, of course, they will be thinking about you and they'll be thinking about How things were so good back then so things were so much easier and you don't know what they're going through now It's most likely a lot worse Than what they were complaining about with you Because we know how they exaggerate things They want you to think that the situation they had with you was so bad and now what they've moved on to is so much better But in reality, it's the other way around You just got to think about how difficult it is for a normal person To meet someone good Just think about it in your own life How you struggle to meet someone good someone who values you someone who would take good care of you It's not easy and it's a hundred times harder for a narcissist Because they're not look they're not just looking for someone like that They're looking for a fool a doormat a punching bag Someone who will do whatever they want and there aren't many people like that around but that's what they're looking for and Maybe you were the closest thing to that and it's very difficult for them to find that again Especially with all of this information out now on narcissism people know what to look for As you know, I've been doing this for over four and a half years now. I've been putting out these videos Since before it was mainstream it became pretty mainstream probably the last One or two years. I was doing this four and a half years ago. Maybe I helped to make it mainstream. Who knows? Yeah, this information is out there now People know what to look for People know the signs So it's not gonna be so easy for them to find someone like you again It's not gonna be so easy for them at all. So Don't think that they can just come into your life And they've done all of these things to you they've lied to you They manipulated you they abused you they stole from you. They did all of this and then they can just move on and Find someone else and they're gonna be okay And you're gonna be the one who's left behind suffering and struggling It never works out like that. I've seen these situations so many times I've had hundreds of clients over the last four years So I can tell you I already know how things end up for them I Already know their future. I know how it goes and I'm sure many of us that's One of the motivating factors for why we don't want to become like them Because we all know how they end up in the end and Once you've had such a consistent pattern of behavior over a long period of time you can't just Wake up one day and decide not to do that anymore Then you're stuck like that for the rest of your life and that is their unfortunate fate in the end is that Even though they may start to realize Who and what they are There's really nothing they can do about it. They just have to accept it and they just have to find Some fool who's willing to take care of them But even then they know it's not gonna last Whatever they get involved with they always see it as something temporary Just as it was with you, that's why they could never be vulnerable. They can never be intimate They never wanted to invest anything into the relationship Despite how loyal and committed you were to them despite everything that you invested into them. They knew it was temporary They knew it was gonna end at some point Maybe you'd figure them out and you'd want nothing to do with them or Even if you were this perfect person who Would stay loyal to them and do whatever they want no matter what Doesn't matter because they would get bored of that anyway So you see they always knew They knew Before they even met you They already knew that whoever they were gonna meet next It was gonna have an end They already knew that so of course they're not gonna think of you in any other way when it's all over When they first met you they saw you as an object and when it ends That's how they think of you That's the only way they can think of anyone and it's sad, but this is just how it is. There are people walking on this earth Who see everyone as Porns on a chessboard They see everyone as objects Just tools for them to use and you will know if someone sees you like that You will know it because It's always one-sided You're always doing all of the work You're investing everything you have into them, but there's no reciprocation. There's no equal exchange And No matter how much you try to open up to them and get them to talk They just can't be vulnerable. They can't be intimate. They can't have a deep connection with you No matter how much time you spend to spend with them. It's like You never knew who they were you never got to know them Even after all of that time and you feel like they never really took the time to get to know you you never Really sat down and had a proper conversation with them and it just felt so strange for you because You can understand why you couldn't understand why couldn't things just be normal Why did it have to be different? Maybe you look around at other people's relationships You're looking on social media, or maybe you go out somewhere to eat and you see other people They could behave normally They can show affection to each other and then you just look at your relationship with the narcissist and you think Why couldn't we have something like that? Of course the reason why is because the person you were dealing with just saw you as an object a tool But don't worry about it. I know many of you you fear that and The narcissist will lead you to believe this as well that there's this whole other side to their personality There's another side to them that you don't know they're very different when you're not around They can be everything that you wanted them to be Just not for you for someone else That's what they want you to think that's what every narcissist wants you to think That they can be everything you wanted them to be but only was someone else So whatever you wanted from them, whatever they were held from you When it's all over they give it to someone else And then you're looking on their social media or they're sending you pictures and videos and you see them have That was someone else And you feel like you've lost out you feel like you're you're missing something But they're just trying to make you jealous It's all fake. It's just as fake as what it was with you when you first met them Everything they displayed to you it was a false impression. It was a facade It's really no different They're never gonna have anything special with anyone They're never gonna experience true intimacy because they can't be vulnerable They're never gonna have a deep connection Not just with you with anyone It's always gonna be fake and the reason why is because they lack empathy They're completely self-absorbed. They only care about themselves They only care about what they want and for the from the amount of time that you spent with them You should know that by now, but just remember how much you cared about them You do have empathy and you can take That gift And you can share it with someone else Someone who shares those same positive traits Kindness compassion generosity you can find someone like that you can find someone Who loves the way you love and I think that's what everyone wants I mean just imagine that from the moment you met the narcissist You pulled your heart and soul into them. You gave them everything you had Just imagine if you could meet someone like that How amazing would that be and you can meet someone like that? It will happen for you. It all starts by Recognizing how you got involved in this and Working your way back Taking a different path Doing things differently, but unfortunately I was gonna say many but Actually, it's most Most people they never really heal from this They don't they stay stuck in the same recycle meeting the same types of people again and again And they never really move on Maybe a lot of them just don't know how to move on Maybe it's too painful for them to do the work and yeah, I know what it's like to be alone I know what it's like to feel lonely. I've had that many times before my life But I don't feel that anymore and it's not just because I've got Nala, but it's also because I got myself You need to enjoy the time that you spend with yourself Getting to know yourself The most important relationship we have in our lives is that relationship with ourselves That's more important than any relationship we have with anyone else and that It's something But I can go into greater detail in my one-on-one coaching sessions Which you can book from my website, which is narksafiver.co.uk It's really good. I have coached hundreds of people over the last four years Including doctors Lawyers and even some celebrities as well and And Yeah, I believe my coaching sessions are very effective. I've learned a lot of things From my research and my own personal experience And I've got a lot of things that I can share with you and Also things that I can tailor make to your situation Things that you can't find online on Google and YouTube So yeah, if that interests you when I want coaching with me narks Fiver You can book online now. It's narksfiver.co.uk But yeah, that's it. They do think about you Just not in the way that you might like Not in the way that you might expect Not in the way that you would think of them They think of you as an object an object that Either did or did not perform in the way that they would like Thank you all for joining me And you will have a good day