 Hey there friends, how's it going? My name is Kevin and today we're playing some a bit life with a bit of a twist We're going to be a sugar baby and we're gonna solely rely on other people's money I'm not gonna earn any of my own money. In fact, we're gonna be very upfront with this Our first and last name, just sugar baby Looks five percent. No, that's not gonna do You're not cut out for this line of work. I'm gonna pick a hundred percent fertility needs to be very high for this And I think bisexual would be a good idea, you know cast a wide net and all that I'll be extremely stupid to balance it all out. You know, you only have a limited amount of skill points All right start sugar's life I love that name It's just an exclamation right next to smart. God my baby is stupid I don't even know what that is. Oh, I'm kind of afraid to Google it. Let's Google it It causes a barking cough. Maybe sugar baby is a dog. Oh good lord It's not been a good year. Were they born in 2020? Burst local dam flood 612 acres and displaces 28,000 people and I'm suffering from croup I'm gonna say I don't know. I've never even heard of it before then stop shaming me I also have zero percent smart Vaccinated. Oh hell no throw a tantrum on that one. Oh, no, they had a baby Now they're gonna take the focus off me and just when I was starting to get intelligent four percent a new high I'm getting very unhappy every year boost my smarts. How can I do that by playing Minecraft? I guess let's get creative in Minecraft. Wow Minecraft makes you so smart There's something off-putting about the facts like I am seven years old and looks they have this fire emoji Love interest. You don't have any money yet. You're a 10 reject first kiss. No, you don't have any money run away Oh my god, it keeps coming up. All right in all my years of high school I have managed to get my smarts up to 40% do I want university? No, we're taking some time off Let's go meet some people Preferably rich people if they could fund surgery I could make myself even more attractive and then get more people It's an endless cycle and dating app. Yeah, there we go I guess any age like why don't why do I have to put in a specific? I don't care about numbers unless it's got a dollar sign before it Let's just try 20 to 29 and 100,000 plus You don't have enough money to use the dating app. All right start small then How does she have so much money if she's unemployed? All right, you know what start dating? Yay Will you marry me? She thinks I'm pretty nice. Do you think she'll give me money ask for money? God damn it. You said you're broke I've seen the bear saying that you're not broke. Oh, she's pregnant. Oh The last name is coming in handy here because I'm just gonna call it unwanted. So it's unwanted, baby She keeps denying giving me money, but I just want to make money from being a mooch So it's gonna be hard should I just abandon her? I think I might abandon her. We're breaking up minus 2,000 God damn babies. It's time to vaccinate your daughter unwanted. What will you do? No surprise here? Why can I not abandon you yet? You're too time to move out. You got to get independence some point Let's try and find someone else who actually has money and didn't lie in their application to date me Now that is money. Yes. I just asked her today and she's like, yeah, you are basically the perfect man Everything is full except smart. I know you're not broke. All right, hold on Let me just have a baby with you and we can break up one can be called second baby This isn't the plan I had in mind. I want to be a mooch. I don't want to create more babies I'm just hemorrhaging money. Hold on. Let's let's break up. I'm sensing a pattern here It's not even on purpose. I just want money your baby. Mama. Just send you a pic of her abs forwarded to my friends I just send it to everyone like an abandon unwanted baby now. She's for awesome. Adios If I were the richest person in the world, I would start my own country and call it nice people land. I Guess so that they're all nice and they can give me money and I can be a mooch off them The one person who actually is a job and she has no money like all the unemployed people are saying they've loads of money It doesn't add up. You're all 18 year olds without a job. How can you be that rich? All right, look Sophia here is an insurance agent and it says she doesn't have that much money But the others are clearly lying. All right, Sophia. You are just great. I'd like to give you a compliment I'll look even said you are great. We will go to the movies. I hope you have money because I don't okay now That we have done the mandatory required socialization. Do you have any money? You are broke? I know that is a lie That's it. I'm gonna shave your head. I measured response I know this is meant to be cornrows, but in this context, it looks like I was just shaving off random bats I'll go with that haircut. I'm 25 years old and I have done nothing. Can someone please give me money I look for another date. Someone else will give me money. I'm not very good at being a sugar baby Oh now she doesn't like me. Why don't you like me? We're breaking up. It's not me. It's you I'm