 For the safety of your smile use pepsidon twice a day see your dentist twice a year Lever Brothers Company presents the pepsidon show my friend Irma created by Cy Howard and starring Marie Wilson as Irma with Joan Banks as Jane Friendship friendship just perfect friendship when other friendships have been forgotten There's will still be hot Being expenses so high a girl has to be mighty careful how she invests her money Me Jane Stacy. I've always taken great pride in having a good sense of values That is until I met my roommate Irma Peterson There I made my first economic blunder. How do I know? Well one day I said Irma a penny for your thoughts You know I got gypped Don't get me wrong. I love her. It's just that Well, for instance the other day I was reading the newspaper and I said Irma. Yes, Jane isn't this terrible? After all the work and expense they find that that 200-inch mirror on Mount Palomar isn't perfect It has a small wave in it. So what all the mirrors at Coney Island have ways in them and they make money You see what I mean. Well, perhaps some other time. I'll try to straighten Irma out But today I'm just too annoyed to even think straight Jane What is it sweetie? What's the matter with you? No, I don't know. I'm just not myself today I'm so nervous. I could jump out of my skin. Well not in this weather Jane You'll catch pneumonia I'm sorry I mentioned it. Oh, no Jane. I'm your friend and I want to help you I wish you'd tell me what's making you so nervous. All right. I'll tell you it's my job my boss, Mr Thompson, but I thought you said he was a nice man Well, he is honey, but he's just too old to be in business. He's so absent-minded. Oh, don't worry about it Jane my boss. Mr. Clyde's always saying my mind is absent, too Yes, I know honey, but you don't understand it's it's well, it's just that the job is so monotonous I'm tired of this eternal struggle to make an honest living. Well, Jane There's only one way out if you don't want to be honest get married Me Jane a girl has only two choices Alex explained it to me either girl works and supports herself or she gets married and supports her husband I Am I'm not thinking along those lines. I was I was just thinking of quitting my job Why don't you it's not that easy Irma? I couldn't afford to give up my job unless I had another one to go to Yeah, I'll bet if you talk to Richard he let you have your old job back Richard. Yes He used to say working for him was fun. Oh, yes, it it was. Oh, but I couldn't ask Richard My pride would never allow me to well swallow your pride Jane and then if he turns you down you won't go away with an empty stomach Irma in case you've forgotten Richard already has another secretary. Oh, you mean that Carolyn Benson? Yes, and for the life of me. I don't know what Richard sees in her. Well, she's pretty and she has nice legs She's bow-legged. Oh, who'd know the difference when she's sitting on Richard's lap She wouldn't dare Or would she you know Richard tells me that she's rather slow. I wonder if he was talking about her work or oh, no me professor Hello, Jane, you know my my two little Christmas trees One covered with tinsel the other is professor. I'm not in the mood for any of your jokes today It's all right with me Janie. I didn't like it anyway But Janie my darling you seem in a mood. What's wrong? She's disgusted with her job wants to quit Listen Janie jobs don't grow on trees unless of course you are in the lumber business. I Know professor not taking me. I'm not happy working in the gypsy tea room, but I have to make a living You know, there's an old saying Everything that goes up must come down. What's that got to do with me? Nothing. This is a saying for elevator operators Oh professor, I was only trying to cheer you up Janie Seriously, if you don't like your job, why don't you talk to Richard? Maybe you can go back to work for him Oh, no, no, I just couldn't maybe it's my foolish pride. I know what you mean Janie Pride can be a very bad thing for a person You know years ago in the old country when I was young I met a girl She was beautiful rich talented and I wanted to marry her but I was poor and my clothes were rugged So I stopped calling on her your pride. No, her she wouldn't be seen going out with me Look Janie Richard has always spoken very highly of you. Why do you think he wouldn't hire you back? Well? Well for one thing he already has a secretary that Carolyn Benson, maybe there's some way we can get rid of her. Oh, I know how to do it. You do sure Jane Call her up and tell her that Richard murdered his last secretary and you wouldn't want her to suffer the way you did Irma Jane I wish I could help you but you still have a job. So take my advice Don't ditch one job until you have another and speaking of ditches. I think I'll go back to the one I live in Yes, sweetie, I know how you feel about your job and if you're afraid you won't get another one Don't worry about it. I'll speak to my boss. Mr. Clyde. You're sweet honey But I thought he had enough help. Well the other day said he expected to have an opening for a new girl most Anytime he did. Yes, it was right after I spilled the ink well on his new suit Come in Hello girls. Oh Mrs. O'Reilly. What's