so angry. I could just abandon my son. In fact, I think I will He's fucking beaming. He's so happy crazy and rich ask on date. Should be moving away soon I know that's a lie. You may as well say you're washing your hair fantastic name, but I have to pass Maybe the problem is they're all too smart because the if why would you give me money? I mean you'd want to be an idiot So let's find someone stupid and rich found a new girlfriend could I have money please? You're not fecking broke. You're lying to me. Look at how much money you have You're a liar. All right, maybe I should try and marry her and then Then divorce her. I'd want to do it quick because I'm hemorrhaging money here Do you think if I propose without a ring I could get away with it? Like I don't have any money, so I can't really afford it without a ring on a ferris wheel. She rejected. God damn it. All you care about is money I am not a hypocrite. She's pregnant. Okay. Keep the baby and now we'll get married. You have to I'll guilt you into it I am Catholic. Why are you rejecting me? My father died. Did you at least have money? Oh, we got a baby. Yeah, we'll call it guilt baby so that I can guilt her into marrying me How can I do this? My dad didn't even leave me any money How can I get enough money to buy a ring so I can marry her and then divorce her and have money? My mom gave me a hundred bucks. It's kind of a drop in the ocean. Unfortunately. I'm so much in debt second clown I'm a feckin clown already except no one's paying me for it. I Wish I had money and I told me to stop asking for money I'm not sure what's gotten into my girlfriend lately probably cuz I just keep asking her for money. Oh My mom just married someone and they have loads of money. They're not very kind But maybe I can get something now that you have a stepfather You're wondering how to address him daddy colon Please daddy colon Could I have some pocket money? He's like dude. You're 33. Oh, please daddy Yes, he gave me money Unfortunately, it's still just a bit of a drop in the ocean, but the good thing is if My stepfather and mother die. I should get a bit of money from that He is pissed at me your stepfather isn't interested in having a conversation with you I imagine because it would go something like this. Oh good evening step son. How are you? Oh, hello daddy May I have some money your son guilt is asking for five bucks to buy a fire truck? No, look You're not gonna get anywhere in life. Just ask him for money. Okay, go earn it young grateful little Daddy can I have some more money? Thank you. The thing is even when he gives me money I still lose more every year should probably have more babies. That might be a good idea I like how I'm proposing in like a ski lodge Do I just do a day trip drive there and go into someone's lodge and then ask her to marry me cuz I can't afford a ski lodge I can't even afford skis. She rejected. How can I get your money acquaintance has offered you 20 grand? It takes case to Italy. I'm gonna have to do it sure. What could go wrong that? I am spending five years in jail. Okay, and she wants to break up. I baked her to say and she changed her mind Great. Oh, now she wants to break up again. I'll bake her to stay. She dumped you anyway I've been released from prison. How close are you to death? You're 70. All right. That's good. That's good Can we just can we edit them? Just just a little bit just a little bit. Oh, it's held already a 4% Let's just finish that off for him. Let's take a look at my own mother as well. Just started curiosity. What is your health? It's really good. That's great to see. All right. Now we wait. Oh, yes mama. I will go to a painting class I think we should build up our relationship. Let's talk and stuff. You're 78. How you feeling recently? You bit wobbly? I don't want a job. Working is not for me. Who is this? You met a lady named Crystal who has lots of money. She rejected. The family wouldn't approve you. Well, mine wouldn't approve of you either. Mainly because anyone who's stupid enough to date sugar baby It's just not a person you want to be around. Well, you were out grocery shopping You see that a dirty old man in front of you is slightly short of money when checking out. What am I supposed to do? What am I even doing in a shop? I have no money. I died. What did I die of? Natural causes. Continuous my child, don't worry. We still have a chance at this. But look, how did they turn out so good? Well, these ones because I abandoned them, I guess. All right, guilt. We're gonna be you. You've already built up a nice little buffer for me. So let's immediately quit her job. Wait a second. Hold on. My late father sugar baby died of natural causes. He left behind debts in the amount of 44,000. My siblings and I each inherited a debt of 14 grand. Oh my god. Resign, yeah. He's like, I suddenly feel like some unnatural evil force has taken over my life. All right, you have money. Rejected me, called me a jackass. Why? Because I quit my good teaching job for no good reason. I'm gonna become a YouTuber. That'll show her. Sugar baby spent 58 years trying to do this. Guilt baby is gonna accomplish it. Lots of money. You are now