the matter Janie? You look so depressed. Oh, it's nothing I I was just thinking of quitting my present job. It gets me down Oh, I know how you feel honey making a living can be very trying at times You think I like being a landlady and taking the abuse I do from the professor Just listen to this note. He left on me door this morning If I was a knight in shining armor, you would be mine even though it took force. Why that's lovely That's what I thought but listen to the rest Because what good is a knight in shining armor without a big strong horse He's only killing you Mrs. O'Reilly. I'm sure he likes you. Well, he has a funny way of showing it Last night we were sitting in the parlor and he turned off all the lights Oh, I see he young wanted to get romantic. No, he wanted to get out When I turned on the lights, he was gone. Oh, don't worry. You'll get a man someday You know what they say the first hundred years of the hardest After that they can't run so fast Irma oh, it's all right Janie. I know that Emma doesn't mean anything by that Oh, but I'd have to run along now. I'm taking a singing lesson. Oh, yes. I heard you practicing this morning I wasn't singing. I was running the vacuum cleaner It needs oil in goodbye girls Hello, oh Yes, mr. Thompson What why did I get two reservations on the Santa Fe? Well, I thought you wanted to take your wife What do you mean? I'm stupid What having seen your wife, I should know you wouldn't take her any place Mr. Thompson, I'm not stupid No, and I'm not inefficient and you can't talk to me that way. I I've had enough of you so you can keep your job I I quit Who Jane you quit? Yes. I couldn't take any more Well, Irma Your little roommate is now Unemployed don't worry about it if Al can make a success of it so can you Hello Jane hi chicken Hello Al, honey. Hey, what's the matter with you too? You look like a couple of pickpockets who just found out they've been on television Oh, it's worse than that Al as somebody has just quit her job chicken What about all my plans? It wasn't me. It's Jane Jane. Oh, well Congratulations Thanks. Yeah, you got nothing to worry about Jane. We'll have all the money we can ever use when my latest deal goes through Another deal. What is it this time dipping buttons in tar and selling them for cough drops? Couldn't get it past the pure foods act Now this one is a natural it's a special type roulette wheel for gambling resorts in case of a raid the operator presses a button 16 horses pop out and the guy asked the cops what's wrong about running a merry-go-round You go for it Jane. I'd rather go for a walk. Goodbye Kurt character, what's eating the day? Oh, can't you understand Jane has quit her job and she's terribly upset Chicken do not like the idea of Jane being out of work. She must find something these are prosperous times and jobs is plentiful Then why don't you get one if I did they wouldn't be so plentiful? Gotta protect a little man But forget me chicken have been thinking about Jane think I have evolved the plan Whereby she can get back the job. She just quit. What are you doing? I'm dialing. Mr. Thompson her boss Now you can on the phone you will I say yeah, yeah, we've got to make it sound real sympathetic Just say Mr. Thompson you must take Jane back because the rent is due and she's used to carry in half of the load Which is all you can afford. Hello, mr. Thompson. Just a second take a chicken make it real sad Hello, mr. Thompson the rent is due and you'll have to carry Jane on your back because she's half loaded you can afford it Holy chicken Al he hung up. I wonder why Now guess her job with Thompson is really washed up now Chicken we got to get her another job. Well, if it wasn't for that Carolyn Benson She could go back to work for Richard like your suggestion chicken our next move is to get rid of that Benson day Which calls for desperate measures and between us we can put it over are you with me? Oh, yes, but do you think we're doing the right thing positive after we finish Jane will be only too glad to call us her friends I hope so. I never liked the other name. She calls us Run the tip of your tongue over your teeth if you'll feel a slippery coating You have film on your teeth and you need pepsidon with iriam to remove it for film is worse than you think Film collect stains that make your teeth look dull Pepsidon toothpaste removes film makes your teeth look bright film harbors germs that cause unpleasing breath Pepsidon removes film makes your breath fresh and clean film glues acid to your teeth the very acid many dentists agree Is the cause of tooth decay pepsidon toothpaste removes film and the acids it contains film never lets up It forms continually on your teeth. Yes, you have to fight film every day So brush your teeth twice a day with pepsidon toothpaste Because no other toothpaste can duplicate pepsidon's film removing formula No other toothpaste contains iriam or pepsidon's gentle polishing agent. So start now to fight film Brush your teeth twice a day with pepsidon the toothpaste with an exclusive formula for removing film Little Jane Stacy has really fixed things up for herself with Christmas just around the corner I had to go and quit my job Right now I'm walking along Fifth Avenue trying to reach a decision Shall I go back and talk to mr. Thompson or shall I see if Richard is interested in letting me have my old job back? What to do what to do? Let's see if I go back to mr. Thompson. I could walk into his office and say look I'm sorry. I walked out on you. Will you give me another chance? Well, I'd like to lady, but I'm supposed to meet my wife here in 10 minutes Excuse me So in utter confusion, I tried to lose myself in the nearest telephone booth But just as I reached for the door it opened and who is in the booth but Richard Hi Jane. What a pleasant surprise. I just tried to reach you on the phone I've been thinking of you all day. Well, that's funny. I've been thinking about you too Richard. You have Um, were you really thinking about me? Yes, dear Hey, hey, would you two mind getting out of that telephone booth? Oh? We're sorry you see look lady. I don't care what you say. I know the housing shortage can't be that bad All right. All right. We're going come on Jane. How about having lunch with me? I'd be glad to Tell me Jane, how do you like your present job? My job? Oh Oh, it is positively wonderful. Well, how come you have this morning off? Well, mr. Thompson likes my work so much. He he didn't want me to wear myself out. So he told me to relax today Why do you ask? Well, it doesn't matter now? It's just that Miss Benson the girl who took your place is proving to be inefficient in her work. Why Richard? I Understood you to say she was doing quite well. Well, she is a capable girl But she's rather slow and you know how it is in the brokerage business Jane when the market quotation start hopping all over the board I need a secretary who can work fast. I Guess it's just my hard luck that you're not available, but I am available. I mean I Could be but you said your boss liked your work so much. He gives you time off to relax Well, that's just the trouble. I'm relaxing so much. I'm afraid I'll I'll put on weight in that case then come to work for me How much notice would your boss need? Oh, he's had enough. I mean Richard, I'll take care of everything. Good tomorrow. You start at your old job Poor dame is moping so about losing her job with Thompson. She's probably out casing some bridges to jump off Get her old job back with Richard. I'm working on that chicken Got to find a way to eliminate that Benson day, but how Al? Well, there is various ways of getting rid of undesirable people history is full of various methods For instance, do you know why a guest always stays 20 minutes after having dinner? Yes? It shows good manners now check it Has a historical origin Used to be a dame by the name of Lucretia Borgia who got rid of her undesirable lovers by slipping a little strickening in their artichokes And within 15 minutes they croaked So to this very day when guests stay 20 minutes after dinner, I need to be polite. It's just to make sure they don't drop dead That is just a fortress of knowledge a real rock of Gibraltar Thanks now in considering how we can get this miss Benson out of the picture there is only one course to take We will as they say lost her up Without she might be a nice girl. She might be somebody's daughter Chicken this is a world of cold reality where everything has to be hard and tough. Oh, that reminds me Al Would you like a piece of this cake I just made? No chicken got to stick with this Benson problem Want to break the good news to Jane that we got her job back when she gets here Well, we can't think of something alone. Why should we both sit here and moan? There's only one man to phone Who else who else but hello Joe? Got a problem, huh? You can't talk long. You're in a hurry. What's the rush Joe? Oh, you're going over to the lot to pick up a new car for Christmas. What can't you get in Joe? Anyone that still has the key left in it We'll only take a minute of your time Joe want to know how to get rid of a dame who is working for a Wall Street broker What's my move? Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. Not bad Joe. Thanks a lot and goodbye noble friend Chicken Joe has given me a natural We'll have that Benson dame out of there faster than a second story man Who has just found out the house he's robbing belongs to the district attorney How are you going to do it Al? Well, first we look in the paper and find the most worthless stock on the market Then I call her up pretend. I am one of Richard's new clients authorize her to buy 10,000 shares Naturally when Richard finds out what she has done this cowl and Benson is at that fidget You like it chicken? Well, it sounds all right to me. I'll but suppose she recognizes your voice Already thought about that chicken. We'll place a handkerchief over the mouthpiece. Oh, that's clever Al that way She won't be able to see you Right chicken now where to avoid interruptions. We had best make this call from a public phone. So let's go All right, Al. Uh, here's a kiss for good luck Chicken why do you always hold out of the radiator when you kiss me? Well, it's a shame to waste all this heat You're wonderful tomorrow. I'll be back on the job with a man. I love Richard. Why you sound excited Why you made a killing on the market. Why that's