dating Carson McQueen. Now that we're dating, am I giving me a loan? Let's try proposing. I'm gonna go get a ring, a nice one, too. I gotta be careful here because I want to make a return on my investment. Yeah, you know what? I think that'll do it. Yeah, buy it. Propose as a funeral. She rejected. I wonder why. No, I don't want a good, steady, well-paying job. Leave me alone. Let's try and propose now. She must have forgotten about that. That was like 12 months ago. Let's propose at a beach. She accepted. Okay, it was the funeral. That was the problem. I just saw the word fun in it, and I didn't read the rest. I have a fever. Oh, no. I better say a prayer. Let's get married before something bad happens. Where do you want to go? I don't really care. Rio. Sounds cool. Yeah, do it. Yeah, it's grand. Yeah, that's... She's so much money. You want a prenup? Why? What have I done to give you any indication that I'm just marrying you for money? Now that we're dating, mind giving me a loan? Like, if the average out-or-weld were both that like 500,000, it's technically true. I don't think it's that convincing though. I'm calling off the wedding. I don't want a prenup. I have difficulty sleeping because I don't have enough money. Let's try this again. Let's plan a nicer wedding. Maybe she'll have forgotten. Why is she not getting pregnant? I don't understand. I'm trying to guilt her into this. Oh, she's on birth control. Could you stop taking that, please? Thank you very much. She's like, I don't see why not. Yay, baby time. We're gonna call this one backup baby because I don't think this guy's gonna work out either. All right, God may have intervened and made her a little bit more stupid. Okay, this is a big wedding. Why do you keep insisting on this? You're an idiot. Now, you shouldn't even know what prenup means. We're gonna agree to sign the prenup and then we're just gonna murder her. There we go. This is the one opportunity to change his name from Mr. Baby, but no, we're gonna keep it Mr. Baby. Oh, please, Mr. Baby's my father's name. Call me guilt. Wait, you had a daughter? So now I have a stepdaughter? Oh, this sucks. Can I abandon her on your behalf? Goodbye. She's not happy with me. She won't even give me money now. Guilt baby is going to be guilty of murder in a second because I need to do something about this. Oh my God, that's a lot of money. That is Al Capone after all. He's good at what he does, but you're mainly paying for the brand. Wait, what? You hired a private investigator to discover that your wife, Carson, is dating someone half her age? What? I'm supposed to be the bad one. Should we divorce her? Just forgive and forget for now. I'll get her killed. Oh, this one's way cheaper. Machine Gun Kelly is willing to kill her for 7,800. He pulled it off using a lightsaber. Where did the money go? Where did the money go, Carson? I know we had that prenup, but you're dead. Where is the money gone? It can't be gone to your daughter. I abandoned her. God, being a sugar baby is hard. I'm going into the negative on money again. You come across a briefcase filled with what appears to be morphine. You know what? Consume all of it at this point. Oh my God, the poor dude. Back up, baby. You're our last hope. I've inherited the dead and also the sister who I abandoned got the other half of the death. You're suffering from the flu. Oh yeah, I forgot you're not vaccinated for anything. Well, that's a shame. This is going to make it a lot harder. I'm the principal in the school, Mr. Kevin, because it's called me Kevin. Oh, great. Oh my God. That is a lot of big words. This isn't good. Go to the doctor. Great doctor names. I'm going to go to Dr. Cockwallis. At least he treated me. I honestly thought he was going to say, Hey, you've no money. I'm not treating you even though you're a child. We have a new principal now. Okay. I guess I got fired probably for good reason. Now my next job is to hide in the showers. I met a guy, Magus. I hope I can get his name. And I can be back up Magus. It's such a better name. I need some money to wipe my father's dead so I can buy a beckon wedding ring, get married, kill him, get the money. It's not that hard when you really spell it out like that, but it's just not working. I keep asking my stepsister who I abandoned for money and she's luckily giving me some. Come on, just a bit more and I can work off this debt more, more. I just keep going back to her. She keeps giving it to me. She's so stupid. This is why you were abandoned, Shanice. Maybe her name is Shanice. She's just too nice for her own good. Yes, more. I'm almost in the positive. She said stop asking for money, but I only need another 98 bucks. Asked her for more money after giving her loads of compliments and then she called me a whore. Baby sitter. I could just ignore the damn thing. There we go, 250 bucks. Wow. I'll buy a pearl ring. That's kind of cool, right? Are a paradox ring? How about that? It's super, super, super fancy. You've probably never heard of it. Rejected. Why? I have a ring. All right. You know what? You're wasting my fecking time. We're breaking up while waiting at the bus stop. You came across a shopping bag filled with what appears to be PCP. Oh, no. I won't fall for that again. I probably should have sold it now I think about it, but I would have gotten trouble. Look, I keep making stupid, like, just quick decisions. I need to stop. Let's get a job for one year so I can afford to buy a ring. There we go. Male stripper even though I'm female. I'm not qualified. God damn it. Your co-worker Crispin just winked at you and said that you're on the top of his to-do list. You see, this is why three generations of my family have never worked because of pigs like you, Crispin. Do him. And he gave me a raise. I'm just short a few bucks to actually buy the diamond ring. Could someone just give me some cash, please? Shanice. I know we haven't had the best history, but I just complimented you. Could you give me some money? She called you stanky. It's a little mean, a bit unnecessary. There we go. Now spend every penny on a ring, hoping that he'll marry us. Rejected. No, it can't be me. That's not possible. You are pregnant. Keep the baby and now propose. You gotta, you gotta, dude. You keep rejecting me, dude, and I'm getting really pissed off. We're breaking up until I find someone who's easier. Let's try that dating app now because we, we have money and we can actually use it. 40 to 49, 100,000 plus. There you go. Go on a date. Perfect. Oh yeah. Sorry about the baby. I forgot to mention that. We'll call it some dude's baby. We don't need to talk about that guy. Why is everyone rejecting poor backup baby? She's tried her best and no one will marry her. We're breaking up. I'm sorry. We need to find someone fast. Can I find someone like super old? Would that be a good idea? They probably won't be as cautious. I don't understand why no one is willing to marry backup baby. I've never struggled in this game so much to get someone to marry. I'm just gonna fucking murder him. He's gone too far now. Wait, I didn't ex-husband called Jesus? When? What? Backup was married to Jesus? Are you confused? Oh, there we go. Okay. Now it's right. I broke up with them and now you can do it. So let's just kill him with a drive-by. Wait, I don't have a driving license. Sorry. He called the police on me. Oh, god damn it. I'm going to jail, aren't I? Yeah, 41 years. All right, you know what? Just die. Just die. Rumble. Yeah, rumble with whoever the biggest person is in prison. I don't know what I'm spamming. All I know is I clicked on one that was just hiding in my rectum. Yes, I'm dead. Continuous some dudes. Yeah, continuous some dudes. How do you have so much money? What happened? When I'm not in control of these people, they seem to do completely fine. All right, you know what? Let's, let's try this immediately. Before I do anything, just ask this guy on a date. He proposed to me. What the hell is going on? As soon as I get him in control, everything goes to hell. Accept proposal. Thank you very much. How much money do you have, by the way? Let's get married first at a barn. Sounds nice. On the Great Wall of China, yeah, sure. A prenup. Oh, wait, he is worth less. Okay, make him sign a prenup. When the shoe's on the other foot, it's very different. All right, now let's try and kill him. All right, Isaiah, husband. Look for a hit, man. 18K higher and pulled off the hit using a bull whip. Okay. Yes, I got all his money. I inherited it. Fantastic. Skip the funeral. I might raise a few eyebrows. I'm worth a million. All right, some dudes, baby. I think you've done pretty well here, considering, you know, all the murder and the horrible genetics you were born with. You weren't vaccinated and just, you were just very unloved. Let's emigrate and give you a happy ending. We're gonna fly to Austria and we're gonna buy a haunted colonial home. Buy it with cash. Everything seems to be going wrong with my health. Could this be because I'm not vaccinated? Or is it that I live in a haunted house? It could be the ghosts. I'm pretty sure I gave some dude's baby an STD because right after her husband was tragically killed, I solicited an escort that I met on the street. Oh, no. While resting peacefully in your bed, you begin to sense a slight tug on the back of your hair. Then you feel it again. Let's investigate. Oh my God, a ghost. A white-gound woman is wailing. She floats by your face as muffled and concealed by a clasped bony hand. She lets out a frustrated streak. Insult it. You called it a snake. It vanished as quickly as it appeared. And I got a heart attack and died. She was doing great in life. And then I take control. I'm immediately like, let's marry a dude. Let's kill a dude. Let's sleep with a random escort. Move to Austria by a haunted mansion and die of a heart attack. You know, I don't think it was even the strategy. I think I was the problem. I really do. And it is hard to say that. For the first time in my gaming career, I'm willing to think about considering taking partial responsibility for that. But I hope you enjoyed the video. I appreciate you watching. Let me know if you want to see more BitLife and let me know if you got any cool ideas. All right, but in the meantime, thank you very much for watching and I hope to see you tomorrow. Bye for now.