wonderful. Oh It is and it isn't what do you mean? Caroline Benson bought 10,000 shares of a stock that you thought was worthless and it went up. Oh Yes, I understand Richard No, no, of course, I wouldn't expect you to let her go now Congratulations Jane why are you crying dry all your tears Jane have a feeling that won't be long before you Will have your old job back with Richard. Yes, Jane your worries are over. That's what you think Richard just called me He said that somebody gave that miss Benson a tip to buy 10,000 shares of stock and Richard cleaned up All set to go back to work for Richard. Oh if I could only find out who ruined my chair wait a minute Why are you two staring at each other Al? Irma No, no special reason then why are your teeth chattering? I'm on a liquid diet, and I'm chewing my food Irma your teeth are chattering too. I know we both go the same dentist Don't try fooling me I understand now. What are you trying to hide? Chicken we're trapped. We might as well confess Go ahead. Tell Jane what you did Didn't have a job Jane, so I told Al now Al tell her what you did cheeky Tell me I can guess you're the ones that called up and gave miss Benson the tip Well, we only did to help you Jane help when you two scatterbrains start budding into my affairs The only help I need is a long rest in the sanitarium Sorry, you're all this shoes because I said I felt like step leave you at this time But just remember an appointment. I have it eight o'clock down the corner. Well, but Al it's only six o'clock now. It is This corner is over in New Jersey I'll get it Benson This transaction has given you a terrific reputation and you're getting so much more business. You'll need extra help Richard yes, I'll be there. Goodbye. Oh, Jane. You got your job back. Yes, honey, and I don't know how I'll ever thank you and Al Jane do not want your thanks. All we want from you is a little more respect for me and Irma I admit that the general opinion is that Irma's a nitwit and that I'm I'm a bum But you got to remember none of them poles is accurate Honey, I grant that and from now on I'll have a different opinion of you Well, that's well Jane because I want you to have more confidence in me now now yesterday You lost your wrist watch, but you wouldn't ask me to help you find it Well, if I didn't know where it was, how could you know Jane? That's wrong thinking you must trust me more Why because I know where it is I? Dropped it down the garbage disposal Don't think that you were safe from film nearly everyone has it Just run the tip of your tongue over your teeth if you'll feel a slippery coating That's film and you'd better get pepsidon toothpaste to remove it For film collect stains that make teeth look dull it harbors germs that cause unpleasing breath film glues acid to your teeth the very acid that many dentists agree is the cause of tooth decay and Remember film never stops forming. No, it never lets up So brush your teeth twice a day with film removing pepsidon No other toothpaste contains earium or pepsidon's gentle polishing agent No other toothpaste can duplicate pepsidon's film removing formula Get pepsidon toothpaste with earium today Headless of the wrist watch. I'm back working for Richard Ryan lander and all is quite well with the world In fact, I feel so elated. I think I'll take Irma to a movie tonight Irma, would you like to see a new moving picture tonight? Well, what's playing? Well, we can see of the accused or at the return of October. I saw the accused So let's see the return of October that month seemed to fly so fast. I didn't get a chance to see what happened They fly but if there's anything that stands still it's the mind of my friend Irma My friend Irma is produced and directed by Cy Howard and stars Marie Wilson as Irma with Joan Banks as Jane Park Levy writes the script with Stanley Adams and Roland McLean and it's brought to you by pepsidon toothpaste with earium Another fine product of Lieberbrot's company the part of Al was played by John Brown Hans Conneried is Professor Gabbard Can Gloria Gordon was heard as Mrs. O'Reilly and Donald Woods is Richard music was under the direction of blood Bluskin Our American economic system has brought greater material means for happiness to more people than any other nation in view of the propaganda tax from within and without We should now learn the basic facts about our economic system which gives us more jobs Shorter working hours more vacations higher incomes more and better houses schools and food than any other country in the world Let's keep it that way. This is Wendell Niles speaking The RISK brisk flavor. That's what you get in Lipton tea Yes brisk flavor that picks you up brings you back alive in a hurry Brisk flavor that comes from Lipton's very special blending of the finest orange pico and pico teas try it You'll find that this brisk flavor of Lipton's leaves you refreshed and ready to go again And you can enjoy it often because even wonderful tea like Lipton's costs less than any drink except water Always ask for Lipton tea the brisk tea with that heartwarming Lipton lift Junior and one hour earlier next week and listen to the Lux Radio Theatre followed by the pepsidon show my friend